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- Jan 27, 2023
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Hi there! 
Another long post from yours truly. Today I intend to share with you my FTE story, my plan for achieving my personal Fastlane, my current daily actions to get there, and what changes helped me drastically reduce my procrastination.
The Highway To Hell
You see, I read MJ DeMarco’s books while in college and while working for a marketing agency… three years ago. Yep, three years ago. Younger me had thought reading it was enough to have my FTE. But as MJ had warned in his book, you’ll get plenty of fake FTEs—those that shoot up euphoria and motivation under your veins and make you think you’ll finally do what you need to and be free.
I had plenty of fake FTEs. Always starting something. Growing bored with it. Abandoning it. An idea for making a healthier, lower in calories granola. Other for selling vegan ice cream. Another for starting an accessories brand. Another for building a software (I had even started learning code for that one!). None of them stuck for too long. I didn’t have a deep, meaningful why behind them to keep me going.
One fake FTE was particularly memorable, though. It was December, and my little store was selling special limited products for Christmas. One night, when I got back home from that work in the agency, I saw my store had earned, in less than two hours, more than what I made in a month at my job. This opened my eyes to reality—hard work doesn’t mean much if you're working hard on the wrong thing. Because I can guarantee you I worked much harder at the agency than in the store. That day was the reason I quit my job. At the time, I thought this—this!—was my beautiful, shiny, real FTE.
Spoiler: it wasn’t.
Silly, silly me. It took having a taste of hell to get my real one.
Fast forward to 2021 and 2022. Crushing under family pressure, doubting myself, feeling like a failure and a fraud, I gave up on my foolish attempts at entrepreneurship and settled to spend those two years studying hard to apply for a good, safe, high-status government job.
(Side note: in my country, being a government employee is considered financially and culturally better than working for the private sector. The salaries are generally higher than a typical company job and there’s a so-called “stability” to it, meaning it’s way more difficult to get fired. It also means doing the same thing for the same payment that, mind you, isn’t well adjusted to inflation for forty years. When you retire, your salary becomes one-quarter of what you used to earn. And there’s more: to actually get that job, you have to face high competition and pass a difficult exam first.)
So there I was, learning for the first time in my life hundreds of laws and a bunch of administrative lingoes. Forcing myself every day to get up and study boring and annoying subjects. I tolerated every second of my studying sessions with clenched teeth. I was trying to please my parents and calm my own fears that I would never amount to anything in life. Trying to convince myself that was what I wanted.
As if going through this and the pandemic weren’t enough, heavy personal problems hit me with steel force. 2021 and 2022 were the worst years of my entire life. What happened in that period deeply affected my mental and physical health. It felt like walking through hell. Scorched skin. Blind eyes. Darkness wrapping all around me like a suffocating mantle. During that time, I wished I didn’t exist. I felt like a terrified little girl. I had become a shell of myself.
And yet…
I kept studying anyway. Despite dealing with insomnia, collapsing in tears at 3 am and constantly passing out in the middle of the street, I didn’t give up. I remember saying to myself, I can’t surrender to this. Can’t afford to stop now. Not now, not now. I have to find a way to keep going.
Turns out, the only way out of hell is through.
In December 2022, I was talking about all of this with a therapist. And then she commented on something that changed the perception I had of myself. She told me, “It takes some remarkable grit to keep working on a goal for that long while facing such difficult challenges.” That’s when it dawned on me—I was more resilient than I ever gave myself credit for.
At the end of 2022, I did the exam. Between more than eighty thousand candidates, I was in the thousand ones that had passed. But my score still wasn’t high enough to actually get the job. Didn’t matter. My spectacular, time-sucking failure birthed the belief that I can do anything I set my mind to.
In the last month of 2022, finally healing, and finally feeling like myself again, I decided I would make 2023 the best year of my life—so far. I decided I would follow the goals that deeply mattered to me. No excuses this time. No people-pleasing. No backing out.
Where I’m going
To achieve my personal Fastlane goal and live the life that I dream of, I decided to… (drum roll please) become an author. (Sort of. I’ll later explain what I mean.)
Yeah, I know, I know what you’re thinking: oh, no, not another one…
I won’t be another one. I intend to write fiction and nonfiction. The fiction books will be set for a worldwide audience (keep in mind a dollar is worth almost six times more than my country’s currency. Six freaking times!). The educational content will be limited to my country’s language.
And I’ll explain why:
A brief CENTS analysis
First, I’m well (painfully) aware the book publishing business usually violates the Control Commandment. Selling on Amazon is unavoidable in this case, but selling exclusively on Amazon is insanity. I’ve seen way too many stories of authors whose accounts are wrongly terminated and end up losing their business. So my plan is to mitigate Amazon’s influence by creating multiple possible income streams. I can distribute my products to other bookstores, build my own shop, create a Patreon, upload audiobooks on YouTube, publish on paid writing apps, get a traditional publishing contract… There are many options, but I’m not thinking too much about this now since this will come later. For my educational content, audience building will obviously depend on social media since that’s where my target audience is, but the business itself will be hosted on a platform entirely owned by me.
Also, I know what you’re thinking: book publishing it’s a low-entry business. It’s an overcrowded market. Anyone can go and hit publish on Amazon. But then I remember what MJ DeMarco said in one of his books: you compensate for low entry barriers with excellence. And I know I’m skilled at writing. Not because I’ve said so, but because that’s what people have been telling me since I was twelve years old. I’ve won prizes on some of my stories, always been the one my friends and co-workers went to for writing and grammar advice, and all that I did while working at the two agencies was basically writing stuff and editing others’ mistakes. One time I had even my ex-boss look me dead in the eye and say writing was my “gift.” The next ex-boss told me the same thing (ugh). So yes, I do believe I’m able to offer excellence here and not write crap. Considering all the free stories I’ve posted in this lifetime have always managed to get a fair amount of passionate readers, I know the kind of fiction I write can resonate with bigger audiences and be commercially appealing. In regard to the nonfiction business, I believe the entry barrier is higher due to the specific knowledge needed to build it.
The genre I chose for the books is one of the largest in the market, with customers whose typical behavior is to binge-read books and form some sort of emotional attachment to them. I plan to write following genre expectations (though taking care of not slipping into too many clichés) but also differentiating myself from other authors by adding specific elements to my stories so that with time they will help position myself as a unique brand in the market. My nonfiction content will fill a potential knowledge gap in my country’s target audience. That’s why it will be limited to my native language—I haven’t found any other content creator in my country that’s talking about what I want to talk about to the audience I’m aiming for. At least not yet. I’m sure that if I’m thinking about this, there’s someone out there who’s thinking the same.
Time and Scale. I know it will take a lot of time to write content, edit, publish, market, build an audience, build a successful brand, etc. I don’t care, I’m in for the long run. But when the books are up in different stores and when the nonfiction content turns into a subscription business model, then it’s there, ready for consumption, 24 hours a day. The potential scalability for content-based businesses is one of its most attractive aspects in my humble opinion. The cost to sell one or millions is marginal at best.
Finding work that feels like play
Yes. I’m aware there are better ideas out there. Easier ways. Faster ways. Less overcrowded markets. And I know I have plenty of other ideas that may fit the CENTS commandments better. But I don’t have a meaningful reason to be obsessed enough to pursue them, to keep going, taking daily action, for months, years, decades on end. I would probably give up on them sooner or later because they don’t mean much to me on a personal level.
You see, I’m only choosing to go through this path because it’s the only one that I’m naturally obsessed with. It’s the only one that carries a deep, personally meaningful why behind it. It’s the only one that satisfies my two personal criteria: it’s an internet-based business and it puts my professional knowledge, personal experiences and skills to use. It’s the only thing that makes me get out of bed with actual enthusiasm. It’s the only thing I see myself doing every day for hours on end until I’m old. As Naval Ravikant says, I’m going after work that feels like play.
What I’m doing this month
So what am I doing to achieve all of this? Taking action. Every single day.
(Random side note: I already started this year low-key proud of myself: I achieved all my January goals and I’m even ahead of my schedule!
)
Now, these are the following actions I’m taking to meet the goals stated for this month in particular. I have different goals and actions for each month with specific deadlines to guarantee that, by the end of the year, I’ll have achieved my major goals for 2023. Instead of trying to do everything at once at the same time, I’ve established that during each month I’ll focus on only a few things. This keeps my stress and my overthinking at bay.
1) I write at least 2200 words 6 times per week, first thing in the morning after breakfast because that’s the most important task of my day, so if for whatever reason I can’t do anything else, at least I did this. I keep track of my word count on a spreadsheet and I usually surpass this goal by doing two 30min sprints with a 5min break. If I’m in a flow state, I just keep writing and ignore the timer.
2) I split the rest of my free hours for focused work between editing a story and translating it to English (a major pain in the a$$ in which I constantly ask myself, does this even make sense, is this even grammatically correct, am I an illiterate sociopath, but also fun because I get to use specific words that simply don’t exist in my native language, such as trudge), doing 45min sprints with 5 to 10min breaks. Again, if I’m in flow state, I just keep going.
3) I set apart at least one hour and thirty minutes of my day to learn. At least 30min to read a book that teaches me how to get better at my craft. Then another 30min for a business book. And, before going to bed, I use the last 30min to read quality fiction, which I believe is essential for improving my writing.
4) I prioritize my health: I go to sleep before 10 pm and wake up before 6 am every day. I work out 6 times per week, even when I don’t want to. I eat healthy foods, make sure to hit my protein target and drink plenty of water. I go to therapy once a week to work on any personal issues. I try to go out with my closest friends two times per month—I’m way too comfortable being by myself, so if I don’t pay attention to this, I easily become a hermit.
Following "That Girl" Routine or How I'm preventing myself from self-sabotage and procrastination
If you happen to be reading this post and you’re struggling to get shit done, I genuinely hope this section can help you in some way.
I stopped mindlessly consuming content
No secrets to this one. I just turned the goddamn TV off. Stopped watching Netflix or any other streaming service. I’ve limited my time on social media to less than 30 min a day. Also stopped watching the news. It’s remarkable how suddenly you have so much free time on your hands.
I fell in love with Notion
Notion is my savior. I have a page with my 2023 goals, my monthly goals, and a general list of things to do that are organized by importance, urgency, theme, and deadline if there’s one. I also created a side page to keep all the information I’ve learned from books, videos, courses, and podcasts.
I started documenting my journey
I take pictures of what I’m doing every day. When I’m having a healthy breakfast early in the morning, I take it. When I’m about to edit, write or translate something, I take it. When I’m reading a valuable book, I take it. When I finish exercising, I take it. I keep the photos on an album titled 2023. I want my future self to be able to look back at those pictures and remember exactly what I did every single day to get where I want to be. I think documenting your journey (you can take pictures, write a sentence before bed to sum up your day, record yourself, etc) helps keep you accountable as well. Taking pictures of my actions forces me to stop going through the motions in my day and actually look at what I’m doing on a daily basis. It forces me to stay committed to my plan.
I became a notebook hoarder
The dream life notebook
The first page of this notebook has my 2023 goals and the goals for the month I’m in. The second page is filled with pictures of my dream life and future achievements. I look at those pages every day, three times a day. In the morning before breakfast, in the afternoon after lunch (when I’m tempted to slack and do nothing at all), and before going to sleep. This way I constantly remind myself of what I truly want out of my life and what I have to do to get there.
The daily goals notebook
I also have a small notebook where I write, the day before, the three most important tasks I have to do the next day. This has been helping me immensely and reduced my tendency to procrastinate.
The inspiration notebook
The last notebook is filled with quotes I found beautiful and interesting. I collect words and my favorite passages from fiction books like they’re my precious little trinkets. It helps my creativity and the quality of my writing.
I made my goals public
It’s what I’m doing now. It’s another way to guilt trip me into commitment—to avoid the feeling of humiliation if I don’t follow through with my goals, to avoid turning my words into empty promises.
I got a support network
That’s one of the reasons I’m here. It’s important to surround yourself with like-minded people who can show you it’s possible to achieve whatever you want. Because we know most of our relatives and friends won’t understand this and won’t encourage us. I’m also fortunate that my mother is extremely supportive of my plans and believes in me. I think it’s great if you can get at least one person that believes you can do this. Someone that can say, “Pull yourself together!", when the journey gets tough.
That’s it for now. I plan to share my thoughts and how my journey’s going at least once a month. Thank you for reading!
Another long post from yours truly. Today I intend to share with you my FTE story, my plan for achieving my personal Fastlane, my current daily actions to get there, and what changes helped me drastically reduce my procrastination.The Highway To Hell
You see, I read MJ DeMarco’s books while in college and while working for a marketing agency… three years ago. Yep, three years ago. Younger me had thought reading it was enough to have my FTE. But as MJ had warned in his book, you’ll get plenty of fake FTEs—those that shoot up euphoria and motivation under your veins and make you think you’ll finally do what you need to and be free.
I had plenty of fake FTEs. Always starting something. Growing bored with it. Abandoning it. An idea for making a healthier, lower in calories granola. Other for selling vegan ice cream. Another for starting an accessories brand. Another for building a software (I had even started learning code for that one!). None of them stuck for too long. I didn’t have a deep, meaningful why behind them to keep me going.
One fake FTE was particularly memorable, though. It was December, and my little store was selling special limited products for Christmas. One night, when I got back home from that work in the agency, I saw my store had earned, in less than two hours, more than what I made in a month at my job. This opened my eyes to reality—hard work doesn’t mean much if you're working hard on the wrong thing. Because I can guarantee you I worked much harder at the agency than in the store. That day was the reason I quit my job. At the time, I thought this—this!—was my beautiful, shiny, real FTE.
Spoiler: it wasn’t.
Silly, silly me. It took having a taste of hell to get my real one.
Fast forward to 2021 and 2022. Crushing under family pressure, doubting myself, feeling like a failure and a fraud, I gave up on my foolish attempts at entrepreneurship and settled to spend those two years studying hard to apply for a good, safe, high-status government job.
(Side note: in my country, being a government employee is considered financially and culturally better than working for the private sector. The salaries are generally higher than a typical company job and there’s a so-called “stability” to it, meaning it’s way more difficult to get fired. It also means doing the same thing for the same payment that, mind you, isn’t well adjusted to inflation for forty years. When you retire, your salary becomes one-quarter of what you used to earn. And there’s more: to actually get that job, you have to face high competition and pass a difficult exam first.)
So there I was, learning for the first time in my life hundreds of laws and a bunch of administrative lingoes. Forcing myself every day to get up and study boring and annoying subjects. I tolerated every second of my studying sessions with clenched teeth. I was trying to please my parents and calm my own fears that I would never amount to anything in life. Trying to convince myself that was what I wanted.
As if going through this and the pandemic weren’t enough, heavy personal problems hit me with steel force. 2021 and 2022 were the worst years of my entire life. What happened in that period deeply affected my mental and physical health. It felt like walking through hell. Scorched skin. Blind eyes. Darkness wrapping all around me like a suffocating mantle. During that time, I wished I didn’t exist. I felt like a terrified little girl. I had become a shell of myself.
And yet…
I kept studying anyway. Despite dealing with insomnia, collapsing in tears at 3 am and constantly passing out in the middle of the street, I didn’t give up. I remember saying to myself, I can’t surrender to this. Can’t afford to stop now. Not now, not now. I have to find a way to keep going.
Turns out, the only way out of hell is through.
In December 2022, I was talking about all of this with a therapist. And then she commented on something that changed the perception I had of myself. She told me, “It takes some remarkable grit to keep working on a goal for that long while facing such difficult challenges.” That’s when it dawned on me—I was more resilient than I ever gave myself credit for.
At the end of 2022, I did the exam. Between more than eighty thousand candidates, I was in the thousand ones that had passed. But my score still wasn’t high enough to actually get the job. Didn’t matter. My spectacular, time-sucking failure birthed the belief that I can do anything I set my mind to.
In the last month of 2022, finally healing, and finally feeling like myself again, I decided I would make 2023 the best year of my life—so far. I decided I would follow the goals that deeply mattered to me. No excuses this time. No people-pleasing. No backing out.
Where I’m going
To achieve my personal Fastlane goal and live the life that I dream of, I decided to… (drum roll please) become an author. (Sort of. I’ll later explain what I mean.)
Yeah, I know, I know what you’re thinking: oh, no, not another one…
I won’t be another one. I intend to write fiction and nonfiction. The fiction books will be set for a worldwide audience (keep in mind a dollar is worth almost six times more than my country’s currency. Six freaking times!). The educational content will be limited to my country’s language.
And I’ll explain why:
A brief CENTS analysis
First, I’m well (painfully) aware the book publishing business usually violates the Control Commandment. Selling on Amazon is unavoidable in this case, but selling exclusively on Amazon is insanity. I’ve seen way too many stories of authors whose accounts are wrongly terminated and end up losing their business. So my plan is to mitigate Amazon’s influence by creating multiple possible income streams. I can distribute my products to other bookstores, build my own shop, create a Patreon, upload audiobooks on YouTube, publish on paid writing apps, get a traditional publishing contract… There are many options, but I’m not thinking too much about this now since this will come later. For my educational content, audience building will obviously depend on social media since that’s where my target audience is, but the business itself will be hosted on a platform entirely owned by me.
Also, I know what you’re thinking: book publishing it’s a low-entry business. It’s an overcrowded market. Anyone can go and hit publish on Amazon. But then I remember what MJ DeMarco said in one of his books: you compensate for low entry barriers with excellence. And I know I’m skilled at writing. Not because I’ve said so, but because that’s what people have been telling me since I was twelve years old. I’ve won prizes on some of my stories, always been the one my friends and co-workers went to for writing and grammar advice, and all that I did while working at the two agencies was basically writing stuff and editing others’ mistakes. One time I had even my ex-boss look me dead in the eye and say writing was my “gift.” The next ex-boss told me the same thing (ugh). So yes, I do believe I’m able to offer excellence here and not write crap. Considering all the free stories I’ve posted in this lifetime have always managed to get a fair amount of passionate readers, I know the kind of fiction I write can resonate with bigger audiences and be commercially appealing. In regard to the nonfiction business, I believe the entry barrier is higher due to the specific knowledge needed to build it.
The genre I chose for the books is one of the largest in the market, with customers whose typical behavior is to binge-read books and form some sort of emotional attachment to them. I plan to write following genre expectations (though taking care of not slipping into too many clichés) but also differentiating myself from other authors by adding specific elements to my stories so that with time they will help position myself as a unique brand in the market. My nonfiction content will fill a potential knowledge gap in my country’s target audience. That’s why it will be limited to my native language—I haven’t found any other content creator in my country that’s talking about what I want to talk about to the audience I’m aiming for. At least not yet. I’m sure that if I’m thinking about this, there’s someone out there who’s thinking the same.
Time and Scale. I know it will take a lot of time to write content, edit, publish, market, build an audience, build a successful brand, etc. I don’t care, I’m in for the long run. But when the books are up in different stores and when the nonfiction content turns into a subscription business model, then it’s there, ready for consumption, 24 hours a day. The potential scalability for content-based businesses is one of its most attractive aspects in my humble opinion. The cost to sell one or millions is marginal at best.
Finding work that feels like play
Yes. I’m aware there are better ideas out there. Easier ways. Faster ways. Less overcrowded markets. And I know I have plenty of other ideas that may fit the CENTS commandments better. But I don’t have a meaningful reason to be obsessed enough to pursue them, to keep going, taking daily action, for months, years, decades on end. I would probably give up on them sooner or later because they don’t mean much to me on a personal level.
You see, I’m only choosing to go through this path because it’s the only one that I’m naturally obsessed with. It’s the only one that carries a deep, personally meaningful why behind it. It’s the only one that satisfies my two personal criteria: it’s an internet-based business and it puts my professional knowledge, personal experiences and skills to use. It’s the only thing that makes me get out of bed with actual enthusiasm. It’s the only thing I see myself doing every day for hours on end until I’m old. As Naval Ravikant says, I’m going after work that feels like play.
What I’m doing this month
So what am I doing to achieve all of this? Taking action. Every single day.
(Random side note: I already started this year low-key proud of myself: I achieved all my January goals and I’m even ahead of my schedule!
)Now, these are the following actions I’m taking to meet the goals stated for this month in particular. I have different goals and actions for each month with specific deadlines to guarantee that, by the end of the year, I’ll have achieved my major goals for 2023. Instead of trying to do everything at once at the same time, I’ve established that during each month I’ll focus on only a few things. This keeps my stress and my overthinking at bay.
1) I write at least 2200 words 6 times per week, first thing in the morning after breakfast because that’s the most important task of my day, so if for whatever reason I can’t do anything else, at least I did this. I keep track of my word count on a spreadsheet and I usually surpass this goal by doing two 30min sprints with a 5min break. If I’m in a flow state, I just keep writing and ignore the timer.
2) I split the rest of my free hours for focused work between editing a story and translating it to English (a major pain in the a$$ in which I constantly ask myself, does this even make sense, is this even grammatically correct, am I an illiterate sociopath, but also fun because I get to use specific words that simply don’t exist in my native language, such as trudge), doing 45min sprints with 5 to 10min breaks. Again, if I’m in flow state, I just keep going.
3) I set apart at least one hour and thirty minutes of my day to learn. At least 30min to read a book that teaches me how to get better at my craft. Then another 30min for a business book. And, before going to bed, I use the last 30min to read quality fiction, which I believe is essential for improving my writing.
4) I prioritize my health: I go to sleep before 10 pm and wake up before 6 am every day. I work out 6 times per week, even when I don’t want to. I eat healthy foods, make sure to hit my protein target and drink plenty of water. I go to therapy once a week to work on any personal issues. I try to go out with my closest friends two times per month—I’m way too comfortable being by myself, so if I don’t pay attention to this, I easily become a hermit.
Following "That Girl" Routine or How I'm preventing myself from self-sabotage and procrastination
If you happen to be reading this post and you’re struggling to get shit done, I genuinely hope this section can help you in some way.
I stopped mindlessly consuming content
No secrets to this one. I just turned the goddamn TV off. Stopped watching Netflix or any other streaming service. I’ve limited my time on social media to less than 30 min a day. Also stopped watching the news. It’s remarkable how suddenly you have so much free time on your hands.
I fell in love with Notion
Notion is my savior. I have a page with my 2023 goals, my monthly goals, and a general list of things to do that are organized by importance, urgency, theme, and deadline if there’s one. I also created a side page to keep all the information I’ve learned from books, videos, courses, and podcasts.
I started documenting my journey
I take pictures of what I’m doing every day. When I’m having a healthy breakfast early in the morning, I take it. When I’m about to edit, write or translate something, I take it. When I’m reading a valuable book, I take it. When I finish exercising, I take it. I keep the photos on an album titled 2023. I want my future self to be able to look back at those pictures and remember exactly what I did every single day to get where I want to be. I think documenting your journey (you can take pictures, write a sentence before bed to sum up your day, record yourself, etc) helps keep you accountable as well. Taking pictures of my actions forces me to stop going through the motions in my day and actually look at what I’m doing on a daily basis. It forces me to stay committed to my plan.
I became a notebook hoarder
The dream life notebook
The first page of this notebook has my 2023 goals and the goals for the month I’m in. The second page is filled with pictures of my dream life and future achievements. I look at those pages every day, three times a day. In the morning before breakfast, in the afternoon after lunch (when I’m tempted to slack and do nothing at all), and before going to sleep. This way I constantly remind myself of what I truly want out of my life and what I have to do to get there.
The daily goals notebook
I also have a small notebook where I write, the day before, the three most important tasks I have to do the next day. This has been helping me immensely and reduced my tendency to procrastinate.
The inspiration notebook
The last notebook is filled with quotes I found beautiful and interesting. I collect words and my favorite passages from fiction books like they’re my precious little trinkets. It helps my creativity and the quality of my writing.
I made my goals public
It’s what I’m doing now. It’s another way to guilt trip me into commitment—to avoid the feeling of humiliation if I don’t follow through with my goals, to avoid turning my words into empty promises.
I got a support network
That’s one of the reasons I’m here. It’s important to surround yourself with like-minded people who can show you it’s possible to achieve whatever you want. Because we know most of our relatives and friends won’t understand this and won’t encourage us. I’m also fortunate that my mother is extremely supportive of my plans and believes in me. I think it’s great if you can get at least one person that believes you can do this. Someone that can say, “Pull yourself together!", when the journey gets tough.
That’s it for now. I plan to share my thoughts and how my journey’s going at least once a month. Thank you for reading!
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