Feeling scared a bit

[MightyBeast]

Hello. I hope you are doing well.

I started learning web development in July this year. I know basic html, CSS and javascript. This year and last year I was going through a lot of financial stress and childhood trauma. In August I worked for a friend who paid me like $50 for small website work. I live in a third world country (Kind of). I am currently studying and there are like 2 years left until I get my degree.

Last month I got another friend who is doing a startup and I am making website for his startup. I charged him $500 but he will pay me like $140 and If the startup generated revenue I will get rest of money.

My financial conditions are really poor right now. I wanted to study but last year I wasted my time learning android development which I could not learn properly. I also could not focus on my studies which degraded my grades. I wanted to make an app and market it. But i was not able to complete it. I left android development in between. Maybe it is an excuse but my internet connection was really poor. Some builds took like an hour long to finish and I was not good at java programming. I was also not persistent for long time. I saw no results and went desperate. I released an app on play store though. But i think relying on ads money was a mistake. And it requires a lot of marketing and app store optimization.

I need to do freelancing and generate some money to fix my life. So I am doing freelancing but my progress is really slow if I see. I am action faking I think. I read Lex's posts and watched his videos. They are great. But so far I have only one portfolio item. And I need to work on proposals a lot I think. I had sent some proposals on upwork (If i recall i sent only few which is clearly my fault). I got no responses and I needed quick work so I contacted my friends.

My goal is to get at least $1000 every month and If possible I want to take it to $2000 or more. But I am scared. I have self doubt. There is uncertainty and fear in my brain. If I failed what will happen. I may not even get any job after my studies. And I can not study now because of my stress. I day dream a lot. I need to work on my mindset and selling a lot I think. I want to get rid of this poverty.

My main questions are:
1. Is it possible (not easy or hard) to get to a point where I can reach those monthly goals? Are you able to sustain yourself or live happily doing freelancing? Is it possible to get there within 6 months span?
2. I know I gave up too early on upwork maybe. I will stick to it for longer for sure. How much time it took you to land your first job?
3. Do you get clients every month or there is considerable gap of months between your clients (This is my biggest fear that I may not get clients after any month and I may just end up doing nothing)

Any advice is highly appreciated.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

My goal is to get at least $1000 every month and If possible I want to take it to $2000 or more. But I am scared. I have self doubt. There is uncertainty and fear in my brain. If I failed what will happen. I may not even get any job after my studies. And I can not study now because of my stress. I day dream a lot. I need to work on my mindset and selling a lot I think. I want to get rid of this poverty.

Completely normal.

1. Is it possible (not easy or hard) to get to a point where I can reach those monthly goals? Are you able to sustain yourself or live happily doing freelancing? Is it possible to get there within 6 months span?

Yes, assuming you can reach a wider market than your area.

2. I know I gave up too early on upwork maybe. I will stick to it for longer for sure. How much time it took you to land your first job?

@Lex DeVille might be someone who you should read up on.

3. Do you get clients every month or there is considerable gap of months between your clients (This is my biggest fear that I may not get clients after any month and I may just end up doing nothing)

Freelancing can be feast or famine. So again, not unusual.

Welcome to the forum my friend.

 

[Tourmaline]

If you fail, then what will happen? What is the worst case?

 

[MightyBeast]

If you fail, then what will happen? What is the worst case?

The worst case scenario if i fail is that I'll be jobless and will not have money to support me and my family.

 

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[Tourmaline]

The worst case scenario if i fail is that I'll be jobless and will not have money to support me and my family.

Is that much worse that your position right now?

Do you have kids?

What I'm trying to get at is that the worst case is probably not that bad. If you failed, you would what? Either get a job and/or keep freelancing to make money. Presumably while you also figured out a fastlane business. But now look at the upside for if freelancing and business does go well!

 

[tylerwilkinson]

Is that much worse that your position right now?

Do you have kids?

What I'm trying to get at is that the worst case is probably not that bad. If you failed, you would what? Either get a job and/or keep freelancing to make money. Presumably while you also figured out a fastlane business. But now look at the upside for if freelancing and business does go well!

I’ve gotta echo this. If you don’t have enough freelance work to take up your time, you have time for other work or learning or self promotion. If I have all day for a job that only takes a couple hours, that’s when I might find a better way to do it. OR, I find another problem to potentially solve (sell).

 

[MightyBeast]

Thanks MJ sir. I appreciate your help and that you give your precious time to me. I'll be more disciplined and as you said freelancing can be feast or famine. I think I must start working on my second source of income also. I will work on it from today.

I’ve gotta echo this. If you don’t have enough freelance work to take up your time, you have time for other work or learning or self promotion. If I have all day for a job that only takes a couple hours, that’s when I might find a better way to do it. OR, I find another problem to potentially solve (sell).

It is right.
I gave my fear some thought process. What i realized was that if i do some corporate job, life is not simple or easy there too. There is politics, deadlines, fear of being fired and more. There is nothing in life that can not go wrong.

I started freelancing because I had to make money to support me and my family. When i started things were really worse. They still are. Maybe I need to focus more and realize how much action I need to take to fix things in my life.

What I have decided now is, that I will not judge everything very soon and will work hard to reach my goals in 6 months. I will not rush or stress for results and try to add maximum value that i can. I will work on some side income stream also. Maybe some content creation or something. I will update here If i get success or not.

Thank you MJ, Tourmaline, Tylorwilkinson for your precious advice and time.

 

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