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GOLD! The Only 3 Beliefs Holding You Back Right Now

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YacineLaid

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Oct 15, 2020
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Twice per day, I scroll through the forum. Occasionally I recognize patterns of thinking or behavior and I go through a little internal struggle: "do I respond to this question with a heartfelt response" or "should I just keep scrolling" -- I'll admit, I've been scrolling a lot more than responding lately so I figured I'd take a minute to give some unsolicited advice.

Your current results are a direct reflection of your belief systems.

That means the amount of money you have in your bank account today is not due to covid, the election, California burning, or how you were treated as a child... it is a culmination of your beliefs around money that you've held for the last 6 days, 6 weeks, 6 months, 6 years...

Beliefs like "should I save my money or spend it", "should I invest or not", "should I go all in on my business or do it part time", or "is this really even going to work?"

The "Covid 19" weight that people have gained wasn't because of the pandemic. It was because of your beliefs around exercising and eating healthy "should I work out or skip it", "what's healthy or unhealthy"

Relationships, too. "Should I be in one or not", "what should I accept in this relationship and what shouldn't I accept in this relationship"

If you aren't happy with your current results, here's my suggestion:

Identify and change your limiting beliefs.

Luckily, there's really only 3 types of limiting beliefs; hopeless, helpless, and worthless.

Hopeless Beliefs are the ones where somebody says "Just shut up, Steve. Nobody can make money in this economy. Nobody can build a business in this situation.
Relationships never last anyways.
My genetics won't allow me to get in shape.
This is bullshit, it can't be done!"

Helpless Beliefs are when someone says, "Easy for you to say. MJ can do it because he had a better idea.
They have more money than me.
They have more time than me.
They have less kids than me.
They have more hair than me.
That's why THEY can do it and I can't!"

Worthless Beliefs are where someone says, "Fine, fine. You're right. Everybody can make money. Everyone can have a long-lasting loving relationship. Everyone can have a great body... but if I'm being honest with you, man... I just don't think I deserve it. I don't think I'm worth it. I don't think if I made that money, I'd be able to keep it. I don't think if I got into that relationship, I could ever make them stay."

Can you see how devastating this psychology and these beliefs could be to someone's life and business?

For those of you who are here asking the questions over and over again like "should I go or stay", "should I invest or not", "should I start this business or put it off" -- my question for you is which one of these beliefs are really holding you back? ...And are they really true?

While I often spend hours helping people shift their beliefs, I can tell you exactly how to do it in very few words:

A belief is simply a feeling of absolute certainty you have about something.

If you didn't have certainty about that belief... you wouldn't believe it! You just feel like it's true. (And man it really does FEEL real, doesn't it?)

To change a limiting belief, simply start by figuring out what the belief is, then create doubt in it. Ask the question "is this belief really true?" and "are there examples of someone in my situation that made it work anyways?" or "have I even succeeded at this in the past and maybe I'm just overthinking it, now?"

I'm more than willing to help but I think it would be even more valuable for you and the whole forum -- if you're up for it -- to post an old belief you held in the past... and then what changed it for you? How do you see it now?

As an example... growing up, I truly believed money was scarce and extremely hard to come by. The first real shift in that mindset was coming here on the forum and meeting really successful people who started with nothing. When they spoke about how easy it was to make money, it really created doubt in that belief. "Maybe it ISN'T so tough... I'm just making it a bigger deal than it really is..."

Today when I look at how much money is in the system (especially here in the U.S. with another 2 TRILLION dollars floating around), I can't help but think "wow, it really is everywhere and people have no problem spending it!"

What is it for you? What shifted? What changed?
It isn't that easy to change the beliefs even with consciousness and certitude that it's not helping you. It needs discipline and repetition every damn day until it change. Cause even if you think you're believing in something new emotion aren't there. And the subconscious keep working with the old one's. The better and the fastest way is to start by meditation learn to calm and relax your mind and reading some books that helps like (limitless Jim kwik ) the miracle morning hal Elrod .napoleon hill ( law of success , think and grow rich ...etc) and than having and everyday plan. And by time you'll feel your beliefs changing, and by time you become a new version of your self that make you get more health wealth love and happiness....
And this will be your new lifestyle reading books doing meditation and affirmations visualising and then working smarter and having more energy and money to invest in your dreams that nourish your beliefs your purpose your life it's not that hard if you get the real attention to do it for a lifetime it will be hard just like the first week and the end of the week you'll start feeling better and you feel it really inside you that's enough to push you trought .
Sorry if I did some mistakes in language I'm just becoming bilingual for like months. I'm from Algeria and the second language in my country is French so I'm still developing my English skill.
Wish you'll health wealth love and happiness
 

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Outdoorlife2005

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Oct 10, 2020
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what an awesome post
Spot on

this post screams me all over it. I’m not where I am due to me. I haven’t wanted it bad enough. (As I finally realized) after a tragic event it has woken me up

I’m so glad I came across the millionaire Fastlane book and now this forum. I’m taking action daily and it feels so good. I’ve had so many bad habits (spending ones) and after writing them down and looking at them daily I am so disappointed with myself for how stupid I’ve been the last few years. I have a solid game plan and plucking away at it daily until I reach my next goal
 

Katherine

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For those of you who are parents , what beliefs will you impart to your children now? I certainly want my children to have a good head start.

I certainly don't want to pass on my helpless belief! Thanks @Kung Fu Steve for the wonderful post!
 

BizyDad

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For those of you who are parents , what beliefs will you impart to your children now? I certainly want my children to have a good head start.

I certainly don't want to pass on my helpless belief! Thanks @Kung Fu Steve for the wonderful post!
I find myself saying these kinds of things often:

You can do it.
Keep trying.
You can figure it out.
Talk to your brother/sister and figure it out together.

They also have chores. No reward, no allowance, they are expected to do their chores because we all have duties and responsibilities.

And I ask them often, "What do you think?" Whether it's about what we're going to do today, or what to eat, or what just read together, or how to accomplish something, I solicit their opinion often. Not always, they still know Dad's the boss, but I want to encourage them to think for themselves. If they don't have an opinion, I encourage them to think it over.

I also encourage a lot of reading, which helps show them what is possible.
 

Luis Weiland

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Oct 13, 2020
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GOLD.

How can we be proactive as possible with belief change?
Are there any practices you would recommend?
As he said, the fastest way is to start by meditation learn to calm and relax your mind. I have 2 years of experience. Is there anything you would like to know?
 

Katherine

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I find myself saying these kinds of things often:

You can do it.
Keep trying.
You can figure it out.
Talk to your brother/sister and figure it out together.

They also have chores. No reward, no allowance, they are expected to do their chores because we all have duties and responsibilities.

And I ask them often, "What do you think?" Whether it's about what we're going to do today, or what to eat, or what just read together, or how to accomplish something, I solicit their opinion often. Not always, they still know Dad's the boss, but I want to encourage them to think for themselves. If they don't have an opinion, I encourage them to think it over.

I also encourage a lot of reading, which helps show them what is possible.

Thanks @BizyDad for sharing!

I find myself projecting the positive beliefs and mindset to my kids (because I want them to be better or ready to fight against any self doubts and negative situation when arises )....

Which brings to my next point .... (ironically) and at the same time struggling on my own and to my dismay accidentally projecting those struggles on them time to time. Wonder these make sense to some of you.

Going to be pretty vulnerable here... so here are some beliefs
- I am not that good / fantastic ... (fake humility)
- Poor money management
- I should be always on guard and be on hard on myself ... because taking it easy means I will fall off the wagon and lose everything.
- I am slow.... not fast enough...
- People are not willingly to spend $ .... hence closing sales is difficult
- Terrible mother .... terrible parenting
- I want to do more but i can't because the kids are taking up my time ... I felt incapable ...
- My clients are the old school kind, they are not open! (so ironic....)

I think i can go on forever .... oh dear :/
 

BizyDad

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I'll let others speak more to your mindset stuff. For me, I'd just say don't be too hard on yourself. None of these things are as bad, or as insurmountable, as they seem. Some are probably flat out false.

If anyone is interested in the kid talk, there's this recent thread (so we don't hijack this one): OFF-TOPIC - How to instill hard-working values in my kids
 

Kung Fu Steve

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When I started, and even now, I still struggle with these limiting beliefs. Back about 90% of my income comes from abroad and 10% local. Now, it's a reverse 90% local, 10% abroad. I just keep managing them and moving on.

Finding better deals in my local country is difficult.
Getting local people to pay for deals is slow and slow.. and this slows up operation.
Looks like I sell lower than most of my competitors in the US/UK.
Other people are finding better deals because they live in better markets.

All beliefs are true (to you).

There's really only 3 things that hold people back in business:

1.) The emotional state that they're in (unresourceful, sad, frustrated, upset, angry, depressed -- these all generate poor decisions and become cyclical).

2.) The strategy they're using (the specific actions they are doing to achieve the goal)

3.) The story they're telling themselves (these beliefs you just referenced)

I'm curious, why did you switch to local if abroad was working so well? Why not start your agency and do more work abroad?

How many people have you spoke to in order to develop the belief "local people are slow"?

When you say better deals, are you just talking about money? Or are the clients less demanding? Easier to sell? What is it?


My first target is to dominate my local market... and become a local champion...create more jobs for lots of young people here and then scale to Nigeria and South Africa. Yet, I still had to deal with these limiting beliefs if I want to get there.

I had spent this weekend reading MJ's Millionaire Fastlane to also get some help there as well. Please, can you offer some help to deal with these silly limiting beliefs?

Great goal!

You no longer have to limit yourself to Africa, though.

Your income will only be capped by your creativity.

I would question your goal simply because it's not very concrete. What does it mean to be a local champion? Does it mean you have to employ the whole country? Does that mean 5 people? Does that mean everyone has to chant your name in the streets?

The reason I would question the goal is going back to your original statement about how you were making good money with U.S. clients and then decided to stop doing that and start doing something else (don't worry, MOST business owners make this mistake -- me, too).

When you find something that's working, double down on that!
 

Kung Fu Steve

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It isn't that easy to change the beliefs even with consciousness and certitude that it's not helping you. It needs discipline and repetition every damn day until it change. Cause even if you think you're believing in something new emotion aren't there. And the subconscious keep working with the old one's. The better and the fastest way is to start by meditation learn to calm and relax your mind and reading some books that helps like (limitless Jim kwik ) the miracle morning hal Elrod .napoleon hill ( law of success , think and grow rich ...etc) and than having and everyday plan. And by time you'll feel your beliefs changing, and by time you become a new version of your self that make you get more health wealth love and happiness....
And this will be your new lifestyle reading books doing meditation and affirmations visualising and then working smarter and having more energy and money to invest in your dreams that nourish your beliefs your purpose your life it's not that hard if you get the real attention to do it for a lifetime it will be hard just like the first week and the end of the week you'll start feeling better and you feel it really inside you that's enough to push you trought .
Sorry if I did some mistakes in language I'm just becoming bilingual for like months. I'm from Algeria and the second language in my country is French so I'm still developing my English skill.
Wish you'll health wealth love and happiness

Here's a philosophical question for you: what if it were easy to change beliefs?

All change happens in a moment.

Most people say it takes forever to change. Not true. It took forever for someone to get to the point where it was a must for them.

For a belief to change, you must first believe:

1.) It MUST change NOW
2.) I CAN change it NOW
3.) I MUST change it NOW

A little more detail:

1.) I am going to receive massive and immediate pain if it I don't change right now, and massive immediate pleasure if I change right now.

2.) I (not someone else will change it for me) am the one who can (it's possible to change) change it now (not sometime in the future).

3.) I (me) MUST (pain/pleasure) change it NOW (immediately)

If you get all three of those, your belief changes in one second. It doesn't take 27 years sitting on a couch talking to some professional about your mother and your father.

It doesn't take meditating and thinking about it.

In fact, I would say do NOT sit down and think about it because you will put yourself in a physiologically down state where you'll be less resourceful, less focused, less positive. STAND UP. MOVE.

You can't think your way out of something you acted yourself into.

GOLD.

How can we be proactive as possible with belief change?
Are there any practices you would recommend?

When you catch yourself saying something that you know is bullshit -- call yourself out BEFORE you stack on the references.

"See that's why nobody loves me" -- wait. Stop. Bullshit.

"Always, Never, Everybody, and Nobody" are always followed by complete and utter bullshit.

All beliefs are held up by references.

"I'm sexy because when I was 16 and stopped at a stop light some pretty girls turned and smiled at me"

Probably were looking at me stuffing my face and laughing -- but because I created the meaning in my head that I'm sexy, that's what I stick with.

But if you find yourself going down that rabbit hole in a negative way, make your move, change your physiology, and tell the truth :)

As he said, the fastest way is to start by meditation learn to calm and relax your mind. I have 2 years of experience. Is there anything you would like to know?

Nah.

There's a lot of benefit to meditation and relaxing your mind.

Milton Erickson was the greatest hypnotherapist of all time... but I have a hard time re-producing his results.


I'd just say don't be too hard on yourself. None of these things are as bad, or as insurmountable, as they seem. Some are probably flat out false.

Probably the best statement in this entire thread!
 

Wil22

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I've never met a drug dealer making more than 60k/year.

60k WAS a lot of money in my neighborhood... but it was silly.

There's a silly quote from "Get rich or die trying" with 50 cent where he realized while selling crack on the corner all day every day he was making less than minimum wage based on the amount of hours he was out there. Not to mention the risk.
Funny when you actually do the math, income, expenses, profit and unrealized mental stress, 60k is nothing. But in a small community, millions.
 

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Kung Fu Steve

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Yeah I definitely don't have those limiting beliefs. I believe I had, but several books this year changed my perspective.

Maybe I should've said "the only 3 categories of beliefs" ... but that wouldn't be accurate either because technically there are 7 types...

Global Beliefs -- "People are... men are.. women are... relationships are... money is... time is..."

Identity Beliefs -- Who are you? Who are you not? Who are your role models? How are you like them? How are you not like them?

Value -- What's important to you about business? What about health? relationship? What's something you'd do anything to get in life? What's something you'd do anything to avoid in life?

Rules -- Must, must not, must never, must always, should, should not, should always, should never, can, cannot, can never, will, will not, will never, will always, is, is not

Vehicles -- How do you meet certainty/security, variety/adventure, significance/importance, love/connection

Situation Specific -- "cheating on my significant other is wrong ... unless..." or "I would never lie... but sometimes you have to tell a little white lie..." or "I would never kill someone unless"

Metaprograms -- VAKOG
 

Katherine

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CaptainAmerica

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Great stuff!

I used to have all kinds of nonsense pushing me around, from 'rich people are bad' to 'I don't deserve anything good'. Foolishness.

What changed was a big 2x4 of reality hitting me upside the head:

- people get rich all the time in ways that have nothing to do with their personality (the nice but dumb kid from high school made bank in real estate)
- money isn't always a result of effort (one of my good friends happened to marry into a shoe empire)
- I have a chronic condition, so my good days have to be fulfilling to make up for my bad days
- if I ruminate on my condition, I'll have more bad days

My beliefs about these things used to be counter to reality. I've gotten much better at seeing the thing itself is what counts, not what I believe to be true about it.
 

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