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GOLD! The Only 3 Beliefs Holding You Back Right Now

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danwan337

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Twice per day, I scroll through the forum. Occasionally I recognize patterns of thinking or behavior and I go through a little internal struggle: "do I respond to this question with a heartfelt response" or "should I just keep scrolling" -- I'll admit, I've been scrolling a lot more than responding lately so I figured I'd take a minute to give some unsolicited advice.

Your current results are a direct reflection of your belief systems.

That means the amount of money you have in your bank account today is not due to covid, the election, California burning, or how you were treated as a child... it is a culmination of your beliefs around money that you've held for the last 6 days, 6 weeks, 6 months, 6 years...

Beliefs like "should I save my money or spend it", "should I invest or not", "should I go all in on my business or do it part time", or "is this really even going to work?"

The "Covid 19" weight that people have gained wasn't because of the pandemic. It was because of your beliefs around exercising and eating healthy "should I work out or skip it", "what's healthy or unhealthy"

Relationships, too. "Should I be in one or not", "what should I accept in this relationship and what shouldn't I accept in this relationship"

If you aren't happy with your current results, here's my suggestion:

Identify and change your limiting beliefs.

Luckily, there's really only 3 types of limiting beliefs; hopeless, helpless, and worthless.

Hopeless Beliefs are the ones where somebody says "Just shut up, Steve. Nobody can make money in this economy. Nobody can build a business in this situation. Relationships never last anyways. My genetics won't allow me to get in shape. This is bullshit, it can't be done!"

Helpless Beliefs are when someone says, "Easy for you to say. MJ can do it because he had a better idea. They have more money than me. They have more time than me. They have less kids than me. They have more hair than me. That's why THEY can do it and I can't!"

Worthless Beliefs are where someone says, "Fine, fine. You're right. Everybody can make money. Everyone can have a long-lasting loving relationship. Everyone can have a great body... but if I'm being honest with you, man... I just don't think I deserve it. I don't think I'm worth it. I don't think if I made that money, I'd be able to keep it. I don't think if I got into that relationship, I could ever make them stay."

Can you see how devastating this psychology and these beliefs could be to someone's life and business?

For those of you who are here asking the questions over and over again like "should I go or stay", "should I invest or not", "should I start this business or put it off" -- my question for you is which one of these beliefs are really holding you back? ...And are they really true?

While I often spend hours helping people shift their beliefs, I can tell you exactly how to do it in very few words:

A belief is simply a feeling of absolute certainty you have about something.

If you didn't have certainty about that belief... you wouldn't believe it! You just feel like it's true. (And man it really does FEEL real, doesn't it?)

To change a limiting belief, simply start by figuring out what the belief is, then create doubt in it. Ask the question "is this belief really true?" and "are there examples of someone in my situation that made it work anyways?" or "have I even succeeded at this in the past and maybe I'm just overthinking it, now?"

I'm more than willing to help but I think it would be even more valuable for you and the whole forum -- if you're up for it -- to post an old belief you held in the past... and then what changed it for you? How do you see it now?

As an example... growing up, I truly believed money was scarce and extremely hard to come by. The first real shift in that mindset was coming here on the forum and meeting really successful people who started with nothing. When they spoke about how easy it was to make money, it really created doubt in that belief. "Maybe it ISN'T so tough... I'm just making it a bigger deal than it really is..."

Today when I look at how much money is in the system (especially here in the U.S. with another 2 TRILLION dollars floating around), I can't help but think "wow, it really is everywhere and people have no problem spending it!"

What is it for you? What shifted? What changed?

Great stuff, Steve. I used to fear for my job every time I realize and thought over it many times. If I don't have a job, the worst thing will happen, I will be broke or even go down the streets, but still, that can't shift my confidence or change the inner me. Now, I give the same advice to people. Love what you are doing but don't fear of losing your job
 

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BlackMagician

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What I see in the forums is a lot of people focused on MINDSET, I'm going to do this bla bla bla, but they never do anything, and in many cases NOT because of mindset, but because they lack KNOWLEDGE. They simply do NOT take the time required to get the KNOWLEDGE that they need.... which requires a LOT of time and effort. Most people don't want to put in the work... there's NOTHING more to it than that. They want the success, but not the work. They want to succeed while remaining dumbasses who can't even tell right from left...

I am VERY knowledgeable. I have put lots of time and effort to acquire knowledge. I am still not successful.
anything you want to add?

If you gain the knowledge, let me tell you - it's only a matter of time before you'll succeed and before your mindset will improve and everything.
Sorry buddy, but knowledge means nothing. Knowledge is power? no. The implementation of that knowledge is Power.
Why most people have the knowledge to change their life but still not implement? because of limited belief and mindset issue.
What's that? Think more about limiting beliefs.

One of my client, who already has 2 exits with 600 Crore INR (6Billion INR) says, one of the key factors between those who do Million and Billion is Mindset and beliefs.
No, he doesn't run an agency with 6 figures. He has multiple businesses with 7+ figures and that's his advice. He is a nice guy BTW. Very friendly.

I am not talking bad about you here. Just that, from the way you posted, I smell full of 'ME' thought that 'YOU' are right.
You may be right, you may be wrong. That's the mindset we should have. Agree to disagree?

Why i care to reply? because i have always been knowledgeable and put time and efforts to achieve the required knowledge but never succeed. After joining this forum, only 1 thing changed and my life took a turn. Guess what? Beliefs.

Hope i was not rude with my words above. I am not good with English accent so i am sorry if my words felt rude.

Open to discuss in private. lets not flood this Gold advice thread.
 

Simon Angel

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Me and my impostor syndrome feel personally attacked.

Jk.

I'm made of limiting beliefs! But it's funny because putting them into words it hard. Let me try.

I am smart but I'm not street smart. (Limiting Belief) Every time someone is like "omg easy peasy, I just called the dude and said "Hi I wanna do business" and they were like "cool, pitch me" and now I've got a 10 M client" I think.. I can't do that. That's not the way you approach business (Limiting Belief). That's just a one-off. Except everyone here seems to do it except for me.

"Businessmen" are always like, 40+ y/o men that just see me as a baby. A baby woman. Ready to throw me off a cliff, or flirting material. I feel inferior, intimidated and less knowledgable than an older person and don't feel worthy of selling anything to them. (Limiting Belief, happened a lot at the bank trying to sell investment accounts) this kinda goes with the last one. It's difficult for a woman to fit in a room full of men and earn respect without being called "too intense" "witch" etc.

I don't have what it takes to hustle. It's not who I am. I can pretend for a few days but that's about it. I'm brain-scattered, my meds make me slower and less sharp. I'm slowly becoming more stupid. I'll probably have early dementia. I procrastinate out of fear of failure.

I'm lazy.

TL;DR : I'm a mess.

The ones that have shifted:

I've become much less of a people pleaser though, and learnt to put myself first and say "no". I used to believe I had to be a doormat and everyone had to like me. Now I don't GAF about certain people.

I did always hold the belief that if someone is doing something out there, there's no reason I'm not capable of it. So when my mom said "life is like this" I've always (internally) disagreed. Life couldn't be that helpless. She has learned helplessness, by the way.

I used to think I needed my dad's validation cause he never gave me the time of day. Now IDGAF. I do my thing. Funny enough I've earned his respect nowadays, although I can't pinpoint why.

I blacklist people much quicker now. I've learnt the "people tell you who they are if you listen" lesson and save myself a lot of headaches.

Stop saying and thinking this and it's no longer real. You're in full control of your thoughts and beliefs, and your thoughts and beliefs are the creators of your reality. Let go of the past, it let you go so why do you cling onto it? Become hyper-aware of the present now, wipe out the limiting thoughts and beliefs NOW and witness your true potential. You are now free to do and be anything you want.
 

Vadim26

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Posts like this are one of the reasons I keep coming back to this forum.
Saved, bookmarked, shared.

Seriously, how is this not GOLD yet?!
 

BellaPippin

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Stop saying and thinking this and it's no longer real. You're in full control of your thoughts and beliefs, and your thoughts and beliefs are the creators of your reality. Let go of the past, it let you go so why do you cling onto it? Become hyper-aware of the present now, wipe out the limiting thoughts and beliefs NOW and witness your true potential. You are now free to do and be anything you want.

I try!! It's pretty carved in my brain so I'm working on creating and establishing the better thought patterns. I have some days when I wake up and I feel indestructible and some other days where I just can't put 2 and 2 together. I'm slowly getting better at catching BS automatic thinking and challenging it.

The good thing is deep down, I always know I can do what I set my mind to. I'll never say "I wish I hadn't made this mistake". Takes me like 3x the time but I've done everything I've set my mind to so far, since that first goal of saving as a teen to spend a couple years abroad, to finally getting a property. If for some reason I find an obstacle is just keeping me stuck I'll come up with something to go around it.

Thanks Simon :)
 

MJ DeMarco

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Just to add to this thread and how a belief shift can radically alter a life...

Growing up, as many of you know, I thought getting rich quick (and young) was reserved for celebrities, athletes, and musicians. This was not possible for "normal people" especially if you had no interest in acting, dribbling, or playing guitar.

But then I met that young guy in the expensive sports car who planted the seed for entrepreneurship.

Then the belief became... getting rich young could happen for celebrities, athletes, musicians, and entrepreneurs.

The rest is history.

Because one belief underwent a minor shift.
 

MoneyDoc

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Just to add to this thread and how a belief shift can radically alter a life...

Growing up, as many of you know, I thought getting rich quick (and young) was reserved for celebrities, athletes, and musicians. This was not possible for "normal people" especially if you had no interest in acting, dribbling, or playing guitar.

But then I met that young guy in the expensive sports car who planted the seed for entrepreneurship.

Then the belief became... getting rich young could happen for celebrities, athletes, musicians, and entrepreneurs.

The rest is history.

Because one belief underwent a minor shift.
Don't forget drug dealers lol..

When I was 13-14, every time I would see a Ferrari or Lamborghini, my parents would be like "doctor or drug dealer".

I don't blame them though... they've never met people like Moiz Ali who sold a deodorant brand for $100m or John Doe who makes $2m/year with his dog brand.
 

Kung Fu Steve

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Don't forget drug dealers lol..

When I was 13-14, every time I would see a Ferrari or Lamborghini, my parents would be like "doctor or drug dealer".

I don't blame them though... they've never met people like Moiz Ali who sold a deodorant brand for $100m or John Doe who makes $2m/year with his dog brand.

I've never met a drug dealer making more than 60k/year.

60k WAS a lot of money in my neighborhood... but it was silly.

There's a silly quote from "Get rich or die trying" with 50 cent where he realized while selling crack on the corner all day every day he was making less than minimum wage based on the amount of hours he was out there. Not to mention the risk.
 

Kevin88660

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Identify and change your limiting beliefs.

Luckily, there's really only 3 types of limiting beliefs; hopeless, helpless, and worthless.

Hopeless Beliefs are the ones where somebody says "Just shut up, Steve. Nobody can make money in this economy. Nobody can build a business in this situation.
Relationships never last anyways.
My genetics won't allow me to get in shape.
This is bullshit, it can't be done!"

Helpless Beliefs are when someone says, "Easy for you to say. MJ can do it because he had a better idea.
They have more money than me.
They have more time than me.
They have less kids than me.
They have more hair than me.
That's why THEY can do it and I can't!"

Worthless Beliefs are where someone says, "Fine, fine. You're right. Everybody can make money. Everyone can have a long-lasting loving relationship. Everyone can have a great body... but if I'm being honest with you, man... I just don't think I deserve it. I don't think I'm worth it. I don't think if I made that money, I'd be able to keep it. I don't think if I got into that relationship, I could ever make them stay."

Can you see how devastating this psychology and these beliefs could be to someone's life and business?

For those of you who are here asking the questions over and over again like "should I go or stay", "should I invest or not", "should I start this business or put it off" -- my question for you is which one of these beliefs are really holding you back? ...And are they really true?

While I often spend hours helping people shift their beliefs, I can tell you exactly how to do it in very few words:

A belief is simply a feeling of absolute certainty you have about something.

If you didn't have certainty about that belief... you wouldn't believe it! You just feel like it's true. (And man it really does FEEL real, doesn't it?)

To change a limiting belief, simply start by figuring out what the belief is, then create doubt in it. Ask the question "is this belief really true?" and "are there examples of someone in my situation that made it work anyways?" or "have I even succeeded at this in the past and maybe I'm just overthinking it, now?"

I'm more than willing to help but I think it would be even more valuable for you and the whole forum -- if you're up for it -- to post an old belief you held in the past... and then what changed it for you? How do you see it now?

As an example... growing up, I truly believed money was scarce and extremely hard to come by. The first real shift in that mindset was coming here on the forum and meeting really successful people who started with nothing. When they spoke about how easy it was to make money, it really created doubt in that belief. "Maybe it ISN'T so tough... I'm just making it a bigger deal than it really is..."

Today when I look at how much money is in the system (especially here in the U.S. with another 2 TRILLION dollars floating around), I can't help but think "wow, it really is everywhere and people have no problem spending it!"

What is it for you? What shifted? What changed?
I think it is that reading biographies of successful people I realized that you do not need to be super genius or be super capable in multiple aspects to be a successful business person.

Successful people continue to say stupid things and screw up things just like many other people. They are mortals just like us. Just be laser focused on really important things, and when the opportunity comes give your 200%.
 

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mon_fi

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Beliefs lead to actions, so it is still more about actions than about beliefs. You can take action while not believing, and it works. You hear many people starting something then saying "I would have never believed it'd become that big."
 

AshleysBliss

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Great post. One of my limiting beliefs was that I had poor genetics and wouldn’t be able to lose weight that I put on over the years. A couple of years ago I changed that limiting belief and my mindset and lost over 70 pounds last year.
 

Kung Fu Steve

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Great post. One of my limiting beliefs was that I had poor genetics and wouldn’t be able to lose weight that I put on over the years. A couple of years ago I changed that limiting belief and my mindset and lost over 70 pounds last year.

What a freaking rockstar!
 

ExaltedLife

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If you and I were to sit down and have a conversation, I'd ask some pointed questions. "How are you performing in (certain area)? Scale of 1-10?"

I've worked with enough people to know that most people who rate themselves lower tend to be the high achievers. The people who always want more but never think they're doing good enough. Then the people who rate themselves higher tend to be the type of over-confident people who are in a comfort zone and have little to no desire to more

** This is a gross overgeneralization but it gives me a starting point with someone **

Then I'd ask about your goals "what's a level 10 look like? where do you want to be?"

And then a pretty intense question "why don't you already have this? what's holding you back?"

We can easily come up with an entire list:

I don't have the...

time, money, knowledge, energy, support, etc. etc. etc.

( just responded above with the "IF, THEN, MEANS" frame because when people simply say I don't have the time -- that's not a complete belief... probably more accurate is something like:

If I have kids, then I don't have the time to workout, which means I'll never be in good shape. I should just accept that.

If I don't go to business school, then I won't have the knowledge I need, which means I'll never succeed in business. I shouldn't even try.

Again, I'm being obnoxious but here's the simple way:

1. What's an area of your life you're doing well in... why? What makes you good in that area? How do you think about it? What habits or routines have you built? (You'll find some empowering beliefs)

2. What's an area of your life you're NOT thrilled in... why? What stops you from making progress? What has to be done in order to progress? What are you not doing or following through on? Why? (you'll find some limiting beliefs)




Wow -- this is a fantastic list!

Nobody consciously woke up this morning and see "gee, I can't want to fear failure today!"

All of these beliefs are conditioned. Which is great... because they can be reconditioned!

What's the difference between the times when we face a challenge and breakthrough versus the times when we end up feeling helpless and the problem lingers?

Whenever we find ourselves feeling helpless or unable to improve a situation, it’s because we have fallen into learned helplessness.

In learned helplessness, these 3 P's show up:

1. PERVASIVE: We think that because our finances are destroyed that our whole life is ruined. It’s not true, we have our health, our relationships, and tons of other things. It’s not pervasive, but sometimes we react as if it is.

2. PERMANENT: No problem is permanent. When things are good we think they will be good forever. When things are bad, we feel like it will be bad forever. Neither one is true. Life has seasons. We ALL go through Winters and we all eventually get to Spring. Nothing is permanent, life is constant change.

3. PERSONAL: We think it’s us. If we were smarter, prettier, stronger, if we lived over there, if we had this family, if we were taller, thinner, richer, then we wouldn’t be in this situation. We all do this. We take it personally and think that somehow, if we were XYZ (good enough) we would magically not have these “problems”. It’s not you, it’s not personal. Problems are a part of life. (Suffering is optional)

Any time you think your problem is all 3 of these things we get in that funk of "why even bother".

What if -- just for a second -- you thought the opposite of each of these beliefs? Are there plenty of references and evidence to support the opposite?

Finding deals around "my" expensive market is difficult.

What if it didn't matter how expensive a property was... what if it mattered what the ROI would be?

Other people are finding deals because they live in better markets.

What if they have a disadvantage because they DO live in better markets and can't find the deals you can?

It's very competitive and I don't stand a chance.

What if it's all bluster and most of these people just talk a good game? What if you were the right person for the job?

Others know more than me and already have a head start.

What if it's not how you start, it's how you end up?

Am I getting into real estate investing at the wrong time just before a recession starts or a real estate crash begins?

What are ways you can invest while preparing for a dip?

Am I going to lose everything and uproot my family?

Nope! ... but even if you did... would that be so bad? Or would that start a brand new chapter of your life?

Am I going to burst into a ball of flames?

I don't see this happening anytime soon... do you work with fireworks?

Am I fighting an uphill battle?

Not if you're going in a different direction ...

Do you know any good books by Martin Seligman?
 

Kung Fu Steve

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Do you know any good books by Martin Seligman?

That completely depends on what you're looking for!

I don't ever recommend doing what I did and slog through the (text)books. His are simpler than a Milton Erickson or a Richard Bandler but you don't need to understand the roots to pick the fruit.

Are you a psychologist, psychiatrist, or coach?

If not, I wouldn't really bother.

Tony Robbins is by far the number one person on the planet to teach practical psychology to the general public. You want useable stuff for today? Yeah. He's it.

Otherwise you're going to study for years before you get the details of change and why it works/why it doesn't.
 

Fiza Hanif

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@Kung Fu Steve What a thread man! Thank you so much for sharing this information...
I'm from a country and "society" where everyone is indoctrinated from the moment he/she is born and where questioning and critical thinking is next to impossible because everyone is following the same financial and spiritual path and thus getting the same results. Growing up I had A LOT of beliefs that I have questioned consistently in the last 2 years all thanks to some individuals that are making a huge impact on many lives through their work. Some of them are motivational/inspirational speakers, like Sandeep Maheshwari from India, others are authors, like MJ.

In my first year of college, I read "The Untethered Soul" by Michael A. Singer. Then one of my friends recommended me MJ's books. So I read "Unscripted". These two books changed the way I saw and understood the world around me and myself. From that point today I'm constantly learning and questioning everything.

Before questioning my beliefs I was a frustrated student preparing to fit in the "system". Now I am a web designer helping companies to get online easily and successfully. I have become more visionary, free, and peaceful after changing my belief system.

I have changed a lot in the last 2 years just because I exposed myself to different information and started questioning everything. I continue doing that.

So critical thinking and questioning your beliefs is crucial to living life on your own terms and get different results from the crowd.

Before changing my belief system: I'm a girl, so I can do limited things in my life.
After changing my belief system: I'm a human being with a lot of abilities and capabilities to help others and make an impact on others and on my own life.

Thanks again @Kung Fu Steve for writing on this topic. It is very relevant to all of us.
 

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Twice per day, I scroll through the forum. Occasionally I recognize patterns of thinking or behavior and I go through a little internal struggle: "do I respond to this question with a heartfelt response" or "should I just keep scrolling" -- I'll admit, I've been scrolling a lot more than responding lately so I figured I'd take a minute to give some unsolicited advice.

Your current results are a direct reflection of your belief systems.

That means the amount of money you have in your bank account today is not due to covid, the election, California burning, or how you were treated as a child... it is a culmination of your beliefs around money that you've held for the last 6 days, 6 weeks, 6 months, 6 years...

Beliefs like "should I save my money or spend it", "should I invest or not", "should I go all in on my business or do it part time", or "is this really even going to work?"

The "Covid 19" weight that people have gained wasn't because of the pandemic. It was because of your beliefs around exercising and eating healthy "should I work out or skip it", "what's healthy or unhealthy"

Relationships, too. "Should I be in one or not", "what should I accept in this relationship and what shouldn't I accept in this relationship"

If you aren't happy with your current results, here's my suggestion:

Identify and change your limiting beliefs.

Luckily, there's really only 3 types of limiting beliefs; hopeless, helpless, and worthless.

Hopeless Beliefs are the ones where somebody says "Just shut up, Steve. Nobody can make money in this economy. Nobody can build a business in this situation.
Relationships never last anyways.
My genetics won't allow me to get in shape.
This is bullshit, it can't be done!"

Helpless Beliefs are when someone says, "Easy for you to say. MJ can do it because he had a better idea.
They have more money than me.
They have more time than me.
They have less kids than me.
They have more hair than me.
That's why THEY can do it and I can't!"

Worthless Beliefs are where someone says, "Fine, fine. You're right. Everybody can make money. Everyone can have a long-lasting loving relationship. Everyone can have a great body... but if I'm being honest with you, man... I just don't think I deserve it. I don't think I'm worth it. I don't think if I made that money, I'd be able to keep it. I don't think if I got into that relationship, I could ever make them stay."

Can you see how devastating this psychology and these beliefs could be to someone's life and business?

For those of you who are here asking the questions over and over again like "should I go or stay", "should I invest or not", "should I start this business or put it off" -- my question for you is which one of these beliefs are really holding you back? ...And are they really true?

While I often spend hours helping people shift their beliefs, I can tell you exactly how to do it in very few words:

A belief is simply a feeling of absolute certainty you have about something.

If you didn't have certainty about that belief... you wouldn't believe it! You just feel like it's true. (And man it really does FEEL real, doesn't it?)

To change a limiting belief, simply start by figuring out what the belief is, then create doubt in it. Ask the question "is this belief really true?" and "are there examples of someone in my situation that made it work anyways?" or "have I even succeeded at this in the past and maybe I'm just overthinking it, now?"

I'm more than willing to help but I think it would be even more valuable for you and the whole forum -- if you're up for it -- to post an old belief you held in the past... and then what changed it for you? How do you see it now?

As an example... growing up, I truly believed money was scarce and extremely hard to come by. The first real shift in that mindset was coming here on the forum and meeting really successful people who started with nothing. When they spoke about how easy it was to make money, it really created doubt in that belief. "Maybe it ISN'T so tough... I'm just making it a bigger deal than it really is..."

Today when I look at how much money is in the system (especially here in the U.S. with another 2 TRILLION dollars floating around), I can't help but think "wow, it really is everywhere and people have no problem spending it!"

What is it for you? What shifted? What changed?
So, it's going to be a bit meta, but here is one belief I'd like to be challenged:
I believe that beliefs (no matter justified or erroneous) are imprinted on you either by experience or your environment. Which means I'm not sure people can truly change their beliefs just by reading a statement contrary to a belief they currently hold.

Not trying to discredit your post, it's a great insight in itself. I'm just wondering whether passing this message, in this form, can truly help some people, or if it's a waste of time because either people already believe what you believe, or they don't, and thus can't change their belief just by reading a message on a forum.

The latter would be my belief, although the more mature I get, the more open to changing my beliefs I am.
 

Kung Fu Steve

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So, it's going to be a bit meta, but here is one belief I'd like to be challenged:
I believe that beliefs (no matter justified or erroneous) are imprinted on you either by experience or your environment. Which means I'm not sure people can truly change their beliefs just by reading a statement contrary to a belief they currently hold.

Not trying to discredit your post, it's a great insight in itself. I'm just wondering whether passing this message, in this form, can truly help some people, or if it's a waste of time because either people already believe what you believe, or they don't, and thus can't change their belief just by reading a message on a forum.

The latter would be my belief, although the more mature I get, the more open to changing my beliefs I am.

Funny you mention this. Stanford University did a psychological study some 8-9 years ago and found that for the average human being 60% of your beliefs, habits, patterns were formed by the age of 5.

By the age of 18, closer to 100%. Your beliefs are not really your beliefs. At least, very few of them. Your parents, your teachers, your friends, your environment all had a hand in conditioning you one way or the other.

But the truth is, they are not imprinted, they are conditioned. Which means they can be re-conditioned.

And you're right -- most people can't simply change their beliefs by reading one of my dumb posts... but I'm curious... have you ever changed a belief? What triggered it? What was the moment? Was it a book you read? A movie you saw? A significant life event? When you had kids? When you got married? When you moved? Started a business? What was the trigger for you to stop thinking one thing, and start thinking another?

You've already changed beliefs thousands of times since childhood. Hell at one point we believed Santa was a thing. And then at some point, something happened where we said "oh, maybe not."

A silly post on this forum changed my beliefs years ago. Before MJ wrote the first book, he would share his thoughts and ideas here. At that point I was really just getting started in my career and thought I knew everything. I thought that business I was in was *it* and that was going to be the end-all be all. I was going to retire rich someday. And he pointed out some of the flaws in my math. It shook me up. Got me to go back to the drawing board and see that his beliefs were ones I wanted to adopt.

It took a moment. A conversation.

Most people think change happens over a long time. Nope. It takes one moment. Just one.
 

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Kung Fu Steve

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@Kung Fu Steve What a thread man! Thank you so much for sharing this information...
I'm from a country and "society" where everyone is indoctrinated from the moment he/she is born and where questioning and critical thinking is next to impossible because everyone is following the same financial and spiritual path and thus getting the same results. Growing up I had A LOT of beliefs that I have questioned consistently in the last 2 years all thanks to some individuals that are making a huge impact on many lives through their work. Some of them are motivational/inspirational speakers, like Sandeep Maheshwari from India, others are authors, like MJ.

Just to give a little perspective, most of us have had that experience of indoctrination no matter where we're from.

Here in the U.S., it's "go to school, get a job, work 40 years, vote, and hope someone will take care of you"

And if you questioned that, you must be batshit crazy!

Humans are so much more alike than they are different. The culture might feel different but if you dig in, you hear people's beliefs "Because I'm Italian, we're focused on family", or "Because I'm Chinese, my parents demand excellence from me", or "Because I'm from this neighborhood, I am destined for this"

I definitely don't want to downplay your experience, I just want to remind you that you're not alone :)
 

MJ DeMarco

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In my first year of college, I read "The Untethered Soul" by Michael A. Singer.
Then one of my friends recommended me MJ's books. So I read "Unscripted". These two books changed the way I saw and understood the world around me and myself. From that point today I'm constantly learning and questioning everything.

So cool to be associated with The Untethered Soul, it is as great book. I highly recommend his other one as well, The Surrender Experiment.

Please tell your friend "thank you" for recommending my work.
 

Miykoll

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Twice per day, I scroll through the forum. Occasionally I recognize patterns of thinking or behavior and I go through a little internal struggle: "do I respond to this question with a heartfelt response" or "should I just keep scrolling" -- I'll admit, I've been scrolling a lot more than responding lately so I figured I'd take a minute to give some unsolicited advice.
...
Great article Steve, here my believe.

Believe 1: People doing fitness are obsessed with their looks and I don't want to be obsessed with my body.
Confirmation: Going to a gym with my friend who was obsessed with muscle and a lot of people were training for more muscle and better looking.

1st Shift: Girlfriend finished Yoga Instructor coach and started to give classes which I attended from the beginning. I experienced the effect of a healthy body and the need for strong muscles.
2nd Shift: Doing a summer-break try-out at a local gym. The gym is a luxurious gym with tennis tracks, swimming pool and wellness. The people here are training for healthy body and mind for better performance and increasing the business. (Would I go to the cheap gyms here, then I probably would have a confirmation of the believe due to the slow track people doing fitness there).
 

ExaltedLife

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A particularly nefarious belief that I had when I was young was "It's wrong for me to do my best because it isn't fair to those who don't share my ability". Not sure where it came from exactly, but I think my Catholic education was involved.
 

Think Expand

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@Kung Fu Steve I hope you will also help me out here. When I got started online, I sent more than 100 proposals/applications for jobs in my local market, but not any good reply. I was poor, broke and had lots of silly beliefs in the helpless category.

However, one day applied to a job at Craig list, still in the Ghana category. Luckily, I got a quick reply and started working. But this guy lives in the USA, New York. Since 2017 to 2019, about 90% of my income has come from the USA/UK even though I work in Ghana.

But one day, I realized that I have hit the ceiling. I can't make any much more.. because even if I work 10hrs per day for 6 days, I just can't break above my monthly financial targets. I started getting sicky and thinner because I seem to be overworking and never feeling happy even though I was making good money.

I guess that was when all my problems started...

I noticed I had to move from freelancing to entrepreneurship. So, started an agency last year, but serving my local country folks rather than getting the big deals from the US, since I slightly lost focus and my freelance deals with some of US/UK companies I was working with.

When I started, and even now, I still struggle with these limiting beliefs. Back about 90% of my income comes from abroad and 10% local. Now, it's a reverse 90% local, 10% abroad. I just keep managing them and moving on.

Finding better deals in my local country is difficult.
Getting local people to pay for deals is slow and slow.. and this slows up operation.
Looks like I sell lower than most of my competitors in the US/UK.
Other people are finding better deals because they live in better markets.


My first target is to dominate my local market... and become a local champion...create more jobs for lots of young people here and then scale to Nigeria and South Africa. Yet, I still had to deal with these limiting beliefs if I want to get there.

I had spent this weekend reading MJ's Millionaire Fastlane to also get some help there as well. Please, can you offer some help to deal with these silly limiting beliefs?
 

SamRussell

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So, it's going to be a bit meta, but here is one belief I'd like to be challenged:
I believe that beliefs (no matter justified or erroneous) are imprinted on you either by experience or your environment. Which means I'm not sure people can truly change their beliefs just by reading a statement contrary to a belief they currently hold.

Not trying to discredit your post, it's a great insight in itself. I'm just wondering whether passing this message, in this form, can truly help some people, or if it's a waste of time because either people already believe what you believe, or they don't, and thus can't change their belief just by reading a message on a forum.

The latter would be my belief, although the more mature I get, the more open to changing my beliefs I am.

Everyone, who believes anything always has "evidence" for their beliefs.

When we start to challenge a belief, we will instantly spit back the "evidence". This is easy to see, if you talk to someone and challenge a belief they have.

One way you can start to counter this is by playing devils advocate against your belief.... and investigate is there evidence that possibly contradicts, or adds some context to your belief.

Thanks to confirmation bias, we rarely look for evidence that opposes any belief we have. More often than not, we can find examples from our own experiences if we think critically about them for 5 minutes.
 

Fiza Hanif

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Just to give a little perspective, most of us have had that experience of indoctrination no matter where we're from.
You are right man!
I completely agree with you... Cultures, traditions, and ways of living are different but human psychology or nature is very much the same.
I definitely don't want to downplay your experience, I just want to remind you that you're not alone
Thanks :) and don't worry!
 

Fiza Hanif

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YacineLaid

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Twice per day, I scroll through the forum. Occasionally I recognize patterns of thinking or behavior and I go through a little internal struggle: "do I respond to this question with a heartfelt response" or "should I just keep scrolling" -- I'll admit, I've been scrolling a lot more than responding lately so I figured I'd take a minute to give some unsolicited advice.

Your current results are a direct reflection of your belief systems.

That means the amount of money you have in your bank account today is not due to covid, the election, California burning, or how you were treated as a child... it is a culmination of your beliefs around money that you've held for the last 6 days, 6 weeks, 6 months, 6 years...

Beliefs like "should I save my money or spend it", "should I invest or not", "should I go all in on my business or do it part time", or "is this really even going to work?"

The "Covid 19" weight that people have gained wasn't because of the pandemic. It was because of your beliefs around exercising and eating healthy "should I work out or skip it", "what's healthy or unhealthy"

Relationships, too. "Should I be in one or not", "what should I accept in this relationship and what shouldn't I accept in this relationship"

If you aren't happy with your current results, here's my suggestion:

Identify and change your limiting beliefs.

Luckily, there's really only 3 types of limiting beliefs; hopeless, helpless, and worthless.

Hopeless Beliefs are the ones where somebody says "Just shut up, Steve. Nobody can make money in this economy. Nobody can build a business in this situation.
Relationships never last anyways.
My genetics won't allow me to get in shape.
This is bullshit, it can't be done!"

Helpless Beliefs are when someone says, "Easy for you to say. MJ can do it because he had a better idea.
They have more money than me.
They have more time than me.
They have less kids than me.
They have more hair than me.
That's why THEY can do it and I can't!"

Worthless Beliefs are where someone says, "Fine, fine. You're right. Everybody can make money. Everyone can have a long-lasting loving relationship. Everyone can have a great body... but if I'm being honest with you, man... I just don't think I deserve it. I don't think I'm worth it. I don't think if I made that money, I'd be able to keep it. I don't think if I got into that relationship, I could ever make them stay."

Can you see how devastating this psychology and these beliefs could be to someone's life and business?

For those of you who are here asking the questions over and over again like "should I go or stay", "should I invest or not", "should I start this business or put it off" -- my question for you is which one of these beliefs are really holding you back? ...And are they really true?

While I often spend hours helping people shift their beliefs, I can tell you exactly how to do it in very few words:

A belief is simply a feeling of absolute certainty you have about something.

If you didn't have certainty about that belief... you wouldn't believe it! You just feel like it's true. (And man it really does FEEL real, doesn't it?)

To change a limiting belief, simply start by figuring out what the belief is, then create doubt in it. Ask the question "is this belief really true?" and "are there examples of someone in my situation that made it work anyways?" or "have I even succeeded at this in the past and maybe I'm just overthinking it, now?"

I'm more than willing to help but I think it would be even more valuable for you and the whole forum -- if you're up for it -- to post an old belief you held in the past... and then what changed it for you? How do you see it now?

As an example... growing up, I truly believed money was scarce and extremely hard to come by. The first real shift in that mindset was coming here on the forum and meeting really successful people who started with nothing. When they spoke about how easy it was to make money, it really created doubt in that belief. "Maybe it ISN'T so tough... I'm just making it a bigger deal than it really is..."

Today when I look at how much money is in the system (especially here in the U.S. with another 2 TRILLION dollars floating around), I can't help but think "wow, it really is everywhere and people have no problem spending it!"

What is it for you? What shifted? What changed?
It isn't that easy to change the beliefs even with consciousness and certitude that it's not helping you. It needs discipline and repetition every damn day until it change. Cause even if you think you're believing in something new emotion aren't there. And the subconscious keep working with the old one's. The better and the fastest way is to start by meditation learn to calm and relax your mind and reading some books that helps like (limitless Jim kwik ) the miracle morning hal Elrod .napoleon hill ( law of success , think and grow rich ...etc) and than having and everyday plan. And by time you'll feel your beliefs changing, and by time you become a new version of your self that make you get more health wealth love and happiness....
And this will be your new lifestyle reading books doing meditation and affirmations visualising and then working smarter and having more energy and money to invest in your dreams that nourish your beliefs your purpose your life it's not that hard if you get the real attention to do it for a lifetime it will be hard just like the first week and the end of the week you'll start feeling better and you feel it really inside you that's enough to push you trought .
Sorry if I did some mistakes in language I'm just becoming bilingual for like months. I'm from Algeria and the second language in my country is French so I'm still developing my English skill.
Wish you'll health wealth love and happiness
 

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