Hello everyone.
First off, I'm writing this one handed on my cell phone at 4am while trying to rock the baby to sleep. There will probably be a few typos. I need to get this off my chest though, I can feel the pressure bearing down on me, and I have to get it out, even if it's too a forum of strangers that have never met me.
I grew up in a small rural town. I graduated in 2005 (I'm 34 now) in a class of 37 people. My town had no stop light; only a gas station, a post office, a delapidated diner that has more rats than customers and a trailer park that was 100 yards from my school.
I didn't grow up poor, I'd say we were middle working class. My dad worked on cars before he got his union job. My mom worked at the hospital. We had everything we needed growing up; I had a Nintendo, an ATV I rode with my brother on our 5 acres. We had a good childhood.
Little did I realize the limits that were placed on my reality by my family. I don't blame anyone ; they didn't know any different, and never had the resources and technology I have now to learn any different way of life. Not a single person in my immediate family has a college degree. Nobody, from my grandpas, grandma's, mom or dad has known anything but a clock in and clock out 9-5.
My dad devoted his later working years to the union, which began to eat at his soul with the stress and pressure that the position brought on. He enjoyed the Prestige, but it eventually drove him to secretly, then openly become an alcoholic for about 10 years.
When I was in high school, all I ever wanted to do was follow in my grandpa and dad's footsteps and to work in the same industry. I attained that and got a well paying job with good benefits.
I loved it at first ; it was challenging, exciting, and in my little world, I couldn't dream of anything more.
I made it.
Fast forward 8 years from there, it's now 2014. I meet a girl from out of town. She's shirt, blonde, beautiful... and she's from LA.
I don't know why this girl decided to move from LA to my little mill town, but here she is. We go on a few dates and eventually get married.
This is where my reality begins to flip upside down.
I begin to meet her family. I notice a trend; nobody has a boss. Not her dad, her brother, her sister... nobody.
They all work for themselves. They all have their own businesses.
I barely knew what the word "entrepreneur" was before I met my wife. I thought it was for other people, smarter than me with more resources and connections than me. I was a union trades person. I was proud of my blue collar, hard working and dangerous profession.
It was my... identity...
And then, I had a few beers with her dad one day. We talked jobs, business and life. I told him I lived my job, it paid well, but I noticed a lot of people in LA work for themselves.
He explained how he was glad I was happy at my job, but he couldn't imagine working for a boss. He had scraped enough money together at a young age when he emigrated to the states to start a small restaurant that he eventually turned into 6 different locations. He was an entrepreneur. He charted his own course in life.
That plain ride back home was where my life pivoted. I was going back to a small town, a job, a community that only had a 9-5 mindset. That wasn't me, anymore.
I downloaded books to listen to at work. Rich Dad Poor Dad (which, iro I ally, my situation looks very similar to), and then I found The Millionaire Fastlane .
I listened to that book 3 times. There was something about the blunt honesty that was addicting.
I stewed on that book for a few years. Tons of business ideas, absolutely zero action. I kept grinding away at my 9-5.
One baby.
Two babies.
Now I'm 34. I'm having what some might call a midlife crisis. I'm afraid to call it that.
My dad just retired, extatic to escape the job he once idolized. My father in law in LA retired years ago. He's much younger than my dad and will neve need to work again from his businesses and investments.
My job is no longer fulfilling. Day in, day out, same shit. It's still a great job, it pays the bills, feeds my family and provides insurance for all of us.
For me though, it's doing nothing but that. I'm unfulfilled. Unmotivated to do this until I'm my dad's age, 30 more years, only to walk away frustrated and disgrunteled by a job I once revered and proudly identified with.
My sister in law just sold her Amazon business. She worked on it for 4 years. I remember the say she flew to Vegas to learn about e-commerce. She knew nothing, and worked like a dog every day since then. Her and her partner just sold it for 4 million. I'm extremely proud of her, but now I'm forced to examine my own life.
I'm at a crossroads. I can't keep doing this same unfulfilling work until I die. If my sister in law could do something like that, what makes me think I couldn't at least have a shot at success in my own business?
Now I have kids and a wife that depend on me while my soul seems to flicker out.
I need something else, something of my own, my own passion, my own project, my own business that nobody else can control but me....even if it's just a dream I chase for the rest of my life.
It's better than the alternative; groundhog day until I'm 62.
Thanks for reading.
- B
First off, I'm writing this one handed on my cell phone at 4am while trying to rock the baby to sleep. There will probably be a few typos. I need to get this off my chest though, I can feel the pressure bearing down on me, and I have to get it out, even if it's too a forum of strangers that have never met me.
I grew up in a small rural town. I graduated in 2005 (I'm 34 now) in a class of 37 people. My town had no stop light; only a gas station, a post office, a delapidated diner that has more rats than customers and a trailer park that was 100 yards from my school.
I didn't grow up poor, I'd say we were middle working class. My dad worked on cars before he got his union job. My mom worked at the hospital. We had everything we needed growing up; I had a Nintendo, an ATV I rode with my brother on our 5 acres. We had a good childhood.
Little did I realize the limits that were placed on my reality by my family. I don't blame anyone ; they didn't know any different, and never had the resources and technology I have now to learn any different way of life. Not a single person in my immediate family has a college degree. Nobody, from my grandpas, grandma's, mom or dad has known anything but a clock in and clock out 9-5.
My dad devoted his later working years to the union, which began to eat at his soul with the stress and pressure that the position brought on. He enjoyed the Prestige, but it eventually drove him to secretly, then openly become an alcoholic for about 10 years.
When I was in high school, all I ever wanted to do was follow in my grandpa and dad's footsteps and to work in the same industry. I attained that and got a well paying job with good benefits.
I loved it at first ; it was challenging, exciting, and in my little world, I couldn't dream of anything more.
I made it.
Fast forward 8 years from there, it's now 2014. I meet a girl from out of town. She's shirt, blonde, beautiful... and she's from LA.
I don't know why this girl decided to move from LA to my little mill town, but here she is. We go on a few dates and eventually get married.
This is where my reality begins to flip upside down.
I begin to meet her family. I notice a trend; nobody has a boss. Not her dad, her brother, her sister... nobody.
They all work for themselves. They all have their own businesses.
I barely knew what the word "entrepreneur" was before I met my wife. I thought it was for other people, smarter than me with more resources and connections than me. I was a union trades person. I was proud of my blue collar, hard working and dangerous profession.
It was my... identity...
And then, I had a few beers with her dad one day. We talked jobs, business and life. I told him I lived my job, it paid well, but I noticed a lot of people in LA work for themselves.
He explained how he was glad I was happy at my job, but he couldn't imagine working for a boss. He had scraped enough money together at a young age when he emigrated to the states to start a small restaurant that he eventually turned into 6 different locations. He was an entrepreneur. He charted his own course in life.
That plain ride back home was where my life pivoted. I was going back to a small town, a job, a community that only had a 9-5 mindset. That wasn't me, anymore.
I downloaded books to listen to at work. Rich Dad Poor Dad (which, iro I ally, my situation looks very similar to), and then I found The Millionaire Fastlane .
I listened to that book 3 times. There was something about the blunt honesty that was addicting.
I stewed on that book for a few years. Tons of business ideas, absolutely zero action. I kept grinding away at my 9-5.
One baby.
Two babies.
Now I'm 34. I'm having what some might call a midlife crisis. I'm afraid to call it that.
My dad just retired, extatic to escape the job he once idolized. My father in law in LA retired years ago. He's much younger than my dad and will neve need to work again from his businesses and investments.
My job is no longer fulfilling. Day in, day out, same shit. It's still a great job, it pays the bills, feeds my family and provides insurance for all of us.
For me though, it's doing nothing but that. I'm unfulfilled. Unmotivated to do this until I'm my dad's age, 30 more years, only to walk away frustrated and disgrunteled by a job I once revered and proudly identified with.
My sister in law just sold her Amazon business. She worked on it for 4 years. I remember the say she flew to Vegas to learn about e-commerce. She knew nothing, and worked like a dog every day since then. Her and her partner just sold it for 4 million. I'm extremely proud of her, but now I'm forced to examine my own life.
I'm at a crossroads. I can't keep doing this same unfulfilling work until I die. If my sister in law could do something like that, what makes me think I couldn't at least have a shot at success in my own business?
Now I have kids and a wife that depend on me while my soul seems to flicker out.
I need something else, something of my own, my own passion, my own project, my own business that nobody else can control but me....even if it's just a dream I chase for the rest of my life.
It's better than the alternative; groundhog day until I'm 62.
Thanks for reading.
- B
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