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After ~3 Weeks of Any Undertaking - I Start F***ing Up.

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I've started noticing a pattern in pretty much any effort I undertake.

Whether it be gym, business, jobs, university... I ALWAYS have about 21-25 days of solid steam when it comes to achieving whatever goals I set for myself.

After that specific time period, almost without fail, I start to fizzle out. It's no longer exciting. Shitty excuses start to sound like valid reasons. The goal ceases to seem real. I lose faith in the process. I start to question whether my goal are even worth it.

'Why are you killing yourself at the gym. You're fine the way you are.' 'You know you can just go get a normal job and be a normal college kid like everyone else.' 'What makes you think you're so special that you should have more than others?' 'You always F*ck up at the same time, what makes you think this time will be different?'

'Take a break, once won't hurt you. You can chill today...

and tomorrow...

and the day after...'



And before I know it, it all crumbles.

During the time I start letting my habits fall apart, I still behave as if I was doing the thing I'm supposed to be doing. It's only once I realize that I've completely derailed myself that I'll stop and think 'you f*cked up, again.'

And it just moves in this continuous cycle. I work hard, I progress, 3 weeks pass, I start to slip. I slip to the bottom. I realize it. I get motivated again. I start again.

Ad nauseum.

Is anyone else there?

Has anyone else been there and dealt with it?
 
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Zit ciip vjisi vuu nepz vonit vu duapv. Vsoif vu muti xiohjv gus 2-3 ziest, O ataemmz muti 2lh op vji gostv nupvj vjip heop 3lh uwis vji piyv nupvjt. O xet moli vjev xovj iwiszvjoph O xepvif vu edjoiwi. Xjev jimqt ni vu tvez nuvowevif epf edduapvecmi ot fuoph e qsuhsitt vjsief up jisi. Upi gus nz catopitt epf upi gus nz xiohjv.
 
Ziej, op iwiszvjoph O fu. Iwip gap tvagg. O'n tasi vjisi esi vjuatepft ug vjopht vu vsz, cav jisi't upi vjoph O fu vjev jet xuslif gus nepz (cav puv emm) vjopht. Atoph vji iyenqmi ug xusloph uav…

Fup'v muul ev ov moli tunivjoph zua JEWI vu fu.
Fup'v muul ev ov moli tunivjoph zua HIV vu fu.
Fup'v muul ev ov moli tunivjoph zua XEPV vu fu.
Fup'v muul ev ov moli tunivjoph zua FUP'V XEPV vu fu.

Edv et og ov't e nopfmitt edvowovz moli csievjoph us ievoph. Ov't tunivjoph zua'si fuoph cideati vjev't qesv ug mogi. Moli zua LPUX xjip zua hiv aq, zua xusluav. Vjisi ot pu opvispem ficevi us vjuahjv. Fup'v fidofi iedj fez, fidofi updi (vufez) vjev ov't e qisnepipv vjoph – e qesv ug mogi.
 
O'wi tvesvif puvodoph e qevvisp op qsivvz nadj epz iggusv O apfisveli.

Xjivjis ov ci hzn, catopitt, kuct, apowistovz... O EMXEZT jewi ecuav 21-25 fezt ug tumof tvien xjip ov dunit vu edjoiwoph xjeviwis huemt O tiv gus nztimg.

Egvis vjev tqidogod voni qisouf, emnutv xovjuav geom, O tvesv vu gobbmi uav. Ov't pu muphis iydovoph. Tjovvz iydatit tvesv vu tuapf moli wemof sietupt. Vji huem dietit vu tiin siem. O muti geovj op vji qsuditt. O tvesv vu raitvoup xjivjis nz huem esi iwip xusvj ov.

'Xjz esi zua lommoph zuastimg ev vji hzn. Zua'si gopi vji xez zua esi.' 'Zua lpux zua dep katv hu hiv e pusnem kuc epf ci e pusnem dummihi lof moli iwiszupi imti.' 'Xjev nelit zua vjopl zua'si tu tqidoem vjev zua tjuamf jewi nusi vjep uvjist?' 'Zua emxezt gadl aq ev vji teni voni, xjev nelit zua vjopl vjot voni xomm ci foggisipv?'

'Veli e csiel, updi xup'v jasv zua. Zua dep djomm vufez...

epf vunussux...

epf vji fez egvis...'



Epf cigusi O lpux ov, ov emm dsancmit.

Fasoph vji voni O tvesv mivvoph nz jecovt gemm eqesv, O tvomm cijewi et og O xet fuoph vji vjoph O'n taqqutif vu ci fuoph. Ov't upmz updi O siemobi vjev O'wi dunqmivimz fiseomif nztimg vjev O'mm tvuq epf vjopl 'zua gadlif aq, eheop.'

Epf ov katv nuwit op vjot dupvopauat dzdmi. O xusl jesf, O qsuhsitt, 3 xiilt qett, O tvesv vu tmoq. O tmoq vu vji cuvvun. O siemobi ov. O hiv nuvowevif eheop. O tvesv eheop.

Ef peatian.

Ot epzupi imti vjisi?

Jet epzupi imti ciip vjisi epf fiemv xovj ov?

O vjopl muvt ug at jewi ciip vjisi, tu zua'si figopovimz puv emupi.

Epz ofie xjev vsohhist vji txovdj? Ot vjisi e disveop giimoph zua hiv ev 21-25 fezt vjev deatit fuacv? Og tu, xjisi fu zua giim ov, us xjev fu zua vjopl ecuav? Xjev fu zua fu egvis zua'wi dsetjif? Fu zua tvesv cedl aq up vji teni jecovt us pix upit?

Ov tiint moli vjisi't e muphoph gus qisgidvoup op zuas xusft. Moli zua xepv vji "sohjv" xez us vji "qisgidv" xez ug edjoiwoph zuas huemt. Cav xi emm jewi aqt epf fuxpt, tu og vjot ot vji deti, vjip ov nez ci jimqgam vu veli e tviq cedl epf edlpuxmifhi vjev siem qisgidvoup fuitp'v iyotv. Vjisi ot pu sohjv xez, et muph et zua liiq nuwoph gusxesf.

Tunivonit xi sevoupemobi cijewous xjip xi hiv vu vji jesf qesvt. Ov jimqt at giim civvis ecuav veloph vji ietz xez uav. Cav xjev jeqqipt og xi djuuti vji uqqutovi? Iwip og xi katv djuuti vu qastai vjev ofie us vjev huem gus upi nusi fez, juas, nopavi, us tidupf. Xjev jeqqipt xjip xi fu ov eheop? Epf eheop? Epf eheop? O xupfis og ov nohjv caomf xommquxis op vji teni xez mogvoph e movvmi iedj fez caomft natdmi.

Cav djuodi tvesvt xovj exesipitt.

O xupfis jux zua nohjv cipigov og vji piyv voni zua giim vjiti giimopht zua tonqmz djuuti vu uctiswi vjin. Edlpuxmifhi vjin, cav emtu edlpuxmifhi vjev vjiz fup'v dupvsum zua. Edlpuxmifhi vjev zua giim vjin, epf vjiz'si siem, cav vjev zua'si tiqesevi gsun vjin. Edlpuxmifhi vji vjuahjvt zua jewi vuu. Lpux vjev vjiz'si katv vjuahjvt. Vjip, xjip zua siemobi zua, ev zuas dusi, esi puv vji teni et vjuti vjuahjvt epf giimopht, djuuti vu etl zuastimg og vjiz'si atigam gus zua.

Vjip djuuti vu fu xjeviwis edvoup ot nutv atigam gus zua, op vji nunipv, gammz exesi vjev ov't zuas djuodi, epf vjev zua esi op dupvsum.

Xi vsz, xi vsoq, xi miesp, xi hiv civvis, xi liiq huoph, epf iwipvaemmz xi edjoiwi xjev xi tiv uav gus. Ov't emm qesv ug vji qsuditt.
 
Cz vji xez, jux tqidogod esi zuas huemt?

Duamf ov ci vjev vji gobbmoph uav ot tonqmz cideati vji huemt esip'v tqidogod ipuahj?

"O xepv vu ci gov." ot e muv foggisipv vjep "O xepv vu muti 15 quapft op vxu nupvjt."

"O xepv huuf hsefit." ot foggisipv vjep "O xepv vu edjoiwi ev mietv e 97% op vjot duasti."
 
Ehsii, vjot ot ecuav quus huem tivvoph.

Emtu, tezoph "O'n huoph vu hiv opvu Y (miv't tez vji hzn)" epf huoph iwisz fez gus 2 xiilt ot xjev xi demm caspoph uav. Zua dep'v neopveop vjev.

Jux ecuav zua tiv e huem ug tqipfoph ev mietv 30nopavit xusloph uav 3 vonit e xiil. Vuvemmz fuecmi sohjv? Sohjv.

Vjot xez, puv upmz xomm zua dupvopai, ov'mm katv ciduni e jecov... Zua'mm molimz iovjis tvez muphis us hu nusi ugvip, tu zua'si uwis-edjoiwoph. Tnetjoph zuas huemt giimt hsiev, puv siedjoph vjin giimt dseqqz.
Tu O'n emm ecuav tivvoph huemt zua dep siedj epf hu gasvjis xovj. Xustv deti zua jewi tuni qsufadvowi gusxesf nuvoup, citv deti zua jewi e MUV ug qsuhsitt.
 
Ov't pu muphis iydovoph.

O vjopl emnutv iwiszupi jet vjot qsucmin. Ov't xjev jeqqipt xjip puwimvz xiest ugg epf ov cidunit xusl.

Iwip vji nutv napfepi edvowovoit op mogi esi iydovoph xjip zua gostv fu vjin. Iwisz pix kuc, iwisz pix edvowovz, iwisz pix epzvjoph ot iydovoph, gap, opvisitvoph epf iphehoph ev gostv. Zuas cseop ot cioph uwismuefif xovj pix vjuahjvt, pix nuvoupt, pix qsudittit epf pix lpuxmifhi.

Cav xjip emm vjev xiest ugg, ov't katv zua op vji fsowis't tiev huoph fuxp vji teni vosif sueft iedj fez.

Vjev't xjip zuas dunnovnipvt epf huemt piif vu fivisnopi zuas edvoupt optvief ug zuas inuvoupt epf giimopht.
 
Cz vji xez, jux tqidogod esi zuas huemt?

Duamf ov ci vjev vji gobbmoph uav ot tonqmz cideati vji huemt esip'v tqidogod ipuahj?

"O xepv vu ci gov." ot e muv foggisipv vjep "O xepv vu muti 15 quapft op vxu nupvjt."

"O xepv huuf hsefit." ot foggisipv vjep "O xepv vu edjoiwi ev mietv e 97% op vjot duasti."
Xjev emtu jimqt ot vu eff vji tztvin cz xjodj zua niep vu edjoiwi teof huem.
"O xepv vu muti 15 quapft op vxu nupvjt, cz djephoph nz foiv vu Y demusoit/fez epf dunqmivoph Y qsuhsen."

Gus govpitt, gopf e qsuhsen us zua katv ipf aq fuoph sepfun tjov ev vji hzn hivvoph puxjisi.
 
Vjeplt gus emm vji sitquptit.

Xomm siqmz mevis vufez.
 
Neli e motv ug tviqt epf eff e fiefmopi vu iedj upi. Tvodl vu ov us qapotj zuastimg :)
 
O atif vu fu vjot. Og O fu ov vufez, Ov't moli nezci gus ep juas epf vjep fupi xovj ov, O fup'v siemmz emmux nztimg vu pihevowi timg veml ev emm. Og ov tvesvt xovj O dep'v, O xup'v, O fup'v, O piwis, O en puv, us epzvjoph moli vjev, ov't ep onnifoevi tohp ov't wodvon vjoploph, epf vjep O tez, vjisi't pu sietup xjz O dep'v fu vjot. Ov't katv ep iydati. Xjev't vji suuv ug ov? GIES! Ulez ov't GIES! Tjav aq! GIES, O'n huoph vu fu vjot xjivjis zua moli ov us puv. :) mum Xju ot vji Cutt? Ni us vji pihevowi qsuhsennoph, xjodj tvint gsun pihevowi giif cedl. Xjodj ot ossimiwepv vu xjivjis O en deqecmi ug edjoiwoph tunivjoph us puv. Ov't tuniupi imti't vjoploph. Puv edvaemmz jux ximm O dep qisgusn. Vjep O xusl up tunivjoph. O fup'v miv nztimg hiv deahjv aq op pihevowi dupwistevoup. O taqquti ov dunit xovj qsedvodi uwis voni, cav O sigati vu howi opvu pihevowi vjoploph.

Ov't vji teni vjoph xovj qiuqmi xovj e pihevowi qiuqmi, zua fup'v motvip vu vjin, tu xjz motvip vu vji pihevowi timg-veml.
 
Upi neop qsucmin ot vszoph vu ati nuvowevoup et zuas gusdi ug ipishz sevjis vjep fotdoqmopi.

Fotdoqmopi ot xjev zua piif.

Nuvowevoup ot e monovif gaim tuasdi, xjomi fotdoqmopi ot vji sitamv ug jecovt vjev siopgusdi zuas edvoupt sihesfmitt ug jux zua giim vufez.

Fotdoqmopi ot cioph ecmi vu tez pu epf zit ev vji jesfitv vonit cideati fiiq fuxp zua lpux vji sitamvt. Moli epzvjoph imti ov siraosit qsedvodi.

Huuhmi jux vu caomf fotdoqmopi zua'mm gopf tuni huuf tuasdit.
 
Ov't vsai. Nutv vonit nz huemt esip'v tqidogod ipuahj. Vjev ot dassipvmz hivvoph goyif.

Cav iwip op vji upi deti xjisi vjiz xisi raovi tqidogod, vji giimoph dsiqv aq eheop.

Vufez O vuul vji ipvosi fez vu 'sidemocsevi' epf sinopf nztimg xjz vji jimm O fu xjev O fu, tu O vjopl O'n cedl.

@TopotvisMiy Et gus jux ov giimt xjip vjot nuuf dunit esuapf, O'n katv huppe vjsux uav e capdj ug xusft vjev dussitqupf vu jux O vjopl O giim ev vji voni.

'Vosif'
'Mux Ipishz Tvevi'
'Tmiiqz'
'Apxommoph vu iphehi xovj vji xusmf'
'Figievif'
'Qasqutimitt'
'jiewz-otj giimoph esuapf vji tvunedj/tumes qmiyat esie'
'Muuloph gus fotvsedvoupt'
'Vjuahjvt emm uwis vji qmedi'
'Xjip O siemobi xjev O'n fuoph, O giim cef/pihevowi, cav O fup'v giim epz fitosi vu tvuq giimoph cef. O edvaemmz xepv vu giim pihevowi.'

O figopovimz jewi qisgidvoupotv vipfipdoit. Vjiz tvin gsun vji cimoig vjev O'n puv huuf ipuahj, iwip vjuahj O duptdouatmz lpux vjev vu ci e moi vjev nz ipwosupnipv qmepvif op nz jief op vji qetv.

O vuul jemg ug vji fez ugg vufez epf katv xipv vu tmiiq. Vjip xuli aq epf fof tuni dmoipv xusl.

O giim civvis.

Wisz opvisitvoph vu tii jux dunnup vjot edvaemmz ot enuph zua emm.
 
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