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Why only certain people "enjoy" the process? (Or is it something else?)

furiousJ

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I Really like MJs analogy of the desert of desertion, having spent a long vacation there myself. Without feedback and validation it can be hard to stay motivated for a long period of time. The only thing I find that helps is taking whatever action is necessary at the moment.
*edit oops didn't read op, smh at myself
 
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sparechange

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funny was just thinking about this a few moments ago, i think enjoying the process is a part addiction to escaping your reality.

atm my reality involves taking a bus, train and having to walk by a lamborghini dealership frequently, it puts a bit of pain inside me and i feel like worthless scum riding the bus, i want to be the guy in a $500k+ lambo with nice clean clothes and a gorgeous woman with massive breasts sitting beside me.

but who am i? just some stupid loser that rides a bus. as a reminder when im feeling tired when working on something ill think about this quite frequently. consider the process a temporary escape.
 

Thoelk

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atm my reality involves taking a bus, train and having to walk by a lamborghini dealership frequently, it puts a bit of pain inside me and i feel like worthless scum riding the bus, i want to be the guy in a $500k+ lambo with nice clean clothes and a gorgeous woman with massive breasts sitting beside me.

It's not about what you want, it's about what you do... For what it's worth, if that's your (end-)goal of pursuing this road.. I'd suggest re-reading both books & comments of the most important posters here... I'd rather have as a goal: being able to take public transport/walk at my own pace, without having to hurry to be on time.. Because I'd have the freedom to do as I please.. a 500k car? I don't know, I don't see the benefit of it besides being a trophy to show what you've accomplished.. But that's still miles away, so no need to dream over these (for now) unreachable things.. Today is where it's at, and the process is what it's about.
 

ApeRunner

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Paul David

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Sorry it’s been a while since I’ve posted. I’ve been working on myself and my business.

I’ve just re-read the whole thread and once again I would like to thank yourself and everybody else who’s taken the time to respond.

I also hope the initial question has helped others who were struggling on finding the answer.

Myself? I’ve definitely got more of an understanding now between the differences between the process and problems that occur in general business. I feel as though I’ve still got further to travel but I’m on my way.




Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

LeoistheSun

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For me, the process wasn't any more or less enjoyable based on how much money I was making. Sure, more money is more better, but if anything, like MTF said above, the more money I was making, the less motivated I was. In other words, this is the most motivated you're likely to ever get. If you're not currently motivated (and excited) about getting up everyday and being an entrepreneur, you likely never will be.

If that's the case, perhaps entrepreneurship isn't for you? Or perhaps the specific business you're working on isn't for you?

Life is short -- when you have the option, choose something that will make you happy over something that won't...

I'm happy and motivated when I am doing something that benefits others. Its something that took me along time to figure out, and something that until recently I hadn't known.
 

ruzara5

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i personally don't believe it's possible to enjoy the process
Sometimes the process is longer. If success is attained. Hooray. If it fails. Reflect and if possible analysis. There is that saying. 'Fall down seven times get up eight'. Also have some 'water' while going through the desert of desertification. Where a good hat. And enjoy the sunshine. It is sometimes a desert out there.
 
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devingisraving

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I hear successful entrepreneurs say it quite a lot on motivation youtube videos or seminars.
Instead of focussing on the end goal, enjoy the journey and process along the way they say.

Personally for the majority of people in business i think it's bullshit. If you're just starting out in business and you're all excited about how much money you're going to make, or how you are going to change people's lives, give them value etc then yes i believe you will enjoy the "initial" process.

If you're making $25,000 a month or whatever your desired figure is then yes i believe you will be enjoying the daily process.

For anybody else, especially those who have been in the process for a number of years when the initial excitement has long gone and you've not reached your desired level, i believe the process becomes akin to those who go to work for somebody else every day.

It's Monday morning now, it's raining as usual and i've just taken kids to school. I'm just about to go on my daily 3m run then i will sit down and start work for the day. I can work from home or go to the office, which is exactly how i like to work compared to having to sit in a car stuck in traffic like a lot of people. So that side is all well and good.

However i wouldn't say i'm going to exactly "enjoy" what i'm going to do today. I don't look forward to sitting at my screen all day whilst the rain pounds against my window. Sure it's better than a lot other alternatives and i don't wish to sound ungrateful but if i had woken up this morning and seen that i'd made my desired target X amount of sales would i enjoy the process a lot more? Hell yes.

If i could afford to spend every school holiday away in the sun somewhere, drive a Range Rover, not have my wife work, be debt free etc how would i feel about spending this very same Monday. It would be great. I wouldn't want to do anything different.

Unless someone can perform a mindset change on me without evasive surgery i personally don't believe it's possible to enjoy the process unless you're a startup or have a desired financial income.
Look to be honest I believe to enjoy the process, one must enjoy what he initially does or just change his mindset. If what you like to do is go out and interact with people then start a business that is related to communication and interviews or whatever. The grind must be something that you are eager to do when you wake up. Money may come soon or never come, your main goal must be to make a legacy. If things aren't working out change your approach. You will always find a way tho. I would really like to engage with you on a conversation about this. Hope you enjoy your day.
 

Niptuck MD

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it has to do with the deconditioning of years of belief “security” and “soldification” and belief in a formula that if one does, A+B then it must equal C.

This is root that has no set formulas. No set rules nor instructions. THe only data we have is FAILURE and resources like this forum that has documentation of OTHER FAILURES....
 

Intax

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This is also translates to my non working life thinking about it.
I have a weight goal that i'm currently trying to achieve so i've set myself a target of 15 miles of running per week and 2 fasting days (600 calories or less) per week in order to achieve that. Now today is one of those fasting days. I just want to get the day over with so i can eat more normally tomorrow. Again i'm looking into the future. I also think though that sometimes in order to achieve something you have to sacrifice.

I know i need to enjoy more of the here and now, i think i just don't know how. I understand it must also be difficult for my wife and kids to live with someone who thinks like i do. It's hard enough for me and there are times i wish i could be that person who's content with what's he's got. That's just not me though. Not at the moment anyway.

The problem is the event driven approach described in Unscripted . If you do your running and fasting for your goal "to be more healthy, thinner,..." you aren't enjoying the process.

The process to your goal will only make you happy if you'll be able to find joy in sports, healthy eating, to forgo,....
Try to appreciate these actions, not for the sake of getting closer to you goal, only for the action itself. You can actively learn to enjoy activities you didn't like in the first place.

Learning to enjoy the process which brings us to our goal is the healthiest way to reach our goal finally.

I can highly recommend the classic book "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People"
 
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LuckyPup

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The problem is the event driven approach described in Unscripted . If you do your running and fasting for your goal "to be more healthy, thinner,..." you aren't enjoying the process.

The process to your goal will only make you happy if you'll be able to find joy in sports, healthy eating, to forgo,....
Try to appreciate these actions, not for the sake of getting closer to you goal, only for the action itself. You can actively learn to enjoy activities you didn't like in the first place.

Learning to enjoy the process which brings us to our goal is the healthiest way to reach our goal finally.

I can highly recommend the classic book "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People"
As the SEALs put it, learn to "embrace the suck." I second the "7 Habits."
 

Dami-B

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Enjoy the results your processes create.

For me, writing blog posts can be daunting, but knowing someone could get a job from reading that blog post gives me satisfaction.

I like the idea of being a hero to someone else, I like the idea of mastering my skillsets so that I can show another person the way.
 

Paul David

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**UPDATE**

It's been a while since i updated so here's where i'm currently at.

Have i started to enjoy the process more now? I suppose the answer is "yes" and "no" really.
I've spend a long time since writing that initial post really thinking about how i want my life to be, and what i want to do each day.

What i've learned is that i want to create something that's bigger than me, something that will last a long time after i've gone, think of your Fedex's, KFC, Adidas, Canon of the world. Massive companies that were started by one person. If i'm going to devote the majority of time to something it needs to be worthwhile.

What i was doing at the time of writing, was selling Power Adapters on Ebay and Amazon, and a small selection of other random products like RV parts. I didn't care much for the products and to be honest didn't care much for the customers either. A lot would buy the wrong adapter then it would cost me money to resolve the issue. And let's be honest, nobody cares about a power adapter.

It was a commodity based business and certainly not something i'd be proud enough to pass onto my Children when i'm gone. Fast forward to now and i've found something that's along the same lines, selling a physical product online but it's inside a niche that i'm interested in and is something i can build without relying on Ebay and Amazon. Initially i followed the same route i've gone down in the past of seeing a competitor, like their product and basically replicating the product which only a slight change in the design. Basically being a follower instead of a leader. I've now shelved that idea to create unique designs that are mine alone.

At the moment the products are in production (we've had samples but changed the design since), but i can't wait for them to arrive and get feedback from customers. This is something i've created, no-one can copy the design of the product and i can build a loyal following of customers, which i have started to do. I love interacting with them on facebook. I still have my other power adapter and RV products on EBay and Amazon but the aim for 2019 is to phase them all out once the income from my new brand is sufficient enough.

So yes i now enjoy the process more and will continue to do so even more once progress targets are met (phase out old products) but No i don't believe i would be enjoying the old process with the old products had i continued down that path.
 
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NVious

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Focus on improving your skillset

Focus on the grind

Focus on the fact in the long run you WILL approach 100% success rate

Achieve daily flow

NEVER stop learning

Be a learning machine-Munger




I personally fell into a deep depression and gained 100lbs not leaving my room, not showering, not doing anything, being a worthless sack of shit, why? 150 rejections over 3 months....sad

Me now? Approaching that number in 1.5 months with HIGH LEVEL people saying "we are 100% doing this" and then flaking, my mindset?


T9kVLqX.jpg
 
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Matt Sun

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My brasilian yoga teacher has this podcast i listen to learn portuguese, and there is a story about a monk who was always happy, for 5 years always happy, ten, 20, 50 years. So his student asked him, how can you be so happy ?! He replied:
-Every morning I wake up and I realize I have a choice, I can be miserable or I can be happy.

Relating to this forum, MJ de Marco also talks about his FTE and that he realize he wasn't a looser, he was a chooser.

This is similar to yoga/ayurvedic philosophy.

For what i 've read you:

-have a father with 20+ property
-have a wife
-have a son

Honestly, the choice is yours.
 

Kevin88660

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There are a lot of philosophies on process and success but over the years I realized or to differentiate fads from truth.

Things and slogan like “follow your passion” and even “enjoy the process” are quarter truth (not even half) that make you avoid facing with the hard truth.

Growing up in an Asian environment allow me to critically access the self-help material in the Anglo-Saxon English speaking world from another cultural perspective. I feel that the greatest flaw in a lot of the the self help material or philosophies today (English based content) is always about “Having the Cake and wanting to eat it”. I think it probably traces back from the protestant tradition of having the desire to make money and still go to heaven.

Many want to be successful but they still are not willing to give up other superficial desires/identities. I am not talking about working 14 hours a day and not being able to see your kid. I am talking about other mumbo jumbo that are publicly respected “qualities” that people refuse to give up.

These are
-“Enjoying the process”. But most of the time you have to do whatever it takes.

- “Providing value and not about selfishly making money”. Yes even that to some extent is crap and can be applied in a way that is detrimental to the business person. There is somehow a perception that just being selfless for a long period of time there will be some cosmic karma that will naturally get you paid later. I am afraid that is very misleading. A business person always thinks about how to get himself paid. In thinking along that line inevitable he will exploring some ventures that has to providing value in a win-win manner. But you do not put your interest as priority, I realized NO ONE else in world will. This is not a charity.

-“Fear of losing individuality”. This is by far the biggest elephant in the room that no one talks about. “Be yourself”...no thats doesn't work, then “be the best version of yourself..” but why not just accept that you are a slut for success and do whatever it takes.






I think the hard truth is to get what you want, you have to do WHATEVER it takes and it is very often NOT ENJOYABLE. Books that teach you tactics reduce 20 percent of the pain if you apply them but you still have to Endure the 80 percent of the rest. If not you end up chasing fads gears after years.
 
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Mckenzie

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I feel like you're confusing the word process with the word problem. And you might think it's semantics, but it's not. Language is SO important because the way we describe an experience becomes the experience.

This particular situation is what we call a problem. Sure it's a part of the greater process of building a business -- but that's what a business IS, finding solutions to problems and then delivering on that again and again and again.

Now the truth is you probably like dealing with some problems more than others, right?

You enjoy solving the problem of 'how do I collect money' or 'how do I ship this item' -- and I'm guessing you've already solved these problems. Or at least come up with a solution that's repeatable.

The challenge that you're having right now is frustrating and pissing you off because you haven't solved the problem yet.

And if I may be so bold -- the reason that is is because your emotional state in this moment is blocking your creativity -- blocking your resourcefulness.

When you're in a state of frustration, angry, lethargic, pissed off, overwhelmed, overloaded, sad, depressed you AREN'T going to come up with a bunch of different ways to solve the problem -- and this is where you are right now.

How do I know? Because if you only have 2 options -- you've failed. I don't know you so I don't mean to shove this in your face but from what I understand the only way you can solve the inventory problem is by paying the money... and the only way you can pay the money is if you get the inventory. No wonder you're in this zone!

If you were *in this moment* in an emotional state of gratitude, confidence, certainty, power, strength, happiness, joy, excited, motivated, creative -- you're going to say something like:

"Well what if I call the supplier and try to negotiate 90 day payments even though no one else has been able to do it?"
"What if I put this on a 0% interest credit card and then repay that in 90 days?"
"What if I ask a friend to invest for a couple of weeks while I solve this cashflow problem?"
"What if I find a different supplier that will work with me on this?"
"What if I can find a supplier that will supply smaller order sizes until I can afford a larger order?"
"What if I can partner with my supplier to create a win-win situation for us both?"
"What if I can partner with my customers to create a win-win situation?"

NOW you have options. When you have options you're in control. When you feel like you're in control? THAT'S when the process becomes fun. THAT'S where you turn this feeling of overwhelm into a feeling of POWER.

And if you think I'm just blowing smoke -- ask any of the top entrepreneurs on the forum here. The reason this community is so powerful is because when you're in a shitty emotional state you can call someone and say "hey man, I've got this problem. What do you think I can do?"

... which is kind of what you've done right here. Maybe the question in your next post should be "I'm having cashflow issues, what are some creative ways to solve it?" I guarantee you you'll find gold.

But last thing I'll say is that if you're in one of these negative emotional states you're going to respond to every one of those questions with:

"I can't. No one can. They said no. I don't have any friends. There aren't any suppliers. No one will do smaller order sizes. I can't partner with my supplier. I can't partner with my customer. That's stupid. That'll never work."

So to come full circle and answer the question one last time...

You've got to start from a place of gratitude, brother. If you aren't grateful for these problems you're having you have forgotten (in this moment) what a freaking awesome life you lead to be able to do something like this. Can you imagine the 60k-desk warriors who are going to be there for the rest of their lives until they get laid off? Can you imagine the people who can't start a business because they are terrified out of their wits at what you're facing now? You are a F*cking warrior -- a gladiator!

Look how much further ahead you are. Look at what you've already accomplished. Look at your mindset and how it's different than the vast majority of people around you. And then start to get grateful for the shit you've forgotten. Like your health, your family, your wealth, the roof over your head, the technology you didn't have to invent that you run your business on now -- hell the ability to HAVE a problem like you're currently having.

When you're grateful, when you're happy, when you're excited. You enjoy this thing we call a process.

No one said it would be easy. They only said it would be worth it.
Bump.
Thank you so much @Kung Fu Steve. Your posts in this thread are so important to me today. You just bent my head & turned it 180 degree the other way around! Thank you, thank you and thank you...
Also @Paul David , I really appreciate your OP, your honesty here. I can relate to most of what you described here. Any updates Paul? Thanks
 

Brian Suh

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I hear successful entrepreneurs say it quite a lot on motivation youtube videos or seminars.
Instead of focussing on the end goal, enjoy the journey and process along the way they say.

Personally for the majority of people in business i think it's bullshit. If you're just starting out in business and you're all excited about how much money you're going to make, or how you are going to change people's lives, give them value etc then yes i believe you will enjoy the "initial" process.

If you're making $25,000 a month or whatever your desired figure is then yes i believe you will be enjoying the daily process.

For anybody else, especially those who have been in the process for a number of years when the initial excitement has long gone and you've not reached your desired level, i believe the process becomes akin to those who go to work for somebody else every day.

It's Monday morning now, it's raining as usual and i've just taken kids to school. I'm just about to go on my daily 3m run then i will sit down and start work for the day. I can work from home or go to the office, which is exactly how i like to work compared to having to sit in a car stuck in traffic like a lot of people. So that side is all well and good.

However i wouldn't say i'm going to exactly "enjoy" what i'm going to do today. I don't look forward to sitting at my screen all day whilst the rain pounds against my window. Sure it's better than a lot other alternatives and i don't wish to sound ungrateful but if i had woken up this morning and seen that i'd made my desired target X amount of sales would i enjoy the process a lot more? Hell yes.

If i could afford to spend every school holiday away in the sun somewhere, drive a Range Rover, not have my wife work, be debt free etc how would i feel about spending this very same Monday. It would be great. I wouldn't want to do anything different.

Unless someone can perform a mindset change on me without evasive surgery i personally don't believe it's possible to enjoy the process unless you're a startup or have a desired financial income.
Knowing my outcome the process doesn’t matter. The result is so juicy that I’ll do what it takes
 

Solais

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I hear successful entrepreneurs say it quite a lot on motivation youtube videos or seminars.
Instead of focussing on the end goal, enjoy the journey and process along the way they say.

Personally for the majority of people in business i think it's bullshit. If you're just starting out in business and you're all excited about how much money you're going to make, or how you are going to change people's lives, give them value etc then yes i believe you will enjoy the "initial" process.

If you're making $25,000 a month or whatever your desired figure is then yes i believe you will be enjoying the daily process.

For anybody else, especially those who have been in the process for a number of years when the initial excitement has long gone and you've not reached your desired level, i believe the process becomes akin to those who go to work for somebody else every day.

It's Monday morning now, it's raining as usual and i've just taken kids to school. I'm just about to go on my daily 3m run then i will sit down and start work for the day. I can work from home or go to the office, which is exactly how i like to work compared to having to sit in a car stuck in traffic like a lot of people. So that side is all well and good.

However i wouldn't say i'm going to exactly "enjoy" what i'm going to do today. I don't look forward to sitting at my screen all day whilst the rain pounds against my window. Sure it's better than a lot other alternatives and i don't wish to sound ungrateful but if i had woken up this morning and seen that i'd made my desired target X amount of sales would i enjoy the process a lot more? Hell yes.

If i could afford to spend every school holiday away in the sun somewhere, drive a Range Rover, not have my wife work, be debt free etc how would i feel about spending this very same Monday. It would be great. I wouldn't want to do anything different.

Unless someone can perform a mindset change on me without evasive surgery i personally don't believe it's possible to enjoy the process unless you're a startup or have a desired financial income.

It's not something that can be rationalized. You have to go deep into the trenches and pull off a victory. That's where the reward lies.
 
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GoodluckChuck

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Part of being more successful than others is being better at handling the boring parts. Everyone has to do it. Life is short but the days are long. The people that can push through are the ones that get the rewards. Check out 75 Hard.

What gets me excited is looking past the little bits of work I need to do and seeing the big picture. I'm trying to build a machine that can run without me. It's currently broken and incomplete so it's super exciting to me to solve those problems. Once they are solved I'll have to find other problems to solve. It's that challenge that keeps me engaged and excited. I think this is what a lot of people fall in love with. They find real meaning and purpose in solving these problems because they are the only ones for the job.

Read the book Man's Search for Meaning and you'll get some great tips on creating meaning in your life. Once you have your why you can endure any how.
 

Paul David

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Bump.
Thank you so much @Kung Fu Steve. Your posts in this thread are so important to me today. You just bent my head & turned it 180 degree the other way around! Thank you, thank you and thank you...
Also @Paul David , I really appreciate your OP, your honesty here. I can relate to most of what you described here. Any updates Paul? Thanks


Since my last update in January i've launched my new brand and sold my power adapter brand. I felt a big weight lifted off my shoulders when the old brand was sold. 15 years of was long enough and had taken its toll.

I've been using facebook ads to grow the new brand and to be honest was expecting a better start than i've had.

I've also recently been reading a lot of self help books, mindset improvement and Bob Proctor type you tube videos. They have certainly improved my outlook as i was really struggling a few months ago.

At the moment the initial excitement of launching the brand has gone and now the real in the trench work has begun on growing it. I will be a lot happier when it's earning enough to provide at least an adequate monthly wage but this is where i believe a lot of entrepreneurs give up or look for other things.
 

Paul David

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Interchange process with growth.

Process = Growth

When people say they enjoy the process, my belief is that they actually mean growth. The continuous improvement of your business. Achievement.

That achievement allows your brain to release certain chemicals like dopamine, allowing you to get pleasurable feelings from growth and achievement. If you're not achieving anything, and your brain is not releasing the necessary chemicals for "enjoyment", then you're not enjoying the process.

You need to focus on growth.

And if your brain is wired differently, and you don't enjoy growth, then you need to reconsider being an entrepreneur.

So essentially then it's a normal feeling to be downbeat when your business isn't "growing" ? I get a dopamine rush when i get an email saying New order. But it also works the opposite way. If i go a day without one i become anxious, and start asking questions such as "is this really a good idea" or "this isn't going to work". Maybe the negative talk stems from mistakes in business i've made in the past, and i've lost confidence in myself.
 
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Personally, I've always found that even when I wasn't making any/much money at all there were parts of creating/running businesses that I loved, and parts that I hated.

I always really enjoyed coming up with new ideas, coming up with business or product names. Designing the website layout, writing business plans etc. However I never really enjoyed the grunt work like building backlinks for SEO, or dealing with customers.

Now that my business is doing well that hasn't changed at all. There's parts of the journey I love, and parts that I hate. Overall though, I'd say I love the journey with all it's ups and downs far more than I loved working a regular job.

I can definitely identify with the OP though, in the days of very little success I often became disillusioned for long stretches and gave up on my projects before finding the desire to start something new months later. So success definitely makes it easier to love the process, or at least to endure the parts you don't love so much.
 

Paul David

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May I suggest a book called the "The Practicing Mind".

Also Mindset is so important. If you spend a lot time in a negative mindset for this reason or that, you block yourself from seeing the solution to the problem. This creates more problems and you get a snowball effect.
It takes effort at first but it's so important to check yourself when you get in that state of mind and go back to staying positive. Meditation helps with this, because it will make you aware of your thoughts as if you are just watching and you don't get involved in the thought and so you have an opportunity to shift the mental process. Let that negative thought flare up and fizzle out, by just observing yourself.
When you stay positive you think more clearly which results in your creative mind being more available to solve issues that come up constantly in your business, life , etc.
Hope this helps
Z

Finally got around to reading The Practicing Mind this weekend. Here's a particular interesting quote from it.

"Most of us find that we are very good at practicing properly during recreational activities. We perform these activities with all our attention in the present and on what we are doing. What is the difference, then, between work activities and recreational activities?

Why do we find it so much easier to focus on something we consider play than on something we consider work? If we can find answers to these questions, they could help us advance our efforts toward operating in a present-minded state all the time. I have found that the only difference between the two sorts of activities is that we prejudge them.

We make a conscious decision that if we enjoy an activity, it is not work. So we must temporarily suspend our definition of work as referring to our daily vocation. Work, in this discussion, refers to any activity we don’t feel like doing, and though it could certainly include our job duties, or at least parts of them, it could also include any activity that we think is “undesirable.”

We know that this prejudgment of whether an activity is work or play is not universal, because one person’s hobby is another person’s drudgery. Some people love to garden; others don’t even want to cut the grass. I watched a program one evening called The Joy of Snakes. To me, that’s a self-contradictory title, but to the show’s host, it made perfect sense.

The knowledge that we prejudge our activities and then place them into one of the two categories is very powerful. It demonstrates to us that nothing is really work or play. We make an activity into work or play by our judgments. The next time you find yourself doing something that you really don’t feel like doing, stop for a moment and ask yourself why. What is it about the activity that makes you feel that way?

You will find that many times you really can’t put your finger on why you don’t want to do something. You will end up saying, “I just don’t feel like doing this right now.” This implies that what you feel like doing is something else that you have defined as “not work.” You are not in the present but instead are in the future, anticipating another activity."
 
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DavidePaco00

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I try to look at a stoic/zen point of view towards the 'journey'.
You can look forward towards something, but also be in the 'present moment', meaning; not beating yourself up mentally over your external environment.

I don't want to always try to get to the next thing, without actually appreciating what I already have, and that can include struggle.
Exactly , I agree with You. Everyone should have an end goal, without falling in endless mental masturbation wich not only doesn't let You enjoy the moment, but also drains a ton of mental energy.
 

KindlyCutTheCrap

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This is a very intereting discussion - it points to the underlying yearning for starting a business. Partly money, partly avoiding a boss/job that's unpleasant.

What I find works for me when I get despondent about what am I doing here? is to look for the good stuff coming in that I might be overlooking, e.g. did someone make you a cuppa and if so, notice that they took time out of their day to wish you to be more comfortable and at ease. Or, did someone write Thank you in an email, if so, they were showing you how much they appreciated your effort. Or, did the cat sidle up to you and seek your company, if so, they enjoy hanging out with you (they may also be telling you it's dinner time :). Think back to yesterday or today and see whether anyone has done anything at all to make your life more pleasant or comfortable in some way. Simply notice.
 

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