Why can't I get anything done

[Subsonic]

Title.

I am ambitious I set clear goals and I know what I need to do.

Then I go to do something and boom, I'm back to wasting time on YouTube and not getting shit done.

I thought I am just a weak person and training my discipline muscle would fix my problems but that only made a small improvement on my entrepreneurial side.

It truly does feel like some kind of purgatory. I sit here and it feels like there is this potential me sitting next to me and just reminding me of everything I could have, were I just to do what I need to do.

Perhaps this is a lack of true meaning and purpose for me and the fact that the script made me just comfortable enough that I don't need to change anything.

Or it's me being a pussy and whining about my "hard" life.

I am kinda F*cking desperate if it wasn't already obvious.

Even if it would take a real drastic change in my life or it seems unreasonable just tell me if you can think of a solution.

 

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[Runum]

Title.

I am ambitious I set clear goals and I know what I need to do.

Then I go to do something and boom, I'm back to wasting time on YouTube and not getting shit done.

I thought I am just a weak person and training my discipline muscle would fix my problems but that only made a small improvement on my entrepreneurial side.

It truly does feel like some kind of purgatory. I sit here and it feels like there is this potential me sitting next to me and just reminding me of everything I could have, were I just to do what I need to do.

Perhaps this is a lack of true meaning and purpose for me and the fact that the script made me just comfortable enough that I don't need to change anything.

Or it's me being a pussy and whining about my "hard" life.

I am kinda F*cking desperate if it wasn't already obvious.

Even if it would take a real drastic change in my life or it seems unreasonable just tell me if you can think of a solution.

Why aren't you at least creating content on YT rather than watching vids? To me you may be desperate but your level of discomfort isn't high enough yet. You need to share your experience with @Aris Cheese god
It's your responsibility to figure out how to make the phone ring or emails to come in. Good luck.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Social media surfing, IMO, is an undiagnosed addiction. Even I struggle with it as I find myself endlessly scrolling on Twitter.

At some point, you have to decide what is more important in your life, short-term dopamine hits? Or self esteem and self development through bonafide actions and results?

If you need to, subscribe to a social media blocker. Close windows! And make 30 minute goals.

 

[heavy_industry]

It has nothing to do with discipline or being mentally strong / weak etc. Don't try to do a "dopamine detox" or try other gimmicks promoted by self-help youtubers, because that's not where the problem is.

What you lack is true ambition. Intrinsic motivation. Drive.

How do you develop and maintain this drive?
Strong emotions.

Close your eyes and imagine the most wonderful life you could live. Where would you be? What would you do? Who will be there with you? Start visualizing a roadmap from your current situation to your ideal life, and start seeing every day as a step forward in turning your vision into reality.

It may also be useful to create a counter vision for yourself. Use fear and pain to your advantage.
Just imagine the hell that awaits you in a few years if you keep doing what you are doing right now. All your hopes and dreams vanish. Your time lost forever. Would you be willing to endure that?

Here are some useful resources:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKt59HIl8Ok&ab_channel=MJDeMarco

GoalSumo: Supercharge Goal Achievement and Turn Your Big Dreams into Reality

GoalSumo.com intuitively fuses your ambitious goals with daily productivity. Visualize, strategize, and reverse engineer your dream life in just a few short years.

GoalSumo.com.com

 

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[Subsonic]

Social media surfing, IMO, is an undiagnosed addiction. Even I struggle with it as I find myself endlessly scrolling on Twitter.

At some point, you have to decide what is more important in your life, short-term dopamine hits? Or self esteem and self development through bonfide actions and results.

If you need to, subscribe to a social media blocker. Close windows! And make 30 minute goals.

Yeah I thought about the fact that I am clearly addicted a lot.
There was a lot of cope from me to not face the hard choice of whether to just throw yt away.
There are so many insignificant excuses one can make to delay the pain.

But you just putting it like this hit me hard.

I have the choice

Illusory pleasure of a addiction I didn't need before getting hooked. And pain from seeing everything I could have gotten drift away from me.
Or
A lifetime of unscripted freedom and actually archiving my dream of being able to work hard and build something. And pain for 1 to 2 weeks from going cold turkey on any and all Social media or equivalent.

It almost seems easy now.

I'm going to stop now and mark my words, in 2 weeks I'm going post again how my life changed.

Thank you for this reply

 

[Subsonic]

It has nothing to do with discipline or being mentally strong / weak etc. Don't try to do a "dopamine detox" or try other gimmicks promoted by self-help youtubers, because that's not where the problem is.

What you lack is true ambition. Intrinsic motivation. Drive.

How do you develop and maintain this drive?
Strong emotions.

Close your eyes and imagine the most wonderful life you could live. Where would you be? What would you do? Who will be there with you? Start visualizing a roadmap from your current situation to your ideal life, and start seeing every day as a step forward in turning your vision into reality.

It may also be useful to create a counter vision for yourself. Use fear and pain to your advantage.
Just imagine the hell that awaits you in a few years if you keep doing what you are doing right now. All your hopes and dreams vanish. Your time lost forever. Would you be willing to endure that?

Here are some useful resources:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKt59HIl8Ok&ab_channel=MJDeMarco

GoalSumo: Supercharge Goal Achievement and Turn Your Big Dreams into Reality

GoalSumo.com intuitively fuses your ambitious goals with daily productivity. Visualize, strategize, and reverse engineer your dream life in just a few short years.

GoalSumo.com.com

Thanks for the reply.
This is something I have already done and it contributed to this post as this year marks the first part of the 1/5/10 I had set myself and I reached none of the goals I set.

My thing is in fact that I need that dopamine detox as I just realized. No goals and ambitions of the world will bring me anywhere when I spent a average of 5 hours a day on YouTube.

 

[Johnny boy]

Okay then, what are your clear goals?

 

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[Caminsky]

Tearing yourself down isn't going to fix anything. It's OK to call yourself out for counterproductive behaviors, but calling yourself "weak" and a "pussy" won't make it better.

I hit some of the conventional metrics for "success" (though I feel like I need to do MUCH more to be considered "successful"), and I get hung up on analysis paralysis or distractions too. In my opinion, you may need a routine and some guardrails. Personally, I like blocking off time each day for specific tasks (reading and responding to emails, drafting marketing materials, calling clients, etc.) and then using a timer (https://tinyurl.com/j6tj9z2c) to work on longer tasks in intervals (I like 20 on 5 off). If you're still distracted, consider using something like Cold Turkey to block sites like Youtube while you're working.

 

[savefox]

It has nothing to do with discipline or being mentally strong / weak etc. Don't try to do a "dopamine detox" or try other gimmicks promoted by self-help youtubers, because that's not where the problem is.

What you lack is true ambition. Intrinsic motivation. Drive.

How do you develop and maintain this drive?
Strong emotions.

Close your eyes and imagine the most wonderful life you could live. Where would you be? What would you do? Who will be there with you? Start visualizing a roadmap from your current situation to your ideal life, and start seeing every day as a step forward in turning your vision into reality.

It may also be useful to create a counter vision for yourself. Use fear and pain to your advantage.
Just imagine the hell that awaits you in a few years if you keep doing what you are doing right now. All your hopes and dreams vanish. Your time lost forever. Would you be willing to endure that?

Here are some useful resources:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKt59HIl8Ok&ab_channel=MJDeMarco

GoalSumo: Supercharge Goal Achievement and Turn Your Big Dreams into Reality

GoalSumo.com intuitively fuses your ambitious goals with daily productivity. Visualize, strategize, and reverse engineer your dream life in just a few short years.

GoalSumo.com.com

Drive is literally dopamine. Dopamine is what makes you do things. You certainly can increase your motivation and drive by not doing instant gratification activities. Here's a good podcast about it

View: https://youtu.be/QmOF0crdyRU

 

[BizyDad]

kinda F*cking desperate if it wasn't already obvious.

Kinda desperate is clearly not desperate enough, if it wasn't already obvious. Shut up and get to work.

calling yourself "weak" and a "pussy" won't make it better.

Some people are anger motivated. This might not help you, but back in the day, this was definitely something that helped me motivate and stay on task to figure out what I wanted to do in life. And then do it.

Maybe there are healthier ways to motivate, but maybe this self talk is what this dude needs. Who are we to doubt it? Facts are facts, and if these are the facts of his life, it is up to him to accept it or change.

 

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[Caminsky]

Kinda desperate is clearly not desperate enough, if it wasn't already obvious. Shut up and get to work.



Some people are anger motivated. This might not help you, but back in the day, this was definitely something that helped me motivate and stay on task to figure out what I wanted to do in life. And then do it.

Maybe there are healthier ways to motivate, but maybe this self talk is what this dude needs. Who are we to doubt it? Facts are facts, and if these are the facts of his life, it is up to him to accept it or change.

Fair enough.

I'm just saying you're only "weak" and a "pussy" if you accept you are "weak" and a "pussy." I've seen too many people who just accept the things they call themselves at face value and give up. If it works at getting you hyped, then so be it. If I'm being honest, I've definitely told myself "stop being weak" and things like that. But I would say be careful not to let it turn into "I can't make it work because I'm weak."

 

[heavy_industry]

Drive is literally dopamine. Dopamine is what makes you do things.

Yes.
All motivation for anything, as well as voluntary bodily movements are all modulated by dopamine. Without this neurotransmitter you cannot move.

You certainly can increase your motivation and drive by not doing instant gratification activities.

Not exactly.
The reason why those things cause lethargy and lack of motivation is because they form addictions. And the pathophysiology of addiction causes temporary brain impairment.

Removing addictions will slowly allow the brain to return to baseline, but this does not guarantee further increases in motivation (beyond the physiological healthy baseline).

But this is a bad way of looking at things, in my opinion. We are not rats in a lab.


The long term solution is to start viewing "instant gratification" activities like monsters that devour your time, life, dreams and future. Rise above them and conquer your addictions.

Replace the shitty entertainment with a life full of meaning and purpose.

Make your life so interesting, so that watching youtube becomes dull and boring.

 

[Robdavis]

Then I go to do something and boom, I'm back to wasting time on YouTube and not getting shit done.

Even if it would take a real drastic change in my life or it seems unreasonable just tell me if you can think of a solution.

It seems to me that you are likely addicted to Youtube. I was like this a few years ago. Go to easypeasymethod.org and start reading. It is a hackbook for porn. Everywhere it says "porn" just read "Youtube" instead. I know that the content of the videos you are watching on Youtube will be different to porn but it doesn't matter, this method will still work.
The withdrawal symptoms will suck but they pass in a couple of months or so.

 

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[Andy Black]

Social media surfing, IMO, is an undiagnosed addiction. Even I struggle with it as I find myself endlessly scrolling on Twitter.

At some point, you have to decide what is more important in your life, short-term dopamine hits? Or self esteem and self development through bonafide actions and results?

If you need to, subscribe to a social media blocker. Close windows! And make 30 minute goals.

I agree. I don't have any social media apps on my phone. I log in on my desktop, post, reply, and logout fast. I'm not on for long and it's because I use it to post not consume.

I wasn't seeing any traction posting on Twitter so changed the password to something random and logged out. Obviously I can reset the password one day but that's me telling myself I'm done.

I spend a lot of time in the forum and maybe that's an addiction too, but I don't feel dumber afterwards. Writing brings me clarity.

 

[Andy Black]

Some thoughts. Maybe some will resonate.

1) Get early and regular feedback on your business endeavors? Turn your dopamine addiction into an asset.

2) Maybe don't beat yourself up or get tangled up navel gazing? A great line someone once told me was: "F*ck Why. It only holds you back."

3) See your desire to distract yourself as an indication that what you were about to do is important to move you forward. See it as your lizard brain desperately trying to maintain the status quo, and double down on the task with glee.

4) If you had to coach yourself then what would you advise yourself to do? Do that.

5) What will you do to make a sale this week?

 

[Spenny]

How do you develop and maintain this drive?
Strong emotions.

Yes, yes, yes and yes. I do the things I want to do not because I want to, but because I need to otherwise I will not become the visualisation.

If you're struggling reduce the screen time, get minimalist phone (I'm not paid to say this). Its got to be the best £25 I've spent recently - a complete phone overhall, no flashy icons, app limiting apps & blocking capabilities. It's amazing.

 

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[ProcessPro]

Title.

I am ambitious I set clear goals and I know what I need to do.

Then I go to do something and boom, I'm back to wasting time on YouTube and not getting shit done.

I thought I am just a weak person and training my discipline muscle would fix my problems but that only made a small improvement on my entrepreneurial side.

It truly does feel like some kind of purgatory. I sit here and it feels like there is this potential me sitting next to me and just reminding me of everything I could have, were I just to do what I need to do.

Perhaps this is a lack of true meaning and purpose for me and the fact that the script made me just comfortable enough that I don't need to change anything.

Or it's me being a pussy and whining about my "hard" life.

I am kinda F*cking desperate if it wasn't already obvious.

Even if it would take a real drastic change in my life or it seems unreasonable just tell me if you can think of a solution.

Behavior change is tough, especially if you don't understand the science of how behavior works.

The book 'Self Directed Behavior' is really helping me in my own journey - it reads like a college textbook but is the real deal. A more layman's book that may help is 'Tiny Habits'.

A quick tip is that if you're not performing your target behavior, you have to look at what you're doing instead. In this case, like me, you're doing YouTube instead. What has been working for me is totally blocking the problem behavior. Certain times of the day, I have no access to YouTube even if I wanted to. That creates the space I need to do more productive things. Good luck!

Edit: Oh, and YouTube was incredibly tough to block by the way. It's not only designed to be addictive, but is also tough to block. SafeDNS might be the cheapest way to do it across all your devices. Hope this helps.

 

[MaxKhalus]

Title.

I am ambitious I set clear goals and I know what I need to do.

Then I go to do something and boom, I'm back to wasting time on YouTube and not getting shit done.

I thought I am just a weak person and training my discipline muscle would fix my problems but that only made a small improvement on my entrepreneurial side.

It truly does feel like some kind of purgatory. I sit here and it feels like there is this potential me sitting next to me and just reminding me of everything I could have, were I just to do what I need to do.

Perhaps this is a lack of true meaning and purpose for me and the fact that the script made me just comfortable enough that I don't need to change anything.

Or it's me being a pussy and whining about my "hard" life.

I am kinda F*cking desperate if it wasn't already obvious.

Even if it would take a real drastic change in my life or it seems unreasonable just tell me if you can think of a solution.

Sounds like you might want to join the DRVN 30 challenge (google it, it starts on February 1st).

Anyway. No idea what you're trying to do. But if you can't do anything, there's one "trick" that helped me overcome that. It doesn't matter if you hate what you do or its too complex.

The thing about hard work is, once you get going, your brain kinda does it automatically. you just direct it the right way at first, and then it does the work for you. aka flow state.

what I do is simple:
- first get in good work condition (perfect sleep, workout, diet, all the basic boring stuff)
- when you want to work — but don't feel like it— get a piece of paper for a checklist. I use google docs
- write one check box with the most obvious task that you should do that takes ~2 minutes. easy, right?
- you do that, then return to the checklist and repeat with the next obvious action. it's kinda like a journal. only one box at a time

what you'll find after doing this a couple times is that "you don't need as many checkboxes." After the 10th or so, you tend to skip steps because it feels obvious and easy to follow up. that's how I do hard things. works like magic.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

A more layman's book that may help is 'Tiny Habits'.

Yes, nice share, good book, by BJ Fogg. I do recommend as well.

 

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[ZackerySprague]

Social media surfing, IMO, is an undiagnosed addiction. Even I struggle with it as I find myself endlessly scrolling on Twitter.

At some point, you have to decide what is more important in your life, short-term dopamine hits? Or self esteem and self development through bonafide actions and results?

If you need to, subscribe to a social media blocker. Close windows! And make 30 minute goals.

I have this problem as well, the best way I know how to defeat it is by using a social media blocker like MJ states. There's two in particular that do a good job.

1. Freedom.to
2. Cold Turkey Blocker

 

[Subsonic]

So thanks to MJ suggesting it I took a big step back from all social media and cheap dopamine like sweeties or warm showers. I have not watched 1 second of content since writing the earlier post.

The impact is already crazy. I haven't really done anything business related in the last few days due to withdrawal symptoms taking up lots of energy. Yet I have found my old joy for reading fiction again and it's beautiful. I am also reading more or less 200 pages of nonfiction a day now.
Crazy what the mind can do when it's not bombarded by dopamine all the time.

Now I feel motivated for once. I am marveling at the though of doing work.
Best of all, I can just sit and do nothing. I feel like I don't need that stimulation anymore.


Again thank you so much for the suggestion.

(Btw how do you @ a person)

 

[BizyDad]

(Btw how do you @ a person)

@Subsonic type @ and at least the first couple letters of their name, wait a second, and the option to tag them will pop up.

Reading can be helpful, but it doesn't beat taking action. Is there really much difference between YouTube and reading fiction?

 

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[Subsonic]

@Subsonic type @ and at least the first couple letters of their name, wait a second, and the option to tag them will pop up.

Reading can be helpful, but it doesn't beat taking action. Is there really much difference between YouTube and reading fiction?

Yeah thanks for pointing that out.

I consider reading fiction to be better than Youtube since it doesn't kill my ability to focus and improves my reading.
I'd compare it to changing diets. Watching youtube for 5 to 8 hours a day is binge eating junk food. Reading a novel for 1 to 2 hours a day is more like eating a apple as a treat.

But your of course right and I need to get back into taking action.

 

[Subsonic]

Hay muchas razones por las que puedes sentirte incapaz de hacer algo. Algunas de las causas más comunes incluyen:

1. Falta de motivación o interés: Puede ser difícil encontrar la motivación para comenzar un proyecto si no estás emocionado o interesado en él.
2. Ansiedad o depresión: Los trastornos de ansiedad y depresión pueden disminuir la energía y la motivación para hacer cosas.
3. Fatiga o agotamiento: Puede ser difícil encontrar la energía para hacer cosas si te sientes fatigado o agotado.
4. Falta de habilidades o conocimientos: Puede ser difícil hacer algo si no tienes las habilidades o conocimientos necesarios para completar un proyecto.
5. Baja autoestima o confianza en uno mismo: La falta de confianza en tus habilidades o una autoestima baja pueden hacer que te sientas incapaz de hacer cosas.
6. Problemas personales o familiares: Los problemas personales o familiares pueden ser abrumadores y disminuir la motivación para hacer cosas.

Si te sientes incapaz de hacer algo, es importante buscar ayuda profesional si crees que estás experimentando síntomas de ansiedad o depresión. También puedes trabajar en mejorar tu motivación, energía y confianza, y hacer cosas pequeñas que te hagan sentir bien contigo mismo.

A mi me hablo solo un pequeño poco de español pero voy eso texto no es el producto de un humano.

In other words, get outa here with your chatgtp responses.
Seems like noone is going to loose their job because of it just yet. I can smell bot responses from a mile away.

 

[BizyDad]

A mi me hablo solo un pequeño poco de español pero voy eso texto no es el producto de un humano.

In other words, get outa here with your chatgtp responses.
Seems like noone is going to loose their job because of it just yet. I can smell bot responses from a mile away.

Heads up, you can also hit the report button to report spam responses. The admins do a good job catching a lot, but if you see it before they do...

 

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[Subsonic]

Heads up, you can also hit the report button to report spam responses. The admins do a good job catching a lot, but if you see it before they do...

Thanks for the Heads up. I did that just now.

Still, I couldn't stop myself from speaking a bit of Español. It is always a fun time to write in languages one knows at barely A1 level.

 

[strategic seo]

Title.

I am ambitious I set clear goals and I know what I need to do.

Then I go to do something and boom, I'm back to wasting time on YouTube and not getting shit done.

I thought I am just a weak person and training my discipline muscle would fix my problems but that only made a small improvement on my entrepreneurial side.

It truly does feel like some kind of purgatory. I sit here and it feels like there is this potential me sitting next to me and just reminding me of everything I could have, were I just to do what I need to do.

Perhaps this is a lack of true meaning and purpose for me and the fact that the script made me just comfortable enough that I don't need to change anything.

Or it's me being a pussy and whining about my "hard" life.

I am kinda F*cking desperate if it wasn't already obvious.

Even if it would take a real drastic change in my life or it seems unreasonable just tell me if you can think of a solution.

It seems as if you're facing issues with procrastination and lack of self-discipline. Here are some tips that may help:

1. Identify triggers: Try to understand what specifically causes you to procrastinate and avoid those triggers as much as possible.
2. Set achievable goals
3. Create a routine
4. Minimize distractions: Turn off notifications, limit time on social media, and find a quiet place to work.
5. Use accountability: Find a friend or accountability partner who will keep you accountable and help you stay on track.
6. Get enough sleep and exercise: Taking care of your physical health will also improve your mental focus and motivation.
7. Reward yourself: Set rewards for completing tasks and stick to them.

Hope that helps!

 

[Subsonic]

It seems as if you're facing issues with procrastination and lack of self-discipline. Here are some tips that may help:

1. Identify triggers: Try to understand what specifically causes you to procrastinate and avoid those triggers as much as possible.
2. Set achievable goals
3. Create a routine
4. Minimize distractions: Turn off notifications, limit time on social media, and find a quiet place to work.
5. Use accountability: Find a friend or accountability partner who will keep you accountable and help you stay on track.
6. Get enough sleep and exercise: Taking care of your physical health will also improve your mental focus and motivation.
7. Reward yourself: Set rewards for completing tasks and stick to them.

Hope that helps!

Yo I can smell chatgtp again.

Don't bs me, I use that bot for a great deal of school work.

 

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[Subsonic]

So it's been roughly a week I think and I don't even miss Youtube anymore. Crazy how one firm choice can make it so easy.

Now I am feeling much better and I'm actually getting things done. I wanted to learn sales so I got myself and (be it somewhat sketchy) sales position as a setter for a marketing agency.

I wanted to get tougher so I am doing a 1k in a day pushup challenge right now.

Moreover I should have some updates for the soda business as well sometime soon.

Check out that thread if your interested.

 

[Kevin88660]

Title.

I am ambitious I set clear goals and I know what I need to do.

Then I go to do something and boom, I'm back to wasting time on YouTube and not getting shit done.

I thought I am just a weak person and training my discipline muscle would fix my problems but that only made a small improvement on my entrepreneurial side.

It truly does feel like some kind of purgatory. I sit here and it feels like there is this potential me sitting next to me and just reminding me of everything I could have, were I just to do what I need to do.

Perhaps this is a lack of true meaning and purpose for me and the fact that the script made me just comfortable enough that I don't need to change anything.

Or it's me being a pussy and whining about my "hard" life.

I am kinda F*cking desperate if it wasn't already obvious.

Even if it would take a real drastic change in my life or it seems unreasonable just tell me if you can think of a solution.

Are the goals reasonable?

What are the consequences that will happen to you if the reasonable goals are not met?

Religions don’t work without hell. You could set up some simple punishment routine if your daily goals are not met.

Military uses that. Big companies uses that. Amazon tracks the amount of time their staff drinking water and going to the bath room.

Effective execution is about what will happen to you when things are not done. Think along that line and it could be a game changer.