When I was a kid, I strongly believed that fulfilling my dream of becoming a doctor would solve all my problems, that I could finally get the respect and financial status I deserve.
After being bullied at school for years, I built a lot of anger and resentment inside me. I wanted to get revenge and show the world I am able to succeed by myself. Nothing could stop me.
The road was long and arduous but I enjoyed every moment. I studied days and night 7/7, working hectic nightshifts at ER, enduring humiliation by superiors, selective exams...I've never felt like sacrifice even though medical trainees in France are treated like sh*t, paid less than 5$/h and doing the jobs nobody want to do because it is the normal price to pay to get "free" education.
After 11 years of studies I finally graduated last year and started working in public hospital as a fellow Oncologist.
At 28 I fulfilled my dream and I was quite happy. Not because I took revenge on those who looked down on me but because I felt bless I have a job in which I can build genuine and deep human connections with total strangers. Patients with cancer are incredibly resilient and I learn from them as much as I do my best to heal them.
A few months into my new job, I lost interest. Boring 9-6, endless meetings, protocols, lack of perspective, lack of activity, lazy colleagues, suboptimal care due to budget cuts and staff shortage, ridicule pay (3000€/month), had no freedom at all...Bored and depressed about my future, I felt like a failure. I secretly wanted to leave but had no plans and no guts.
Few months ago, an unexpected twist happened. I was kicked out of the hospital because of the vaccine mandate. First I was astonished and sad. I left overnight and nobody care, no message, nothing, I could be dead they wouldn't be touched.
But then I had plenty of time to reflect and I realized that life made me the gift of freedom. It's actually a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. I wasn't happy in that mediocre life, own by my boss, by the hospital, by the society.
Today I'm writing a new chapter of my life. I'm not allowed to practice medicine anymore and I don't care. My freedom of choice prevails over anything else. I'm a lot more than a degree/job. I can reinvent myself. I have nothing to lose, I'm not scared to start from scratch.
This time I will take the driver seat.
I'm still brainstorming ideas of projects but one thing is sure, I want to continue giving support to patients with cancer one way or another.
Technical and scientific progress are exponential and the more treatments are sophisticated the less time is dedicated to holistic approaches (understanding patients' emotional state, diet, physical activities etc).
Patients rarely complaint but if we dig deeper, they all suffer from internal struggles and anxiety that are neglected most of the time. That makes the difference. They need to feel reassured and in control of their disease.
I'm very excited about that new adventure and looking forward to sharing it with you!
Merry Christmas and happy holidays!
After being bullied at school for years, I built a lot of anger and resentment inside me. I wanted to get revenge and show the world I am able to succeed by myself. Nothing could stop me.
The road was long and arduous but I enjoyed every moment. I studied days and night 7/7, working hectic nightshifts at ER, enduring humiliation by superiors, selective exams...I've never felt like sacrifice even though medical trainees in France are treated like sh*t, paid less than 5$/h and doing the jobs nobody want to do because it is the normal price to pay to get "free" education.
After 11 years of studies I finally graduated last year and started working in public hospital as a fellow Oncologist.
At 28 I fulfilled my dream and I was quite happy. Not because I took revenge on those who looked down on me but because I felt bless I have a job in which I can build genuine and deep human connections with total strangers. Patients with cancer are incredibly resilient and I learn from them as much as I do my best to heal them.
A few months into my new job, I lost interest. Boring 9-6, endless meetings, protocols, lack of perspective, lack of activity, lazy colleagues, suboptimal care due to budget cuts and staff shortage, ridicule pay (3000€/month), had no freedom at all...Bored and depressed about my future, I felt like a failure. I secretly wanted to leave but had no plans and no guts.
Few months ago, an unexpected twist happened. I was kicked out of the hospital because of the vaccine mandate. First I was astonished and sad. I left overnight and nobody care, no message, nothing, I could be dead they wouldn't be touched.
But then I had plenty of time to reflect and I realized that life made me the gift of freedom. It's actually a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. I wasn't happy in that mediocre life, own by my boss, by the hospital, by the society.
Today I'm writing a new chapter of my life. I'm not allowed to practice medicine anymore and I don't care. My freedom of choice prevails over anything else. I'm a lot more than a degree/job. I can reinvent myself. I have nothing to lose, I'm not scared to start from scratch.
This time I will take the driver seat.
I'm still brainstorming ideas of projects but one thing is sure, I want to continue giving support to patients with cancer one way or another.
Technical and scientific progress are exponential and the more treatments are sophisticated the less time is dedicated to holistic approaches (understanding patients' emotional state, diet, physical activities etc).
Patients rarely complaint but if we dig deeper, they all suffer from internal struggles and anxiety that are neglected most of the time. That makes the difference. They need to feel reassured and in control of their disease.
I'm very excited about that new adventure and looking forward to sharing it with you!
Merry Christmas and happy holidays!
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