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GOLD! The "Astonishing Secrets" Thread

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MJ DeMarco

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@IceCreamKid and @frieden70

I want to thank you guys from the bottom of my heart. IceCreamKid, your thread made this possible, and your post inspired me immensely. Frieden70, the book you recommended, "The Go-Giver", was awesome. It really went into detail with the "love others more than yourself" idea.

You two changed my life and my way of thinking. I think you set me on a right course. You inspired me to try blogging once more, and to focus on GIVING.

Give, Before You Ask - Alex Lazar

I wrote about you in this post. You don't have to click it. I just thanked you in there once more, and directed people to this thread and to the book.

Thank you once more, I am forever in your debt.
Amazing how many lives one can touch with a post made years ago...

Moreover, @IceCreamKid walks the walk ... no duplicity, no behind the scenes coaching for $10K, no fakeness on Instagram in rented mansions...

Our contributions here have a scope some of us may never understand or realize.
 

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lazaralex

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@frieden70

After I wrote the blog post and my post here, I contacted the authors of "The Go-Giver". Mister Mann asked me to thank you in their name, for the recommendation.

@MJ DeMarco

I completely forgot to thank you for setting up this forum. It's correct that all the others played a key role in my 'revelation'. But what if this forum didn't exist? What if "The Millionaire Fastlane" didn't exist to get me here in the first place? What if Victor never recommended your book on his blog? I hadn't realized until now. There's a lot of people to whom I owe this insight.

Thank you, MJ.
 

AlessioLC

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It's amazing how much i was focused on your advices all this thread, i only slept 2 hours..
I've Read this in one day and i have to say this is amazing, i only registered yesterday and..well let's say that i've been watching GaryVee' videos for a long time so i knew about values and caring about other before yourself, but your thread made it very clear, value above everything.
Then you MUST, at any prices, care first about your customers and your staff. No expectations, just pure love and don't expect to get something in return.
Always think about what you can provide them to feel better (materiel thing or just by discussing with them, giving them advices..)

In my case it's the same thing, quite not simple (Coffee Shop) to add value as the market is nearly full but i'll try to.

So thanks to you guys and MJ for this amazing book, i will get my hands on Unscripted asap!
 
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Alden

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Guys I'm bumping this thread and going to add some advice that I learned from my personal life:

I've read through this gold mine 2-3 times now but didn't get it until NOW. I think I'm understanding what ICK and MJ is coming from when I had my client tell me "Thank you, I can tell you care about your clients.. etc" and a mom tell me what I taught her was super helpful and your boss 1hr telling you that she told her that I was amazing.

What I'm trying to say is I've been a selfish person my ENTIRE LIFE. Like the point where I would withhold information from my friends so I'm better than them, go on dates with girls and not tell them, etc.

I've NEVER been happier in my life than I am now. When someone genuinely thanks you for what you've done, it is the best feeling in the entire world.

The secret is to Give.. because its the most amazing feeling in the world and the key to success. The reason we're here on this planet is to help our fellow man.

If ICK ended this thread after his 2nd Post of loving people, this thread would still be GOLD.
 

BOUM

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Thank you so much for bringing this topic up. I've read it a few months ago and thought I got it, definitely was not the case lol.

Interesting story; I had a talk with someone a few days ago. He mentioned how his family had to postpone some holidays they had dreamed for a long time because they had a new child. Their project was to go for an adventurous trip into the wild.

The project sounded great and I was feeling bad for them. Rather than just saying how that was unfortunate, I tried to understand the constraints and the options to make it possible. Love and help the others to eventually have some ice cream as you'd said. See where I'm going?

There you go an opportunity: organizing adventurous vacations for young parents! Not saying it would work or has never been done. My point is that by trying to help people, you get them to open and your next venture might be there. You'll help them and build your business at the same time, how wonderful is that.

I'm not sure this would have happened if I had not read your thread. Thanks again, I'm looking forward doing this with as many people as possible!
 

Beijing

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....he interviews a guy who discussed the importance of showing physical examples of what your product has to offer. This is far more effective than just throwing ideas out because the customer will then have something that he can see and feel. The value provided appears much more real. Why else do you think Costco gives out all those yummy free samples?

Use the prototype or demonstratable example of your product to validate demand.
This is huge. When I "tell" people about the products I'm working on, their faces express uncertainty and confusion. As if they are not sure if they are talking to a genius or a complete moron. They become hesitant, like they haven't decided how seriously to treat the conversation and are clearly considering beating a retreat.

But when I actually show them a prototype, they realize I'm neither. I'm just a dude with a relatable solution to a problem. The solution isn't complicated or glamorous. It just works. It's something that people who have the problem it solves can easily imagine using. It becomes real and a part of their world when they see the prototype.

It's actually really hard to share the image you have in your mind with other people using just words. "Showing" is almost always better than "telling."
 
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IceCreamKid

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Where might I find this story good sir?
Meh JackEdwards ended up being a questionable member of the forum. There are plenty of others whose story you can follow.

Fox and I are expecting 7-figures in profit next year for our latest venture. Check out his threads, you'll find some solid actionable info in there.
 

Vigilante

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Meh JackEdwards ended up being a questionable member of the forum. There are plenty of others whose story you can follow.

Fox and I are expecting 7-figures in profit next year for our latest venture. Check out his threads, you'll find some solid actionable info in there.
ICK I have missed seeing your "face" around here lately.
 
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IceCreamKid

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ICK I have missed seeing your "face" around here lately.
Progress thread coming early next year. I've been brainstorming how to write it in a format that shows step-by-step processes that users can take immediate action on.

Glad to see you around here, Vig. Lots of new members that I don't recognize here, but it's always nice to see familiar names.
 

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RogueInnovation

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Progress thread coming early next year. I've been brainstorming how to write it in a format that shows step-by-step processes that users can take immediate action on.

Glad to see you around here, Vig. Lots of new members that I don't recognize here, but it's always nice to see familiar names.
Im looking forward to it man, you got a definite reader in me
Nothin sounds better xD
 

Supa

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Progress thread coming early next year. I've been brainstorming how to write it in a format that shows step-by-step processes that users can take immediate action on.

Glad to see you around here, Vig. Lots of new members that I don't recognize here, but it's always nice to see familiar names.
Great to see you back on here ICK :) looking forward to your progress thread. I wish you nothing but the best for your undertakings!
 

papi016

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It's sort of like when you watch a bunch of guys watching sports on TV. When their team wins they start yelling, "YEAAA WE DID IT MAN! WE WON! YEAAAAA". Pshh all they did was watch TV in the living room eating potato chips on the couch. They didn't go through the pain and process that is required to win
Yea I never understood that like yea we lost but we're going do better next time I'm like you didn't do squat
 

BrooklynHustle

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Are you missing that 1% too?

Wouldn't it feel great to know you had the final piece? The final brush strokes on your masterpiece?

Join me in this feeling of creation and completion. Go to Amazon. Download the Boron letters.

Turn to page 125. Now, not tomorrow. This feeling can't wait until tomorrow. Get this feeling now!

(Ok, so you probably picked up my first attempt at copy. At any rate the letters are pure GOLD. Many thanks to the OP and Z.)

...and btw, I'm willing to bet money that page 125 was my missing 1%.
Is this the one?

IMG_2002.PNG
 

Get Right

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BrooklynHustle

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Winner, winner! Last paragraph...changed my life :)
"What is that mistake? The mistake is finding or developing a product FIRST and then looking for a market to sell it to. This is backasswards.

You Must Always Find A Market First... And Then Concentrate On A Product!"

VERY TRUE! :rofl:

Find a market, understand who the customer is, and then focus on their needs to develop your product or service. Words of wisdom.
 

TinyOldLady

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You will become stronger for it and begin having visions of 3 Aston Martins and 12 mistresses in your future(reverse the scenario for female entrepreneurs please!).
Sooo... 3 mistresses and 12 Aston Martins for female entrepreneurs?


(Haha, I hope I am the first to make this hilarious joke :hilarious:) Thank you for your thread and congratulation on your success
 

ZF Lee

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This is one of the few threads here I can never finish reading....

I would like to finish them, but I am afraid binge-reading might be action-fake.

Still, I did reach some of @IceCreamKid's pointers on picking the damn phone and needs-orientated focus in real life, and on Upwork and Quora.

Thanks for the ice-cream, and Merry Christmas!
 

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ZF Lee

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When Mark Cuban cashed out and became a billionaire he told all of his family and friends, "I'm still the same guy. If you treat me any differently then we're going to have to end this relationship". He even did this to family members.
F*ck!
5 pages in and I fall upon this good trick to chase away moneychasing relatives and friends.

All my life, being 'too generous' to 'friends' have been the bane of my family. In good times, they snuggle up to you, but in bad, well, you get crickets. No help at all.

And I wonder why I live in a middle-class mediocrity setting today.

I won't want to stay there, but if there is one threat to expect in the future, that might be this.

Cuban's a billionaire for making some pretty good decisions in life...
 

Zedd9165

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Soo much of information in here. I might never finish reading this thread.

Its a good point that OP pointed out that the moment we stop thinking about money is when we start making money.
 

ZF Lee

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Silence can be AMAZINGLY powerful.

People, in general, are uncomfortable with it. They fill that void even with stuff they never meant to say.

Next time you get told "no" for something (anything), just wait in silence for a few seconds, say 3-5 seconds - count it in your head as you wait. I bet you'll find they start speaking again about the reasons why it's a "no", what you need to get a "yes", what other people have done, etc... it just starts pouring out as a defence mechanism against silence.
And SPACING. That's for copy.

Something I learned here and on Quora.

Give enough spacing between your chunks of info so that your readers or customers can think and digest well enough.

I hate newspaper ads because they are all messed-up walls of text. Sometimes I find this shit too in some e-commerce websites I troll across to get copywriting research done.
 

OMDA

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Thank you IceCreamKid and the other contributors to this thread.

I've been reading it as much as possible the past few days, and it has already started to change me.

My head has been so far up my own a$$ on self importance, the technical details of what I want to do, and the other things that had me spend a few years of action faking. E.g. building an app with this framework, with this language, building a site in the most godawful complicated way because my ego was attached to the technicality of it. Talk to friends about getting a business running. Never talking to actual customers. Never checking if I'm actually solving big problems.

The seed was initially planted when I read Zig Ziglar. That's when I realized that my attitude, being driven by the wrong reasons, was hurting me the most. But, seeing the commentary here and visualizing what ICK has been talking about had a stronger impression than Ziglar.

...an anology about ego...

When I was in college I went to school in engineering so I was surrounded by other dudes all the time. Naturally, I wanted to meet girls and would think about it a lot. Somehow, a random event got me in with a really cool group that did dancing, and I worked my a$$ off multiple days a week to get good.

I got what I wanted - to meet girls - but I was still, at the core, driven by the wrong things. I'd show up at dances with a goal of getting 'leads' (numbers). It didn't matter if we vibed or not, I'd get a high from that number and then try to close the sale (get a date).

Girls will hand out phone numbers without much effort just to get you to go away. I was spending very little time connecting with them. Sure, we could dance well and all of that, but back in my head I was trying to figure out a way to expedite that number-getting. Not enjoying my time with them and ensuring they enjoyed that time as well.

And, surprise! I was just getting numbers for the sake of getting numbers. I wasn't solving their problem, of wanting to actually connect with someone. I was trying to solve MY OWN PROBLEM, but just dressing it up nicely. And I ended up in relationships that were not good. Because I was focused on myself. Not what good I could bring into the world. Not how great I could actually make someone feel, but I was tripping up on my own ego and tying it to what I got out of it.


That ego-driven life is on its way out. Last week, giddy from reading this thread and a few others, I went out dancing. Sometime during the night I realized that I was much less focused on myself. I was asking people more questions, I was enjoying just seeing them enjoy themselves. LISTENING MORE. I didn't even care about getting numbers. I just wanted to have good interactions with people. There's just something about making pretty girls even happier that is addictive.

Then, my buddy came up to me. I noticed how intentively he was listening to our conversation. He was also asking me for more detail about what I thought about the music. It turns out he was trying to improve what others got out of his own music. I got really excited about this, because he was trying really hard to understand exactly what I enjoyed about the music. His desire was genuine. This made me want to help him even more. He's a smalltime guy trying to make sure the people that listen to him have a good time.

Normally, I don't talk to the guys that much because, hey, we're here to meet girls right? But that kind of attitude has blinded me to helping others out in ways that I can't imagine. Because I was blind to it. Yet, here I was, ignoring the girls around me because I saw that I could help my buddy out with his problem.

That was one of my best nights out in a while, because I was high on the effect I had on people. The chip on my shoulder wasn't there. I was too focused on making sure others had a good time that I couldn't think about my own issues.

I want to give people that feeling of enjoyment! Let's get that ice cream!
 

A1988

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My brother, this post of yours hurts me deeply because you remind me of a younger version of myself. It hurts me to see others go through such pain.

Do you know why you're hurt? I'll tell you why...a lot of your hurt comes from the expectations you have placed on others not being met. Learn to love people AS THEY ARE. Not for who you expect them to be. That is the Dolphin way.

Listen…you can bounce back from this. I was depressed for a while. I hated people…I had so much hurt and anguish inside of me. I couldn’t even get the energy to get out of bed at one point. The desert of desertion is no joke. It's soooo painful. I don't wish it on anyone, even George Bush. Self-doubt sneaks up and starts whispering at you. Your confidence gets shaken up. A bad experience leaves a scar. Maybe fear creeps in. Or stress. Or fatigue. Or frustration.

· I spent $5k developing a mobile app and ended up with zero sales.

· I got scammed out of $6k by a real estate “guru”

· My ex-girlfriend stole $7k from me, left me then got a boob job right after

· I started a property management company that failed because I didn’t have a USP and I didn’t know about writing copy yet

· I got cheated on in every relationship I’ve ever had because I didn’t know what to look for in a woman just yet

· Parents kept telling me to get a job

· I couldn’t keep a job long term because I couldn’t stand a**hole bosses

Somewhere down the line, you begin to discover that all of the challenges in your life are designed specifically to strengthen weaknesses within your character.

Be grateful for all of those challenges. The a**hole boss, the bitch that betrayed you after you gave her your heart, the “friends” who took advantage of you…they were all there to help you become a stronger version of yourself.

Be thankful for them. Love them for what they did for you.

They say nice guys finish last, but they usually finish with a good wife and a wicked savings account.

Never give up…this is one of the key secrets of the Dolphin. Mindset is everything. Once you have the right mindset, the ice cream gods in the sky will smile down upon you while rainbow skittles and rainbow sherbet will begin falling from the clouds.

Don't give up.
I'm at work right now, dreading this night shift. Thank god for this thread and your writing style, I love it! I'm working at a Lab in the hospital, hating the shift work and realizing that I do not have any skill set besides "lab related" work. I am definitely buying the book you have recommended on copywriting, it'll definitely be a start to a new skill set. Do you recommend anything else? Even though this post is relatively old, its GOLDEN! I guess in the fast lane forums, the ice cream doesn't melt! @IceCreamKid, your theory to TRULY loving others isn't the first time it has crossed my path. I have read many books and listened to many life coaches (my favorite being Jim Rohn), and they have preached this over and over. I believe you 100%. Sadly though, I haven't been able to get to this level yet. This post specifically resonates with me as I as well have a hard time accepting people for who they are. But, you're definitely right! I need to re-wire my mindset!

Thanks for taking the time to start this thread and share your abundance of wisdom, love, and kindness (oh ya and your humour) to all. Also, thanks to everyone else who has shared their insights as well! This forum rocks! I hope to start my entrepreneurial journey somewhere, as I'm still looking for an idea that interests me.

Keep on Scooping out the ice cream brotha! One Love!
 

A1988

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Omg z********* just told me that I rock. I wasn’t planning on posting here for a few days because I’m super busy running the ice cream machines, but I just had to respond to his post and drop more ice cream on the floor. I’m here to serve all of you and help you shift your mindset so here is some additional ice cream.

We here at the ice cream shop operate by a different set of beliefs from most others. This goes a bit deeper than the CENTS formula. Our beliefs are in no way original…we found them while sailing the Pacific Ocean when we stumbled upon an underwater city called Oceania, where many Dolphins are swimming around. They didn’t realize it at the time during our conversations, but we were secretly reading in between the lines to dissect the deeper meaning behind why the Dolphins were successful. We found that the only thing that separated the Dolphins from all the other creatures in Oceania was their mindset. I took some notes and locked them in a treasure chest to be brought with me back to Candy Land. I never intended to share such notes, as they contain the deepest secrets of the Dolphin…but I asked him how I could repay him for what he’d done for me and he told me to share the ice cream with others.

This is what we believe in the ice cream shop…

We truly believe in our hearts that we have the ability to achieve anything that we put our minds to, therefore we demand persistent daily action towards achieving such goals. We are deeply rooted in reality and do not mentally masturbate. We threw all of the excuses in the trash can. A few bums found the list of excuses in the trash and started using them, but that’s their choice.

We realize that whatever dominating thoughts inside of us will eventually manifest itself outward into physical reality. We must never let the negative gremlins in Candy Land allow their comments to dominate our thoughts. If this happens, it’s game over.

We believe that a true ice cream shop cannot last long term unless it offers honest and fair ice cream to the people. Therefore, all of our transactions must benefit EVERYONE involved. There is no selfishness in the ice cream shop.

We convince others to serve us ice cream because we will FIRST serve them, with zero attachment to our personal gain. We get them to believe in us because we believe in them first.

We are very conscious of our health. We have a big focus on cardio and weightlifting, thanks to PatrickP. Online we eat lots of ice cream and take shots of tequila every 15 minutes, but in the real world we don't take any ice cream because sweets spike our insulin. Spiked insulin is what causes diabetes and make us feel tired. We need high energy within ourselves to run the ice cream shops. Good health is vital.

We believe that the real price of achieving mountains of ice cream is hard work. There are no shortcuts in Candy Land. There are bicycles, cars, and skateboards to get you to your location faster, but there are no shortcuts.

Lastly, it was never about the ice cream. It’s about loving people and removing the pains from their lives at a massive scale. The ice cream and alcohol is simply a byproduct of the value the ice cream shops bring to Candy Land.

Shift your mindset. Work hard. Expect more from yourself.

I think my biggest mindset shift was when I realized that I was my own biggest obstacle.

Master yourself. Master your fears, your bad habits, your insecurities.

Dude...that's the crazy thing about entrepreneurship. After you're done mentally masturbating over inspirational quotes and you finally start taking action, all of the insecurities and fears that you hide from will come to the surface. That's where the real warrior either comes through or retreats back into mental masturbation mode.

In business, you alone are responsible for your results. There's nothing to hide behind...you can't blame your boss, the economy, whatever. You are responsible and you are your own greatest obstacle.

Try to speed through the mental masturbation phase fast and get the ice cream asap. You'll like the person you become.

Come learn the moves so you can dance with us at the ice cream shop. We got better music than MTV and Coachella...dude, why doesn't MTV play music anymore btw? That's pretty whack.

Man you got some great writing style, Love it brotha! This is some Jim Rohn S**T right here though. Keep preaching my man.
 
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Xeon

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Want to say thanks to ICK!

The plot twist about Zen and Jack were unexpected though! I guess the important lesson is always be skeptical and cynical and question, question and doubt.
(who knows, maybe MJ is Tai Lopez and the guy we saw on the youtube MJ channel is just a guy whom Tai hired on Fiverr for US$15).

Thanks again ICK!
 

A. Rodriguez

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The greatest lesson of all...

LOVE THE HELL OUT OF OTHERS AND YOU WILL EVENTUALLY HAVE ALL THE ICE CREAM YOU CAN EAT.

The hell? This is a @zen******* secret? It is, and let me prove to you why.

When you love others with a genuine heart, you become more present to their feelings which include their pains and needs. You approach them from the position of, “How can I improve this person’s life? How can I add value to this person’s life?” as opposed to, “Where can I get money? COME ON GIVE ME THE MONEY!”.

This is the mindset I see a lot of people have: “The XYZ market is a $50B market and is about to explode 30% within the next 2 years. I’m going to get into that and get a piece of the pie!”. The ice cream shop has the right to refuse service to anyone and does not serve those with that mindset. We only serve ice cream to those who love others and solve their pains. Well, maybe we’ll offer plain vanilla to the 99% who don’t.

Do you think someone will tell you their pains and needs if you genuinely show them that you want to help improve their lives? Or are they more likely to tell you their pains if you approach them from the angle of, “Hey would you buy this product from me? Come on, buy it!”

When you love the hell out of others, you begin building a brand with a noticeable heart. Customers WILL notice this and you will develop a loyal following. They will tell their friends and post it all over Facebook. You notice how In n’ Out Burger has a loyal following of fans? That’s because they show love for their employees and love for their customers by striving to always satisfy everyone’s needs. It’s a hamburger joint with a friggin’ culture. I love it. The employees are always joyful as hell. The company has HEART and SOUL. Compare that to the majority of other fast food joints who are just a cold cash taker.

Sometimes it’s not always about profit. Love others first and the ice cream will come.

I’ve never met zen******* in person but his whole vibe OOZES of love, heart, honor, and integrity. He wants to help you better your life. He doesn’t fear the success of those he mentors. I would trust that guy with a $100,000 personal loan. He obviously doesn’t need my money, but you get my point. I bet you a bunch of people bring him deals and opportunities to partner up simply because of his vibe of love and integrity.

Love others. Drop the greed because it will blind you to opportunities for more ice cream around you. When you harness this mindset for a long enough amount of time, you will see the abundance of possibilities and realize the ice cream is everywhere. Fear and scarcity WILL be replaced by confidence and abundance.

@JackEdwards wasn't lying when he said, "The moment you stop caring about money is the moment you start making money". Respect to you, good sir.
I've tried and tried to understand this thread @IceCreamKid but i don't seem to get the idea of what you're saying. What's the mindset you're talking about and what exactly does the Ice Cream represent. Please elaborate for me. Thanks
 
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Wolfman

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The greatest lesson of all...

LOVE THE HELL OUT OF OTHERS AND YOU WILL EVENTUALLY HAVE ALL THE ICE CREAM YOU CAN EAT.

The hell? This is a @zen******* secret? It is, and let me prove to you why.

When you love others with a genuine heart, you become more present to their feelings which include their pains and needs. You approach them from the position of, “How can I improve this person’s life? How can I add value to this person’s life?” as opposed to, “Where can I get money? COME ON GIVE ME THE MONEY!”.

This is the mindset I see a lot of people have: “The XYZ market is a $50B market and is about to explode 30% within the next 2 years. I’m going to get into that and get a piece of the pie!”. The ice cream shop has the right to refuse service to anyone and does not serve those with that mindset. We only serve ice cream to those who love others and solve their pains. Well, maybe we’ll offer plain vanilla to the 99% who don’t.

Do you think someone will tell you their pains and needs if you genuinely show them that you want to help improve their lives? Or are they more likely to tell you their pains if you approach them from the angle of, “Hey would you buy this product from me? Come on, buy it!”

When you love the hell out of others, you begin building a brand with a noticeable heart. Customers WILL notice this and you will develop a loyal following. They will tell their friends and post it all over Facebook. You notice how In n’ Out Burger has a loyal following of fans? That’s because they show love for their employees and love for their customers by striving to always satisfy everyone’s needs. It’s a hamburger joint with a friggin’ culture. I love it. The employees are always joyful as hell. The company has HEART and SOUL. Compare that to the majority of other fast food joints who are just a cold cash taker.

Sometimes it’s not always about profit. Love others first and the ice cream will come.

I’ve never met zen******* in person but his whole vibe OOZES of love, heart, honor, and integrity. He wants to help you better your life. He doesn’t fear the success of those he mentors. I would trust that guy with a $100,000 personal loan. He obviously doesn’t need my money, but you get my point. I bet you a bunch of people bring him deals and opportunities to partner up simply because of his vibe of love and integrity.

Love others. Drop the greed because it will blind you to opportunities for more ice cream around you. When you harness this mindset for a long enough amount of time, you will see the abundance of possibilities and realize the ice cream is everywhere. Fear and scarcity WILL be replaced by confidence and abundance.

@JackEdwards wasn't lying when he said, "The moment you stop caring about money is the moment you start making money". Respect to you, good sir.
What is "zen...."'s thread/forum.
I like your vibe Ice and I agree w/ everything you said so far (hahaha) Thanks, Greg
 

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