Does anyone REALLY wake up excited in the morning?

[PapaGang]

Man, you are a full of limiting beliefs.

Why does there have to be a reason to do what you’re doing if you’re just trying to find reasons to be fulfilled or to help.

Here’s an example that me and @JasonR did two years ago. There were these two potholes in the road. And we just got tired of slowing down every time we came to the pothole.

So one day me and Jason went to a store and bought 10 bags of gravel, and picked up a bunch of rocks on the side of the road, put them in our truck and filled the potholes.

While we were filling the potholes many cars drove by and asked us if we worked for the road department. We said no we were just filling potholes. And almost everybody thanked us for doing so because they were sick of driving over these two potholes also.

We probably spent $100 and two hours of backbreaking work to complete this. No financial gain for us, but every time we go back to this road it’s nice to see that our filling job is still there. Almost nobody will know why one day those potholes disappeared. Sometimes you just pick a project and do it and be fulfilled.

Below is Jason filling the hole.
View attachment 44336

Below top pic is the pothole filled on day 1 and the bottom pic is a year later when we returned.
View attachment 44337

That's the magic right there.

 

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[PapaGang]

A little THC helps me sleep through the night. I don’t take it all the time, maybe once a week. A half dose like 5mg or even 2.5mg.

That's about my frequency. Once a week. I don't like depending on anything to help me sleep, but every once in awhile I need to get some deep sleep, and it works wonders.

 

[srodrigo]

This thread is a good reminder that being goals-oriented is not so good. Goals are the checkpoints, not the real deal.

Problem #3 on this blog post explains the issue with goals quite well Forget About Setting Goals. Focus on This Instead.

 

[SteveO]

Anything you can share about this would be appreciated.

This guy hiked up a steep trail loaded with sharp rocks without shoes. Everyone that walked past us looked strangely at him. Most commented. Some of the fine ladies on the trail took notice of this fine looking, tall and shoeless person strolling up the side of the mountain.

Since then, I go shoeless on occasion. Trying to toughen them up but arizona is an inhospitable place for that.

 

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[Get Right]

Hello @MTF, very thought provoking thread, thank you! I always like reading your posts regardless of topic.

I have a few years under my belt so I have wrestled with a lot of these topics. I don't necessarily wake up REALLY excited but its pretty close. All of us have bad days and even years but my average is much further on the excited scale. I just really want to see what happens next. This may come from my highest core values of Faith, Family and Freedom.

You mentioned :

I once wanted to figure out a way to run a business that would support the environment somehow (similar to your model with Max and Neo) but can't figure out what kind of a business would make sense for reforestation efforts. I guess I could do whatever and simply donate a portion of profits but that would be too boring.

There are soooo many ways for you to do this!...and the world needs it badly! Here is an example within one of my favorite charities UMCOR:

Global Ministries - Agricultural Development Program Nigeria Episcopal Area

With your skills I could see you forming a company (maybe like a TOMS model) to take on this issue directly. Design the model to reinforce YOUR core values and share this with the world. Hell, I'm getting excited about it right now!

 

[MTF]

And I got COVID. Maybe that was a part of the reason why I've been feeling so shitty the last few days.

Anything you can share about this would be appreciated.

Feel free to reach out via a private message and I'll answer any questions you have.

This thread is a good reminder that being goals-oriented is not so good. Goals are the checkpoints, not the real deal.

Problem #3 on this blog post explains the issue with goals quite well Forget About Setting Goals. Focus on This Instead.

That's why I don't want to just set another goal and hope it'll make me happy (because it won't) as I agree with James that you can't live from goal to goal. Many posts in this thread suggest to have new goals and I don't think that's the right answer as I don't want to be dependent on having goals to feel okay.

This guy hiked up a steep trail loaded with sharp rocks without shoes. Everyone that walked past us looked strangely at him. Most commented. Some of the fine ladies on the trail took notice of this fine looking, tall and shoeless person strolling up the side of the mountain.

Since then, I go shoeless on occasion. Trying to toughen them up but arizona is an inhospitable place for that.

Lol I don't remember any fine ladies.

Hello @MTF, very thought provoking thread, thank you! I always like reading your posts regardless of topic.

Thanks for your comment. I appreciate it.

There are soooo many ways for you to do this!...and the world needs it badly! Here is an example within one of my favorite charities UMCOR:

Global Ministries - Agricultural Development Program Nigeria Episcopal Area

With your skills I could see you forming a company (maybe like a TOMS model) to take on this issue directly. Design the model to reinforce YOUR core values and share this with the world. Hell, I'm getting excited about it right now!

I considered something like that. I'll look more into it.

 

[SteveO]

Lol I don't remember any fine ladies.

Then you either weren't looking or we have a different definition.

I've been told that hike is like a singles meeting place.

 

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[ZackerySprague]

Does anyone honestly wake up excited in the morning?

If so, what do you do?

I've always felt that this whole "create the life you can't wait to wake up to" is bullshit propagated by self-help gurus and maybe only lived by abnormally happy people who have some kind of a genetic make-up to feel like that most of the time.

No, not really. In the morning, I work as a product implementation specialist installing software for a company that I am employed. In the evening, I am working on learning Web Design & SEO. I have a potential small project from a family member, so that's exciting!

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Based on what you've written, @MTF, would this be an ideal life for you?

1) Expat to Costa Rica or some other tropical land with above average tourism.

2) Open a combined public animal rescue (charity/donations) and plant-based airBnb (for profit)... your human customers who stay with you are people who love animals and the story behind their rescue.

3) Hire competent management that allows you to swim, surf, and dive any day of the year.

4) Never visit social media again, except for your marketing manager who manages the property's account.

 

[Itizn]

My most optimistic time of the day is actually in bed, late at night, when I'm getting ready to check out.

 

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[Rabby]

How will money pour into this? I generally see ideas like these completely against the current trends since everyone would rather chop up the land into small plots and build houses there. I don't see a sustainable, for-profit way to do this because there's no financial incentive here.

Profit attracts capital. So if you could prove that building stable, nature-friendly ecosystems is profitable, you'll attract capital to the concept. The nature god/ess, whoever that might be, will surely be relieved.

That said, social status also attracts capital, and can probably be thought of as equivalent to material profit (and the two are convertible to some extent anyway). So if you became well known and respected for saving / replanting forests, and enjoyed social benefits as such, that would likely attract capital to the concept as well.

@MJ DeMarco 's answer is directional... it proposes some possible ways to overcome the obstacles you mentioned. The obstacles are real, but the life-engineering process benefits a lot from having the habit of thinking about how to do it anyway.

Anyway, nobody ever sees how "it" can be done... until they do. I clearly remember the conversations about how nobody would ever buy anything on the Internet. And later how nobody would ever take classes online, etc. Finding the way is just part of the experiment. And, it can be fun.

Could you share any specifics? What do you plan to do?

Just buy acres and share it with the trees and insects and birds and mammals. It serves the additional purpose of being a retreat in case Democracy is upgraded to its ultimate form, Pan-Continental Riot and Insurrection. Much rather enjoy that from the deep woods with running water, a boiler, enough equipment to sustain the property, and some food in the ground.

It's likely that I'll experiment with the forest farm concept too, and test some sustainable energy and resilient living things that might or might not ever become products.

That's why I don't want to just set another goal and hope it'll make me happy (because it won't) as I agree with James that you can't live from goal to goal. Many posts in this thread suggest to have new goals and I don't think that's the right answer as I don't want to be dependent on having goals to feel okay.

I agree with this. I hardly use "goals," and when I do I probably fall short or reach them long after I meant to reach them. Even if I do hit a goal on time, I don't get any satisfaction out of it. If you reach a goal, now you have nothing to do. It's like starting over.

Personally, I do better just trying to increase, decrease, or change something over time. If I set a goal to make $2,000,000 in one year, I likely would not reach that goal. Why should I care about 12 months from now Rabby anyway? Future Rabbys always think past Rabbys are stupid... I'm not about to donate $2,000,000 to one of those jerks.

But if I set a habit with the intent of accelerating sales, or wealth, or better yet something I care about (producing valuable things, or inventions, or solving problems for people who appreciate having their problems trouble-shooted), my chance of hitting what otherwise would have been a dead-end "goal" goes way up. Part of it is the dynamic nature of setting a habit, routine, or focus instead of just a static goal. And maybe part of it is that goals are an incomplete form of motivation because they're always in the future... they haven't been through the engineering process and daily or weekly revision cycles based on actual observed results... to their detriment.

So yeah, don't set a goal. Think about what you want to get closer to, or what you want to do more of, or have more of. And think about the routines or activities that are likely to bring whatever that is and you closer together. The routines, the habit, the daily focus... those are the reward. The "end" where we supposedly take a bath in dopamine and sit around doing nothing with a fancy drink, is ephemeral, and often disappointing. The work itself is the reward, if it's moving you in the direction you want to move in, or making things more and more the way you want them to be.

 

[MTF]

Based on what you've written, @MTF, would this be an ideal life for you?

1) Expat to Costa Rica or some other tropical land with above average tourism.

2) Open a combined public animal rescue (charity/donations) and plant-based airBnb (for profit)... your human customers who stay with you are people who love animals and the story behind their rescue.

3) Hire competent management that allows you to swim, surf, and dive any day of the year.

4) Never visit social media again, except for your marketing manager who manages the property's account.

I actually have had something similar in my mind for a few years already.

1. I've been looking for the right place for me. Still want to visit a few places more for comparison. Also, each place I visit gives me a better idea of what I like/dislike, of the potential opportunities, how everyday lifestyle would be like, etc.

2. I thought about the Airbnb, not about the animal rescue. But instead of the animal rescue I'd want to start a non-profit that reforests the island/region where I would live. That would make a big impact locally and would be easier to manage and be less heart-breaking than caring for sick animals.

3. That makes a lot of sense, too. My limiting belief is not trusting others and not wanting to hire people but I guess I eventually have to let it go as it's a big limiting factor.

4. If I could never spend any time marketing anything, I'd love that. Hiring a marketing manager would definitely be a good way to do it.

Thanks for laying it out like that as it gave me some food for thought.

 

[MTF]

Profit attracts capital. So if you could prove that building stable, nature-friendly ecosystems is profitable, you'll attract capital to the concept. The nature god/ess, whoever that might be, will surely be relieved.

Three examples that I know of that get capital (I'd appreciate if you know of anything else):

1. The Heart of England Forest | Heart of England Forest (started by Felix Dennis, the author of How to Get Rich) is, to my knowledge, the greatest example of a large scale reforestation effort managed by one organization. It doesn't really have a business aspect to it but from what I see, it's incredibly well managed.

England is terribly deforested. At 23% of the way towards the foundation's final goal of forest area (30,000 acres), they're already England’s largest new native woodland.

2. Support Sustainable Biodiverse Forests with SUGi. I talked a few times with the founder and she's really dialed in as she has business experience and runs this as a for-profit (that's what her mentors advised her to do instead of starting a non-profit).

To me, this is much less inspiring though because they plant tiny forests and mostly in urban areas. While I understand the need for it, no large animals will live in these forests so it's mostly a place for insects and some small urban animals.

3. Afforestt (I'm getting some antivirus notification when trying to visit it now) is the organization from which I learned the Miyawaki method of planting native, fast-growing forests. As far as I know they're making money consulting with big businesses that want to plant forests on their corporate lands plus they make some money (but I can't imagine it being much) on forest creation workshops.

I skipped various well-known reforestation organizations that plant thousands of random trees all over the world (often non-native ones) as I don't like this model and don't think it's the right way forward.

That said, social status also attracts capital, and can probably be thought of as equivalent to material profit (and the two are convertible to some extent anyway). So if you became well known and respected for saving / replanting forests, and enjoyed social benefits as such, that would likely attract capital to the concept as well.

What do you mean by social status? Like good PR for corporations? Or people sharing online that they "planted" 50 trees because they donated to a non-profit?

Anyway, nobody ever sees how "it" can be done... until they do. I clearly remember the conversations about how nobody would ever buy anything on the Internet. And later how nobody would ever take classes online, etc. Finding the way is just part of the experiment. And, it can be fun.

Yeah that makes sense. I've always been more of a copy kind of a guy (just copy what's already out there and working) so trying to see solutions where they aren't available is much harder for me.

Just buy acres and share it with the trees and insects and birds and mammals. It serves the additional purpose of being a retreat in case Democracy is upgraded to its ultimate form, Pan-Continental Riot and Insurrection. Much rather enjoy that from the deep woods with running water, a boiler, enough equipment to sustain the property, and some food in the ground.

It's likely that I'll experiment with the forest farm concept too, and test some sustainable energy and resilient living things that might or might not ever become products.

That's cool. I'd like to own such a house in Poland and another somewhere warm, then split my time between these two (Poland spring-summer, fall-winter elsewhere, plus some traveling in between).

If you reach a goal, now you have nothing to do. It's like starting over.

Exactly, that's why I'd rather move away from this. In my mind, living this way ensures that you'll never live in the present. You'll always be waiting for some goal to make you happy only to enjoy a fleeting moment of satisfaction and back to setting another goal and doing the same thing again.

So yeah, don't set a goal. Think about what you want to get closer to, or what you want to do more of, or have more of. And think about the routines or activities that are likely to bring whatever that is and you closer together. The routines, the habit, the daily focus... those are the reward. The "end" where we supposedly take a bath in dopamine and sit around doing nothing with a fancy drink, is ephemeral, and often disappointing. The work itself is the reward, if it's moving you in the direction you want to move in, or making things more and more the way you want them to be.

100%. I'm glad you could explain my thoughts way better than I could.

 

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[Nick Kadutskyi]

The most effect I got from sunlight exposure in the morning, cold shower and waking up at the same time.

My protocol:

• I'll get up and go straight to the shower. Hot at first and then cold for 1-3 minutes.
• After that I go for a 10-20 min walk to get some sun.
• Waking up at the same time helps a lot too.

Cold shower creates a wide ark of dopamine that helps to stay excited/motivated.
10-20 minute sun exposure helps to tell your brain that it is morning and that the body needs to kick in some more cortisol to consolidate energy for the day.
Waking up at the same time helps to establish your circadian rhythms. Body temperature starts to go up 2 hours before you usually wake up and its pick is about 2-4 hours after waking up. So if you constantly shift your sleep schedule you might feel like shit in the morning because your body temperature is low.
Getting more Cortisol, Adrenaline (Epinephrine) helps to raise the temperature in the morning and get more energy.

All of those activities are aimed to raise body temperature and tell your body that it should be active.

Additional things.
Sometime I'll go to the gym or for a run in the morning. It waste times but after some physical activity I feel much more energetic.
Coffee. It's great to impose even more stress through adrenaline (You need strep to take action). But keep it in control during the day. Consuming caffeine in any form late in a day (after 2ish p.m.) will F*ck up your sleep which is much more important.
Alcohol significantly F*cks up your sleep. You will get up constantly (even if you don't remember) and will feel shittier in the morning.
Goal setting. Getting up and having all the tasks for today in a list was helpful for me, at least I didn't waste much time in the morning planning tasks for today.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

I actually have had something similar in my mind for a few years already.

1. I've been looking for the right place for me. Still want to visit a few places more for comparison. Also, each place I visit gives me a better idea of what I like/dislike, of the potential opportunities, how everyday lifestyle would be like, etc.

2. I thought about the Airbnb, not about the animal rescue. But instead of the animal rescue I'd want to start a non-profit that reforests the island/region where I would live. That would make a big impact locally and would be easier to manage and be less heart-breaking than caring for sick animals.

3. That makes a lot of sense, too. My limiting belief is not trusting others and not wanting to hire people but I guess I eventually have to let it go as it's a big limiting factor.

4. If I could never spend any time marketing anything, I'd love that. Hiring a marketing manager would definitely be a good way to do it.

Thanks for laying it out like that as it gave me some food for thought.

Perhaps this is your “next big thing”, like buying your parents a home.

Yes, we’re all gonna die and long term, stuff might seem meaningless. But we’re also living right now. So why not make the best of this brief existence, and leave without regret, saying. “I tried to make a mark on this world when I was there AND I was damn happy doing it.”

 

[Paul David]

Yes but only if I'm on holiday in a warm country.

 

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[MTF]

Perhaps this is your “next big thing”, like buying your parents a home.

Yes, we’re all gonna die and long term, stuff might seem meaningless. But we’re also living right now. So why not make the best of this brief existence, and leave without regret, saying. “I tried to make a mark on this world when I was there AND I was damn happy doing it.”

I'll strategize on this once I'm back to normal. Thank you for your advice.

 

[MTF]

Yes but only if I'm on holiday in a warm country.

Any updates on this front as to moving to Spain or elsewhere?

 

[Paul David]

Any updates on this front as to moving to Spain or elsewhere?

No unfortunately not.

Still working on growing my saas. The children are at the wrong ages to move (12 and 14) and now England is no longer in the EU means it’s very hard to get a visa.

You can get a golden visa but you need to buy a property without mortgage for at least 500.000 euros.

There is talk of a freelancer Visa that’s going to be passed from the Spanish government but nothing been passed yet.

 

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[Andy Black]

And I got COVID. Maybe that was a part of the reason why I've been feeling so shitty the last few days.



Feel free to reach out via a private message and I'll answer any questions you have.



That's why I don't want to just set another goal and hope it'll make me happy (because it won't) as I agree with James that you can't live from goal to goal. Many posts in this thread suggest to have new goals and I don't think that's the right answer as I don't want to be dependent on having goals to feel okay.



Lol I don't remember any fine ladies.



Thanks for your comment. I appreciate it.



I considered something like that. I'll look more into it.

Hope you get better quick.

The physical and mental affect each other, both ways.

Profit attracts capital.

social status also attracts capital, and can probably be thought of as equivalent to material profit (and the two are convertible to some extent anyway).

The work itself is the reward, if it's moving you in the direction you want to move in

Just had to highlight these. Thanks @Rabby.

 

[Rabby]

What do you mean by social status? Like good PR for corporations? Or people sharing online that they "planted" 50 trees because they donated to a non-profit?

Not exactly. PR wins and sharing online are the more transactional/momentary part of a spectrum that describes what socially motivated individuals are really looking for. Think "instant gratification." Like candy or snacks, likes and subscribes might hit a craving, but they do not necessarily represent the underlying nutritional need.

Motivation is a range of things, and not everyone is the same. Some people only crave the microsecond of praise and attention that 100 people can give them through social media, true enough. They're addicted to short term, immediate validation. But the deeper social motivations often center on finding people who are more like ourselves, with similar cares and objectives, and earning their respect and attention over time. Being acknowledged and respected by these people, even if it's only one person, or 5 people in a group, is more powerful than being "liked" online by 1mm people, or having them buy your product. At least, to someone it's more powerful. This is where people's individual motivations can differ significantly.

So imagine someone who has money to invest, but they want to see themselves as helping the world. They want other people who are very successful, and who they respect for taking on great works, to acknowledge their efforts and see them the same way. They want to do things that transcend income brackets and are equally respected by people who struggle financially, and millionaires or billionaires. And of course, they want to do better than tossing their money into a pit and lighting it on fire... they want it to have an impact, but they also want to see a path for their investment to return to them so they can continue making an impact. (Recall what an urge to continue is.)

Social motivations are powerful. You'll often see them increase in people who have gained as much wealth as they're interested in, people who are older and see the horizon, and financially successful people who feel they aren't close enough to their communities or other people with interests like their own.

 

[MTF]

No unfortunately not.

Still working on growing my saas. The children are at the wrong ages to move (12 and 14) and now England is no longer in the EU means it’s very hard to get a visa.

You can get a golden visa but you need to buy a property without mortgage for at least 500.000 euros.

There is talk of a freelancer Visa that’s going to be passed from the Spanish government but nothing been passed yet.

Have you considered potentially easier for the British (and much warmer) options in the Caribbean? Like BVI, Cayman Islands, or Turks and Caicos? Though I understand it may not provide the lifestyle that you'd like as these are all tiny islands.

 

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[Andy Black]

Not exactly. PR wins and sharing online are the more transactional/momentary part of a spectrum that describes what socially motivated individuals are really looking for. Think "instant gratification." Like candy or snacks, likes and subscribes might hit a craving, but they do not necessarily represent the underlying nutritional need.

Motivation is a range of things, and not everyone is the same. Some people only crave the microsecond of praise and attention that 100 people can give them through social media, true enough. They're addicted to short term, immediate validation. But the deeper social motivations often center on finding people who are more like ourselves, with similar cares and objectives, and earning their respect and attention over time. Being acknowledged and respected by these people, even if it's only one person, or 5 people in a group, is more powerful than being "liked" online by 1mm people, or having them buy your product. At least, to someone it's more powerful. This is where people's individual motivations can differ significantly.

So imagine someone who has money to invest, but they want to see themselves as helping the world. They want other people who are very successful, and who they respect for taking on great works, to acknowledge their efforts and see them the same way. They want to do things that transcend income brackets and are equally respected by people who struggle financially, and millionaires or billionaires. And of course, they want to do better than tossing their money into a pit and lighting it on fire... they want it to have an impact, but they also want to see a path for their investment to return to them so they can continue making an impact. (Recall what an urge to continue is.)

Social motivations are powerful. You'll often see them increase in people who have gained as much wealth as they're interested in, people who are older and see the horizon, and financially successful people who feel they aren't close enough to their communities or other people with interests like their own.

And as @Kak is fond of saying, our personal brand and social status is non-taxable.

 

[Paul David]

Have you considered potentially easier for the British (and much warmer) options in the Caribbean? Like BVI, Cayman Islands, or Turks and Caicos? Though I understand it may not provide the lifestyle that you'd like as these are all tiny islands.

No. I'd be happy to go there for holidays but not to live.

Reason being that Spain is within the same timezone as UK (1 hour ahead usually) so things like Football can be watched at the same without having to wake up in the middle of night.

It's a 2 hour flight from UK (flights can be cheap) so it's easy for friends and family to come over or us to go back whenever we want.

My Father in law lives in New Zealand and I find the time difference really strange. It's usually his morning and our evening, or the other way around when we speak. It just seems too far removed from my existing life.

Plus Spain with it being large in size has lots of places to explore.

 

[James Klymus]

Do I wake up bursting out of bed with excitement? No. Do I think to my self from time to time "damn, I get to do some pretty cool stuff in my life"? Yes I do. Also it depends on the day. If i'm doing something that I've never done, I'll be more excited than I will be with my routine life. I'm still excited about that though.

In my opinion, there are people that will hear the term "waking up excited every morning" and their mind will set an unreasonable expectation that every day should be a crazy adventure. Every day won't. Some days will, And some days will be routine, But both should excite you.

 

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[jasonharnum]

Do you take magnesium?

The quality of my sleep if I take it vs don't take it is pretty crazy. I discovered this by accident as I take magnesium for leg cramps.

I went down the magnesium rabbit hole recently and was blown away by the differences in quality and benefits..

8 Types of magnesium and their benefits

There are many types of magnesium that people can use as dietary supplements, on the skin, and for specific conditions, such as constipation. Learn more here.

www.medicalnewstoday.com

Think I made the best choice?

Jigsaw Health | It's Fun To Feel Good® | Premium Nutrition Supplements

Jigsaw Health uses only the highest quality ingredients to provide you with premium nutritional supplements. Magnesium, Potassium, B-Vitamins, and more to boost energy, stay hydrated, ease leg cramps, and help you sleep better. Our motto: It's FUN To Feel Good.®

www.jigsawhealth.com

 

[GPM]

I went down the magnesium rabbit hole recently and was blown away by the differences in quality and benefits..

8 Types of magnesium and their benefits

There are many types of magnesium that people can use as dietary supplements, on the skin, and for specific conditions, such as constipation. Learn more here.

www.medicalnewstoday.com

Think I made the best choice?

Jigsaw Health | It's Fun To Feel Good® | Premium Nutrition Supplements

Jigsaw Health uses only the highest quality ingredients to provide you with premium nutritional supplements. Magnesium, Potassium, B-Vitamins, and more to boost energy, stay hydrated, ease leg cramps, and help you sleep better. Our motto: It's FUN To Feel Good.®

www.jigsawhealth.com

Just take as many different forms and a$$ what works best for you I guess. The stuff ranges in prices from a few pennies a dose to nearly $1. It's pretty vast. I haven't figured any magic bullet out yet. I generally take like 3-5 different forms of it before bed.

 

[NeoDialectic]

I know how setting goals, achieving them, and not feeling any different made me feel in the past. I think I can extrapolate it into the future. For now all I can hope for is that somehow this feeling will go away for a while (and probably return again in the future).

Some of your replies set off a bunch of trip wires in my head, so I have a few questions. That will likely lead to more prodding once you answer them.

When you answer my questions, can you set aside metaphysical and strictly philosophical arguments of nihilism and leave them for another time. When I am asking you about how you feel about something, I am not asking whether that thing will matter in 1 million years, I am asking about the innate feeling you get from something that comes before your thought processes. Example: if you are a typical straight man and I ask if you find a particular woman physically attractive; I am not looking for your logical assessment of her mating value. I am asking for the immediate feeling that pops up.

That's what I'm looking for here.

Do you feel like there is some kind of overarching goal or point?
Do you feel like there are skills or things that can bring you closer to that?

This isn't meant as a gotchya, so I'll come out with my answer to try and build a bridge. I do feel like the point of life is some combination of fulfillment and happiness. Those words don't fully and accurately describe my thoughts, but it's a decent estimation. One of the pillars that are required to make that happen is competence. Not just competence for it's own sake, but competence in a facet I believe is valuable or in a facet that helps lead me to something I value.

What about you?

 

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[MTF]

Do you feel like there is some kind of overarching goal or point?

The overarching point is death. I sometimes feel like I'm watching a movie where with each minute (or in this case, day or week) I'm getting closer to the end.

I don't write it just to sound down, it's just reality of how I see life and yes, it's the first thing I feel when I read your question.

Do you feel like there are skills or things that can bring you closer to that?

I guess we all have skills or things that can bring us closer to death lol.

 

[NeoDialectic]

The overarching point is death. I sometimes feel like I'm watching a movie where with each minute (or in this case, day or week) I'm getting closer to the end.

I don't write it just to sound down, it's just reality of how I see life and yes, it's the first thing I feel when I read your question.



I guess we all have skills or things that can bring us closer to death lol.

Let me challenge you on that a little bit. You are saying you don't have values. More accurately you may even be literally saying the ultimate value is death. Luckily, I typically don't believe peoples words when it comes to wants/values/etc. I look at their actions. So here we go.

If I was to believe that you feel the point is death, that would lead you to laying in bed all day doing literally nothing. There are some small set of actions that are unconscious and are not a choice (breathing). But getting out of bed is a choice. You have necessarily asserted a value. If you didn't, you would have laid there still in inaction. It's why a computer that isn't given instruction does....literally nothing. You can recursively analize every move. But thats a waste of time. The point was to prove the principle.

So no wonder you are coming on here frustrated. You innately do have values. You do have drives. You prove that every day. But your brain has led you to believe otherwise. Your mind is so strongly suffocated by your ideology that you are allowing it to keep control even when reality disagrees.

You may no longer intellectually know what your values are. But your goal needs to be to find them. Simply just setting any goal and achieving it is like cocaine. You feel the fleeting high but you are left empty (which echos your experience). The goals have to have some higher purpose towards your values for them to leave you fulfilled.

Dont forget. Nothing in this post contradicts philosophical nihilism or necessitates you set aside some part of your rational brain. Nothing in this post claims that there is in actuality some higher purpose. Nothing in this post necessitates a boogie man in the sky. No more so than me saying that you want to eat when your hungry and eating is fulfills that urge in and of itself.....regardless of whether it "matters" to the universe if you ate or if you will care that you ate when you are dead. Finding what you find valuable is a different question than what is valuable to the universe or some broader sense.

Rephrased in a different way. If I was to ask if something was a good thing. The correct answer should be good for who? The universe? Humanity? to MTF specifically? You are obviously an intelligent person that has thought things through. This has led you to expand into thinking about the "the universe" or "humanity" point of view. But in an ironic twist, you forget to switch back. You seem to forget that whether we can prove that the chair in front of you is real or just part of a simulation is a moot point. You necessarily act is if it is real. This cognitive dissonance leads to frustration.

So if the goals you attained don't leave you with something more than a fleeting high, you are chasing the wrong goals. Unfortunately no one said it was going to be easy finding what makes you tick and no one guarantees you will find it on the first try. Or that you will find it, and then as you get older it changes and now you are in existential dread as the things that use to work now don't. But since you do get out of bed in the morning, and you are human...You do have values and you can work towards them with goals and find joy in progress. Experimenting means failures, just like in entrepreneurship. If someone comes into a new venture thinking it will fail because they've failed in the past and know it all... Of course they will fail. And you KNOW this. You would be sitting there criticizing them for doing that. So apply this same idea to this values/goals finding mission.

You will have to try a bunch of things till one sticks. Hopefully each failure brings you closer to finding what will actually make you spring out of bed in the morning.