Any books/videos that CHANGED your life? Especially on confidence

[socaldude]

Most of the Books out there on Confidence ABSOLUTELY SUCK SUCK SUCK SUCK!!! I have read a few and they all say the same garbage: Act as if! Change your body language! etc. STFU I say in my mind.

I can tell you that based on my OWN experience confidence is a MIND SET of MULTIPLE TRAITS.

NOT just 1 thing.

Here is what I think those traits are:

1. Self Importance- Having HIGH self esteem, Being able to walk into a bathroom mirror and say "i'm important!". Your OWN opinion of yourself is worth light years more than anybody else. put your back straight and walk like your a king.

2. Shameless- The ability to not be embarrassed about anything! If you accidently fart in public SO WHAT?! When I say shameless i'm talking about harmless stuff not bad stuff like stealing or anything immoral. If you slip and fall in front of a bunch of people, so what? EDIT: this will allow you to walk into a room with thousands of people watching you and be able to talk to all of them through a podium on a stage. Say to yourself "so what?'

3. Optimistic- The ability to tolerate uncertainty, to accept the fact that somethings cannot be accounted for.

4. Not self conscious- Speak your mind and think aloud. Cause those who mind don't matter and those who don't mind matter- Dr seuss.

5. Don't seek others approval- Face it no everyone is gonna like you or agree with you. its just not possible.

6. Be courageous- Don't be afraid of anything.

7. Being able to jump out of your comfort zone at any moment! - go talk to that girl at the gym no matter who is around or who is watching!

I hope this helps you in your intimate relationships or in Fastlane ventures. :seeya:

 

[Tarheelfan2009]

The Traveler's Gift by Andy Andrews

This book changed my life. Especially, in the areas of responsibility, accountability, and pursuing dreams. I actually read The Traveler's Gift on the plane ride to my honeymoon a year ago. It will be a book that I save, jot notes inside the pages, and pass down for my future son or daughter.

One of the greatest parts of the book reveals "the place that never was" (a large celestial warehouse that holds the lost dreams of humanity) and from there the main character is able to see the hundreds of thousands of dreams that were never executed or finished, including inventions, medical cures, etc.

To this day, when I contemplate giving up on an idea I am forced to realize the consequences of doing such.

 

[Get Right]

The Bible. This is where my confidence comes from.

 

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[Tlcalis]

These are some awesome recources

Do Less, Achieve More - Chin-Ning Chu
Thick Face, Black Heart - Chin-Ning Chu
The Fountainhead
Release Your Brakes - James Newman
Live for Success - John T Molloy
Who Own's The Ice House?
Everything by Dan Pena
Everything by Mycomeup (youtube channel)
Everything by Robert Greene

Dating and self-improvement
Goodlookingloser.com (and the forum)
Boytoystory.com

 

[The-J]

In order for a book to change my life, I'd have to read it multiple times.

The Millionaire Fastlane did that for me. Rich Dad did that for me. The Power of Now and A New Earth did that for me. Oddly enough, The Book of Pook and 60 did that for me (socaldude mentioned books about self-confidence, well, The Book of Pook and 60 are books on how to pick up girls. I never picked up any girls but the books themselves have some golden material on improving oneself).

In order for learning material of any kind to change your life, you have to 'get it'. It takes me multiple run-throughs to 'get it'. Remember when you were taking a hard class like physics and the teacher would explain something and you'd be confused as hell and then they'd use some sort of example and you'd be all like 'I GET IT' and you'd take another example in your head and run through it and you'd make the same connection in your head? You have to do that with learning materials, except that you also have to implement it in order to really 'get it'. Get it?

 

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[Likwid24]

Great post Socal!

I would recommend reading "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. It might be the single most enlightening book I have ever read. It opens your eyes to many things that you probably never thought of when dealing with people. Another great book by Dale Carnegie that will help with confidence is "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living". Combined, they are very powerful.

I'm also going to try out the Dale Carnegie course on public speaking. Many successful people have graduated from the course including: Warren Buffet, Mary Kay Ash, J.W. Marriott, Jr, Frank Purdue, Dave Thomas, Zig Ziglar, Chuck Norris, Emeril Legasse, Joe Dimaggio and many, many more. Way too many to list them all.

 

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[Mouse McCoy]

John Alexander's "How To Be An Alpha Male" helped my self-confidence a great deal. After reading that book I felt like I walked a foot above the ground and everything in my vision seemed brighter/more vibrant. It's amazing what a change in mental attitude and compound exercises (both he recommends) can do for your overall well-being and perception of the world.

A quick tip from that book:

If you lack confidence constantly say "I'm the shit" or "I'm the man" in your head until it becomes an automatic thought for you. Then you're set.

 

[Vic]

As far as confidence, The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand. The protagonist in the book remains confident in his ability despite everything they try to do to him. It also helped mold my work ethic.

 

[PatrickP]

hmmm Socal I am not sure about your list.

The following numbers do NOT apply to me at all 1,2,3,4,6 and 7.

More than one way to skin a cat I think. I never was able to use the positive thinking, looking forward to the end sort of mantra you read about. I am the ok just do something productive for the next hour then the next hour then the next hour kind of guy.

It is too overwhelming for me to look even days in the future. My wife gave me ONE and only ONE goal and that was to make $55 a day. THAT was what I concentrated on so we would have food on the table and a roof over our head.

Confidence, accomplish things and the other stuff the OP wrote about hunh? Not likely for me anyways.

 

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[PatrickP]

lol no not saying that at all.

Yes you did stress that is what does it for YOU. Didn't mean to come off that way.

Thanks!

 

[TK1]

Oh, and few years ago I read this book, it's a HILARIOUS read and seems to fit your search 1:1

a**hole: How I Got Rich & Happy by Not Giving a @!?* About You: How I Got Rich and Happy by Not Giving a @!?* About You: Amazon.de: Martin Kihn: Englische Bücher

 

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[Vagabond 007]

Beyond Positive Thinking by Dr. Robert Anthony and Pyscho Cybernetics by Dr. Maxwell Maltz. 2 books that had a HUGE impact on me. I can't recommend them enough.

Books that had a big impact, but I wouldn't file them under life changing...

Rich Dad Poor Dad - Sat down to read a few pages and ended up reading the entire book in one sitting
TMF - I was too far along for it to be life changing. But I definitely learned from it.

 

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[TopChef]

Besides TMF :

Sun Tzu's The Art of War

A true classic!

 

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[Vick]

48 Laws of Power

 

[mentalic]

The two books that were most hardcore to me were:
Dale Carnegie - How to Win Friends and Influence People (I think that this book is a must read for everyone...)
Felix Dennis - How to Get Rich (reality strikes in this book...instead of talking about how easy it is to get rich, it talks about how difficult it is, close to MJ beliefs I think)

Concerning self confidence, two things are very important that you probably have to look into:
How have you been grown up
Who are your friends

I have heard some audiobooks about Jim Rohn and Antony Robbins that have to do with self confidence. Especially Antony Robbins voice is really influencial. You can also check Tal Ben-Shahar books about happiness/positive psychology.

I used to have a little problem with self confidence (for no reason..) and it took me a lot of time and effort to overcome it. I would be happy to share my experiences with you by PM if you want.

 

[Deleted78083]

I think confidence is fluide and changes and evolves according to your lifestyle. It's been more than a month than my country is in quarantine, I haven't been able to talk to new people, go to new places or do anything that gets me out of my comfort zone (mainly social things). The result is stricking: low self-esteem, low self-confidence, low energy. I believe that if you want to increase your confidence, you should expose yourself to activities outside of your comfort zone, and gradually expand it.

 

[ChrisV]

I've noticed most successful entrepreneurs have this amazing, underlying confidence in themselves where they've already imagined themselves as going to accomplish success, as if it's inevitable.

I'm looking for something...preferably a book, and preferably non-fiction (but I'm open to all suggestions)...but basically looking for something that illustrates exactly what not giving a damn is like, or suppose to look like, and how to accomplish the things you want in life without worrying so much.

A book that basically shows you how to THINK confident...

You might be putting the cart before the horse. You can say 'successful peope are confident so if i become confident I'll become successsful'..

But that appears to not be correct.

They tried that in the 90's. They did studies that found that kids with self esteem were more successful. So the answer was obvious.. we'll giv children more self esteem and they'll become successful. It resulted in "everybody-gets-a-trophyism" and had zero effect on their success. I believe in some cases it was even harmful.

Either way it was a total disaster.

It's more likely that successful people become confident, so I personally don't feel like it's good to just focus on confidence.

Edit.. Oh.. i just realized this thread was like 8 years old. Jeez.

 

[Andy Black]

View: https://youtu.be/wBlJ5HbFpYQ

 

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[triodine]

The Alchemist by Paulo Coehlo.

This one really resonated with me and really helped me with some inner growth and helped changed my outlook on a lot of aspects of my life. While it's not necessarily about "confidence", it's an amazing story about a man's journey of self-discovery. I recommend it to everyone.

 

[Seth]

I've noticed most successful entrepreneurs have this amazing, underlying confidence in themselves where they've already imagined themselves as going to accomplish success, as if it's inevitable.

I'm looking for something...preferably a book, and preferably non-fiction (but I'm open to all suggestions)...but basically looking for something that illustrates exactly what not giving a damn is like, or suppose to look like, and how to accomplish the things you want in life without worrying so much.

A book that basically shows you how to THINK confident...

 

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[Rain]

The Millionaire Fastlane , Think and Grow Rich, Psycho-Cybernetics, to name a few.

 

[socaldude]

hmmm Socal I am not sure about your list.

HAHA thats OK! i'm not on a campaign to change other people.

I just thought I would share my take on what helped ME. I figured "hey if i can post something someone else reads and goes hey that really helped me" then i'm all good.

But if someone says socaldude your full of shit, then thats okay i don't seek others approval =). But if someone says hey number 1 helped me or hey number 3 really made me look at XYZ different then i did my job =)

 

[socaldude]

In order for learning material of any kind to change your life, you have to 'get it'.

I see that a lot with people who read TMF . I sit there and i'm like dude WTF your still doing or saying or believing XYZ EVEN after you read TMF ?

I agree you have to connect the dots yourself. These books can only bring you the concepts and principles but you have to be able to make sense of it in the real world.

 

[TK1]

[video=youtube_share;w4Pu_JuPILw]http://youtu.be/w4Pu_JuPILw[/video]

I hope the movie helps you out

 

[Lights]

This isn't cause by a book? Maybe, but I never needed a book on how to get whatever your looking for. Confidence is something I do have though. I love myself more than most people love themselves. Well for me to get to that point, I had to see myself as grandiose viewpoint, and really feel it.. I believe in myself I can get anything I want. I think of life as a temporary state anyways, so it really doesn't matter.


My life took me down many routes... and each road was tougher than the last one. There are situations I question the very fiber of my being, and a lot of people may disagree with my thoughts. Some will tell me I will go to hell, but hell doesn't scare me that much. Even my mother told me I am possess of a demon, but that's idiocy because she's afraid of what I am capable of. But you just have to love yourself, or else you have nothing.

 

[socaldude]

Oh, and few years ago I read this book, it's a HILARIOUS read and seems to fit your search 1:1

a**hole: How I Got Rich & Happy by Not Giving a @!?* About You: How I Got Rich and Happy by Not Giving a @!?* About You: Amazon.de: Martin Kihn: Englische Bücher

LOL Treating the market that way and your customers is a sure way to fail. But it does look like a funny book.

 

[JasonR]

Most of the Books out there on Confidence ABSOLUTELY SUCK SUCK SUCK SUCK!!! I have read a few and they all say the same garbage: Act as if! Change your body language! etc. STFU I say in my mind.

I can tell you that based on my OWN experience confidence is a MIND SET of MULTIPLE TRAITS.

NOT just 1 thing.

Here is what I think those traits are:

1. Self Importance- Having HIGH self esteem, Being able to walk into a bathroom mirror and say "i'm important!". Your OWN opinion of yourself is worth light years more than anybody else. put your back straight and walk like your a king.

2. Shameless- The ability to not be embarrassed about anything! If you accidently fart in public SO WHAT?! When I say shameless i'm talking about harmless stuff not bad stuff like stealing or anything immoral. If you slip and fall in front of a bunch of people, so what? EDIT: this will allow you to walk into a room with thousands of people watching you and be able to talk to all of them through a podium on a stage. Say to yourself "so what?'

3. Optimistic- The ability to tolerate uncertainty, to accept the fact that somethings cannot be accounted for.

4. Not self conscious- Speak your mind and think aloud. Cause those who mind don't matter and those who don't mind matter- Dr seuss.

5. Don't seek others approval- Face it no everyone is gonna like you or agree with you. its just not possible.

6. Be courageous- Don't be afraid of anything.

7. Being able to jump out of your comfort zone at any moment! - go talk to that girl at the gym no matter who is around or who is watching!

I hope this helps you in your intimate relationships or in Fastlane ventures. :seeya:

Solid advice!

 

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[Milkanic]

Oddly enough, The Book of Pook and 60 did that for me (socaldude mentioned books about self-confidence, well, The Book of Pook and 60 are books on how to pick up girls. I never picked up any girls but the books themselves have some golden material on improving oneself).

I'd have to agree here. I read some pickup stuff after ending a three year relationship and there is some gold buried in a lot of shit. Check out RSD Blueprint Decoded - it is expensive (check ebay or torrents if you want) but there are several hours of quality content.

Goals! by Brian Tracy and Awaken the Giant Within are quality audio books to get too. I prefer audio books for this type of stuff so you can "brainwash" yourself while you fall asleep.

 

[johnp]

yes I have something. I listen to this in the car, on my phone, and basically whenever my motivation/inspiration starts dropping. It worked well through a long hockey season, it helped me through some rough classes in college, and it is helping me when I start feeling negative and overwhelmed with my start-up. This is one of those speeches that sends chills up your spin. It's a little slow for the first 10 seconds but just give it a time.

And considering that I am from Philly this one I guess has a personal touch..

[video=youtube;GsD83l6pIT0]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GsD83l6pIT0[/video]

 

[Fermovian]

I did three things that seemed to help.

The counter intuitive one was to realize that I was just another person and if I failed, succeeded, or did nothing no one would care in the long run, and they were more preoccupied with their own lives than with me.

I also realized that I was not the most important person in the world, the universe was larger and more important than me by far, and that I was not so important that I had to succeed for the world to go on.

I also did hypnosis mp3's for confidence as well as other aspects of my personality.

 

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