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- May 27, 2015
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Have any of you meet or see someone that made you completely in awe and....made you started a very deep, at least a week long self-introspection?
I did.
It is amazing to see someone that was in my exact situation years before, using the same methods, with the same mindset to solve the same problem that happened to me, except everything this person does, how he/she does is much better than I do, and this person does it consistently regardless whether how much he or she has accomplished. It completely shattered the story that I kept on telling myself how successful I am today, and forced me to give myself a very hard look into who I really am today.
Today, I found out that I am actually not a very good risk taker, nor do I like to take risks. But the thing that kills me, is that I know when I do take good, calculated risks, it pays off big time in the end. I joined the military in one of my most desperate times in my life, rocked the navy boot camp, and got out the military with free tuition money and completely avoided the 2008 finical collapse that is still shadowing America today. During college, I moved myself a couple of times to take some internships, due to the long driving distance and LA traffic, I lost one of my wheels on the high way and I was lucky to not be seriously injured; I did not get a job after that internship, but that ends up to be a good thing, because I have had the experience to take on the great job that I have now. But this great job today also morphed into a comfortable existing, that made me do not want to take anymore risks. All my friends who started out with me have moved on to become senior managers, making six figures somewhere, but I am somehow here today feeling all comfortable, until I saw this above person I described.
I literally just written a 7 page self-reflection journal, a serious look into my strengths and weaknesses. This person reminds me of who I want to be, and who I want to spend my life with, and the promise I made to myself after I overcame being bullied in middle school with one of my old friend...
There is one thing I do know, is that by choosing comfort over freedom, I have chosen to be enslaved by something, or someone. Whether it is my boss, or my own desires. By chosen comfort, I disavowed my own true passions.
What kills me is that I know I have the capability to be able to take smart risks and deliver good results...after all, I have done it several times already. For someone that doesn't like to take frequent risks like me, this is what kills me. I can do what most amazing people that I know do, doing exactly the same thing, and do it just as well, but I never, never in my life, for once, did it consistently through a long period of time. It is always doing it, then go back to whatever comfort that I can find, then stop taking any risk, and just pick someone at the bottom end of the ladder, and compare myself to that guy, and thinking, "Oh I have already done enough". But, once in a while, I get external shocks like this, and I really, really sure about this is the last time I want to experience a shock like this.
I want to become the person that I promised myself years ago, no more excuses. Really, I don't. Back then I didn't have time and capital, but now thanks to this great job that I have, I have both now, and experience, there really isn't any more excuses that I can use to not work on myself anymore.
And this starts by finding out how can I consistently becoming and maintaining that better self who took some risks and delivered. I know, that without that self being there before, I might not even find this forum in the beginning, nor would I read any of MJ's books.
Has anyone had similar experience? I would love to hear about your personal experiences, and I welcome any suggestions. I am torn by myself, why am I simultaneously a guy who took some risks and won some, but a guy that doesn't like to take risks and don't take good risks? How is this possible?
I did.
It is amazing to see someone that was in my exact situation years before, using the same methods, with the same mindset to solve the same problem that happened to me, except everything this person does, how he/she does is much better than I do, and this person does it consistently regardless whether how much he or she has accomplished. It completely shattered the story that I kept on telling myself how successful I am today, and forced me to give myself a very hard look into who I really am today.
Today, I found out that I am actually not a very good risk taker, nor do I like to take risks. But the thing that kills me, is that I know when I do take good, calculated risks, it pays off big time in the end. I joined the military in one of my most desperate times in my life, rocked the navy boot camp, and got out the military with free tuition money and completely avoided the 2008 finical collapse that is still shadowing America today. During college, I moved myself a couple of times to take some internships, due to the long driving distance and LA traffic, I lost one of my wheels on the high way and I was lucky to not be seriously injured; I did not get a job after that internship, but that ends up to be a good thing, because I have had the experience to take on the great job that I have now. But this great job today also morphed into a comfortable existing, that made me do not want to take anymore risks. All my friends who started out with me have moved on to become senior managers, making six figures somewhere, but I am somehow here today feeling all comfortable, until I saw this above person I described.
I literally just written a 7 page self-reflection journal, a serious look into my strengths and weaknesses. This person reminds me of who I want to be, and who I want to spend my life with, and the promise I made to myself after I overcame being bullied in middle school with one of my old friend...
There is one thing I do know, is that by choosing comfort over freedom, I have chosen to be enslaved by something, or someone. Whether it is my boss, or my own desires. By chosen comfort, I disavowed my own true passions.
What kills me is that I know I have the capability to be able to take smart risks and deliver good results...after all, I have done it several times already. For someone that doesn't like to take frequent risks like me, this is what kills me. I can do what most amazing people that I know do, doing exactly the same thing, and do it just as well, but I never, never in my life, for once, did it consistently through a long period of time. It is always doing it, then go back to whatever comfort that I can find, then stop taking any risk, and just pick someone at the bottom end of the ladder, and compare myself to that guy, and thinking, "Oh I have already done enough". But, once in a while, I get external shocks like this, and I really, really sure about this is the last time I want to experience a shock like this.
I want to become the person that I promised myself years ago, no more excuses. Really, I don't. Back then I didn't have time and capital, but now thanks to this great job that I have, I have both now, and experience, there really isn't any more excuses that I can use to not work on myself anymore.
And this starts by finding out how can I consistently becoming and maintaining that better self who took some risks and delivered. I know, that without that self being there before, I might not even find this forum in the beginning, nor would I read any of MJ's books.
Has anyone had similar experience? I would love to hear about your personal experiences, and I welcome any suggestions. I am torn by myself, why am I simultaneously a guy who took some risks and won some, but a guy that doesn't like to take risks and don't take good risks? How is this possible?
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