Your Biggest Lesson from 2023...?

[Anna13]

My biggest lesson is that if you’re willing to work so hard that you feel like you’re losing your mind and going insane by how many hours you’ve put in… then you’ll get outsized results that you wouldn’t even dream were possible for you.

But… there is a downside, your mental health will definitely suffer, and you won’t feel human anymore.

That’s sort of what I’ve done this year. Over 425 tasks / projects completed (compared to just 25 abandoned tasks/projects). To give you an idea, one “task” for example was learning how to code and creating an AI app from scratch to support your team of writers and add differentiation that none of your competitors have. And doing that all in 2 weeks while still handling 4-5 sales calls per day and all the other tasks.

I’ve fallen sick the past 10 days or so, so I’ve slowed down a lot and finally had a chance to look back. I can’t even believe what I’ve managed to achieve this year. I wouldn’t have imagined this even in my wildest dreams 1 year ago. But the amount of work I’ve put in this year has just been insane — I think I probably worked as hard as the past 2-3 years combined into one. Literarily wake up, do some exercise and then glued to my chair from morning to evening except 1-hour spent watching a show in the evening with my partner. I even ate while working.

I haven’t had a chance to even really make sense of the money I’ve earned partly because my father has fallen ill battling with lung cancer so I’ve been helping him and partly because I just had no time to pause, and I’ve reinvested a lot into getting the best people on my team, improving our margins, etc.

(An interesting side-note, I’ve been so overwhelmed this year that I don’t even consider if I can do X task — I just start doing it. Like my mind has no time to consider if coding an app myself from scratch is a good idea vs spending money and trying to find a developer for it, so it just jumps into action)

Yes! Mental health is definitely a thing in being a fastlaner. But I hope it paid, so you can rest more now. I once thought, hey that‘s actually an opportunity to learn how to relax… cause rich people I‘ve met, they were so relaxed and totally focused. Maybe they went through the fastlaner stress and learned to relax?

 

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[Anna13]

I'd say the same lesson for me but different conclusions.

Because time is insanely valuable and passes super fast, make sure that you enjoy your life. Either way, time will pass quickly but in one scenario you feel like you've wasted your life on nothing while in another you'll be happy for all the memories (even if still wishing for time to go more slowly).

So make sure that you're in the right, positive environment for you and that every day you do things that excite you and make you happy.

As a side note, this also means that if you hate where you live, prioritize your needs over forcing yourself to live where you hate because of your family and friends.

That‘s why I‘m finding joy in parties on the weekend. Work hard calls for party hard: dance the stress away. No need for drinking much. Just dance and meet cool people! Thanks for reminding!

 

[Black_Dragon43]

Yes! Mental health is definitely a thing in being a fastlaner. But I hope it paid, so you can rest more now. I once thought, hey that‘s actually an opportunity to learn how to relax… cause rich people I‘ve met, they were so relaxed and totally focused. Maybe they went through the fastlaner stress and learned to relax?

I’ve started to learn resting more because I got sick. Before this, I used to work nonstop and I couldn’t stop my mind from thinking about work. I was like a zombie, always thinking obsessively about the next thing I need to do lol. I had started to research books to teach me how to relax lol — my mind was always on, always scheming, it gave me no rest. I was actually worried about not being able to stop anymore.

So yeah, I’m definitely interested to explore being more balanced in the future. My most recent help came from @perchboy ’s latest thread, about finding happiness in the journey.

 

[Anna13]

I’ve started to learn resting more because I got sick. Before this, I used to work nonstop and I couldn’t stop my mind from thinking about work. I was like a zombie, always thinking obsessively about the next thing I need to do lol. I had started to research books to teach me how to relax lol — my mind was always on, always scheming, it gave me no rest. I was actually worried about not being able to stop anymore.

So yeah, I’m definitely interested to explore being more balanced in the future. My most recent help came from @perchboy ’s latest thread, about finding happiness in the journey.

So good to read this answer, so I am not the only one dealing with stress and trying to learn how to relax, thank you!

 

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[Yeti]

My biggest lesson for 2023 is consistency wins.
Do the unsexy, 'stupid', foundational work, consistently.
One step at a time.
Step by step.

Being consistent can be hard, but it can be easy, and it can be hard again.

I learned it now. Better late than never..

 

[BlackMagician]

For me, it's COMPOUNDING.

For years, i took steps and worked on my plans. Plans and goals keep updated but eventually, this year, everything comes together and I can see the effect of compounding. The actions are compounding so much that i can't believe.

 

[Subsonic]

This year was a mixed bag for me.

That allowed me to learn a lot of things.

1. Nothing teaches you more than actually making money.

2. I learned that the main reason I wasn't getting ahead as much as others was a lack of discipline. The last few weeks I have been constantly doing things I don't feel like to improve my discipline.

3. Talking of discipline. There are three levels of it that I have encountered so far.
Level 1 is wanting to be disciplined and starting something like a cold shower.
Level 2 is to keep going when your brain says "experiment over, you have been disciplined, now reward yourself".
Level 3 is being disciplined when one doesn't want to be disciplined. So taking the cold shower on a random Wednesday after sleeping poorly.

4. Stick with things for longer.


5. This is the most important one I learned:
Setting too many tasks for tomorrow is instant gratification since you feel good in the moment, at the expense for your future self.
Also, not completing your daily list is really bad and makes your mind weak.

 

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[monnffffiiiiiii]

No doesnt mean no when you're selling. Talk a bit longer and you'll get a maybe, then a yes.

 

[ElectricFox]

My biggest lesson from 2023 is that I need to develop sales & marketing skills.
I'm editing a blog (in French) that makes IT accessible to non-IT people and I mainly rely on content creation and SEO to grow my traffic and email list.
But after 6 months, my traffic is of almost zero. I'm aware that it can take time but I need to see some results to confirm whether or not my blog is relevant or not.
I think it is relevant but I just need to find a way to reach my target audience and be effective at storytelling.
For that, I recommend Seth Godin's book "All Marketers Are Liars", which I'm currently reading and I find very insightful.
For the sales part, as I'm an introvert, I need to develop my communication skills and I will join a Toastmaster in my town for that.

 

[MartinG]

Through my own experiences, I've come to understand the profound impact that excessive internet use can have on personal well-being. Falling into the trap of endless possibilities online, I found myself navigating countless rabbit holes, questioning who I should be and where I should be, even when those locations were far from my reality. The constant allure of something else to do left me in a constant state of unwarranted self-comparison.

I noticed that the more time I spent online pursuing my goals, the more I deluded myself and distanced from the real world and its people. It became clear that this virtual immersion was affecting my basic life skills—socializing, holding meaningful conversations, and fully engaging in the tangible world. Realizing the detrimental impact, I've learned to keep this tendency in check.

Going forward, for me its about limiting its use to doing valuable tasks, and trying to consciously avoiding the pitfalls of endless scrolling on social media or getting lost in unproductive online pursuits. It's difficult when you spend a large portion of your life on a computer to use it for only its potential....

 

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[Ezovyon]

The lesson i learned is to always be flexible in adapting to change and not being afraid when it comes your way

 

[Canadoz]

Some of my learnings from 2023

1) Formality kills sales. All our lives we've been conditioned to think that in business you must be "professional". But sometimes you can be so "professional" at the expense of rapport. And when there is no rapport there is no sale. Next time you're in with a meeting with a client, those little conversational sidetracks at the beginning of the call or the end will make or break you. Chill out. Never be afraid to talk about something other than business during a sales call.

2) Always Act Very Busy Even if You're Not - Nobody goes to the empty restaurant or bar. Everyone heads to where other people are going. Humans are sheep in this respect. If a customer suspects that he's the only one buying your product - this does not inspire confidence. To remedy this - always project an image of "busyness".

3) Know how to question prospects - Never ever assume you know what they mean. "We need a car that's economical" sounds like a common sense statement. It's not. Ask them "What do you mean by an economical car?" Followed by "Why do want a car like that?" Not only will you discover that their interpretation of "economical" might be different to yours. You'll also discover the underlying reason "why" they want an economical car. Now you're in a much better position to actually sell to them.

4) Never ever give a quote over the phone - Customers think you're just making it up. Turn your quotation giving into a mini ritual and always do via email.

5) Increase the acceptance of your quotations exponentially by giving a price break-down. Ever get a crazy quotation from a supplier like an auto repair shop. Then you see the break down and it makes more sense. Do the same with your own customers - give a detailed quotation breakdown and see the acceptance rate multiply.

6) Warmth and Competence - When selling, you must project warmth and competence. If you project warmth without competence - you will fail. If you project no warmth and and no competence - you will almost certainly fail. Ever wonder why almost everyone loved Bill Clinton? Well only Bill Clinton could spin a homespun humourous yarn growing up in small town Akansas and fluently talk about GDP all in the same speech. That was was warmth and competence. Be more like Bill and people will buy more from you.

7) The Power of Humour - I think humour is the most powerful thing. Because not only does it project warmth, it also projects competence. Now you might be thinking, "how does a witty accountant project competence?". Well, because most people assume that witty people are also very competent people. So, it's like humour becomes like a two-edged sword.

8) Welcome to the Isolation Zone - Finally, as a solopreneur, you have to have meetings with yourself away from the hub bub of normal activity. Did you meet your goals? How well are your business goals progressing? Do you need to tweak your business goals? Where I live, there are around 10 hotels within a 20 minute drive away, I will always take an hour or two out of my schedule every 7-10 days for these "reality checks". Phone turned off. One writing pad. One Pilot pen. One coffee. One hotel lobby. This makes sure that you're business is not just bobbing up and down following currents like cork in the ocean but is following a dedicated course to achieving your business goals.

I hope you enjoyed my learnings from 2023!

 

[Andy Black]

No doesnt mean no when you're selling. Talk a bit longer and you'll get a maybe, then a yes.

I take a different tack.

No is No and Maybe is No.

"Sales is a screening process." (Blaise Brosnan)

I only want to work with people who bite my hand off down to my ankle.

 

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[The One]

You literally just got to do stuff.

I was too busy overthinking on how should I do this? How should I do that?

You Must read "The One Thing" - this will direct EXACTLY what you should do.

Thank you all who responded to soo many of my annoying questions. Especially you @Andy Black and @PureA

Also, I'm currently using @MJ DeMarco awesome website GoalSumo.com. I would have given an affiliate link but there ain't one yet. It actually is useful. It's like a flipping (can't say f**king anymore - tryna change) accountability partner and North Pole for your goals.

Happy new year?

 

[Black_Dragon43]

I take a different tack.

No is No and Maybe is No.

"Sales is a screening process." (Blaise Brosnan)

I only want to work with people who bite my hand off down to my ankle.

I tend to agree. Once someone has said no (presuming they understood the value proposition to start with), I've found it quite hard to turn around. Not that it doesn't happen, but those are usually the exceptions.

 

[Mattie]

The year is nearly up.. what did you learn?

---

My biggest lesson is that time is insanely valuable.

And building the use of your time into your "final" business system is a huge mistake, but very easy to make.

The goal has to be to use time to build a system that will work as much as possible on its own.

That is, your time should not be used directly - it should all go into building systems.

This is an obvious lesson from reading MJ's books... but this is the difference between knowing the path and walking the path I guess

1. The right people and working as a team make things happen quite faster and quite efficient.
2. What I have learned in here, shows my work ethic and mindset is quite different then the people they are used too.
3. Self-discipline, sacrifice, goes a long way. Not doing what everyone else is doing.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

You literally just got to do stuff.

I was too busy overthinking on how should I do this? How should I do that?

You Must read "The One Thing" - this will direct EXACTLY what you should do.

Thank you all who responded to soo many of my annoying questions. Especially you @Andy Black and @PureA

Also, I'm currently using @MJ DeMarco awesome website GoalSumo.com. I would have given an affiliate link but there ain't one yet. It actually is useful. It's like a flipping (can't say f**king anymore - tryna change) accountability partner and North Pole for your goals.

Happy new year?

Glad you are finding it helpful, the latest update was a game-changer!

 

[Intax]

The year is nearly up.. what did you learn?

---

My biggest lesson is that time is insanely valuable.

And building the use of your time into your "final" business system is a huge mistake, but very easy to make.

The goal has to be to use time to build a system that will work as much as possible on its own.

That is, your time should not be used directly - it should all go into building systems.

This is an obvious lesson from reading MJ's books... but this is the difference between knowing the path and walking the path I guess

My biggest lesson this year is that it’s always worth the time to understand what I feel right now. I began to do regular check-ins where I step back and understand what’s going on inside of me, how I feel right now, and let it all go. This leads to less time losing myself in distractions and better ideas that come from my intuition.

 

[Johnny boy]

Some personal changes and realizations.

Your friends, your partner, your family, all the people in your life..you’re supposed to be on the same team. Imagine playing a game of football or baseball, and the other team hated each other, competed against each other, talked bad about each other…you would laugh at them. A good team is united against the outsiders, not turned against each other. Apply that to your own team and remember you should always be thinking about it this way, where you’re genuinely trying to bring them closer, like you were a team captain.

The same goes for your relationship with your girl. It’s not cool to disrespect her. It’s like keying your own car and thinking it’s cool. It’s just stupid.

Be on the same team and work to bring people closer like a captain. Make sure the enemies are clear and unite the team against them with you.

The next thing I realized is that your religion is not what you think happens when you die. Your religion is what you prioritize in your life. If you make the focus of your life something secular or something pointless, and that’s what will be waiting for you (spoiler alert: there’s no heaven for ‘Seahawks fans’ or ‘Entrepreneurs’ if that’s the primary focus of your life)

I had to ask myself point blank, ‘what is my religion then?’ And seeing that I was spending all my focus, energy, thoughts and time on entrepreneurship and it was my identity, I had to admit that my religion had previously been entrepreneurship.

Making something your religion is selling yourself to it. What are you getting in return for your deal? I sell my soul and sacrifice to ‘business’ and all I get is money? F*ck that. Make sure when you offer up your soul you get a fantastic deal, and the temporary pleasures of this short life are not a good trade.

I will always be doing entrepreneurship because it’s natural for me, but it is not my religion, my true identity, my main focus, my all consuming goal, etc. It’s just something I do.

I am at peace, thankful and patient. Everything is happening as fast as it should be. It’s not my job to worry. I’m doing things because they should be done and it’s part of my life, but nothing to do with fulfilling an identity or not being enough.

With that said, I’ve stopped expecting to be happy all the time. I’m grateful to be alive. When I have to take my medicine, or things go wrong, or life kicks me in the teeth, I’m still alive and things are amazing. I’m a man, not a child. A man is built to work. I am not special. Grab a shovel, bust your a$$, and stop bitching. Life is too good and you’ve been too lucky to complain about anything anyways.

Life makes a lot more sense to me this year. Lots of clarity. Didn’t get it straightened out until recently though.

 

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[Thaddeus]

The year is nearly up.. what did you learn?

---

My biggest lesson is that time is insanely valuable.

And building the use of your time into your "final" business system is a huge mistake, but very easy to make.

The goal has to be to use time to build a system that will work as much as possible on its own.

That is, your time should not be used directly - it should all go into building systems.

This is an obvious lesson from reading MJ's books... but this is the difference between knowing the path and walking the path I guess

The most important thing I learned this year is to just TAKE ACTION. That is the gateway to your success, skip all the mental masturbation revolving around the task and just do the most important, mental challenging task first. For example if you're starting an agency as I am, just send out your first cold email AND build from that, learn on the way.

 

[Kunda]

The year is nearly up.. what did you learn?

---

My biggest lesson is that time is insanely valuable.

And building the use of your time into your "final" business system is a huge mistake, but very easy to make.

The goal has to be to use time to build a system that will work as much as possible on its own.

That is, your time should not be used directly - it should all go into building systems.

This is an obvious lesson from reading MJ's books... but this is the difference between knowing the path and walking the path I guess

'The days are long, but the years are few' Gretchen Rubin

 

[Black_Dragon43]

A good team is united against the outsiders, not turned against each other.

Take this too far though, and you’re left with no one. Governing men is a give and take game, sometimes you have to live even with snakes in your midst.

Read the lives of any ruler or leader of men. You cannot always dispose of those who aren’t of one spirit with you, without jeopardizing what you’ve built.

Why do you think Marcus Aurelius complained about having to put up with people who were rude, impolite, uncaring and so on? He was emperor, why didn’t he just order them killed? Because doing so would’ve been a greater danger to his empire than putting up with them. He would’ve ended like Nero, killed by his own people.

 

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[Johnny boy]

Take this too far though, and you’re left with no one. Governing men is a give and take game, sometimes you have to live even with snakes in your midst.

Read the lives of any ruler or leader of men. You cannot always dispose of those who aren’t of one spirit with you, without jeopardizing what you’ve built.

Why do you think Marcus Aurelius complained about having to put up with people who were rude, impolite, uncaring and so on? He was emperor, why didn’t he just order them killed? Because doing so would’ve been a greater danger to his empire than putting up with them. He would’ve ended like Nero, killed by his own people.

I’m not talking about Marcus Aurelius I’m talking about being close with the people in your life and all being on the same team and thinking about it consciously. Instead of what I was doing which was breaking rapport like 90% of the time with the people really close to me.

 

[The Racing Driver]

My biggest lesson from 2023 is Don't ASSUME Anything!

Had I not assumed so many seemingly irrelevant things this year, and spent a few minutes spent Googling a doubt, or speaking with someone who could answer my question, I would've saved myself a lot of stress and frustration, and be further ahead in my current projects.

Starting now, I resolve to act more like scientist and adopt a learning mindset.

 

[AceVentures]

Being a dad has made me happier than anything I'd ever tried before.

It's crazy, and I never thought it would happen like this. But after one year of being a father, it has become so much easier for me to just be myself. I've stopped caring about so many things that I used to waste my time worrying about, and I've got access to infinite love every day.

I spent years studying books, courses and podcasts on discipline, motivation, and mindset. That stuff all feels like a gimmick now compared to the feeling of having a family.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

That much of what defines you during your adult years was defined in your childhood years, set by your parents inexplicably, or inadvertently.

For parents, be careful of the example you set for your kids as you tackle life, as much of how they live their journey is likely a reflection of dealing with their perceptions of your parenting. Something you might say or do, an incident that takes 10 seconds to execute, a situation a parent might not even remember, might be remembered by your kid 40 years later. In fact, their entire life might be defined by it.

 

[JUAREZ]

That making scenarios in your mind about the problems in the "future" only give you stress and are killing your action. I lost so much time thinking about what I will do in the future with problems that may appear that my present was gone.

It was like opening a loop in my mind with a question on a problem that may appear and I could not concentrate at what was straight in my face until I came with a solution. Doing this made me loose conversations and good time with my family because I lost the ability to focus. And I was constantly feeling so much stress and was always in a hurry. And the results of my actions were pretty bad.

So now I am educating myself to only focus on the next step and be fully present until I finish. Then go for the next one.