I am inspired to write this post by a talk I just had with @Andy Black.
Let's go back to the future a bit. Back in 2015 I was a bubbly sales guy, working for a global recruitment agency dealing with clients and candidates in Russian, French, Spanish and Irish markets. I was talking 5 languages fluently, was fit, and vibrated self confidence. Not for long...
In the beginning of 2016 I quit my recruitment job and jumped straight into entrepreneurship. I was so caught in Analysis-Paralysis State that I was literally writing few business plans a month without taking any concrete action.
Many things contributed, but it took me only few months to fall into a very deep depression state - it got so strong that I even contemplated a suicide. I gained a ton of weight, cut all contacts with an outside world and was spending my days at home, not talking to anyone and still writing silly business plans. Going out paying bills and buying some junk food were the only times I had a personal contact with an outside world.
It didn't take long for my fit body to turn into a meat mountain and my communication skills to deteriorate. The confident guy who spoke 5 languages couldn't now properly communicate in his own native language. As you may guess, the situation with foreign languages got even worse...
As I mentioned in my previous post, my depression is pretty much cured and I've lost a lot of body fat in just a few months, but my destroyed ego and fear of communication is still there. I am still somewhat shocked that 1.5 year ago I could hold a superb English, French, Spanish or Russian conversation at a professional level, but now I still struggle to communicate in English.
The fear got so severe that I was thinking all day today about the upcoming call with @Andy Black. I was so scared that I contemplated retreating by making up some story just to go back into my lonely comfort corner. Hands shaking, heart pounding I lifted my phone and picked up Andy's call - I was literally so paralyzed that I couldn't talk at all for like 15 minutes - I was so ashamed of myself that I didn't want to open my mouth...
In overall, was the call successful? Personally, yes! I've got a ton of value out of it and was amazed by the wisdom Andy provided. When we finished our 1.5 hour chat, I put down my ear piece and closed my eyes. I reflected back to how well I used to handle calls back in 2015 and how I messed up this call. I realized one thing...
If it took me roughly a year to lose my ability to communicate in foreign language, I can similarly claim it back within a year, or even faster if I put my heart into it. The call made me realize that although, on the surface, I messed it up and made a joke out of myself; I've also faced a demon that has been haunting me for an entire year - demon that kept telling me that I was a failure and will never be who I used to be - a confident guy with a desire to communicate and make friends.
EDIT BY ANDY:
Here's the call:
Alamantas gets me telling my story first, then I ask him about what he's up to.
Let's go back to the future a bit. Back in 2015 I was a bubbly sales guy, working for a global recruitment agency dealing with clients and candidates in Russian, French, Spanish and Irish markets. I was talking 5 languages fluently, was fit, and vibrated self confidence. Not for long...
In the beginning of 2016 I quit my recruitment job and jumped straight into entrepreneurship. I was so caught in Analysis-Paralysis State that I was literally writing few business plans a month without taking any concrete action.
Many things contributed, but it took me only few months to fall into a very deep depression state - it got so strong that I even contemplated a suicide. I gained a ton of weight, cut all contacts with an outside world and was spending my days at home, not talking to anyone and still writing silly business plans. Going out paying bills and buying some junk food were the only times I had a personal contact with an outside world.
It didn't take long for my fit body to turn into a meat mountain and my communication skills to deteriorate. The confident guy who spoke 5 languages couldn't now properly communicate in his own native language. As you may guess, the situation with foreign languages got even worse...
As I mentioned in my previous post, my depression is pretty much cured and I've lost a lot of body fat in just a few months, but my destroyed ego and fear of communication is still there. I am still somewhat shocked that 1.5 year ago I could hold a superb English, French, Spanish or Russian conversation at a professional level, but now I still struggle to communicate in English.
The fear got so severe that I was thinking all day today about the upcoming call with @Andy Black. I was so scared that I contemplated retreating by making up some story just to go back into my lonely comfort corner. Hands shaking, heart pounding I lifted my phone and picked up Andy's call - I was literally so paralyzed that I couldn't talk at all for like 15 minutes - I was so ashamed of myself that I didn't want to open my mouth...
In overall, was the call successful? Personally, yes! I've got a ton of value out of it and was amazed by the wisdom Andy provided. When we finished our 1.5 hour chat, I put down my ear piece and closed my eyes. I reflected back to how well I used to handle calls back in 2015 and how I messed up this call. I realized one thing...
If it took me roughly a year to lose my ability to communicate in foreign language, I can similarly claim it back within a year, or even faster if I put my heart into it. The call made me realize that although, on the surface, I messed it up and made a joke out of myself; I've also faced a demon that has been haunting me for an entire year - demon that kept telling me that I was a failure and will never be who I used to be - a confident guy with a desire to communicate and make friends.
EDIT BY ANDY:
Here's the call:
Alamantas gets me telling my story first, then I ask him about what he's up to.
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