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What do you lovely people do, When you're down and out?

MattR82

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Why can't you sell some of the investment properties that are keeping you tied to the slowlane job?
 
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MattR82

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Also... something else I do when I’m overwhelmed from helping people is to ... go help more people.

It sounds counter intuitive, but I recently listened to “Give and Take” and it explained why.

A giver can get burnt out if they don’t see the impact their giving has on others. Do some extra giving so they can see the effect it has, and a giver can get recharged.
I think I need to read this book based on some of what you have written about here.

Right now I would say I'm giving a lot and neglecting myself. And even though I'm getting them results I don't get to see or hear much about it whuch makes the work feel very unsatisfying.

I knew there was a problem with this kind of thinking, has been going through my mind a lot the last few weeks in particular and I just dumped a client because of it. It's my own fault for letting it happen though.
 

MattR82

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It is definitely an option worth considering Matt.
I only had one investment property but it was all set up from my slowlane life and did a nice job of keeping me stuck there for some time till I cracked it.

I would love to get back into it again but not at the price of being forced to go back to that old life.
 
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Brewmacker

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I think I need to read this book based on some of what you have written about here.

Right now I would say I'm giving a lot and neglecting myself. And even though I'm getting them results I don't get to see or hear much about it whuch makes the work feel very unsatisfying.

I knew there was a problem with this kind of thinking, has been going through my mind a lot the last few weeks in particular and I just dumped a client because of it. It's my own fault for letting it happen though.

It is a great book that will change your outlook in life. Definitely worth a read. 'No more Mr nice guy' is another good book to learn how to set boundaries and give without totally giving yourself completely. I have to warn you there is a little bit of social calibration to be expected here.
 

PapaGang

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Papagang,

This is pure gold! Thanks so much for taking the time to respond and sharing your experiences. It is exactly the advice I needed to hear.

Your life seems infinitely busier than mine, but I see similarities in how life is going right now and I should definitely pay attention to my body and treat myself with kindness.

You have given me a lot to ponder upon especially with regards to prioritization. Truth be told, I have no idea if my social experiment will work and therefore it is a pretty big risk to walk away from my job even though I know where I would rather be.

As far as crazy goes, completely and utterly bonkers my friend! Best way to be!

Glad it helped in some way. I have to remind myself to not be worried about skipping my project for a few days. Usually I come back with a fierceness that is surprising.

I like your idea of renegotiating your hours, most of the time a smart executive or manager will realize your value and honor that request.

Best of luck!
 

Fastlane Liam

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Well firstly good luck, don't see how a new social media could start in 2019 but okay put that aside you go for what you believe in seriously.

Maybe your job is too stressful and takes up too much time to start a business.

However it sounds like you're proud to be a middle manager doing all these projects, how wonderful

Can you take a job that starts at 9 and finishes at 5? You remind me of people at my work who have to take their laptop home, are on call, have emails on their phone and in general are major cucks to company. They work more than 40 hours but are on salary.

Okay lets say you can't do that, maybe because you don't want to lose status or it doesnt work out financially.

Why are you learning to code? Do you want to be a developer? Just pay someone to make this for you. Jump on upwork and get Sergey from Ukraine to make you a functional, semi looking good web app for $200

You can't possibly do it all
 

reedracer

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Well firstly good luck, don't see how a new social media could start in 2019 but okay put that aside you go for what you believe in seriously.

Maybe your job is too stressful and takes up too much time to start a business.

However it sounds like you're proud to be a middle manager doing all these projects, how wonderful

Can you take a job that starts at 9 and finishes at 5? You remind me of people at my work who have to take their laptop home, are on call, have emails on their phone and in general are major cucks to company. They work more than 40 hours but are on salary.

Okay lets say you can't do that, maybe because you don't want to lose status or it doesnt work out financially.

Why are you learning to code? Do you want to be a developer? Just pay someone to make this for you. Jump on upwork and get Sergey from Ukraine to make you a functional, semi looking good web app for $200

You can't possibly do it all
This! Use the knowledge you've gained learning to code plus your PM experience and hire out the completion of all those Google map pages staring you down! You ca then go back and polish them a bit and Bob's your uncle.
 

Brewmacker

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Well firstly good luck, don't see how a new social media could start in 2019 but okay put that aside you go for what you believe in seriously.

Maybe your job is too stressful and takes up too much time to start a business.

However it sounds like you're proud to be a middle manager doing all these projects, how wonderful

Can you take a job that starts at 9 and finishes at 5? You remind me of people at my work who have to take their laptop home, are on call, have emails on their phone and in general are major cucks to company. They work more than 40 hours but are on salary.

Okay lets say you can't do that, maybe because you don't want to lose status or it doesnt work out financially.

Why are you learning to code? Do you want to be a developer? Just pay someone to make this for you. Jump on upwork and get Sergey from Ukraine to make you a functional, semi looking good web app for $200

You can't possibly do it all

Hi Liam, Thanks for pitching in mate.

It is a social networking site. On the other hand, isn't a blog such as this forum is also a form of social networking? A place where like minded people come together and share their experiences? I am not trying to be the next face book haha so you can rest assured, I have no plans to take over the world just yet.

Yes my job takes a lot of free time and can be very stressful but i leave my job at my desk and never ever ever take it home. Also I am definitely not middle management haha, I do not have the patience to suffer fools, so cannot ever see that happening, subtle as a brick pops into mind. I am a lot more focused on the engineering side and I work to live, not the other way around.

I am learning to code because I need an appreciation of it before I begin outsourcing. That is why i challenged myself to only build the MVP and not the entire site. But I have to admit €200 for a test site does sound very tempting right now.

I outsource a lot of technical work in my job, fortunately with somebody else's money thus limiting personal risk. To begin outsourcing coding work with absolutely zero understanding will in the long term burn through my savings faster than I can imagine. This comes from experience in my own job. If I cannot write a detailed specification of what I want and need to a programmer, how can I expect Sergey to read my mind and deliver me exactly what I want with minimal iterations? I will always receive something he thinks I want that is in no way matching my expectations. Also how can I check his work, how do I scan through the code looking for weak points (eg SQL injection points) before being entrusted to care for people's private data.

I only have to expose myself to the process once and from that experience this knowledge can be carried on for the rest of my life as an asset. What seems like hard work now will be a gift in the long term when need to start employing people and recognizing strengths and limitations when attempting to scale the product.

You are right, I cannot do it all, but doing a little of everything gives me the assurance that the product I deliver will be quality.

I am happy to give up salary to free up time, I just need to prepare my negotiation structure with my boss.
 
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Brewmacker

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This! Use the knowledge you've gained learning to code plus your PM experience and hire out the completion of all those Google map pages staring you down! You ca then go back and polish them a bit and Bob's your uncle.

Yeah @Fastlane Liam hit the nail on the head with that one. I think I am getting to that point now or at least I feel 1000x more confident than I did 4 months ago to start outsourcing. It is possibly time to start constructing the relevant specifications and start outsourcing this work. This could add a better dynamic to the project.
 

Andy Black

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I have a full time developer. I don’t even know what language our stuff is coded in. I don’t care. I just want it to work how I specified it, and to work fast.
 

Andy Black

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Yeah @Fastlane Liam hit the nail on the head with that one. I think I am getting to that point now or at least I feel 1000x more confident than I did 4 months ago to start outsourcing. It is possibly time to start constructing the relevant specifications and start outsourcing this work. This could add a better dynamic to the project.
You’ve read that “Stop Building Stuff” thread right? One of the startups I worked for was “building a social network”. It failed because that was the wrong goal.

Who are you helping? What are you helping them with? If you put those first then a social network is just one way HOW you can help those people.

That was my main takeaway working for that startup. It was a €40m lesson I believe.
 
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Brewmacker

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When I was a teen I’d take my pulse every morning before getting out of bed. My pulse rate would be high a day or so before I noticed any cold symptoms. Your body is telling you something.

Yep crazily you were spot on Andy, no burn out! I have been on my back for four days with ze "Manflu". No seriously though, i have been absolutely wiped out and could not even code at the table. Finally sitting upright to write this post.

I want to thank everyone here for their support and advice. As usual I post something on this forum which I think is quite clear, and you guys see a million different angles that I hadn't even considered. It was just the flu guys! Calm down haha!

No but seriously, I took all your advice to heart and took it into the fever to really reflect on what you advised.

Listen to Andy?
I have been building Andy! I think maybe for two weeks already, so we caught it early haha. Building has put the blinkers on. Its amazing what your can find when the blinkers are off. Thanks for sharing the posts mate!

F*cking Competitor?
My London based sister found a competitor (surprise surprise), a F*cking massive competitor and I really really love them. They are doing what I am planning to do just not with the same USP, method or structure. So I have identified their strengths (replicate) and their weakness (improve upon). It is really scary to find a direct competitor, but i have really missed that in this whole process. Now i have a bench mark to improve upon.

UX Design?
As i cannot code due to flu, I started UX design on Adobe XD. What a godsend! I have been so bloody stupid. I will formulate this whole process sometime, but for any budding developers out there, start here! Map it out! You can share it with friends and family and get direct advice as how to improve (helps massively that my family members are made up of business owners, UX designers and work for google). Actually F*ck friends, the only good feed back was from family because they truly want almost need you to succeed.

Logo?
Why not? Im sick gosh darn it!
Sent it to friends for feed back, all good, amazing fantastic.
Sent it to my google brother in law and i quote:
  • Will: " Idea is great, execution is shocking"
  • Me: (missing middle finger MJ)
  • Will: "so I am assuming you did this yourself",
  • Me: "yes"
  • Will: "phew"
  • Will "this is why the idea guys need to pay the pros to make their ideas come to life"
I was of course preparing something for professional work, but god I love him for his raw honesty. Surround yourself with these people guys. :)
PS The logo is awesome, just looks like a 3 year old drew it.


Upwork, sure who does not have a spare €20 grand lying around?

Seriously FML this is where the shit gets real. I am looking at a serious investment here. No kidding. I posted a job description and to be honest it was very well received of course, India is my best friend. Apart from every tom dick and harry posting how awesome they are, a few actually took the time to read the application and respond. One even had a beautiful blonde eastern European girl send me a personalised video. I took this absolute piss out of the CEO for that one but quickly told him that regardless, they invested time and energy to go above and beyond and we can open discussions.

So i will pull once more on your guys experiences here with a question: I am developing a app, not a wordpress shop. Do you know a guy? So many say i have so muc experience yet wordpress wordpress wordpress. I am really growing to hate that format.
(@Jon L dont worry the request for quotation will arrive in your inbox before every one else matie.)

So I have set up a few choice interviews tomorrow and let the teams know that the budget is tight until the MVP takes off. Once proven I can begin to liquidate some assets to invest to develop the mobile apps. I aim to get the web based app built for next to nothing, and invest later in the mobile apps. Hopefully i can negotiate this.

Conclusion is?

I really appreciate your support lovely people! It is not at all what is asked for, nor what i expected and instead as usual you always you go above and beyond why i could ever hope for. I am sick as fudge, but at the same time feel like I am winning again :) I really appreciate your support and I hope this response validates your efforts.
 

Entre Eyes

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Gym, Nutrition, Hydration, Sleep. We can't win if we are dead.

Remember the real life stories of people who overcame adversity.

You seem like a hardworking determined individual wish you nothing but the best.
 

Brewmacker

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Gym, Nutrition, Hydration, Sleep. We can't win if we are dead.

Remember the real life stories of people who overcame adversity.

You seem like a hardworking determined individual wish you nothing but the best.

Thanks mate,

cant wait to be hanging on my bars again.
 
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Andy Black

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Good to hear it was nothing more serious than man-flu. I’d consider that a shot across the bows. When we’re overly stressed our immune system isn’t at full strength. In other words, view the man-flu as a symptom rather than a root-cause.

I’m curious. Can you get customers or clients to pay for the build?

Oh, and I’ve been in business a couple of decades without a logo.

Get well soon!
 

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Its been a long while since my last post here, mainly because I have been working my butt off day and night to get phase one of my product out before Christmas.

Today (and yesterday) I have been repeatedly hit in the face by the overwhelming task ahead and I cannot get around it.
I am an elephant eater, it is my 9-5 job. But F*ck me the world wide web is incredibly big, and the more I learn, the bigger it seems to get. Still, if I had to go back four months and answer my own question, "do you really want to learn to code?" my answer would still be definitely, Yes. Yes Yes F*cking Yes! At the same time I am lost in the complexity.

I have never told you guys what I am doing before, but I am creating a online social network. A platform where people can connect in such a way that it hopefully addresses issues such as burn out , depression, anxiety which are all increasing issues in modern western life. My USP i will keep to myself for now, but the framework of the Web App is built upon 9 months of detailed targeted study and a lifetime of quietly witnessing social dynamics. I always was, and still am the quiet one in a group of people yet I always feel the need to be around people, in someway I am an introverted extrovert.

In my 9-5 i am an engineering design manager. I manage complex product designs for chemical processing plants from concept to delivery. It is fun, but right now I am managing 8 separate projects and recently (last week) I have additionally been pulled in by higher management to rescue a €20 mil project and get it commissioned and online by Christmas. It is a make or break career decision because I am jumping on to a nearly sunken ship and in the end if it fails, people will need someone to blame.

My priority is my own business, but with everything going on I am burning out, and fast. I am at work now and I just cant wait to go home and go to sleep. Every aspect of my life is feels like its stalling and I am so F*cking tired.

So my question is, does anyone else suffer from this and what are your methods to get back on track. At this moment I can see the following options:
  • Take a break from my own project - Take a week or two off (really do not want to do this)
  • Accept that it is just a phase and work though it - less efficient working (risk burning out completely)
So, your inner self is telling you that you need to pause and look at what you have been doing with your life and your time. Do you need a course correction? Are you heading in the right direction? Are you spinning your wheels? Only you can tell yourself what you need to do from here. There are no easy paths to find your answer. But, the answer is probably elegantly simple.
 

Brewmacker

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Good to hear it was nothing more serious than man-flu. I’d consider that a shot across the bows. When we’re overly stressed our immune system isn’t at full strength. In other words, view the man-flu as a symptom rather than a root-cause.

I’m curious. Can you get customers or clients to pay for the build?

Oh, and I’ve been in business a couple of decades without a logo.

Get well soon!

haha, leave the logo out of this Andy. I was sick :hilarious: but I hear you.

It surprises me that I got sick at all, i eat healthy, intermittent fast, exercise regularly, sleep 7-8 hours, limit alcohol to 1-2 days a week and I never work harder than my own capabilities.

Whilst on my back I needed to take the time to reflect on how. the conclusion is:

I have been burning the candle at both ends for 6 months straight without stopping and therefore need to discipline my self better to take healthier breaks and allow my mind and body to rest. I.e. not counting a piss up with the boys in Dublin a 'healthy' break. Really leave the work behind me and take a few days in nature or just away from anything work related. I will consider that time as an investment in the future.

I am not sure how get money from customers yet at this stage. Mainly because the product is free for customers. I need to take a different angle maybe, and start seeking out funding from institutes that will benefit from the product by my clients helping their clients. Actually thats not a half bad idea!
 
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Andy Black

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haha, leave the logo out of this Andy. I was sick :hilarious: but I hear you.

It surprises me that I got sick at all, i eat healthy, intermittent fast, exercise regularly, sleep 7-8 hours, limit alcohol to 1-2 days a week and I never work harder than my own capabilities.

Whilst on my back I needed to take the time to reflect on how. the conclusion is:

I have been burning the candle at both ends for 6 months straight without stopping and therefore need to discipline my self better to take healthier breaks and allow my mind and body to rest. I.e. not counting a piss up with the boys in Dublin a 'healthy' break. Really leave the work behind me and take a few days in nature or just away from anything work related. I will consider that time as an investment in the future.

I am not sure how get money from customers yet at this stage. Mainly because the product is free for customers. I need to take a different angle maybe, and start seeking out funding from institutes that will benefit from the product by my clients helping their clients. Actually thats not a half bad idea!
Hold on. Dublin? Are you in Ireland?

Think about how you’ll make money from your product. If you make money you’ll be able to help more people.
 

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Yep crazily you were spot on Andy, no burn out! I have been on my back for four days with ze "Manflu". No seriously though, i have been absolutely wiped out and could not even code at the table. Finally sitting upright to write this post.

I want to thank everyone here for their support and advice. As usual I post something on this forum which I think is quite clear, and you guys see a million different angles that I hadn't even considered. It was just the flu guys! Calm down haha!

No but seriously, I took all your advice to heart and took it into the fever to really reflect on what you advised.

Listen to Andy?
I have been building Andy! I think maybe for two weeks already, so we caught it early haha. Building has put the blinkers on. Its amazing what your can find when the blinkers are off. Thanks for sharing the posts mate!

F*cking Competitor?
My London based sister found a competitor (surprise surprise), a F*cking massive competitor and I really really love them. They are doing what I am planning to do just not with the same USP, method or structure. So I have identified their strengths (replicate) and their weakness (improve upon). It is really scary to find a direct competitor, but i have really missed that in this whole process. Now i have a bench mark to improve upon.

UX Design?
As i cannot code due to flu, I started UX design on Adobe XD. What a godsend! I have been so bloody stupid. I will formulate this whole process sometime, but for any budding developers out there, start here! Map it out! You can share it with friends and family and get direct advice as how to improve (helps massively that my family members are made up of business owners, UX designers and work for google). Actually F*ck friends, the only good feed back was from family because they truly want almost need you to succeed.

Logo?
Why not? Im sick gosh darn it!
Sent it to friends for feed back, all good, amazing fantastic.
Sent it to my google brother in law and i quote:
  • Will: " Idea is great, execution is shocking"
  • Me: (missing middle finger MJ)
  • Will: "so I am assuming you did this yourself",
  • Me: "yes"
  • Will: "phew"
  • Will "this is why the idea guys need to pay the pros to make their ideas come to life"
I was of course preparing something for professional work, but god I love him for his raw honesty. Surround yourself with these people guys. :)
PS The logo is awesome, just looks like a 3 year old drew it.


Upwork, sure who does not have a spare €20 grand lying around?

Seriously FML this is where the shit gets real. I am looking at a serious investment here. No kidding. I posted a job description and to be honest it was very well received of course, India is my best friend. Apart from every tom dick and harry posting how awesome they are, a few actually took the time to read the application and respond. One even had a beautiful blonde eastern European girl send me a personalised video. I took this absolute piss out of the CEO for that one but quickly told him that regardless, they invested time and energy to go above and beyond and we can open discussions.

So i will pull once more on your guys experiences here with a question: I am developing a app, not a wordpress shop. Do you know a guy? So many say i have so muc experience yet wordpress wordpress wordpress. I am really growing to hate that format.
(@Jon L dont worry the request for quotation will arrive in your inbox before every one else matie.)

So I have set up a few choice interviews tomorrow and let the teams know that the budget is tight until the MVP takes off. Once proven I can begin to liquidate some assets to invest to develop the mobile apps. I aim to get the web based app built for next to nothing, and invest later in the mobile apps. Hopefully i can negotiate this.

Conclusion is?

I really appreciate your support lovely people! It is not at all what is asked for, nor what i expected and instead as usual you always you go above and beyond why i could ever hope for. I am sick as fudge, but at the same time feel like I am winning again :) I really appreciate your support and I hope this response validates your efforts.
If you're on upwork, my quote will be probably 4-10x their price.

I'd recommend you also check out TopTal. Their developers are vetted, and take pretty serious tests to get listed. They will be more expensive than Upwork, but, in my never to be humble opinion, its worth it. On Upwork, its possible to find good people. Its much more probable that you'll find absolute crap that will waste both your money and your time. For a non developer, its very difficult to tell the difference. I used to use a guy on TopTal who was an amazing developer. I've hired a number of people from Upwork, and with only one exception, had a miserable experience. One guy, with a 4.9/5 rating across years of experience on upwork wrote such bad code I fired him as soon as he sent in his first draft.
 

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If you're on upwork, my quote will be probably 4-10x their price.

I'd recommend you also check out TopTal. Their developers are vetted, and take pretty serious tests to get listed. They will be more expensive than Upwork, but, in my never to be humble opinion, its worth it. On Upwork, its possible to find good people. Its much more probable that you'll find absolute crap that will waste both your money and your time. For a non developer, its very difficult to tell the difference. I used to use a guy on TopTal who was an amazing developer. I've hired a number of people from Upwork, and with only one exception, had a miserable experience. One guy, with a 4.9/5 rating across years of experience on upwork wrote such bad code I fired him as soon as he sent in his first draft.

Oh Jon, your sending me back to building mode hahaha! I thought I was done with PHP forever!

Thanks for the advice amigo and for the fair warning. It is strange that 90% of the people say dont bother learning to code, just hire someone from fiverr or upwork. Yet the one guy who does this for a living advises that it is a high risk path. I can understand both point of views, but due to the complexity of what I need I am not sure a wordpress site will hack it, definitely not in the long run.

I am kinda left scratching my head with this one Jon. Regardless I am going to finish the wireframe design and the specifications and release them for tender. This process will undoubtedly generate a lot of knowledge building and in the end I will have to make the decision how to progress with the MVP be it a wordpress site that will set up for future scalability or a homebrewed version haha.

Thanks again!
 
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Hold on. Dublin? Are you in Ireland?

Think about how you’ll make money from your product. If you make money you’ll be able to help more people.

No I am Irish and from the north, but live in the Netherlands. Pop home 5-6 times a year to maintain family and friend relationships, or the odd stag party in Dublin.

Agreed, I think targeted advertising, or local advertising spaces will be the way to go here. Just wanted to keep the site pure for a wee while before spamming my customers. There should be a way to do this in subtle and profitable way though. But to accelerate things maybe this will be important.
 

Jon L

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Oh Jon, your sending me back to building mode hahaha! I thought I was done with PHP forever!

Thanks for the advice amigo and for the fair warning. It is strange that 90% of the people say dont bother learning to code, just hire someone from fiverr or upwork. Yet the one guy who does this for a living advises that it is a high risk path. I can understand both point of views, but due to the complexity of what I need I am not sure a wordpress site will hack it, definitely not in the long run.

I am kinda left scratching my head with this one Jon. Regardless I am going to finish the wireframe design and the specifications and release them for tender. This process will undoubtedly generate a lot of knowledge building and in the end I will have to make the decision how to progress with the MVP be it a wordpress site that will set up for future scalability or a homebrewed version haha.

Thanks again!
"Complex" and "Upwork" usually don't belong together. Like I said, there are plenty of people on Upwork that are great. Finding them is the issue. Edit: In my experience, you can't go based on feedback scores either. If your project is decently complex, and someone else's isnt, they'll give high praise, and leave you scratching your head as to why your project sucks so bad.

Seriously, check out TopTal. Get a quote from a couple people there. You'll thank me later.
 
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Brewmacker

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"Complex" and "Upwork" usually don't belong together. Like I said, there are plenty of people on Upwork that are great. Finding them is the issue.

Seriously, check out TopTal. Get a quote from a couple people there. You'll thank me later.

I will Jon, thanks
 
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AceVentures

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Brewmacker, first, I'd like to congratulate you on taking on so much responsibility successfully. It certainly is no easy task, and I can only imagine all of your other commitments outside of work and this business.

When I reach/approach burn-out, something I've started to do, which I learned from Tim Ferris, is called "Fear Setting". Essentially, I'll look at my worst case outcomes, and get myself to be OK with them. It's something that has almost entirely wiped my anxiety and allowed me to gain a new appreciation for life. I'm just generally happy, all the time.

A large reason why I feel this way, is because my downside is capped. Once I identify my downside, and I'm okay with it's occurrence, then I am reminded that anything I choose to GIVE today, is a choice. Because hell, if It's killing me, I'll just give up and do Plan Z (worst case outcome).

Give it a try, and see if it eases some of your concerns, anxiety, and sleep problems. Just remember, worst case scenario, we can move to Thailand together and live on the beach, giving English lessons to keep your tummy full. Which, to me, is an AWESOME outcome! I'm being overly simplistic here, but that's the point.

28216
 

Brewmacker

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Brewmacker, first, I'd like to congratulate you on taking on so much responsibility successfully. It certainly is no easy task, and I can only imagine all of your other commitments outside of work and this business.

When I reach/approach burn-out, something I've started to do, which I learned from Tim Ferris, is called "Fear Setting". Essentially, I'll look at my worst case outcomes, and get myself to be OK with them. It's something that has almost entirely wiped my anxiety and allowed me to gain a new appreciation for life. I'm just generally happy, all the time.

A large reason why I feel this way, is because my downside is capped. Once I identify my downside, and I'm okay with it's occurrence, then I am reminded that anything I choose to GIVE today, is a choice. Because hell, if It's killing me, I'll just give up and do Plan Z (worst case outcome).

Give it a try, and see if it eases some of your concerns, anxiety, and sleep problems. Just remember, worst case scenario, we can move to Thailand together and live on the beach, giving English lessons to keep your tummy full. Which, to me, is an AWESOME outcome! I'm being overly simplistic here, but that's the point.

View attachment 28216


Hahaha, sorry for laughing out loud! But the 'we can move to Thailand together part' has officially cracked me up :rofl::rofl::rofl: Hey I just met you, and this is crazy...but we can move to Thailand, if all goes tits up, maybe.

Seriously though, thanks for the sound advice matie. As a technical minded person this is a logical approach to an emotional issue which tends to fit is better with our personalities. I do not think it is not too late to use this approach now, and reflect on what happened if I am honest with myself.

There are some big ticket items which we discussed on the INSIDERS briefly, and this needs to be sorted out with top priority. Once it is solved it will be a massive weight lifted. Consequences of failing to complete this are pretty epic, even though it is out of my control at the moment.

Also work (9-5) has taken a hefty step up, as I offered to help out a failing project that is absolutely pissing money, time and resources. It has added a lot of stress to daily life and instead of thanks, or support from management, I get complaints that I am causing trouble and making things too difficult and complicated. Of course they know best, after failing to deliver after 12 years (7 years late, and 7 million over budget). Half the required documentation is missing or not generated and this is a serious serious safety concern. I have forced the team to start building the design from scratch to untangle them from the mess they created. This has been met with nothing but back alley bullshitting and gossip which arrives to me via my little birdies. Tomorrow I will have the discussion with our management, and either revalidate their trust, at let me get the job done or worst case I will retract my offer to help and walk away.

Wow! Very nice process! I feel lighter already. See you in Thailand Monday? haha

Based on the advice you guys have shared, I hope a lot of people can benefit from this thread. Thanks everyone
 

Andy Black

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Hahaha, sorry for laughing out loud! But the 'we can move to Thailand together part' has officially cracked me up :rofl::rofl::rofl: Hey I just met you, and this is crazy...but we can move to Thailand, if all goes tits up, maybe.

Seriously though, thanks for the sound advice matie. As a technical minded person this is a logical approach to an emotional issue which tends to fit is better with our personalities. I do not think it is not too late to use this approach now, and reflect on what happened if I am honest with myself.

There are some big ticket items which we discussed on the INSIDERS briefly, and this needs to be sorted out with top priority. Once it is solved it will be a massive weight lifted. Consequences of failing to complete this are pretty epic, even though it is out of my control at the moment.

Also work (9-5) has taken a hefty step up, as I offered to help out a failing project that is absolutely pissing money, time and resources. It has added a lot of stress to daily life and instead of thanks, or support from management, I get complaints that I am causing trouble and making things too difficult and complicated. Of course they know best, after failing to deliver after 12 years (7 years late, and 7 million over budget). Half the required documentation is missing or not generated and this is a serious serious safety concern. I have forced the team to start building the design from scratch to untangle them from the mess they created. This has been met with nothing but back alley bullshitting and gossip which arrives to me via my little birdies. Tomorrow I will have the discussion with our management, and either revalidate their trust, at let me get the job done or worst case I will retract my offer to help and walk away.

Wow! Very nice process! I feel lighter already. See you in Thailand Monday? haha

Based on the advice you guys have shared, I hope a lot of people can benefit from this thread. Thanks everyone
Me, I’d retract my offer to help and bow out gracefully. It looks like a thankless lose-lose to me. AND it’s adding to your workload too.
 
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