Can't Hurt Me: by David Goggins, Review and Discussion

[MJ DeMarco]

My Rating: 1 stars out of 5 stars


Format: Kindle

The book itself, is ZERO stars. But it gets 1 star because of David's persistence and mental toughness, and of course, his service to the military.

My thoughts/review:

Utterly brutal. So brutal, is it is the only book I ever tried to return back to Amazon. I'll never get back those hours I spent reading this book.

Normally, this is a book I would NOT finish, but this new review format we've launched here on the forum I felt compelled to finish it. In the latter chapters, I started skimming when it was clear it was more of the same.

That said, what we have here is a book that is 90% longer than it needs to be. For those of you who don't want to waste HOURS of your time reading this absolutely trainwreck of a book, let me give you a TLDR:

1. Encounter tough challenge, some of it shock-worthy.
2. Give excruciating details on how to deal, beat, manage that said challenge, from lacing your shoes, to your breathing, to how you just happened to wrap your hands up with tape, foam, or whatever. Repeat same stuff, over, and over, and over again. (This represents 95% of the book)
3. When tough challenge isn't found, seek one out.
4. Enter challenge unprepared, unplanned.
5. Repeat ad nauseum.

Oh yea, then the meat (which is about .08% of this book -- add in some mental exercise to help you break your mental obstacles.)

By the end of the story, I felt sorry for David and he likely suffers from some type of mental illness.

Here is someone who truly does NOT know how to relax and clearly lacks perspective on what truly matters in life.

Some things that irked me...

• David recklessly takes on challenges with little preparation. It is only after failing miserably (and damaging his body) is when he suddenly figures out, "Oh gee, maybe I should plan and prepare better."
• David cares little about ANYTHING when it comes to beating some external challenge, running in the desert, pull-ups, running in the snow, etc. EVERYTHING IN HIS LIFE that doesn't fall into the future challenge category, is a secondary commodity in his life: his time, his relationships, his health, and his mental sanity.
• He makes little mention of his wives, which as I expected, later became ex-wives. It is impossible for any person to be this neurotic and be able to hold a normal relationship. If nothing changes, David will probably either be single for the rest of his life, or only be engaged in dysfunctional relationships.
• This poor man is lost in his head and has little perspective. He's pathological. Neurotic. Clinical.
• David appears to have a glorified, sanitized view of combat as he mentions several times that he wanted to be in combat but was not called up for it. This (again) shows his lack of perspective -- combat is killing other human beings. No sane human being should want to do this.
• In the same vain of perspective, no mention of his child. Does David approach his relationships with those he loves with the same zealotry? Wife? Child? Clearly he does not. Goes back again to perspective.
• It makes ZERO sense to me how someone could waste their life with transient challenges that have transient benefits. In other words, you're working your a$$ off for a trophy? A mental checkmark in your head? WTF? David even says this: "Evaluate your life in its totality. We all waste so much time doing meaningless bullshit!" OMG, my mouth hit the floor. But wasting your entire year (and your relationships) to run X miles in the desert isn't meaningful bullshit? For the love of God, if you're going to disrupt your life, make sure the benefits last longer than a pat on the back, a certificate on the wall, and a mental trophy. For me, "meaningless bullshit" are stupid vanity competitions that help no one but the person doing them.
• The book is deceptively titled: Should be titled: "My Excruciating Detailed Trials and Tribulations in Trying to Conquer My Inner Demons as a Navy Seal and Full Time Extreme Athlete."
• With so many poor decisions he made, utterly destructive to his health/body, I feel he's lucky to be alive. I doubt he'll have a good quality of life as he gets older.

Favorite (or least favorite) chapter:

The last chapter, because that means it was almost done.

Main takeaway:

I'd recommend this book for something OTHER than its purpose.

Hey, you wanna see what it's like to lose perspective on things that matter? Read this book...
Hey, you wanna see what it's like to WIN every battle, but still lose the WAR? Read this book...
Hey, you wanna see someone be reckless with their health just for some mental trophies? Read this book...

Aside from the pathological issues David has, he doesn't seem to employ his own advice as I mentioned above. If you're going to neglect everything in your life, perhaps get something from it that lasts longer than 9 seconds of "I did it!" Obviously this method of achievement hasn't satisfied him. Because it continues. And it continued despite his body CRYING FOR HELP.

In other words, this is a case of the MORES, goals that are always moving. David is a chronic goalpost mover who will never be satisfied, will never relax, and will never stop living in the FUTURE.

David needs to read The Power of Now by Eckart Tolle.

To sum it up, if you want to read a book about a man who WINS self-inflicted battle after battle, but can't quite understand while he continually feels like he is LOSING the war, read this book.

 

[Get Right]

My Rating: 4 stars out of 5 stars

Format: Kindle

My thoughts/review:
My heart was broken in the first chapter. I almost gave up reading the book all together. For some reason, I stuck it out and I'm glad I did. I think David (author) might have liked that. Trauma aside, this book has a lot of ground breaking advice/material. I found multiple areas to test in my own life and have reaped rewards for the effort.

Favorite (or least favorite) chapter:
Chapter 7 was my favorite. This chapter lit me up! The highlight being "Sadly, most of us give up when we've only given around 40% of our maximum effort." This was such a novel idea that I had to test it with a short run (I'm not a runner). When my legs hurt to the point of needing to stop, I reflected on his 40% rule. After my mind conceded I ran the same distance... again...and could have kept going.

Main takeaway:
The mental and the physical parts of our bodies might be more intertwined than we thought. What can the mind push the body to do and vice versa? David lays a pretty good case out there as to his answer(s). My summation would be that we have a lot more in the tank than we think we have (mentally and physically). The only question is how big is your tank? David would probably ask you to find that out by asking "What if?"

 

[MTF]

My Rating: 4 stars out of 5 stars

Format: Kindle

I'm giving the book 4 stars because I think that it could be improved with at least one additional, more practical chapter. It's not really a typical how-to book, but I'd love to read David's perspective and practical advice on exercise, nutrition, recovery, and how to turn yourself into a beast. Or if not specific advice, then I'd be interested in reading more about the past few years in David's life and some of his hard-earned successes as it would balance his struggles and failures (for example, how he transitioned into the job of a fireman).

Also, I can't help but feel that David is still struggling with some inner demons. I had a feeling that he can't really have healthy relationships in his life and that the most important thing that keeps him alive is making himself suffer and constantly face new challenges. This is not really applicable for most of us who don't want to endlessly pursue suffering.

My thoughts/review:

I've already posted my thoughts in a different thread two weeks ago so I'll repost it here:

David made me realize how weak our society today is and how important it is for us, entrepreneurs, to get stronger and keep toughening up. People get offended for no reason, worry about insignificant sh*t, lose their composure when something irritates them a little, or give up just because they faced a tiny obstacle.

If you get good at suffering and pushing through despite immense pain, insurmountable obstacles, and unfairness, then everyday problems won't bother you at all. On the other end of the spectrum, if you stay in your comfort zone, protected from everything that might be unpleasant, then even the tiniest problem will feel like the end of the world.

One of the things I realized thanks to the book is that I'm not pushing myself even 10% as much as I should when it comes to physical fitness, which is one of the best ways to toughen up not only physically, but also mentally. I consider myself fairly fit, but what David does is on another, incomprehensible level. I'm going to change my routine and raise my standards. Time to take some souls.

Additional thoughts today: I wanted to start a new, more hardcore workout plan after I finished the book. Unfortunately I got injured so badly that I can't exercise at all for the unforeseeable future. Instead of pushing my physical limits, I'm now limited to pushing my mental limits (I find it very tough not to be able to exercise). But well, at least I can practice being comfortable with pain (and it hurts like a....).

Favorite (or least favorite) chapter:

Chapter 5, Armored Mind and the concept of a calloused mind. Quote:

Similar to using an opponent’s energy to gain an advantage, leaning on your calloused mind in the heat of battle can shift your thinking as well. Remembering what you’ve been through and how that has strengthened your mindset can lift you out of a negative brain loop and help you bypass those weak, one-second impulses to give in so you can power through obstacles.

Main takeaway:

Toughen up to be prepared for anything that life throws at you.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

but.. it’s not nice. I mean, is this a case of me not having enough mental strength so I feel bad for the guy? Like, I don’t want him to get his feelings hurt.

The man has been thru hell and back ten times. I doubt anything you or I say will hurt him. Remember, "Can't Hurt Me."

My review was not to impugn his many accomplishments. I was duly impressed at the Navy Seal accomplishment. I didn't need the other 321 pages to add to that impression, for me it transformed Goggins from "Damn, this guy kicks a$$ and is a total warrior" to "Damn, this guy is dangerously neurotic and unhinged."

Least favorite: Any of the ones near the end. The story just dragged on. As an exercise scientist, I also had to shake my head when he realized that stretching his muscles might loosen his body up and make him feel better (no duh). Anyone who has studied exercise would have been able to give him a similar answer, but rather he made it sound like it was a medical breakthrough.

Was eye-opening to me as well.

I can't agree with that. I remember very well most, if not all, of the most challenging (voluntarily) moments in my life.

The benefits are lifelong. They helped me develop a lot of self-confidence. Little stuff doesn't matter that much anymore. I'm more relaxed and resilient because a bad moment in my life probably doesn't suck as much as a truly bad moment when I was pushing my limits. Voluntary discomfort toughens you up and makes everyday life much easier.

I totally agree with this, but not in the context of the Goggins story.

After he accomplished the Navy Seal credential, he should have known right then and there that he could accomplish pretty much anything. His worst enemy is always himself. For the average Joe, competing in a marathon definitely would have life long benefits. But Goggins has shown he isn't the average Joe.

So there's even less reason to hate on him

So a negative review of his book and his "all-or-nothing, no planning" philosophy is "hate?" My opinion is based on the message put forward, it is not hate or disrespect. I went in with NO opinion. Never heard of him, other than he had to be a bad a$$ to survive Seal training.

In the first 60 minutes of reading, I enjoyed the book and I cared. By the last, I did not.

The dude is unscripted because he found his happiness.

That's not the impression I got through the reading. He struck me as impulsive, unsettled, dissatisfied, and constantly searching...

It's hard to be happy in the moment, in a relationship, when you're constantly living in the future, some future event, some future accomplishment. I'm sure his ex-wives would agree.

 

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[LuckyPup]

My Rating: 3 stars out of 5 stars

(Actually, I give it 3.5 stars.)

Format: Audible
I've been listening to the Audible version, which has some extras added to enhance the book. Interspersed with the narration is a podcast-like dialogue between Goggins and the author that elaborates on the events in the book. It works for me - makes the book more interesting.

My thoughts/review:
As with that of other larger-than-life figures, Goggins' hero's journey stands in stark contrast to my own less-than-heroic journey and life of relative ease. Maybe it's just me and stuff I have to work through, but after the inspiration wears off, I tend to feel shitty about myself after I read books like this.

Most books like this can be distilled down to some basic life lessons having to do with mindset. I don't mean to minimize Goggins' life experience and I do think we can learn from them, but the cynic in me can't help but think that books in this "warrior-athlete" genre have become a bit formulaic: shitty life > elite military training > further setbacks > ultimate triumph > life lessons.

With that being said, the book is an easy read/listen, because Goggins does have a compelling story which the author tells well enough to help mortals like me live vicariously through Goggins, if only for a bit. Also, I had expected the typical "kid overcomes shitty childhood" story, but I was still surprised by some of Goggins' life experiences. Still hoping to see what becomes of that mo-fo Trunnis, so no spoilers, please!

Favorite (or least favorite) chapter:
Audible's chapters are a mess, but my favorite parts so far (I'm almost done) are:

• When Goggins did a self-intervention and got his act together to learn to read, pass the military entrance exam, etc. Pure FTM. Guess who has Post-It notes on his bathroom mirror now?
• When he dropped 100 lbs in what, 90 days? Inspired me to set a goal to drop 20 in 1Q 2019.
• Relating the BUDS training & hell week stuff. I may be a cynic, but I'm still impressed as hell at the grit these guys have. Aside: I read Lone Survivor and other stuff about Marcus Luttrell, and I had forgotten that he and his brother pulled off that hilarious scam. Classic.
• God's chart. I'm agnostic, but the feeling that I'm not living up to my potential haunts me daily. Long ago I remember reading something to the effect that the greatest sin is not attempting to reach your potential, and it's stuck with me for years.

Main takeaway:
Mindset, mindset, mindset.

Also, I believe the only reason Goggins is here today because his mom finally had an FTE and left Trunnis.

Amended comments:
Main Takeaway: In his quest to be uncommon, Goggins has isolated himself. I get it. I'm also an introvert and don't often play well with others. However, there's more at work with Goggins than plain ol' introversion, and he's paid a price in relationships for being so single-minded. Like many exceptionally single-minded people, he has mastered some aspects of his life, but it wasn't until he faced a crisis that he became self-aware enough to understand that he needed to change in order to succeed in other aspects of his life.

Also, even though I can get cynical about the military hero worship, Goggins has accomplished some truly amazing feats.

 

[Invictus]

My Rating: 5 stars out of 5 stars


Format: Paperback

My thoughts/review:

Disclaimer 1: Before I begin my review, I want to preface it with this. Despite my high rating, I either agree with everything MJ (and many others) say in his review or think it is a fair point.

Going in, I had no experience with David Goggins or his life philosophy. Perhaps if I had seen some of his previous videos or read up on him, I would have found the book a bit more repetitive. Instead, although it seemed to start repeating the deeper I got into the book, it was all still fresh enough to be intriguing.

Damn.

Goggins does not live a life that I want to emulate (for a number of reasons), but that doesn't mean there isn't immense value in his story. And that's why I gave this book such a high rating.

His story is one that could serve as guiding light for many people. You don't need to run until your body is literally dying, but you can push yourself so much farther than you currently are. You can be much more ruthless than you're giving yourself credit for.

I was a bit surprised at some reviews remarking that they didn't learn much. I think the book is far stronger if taken as a memoir than as a standard self-help / personal development book. I've underlined the majority of Unscripted , but it's a textbook (for lack of better word). If MJ wrote a memoir, I likely wouldn't underline as much because the medium would be different, but there would still be enormous value in his story.

That said, the marketing of the book may have set it up as a 'How-to". I didn't even notice the subtitle of the book was "Master Your Mind And Defy the Odds" until after I read it! Instead, I was happy just to get the 10% of instruction/challenges.

Goggins is a north star. Almost a mythological figure. I don't want to be him, but I do want to consider him when I work. I want to strive for his determination, his mental fortitude, his perseverance.

The book gets a 5/5 simply because I haven't read anything that conveyed this much sheer willpower. This much acceptance of pain and demanding more.

Everything today is about happiness. And while there's nothing wrong with wanting happiness, we can't always escape discomfort and pain.

We talk too much about work-life balance. About being 'you'. About following passion. But Goggins says f that. Follow the pain. Make yourself stronger.

Everything said about Goggins personally (moving goalposts, letting relationships suffer, focusing too much on the battle) I think is on the money. And if I read the book as a "This is exactly how you should live your life", it would have a much worse rating.

Instead, I read it as a niche subject. "This is my story. This is how I break my mental barriers. You can take what you want out of it." That's what gives it 5/5, because it's not about 'creating your 100% life' it's about destroying your mental limitations. On that front, I think it does amazingly well.

Favorite (or least favorite) chapter:
The 100 Mile Race, for a few reasons.

1) It really sunk home to me that the human body can do *amazing* things. And can be pushed so much more than I thuoght. I thought this would have been literally impossible, but Goggins did it. As long as you can handle your governor, you can do sooooo much more than what anyone will imagine.

2) It reminded me that Goggins is not someone I want to be. He literally put his life on the line to finish that race. I never want to do that just for athletics.

3) It showed me that Goggins' spirit is something to emulate. I don't want to run 100 miles with no training, but I do want to say "F*ck stopping. I can keep going and conquer this."

In close second for my favorite chapter, is the one where he mentions he compartmentalized or planned out his life. He didn't have time to train constantly, so he woke up early, biked to work, ate at his desk, worked out during lunch, and biked back. It's a reminder about the things we could do if we reorganized our lives.


Main takeaway:
I don't want to imitate Goggins in a lot of things (hell, probably most) but there are two parts of his story we should take to heart.

1) You are capable of so, so much more than you think you are.

Goggins serves as a physical example of what your body can do if you push past your perceived limits. The man ran a hundred miles with no training for god's sake!

Now, he did almost kill himself doing it (one of the reasons Goggins is not someone to 100% emulate). But that's someone breaking through an extreme barrier through sheer will. Something we can find value from.

If you're running two miles a day for exercise, can you channel some of Goggins? Can you push harder? If Goggins' body is to be believed, you can probably go double without any real issue.

A particularly valuable part of this is the way Goggins (and many military personnel) just shrug off certain 'hurdles'. He mentions that he worked training into his daily routine. Twenty-five miles to work? Screw it, he rode his bike there.

Can you imagine bringing a concept like that to the majority of the population? Even if the scenario was easier?

"Hey, your work is only a few miles. Why not ride your bike there?"

"What? Oh no, I couldn't do that!" And then they complain that they don't have time to bike 30 mins to an hour at the gym.

We set up these mental barriers that, the majority of the time, we don't try to break through at all. Physically, our bodies can do insane things. It's the mental wall that stops us.

The funny thing is, people who have to do these things often do. If someone has to walk miles to work, they'll do it. There simply isn't another option.

But let someone drive to work then take the car away. They'll throw an absolute fit. They couldn't fathom getting to work in a non-motorized way.

Your body can do absolutely insane things. The vast majority of us could run ultramarathons, Iron Man races, and more. All we need to do is break the mental barriers.

This isn't to say you should push your body to its literal limits and cause your kidneys to start failing.

Goggins is an extreme example of pushing limits. But by going to that extreme, he can be a sort of 'North Star' for you. Whether you're working out, working on your Fastlane business, etc, you can ask yourself "Am I only giving this 40%? Could I hit this harder. Could I push through the pain? What would Goggins do?"

If he was more moderate, I don't think he would work as that north star.

Even if his life is not something you want to live, Goggins' ruthless pursuit of pushing his physical limits is a great guiding force for your life.


2) What The HELL Is Your Excuse?

If anyone had a pass to just try and coast through life, it would be Goggins. With such a rough start, if he had gotten through his stint in the Air Force and built himself a relatively stable life, I would say he had come far.

Abusive father. Poor. Failing student. Stutterer. Obese. Heart condition.

The same man that, at one point, had those qualities also was also:

Navy Seal. Endurance Athlete. Graduate of Army Ranger School. Public speaker. Record Holder.

Again, if he just secured a 'stable life', I'd say he'd come far. And I don't think I'd be the only person to think that.

He took ownership. Because even if things weren't his fault, it was up to him to change them.

So what's my excuse? What's yours?







P.S. I might write-up something I noticed in my reading. Not sure how many people are Star Wars nerds, but Goggins is essentially a real-life Sith. The way he uses pain and utilizes his emotions as opposed to trying to get 'zen'.

 

[MTF]

Why doesn't he doesn't talk about his relationship struggles? Training that much has to be taxing on a relationship. What happened with him and his kid!?
I know it's probably personal, and he doesn't want to discuss it. At the same time I think it's a important thing he's missing from his book all these accomplishments had to cost him, but he doesn't talk about it. I struggle with this myself trying to be an ace at things I do has cost me several relationships. So I am not judging.

This is one of my gripes with the book. Of course, it's personal, but if you're writing an autobiography, then it's pretty much the definition of this genre. While his accomplishments are inspiring, I've found it sad that his wives and kid (kids?) are almost like a footnote in his story. It shows how deeply concentrated he is on pushing his limits, but it also shows how much he still has to learn about balance in life.

In the conclusion of the book he talks about learning how to stretch. It would tie in nicely with the realization that life isn't only about suffering, pushing your limits, and being tough and perhaps discovering that he can still do these things without pushing everyone away. But I don't know David, so perhaps he actually has great relationships now but just wasn't willing to talk about them in the book.

Still, I think that it's a crucial lesson that's missing in the book. It's inspiring to talk about pushing yourself to the limits, but in the long term it's as unsustainable as entrepreneurs working 12 hours a day, seven days a week at the expense of everything else.

 

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[biophase]

My Rating: 4 stars out of 5 stars


Format: Audible

My thoughts/review:
Finished it yesterday. Many things have already been discussed so I'm just going to give you my perspective on his mindset.

I already knew most of his life story from podcasts and other books. I'm a fan of his and this book is basically what I thought it would be. I actually liked the back half more than the front half.

Maybe I like him more than others here because I mountain bike and am often wanting to rest and give up on a long climb. Maybe that's why I especially liked the ultra endurance chapters. I've been where he was and pushed through it and thought "damn" I thought I was done 30 minutes ago. I've been at the point where walking 60 feet to go to the bathroom was a huge ordeal.

I totally can relate to his inner talk. A few years ago while climbing Kilimanjaro, during a really tough time, I leaned over to another forum member and said, this makes starting a business feel easy. Again, it's all mindset, we know both are hard, but when you accomplish something hard, the next challenge feels a little bit easier or more attainable.

Interesting note is that he believes in strengthening your mind through experiencing pain and toughness. Jordan Peterson believes that going through diversity unlocks your potential. Both believe that pain and failure make you better, but Goggin's is saying you are at level 0 going to level 100, whereas Peterson says level 100 is in you, but your mind is locked at level 0.

I think the audible part added alot to this book. For those who read the book, you didn't get the background information on some of the chapters and the stories that made the chapters make more sense. I'd recommend going that route vs. reading it.

What I got out of this book...

There is a bike trail that is 10 miles from my condo in Colorado. We've always driven the 10 miles and started from the trailhead. The locals ride from town to the trail and back, about 25 miles round trip. This is a ride that my friends and I have always thought impossible for us. But after reading this book, I've challenged my friends to do this, this summer. We are calling it the Goggin's challenge. It's something I cringe at just thinking about it. But I think we are ready, we just have to start early in the morning!

My recommendation for those that have read this book, whether they liked it or not is to find something that you don't think you can do and really think about doing it. Think about why you don't think you can do it. Is it a mindset issue, physical issue, etc... Then figure out how you can accomplish it. I'll post back on this thread when I've completed my Goggin's challenge.

 

[ZF Lee]

Thanks MJ.

My Rating: 4 stars out of 5 stars



My thoughts/review:
I was thinking of pouring out everything, since I saw a lot of myself in David Goggins, although my dad didn't exactly beat me to a pulp and I'm not in the Navy SEALS. I was thinking of including my own relevant experiences here, and how Goggins' principles fit in...but since this thread is not on ZF Lee, I re-edited my post a few times.

I'll just say that I am no stranger to military-style training, as I was pretty much in the drill department for the Boys Brigade (BB) uniform group in high school.

I'll work on posting my tales on here one of these days.

Many of his concepts for uncommon success are strikingly similar to Dan Pena's. Dan Pena has a whole website page dedicated to insane feats he did on his own, BTW (he also served in the army for a bit, if I can remember). So I guess Dan Pena isn't much of a farce as some might assume him to be.

Goggins detailed a lot of his pain and sufferings throughout his military training and subsequent marathons. Lots of process to learn from, even if our goals are not physically-orientated.

I felt that Goggins' success principles still need some polishing, especially on the people part. No successful person got there alone. Goggins does express regret at the final chapters of not being 'more friendly' to others along the way, which may have contributed to a hit on his career in some manner. I am glad I did go out of my way to work with others during my past days in BB, as well as my time on TFLF and freelancing, but there is always room for improvement.

He does express a lot of appreciation for people like the Admiral, who got him into recruiting, as well as his SEALS trainer, the Silverback Gorilla (lol). Felt there was a lot more he could talk about on their exchanges, the same way MJ DeMarco learned from Gary the limo passenger who sold his company for $50 million.

Next, David Goggins mentioned that he made some blunders in not training enough for his earlier marathons, ending up running till he pissed blood, literally. I think that he should emphasize this part more, the importance of setting up wider time frames and even denote a unique CHALLENGE for that (there are CHALLENGES for each chapter's end for us to do).

He did discuss a tactic he learned from the military, which is something like charting alternative routes of travel during a combat mission, but he only started talking about it when he noted that he failed to use this method to research routes for his marathons. I would like to see him tell about a successful tale of the application of that tactic, so that we can see how it should be done. Still, this does dispel the notion that you don't need a Plan B and C, and raises the importance of managing risk.

I have started on his CHALLENGES, and the first is to note down every 'bad hand' that serves as an excuse for not progressing. I spent an hour on it, and often I had to walk away from the laptop because it was painful. But I did it. Now I have more fuel to use, than just the mere FTE I put down on TFLF.

Now I will be doing the next challenge, which is to set up an Accountability mirror. I should keep this apart from my regular planner, which was a mistake of me to mash both together earlier.

If any of you want to stick to the books, I would suggest that you pair the Goggins' CHALLENGES with stuff like the Slight Edge, The One Thing, Miracle Morning and The War of Art.

Favorite (or least favorite) chapter:

The Navy SEALS training chapters. Definitely.

Least favourite? None, except for the few parts when he mentions briefly that he broke up with 2 marriages. That must have been a side effect or price of his relentless focus on success. I won't judge him for that, but I feel that it could have been managed better, and he could have done better to educate his SOs better on his vision for life.

Unfortunately he did not discuss that in detail, but I can understand that he might want to keep some matters private.

I had the great fortune of having a girl who declared that she 'liked BB boys' like me. She understood the degree of work I had to put in and respected it. I think that unconsciously, my dedication to the BB company was what planted a seed for the later years, when I would eventually see her as more than a friend (and reach out to Fastlane for that matter).



Main takeaway:

I'll leave you with just two:

1. Cookie jar.

Goggins describe a survival technique that I had struggled for so long to express in words and detail.

In a nutshell, this involves the drawing of positive emotions of a sense of satisfaction from a past positive experience (i.e. from beating the Navy SEALS tests, grabbing a Guinness records in Goggins' case), like a cookie jar, to counter the negative-feedback/ harsh mental environment of doing any tough challenge.

In high school, I struggled with a lot of STEM subjects, so whenever I made a breakthrough in one exam, I would keep that paper for the next time I was struggling to break through one tough topic. Whenever I felt discouraged at a Physics topic, I would just look back at my past breakthroughs and know that I have won before, and can win again. I also would think back to my years in the BB, and draw on the emotions, the sense of pride after overcoming the societal norms and mental crap.

I scored 10As for my final high school exams, the highest in my school.

I actually deploy a 'reverse Cookie Jar' method. Drawing positive emotions and strength from a future, instead of the past.

I can think of two times I used the 'reverse Cookie Jar' method.

Tough to do, but I'll explain.

#1 During my first day in drill camp, an officer from another company saw that I did my turns the wrong way. So he made me do it over and over again until I was aching and ashamed all over, nearly in tears.

During bedtime, I was thinking of faking sick and going home, like one of the folks from my school did that evening.

Then out of the blue, in my sleeping bad, in the darkness, a picture came to my mind.

It was of my future. A desired one. It had not happened, but I was working towards it.

It was of me standing in the parade square commanding the entire company. Standing proud, smart, dignified. My drill commands were absolute, clear, precise. Instead of chaos, there was order, dedication and discipline amongst the ranks. I saw faces of unnamed boys whom I would train to be better, more steadfast than I am.

It was like seeing a harvest that hadn't sprouted yet. Or a feast that you hadn't cooked or hunted for yet.

A voice in me said, 'You can create this. Feel that pride? Satisfaction? You can have a place there.'

So I stuck on. Failed that first attempt, but succeeded after a few re-tries.

Haven't got a personal photo of the badge, but here's it.

I got to play roles in company parades, serving as a Section Commande and Company Bugler, in at least 3-4 Guard of Honours.

2# Last year, around this time, I had just found out I got rejected by Upwork.

I felt like just tossing in the towel again. And just go do something else....

Then I thought about it.

The creating of a profile for Upwork was like crafting a sales proposal.

I looked at my Whatsapp messages to my girl. I looked back at my promise to learn the ways of the Fastlane, to teach her things that could free her.

I reached out to the 'future cookie jar'.

What future did I desire?

I saw myself spending time with my girl, discussing how to create and communicate value to her clients. I saw her eyes widen, as her brain broke past the limits placed upon her mind.

I saw her putting away her university certs. She didn't need them any more.

I saw her having tea in the morning, late at 11am. She didn't need to go and work for money, because she learned from my experiences, applied them, and freed herself.

Wouldn't you be happy having those things? I would.

So I drew all that into myself, and pressed myself to rewrite the damn pitch for Upwork. And got ACCEPTED.

I now had some experiences to tell my girl. Another step to her freedom.



2. There is no 'ultimate goal'

I ran into this concept myself, but didn't acknowledge it fully until now.

After completing my Boys' Brigade Basic Drill Badge, I realised there was more.

There was the entire Guard of Honour procedures. The Colour Party, the wheeling in of the entire company, section drills (not sure exactly what they served for...the other Corporals and Sergeants from the neighbouring Companies never put them into daily practice lol enough to tell me),, etc.

For studies, after an exam, I usually just thought, 'That was it.'

Wrong. There was the mid-terms, finals, pre-university, university, Masters, PhDs, the list goes on.

There was no fixed level of Mastery. Only evolution and constant improvement.

Even for Fastlane businesses, I took a hard look at why some millionaires and successful entrepreneurs failed at some new ventures, even if the projects were within their expertise.

Built a $10 million company? Great, now lets make a $100 million company, with investors, IPO, and a board!

There would be always a new Wild West to explore, what with new technology and knowledge today.

I like it that Goggins didn't get high and mighty about just being a Navy SEALS. He could have just stayed there. After all, many military men stay in the same department for pretty much their whole lives. He moved on and did all kinds of stuff, until he was involved in all three components of the military. He served as an instructor and recruiter. Still, there was so much room that he could go to, in retrospect.



SIDE NOTE: That was exhausting to do all the writing and editing. I know why copywriting is a high-paying gig....this shit IS the barrier of ENTRY

 

[G-Man]

Half way through and not sure if I can finish. He’s an impressive human being in many ways and has accomplished things I will never accomplish, so it feels weird to criticize, but here goes.

He has intense almost unstoppable drive, but seems to lack a sense of proportion, and a why that is meaningful. For all of the chest thumping, he strikes me as someone with a sense of inferiority that goes deeper than deep.

Also- and I’m sorry that I can’t think of a non-judge mental way to phrase this, but I have a hard time listening to people that walk out on their families talk about perseverance. In a weird way, abuse aside, he’s probably turned out a lot more like his dad than he realizes. Dudes that hate their dads almost always do.

 

[MTF]

Best things to do would be to:
1. Tell your loved ones who are affected directly by your actions what you'll be doing
2. Tell them that they might not be seeing much of you

IMO that's the type of BS they like to sell people today just because it sounds so sexy and praiseworthy. You'll get more likes on Facebook when you post stuff like "Time to get to work, 12-hour workdays here we go. I don't have time to hang out with losers so see ya when I'm rich and famous, peasants!" than when you say "I'm going to put in a few hours of concentrated work on my business every single day for however long it takes. Grateful to share this journey with my family and friends."

If anything, working so hard that your family and friends don't see much of you is a sign of incompetence than a badge of honor.

I believed this hard work BS when I was younger, too (particularly in sports). Now that I'm getting older and learn that I'm not indestructible, I'm finally beginning to realize that it doesn't matter what you do every now and then; it matters what you do every day.

No matter what the gurus say, you can't maintain high intensity every day. Your choice largely comes down to doing something consistently and safely every day (so that you can do it for decades) or pushing yourself well beyond your limits only to get injured, burn out, or lose everything important in life.

Goggins would have certainly achieved better results if he took the time to properly recover from each of his races and balance strength workouts with stretching, manual therapy and injury prevention. He eventually learned this lesson, but at what expense?

I don't want to generalize, but I find it queer that folks who have been physically abused before tend to look for great success in the physical field, be it sports, gym or military (in Goggins' case)? Is there a correlation? Replacing one master with another?

Definitely. Similar with alcoholics who often quit drinking only to get obsessed (in an unsustainable way) about sports or other physical challenges. I'm wired the same way (obsessive by nature, not because of my childhood or any addictions) so need to be watchful not to throw my life completely out of balance.

 

[luniac]

My Rating: 5 stars out of 5 stars


Format: ebook

My thoughts/review:
I've watched many of his interviews before the book came out and I've always respected the "warrior" mentality, so to be fair I was biased to like his story from the start.
I feel his general message "get comfortable being uncomfortable" is so infectious for many us because it hits the nail on the head regarding modern society's aversion to any kind of pain, mental or physical.

Since i watched so many of his interviews, i was especially curious how this man of infinite pain tolerance came into being, and the book really goes into detail how he started of soft and emotionally scarred but slowly over the years transformed himself into the man he is today through methodical power of will and simply not giving a F*ck about dying.

These are the types of stories that really hit me hard, because it cuts through the veil of civility, society, normalcy, etc like a hot knife through butter.
It's like Mike Tyson said "Everyone's got a plan until they get punched in the face."
You may not like his extreme lifestyle, his relationship faults(as other reviews have mentioned), etc but you can't deny this is one of the realest books out there, and that's just fukin refreshing for me. It's refreshing in the same type of way Unscripted is.


Favorite (or least favorite) chapter:
I enjoyed all the chapters but for the sake of picking something ill pick the governor chapter. He compares the brain limitations like the governor on a car engine. He says you can gradually push the governor limit higher and higher by pushing against your brain's limit.
Although i think we all know this, but it's nice to see it explicitly stated and based of a brutal experience of running the 100 mile race.

My least favorite part was that he didn't go in depth on the mental quietness that he mentioned in one of his interviews. I feel that's a critical aspect of finding your inner willpower to push through hardship.
He just says whenever he hit a snag that he simply went deep and found a way, maybe there's not much more to be said but i wish there was more emphasis there.

Main takeaway:
The main takeaway may be a bit unusual to some, but basically I feel less like David Goggins taught me something, and more like he REMINDED me that discomfort is a natural factor of lifes experiences.
I feel like i've always knew this but over the years i've gotten soft around the edges and simply forgotten.
I catch myself sometimes now automatically rethinking doing something because of some perceived unpleasant aspects, and i'm like "whoa wtf stop, embrace the pain buddy, this is it, this is life, its ok"

The most critical takeaway of all for me though and one that transcends the whole extreme lifestyle of David Goggins, is it's not about being uncomfortable, it's about doing what you gotta do. Discomfort should have as much say in your decision making as the color of the sky.
It would be absurd to say "oh shit the sky is a shade of red, so im not hitting the gym today", but if society really worked that way then it wouldn't feel absurd at all, it'd be completely normal.

I think society today has an absurd aversion to discomfort and made it normal, we really are overall softer than the hard men of back in the day who just did what had to be done.
It's actually sad that it takes an over the top extreme individual like David Goggins to snap us out of this absurdity and face the truth.
Although i'm certain that even in some kind of Warrior society David would still be considered hardcore, he wouldn't be the same level of inspirational that he is today.


P.S.
David's feats are also a good reference to what the body can handle. I try to do 1000 jumping jacks a day and i also do leg day workout once a week, and eventually when my legs get sore i'd take some time off. Now i just think "David ran 100 miles and almost killed himself, wtf is a little soreness", and i just push through it. And you know what, the soreness went away anyway.

I don't necessarily go out of my way to make my life brutal, i actually try to find the most efficient way to do stuff, BUT when discomfort is unavoidable I will never let that stop me again.
Even when you do everything right, pain can still happen, that's the human experience, and David's story reminded me to embrace that pain.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Let's roll! Now a big best-seller, what do you think of the book?

While I'm not shocked, I was unable to find a suitable format to discuss the book using this software, Xenforo. Another reason why I don't recommend Xenforo as forum software. So instead of discussing chapter by chapter (which will probably clutter the front page) I decided we should try using this format:

My Rating: 3 stars out of 5 stars

(The STAR/X emojis are under the emoji icon, under "commenting icons.")

Format: Audible

My thoughts/review:
Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry's standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type and scrambled it to make a type specimen book. It has survived not only five centuries, but also the leap into electronic typesetting, remaining essentially unchanged. It was popularised in the 1960s with the release of Letraset sheets containing Lorem Ipsum passages, and more recently with desktop publishing software like Aldus PageMaker including versions of Lorem Ipsum.

Favorite (or least favorite) chapter:
Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry's standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type and scrambled it to make a type specimen book. It has survived not only five centuries, but also the leap into electronic typesetting, remaining essentially unchanged. It was popularised in the 1960s with the release of Letraset sheets containing Lorem Ipsum passages, and more recently with desktop publishing software like Aldus PageMaker including versions of Lorem Ipsum.

Main takeaway:
Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry's standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type and scrambled it to make a type specimen book. It has survived not only five centuries, but also the leap into electronic typesetting, remaining essentially unchanged. It was popularised in the 1960s with the release of Letraset sheets containing Lorem Ipsum passages, and more recently with desktop publishing software like Aldus PageMaker including versions of Lorem Ipsum.

Once posted, FEEL FREE to comment on anyone's review/thoughts/takeaway.

PS: This is NOT my review.

 

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[Patrick Jones]

My Rating: 2 stars out of 5 stars

Format: epub

My thoughts/review:
It's an entertaining read, but 70+ pages into the book (where I stopped), I hadn't taken a single note. There was nothing for me to take away, nothing I wanted to put into action. In comparison: That far into TMF , my Evernote note was already bursting with ideas.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Now at 60% finished (Kindle). If we didn't have this thread and I felt accountable for a review, I wouldn't finish it. IMO, there are so many things wrong with this book, with this mentality (others have graced on some of it) not sure what others see in it. That's my judgement thus far but I will continue on until I get to 100%... I'll detail more in my review. Hoping something changes in the final 40%.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Also- and I’m sorry that I can’t think of a non-judge mental way to phrase this, but I have a hard time listening to people that walk out on their families talk about perseverance. In a weird way, abuse aside, he’s probably turned out a lot more like his dad than he realizes. Dudes that hate their dads almost always do.

Goes to perspective which I mention.

As for some of the reviews which speak positively about breaking mental obstacles and "enduring the pain", that sounds great in a book. But when you apply it, there can be detrimental consequences for life.

I used to visualize myself lifting huge amounts of weight at the gym. I psyched myself up to be superhuman. And you know what? It F*cking worked for a short period of time. I'd be able to do tricep dips with 3 45lb plates strapped to my waist, bench presses that would catch the eye of the meatheads where they'd say "WTF? How's that small dude lifting that much?" At the end of the day, my muscles got bigger but at a tremendous cost. My joints, tendons and other soft tissue could not handle the load. (I have a small frame) so I ended up on an orthopedic surgeon's table multiple times with multiple surgeries to correct the stress I put them under.

Now I can't lift shit without stress pain in all of these areas that had to have surgery.

The muscle atrophied and now a gym visit is simply to fight the sands of time which wants to erase more muscle.

These pains come compliment of a strong mental attitude as Goggins professes: "Stop being a pussy, fight through it -- you can do anything!"

Yea, I did it.

And now I can't.

And no mental attitude will change that, but the mental attitude put me there.

Health is not like money, you can't buy more. Treating your health so callously is, well, callous.

 

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[LuckyPup]

My Rating: 4 stars out of 5 stars

Format: Kindle

I'm giving the book 4 stars because I think that it could be improved with at least one additional, more practical chapter. It's not really a typical how-to book, but I'd love to read David's perspective and practical advice on exercise, nutrition, recovery, and how to turn yourself into a beast. Or if not specific advice, then I'd be interested in reading more about the past few years in David's life and some of his hard-earned successes as it would balance his struggles and failures (for example, how he transitioned into the job of a fireman).

Also, I can't help but feel that David is still struggling with some inner demons. I had a feeling that he can't really have healthy relationships in his life and that the most important thing that keeps him alive is making himself suffer and constantly face new challenges. This is not really applicable for most of us who don't want to endlessly pursue suffering.

My thoughts/review:

I've already posted my thoughts in a different thread two weeks ago so I'll repost it here:

David made me realize how weak our society today is and how important it is for us, entrepreneurs, to get stronger and keep toughening up. People get offended for no reason, worry about insignificant sh*t, lose their composure when something irritates them a little, or give up just because they faced a tiny obstacle.

If you get good at suffering and pushing through despite immense pain, insurmountable obstacles, and unfairness, then everyday problems won't bother you at all. On the other end of the spectrum, if you stay in your comfort zone, protected from everything that might be unpleasant, then even the tiniest problem will feel like the end of the world.

One of the things I realized thanks to the book is that I'm not pushing myself even 10% as much as I should when it comes to physical fitness, which is one of the best ways to toughen up not only physically, but also mentally. I consider myself fairly fit, but what David does is on another, incomprehensible level. I'm going to change my routine and raise my standards. Time to take some souls.

Additional thoughts today: I wanted to start a new, more hardcore workout plan after I finished the book. Unfortunately I got injured so badly that I can't exercise at all for the unforeseeable future. Instead of pushing my physical limits, I'm now limited to pushing my mental limits (I find it very tough not to be able to exercise). But well, at least I can practice being comfortable with pain (and it hurts like a....).

Favorite (or least favorite) chapter:

Chapter 5, Armored Mind and the concept of a calloused mind. Quote:

Similar to using an opponent’s energy to gain an advantage, leaning on your calloused mind in the heat of battle can shift your thinking as well. Remembering what you’ve been through and how that has strengthened your mindset can lift you out of a negative brain loop and help you bypass those weak, one-second impulses to give in so you can power through obstacles.

Main takeaway:

Toughen up to be prepared for anything that life throws at you.

First, I'm sorry to hear of your injury - heal fast, heal well!

Second, I agree that we have become WAY too soft as a society, and I also like the "callous" imagery. It makes me hopeful that younger generations have recognized that comfort isn't nirvana and are embracing the "do hard shit" mantra. I think this awakening explains the appeal of this book and others that deliver a similar message, one that MJ espouses, and I paraphrase: "Fall in love with the process, not the event." Crucial and timeless advice, for sure. It calls to mind a poem I read long ago called, "The Station." (scroll down to read).

Third, I forgot to post another key concept I liked - "taking souls." It's a creative way to approach an adversarial relationship.

Fourth, I'm the poster child for the "worrying about tomorrow so much that it robs me of today, leaving me with yesterdays of regret" phenomenon. Even cancer didn't give me the kick in the a$$ I needed. The only solution I've found to remedy this tragedy is to show up every day, to stack small victories and in the process, create a meaningful life and hopefully, a worthwhile legacy. Books like "Can't Hurt Me" are a reminder to show up, embrace the suck and build a life on your own terms.

The Station​

Tucked away in our subconscious minds is an idyllic vision. We see ourselves on a long, long trip that almost spans the continent. We’re traveling by passenger train, and out the windows we drink in the passing scene of cars on nearby highways, of children waving at a crossing, of cattle grazing on a distant hillside, of smoke pouring from a power plant, of row upon row of corn and wheat, of flatlands and valleys, of mountains and rolling hills, of biting winter and blazing summer and cavorting spring and docile fall.

But uppermost in our minds is the final destination. On a certain day at a certain hour we will pull into the station. There sill be bands playing, and flags waving. And once we get there so many wonderful dreams will come true. So many wishes will be fulfilled and so many pieces of our lives finally will be neatly fitted together like a completed jigsaw puzzle. How restlessly we pace the aisles, damning the minutes for loitering … waiting, waiting, waiting, for the station.

However, sooner or later we must realize there is no one station, no one place to arrive at once and for all. The true joy of life is the trip. The station is only a dream. It constantly outdistances us.

“When we reach the station that will be it!” we cry. Translated it means, “When I’m 18, that will be it! When I buy a new 450 SL Mercedes Benz, that will be it! When I put the last kid through college, that will be it! When I have paid off the mortgage, that will be it! When I win a promotion, that will be it! When I reach the age of retirement, that will be it! I shall live happily ever after!”

Unfortunately, once we get it, then it disappears. The station somehow hides itself at the end of an endless track

“Relish the moment” is a good motto, especially when coupled with Psalm 118:24: “This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.” It isn’t the burdens of today that drive men mad. Rather, it is regret over yesterday or fear of tomorrow. Regret and fear are twin thieves who would rob us of today.

So, stop pacing the aisles and counting the miles. Instead, climb more mountains, eat more ice cream, go barefoot oftener, swim more rivers, watch more sunsets, laugh more and cry less. Life must be lived as we go along. The station will come soon enough.

 

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[biophase]

I'm about 60% done also and it's an ok book. I'm a Goggins fan and I didn't even know that he had a kid. He never talks about it at all.

But keep in mind that Goggin's fame came from Jesse Itzler's book 30 days with a seal. In the book, Jesse never mentions Goggins by name because he never wanted anyone to know who he was. Eventually after the book came out, internet sleuths figured out who it was and that's how he was discovered. He does talk about himself alot but personally I don't feel like it's coming from a place where he's an attention craver.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

when he literally could care less about how everyone else sees him.

Yes that's obvious. That's a function of the mental illness ... if a doctor tells him he's killing himself, he simply don't care. Evidence can't compete when there's a new marathon to run in the desert.

He cares about nothing except personal, internal battles that in the grand scheme of things, means nothing. He doesn't strike me as a good husband, a good father, a good friend, a good employee, a good anything, but a good athlete/soldier that can overcome mental hurdles.

I don't care how many marathons he wins, how many trophies he raises, or how many hospitalizations he has to endure for the recklessness caused by his mental illness.

They only place I'd want this guy in my life is in a foxhole ... which is pretty much how he lives his life.

If that's something you admire, then have at it. He's struck you as so heroic, that you've now chosen to spend your precious life energy defending him.

No problem, I'm here to lend a non-PC outlier opinion for other folks who might want to go down the same dangerous and destructive rabbit hole of "all or nothing" on superficial things that mean absolutely nothing in the universe, or to a lessor extent, the human experience.

From a psychological perspective, it's no different than dealing with oniomania, or being a shopaholic. The victim thinks happiness will be found in the next purchase, the next shopping spree, the next new store to visit. But the happiness found in these pursuits is fleeting and transient, which is why the next "challenge" (or purchase) is sought.

Clinically speaking the mental illness is identical; they're the same and symptomatic of low self esteem, emotional problems, materialism (earthly things of a transient nature) and poor impulse control (stay in the hospital to recover? Hell no, I gotta finish the race!).

How to Get Help for Shopping Addiction or Compulsive Buying

Compulsive shopping, known as oniomania, can lead to debt and hoarding. If you are affected by your own or someone else's shopping addiction, there's help available.

www.verywellmind.com

I'd guess his rough childhood is to blame as childhood trauma tends to always carry into adulthood.

just because to you it seems that it’s “putting your life in danger” to others it’s another calculated risk.

You need a lesson in "calculated risk" and sheer stupidity.

It's almost like you didn't even read the book.

I know it’s hard to fathom why people do such great things, but it all boils down to: “because they can.”

And because culture views a man who risks everything in his life, including his own, to run in the desert for mental trophies "because they can" is why society is falling apart.

Great? No, sickness.

The same type of sickness that has 20 year olds committing suicide because their life doesn't measure up to the bullshit posted on Instagram.

Where you a good father?
A good husband?
A good friend?
A good co-worker?
A good entrepreneur that touched lives?
A good human who made a difference?

No, I ran in the desert and destroyed my health in the process.

Awesome role model.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

That said, if anyone wants to learn how to control their mind to defeat inner challenges, I would suggest looking into meditation, Zen or Buddhist philosophies, not the recklessness this man advocates.

 

[MTF]

It makes ZERO sense to me how someone could waste their life with transient challenges that have transient benefits. In other words, you're working your a$$ off for a trophy? A mental checkmark in your head? WTF? David even says this: "Evaluate your life in its totality. We all waste so much time doing meaningless bullshit!" OMG, my mouth hit the floor. But wasting your entire year (and your relationships) to run X miles in the desert isn't meaningful bullshit? For the love of God, if you're going to disrupt your life, make sure the benefits last longer than a pat on the back, a certificate on the wall, and a mental trophy. For me, "meaningless bullshit" are stupid vanity competitions that help no one but the person doing them.

Having done some similar challenges (not even 1/10th of the difficulty of what David does, though), I can't agree with that. I remember very well most, if not all, of the most challenging (voluntarily) moments in my life.

The benefits are lifelong. They helped me develop a lot of self-confidence. Little stuff doesn't matter that much anymore. I'm more relaxed and resilient because a bad moment in my life probably doesn't suck as much as a truly bad moment when I was pushing my limits. Voluntary discomfort toughens you up and makes everyday life much easier.

I don't participate in extreme races as I value my health too much to engage in them (it's interesting that extreme runners seem to value health, but don't mind ruining their bodies each race), but I understand why people participate in them. Yes, some of them probably do it for vanity, but a lot are doing it to test themselves, to face their inner demons, get tougher, or to raise funds for a worthy cause (then it does help other people, not only them). That's what actually made David enter this world - he raises funds for the Special Operations Warrior Foundation.

What is it that draws the masses to buy and recommend this book to others while it seems like the majority of us here don't seem to like it much?

It's polarizing. Plenty of people here enjoyed it, and plenty of people hated it, too.

It's good for the discussion here on the forum as well.

 

[Primeperiwinkle]

Format Kindle
Caveat- the star thing is difficult for me. IMHO Five Star ratings are for books that I know I will reread every couple years for the rest of my life. Very, very few books fit in that category. I will never read this book again and I don’t feel the need to recommend it to anyone I know.. or even buy it in print for my kids to read.

I’m glad he wrote the book though because I’m sure it’s helped ppl and I think it was worth the money if only because I got to hear his story. I love stories. Although this is the first Modern Overcoming Warrior Type book I’ve ever read, so I really have nothing to compare it to.

(I think Oliver Twist, The Once and Future King, or Kim teach the same lessons better.)

Big Takeaways: 1.) I don’t embrace suffering or discomfort. At all. As soon as I finished the book I started reallly dissecting this and asking “How can I embrace discomfort and push towards it?”
2.) When I work out I only push myself if I’m competing against somebody else. The idea that I have a mental governor that stops me at 40% is liberating cuz now I know to tell it to shut up.

Problems: The relationship aspect is extremely troublesome to me. I wouldn’t want a life like his.. but he seems satisfied so I guess that’s cool. I’m glad he reunited with his brother at the end but it sounds like he has a slew (sp?) of poor relationships. People get much farther in life with a team. It’s sad about the wives but.. I’ve dated an Army Ranger AND a guy who did Ironmans. With men, it seems like you either get a lot of grit or a lot of emotional iq, rarely both in equal measure.

Ok, now for the questions which have been floating around in my skull..

If this guy was a friend of yours at 25 or 35 would you confront him about anything or support his efforts? How?

I’m a single mom of two boys ages 8 and 5. How can I model, teach, or encourage the qualities Goggins has that helped him to persevere on a regular basis?

Does Goggins pursue pain because that’s his happy place? He was kinda trained to be in pain.. from such a young age. Wouldn’t him trying to NOT be in pain be the biggest challenge? Like, the whole yoga thing.. he never did it until he had to. He prolly hated any kind of relaxing meditative stretches precisely because they were the antithesis of his comfort zone. What attitudes am I enlarging, thinking it’s me pushing myself, that are just more of my own personality - what attitudes are totally the opposite of my comfort zone?

Was/is Goggins pursuing virtue?

Does his book reveal anything specific to masculinity that will benefit a wife, mother, or daughter that we can’t find in another book written more engagingly?

(I’m keeping track of the books you guys are recommending. Thank you!)

 

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[ilidek]

Having done some similar challenges (not even 1/10th of the difficulty of what David does, though), I can't agree with that. I remember very well most, if not all, of the most challenging (voluntarily) moments in my life.

The benefits are lifelong. They helped me develop a lot of self-confidence. Little stuff doesn't matter that much anymore. I'm more relaxed and resilient because a bad moment in my life probably doesn't suck as much as a truly bad moment when I was pushing my limits. Voluntary discomfort toughens you up and makes everyday life much easier.

MJ doesn't write anything about NOT pushing your limits, he doesn't write that you shouldn't push yourself physically as well. He just point out other areas worth exploring.

You did improve your self confidence by working on your body. So did I. I started with benchpressing only bar and pretending that I was warming up becuase even 5kg added was too much. At peak time at the gym I did bench press 100kg (220 pounds) (just to test myself because I prefered other exercises) and ended up at calinesthics where I am curently doing like quater handstand pushups. Did I gave up my social life for that? No. Did I gave up my health for that? No. It took me 8 years of working out to start seeing changes in my shoulders but it gave me confidenca way ealier. Meditating daily for 20min+ for a year also gave me better confidence. After 660 days of daily meditation and now a bit more than full year of daily meditation it also boost my confidence, showing me that I am one stubborn / persistent mofo (whatever you want to call it).

You gain healthy confidence by pushing yourself with your goals and staying consistent. You DO NOT have to sacrefice health, relationships and wealth along the way and I think this was MJ message, rather than "don't push yourself physically".

It's also worth mentioning that it's worth more to work on your income than keep pushing yourself. I know that I would be way more wealthy if rather than turning my weakness into my strength I would just focus on earning money and focusing on my strength. I am well aware that it's ego driven. I was fighting it for last 4-5 years, this year I am going to try accept it and see how it works. Like the stupidiest thing I did was banning myself from reading books, I did not use time for not reading books on working, I used it to troll on forums, read 9gag and other sites like that. Even if you push yourself all the time, it's worth at least to be aware where you should go and what you should push rather than just pushing yourself. Just some food for thoughts

 

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[luniac]

well to be fair to goggins,
1) He mentions several times to not do what he did, to not go that extreme, but to find your own challenges.
All the lessons at the end of each chapter are toned down versions of what goggins himself does.

2) He stated his regret regarding some of his interpersonal behavior when he was the training leader in the navy and alienated a lot of people by pushing them to the same standard he followed.
In one interview he says that he understands now that every individual has their own goals and doesn't necessarily wanna be hardcore like goggins.
He admits to being very introverted and even having to pump himself up to do the interviews.

3) The dude is unscripted because he found his happiness. In several interviews he says that through his challenges and overcoming them, as superficial as they may seem, he's truly happy.
And as MTF mentioned, i think he raised well over a million dollars for the Special Operations Warrior Foundation.

4) Ever since discovering yoga, his health has been solid. He said in interviews that he stretches 2 hours a day every day.

5) You keep writing more books MJ, how different is it really from Goggins running another marathon. Different worlds different goals.
What's wrong with moving a goal post after your scored the goal?
Goggins is an athlete at heart, and there's been many cases of elite athletes falling into depression after accomplishing their goal like winning gold medal at the olympics, or becoming boxing heavyweight champ of the world.

6)While i agree it was pretty foolish of him to take on that marathon unprepared, he DID learn from it, and prepared better afterwards.
Also, didn't he run his first marathon before smartphones even existed and on extremely short notice because he had to qualify for the BadWater race.
So he didn't have the time to properly research how brutal marathons really are, and he obviously underestimated what it would be like.

In his future marathons, Goggins made sure to have his mother and wife at the time to be his support team.
He improved his running form based on the star runner he saw at the Hawaii race.
For the BadWater itself, he drove out there before the race to map out the whole path!
He marked down where to have water stations for him to re hydrate, and made mental notes where the toughest parts of the race would be.
He clearly says in the book that planning and preparation is important.

He tried to plan for the pullup record and after failing the first time, he made a lot of changes to improve his chances cause he learned from his experience.

The assertions some of the reviews here make that he repeatedly goes into brutal challenges completely unprepared is false.


EDIT:
i also think its worth mentioning that David did his marathons while holding down a full time job at the Navy Recruitment Office.
In the book he talks about being hired by 4 star general to improve minority enrollment in the Navy Seals program, and David successfully did his job.
So there's even less reason to hate on him, considering he did his job and in his free time raised money for the foundation.
A great man all around.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Unfortunately sometimes nothing helps except for a traumatic event that shifts your priorities.

That won't happen for David. He's already been in the hospital with multiple problems. Only death will be the traumatic event that stops him from his personal self-destruction, a self-destruction that comes complete with an army of devoted fans aspiring to be just as stupid as him.

Reminds me of someone in my life...

After multiple heart attacks, multiple surgeries, and a pill case filled with prescription meds, what traumatic event will finally cause him to change his diet from cheeseburgers, fries, pizza, and ice cream? What event? Stroke? Another heart attack?

Answer?

There is no event that will cause a breakthrough, other than the event where there is no return: death.

A premature death is the only probable outcome for people like this. They're beyond behavior change.

 

[biophase]

While admittedly I did not read it, it seems to me this book doesn't have anything unique - no takeaways that you can't get anywhere else.

Here’s what I don’t get about book reviews. It’s not the author’s fault if you’ve read books of similar things in the past.

If you pick up a real estate book and it’s your 50th rei book, it’s going to probably be repetitive. But if it’s abother guy’s 2nd book it may have some good info for him. This doesn’t change the quality of the content in the book.

I don’t use my current level of knowledge to judge a book, else all those dr Seuss books are getting zero stars from me!

 

[MTF]

My joints, tendons and other soft tissue could not handle the load. (I have a small frame) so I ended up on an orthopedic surgeon's table multiple times with multiple surgeries to correct the stress I put them under.

I used to train at the gym performing your typical weightlifting routine with compound exercises because that's what everybody said was effective. It never worked that great for me. I always suffered from little pains after every workout, particularly my back.

When I switched to calisthenics, I immediately noticed a difference. I felt like I was actually doing something healthy for my body, unlike weightlifting which felt like trying to destroy it. It was more fun, I felt more supple, and I stopped having these little pains.

I believe it's much harder to hurt yourself when you're doing bodyweight exercises because it's just a more natural way to train.

This is also what Paul Wade says in Convict Conditioning:

One of the major problems with modern forms of strength and resistance training is the damage they do to the joints. The joints of the body are supported by delicate soft tissues—tendons, fascia, ligaments and bursae—which are simply not evolved to take the pounding of heavy weight-training. Weak areas include the wrists, elbows, knees, lower back, hips, the rhomboid-complex, spine, and neck. The shoulders are particularly susceptible to damage from bodybuilding motions. You’ll be lucky to find anybody who has been lifting weights for a year or more who hasn’t developed some kind of chronic joint pain in one of these areas.

And then later in the book:

This damage is done because bodybuilding motions are largely unnatural. In order to place a great deal of emphasis on the muscles, the body is forced to hoist heavy external loads in motions and at angles not usually found in nature. One side-effect of this punishment is a vast amount of stress on vulnerable joints, joints which are forced to endure this horror repetitively over time. The result is soft tissue tears, tendonitis, arthritis and other maladies. The joints become inflamed and scar tissue or even calcifications begin to build up, making the joints weaker and stiffer. Bodybuilding movements primarily target the muscles, which adapt much faster than the joints; this means that the more muscular and advanced a bodybuilder becomes, the worse the problem gets.

 

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[andviv]

My Rating: 5 stars out of 5 stars

Format: Audible

My thoughts/review:
I loved the way he described his hacking of his mindset. I have personally his that "wall" many times and hear to the voice of reason saying "nope, this is it, this is your limit" but, listening to his story, I can understand better the need to overcome this alert system and just move forward and push beyond my comfort zone.

Favorite (or least favorite) chapter:
The chapter about the mental governor and what controls our "need" to stop as a precaution to avoid the pain. The 40% rule was fascinating and a great way for me to understand that this is a fake limitation and that we can do way more than what we tell ourselves.

Main takeaway:
My potential is way beyond what my self imposed limitations dictate.

 

[million$$$smile]

I really liked it.

I didn't read it to gain wisdom on personal growth, nor how to develop a new killer mindset. I read it more as an autobiography of his life, and what he did to overcome some extremely dysfunctional circumstances in his early years.

I would have to agree that it sounds like he might be totally lacking in the personal relationship department, but who wouldn't be if they grew up in a similar situation. He had absolutely no control in his youth, so he grew up trying to control his mental and physical body. His focus on that particular aspect seems like he never learned what entails relationship, basically because there were no sustaining foundation of a loving relationship in his early life. I mean, read about the 100,000 child soldiers of Africa. Would one expect most of these soldiers to ever have sustaining non-dysfunctional relationships in later years?

Goggin's has definitely overcome a lot from where he came from, and most likely has some demons to conquer in other areas of his life. He even mentions on Audible how hard it was for him to pull these memories back up and relive them. Almost anyone that has been abused has a hard time in the relationship department without some counseling.

He has extreme mental toughness that he has learned to develop.
I respect and admire that.
I can understand it might even make some uncomfortable for other reasons already stated, but there are many others that have been high achievers in business also and other areas of their life are in chaos, just look at J. Paul Getty or Howard Hughes or some celebrities, politicians, or priests.

Best Takeaway:
For me it was pretty simple.
When you're ready to quit, just put one foot in front of the other and keep going...

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Where are all the Goggins lovers who voted for this book? Where's your review!? I'm only 50% finished so I hope to have a review shortly.

 

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[Andy Black]

I listened to a minute of the free sample on Audible before turning it off. Skimming the posts here tells me I probably saved myself a few hours.