A Warning for Young Guys: Money is NOT the way to solve your Girl Problems

[Kevin88660]

False.

You ask what I am disagreeing with. It is this.

You are saying a guy has to have looks and/or status and/or money OR THEY HAVE TO LIE (most of the time).





Asking someone what they want is a lot different to seeing what they actually do. That's sales 101.

Case in point...

View attachment 25006


Bottom line is just like you can learn sales and marketing for a business you can learn to sell yourself and improve your product (you).



Ugly guy: "I'm friends with Matt Damon"
Hot girl: "Your place or mine"

Are you being serious?

Any girl is going to laugh out loud at the statements. They show zero social awareness and reak of desperation.

Girls are hard-wired a lot better than men to quickly find out if a guy is legit or not. They are way better at noticing subtle social cues that tell a mans real value. This "hot girls get tricked stuff" is like 0.00001% stuff.

I don't know where you are getting this from but it sounds like something from the 60s or from a dive bar in the back of nowhere.



That is your reality. And that sounds like the actual path of frustration.

There are amazing girls everywhere and only one of me.

I don't need to lie (nor does any man) when he has himself together, lives life on his terms, and goes for what he wants. My value is only rising every day so I see myself as the prize.

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can't – you're right,”

Of course Men lie about wealth and status. Just like women like to put profile pictures taken 6 years ago to look young.

Part of the game is about filtering out the bullshit.

I dont think Max is suggesting that telling lies work very well. The fact that so many people need to make up stories about themselves because intuitively they know money, status and look matter.

Ironically you picked fifty shades of grey as an example. Isn’t it an example of proving girls like handsome, psychopathic billionaires?

You talked about improving the man himself as a product, but the product is really about 65% money and status, 25% looks and 10% other stuffs.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[rollerskates]

There is no such thing as an unattractive man - only a man living unattractively.

YES, YES, YES. And I don't agree just on looks, but say, living in your mom's basement smoking weed and playing video games and never helping out.

Ugly guy: "I'm friends with Matt Damon"
Hot girl: "Your place or mine"

Hahahaha! My friend and I legit had a guy try this on us. His friend was a friend of a VERY BIG NAME celebrity.

Overall, I don't think there's any one particular formula for why girls are attracted. I go for intelligence first, but everyone's different.

 

[Kevin88660]

YES, YES, YES. And I don't agree just on looks, but say, living in your mom's basement smoking weed and playing video games and never helping out.



Hahahaha! My friend and I legit had a guy try this on us. His friend was a friend of a VERY BIG NAME celebrity.

Overall, I don't think there's any one particular formula for why girls are attracted. I go for intelligence first, but everyone's different.

In the 90s and early 2000s it was all about money until the rise of facebooks and instal-gram looks starts to play a bigger picture for men.

I remember how the discussion among the girls changed. It used to be “catching the big fish”, “what car does he drive” and “how much does he make”.

Now it is about “where to find the cute/handsome guy” and “whats his name so that I can check on his facebook and instagram”.

I am not saying look is number one now and I do not think it is. But It used to be all about money and now I cannot really generalize the same way, particularly for those U30 young millennials.

 

[Fox]

Ironically you picked fifty shades of grey as an example. Isn’t it an example of proving girls like handsome, psychopathic billionaires?

My point was about the video he posted being worth zero in real life data.

Asking people on camera what they think they want compared to what they actually do is massive.

That is copywriting and sales day one. The point of that video isn't to be useful - it is to get people talking.

My point with 50 shades of grey is the same. Few people will admit to being interested in reading it on camera.
Yet it sold like pancakes.

I am not denying that being a fictional billionaire jacked handsome guy gives you options.
But this is the extreme ends of the dating pool. It is erotic - hardly a place to get real data.

This would be like saying unless a girl looks like a runway model she would never get a decent guy.


There is a lot of outlier logic in this thread - extreme points being passed off as the everyday norm.

The reality is that if you work on yourself there are a lot of options out there. Most of the population is broke, overweight, and live boring grey lives. It isn't hard to be in the top percent with a little bit of work.

Getting bummed out cause you compare yourself with the top 0.0000000001% of guys on IG or Tinder is not a smart move.

If you want results that others don't get then do what they won't - log off the dating and social apps and put in some real work on improving yourself.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[ApparentHorizon]

I can't remember the source I'm sorry...

I watched an experiment years ago on a documentary. They said something like there are five main genetic "types" and if you are say a number 1, then you will find people in number 5 the most attractive and people in number 1 the least.

This was then proven by using pheromones rubbed on a set of chairs, they didn't tell the participants what the experiment was for, they just told them to go into a room and wait.

After watching dozens of people sit down, they took the genetic profiles and saw that indeed the people did always go for the chair smeared with the pheromones of their genetic opposites....

I guess that covers the two things you mentioned, and it would make evolutionary sense if we could identify our genetic opposites without kissing or having sex first.

There's the 5 types of structural variations, but that doesn't seem related.

What throws me off is the parental figure, since that's 50% of your DNA.

There is no such thing as an unattractive man - only a man living unattractively.

 

[Bekit]

That is copywriting and sales day one.

Speaking of copywriting... I'm kind of amused at this whole thread, seen through the lens of copywriting. Let's assume, like someone said above, that women are the buyers and men are the sellers. Now, the sale begins.

Copywriting 101: Listen to your audience. Reflect their language back to them. Describe their problem back to them in their own words. The more you can enter the conversation that is already going on in the prospect's head, the more the prospect will believe in your offer. Appeal to the emotions, not the intellect. Use stories, not lists of facts.

Sales 101: Focus on benefits, not features. And by "benefits," I mean benefits as the buyer sees them. Know how to read buying signals. Know when to use bonuses, guarantees, and back-pocket offers to get someone off the fence. Oh, and ask for the sale.

OK, now the conversation begins.

Guys on this thread: It's about looks! No, it's about money! No, it's about fitness! No it's about blah blah blah... gonna go catch a girl now!

Girls on this thread: The guys haven't actually listened to what we said... I don't see a match between what they're thinking and what we're thinking... and besides, they don't seem to know when to ask for the sale...

This is a classic case of ships passing in the night. How likely is a sale?

Side note: At least the title of this thread is true. All we need for proof of that is Biophase's Gold Digger thread (on the inside).

 

[Seamster]

Most guys who take how-to-get-girls seminars just need a few drinks and a push from friends to talk to girls.

The secret is not really looks - you can't be fat and sloppy, but a T-shirt and flip-flops is enough to pick up a girl; and enough to take her home after your first date. No, the secret is TIME to hit on many girls. Any guy can get any [type of] girl if he talks to enough of them. So, you can successfully ignore any advice about women and simply go talk to enough of them and follow a simple process. The work you must put in, however, is a 10 or 20 hour per week job. I mean, how many HOT girls do you even see? An average looking guy would need to talk to between 20 and 100 of them to get sex with one, depending on skill.

About money = women, well, in some cases, yeah, a Ferarri will get you laid. But a poor guy with a lot of time to talk to more women will also get him laid. There are a lot different types of women.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Primeperiwinkle]

I devoted my 20s to picking up women. I left the country and created a working system. My code name was known online and a lot guys followed my advice. Guys would want to pay me to give them a "seminar," but I wasn't interested in money or wasting my time. Most of those guys just needed a few drinks and a push from friends to talk to girls anyway.

I came back to the States because I couldn't meet my goal. I didn't want one objectively "hot" girl a week, I wanted one SUPER HOT one once a month. And yes, it was sex I wanted. (In case if you're wondering, I never dumped any girls. They would rarely want to see me once I told them I liked them. I'm kind of OCD and philisophical and exhausting to talk to anyway, so they had their reasons I'm sure).

So, the secret to this game was not really looks - you can't be fat and sloppy, but a T-shirt and flip-flops is enough to pick up a girl; and enough to take her home after your first date. No, the secret to my goal is TIME. It's a damn numbers game! Any guy can get any [type of] girl if he talks to enough of them. So, you can successully ignore any advice about women and simply go talk to enough of them and follow a simple process. The work you must put in, however, is a 10 or 20 hour per week job. I mean, how many HOT girls do you even see? (thus me moving to a big city to have a large enough pool to see one per hour, let's say). An average looking guy would need to talk to between 20 and 100 of them to get sex with one, depending on skill.

In the 8 months proceeding me coming back to the States, I did succeed with the one-a-month goal. However, that meant several hours a week talking to girls in addition to working my job. I left to come back and try to create passive income so I could travel and have more time to pick up women. This is all what let me to certain countries, starting certain [failing] businesses, etc.

....that was the past me. Current me has a "good" office job and a changed brain due to reading the 100s of business books I bought. I still want to travel and find a nice girl but the goal has changed a lot. I want to not work a 9-5 job. That's the goal. I don't want a Lambo or a big house or even a wife or kids. Give me free time and a small cabin and what I do with that free time will be the next chapter.

About money = women, well, in some cases, yeah, a Ferarri will get you laid. But a poor guy with a lot of time to talk to more women will also get him laid. There are a lot different types of women out there.

Action Taker.^^
It really is this simple.

 

[Bearcorp]

Guys on this thread: It's about looks! No, it's about money! No, it's about fitness! No it's about blah blah blah... gonna go catch a girl now!

Girls on this thread: The guys haven't actually listened to what we said... I don't see a match between what they're thinking and what we're thinking... and besides, they don't seem to know when to ask for the sale...

So single men should listen rather than know everything? Seems like an unusual approach

 

[Maxboost]

All “ugly” guys have to lie to get a hot girl?

No I never said that, but many do. Why do I have to keep repeating this? You have to have at least 1 of the 3, looks, money and status.

THEY HAVE TO LIE (most of the time).

Many do. With 6 billion people of course there are going to be outliers which is not the norm.

You are saying a guy has to have looks and/or status and/or money OR THEY HAVE TO LIE (most of the time).

Again, many ugly guys who are good with women turned out to be complete liars. I NEVER advocated lying but rather an explanation when there is a disparity in looks and SMV. Sure there are outliers but it is not the norm.

If you are broke, no friends, and ugly you can still land a girlfriend but she will be below your SMV as girls will only date up.

If you are missing all 3 key characteristics, looks, money and status, you are going to have a hard time finding a girl above your market value. (do you agree with this statement?)

Do you honestly beleive that a short, bald, fat, guy with no job or friends can land a model like girlfriend but more importantly keep her? You don't think this same model type girl would not have options? Is this the norm in your world view?

The few times that I've seen this happen was because these same guys just lied their asses off. The ugly guys who do land that trophy wife are usually well off financially or have their own company.

Bottom line is just like you can learn sales and marketing for a business you can learn to sell yourself and improve your product (you).

I never said you should never improve yourself. In fact I said the opposite in a previous post. Maxing out your looks is a no brainer. Dressing well and being in shape, doing cool stuff should be mandatory.

In sales, there are many deceptive sales people just like in dating. When I used to work at a telemarketing company, the top sales guy got fired for lying on the phone all the time while I thought he was this expert salesman.

Ugly guy: "I'm friends with Matt Damon"
Hot girl: "Your place or mine"

Are you being serious?

Yes, this happens as I have known C level celebrities from TV personalities and athletes and this especially works with roadies and body guards working with well known bands. Why is this so hard to believe? You never heard of a "groupie" girls before?

I've personally met plenty of bouncers who worked at the hottest nightclub in the city get sexual favours from very attractive girls to get into the VIP to meet the celebrity.

Getting sexual favours to access your personal network of friends is not uncommon and happens more often than you realize. The ugly guys that I have met knew this and exploited this by "exaggerating" the truth of their network.

You should understand this as you know the power of networking...As sad as it turns out the rumored Hollywood casting couch was indeed true with Harvey Weinstein being a major creep.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Maxboost]

What a good diet, fitness plan, and a bit of style can do for a guy...

View attachment 25010


The reality is there is a lot both sexes can do to maximise themselves but few do.

Arguing about "averages" is a great excuse to get nowhere. Work on yourself and you will see results.

1. There is no excuse to be fat, out of shape, and out of style
2. Have a life that she wants to be a part of, do cool shit like travel, spontaneous trips/dates and ideas

I agree and this is what I advocate. You are misinterpreting what I am saying but at the same time agreeing what I am saying.

 

[guy93777]

I devoted my 20s to picking up women. I left the country and created a working system. My code name was known online and a lot guys followed my advice. Guys would want to pay me to give them a "seminar," but I wasn't interested in money or wasting my time. Most of those guys just needed a few drinks and a push from friends to talk to girls anyway.

I came back to the States because I couldn't meet my goal. I didn't want one objectively "hot" girl a week, I wanted one SUPER HOT one once a month. And yes, it was sex I wanted. (In case if you're wondering, I never dumped any girls. They would rarely want to see me once I told them I liked them. I'm kind of OCD and philisophical and exhausting to talk to anyway, so they had their reasons I'm sure).

So, the secret to this game was not really looks - you can't be fat and sloppy, but a T-shirt and flip-flops is enough to pick up a girl; and enough to take her home after your first date. No, the secret to my goal is TIME. It's a damn numbers game! Any guy can get any [type of] girl if he talks to enough of them. So, you can successully ignore any advice about women and simply go talk to enough of them and follow a simple process. The work you must put in, however, is a 10 or 20 hour per week job. I mean, how many HOT girls do you even see? (thus me moving to a big city to have a large enough pool to see one per hour, let's say). An average looking guy would need to talk to between 20 and 100 of them to get sex with one, depending on skill.

In the 8 months proceeding me coming back to the States, I did succeed with the one-a-month goal. However, that meant several hours a week talking to girls in addition to working my job. I left to come back and try to create passive income so I could travel and have more time to pick up women. This is all what let me to certain countries, starting certain [failing] businesses, etc.

....that was the past me. Current me has a "good" office job and a changed brain due to reading the 100s of business books I bought. I still want to travel and find a nice girl but the goal has changed a lot. I want to not work a 9-5 job. That's the goal. I don't want a Lambo or a big house or even a wife or kids. Give me free time and a small cabin and what I do with that free time will be the next chapter.

About money = women, well, in some cases, yeah, a Ferarri will get you laid. But a poor guy with a lot of time to talk to more women will also get him laid. There are a lot different types of women out there.

yes it is a numbers game in countries like the USA.

but i doubt this is the case in china ou india because there isn't enough women

Why millions of Chinese men are staying single

The gender gap is a big problem in the Middle Kingdom – and its ‘leftover men’ are going to great lengths to find a wife

www.bbc.com

quote :

"By 2020, it’s estimated there will be 30 million more men than women looking for a partner"

how do you get laid ? you don't

 

[Maxboost]

Of course Men lie about wealth and status. Just like women like to put profile pictures taken 6 years ago to look young.

Part of the game is about filtering out the bullshit.

I dont think Max is suggesting that telling lies work very well. The fact that so many people need to make up stories about themselves because intuitively they know money, status and look matter.

Ironically you picked fifty shades of grey as an example. Isn’t it an example of proving girls like handsome, psychopathic billionaires?

You talked about improving the man himself as a product, but the product is really about 65% money and status, 25% looks and 10% other stuffs.

Exactly, @Fox is assuming that I am telling the guys on this forum to LIE to get women if you are not good looking or rich. That is not true.

Maximizing your looks, getting cool hobbies and building a big social network will ALWAYS make you attractive. Having an amazing life that she wants to be a part of will infinitely make you more attractive.

On the other hand, many ugly guys that I have met just flat out lied to get with women who are above their league.

What is so controversial about that?

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Maxboost]

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mAIcM-XaTFM


I know @MJ DeMarco is good friends of John at bulldog mindset. Good interview with Rollo.

The rationale male, and no mr niceguy should be mandatory reading if you want another perspective about dating.

 

[Kevin88660]

yes it is a numbers game in countries like the USA.

but i doubt this is the case in china ou india because there isn't enough women

Why millions of Chinese men are staying single

The gender gap is a big problem in the Middle Kingdom – and its ‘leftover men’ are going to great lengths to find a wife

www.bbc.com

quote :


how do you get laid ? you don't

The pain of the gender imbalance is mainly felt in the poorer rural areas because the poorer rural women will flock to market men in the city. So it doesnt feel like there is gender imbalance unless you are a vulnerable group- migrant male worker from rural areas working in a city.

 

[Fox]

No I never said that, but many do. Why do I have to keep repeating this? You have to have at least 1 of the 3, looks, money and status.



Many do. With 6 billion people of course there are going to be outliers which is not the norm.



Again, many ugly guys who are good with women turned out to be complete liars. I NEVER advocated lying but rather an explanation when there is a disparity in looks and SMV. Sure there are outliers but it is not the norm.

If you are broke, no friends, and ugly you can still land a girlfriend but she will be below your SMV as girls will only date up.

If you are missing all 3 key characteristics, looks, money and status, you are going to have a hard time finding a girl above your market value. (do you agree with this statement?)

Do you honestly beleive that a short, bald, fat, guy with no job or friends can land a model like girlfriend but more importantly keep her? You don't think this same model type girl would not have options? Is this the norm in your world view?

The few times that I've seen this happen was because these same guys just lied their asses off. The ugly guys who do land that trophy wife are usually well off financially or have their own company.





I never said you should never improve yourself. In fact I said the opposite in a previous post. Maxing out your looks is a no brainer. Dressing well and being in shape, doing cool stuff should be mandatory.

In sales, there are many deceptive sales people just like in dating. When I used to work at a telemarketing company, the top sales guy got fired for lying on the phone all the time while I thought he was this expert salesman.



Yes, this happens as I have known C level celebrities from TV personalities and athletes and this especially works with roadies and body guards working with well known bands. Why is this so hard to believe? You never heard of a "groupie" girls before?

I've personally met plenty of bouncers who worked at the hottest nightclub in the city get sexual favours from very attractive girls to get into the VIP to meet the celebrity.

Getting sexual favours to access your personal network of friends is not uncommon and happens more often than you realize. The ugly guys that I have met knew this and exploited this by "exaggerating" the truth of their network.

You should understand this as you know the power of networking...As sad as it turns out the rumored Hollywood casting couch was indeed true with Harvey Weinstein being a major creep.

Last post on this cause everything I am saying is going over your head.

I don’t think you’re promoting what you’re saying - I just think what you’re saying is mostly false. You don’t have enough real data and/or you’re not taking a general look at the whole dating market place.

You’re using personal and/or extreme stories to form your ideas :
- your lying friends
- your buddy the bouncer
- this one guy who lied when selling at a place you used to work
- Harvey Weinstein

Given your sources do you really thing that’s a fair sample group to draw meaningful advice for members on here? You’re observing grimy nightlife somewhere and calling that as the norm for everywhere.

It’s like you saying “most businesses lie to make sales” and then you say you’re basing your data on your buddy who worked at Enron. Basically your sources suck so your conclusions are all wrong.

You’re looking at most “ugly” guys who succeed with girls and thinking - he is probably lying.

I look at the same dude and think “good for him - he probably has something cool going on in his life or is an interesting guy”.

Your quotes say more about who you are getting this info from than anything else... “Getting sexual favours to access your personal network of friends is not uncommon and happens more often than you realize. The ugly guys that I have met knew this and exploited this by "exaggerating" the truth of their network.”

Get better friends dude and go hang out somewhere less toxic. People who aren’t scumbags so you have a more positive view of the world. What you are saying is right but it only applies in a tiny group of society. West Hollywood nightlife isn’t how the most of the world works lol.

To wrap this up...

Your picking human nature at its worse and thinking this is how it is for everyone.

Why I’ve been correcting it is that it’s an extremely negative viewpoint that isn’t going to help someone on here who could be doing a lot to improve themselves. You don’t even know you’re doing this cause you think all these grimy people you have met give you an accurate picture of everyone else. They don’t.

Find better friends.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[AgainstAllOdds]

@Fox - I want to +rep, but don't know how with this new forum. Thanks for the posts.

As for the rest of this thread, it sucks including my original post. I regret making a half-assed post that spiraled the conversation into what the last 7 pages have been. Just wanted to make the point that money won't solve your girl problems and that there's obvious better methods - never meant for the conversation to devolve into what it currently is.

 

[Roli]

You’re using personal and/or extreme stories to form your ideas :
- your lying friends
- your buddy the bouncer
- this one guy who lied when selling at a place you used to work
- Harvey Weinstein

Given your sources do you really thing that’s a fair sample group to draw meaningful advice for members on here?

^^^
You could have dropped the mic right there and just sauntered off stage.

 

[Monica Rose]

Everyone has different values, or at least different emphasis placed on certain values. Figure out what you value the most and look for someone that shares those values. If you're really into physical fitness, look for someone that is at least somewhat into it and will support your lifestyle of clean eating and training. If you're an entrepreneur or want to be, find out how your significan other feels about taking risks, having unreliable income etc... Dating is a crapshoot and sometimes it takes a bit of time to get to know someone enough but don't settle down with someone who doesn't share your values, especially when it comes to your money mindset. If you speak a different money language then your partner, you can still make it work but it will take extra effort and compromise to find a happy middle ground. Take the time in new relationships to talk, a lot, about what you want out of life. Cant emphasize enough the importance of deep conversations.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Xeon]

What a good diet, fitness plan, and a bit of style can do for a guy...

View attachment 25010

As any ectomorph will tell you, losing weight like the above guy is far easier than going from skinny fug to buff dude in 4 months. Let's not kid ourselves, a lot of these transformations are not even real.
1 year? Ok, I'll believe that assuming there's good diet and extremely good training, *assuming* the guy is doing all the right things.

4 months?

 

[Fox]

As any ectomorph will tell you, losing weight like the above guy is far easier than going from skinny fug to buff dude in 4 months. Let's not kid ourselves, a lot of these transformations are not even real.
1 year? Ok, I'll believe that assuming there's good diet and extremely good training, *assuming* the guy is doing all the right things.

4 months?

So in one year from now neither you nor I have any excuse not to be in great shape.

I’ll make that deal.




If you want to join me I am starting a somewhat fitness (but mainly discipline) challenge over in this thread.

In one year from now, you could have made massive progress and documented it here on the forum to inspire others. You in?

 

[StrikingViper69]

So in one year from now neither you nor I have any excuse not to be in great shape.

This is the important take away from the discussion.

The details of how fast a change can be made don't matter, the important thing is that we all have the ability to take ourselves from A to B if we choose to.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Rawr]

@Fox - I want to +rep, but don't know how with this new forum. Thanks for the posts.

As for the rest of this thread, it sucks including my original post. I regret making a half-assed post that spiraled the conversation into what the last 7 pages have been. Just wanted to make the point that money won't solve your girl problems and that there's obvious better methods - never meant for the conversation to devolve into what it currently is.

at least you see you were making bad posts. I suggest less pot and less thinking when you post. Im not hating I knew who you were when you joined as Im also like that sometime, but this forum should be a bastion for WHAT IS, not for fuzziness.

MJ had a great post on the first page that is the right idea - different things differ to different women. It is a crazy idea to brainwashed guys myself included until I learned my gf HATED that i had muscles, she loved skinny pale guys in skinny jeans. Now what!?

Some women want this, some that, depending what they have, what they wish they had, etc etc

 

[ygtrhos]

I think I have a say regarding this.

I had never seduced a chick when I was 22 years old. Now I just turned 30 and I had about 100 women, 2 relationships and tons of experience in different contexts.

Now dressing and having a killer body is fine. But it is no way the most dominant factor. NO WAY.

If you have a killer body, take care of yourself and look awesome, people will still sense that you do it to appeal to them, if you do it for the chicks. That is neediness. WHY you do is way more important than WHAT you do.

Now that for one, also that Muay Thai guy has the freedom to bang chicks does not mean he would actually bang another chick every day. You have to look broader.

What is it worth, if you are the biggest Casanova but not happy?

"The ultimate ROI is happiness" says Garyvee. Not lay counts. Not how much your friends admire your gf. Not your net worth.

The problem in this thread is the definition of the problem. There is no general "girl problem" really. Total bullshit. Some dude wants a virgin girl to marry and have 5 kids. The other one wants to bang fitness chicks every second week and never commit.

So define your "girl problem" to solve it, because it defines your strategy after all.

What is important for you currently? You want to have more sexual experience? You want to have variety? You want to have depth? Commitment? What is it that you want from dating?

If you want depth and love, while banging one after the other, you will be very disappointed.

Let's say you want depth, love and commitment (which is in my opinion the end goal of 90% of men).

Because the number of nights I spent alone without cuddling and making pillow talk was 10x more than 15-20 times wild sex that I had yearly. It did not make me feel good. I had a lot of low days with a few high days in between.

Even that Muay Thai guy does not want to go out 3-4 days and party all night to keep those abs like that. Life is more than momentary pleasure and having more orgasms.

The next question is: What do you value in life? Because it will define the women you will like.

My first girlfriend was a small town chick, who had flight anxiety and could not even take a 1 hour train to my city. I had backpacking trips to Asia for 2-3 months, surfing from one hostel to the other. Her dream was to have 3-4 kids, I hate kids to this day. I was reading TMF and she is still making a degree to get a slowlane job. I wanted to have an open relationship and she did not.

Obviously, we were not good matches.

What you value in life determines what you value in a woman.

My current girlfriend is sexually open, loves traveling and hugely into intimacy. She has a life, her own passions and friends circle. She is also very caring. These things are results of my experiments with women about what I like and what I do not. I have become so cunningly selective. And it is making an awesome job in delivering me happiness since I met her.

It is all about how much you like your life, have the courage to be authentic to yourself and take action. Chicks see this. They see that you can make yourself content and that calm contentness makes you care a lot less about what others think. That contentness, that non-reactiveness creates a sense of authority in you, which allows you to dominate every interaction.

Now you know what you want from dating and what kind of woman you want. Now you gotta figure out, where to find that woman.

I spend probably more time than each of you chasing girls. I went to clubs all the time. Or Tinder. I did not know what I wanted from a girl. I wanted all: excitement, variety, commitment and depth. All conflicting goals and all without a plan.

Now that I know a lot of things about myself and my values (intellectuality, curiosity, authenticity, openness, intimacy etc.) I know what to do.

I stopped going to clubs, because most of the girls there are not intellectual and they want to hunt down attention. I wrote my profile texts in online dating (even in Tinder and the swinger network I was registered in) to filter a committing partner. I joined volleyball teams, because I love the game and wanted to enter a "seemingly normal" social context.

Now while doing this, I did 4-5 photoshootings in my classic fashion wear, in which I look awesome. I kept at my top physical level. But I also knew what I wanted very clearly and expressed it with my attitude and online dating profile as well.

I met my current partner on that goddamn swinger network. Yes, exactly where you do not expect to find a normal girl, I found an amazing one. If not, I would probably go to meditation classes, language classes or entrepreneur meetups, where I meet the type of people (and women) I wish to meet.

Now every second week, I get a message (yes, girls send messages on online dating) from a chick that says how exciting my profile is and that they want to know more about me.

Because of the fact that I polarize the chicks I want really hard.

If I wanted to hook up more, I would have visited those swinger parties way more. Because I hate gyms. I do not like to do sports on my own and I also do not want to focus on this right now in my life.

I wanted a gf. I defined my "girl problem". I was honest and open about it. I knew what was essential, and I went for it. I cannot be happier now. All I want is to collect memories with her and keep her around.

She also does not restrict me, I can still hook up with other chicks. But who cares? She already gives me a lot.

Maybe this will change. Maybe I will change. Then I will define my "girl problem" again and go for it again.

Hope I could help someone reading this.

 

[Xeon]

So in one year from now neither you nor I have any excuse not to be in great shape.

I’ll make that deal.

View attachment 25021


If you want to join me I am starting a somewhat fitness (but mainly discipline) challenge over in this thread.

In one year from now, you could have made massive progress and documented it here on the forum to inspire others. You in?

Have to turn that down. I don't believe in these challenges (including the #icebucketchallenge).
I'm an ectomorph and I'm happy with my present gains after 2 yrs, not 4 months.

Good luck with the challenge.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Oilman]

I once had a friend who did a test profile on some dating apps, and in the profile, he put nothing but photos of himself in the usual "high-end" / romantic places (Paris! Make sure the Eiffel tower is in the background), Iceland (northern lights), some European cafe, Italy (this IS the big one) and others.
Turns out, girls were contacting him like no other.

Everybody can go do whatever they want but as for me I want to be able to enjoy women to an extent. By that I don't mean I want to be a player for years on end and one day I want to settle down. Like I said in my post there are plenty of rich people or even comfortably well off people that have the personalities of a rock. Women, especially hot ones, don't want to be bored. I think everybody here can vouch it isn't easy to switch from work mode to social mode.

What Xeon said is pretty similar to what I plan on doing once I can get my finances hammered down. Using a dating app to test the waters is smart and see where you stand. Me personally I have 2 great pictures of me on Tinder but I need just two more before I hit that point where I have too many women to deal with.

Bottom line is dating and career are those things where once you get it you look back and laugh at how you fretted over that one client or that one girl. In my case I spent too much money on useless "consulting" by people that didn't know what they were talking about. Once you make it you made it.

 

[The Abundant Man]

First comes love
Second comes marriage
Third comes a baby in a carriage

Gotta have some love. Love will solve all your girl problems.

 

[The Abundant Man]

On the other hand, many ugly guys that I have met just flat out lied to get with women who are above their league.

What is so controversial about that?

Here's a story:

Roy was a nice guy all throught college. He was a geeky science guy., but adored by all the girls he hung out with. Roy adored them as well but in a sexual way. Unfortunately, whenever Roy worked up the nerve to say something. they told him they just wanted to be friends. All the while Roy would sit there listening to his female firends complain about their horrible boyfriends. All Roy could think was "But I care about you, I'm sensitive, and I'm right in front of you. Why can't you see that?"

Needless to say, Roy's female friends never came around. Despite all of the waiting and hoping, they always moved on to the next guy.

Eventually, he landed his first girlfriend; a depressive, overweight grad student who worked in his lab. Despite her shortcomings, he was smitten with her. But his girlfrend's instability got the best of them so they broke up.

Roy's anger boiled over. He was sick of being walked over. He was sick of being ignored and hurt. Roy decided he had enough(of these snakes on this plane), it was time to put himself first. He had seen how other men had been assholes to women and slept with them. So he did the same.

Roy became comfortable dishing insults and teases to women he talked to. Some women were offended but strangely this made Roy feel even more powerful.

To Roy's suprise some of these women became attracted to him. He took the home and slept with them.

Some of the girls were genuinely intrigued by Roy. Roy would toy with these women, play phone tag, use theme for sex and then invent some sort of conflict or blame for something she didn't do as an excuse to not see her ever again. These women got the picture that Roy was not stable so they moved on.

Other girls just wanted male validation and emotional desperation.

But for many others, their neediness was deeper than that. These women desperately craved emotional and sexual validation. They would launch into crying fits, call Roy dozens of times or show up at his apartment unannounced. Dramatic episodes would go on for months at a time of angry break up and loving reunion over and over again. Many of these women had experienced abuse in the past. Eventually Roy would tire of their games and break things off, swearing to never let himself succumb to them like that again. But often the next "crazy" girl would be around the corner. "-Models: Attract Women Through Honesty by Mark Manson

Assortment Principle-people with the same principles, beliefs and values attract one another(Hence why we're all on this forum

If you attract certain people, it's a reflection on you.

If these ugly men lie to women, I'm pretty sure these women are doing the same thing or they're seeking something else.

Quality>beautiful/hotness

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[ACB]

disagree

 

[DeletedUser0287]

What a good diet, fitness plan, and a bit of style can do for a guy...

View attachment 25010


The reality is there is a lot both sexes can do to maximise themselves but few do.

Arguing about "averages" is a great excuse to get nowhere. Work on yourself and you will see results.

I am not sure why you chose Chris Pratt as an example of this. Chris Pratt's highest value skew is his status. He is a celebrity. I remembered long ago that his previous wife stated that she preferred the "chubby" version of him. I mean the right picture will be more attractive to most women. Just keep in mind that Chris's value skew is mostly status based, but you are using this image to show physical attribute maxing.

EDIT: What I am saying is that even fat Chris Pratt will get more women that the average fit guy. Looks are only a micro variable to most women. Status is a macro variable