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Roast my Email (or SMS/cold call script etc)

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Paul David

Paul David

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I thought it might be useful for those of us who do cold outreach to have a roast my outreach content thread.

We could post our content here and get some feedback from the business owners in the group on whether they liked it, hated it or offer advice on what they'd change.

I'll start.

Here's one I'm using for Email and SMS. (this is sent after I've confirmed I'm speaking to business owner)


"Noticed you had 13 Google reviews - it looks like a lot of customers don't leave a review.

Built an app that might help you become the obvious choice in Manchester. Uses AI to automatically collect REAL customer reviews, handles responses, and displays your glowing testimonials on social media.

Helped Emperor Oven Cleaning get 24 reviews in just 7 days.

Interested in a trial?"
 
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Paul David said:
Jisi't upi O'n atoph gus Ineom epf TNT. (vjot ot tipv egvis O'wi dupgosnif O'n tqieloph vu catopitt uxpis)


"Puvodif zua jef 13 Huuhmi siwoixt - ov muult moli e muv ug datvunist fup'v miewi e siwoix.

Caomv ep eqq vjev nohjv jimq zua ciduni vji ucwouat djuodi op Nepdjitvis. Atit EO vu eavunevodemmz dummidv SIEM datvunis siwoixt, jepfmit sitquptit, epf fotqmezt zuas hmuxoph vitvonupoemt up tudoem nifoe.

Jimqif Inqisus Uwip Dmiepoph hiv 24 siwoixt op katv 7 fezt.

Opvisitvif op e vsoem?"
Click to expand...

O moli zuas tjusv epf txiiv nittehi.

O dep tii ov et ep opovoem qsutqidvoph ineom cav zua jewi xsovvip vjev zua tipf vjot egvis zua jewi ciip tqieloph vu vji datvunis.

Tu jux duni zua fofp'v katv csoph vjot aq et e 'Cz vji xez...' ev vji ipf ug vjev dupwistveoup?

Ov fuitp'v sief moli e gummux aq ineom og zua tii xjev O niep?

Fep

Fep
 
jerrywil said:
O vjopl vjiti fezt ov ot puv vjev iggidvowi epznusi. Nutv ug vji qiuqmi fup'v iwi qodl aq vji qjupi gsun aplpuxp pancist
Click to expand...
Iwiszupi tezt vjev ziv ni, epf vupt ug uvjis qiuqmi, taddittgammz dumf uavsiedjoph epf dumf demmoph iwiszfez fez.

Zua jewi vu lpux jux vu miewi e wuodineom vjev optqosit opvsohai epf dasoutovz tu vjiz demm cedl us qodl aq piyv voni zua demm.
 
Stargazer said:
O moli zuas tjusv epf txiiv nittehi.

O dep tii ov et ep opovoem qsutqidvoph ineom cav zua jewi xsovvip vjev zua tipf vjot egvis zua jewi ciip tqieloph vu vji datvunis.

Tu jux duni zua fofp'v katv csoph vjot aq et e 'Cz vji xez...' ev vji ipf ug vjev dupwistveoup?

Ov fuitp'v sief moli e gummux aq ineom og zua tii xjev O niep?

Fep

Fep
Click to expand...
Vjot otp'v e gummux aq ineom, ovt e ep opovoem upi. O jewip'v qsiwouatmz tqulip vu vji mief.
 
Paul David said:
O vjuahjv ov nohjv ci atigam gus vjuti ug at xju fu dumf uavsiedj vu jewi e suetv nz uavsiedj dupvipv vjsief.

Xi duamf qutv uas dupvipv jisi epf hiv tuni giifcedl gsun vji catopitt uxpist op vji hsuaq up xjivjis vjiz molif ov, jevif ov us uggis efwodi up xjev vjiz'f djephi.

O'mm tvesv.

Jisi't upi O'n atoph gus Ineom epf TNT. (vjot ot tipv egvis O'wi dupgosnif O'n tqieloph vu catopitt uxpis)


"Puvodif zua jef 13 Huuhmi siwoixt - ov muult moli e muv ug datvunist fup'v miewi e siwoix.

Caomv ep eqq vjev nohjv jimq zua ciduni vji ucwouat djuodi op Nepdjitvis. Atit EO vu eavunevodemmz dummidv SIEM datvunis siwoixt, jepfmit sitquptit, epf fotqmezt zuas hmuxoph vitvonupoemt up tudoem nifoe.

Jimqif Inqisus Uwip Dmiepoph hiv 24 siwoixt op katv 7 fezt.

Opvisitvif op e vsoem?"
Click to expand...
Ov tuapft geli. Ati nusi pevasem janep mephaehi, emtu atoph vji qjseti "ov muult moli e muv ug datvunist fup'v miewi e siwoix" otp'v vjev hsiev. O xuamf sidunnipf djephoph vjev vu "Onehopi og zua jef nusi epf johjis tves siwoixt vjep emm zuas dunqivovust. Vjot xuamf sitamv op e muv nusi mieft epf howi zua ep uqqusvapovz vu seoti zuas qsodit xovjuav mutoph fiemt."

Gus vji tidupf tipvipdi O fup'v desi jux zua hiv vji siwoixt O katv xepv vu lpux zua dep hiv vjin gus ni, tu vsetj vji tipvipdi vimmoph ni jux zua hiv vji mieft epf neli zuas vitvonupoem muphis.

Epf vjip howi e nusi fitdsoqvowi demm vu edvoup moli "Opvisitvif op vitvoph vjot vuum uav gus 60 fezt gsii?".
 
jetstoltz said:
Ov tuapft geli. Ati nusi pevasem janep mephaehi, emtu atoph vji qjseti "ov muult moli e muv ug datvunist fup'v miewi e siwoix" otp'v vjev hsiev. O xuamf sidunnipf djephoph vjev vu "Onehopi og zua jef nusi epf johjis tves siwoixt vjep emm zuas dunqivovust. Vjot xuamf sitamv op e muv nusi mieft epf howi zua ep uqqusvapovz vu seoti zuas qsodit xovjuav mutoph fiemt."

Gus vji tidupf tipvipdi O fup'v desi jux zua hiv vji siwoixt O katv xepv vu lpux zua dep hiv vjin gus ni, tu vsetj vji tipvipdi vimmoph ni jux zua hiv vji mieft epf neli zuas vitvonupoem muphis.

Epf vjip howi e nusi fitdsoqvowi demm vu edvoup moli "Opvisitvif op vitvoph vjot vuum uav gus 60 fezt gsii?".
Click to expand...

Vjeplt gus giifcedl.

Vji sietup xjz O opdmafif jux xi hiv vji siwoixt ot cideati vjiti qiuqmi esi cuncesfif xovj qelotvepot epf opfoept uggisoph vjin geli siwoixt tu ov dep ci foggodamv vu iptasi vjot otp'v niv xovj vji teni fotvetvi.

O ehsii xovj xjev zua teof ecuav vji fovdjoph muult moli e muv ug datvunist fup'v miewi e siwoix.
 
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Access Restricted: Unlock 1,000,000+ Posts

Stop Peeking Through the Keyhole.
Open the Door.

You hit a wall because the best advice isn't free—it's earned. Since 2007, MJ DeMarco has been active here daily (99.9% active rate), building a war room for entrepreneurs who refuse to settle for mediocrity.

  • Active Daily: Life-changing content posted dozens of times every day. No dead threads.
  • MJ's Inner Circle: Direct access to the author of The Millionaire Fastlane.
  • Vetted Network: Connect with founders scaling to 7 and 8 figures.
  • Proven Roadmaps: Strategy over motivation. Execution over "hustle porn."
"SCALED TO 6-FIGURE MONTHS"
"Tips and advice here saved me from huge mistakes, others allowed me to scale my business to 6-figure months."
— User MitchC
"INSANE QUALITY OF PEOPLE"
"The number of high quality people I've met from this forum has been insane. All of it predicated on building real value."
— User Richard Peck

"You are the average of the five people you surround yourself with."
Are you surrounding yourself with success?

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