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Gratitude. Why is this controversial? 2021 reflections.

Anything related to matters of the mind

Antifragile

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If you're like me, then there is no better way to end the year than with family, friends and reflection on all that has happened.

The brain is a very powerful tool, it can help you grow and change your life for the better. I know you might be thinking 'It's not that simple' or 'Gratitude sounds nice but it doesn't gel with my reality'.

  • Many people think that living in the moment, being grateful for what we have is bullshit. It isn't something that can help change our lives! But facts are facts. Why is this controversial?
  • Scientific studies have shown that practicing gratitude has massive benefits. Gratitude helps us feel happier about life, increase health and reduce stress to name a few.
  • Gratitude benefits individuals in school, business, sports and relationships!
  • Gratitude helps individuals focus on the positive things rather than the negatives ones.

So, how can you start? How about with reflecting back on 2021 and sharing here? What are you grateful for?

I'll start.

The year for me has been one of growth, learning and truly flourishing friendships.

  1. First, my family is the most important thing to me in this world. I am so blessed to have a family that is supportive and always there for me, no matter what. Most importantly, I am grateful not only for their support, but that they are healthy and happy.
  2. Second, I am grateful for my business. 2021 has been a year of prosperity and growth thanks to my amazing team. Our staff helped us get back on track after an uncertain time from the start of the pandemic. Back then we were in a tough spot. I am truly thankful for each and every one of them.
    I am thankful for having a business that allows me to spend more time with my my family - even during the weekdays. Time is the most important "asset" we have and spending time watching my kid growing up bring me immense joy. You can always make more money, but not time.
    MJ recently had an awesome quote (thanks MJ!):
    MJ DeMarco said:
    "You can always earn more money, but you can’t make more time. Using TIME for wealth is like your selling body parts for money … at some point, you’ll have no body left to enjoy your millions."
  3. And finally, I can't forget about the friendships that have blossomed this year either. I am so grateful for all the people who helped me in my life, business, pushed me to succeed.

    This place, Fastlane Forum, generated some of that! I connected with a few members in "real life" and feel a strong bond of friendship. I've come to realize that the biggest benefit of Fastlane Forum is the people you meet. (for all the new members reading this, take initiative, don't wait to be contacted - it's all in your hands).

    How about you folks? What are YOU grateful for? Post your answers.

Merry X-Mas and a Happy New Year!
 
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harlansjobs

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Too many people focus on what they don't have.
Being grateful helps you to live in the moment, to appreciate what you have now, rather than dwelling on the past, on the lousy hand in life that you may have drawn.

Keep a gratitude journal, not one of those WOO WOO LOA crap ones you see all over the internet, but rather one like I am grateful for my health, I am grateful today that I smiled at someone and had the possibility of making them feel good, that I helped a client achieve great things in their business, that I went to my kid's ball game, etc.

At the end of the week, read them out loud and see where they overlap. Do NOT list any bad or negative things, unless you were able to turn them into a positive.

What am I grateful for-
1. Being alive.
2. My amazing child.
3, Being able to learn from the people in the forum.
3. for Millionaire FastLane -re-reading- Unscripted and now Escaping the Rat Race.

Happy Holidays and Happy New Year to all.
 
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Mattie

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If you're like me, then there is no better way to end the year than with family, friends and reflection on all that has happened.

The brain is a very powerful tool, it can help you grow and change your life for the better. I know you might be thinking 'It's not that simple' or 'Gratitude sounds nice but it doesn't gel with my reality'.

  • Many people think that living in the moment, being grateful for what we have is bullshit. It isn't something that can help change our lives! But facts are facts. Why is this controversial?
  • Scientific studies have shown that practicing gratitude has massive benefits. Gratitude helps us feel happier about life, increase health and reduce stress to name a few.
  • Gratitude benefits individuals in school, business, sports and relationships!
  • Gratitude helps individuals focus on the positive things rather than the negatives ones.

So, how can you start? How about with reflecting back on 2021 and sharing here? What are you grateful for?

I'll start.

The year for me has been one of growth, learning and truly flourishing friendships.

  1. First, my family is the most important thing to me in this world. I am so blessed to have a family that is supportive and always there for me, no matter what. Most importantly, I am grateful not only for their support, but that they are healthy and happy.
  2. Second, I am grateful for my business. 2021 has been a year of prosperity and growth thanks to my amazing team. Our staff helped us get back on track after an uncertain time from the start of the pandemic. Back then we were in a tough spot. I am truly thankful for each and every one of them.
    I am thankful for having a business that allows me to spend more time with my my family - even during the weekdays. Time is the most important "asset" we have and spending time watching my kid growing up bring me immense joy. You can always make more money, but not time.
    MJ recently had an awesome quote (thanks MJ!):
    MJ DeMarco said:
    "You can always earn more money, but you can’t make more time. Using TIME for wealth is like your selling body parts for money … at some point, you’ll have no body left to enjoy your millions."
  3. And finally, I can't forget about the friendships that have blossomed this year either. I am so grateful for all the people who helped me in my life, business, pushed me to succeed.

    This place, Fastlane Forum, generated some of that! I connected with a few members in "real life" and feel a strong bond of friendship. I've come to realize that the biggest benefit of Fastlane Forum is the people you meet. (for all the new members reading this, take initiative, don't wait to be contacted - it's all in your hands).

    How about you folks? What are YOU grateful for? Post your answers.

Merry X-Mas and a Happy New Year!
I agree with you. I try to have Gratitude every day.
1. Everyone has been healthy this far and not gotten covid that I know personally as well as myself.
2. Excited about all the new stuff I've learned about writing and publishing.
3. Natural disasters haven't affected anyone I know and everyone is safe.
There are lots of things to have gratitude for.
There are lots of blessings every day if you look for them.
I do not dwell too much on the negatives.
I think we all have a choice what we focus on.
I would say Gratitude is probably one of the best lessons you can learn in life since in the past i did not really see the world through this lens.

When you appreciate the people around you, what wisdom, knowledge, and insight they have to offer, it's a great thing to hear from other people.

I think part of it is valuing everyone you meet.

If you have the growth mindset your not going to lose if your searching for win-win situations versus win-lose.

It may be possible if you have the win-lose mentality, you haven't learned about gratitude because you can only win if yourhead is out of the sand.

It's not really just about you in the world, but the whole group.

When you can see how you have a cause and effect on everyone then of course your going to put your best self out there and do your 100% best.

Too many people don't appreciate what others do for them, and then while they are doing things for them, they might not clearly see it.
 
Last edited:

Victor Musana

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Graditute is a must !!!
1.That my dad is able to walk after a stroke that hit him on 24th October this year. the rehabilitation center did a great job.
2.For sure this so amazing!!! I haven't fallen sick this entire year apart from minor headaches once in a while.OMG!!! not even Covid
3.Grateful to my friends and family many memories collected this year.

They are lots of things to be thankful for even the fact that I can still breath.

Frankly these days just saying "thank you " isn't enough cuz it has lost the sincerity in it. But as long as you are happy with what you do for others you'll have your piece.
Merry Christmas and happy new year
 
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SDE

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Thank you for writing this @Antifragile

Practicing gratitude can shift your mental state in a matter of moments. Gratitude is truly wonderful.

When I catch myself in a bad mood, I tend to look for one thing that I am grateful for in my life.

Just one little thing.

For example, I can see how beautiful and colorful the world is, thanks to my eyes. Some could not do this, unfortunately.

It was difficult in the beginning to try and be grateful when the mood was off but, with deliberate practice, I slowly began to feel the effects of being thankful. Doing it brings a sense of peace that words could not describe.

I am grateful for -


1. being alive and healthy

2. my family and for their health

3. the time that the forum contributors take every day to share their life and business experiences here.


P.S. Here is a beautiful quote from Oscar Wilde:

“If you don’t get everything you want, think of the things you don’t get that you don’t want.
 

WJK

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If you're like me, then there is no better way to end the year than with family, friends and reflection on all that has happened.

The brain is a very powerful tool, it can help you grow and change your life for the better. I know you might be thinking 'It's not that simple' or 'Gratitude sounds nice but it doesn't gel with my reality'.

  • Many people think that living in the moment, being grateful for what we have is bullshit. It isn't something that can help change our lives! But facts are facts. Why is this controversial?
  • Scientific studies have shown that practicing gratitude has massive benefits. Gratitude helps us feel happier about life, increase health and reduce stress to name a few.
  • Gratitude benefits individuals in school, business, sports and relationships!
  • Gratitude helps individuals focus on the positive things rather than the negatives ones.

So, how can you start? How about with reflecting back on 2021 and sharing here? What are you grateful for?

I'll start.

The year for me has been one of growth, learning and truly flourishing friendships.

  1. First, my family is the most important thing to me in this world. I am so blessed to have a family that is supportive and always there for me, no matter what. Most importantly, I am grateful not only for their support, but that they are healthy and happy.
  2. Second, I am grateful for my business. 2021 has been a year of prosperity and growth thanks to my amazing team. Our staff helped us get back on track after an uncertain time from the start of the pandemic. Back then we were in a tough spot. I am truly thankful for each and every one of them.
    I am thankful for having a business that allows me to spend more time with my my family - even during the weekdays. Time is the most important "asset" we have and spending time watching my kid growing up bring me immense joy. You can always make more money, but not time.
    MJ recently had an awesome quote (thanks MJ!):
    MJ DeMarco said:
    "You can always earn more money, but you can’t make more time. Using TIME for wealth is like your selling body parts for money … at some point, you’ll have no body left to enjoy your millions."
  3. And finally, I can't forget about the friendships that have blossomed this year either. I am so grateful for all the people who helped me in my life, business, pushed me to succeed.

    This place, Fastlane Forum, generated some of that! I connected with a few members in "real life" and feel a strong bond of friendship. I've come to realize that the biggest benefit of Fastlane Forum is the people you meet. (for all the new members reading this, take initiative, don't wait to be contacted - it's all in your hands).

    How about you folks? What are YOU grateful for? Post your answers.

Merry X-Mas and a Happy New Year!
I'm very grateful for this last year. It's been a banner year for me -- a parade of successes coming one after another.
 

Andreas Thiel

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Nuns that were happy lived longer. Or were Nuns that were going to live longer just happier?
 
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Antifragile

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Andreas Thiel

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Antifragile

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Where are you going with that question?

Sometimes I find your posts confusing. There was that chat we had on the "mindset" fixed or not thread. I was sure you were talking about believing that we can't grow, we are just dealt the cards we get and that's it. But you denied it in your reply to me. Clearly I have a hard time following some of your posts.

In this case, I am not sure what your analogy with the Nuns that are happy and live long and those who live long are happy implies.

Do you believe that gratitude is a waste of effort? Useless horseshit?
 
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WJK

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Sometimes I find your posts confusing. There was that chat we had on the "mindset" fixed or not thread. I was sure you were talking about believing that we can't grow, we are just dealt the cards we get and that's it. But you denied it in your reply to me. Clearly I have a hard time following some of your posts.

In this case, I am not sure what your analogy with the Nuns that are happy and live long and those who live long are happy implies.

Do you believe that gratitude is a waste of effort? Useless horseshit?
I read in a book when I was very young that women die prematurely because no one loves them. I think that gratitude is right up there with love. I have watched people who lack either just fall apart -- along with their lives.
 

Andreas Thiel

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Sometimes I find your posts confusing. There was that chat we had on the "mindset" fixed or not thread. I was sure you were talking about believing that we can't grow, we are just dealt the cards we get and that's it. But you denied it in your reply to me. Clearly I have a hard time following some of your posts.

In this case, I am not sure what your analogy with the Nuns that are happy and live long and those who live long are happy implies.

Do you believe that gratitude is a waste of effort? Useless horseshit?
I think many claims are leaps and not proven by science, as the authors often claim.

Change your beliefs and they change your actions ... I don't think that is true.
I think a growth mindset is a prerequisite, yes, but the message that things will take care of themselves then, I find that message dangerous because it does the opposite of what the FTE does: it kills a sense of urgency to take action through resistence.

Your claim that science has proven that gratitude is important is a leap as well.
Reading "The happiness equation" (the book by Nick Powdthavee) it becomes clear that it is pretty much impossible to get a scientifically undisputable result when it comes to subjective measurements like self reported happiness.

The nuns example is one that is commonly used to "prove" that happiness leads to a longer life.
I doubt that they got cause and effect right. There are too many parts that make up one person. The genetics, the brain, the ailments / injuries, the mental health issues ...
They measured that the nuns who reported that they were happier lived longer than nuns that were not as happy and showed less gratitude. I think we can't know cause and effect and it is just as likely that they were dealt a worse hand and had a harder time just being grateful than the other nuns. Just looking into dopamine levels and differences between people says this is too complex to get strong, scientifically significant results.
No, I am not saying it is a waste of time, I am answering the question in the title. Why this might be controversial.
I am pretty sure that gratitude doesn't have a negative effect and there is a chance that the claims are correct and you can increase your life expectancy with gratitude alone. I just don't think there is evidence strong enough that you can call it a fact.
 

WJK

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I think many claims are leaps and not proven by science, as the authors often claim.

Change your beliefs and they change your actions ... I don't think that is true.
That is your point of view. And it's based upon your experiences. I respect that.

I see all of it differently. I believe that the way to create change in your life is to change your beliefs and your paradigm. I believe that we can each take the same fact patterns in our lives and rewrite our stories based on how we see the world. And I don't need to prove my beliefs through the scientific process. It is enough that those beliefs work for me. They have sure made me a lucky girl! Maybe I'm a dreamer. Maybe I'm just a sap for a good line. That's OK with me. I've had a good life full of people who love me.
 
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FastNAwesome

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Thank you for this thread.

I used to practice gratitude every morning, pondering on 3 things I'm grateful for.
When I did, it really affected how I approach everyone and everything I have in my life.

Did me well. Time to start again.
 

Kevin88660

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To feel grateful, all you need is to watch youtube videos of poor people in developing country working 16hr a day for below poverty level wages. Some of the job (collecting precious stones near volcano with polluted air ) will inflict long term health damages very quickly that leave them die in their late 40s or 50s.
 

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I’m grateful for my health and family first and foremost. My kids are my greatest joy (and frustration sometimes… haha).

Work wise, I’m grateful to be doing something I’m still passionate about that also pays the bills.

I’m very grateful we’re in an era where we can help people online so easily via YouTube, email newsletters, and paid memberships/courses.

And I’m forever grateful for my parents who instilled in me family values and the importance of being optimistic, cheerful, and friendly.
 

MTF

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Calling on
To share what they are grateful for. And no, Kak is not allowed to be grateful for "go Brandon" videos. ;)

I have my own thread on gratitude :smile:

 

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Calling on
To share what they are grateful for. And no, Kak is not allowed to be grateful for "go Brandon" videos. ;)
Post in thread 'What Are You Grateful For Today?'
MINDSET - CHAT - What Are You Grateful For Today?

I posted this in @MTF s thread.

“I have a fricking beautiful family. My son is awesome. My wife is awesome. My dog is awesome.

I’m grateful that I get to do what I do every day.”

I will add to this… Friends, particularly entrepreneurial friends.
 
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G

Guest-5ty5s4

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Calling on
To share what they are grateful for. And no, Kak is not allowed to be grateful for "go Brandon" videos. ;)
Yes, in the other thread I said I am grateful to be alive - because that alone is endless opportunity.

I’m also grateful for my family, my friends, the place I was born and the time I was born in, and for all the great people here on this forum!
 
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Thanks for the call out.

I'm grateful for my incredibly loving family. Also for my dogs that I spend more time with than any single person.

I learned that I am grateful for health. Although I'm strong for my age, I spent the last 4 years in discomfort. I announced at some point that my problems had gone away. They came back though.

But now the ninth doctor that I went to see figured it out and fixed the problem during my first visit with him. The atlas bone was not aligned with my backbone or skull. It was cutting off bloodflow and the nerves that run through it. He popped it back into place with a punch. Fine every since.

I'm also grateful for the security I have in life. I have enough money to do all the things I want to do. Not really trying to make more. Working a bit on the golf course for fun but mostly just running around doing activities.

Basically grateful for everything and everybody. My life is not perfect but that does not exist. It is as good as I could have ever hoped for though.
 
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Antifragile

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Yes, in the other thread I said I am grateful to be alive - because that alone is endless opportunity.

I’m also grateful for my family, my friends, the place I was born and the time I was born in, and for all the great people here on this forum!
Anything special happened in 2021? What was most memorable? (In a good way).
 
G

Guest-5ty5s4

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Anything special happened in 2021? What was most memorable? (In a good way).
The most notable would be the house I bought and have renovated. That has been a phenomenal move, and has doubled my net worth on paper (I bought it for 70% of appraised value and then did a lot of repairs too). I was blessed to find that deal.

Another special thing that happened was being the best man in a childhood friend’s wedding. That was great and I’m thankful to have some very close friends who are still around.

Also grateful for business to slowly be ticking up a bit, with more people hired back.
 
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Anything special happened in 2021? What was most memorable? (In a good way).
I’m grateful for my mum getting to stay for an amazing week over Christmas.

I’m grateful my client work keeps ticking over without too much input from me.

Grateful to have dropped Twitter and rekindled my interest in YouTube.
 

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Great podcast, well worth a listen (not just this episode).
It also has timestamps in video description, best I've seen anywhere:)

@Lex DeVille 00:01:50 very relevant to copywriting:)
 

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This is a great thread. What better time to sit back and reflect as I know I have not practiced the art of Gratitude at all this year. It has been a whirlwind of a year, as it has been for many. So here is goes.

- First, my family. I have 2 amazing kids, supportive wife and a third on the way! (Last one!). My eldest, only 7, has really shown interest in the 'side business' which I am trying to help encourage. Also my Mother has been great, looking after kids when she can and always being there for a chat.

- My business. This year I officially launched at the start of the year. An online business. I invested 15k and while I haven't made massive profits, I am really grateful that I have not only learnt alot and met some new friends, but found new opportunities. We will finish at just over 80k in sales for the year. I'm quite happy with this.

- My full time work. While I don't want to be there, I want to be fully self supportive, I think it's important to reflect that I have an understanding employer who not only pays reasonably well, they have understood when I have needed to care for family this year including being thrown into isolation periods due to COVID twice!

There is plenty more that I am grateful for but these are the main ones I wanted to make note of. I wish everyone on here a Happy New Year. I know I'm planning on coming back refreshed with a fresh mindset next year. Time to crush some goals!
 
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I would like to think our view about gratitude tend to changes when things happen in our lives and as we grow.

Type of events that changes our perspective of life and make us realize how the most simple things of life that we tend to disregard and forgot about..are now the most essential.

In a way, it makes you connect more with your real goals and your inner self, it helps to focus on the right thing, at least for me.
 

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Every time I take a HOT SHOWER I feel immense gratitude.
Every time I take a big drink of cold, clean water, I feel immense gratitude.
Every time I climb into a warm bed with clean sheets, I feel immense gratitude.
Every time I open the fridge and see shelves of fresh fruit and veggies, I feel immense gratitude.
Every time I walk into a grocery store and see wall-to-wall options, I feel immense gratitude.
Every time I hear my dog (or my wife) snoring, I feel immense gratitude.

Gratitude can equate to contentment, and there is a fine balance between allowing contentment equate to comfort and "donothingness" and staying motivated. It's quite a mental balancing act!
 

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