What are your thoughts on "Privilege"?

[Almantas]

I refuse to let some a**hole make me feel bad for being a 61 y/o, married, educated, semi-retired white guy.

I refuse to let some a**hole make me feel bad for being a 25 y/o, but looking like 35. Lol.

 

[TonyStark]

My sincere apologies dear Sir.

My thoughts on this debate:

View: https://youtu.be/gWIi6Pytde8

 

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[G-Man]

When I have the masochistic urge to watch FB arguments about privilege ultimately devolve into people insulting each other, I realize that one of the biggest ways I'm privileged, ironically, was that my parents raised us with the expectation that life isn't fair. Here's one of the instances I remember best.

Dad: That kid picked on you again? Did you hit him?
Me: Yeah, but I got detention too, even though he was the one picking on me.
Dad: Those are the rules. You get in a fight, you get detention.
Me: But I didn't do anything wrong. You told me to punch him.
Dad: I know, buddy. Good job. I'm proud of you.
Me: But he was picking on me, and I was just doing what you said. It's not fair.
Dad: Life's not fair, buddy. Try to get some homework done during detention. Your mom picked up a couple extra shifts this week.

"Life's not fair" was my dad's go to expression when dealing with frustrated or disappointed little boys. Probably number 2 after "Did you already ask mom?"

 

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[MidwestLandlord]

He owns several burger joints in poorer areas of rural Texas. I asked him how business is going at the new restaraunts. (He had just opened 3 new ones the last time I saw him) He said he literally can’t find enough employees in the area. Why? Because of government programs out bidding him. These folks literally get paid more to voluntarily stay a SLAVE to the government than to start working their way out by making some money and learning how a business works.

Same.

I had to cut hours from lack of help. Spent big money on automation in order to stay in business.

Automating worked so well I cut hours even further than needed and let 30% of my crew go. Machines are cheaper than competing with the government for employees.

(I had multiple hourly part time cashiers demand a severance check. Are you kidding me?? Go sit on unemployment "insurance" that I'm paying 6% on top of the payroll for! There's your severance!)

As an employer I suppose I get the "privilege" of paying for multiple forms of slavery.

 

[Ecom man]

The main problem I have with the entire "privilege" argument is that people use it as an excuse why they can't. I can't get ahead because they had better parents. I can't get ahead because they got a scholarship and I didn't. I can't get ahead because of....

If you are over 18 where you are in this thing called life is your choice. Still living in Chicago? Your choice. Still living on welfare? Your choice. Been working at Mcdonalds for 5 years? Your choice.

Someone I know works part time at a job making $12 an hour. I asked him when he was going to get full time and he said probably never. He whines and complains about never having any money and how life isn't fair but in reality it is his choices that have put him where he is at and it is him choosing not to make a change that causes his future to suck as well.

We live in one of the best countries in the world that allows you to get ahead no matter your background. How do some people from poor backgrounds become millionaires while some people from rich backgrounds OD in their 20s? They make choices that put them there.

 

[TreyAllDay]

Okay. I was poor growing up. My mom was on welfare, dad was gone. The only money I had was from shit jobs. Cleaning horse stables was a shit job. Delivering papers at 4:00 am was a shit job.

I chose not to be a victim. Pleasure did not come from what my parents gave me. My siblings and I found our own ways to be happy. All of us have been successful in our own ways.

I got my first apartment on $1.85 per hour plus some overtime. There was no way to pay for a car repair, dining out, movies, cable tv on the wages. I paid my rent on time, worked hard, and fixed my own car.

There was no help from the outside.

Life was fun though. We did things that did not take a lot of money like picnics, bbq's, hikes in the mountains, lots of parties, etc.

I would have been one of the under privileged that did not graduate high school.

If there were people that had a head start on me.... I did not see or care about them. The focus was on what needed to be done.

There is free education if you are a minority should you chose this path. You may start out steps behind but don't need to stay there. Hard work and perseverance will carry you forward in most cases.

Victimhood is the real disadvantage.

Love this! I agree that in some ways, being "privileged" can almost be a disadvantage, you work less and you have less contrast for when times are good.

 

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[jon.a]

I think if you’re born in America, you should be considered “privileged”.

Any of us that have visited a developing country know that.

 

[rollerskates]

I think the ultimate privilege is the luxury of not even having to use your brain by crying "privilege" all the time.

 

[Carol Jones]

Greetings from rural Australia.

We are who we are.

Privileged. Or not privileged.

Our upbring shapes our lives. We either embrace it. Or we rail against it. Whatever our choice. Is who we become.

Let's do a reconnaissance of the haves not alot. And the haves alot.

Let's look at those who come from modest. Or even. Dysfunctional. Families. They may have not alot. Or a modest amount of have. Nothing sensational.

Richard Branson

Tony Robbins

Oprah Winfrey

Bill Gates

Warren Buffett

Elon Musk

Barack Obama

Jeff Bezos

Hope and optimism flow through their veins. All can do people.

There are more self made billionaires in this category. Than those who inherited wealth.


Now let's look at the lives of the privileged. These men and women have alot! They are not deprived of anything in their lives.

Carrie Fisher

Prince Andrew

Donald Trump

Christian Brando (Son of Marlon)

Cheyenne Brando (Daughter of Marlon)

Bobby Kristina Brown (Daughter of Whitney Houston & Bobby Brown)

Sean Lennon

John Paul Getty III

Harvey Weinstein

Most of these people lead a life of misery. Not measuring up to their parents. Or live in a bubble that bears no resemblance to reality. And some are devoid of basic human decency.

Which side of the tracks do you prefer to be born on? ~Carol❤

 

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[Kak]

Progressive thinkers, in their desire to out 'privilege' as the problem with society, are falling into the same deterministic trap that far-right politicians use to support bigoted policy

I can’t think of a policy more “bigoted” than affirmative action.

 

[Steppenwolf]

Take 2 steps forward if you`re on the fastlane forum

 

[G-Man]

So while we may all start in different spots at age 12, it doesn't really translate to where we end up at age 50.

“What sense would it make to classify a man as handicapped because he is in a wheelchair today, if he is expected to be walking again in a month, and competing in track meets before the year is out? Yet Americans are generally given 'class' labels on the basis of their transient location in the income stream. If most Americans do not stay in the same broad income bracket for even a decade, their repeatedly changing 'class' makes class itself a nebulous concept. Yet the intelligentsia are habituated, if not addicted, to seeing the world in class terms.”
― Thomas Sowell, The Vision of the Anointed: Self-Congratulation as a Basis for Social Policy

 

[WJK]

Yep In Canada, we have Employment Insurance for layoffs - not sure if this is the same thing in US. Anyway, I have a ton of friends who are on EI and just sit around doing nothing. It's insane, the things I'd be able to get done with all expenses paid and 14 free hours per day.

I have a lot of tenants who are on disability or public assistance. You would think, with all that time, they'd get a lot done. It's not true. Like your friends on EI, typically they too sit around watching TV, playing on-line games and wasting the moment. I have learned that the lack of structure in the lives many times makes them unable to function in the real world. Count your blessings. You can get more done in a fraction of those hours -- and be able to hold your head up high. Self reliance can never be overrated. Welfare here in the US controls a lot of people's lives. It is not a living -- it's barely an existence, and it has made a lot more slaves out of recipients than were ever in our pre-Civil War South. It's a mental slavery where people feel that they can't live without that tiny little stream of money, and go make it on their own. Where's the dignity in that? You sure don't wanna join those ranks of people who have no real direction and are demeaned by their palpable lack of drive.

(Also, I'll tell you a secret... when a person receives something that they feel, or know, that they have not earned and/or deserve, they hate the person or institution that gave it to them. In time, they also hate themselves, which makes them childishly and irrationally angry at everyone around them.)

 

[WJK]

Very admirable, great meaning and purpose.

Yes. And I'm sure some may not agree, but I think us as entrepreneurs have a responsibility to reach out and help people who aren't as lucky, I think it's the meaning of life. That's why I admire MJ - he helped open the door for many other people who may not have come to the realisation themselves. My ultimate goal is to have enough money to fund inner city programs for children.

Been there. Done that. Have that ticket stub and it was all very meaningful. (I helped start a women's shelter in Los Angeles and I was Chairman of the Board for 5 years.) So is my work today in Alaska -- with my group of low and moderate income tenants.

I have learned that you don't have to wait until you "have enough money". Start today. Do something small. Even the smallest jester can mean so much in another person's life. And there are many thing you can do to really help, that can be done without costing a dime. I try to pay forward as much as I can. But, there's a key to it. I always let them keep their dignity. I ask them for a small favor at that time, or one to be named in the future. I ask for something very small, that I know they can do, in exchange for my help. And I have built an army of people who go out of their way to help me whenever they can. They stop by my office to see if I need anything. And, I have a whole bunch of kids belonging to my tenants, who following me around as though I was a mother duck.

But, I won't help people who won't help themselves, in most circumstances. And I have very strict rules -- I don't just hand out help anytime that I am asked. I don't hand out money. They have to ask nice for help, and make a good case for themselves. Most times they have to present me with their plan to fix the problem, with my help. And then a plan for checking their progress. It makes my time and attention precious to them as well as to me. I'm big on teaching people to fish, rather than giving them a fish!

 

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[Harbourmaster]

Unless you have a crippling mental or physical illness or live in a dictatorship, there is always work you can do towards creating the life you want to live.

There are always some people starting out ahead of you, and some people starting off in what appears to be a worse situation than you. I find the ones that have to travel farther along their journey to success way more interesting and inspiring.

 

[fhs8]

Privilege is the excuse people give for their failures as a result of their own actions. If anything the people claiming that they're disadvantaged benefit from enormous privilege from scholarships, affordable housing, free healthcare, government grants/loans for minorities (MBDA), affirmative action in college/work, food stamps, charities, clubs, electricity, gas, and dozens if not hundreds of other benefits depending on the jurisdiction such as low income cell phones and internet. So who really are the privileged? How come the guy in the video didn't mention all the privileges I've mentioned?

 

[jon.a]

The problem isn't being a victim, the problem is we've turned into a nation of liars who lie to themselves.

Whenever I've been victimized, ultimately, I'm usually the one to blame; a poor decision, a poor action, something. No one takes responsibility for their actions (or lack of action) and their default inclination is to blame someone, something, or some institution.




Well I will disagree with you here. I'm guessing too many people on welfare feel they deserve it. They're special for no reason other than they breathe. In fact, the feel they're not getting enough. It's called entitlement.

We've had some folks here on welfare who absolutely hated being on it. I'm feeling they're the minority.

When I reenlisted, after the birth of our second child we qualified for food stamps and WIC. That pissed me off. I'm trying to do the military career thing and I qualify for food stamps? Just F*cking WOW! After my next promotion, we no longer qualified. We were no better off financially but it sure felt better.

 

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[Fox]

Didn't watch. I avoid this type of content like second hand smoke or asbestos.

Some great points in these comments though. People should be posting them under the original video too.

 

[WJK]

The problem isn't being a victim, the problem is we've turned into a nation of liars who lie to themselves.

Whenever I've been victimized, ultimately, I'm usually the one to blame; a poor decision, a poor action, something. No one takes responsibility for their actions (or lack of action) and their default inclination is to blame someone, something, or some institution.
Well I will disagree with you here. I'm guessing too many people on welfare feel they deserve it. They're special for no reason other than they breathe. In fact, the feel they're not getting enough. It's called entitlement.

When you drill down through that entitlement offensive tirade -- which is usually their big defenses coming to the front -- you'll generally finding a helpless childish person behind that facade who has no pride, passion or drive. They are mad at everyone and they have an excuse for everything. They say everyone else is to blame, but I've noticed that they abuse themselves as well with drinking, drugs, binging on food and anything self-destructive they can find. The bottom line is that there is almost always a big dose of self-loathing that triggers these life threatening behaviors. They feel out of control of their lives, and they are.

They are usually self-defeating as well. That's when the person get things going their way, and ruins that success before it can be realized. They shoot themselves in the foot in a self-defeating pattern over and over again, situation after situation, in a downward spiral. It makes for a real mess.

 

[StevieB]

This video doesn't demonstrate anything except how well some people are at making up excuses.

I mean just listen to some of the things they define as "privilege". Paying for college? Had a personal tutor? Had a father figure?

Completely scripted thinking that these types of things are what gets you '2 steps ahead' in life that is complete BS. What get's you ahead in life is taking the drivers seat of your life and taking action every day to make yourself and your own actions more valuable to the world.

How many billionares and multimillionares dropped out of college or even high school for that matter? Had a personal tutor, are you kidding me?

Real privilege is being born in a country that enables you to forge your own destiny because the infrastructure is already in place for your most basic requirements like food, water, and shelter to be met easily.

Elon Musk mentioned this when he was first starting out how easy it was to live off a few hot dogs a day, once he realized that he could be dead broke and still actually stay alive from there he was able to accept the risks he took.

I don't make nearly as much as many members of this forum but I'm already over the 6-figure mark and am well on track on hitting almost 200k next year. I was kicked out of my house by my dad at 15, dropped out of high school and got mixed up in the wrong crowd of drug users living in trailers growing up.

Yet here I am making more than the large majority of college degree earners, being a former weed toking high school kicked out my house by my dad at 15 dropout. I must have super powers because I ran in front of a lot of those people.


Some people could have everything they said in the video and still be living paycheck to paycheck. Your MENTAL process is what get's you ahead in life, NOT what's given to you. Hell you could be given millions of dollars and be living on the street within a few years. How's that for "privilege"?

 

[Longinus]

I wasn't raised to become a delicate little snowflake, so yes, I feel pretty privileged.

 

[TreyAllDay]

How do you blame a kid for not succeeding when his entire life he was surrounded by negativity, abuse, neglect? How can he be expected to know any better?

This is an interesting question I often think about. I think the ultimate goal is you have to believe free will exists, and you can do anything to get out of your situation. Otherwise, what else can you do? That being said, I have a close friend, his brother died when he was 10 (gang violence), his mom went crazy, she was a prostitute. His dad was a loser, etc - just a complete MESS of an upbringing. He's done okay, but I don't think the idea that he is capable of anything is in his head. Coming from that sort of environment, it's not likely you'll think that way.

On another note, know a guy who grew up in a reservation, sexually abused starting at 3 years old, kicked out of home, joined a gang, beaten to the edge of his life when he left it, etc. Got in touch with his roots and turned his life around, owns a business and speaks to at risk kids.

 

[Iammelissamoore]

I think also - Privilege is dependent on perspective - in the sense that, if you choose not to see what others are about OR, better yet, choose not to have the time to focus on what others have from what others don't have, it is easier for you to focus on what you have and what you need to get done to accomplish x, y, z in life. I have read SO many of your remarkable stories throughout this post and one thing I see most prevalent, is the ability to recognise what each of you/family members have(had) and recognise what the next step must be. i.e. Y.O.U are determining YOUR story, Y.O.U are determining what YOU do next, regardless of the limits society places on you; You/Your family members determine how their family legacies will unravel - they didn't allow society to tell them what they should do, they didn't allow any gatekeepers to tell them what they should do and in each case you/your family members didn't allow the basics you each had to limit you from doing more, because, at the end of the day you recognise that you aren't doing this just for you, you see it necessary to do what you need to, because there are others counting on you; whether it is family back home (from whichever country you may have come from), whether it is your children who will have a live example of what it is to go beyond that which society determines for them or whether it is for the community you wish to uplift.

The Fastlane Principle is one which shows us that it doesn't matter if you are rich or poor, black or white, young or young-at-heart to get ahead, what the Fastlane Principle teaches is that we are ALL privileged in one way or the other - as most of you mentioned - just being born is a privilege; sure, none of us asked to be here, none of us asked to be born where we were born, none of us asked to be born with the physical traits we have, none of us asked to be rich or poor, BUT what do we do? We are here, do we willow in the sorrows of life OR do we look at the possibilities ahead of us to push on?

Life, like privilege, is ALL about perspective, and we choose the story we wish to tell, we are the only gatekeepers of our lives, there is no one who hold control over our lives, unless we allow them. In this system of life, there's always a loophole get ahead, we're doing it right here through this forum/fastlaning, the setbacks we may experience, are simply the unforeseen strengthening moments which are giving us even more reason to excel.

 

[TheodoreA]

I've seen privileged kids waste their lives away on video games and television, and spending weeks and weeks on vacations they can't afford, dooming themselves to a life of inadequacy. These kids end up working for the under-privileged kids who worked hard and created a life for themselves that they can enjoy.

Being privileged gives you a head start, but it doesn't win you the race.

 

[The-J]

Here's my thoughts (which border on the 'politically incorrect'):

Progressive thinkers, in their desire to out 'privilege' as the problem with society, are falling into the same deterministic trap that far-right politicians use to support bigoted policy. The only difference is that the privileged 'class' becomes the boogeyman rather than the disadvantaged minority.

Progressive thinkers tend to believe that the unequal distribution of outcomes is what causes unrest in society. It's not. Blaming others for the problems in society is.

When people think that the problems stem from something out of their control, they learn to be helpless. They lash out at people who even try to break the mold, and then when they meet a minor setback, they're the first ones to say 'I told you so'.

On one hand, that explains the problems with communities that once faced legal discrimination. On the other hand, it also provides a solution. For an individual, though, there's no good excuse. Either be happy with your lot in life (and don't be a dick to those who want to grow), or put in the work to change it.

 

[The-J]

I can’t think of a policy more “bigoted” than affirmative action.

It also doesn't work.

 

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[minivanman]

Not being able to find people to work is why I got out of the residential cleaning business. It was still a HUGE money maker but it became such a hassle to find anyone to work. Then if someone new would show up, they would suck so they might as well have not even showed up.

I had so much profit built in to my price I could have paid $30 an hour and still been on the plus side but there comes a time when I draw the line.... and I woke up one day and that was the day I drew the line.

I think the real privilege in America is on the side of those collecting paychecks from the government.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

"The right to be a victim", or "The right to be victimized"

The problem isn't being a victim, the problem is we've turned into a nation of liars who lie to themselves.

Whenever I've been victimized, ultimately, I'm usually the one to blame; a poor decision, a poor action, something. No one takes responsibility for their actions (or lack of action) and their default inclination is to blame someone, something, or some institution.

when a person receives something that they feel, or know, that they have not earned and/or deserve, they hate the person or institution that gave it to them

Well I will disagree with you here. I'm guessing too many people on welfare feel they deserve it. They're special for no reason other than they breathe. In fact, the feel they're not getting enough. It's called entitlement.

We've had some folks here on welfare who absolutely hated being on it. I'm feeling they're the minority.

 

[C-Jay]

I mean, yeah, it definitely exists. But it works both ways.

I grew up comfortably upper-middle class to responsible parents living well in the slowlane. Did they tell me to work hard? Yes. Did I get an allowance simply for being a child? No.

My up-bringing wasn't exactly difficult. I never really experienced true fundamental hardship. Food was always on the table. I was motivated, but it wasn't out of fear of "not making it". Eventually joined the army, experienced some hardship, and my perspective on life has developed over time.

So you could say I got the happy medium. I've seen both extremes. I know people who grew up getting the shit kicked out of them by their drug addict parents. Or having their parents pawn their xbox because the next cheque didn't come until Monday. Some of those kids are first-rate disasters now, products of their environment. I truly believe that the complete absence of privilege set these people up for failure. How do you blame a kid for not succeeding when his entire life he was surrounded by negativity, abuse, neglect? How can he be expected to know any better? On the other hand, you get the ones who find a way to channel their hardship into drive, determination, and purpose. There's a ton of them in this thread alone. Why can some do that and other's can't? Not a clue.

Then you have the ultra-privileged. The ones who drove a brand new car at 16 years old (honourable mention to my 1994 Chevrolet, RIP). The ones who had the newest toy, the nicest clothes, and no intention of getting a high school job as a grocery store clerk. I know plenty of these kids too. Some have hit absolute home runs. They're smart, self-sufficient professionals or business owners and, often, decent and empathetic people. I also know a few who squandered it, have went to jail, or still live with their parents in their mid-late 20's with zero future prospects.

So yes, privilege is a thing. It can influence one way or another and is most definitely a contributing factor to the development of some people, depending on the scale of the privilege or lack thereof. But it's not exclusive. Succeeding heavily in life is about being the exception, not the norm.

 

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[C-Jay]

This is an interesting question I often think about. I think the ultimate goal is you have to believe free will exists, and you can do anything to get out of your situation. Otherwise, what else can you do? That being said, I have a close friend, his brother died when he was 10 (gang violence), his mom went crazy, she was a prostitute. His dad was a loser, etc - just a complete MESS of an upbringing. He's done okay, but I don't think the idea that he is capable of anything is in his head. How can he, coming from that environment?

Completely agree. It's so much more than just a bad up-bringing. People who had it this bad are also likely to lack the development (of intelligence, creativity, focus, etc) they require from the nurturing process. Without role models to teach you and set an example, it can be near-impossible to break out of that, or even to acknowledge the possibility or the desire to do so.

Some definitely do, and I admire them, but it's such an ambiguous circumstance that I don't wish on anyone.