It is with some reluctance that I am here to report that I have finally had my, F*ck You Moment. I use the word, reluctance, because I am married to a member of this forum who has been word-barfing the contents of this place for about the last three years… I was not listening.
I’m a stubborn woman, so this is not an easy thing for me to admit.
The F*ck You Moment went as follows… I was attending a supper club meeting at my friend’s apartment down the street. I am the leader of this supper club, and I am very proud of my creation. It consists of a group of nine Chicago women who meet every six weeks to cook, drink too much wine, and talk for about 5 hours straight. I have gathered women from different facets of my life to share common interests and enjoy one another’s company. It really does bring me joy to see it in action.
So how could a night of surface-level debauchery go so terribly wrong?
I had just experienced the 2018 Fastlane Summit in Scottsdale, and I was still feeling pretty high. I wanted to share this excitement with my friends, so I decided to drop a bomb on them after the small-talk had subsided. I told them EVERYTHING. Everything that I took away from the weekend, and everything that lead us to attend the Summit in the first place. I pretty much had to start from the beginning, because some of them didn’t even know that my husband and I were trying to start a business in the first place. I completely monopolized the conversation for about the first hour of the evening and, actually, there was not much conversation at all. I basically performed a monologue for my audience.
While I was speaking, I noticed three types of reactions. There was Person A who had no idea what I was talking about, but she wanted to be polite so she asked a few basic questions. There was Person B who also had no idea what I was talking about, but her questions were a little more meaningful and her eyes weren’t completely empty. And then there was Person C who, again, had no idea what I was talking about and did a poor job of hiding it through spastic nodding and judgmental glances. Obviously, Person C was the worst type. I found myself looking to the A’s and B’s most of the time for validation, but the energy was weak. I started to feel embarrassed and awkward. I started to question myself, and then I started to question my friends. I started to get pissed and irritated and, ultimately, I started to feel alone.
In true female form, I masked my emotions by eventually transitioning into another topic and smiling all the while. In true ME form, my brain was racing and I couldn’t wait to get out of there.
Now, I’m not here to tell you that I’m breaking up with my all of my slow-lane friends and that I have decided to only socialize with entrepreneurs from now on. That would not be realistic, and I do not want to let go of the value that my current friendships provide. My plan is to simply compartmentalize my current friendships by the value they add to my life while expanding my efforts to meet an array of people who challenge and understand me in different ways. That’s where you come in!
I am beyond thrilled to have finally joined this group. After reading Unscripted last year, I started looking at the world through a difference lens. I was repulsed by my environment Mon-Fri, and I felt like everyone I worked with was a mindless zombie; but, for some crazy reason, I still wasn't all that interested in joining this forum. After meeting many of you in Scottsdale, I felt honored and humbled. And after my experience the other night with my girlfriends, I can honestly say that I am finally ready to see what this community is all about.
Full disclosure: I am not my husband. He is technical, task-oriented, and incredibly organized. I am his detail-obsessed, emotion-driven, highly interpersonal counterpart. I like to think that I am creative, insightful, and honest. I am often the leader amongst my friends, and I am definitely the leader amongst my siblings. I am passionate about the art of storytelling in the form of literature, theatre, or music; and I believe that a healthy lifestyle is one of mental and physical balance. I am most eager to discuss branding and marketing strategies, but I am also looking to get out of my comfort zone and dive into topics that I know little to nothing about. I think that I bring a lot to the table, but I know that I have so much to learn. Let the growing begin!
I’m a stubborn woman, so this is not an easy thing for me to admit.
The F*ck You Moment went as follows… I was attending a supper club meeting at my friend’s apartment down the street. I am the leader of this supper club, and I am very proud of my creation. It consists of a group of nine Chicago women who meet every six weeks to cook, drink too much wine, and talk for about 5 hours straight. I have gathered women from different facets of my life to share common interests and enjoy one another’s company. It really does bring me joy to see it in action.
So how could a night of surface-level debauchery go so terribly wrong?
I had just experienced the 2018 Fastlane Summit in Scottsdale, and I was still feeling pretty high. I wanted to share this excitement with my friends, so I decided to drop a bomb on them after the small-talk had subsided. I told them EVERYTHING. Everything that I took away from the weekend, and everything that lead us to attend the Summit in the first place. I pretty much had to start from the beginning, because some of them didn’t even know that my husband and I were trying to start a business in the first place. I completely monopolized the conversation for about the first hour of the evening and, actually, there was not much conversation at all. I basically performed a monologue for my audience.
While I was speaking, I noticed three types of reactions. There was Person A who had no idea what I was talking about, but she wanted to be polite so she asked a few basic questions. There was Person B who also had no idea what I was talking about, but her questions were a little more meaningful and her eyes weren’t completely empty. And then there was Person C who, again, had no idea what I was talking about and did a poor job of hiding it through spastic nodding and judgmental glances. Obviously, Person C was the worst type. I found myself looking to the A’s and B’s most of the time for validation, but the energy was weak. I started to feel embarrassed and awkward. I started to question myself, and then I started to question my friends. I started to get pissed and irritated and, ultimately, I started to feel alone.
In true female form, I masked my emotions by eventually transitioning into another topic and smiling all the while. In true ME form, my brain was racing and I couldn’t wait to get out of there.
Now, I’m not here to tell you that I’m breaking up with my all of my slow-lane friends and that I have decided to only socialize with entrepreneurs from now on. That would not be realistic, and I do not want to let go of the value that my current friendships provide. My plan is to simply compartmentalize my current friendships by the value they add to my life while expanding my efforts to meet an array of people who challenge and understand me in different ways. That’s where you come in!
I am beyond thrilled to have finally joined this group. After reading Unscripted last year, I started looking at the world through a difference lens. I was repulsed by my environment Mon-Fri, and I felt like everyone I worked with was a mindless zombie; but, for some crazy reason, I still wasn't all that interested in joining this forum. After meeting many of you in Scottsdale, I felt honored and humbled. And after my experience the other night with my girlfriends, I can honestly say that I am finally ready to see what this community is all about.
Full disclosure: I am not my husband. He is technical, task-oriented, and incredibly organized. I am his detail-obsessed, emotion-driven, highly interpersonal counterpart. I like to think that I am creative, insightful, and honest. I am often the leader amongst my friends, and I am definitely the leader amongst my siblings. I am passionate about the art of storytelling in the form of literature, theatre, or music; and I believe that a healthy lifestyle is one of mental and physical balance. I am most eager to discuss branding and marketing strategies, but I am also looking to get out of my comfort zone and dive into topics that I know little to nothing about. I think that I bring a lot to the table, but I know that I have so much to learn. Let the growing begin!
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