Spot BS: Post your favorite MLM pitch...

[Ninjakid]

Have you guys ever noticed that people in MLM's never say exactly what they are?

Like they will call it "entrepreneurship" or "sales" or "mentorship" and give you some cockamamey explanation about how it works, but they will NEVER call it multi-level marketing.

No I don't hate them, like I don't hate anyone. I just find them incredibly cringworthy and would rather they stay 100 feet away from me at all times.

 

[SPEEDratRACER]

Them: How would you like to make your weekly salary for 1 hour of work?
Me: How do I do that?
Them: Call all of your friends, family, and everyone you ever meet and we will show them a simple presentation.
Me: What if they say no?
Them: Don't worry, we will teach you how to be a sleazy bastard.
Me: Great sign me up!
Them: That will be $100

 

[MJ DeMarco]

claiming they want to help people but really they just want to rip you off.

Most MLM people aren't ripping people off. They genuinely want to help others with their delusions of passive income fortunes. False premises yields false actions, not necessarily deception or ripping people off. And therein lies the problem: These folks actually think they're evangelizing for something new or novel.

 

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[CommonCents]

We are in a multi billion dollar industry!

 

[Rawr]

Huge flags:


"These are everyday products everyone needs!"

"You could easily make money when you sell them to your friends and family!"

and, always, always the main one for me:

"You just need to buy this sample /pay an entry fee"




I just got a message from a GF who was pitched. When she gave me the "you could sell this to your friends" I said. "GF, this is how you'd lose all your friends"


Never ever pitch this shit to friends, their parents, and family. Chances are they've heard this before from at least 1 other person already.

 

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[Tony I]

Well it first starts with a friend calling your phone 7 times in a row to ask you to about "a business they just started".

Then comes the pitch;

1. I'm building a team and we are going to make "bank"

2. All you do is sell a product to your friends, easy passive income!

3. Robert Kiyosaki recommends MLM! (Wait, the same guy that gets kick-backs from MLM companies? The same guy who got rich by writing a book on how to get rich?

4. Dr OZ. recommends the product!

And If you refuse to join:

1. Your too close-minded. Your gonna miss the opportunity.
2. Ok, you'll see me driving around in a brand new (rented) BMW then.

These people have a scripted sales pitch, its pathetic. They even get a "success guide" to ensure they become rich...

 

[JEdwards]

MLMs are the definition of a dead end sales job.

Not really, I would take a dead end sales job over an MLM anyday as I woudl have a better chance to get paid.

Ends up being an MLM pitching nightmare and not an actual legit networking event / party. :cuss: issed: :bgh:

Since most networking parties are just people trying to sell you something also, insurance, printing etc. I would not go to one of those either.

 

[RHL]

I hope you stick around.

Don't worry. TMF came at just the right time for me, a time when I was already starting to realize the cracks in slow-lane fiscal strategy (why was my dad, a brilliant man from a universally highly motivated family, the only one of his three brothers to go to graduate school, and to Wharton no less, but also the only one that wasn't a millionaire? Why were people with far better jobs and double my income struggling financially while I powered out of my student loan debt and now have tons of financial security?). Although the analogy has been weakened by the number of people who've co-opted it, the Matrix-pill thing is pretty apt. Once you start seeing the world this way, once you realize that sidewalking is a mentality and not an income level (one of the best points in TMF , IMO) and that time is the only resource that can't be exponentially multiplied (you can earn five billion dollars, but five trillion dollars won't help you live even 150 years, let alone the thousands of years it would take to slow lane your way to fastlane freedom. I think I'll be sticking around.

 

[Roli]

Had I raved (lied) about MLM in TMF , I would have sold a hell of lot more books.

I'm bloody glad you didn't! I wouldn't be here now, and I wouldn't have gained all the wonderful benefits from being a member. I give you a very sincere thank you for not selling out.

 

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[amp0193]

I think RD/PD is massively overrated. It's not even real - Kiyosaki didn't have 'two dads' like he claimed in the book and the co-author sued his a$$ too.

Rich Dad = Robert Kiyosaki. Poor Dad = any dad who bought the book.

Whether or not it was real or fiction, and the controversy surrounding it, it communicated fastlane ideas in an accessible way to the mainstream.

I likely wouldn't be where I am if that book hadn't got me thinking differently years ago.

 

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[amp0193]

In the 3rd class, they teach people that they should bring their friends aboard because awakening others' potentials is how you awaken yours even further.

At some point, it becomes a cult.

 

[Iammelissamoore]

The gentleman who came hoping to recruit me went through his presentation and even 'guaranteed' me that I will make a whole lot of money, his exact words,
"Trust me, you will make a whole lot of money, there are millionaires who travel the world that built their fortunes from this."

Needless to say, he was a member for over a year, drove a super old, beaten up vehicle and wore a pair of eyeglasses which was held up on one side with a make-shift piece of wire, which he attempted to mould as the handle to rest on his ear so it would sit properly on his face.

Now, don't get me wrong about the super old, beaten up vehicle part - I have absolutely no problem there, but eyeglasses, I don't know anyone "who travel the world that built their fortunes" who'd do that to themselves.

Clearly, him being in the MLM for over a year prove fruitless and was an immediate injustice to anyone who joined a team with him as their "mentor/upline".

 

[TheNewRich]

I don't know whats worse... MLM or people like Tanner J Fox claiming he's making a mill+ from 1.5 years on Amazon FBA

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjXKRwV7Dss
Himself and a Guy named Ryan Hildreth. They've already mastered the stock market and Wall street day trading,
Affiliate marketing, and Social Media Marketing selling courses for it all.

I swear they just buy courses like Tais and re-word the shit...

 

[Zhukovic]

I'll bite.

As a recovering MLM/cult member, I was told to say stuff like this;

"We help mentor select individuals in life, including how to step away into early retirement, pay off their debts, travel the world, grow spiritually, and help their marriages."
"I work with some local entrepreneurs who've helped me and my wife step away from our corporate jobs into earlier retirement"

If asked what exactly I did, I was instructed to say;

"Don't get the wrong idea, but I get the feeling what you mean to ask is "how" do I achieve the results that I do? In all honestly, what I do doesn't fit into any 'box' and frankly, most people need to go through an interview and qualification process before they are ready to earn that information."

They would go on to say, and this is true, that we require people to go through an "interview and qualification" process between 6-8 weeks before they could sign up in our MLM. It was all about leadership, mentorship, and weeding out people in an attempt to have members that stayed longer and were more loyal.

In the end, it was really just brainwashing, but dressed up so well in the leadership/mentorship/entrepreneurship crowd that it becomes a cult that keeps people in for years instead of months.

They've been growing like weeds across US and Canada in the past few years.

 

[dknise]

Easy as 1..2..3!



123 of what? Steps, Situps, Sail boat trips around the world?

1) sign here
2) credit card number here
3) submit button right here

 

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[RHL]

I always feel kinda bad for them. I've never met a smart or socially mobile person in MLM. I'm sure they must be in there, near the top, but the peons are always the most world-weary helpless rubes who've ever lived.

 

[Likwid24]

I SWEAR. It's not a pyramid scheme!

 

[MJ DeMarco]

A couple years ago my FB feed was blowing up with this company.

Now I'm seeing a feed full of disgruntled distributors and even "MLM gurus" taking swipes at this company.

Turns out, it's just another MLM fighting to stay alive...

If you read the parent company's quarterly report, let the numbers do the talking.

http://www.marketwatch.com/story/blyth-inc-reports-2nd-quarter-2014-sales-and-earnings-2014-08-01

In the Health & Wellness segment, ViSalus's second quarter net sales were $53.6 million versus $101.5 million for the same period last year, a decline of 47%, largely reflecting the reduced promoter base in North America. At the end of the second quarter, qualified independent North American promoters totaled approximately 28,700 versus approximately 36,100 at the end of the first quarter, and approximately 57,200 at the end of the prior year's second quarter.

47% revenue decline.
Nearly 50% distributor decline.

To quote the old 80s movie, War Games folks, the only winning move [in MLM] is not to play at all. And yet, I'm sure there will be thousands of people salivating to climb aboard a sinking ship.

Class actions to spice it up as well.

http://www.digitaljournal.com/pr/2051098

 

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[mws87]

Posted to my Facebook Inbox...

1. I don't post on FB everyday. In fact, the last status update I made was probably mid to late last year. Strike #1
2. Rodan + Fields is a skin care line. Hmmm, sounds perfect for a middle-age man! Strike #2
3. My positive and magnetic personality? Based on my ZERO posts I've made in the last year? Based on having spoken/conversed with you exactly ZERO times? Strike #3.
4. I wrote a lengthy diatribe in my book crucifying MLM (Re: Direct Sales business) -- again, why the f*ck would I want to join you? And do you truly know anything about me other than being a warm body to fill your lead funnel? Strike #4: Not get back to the bench and try again.

These people are pathetic. And no, I have no clue who this person was who messaged me.

But, MJ! His products are probably the revolutionary compounds found in the Dead Sea! Come on!

At least he didn't ask you for money to rescue the first Nigerian astronaut who's been lost in space since the 90's.

 

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[GuitarManDan]

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JyKt8_ZLxUg

 

[SYK]

All time doozy of a response this week...

"What do you do?"
"I help entrepreneurs move from active to passive income"
"Huh? How do you that?"
"Kind of like Robert Kiyosaki teaches"
"Yeah but how?"
"We have 3000-4000 products..."
"Ohhh... so it's network marketing?"
"Yeah! You know it?"
"I've got to go now..."

 

[Deleted74925]

A guy who knew my parents 20 years ago called me the other day.

He said that he spent his career as a physical therapist and now that he was nearing retirement (almost 60) he had decided that it was time to "start making serious money".

He discovered this opportunity for helping people plan for their financial future and build wealth.

His company helped high net worth individuals by selling them life insurance annuity products... or something like that. He was very vague in explaining what services he actually sold. Our conversation ended when he asked me to be on a zoom call -- with my wife present (if I was married) so that I would be ready to make a financial commitment.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

A male nurse that was taking care of me after I was gutted like a fish and almost dead from Crohn's disease decided it would be a good idea to tell me about these "natural pills" that have a "modifiable crystal cell" (whatever that was supposed to mean), and said it could cure my incurable disease.

He was very adamant about their effectiveness and supposed "EU approved" status.

I knew where this was going right from the start, but I humored him anyway and listened to what he had to say.

Apparently, he had already sold quite a few to other patients and was receiving a commission.

After he left, I did a quick Google search and I managed to find a forum where people decided to test these "pills" in a lab - 100% sugar.

And on their website, all I could find was junk science.

As I was leaving the hospital a week later, I thanked the dude for caring for me and told him that this was a dangerous game he'd been playing and that this company is FAR from legitimate, no matter what they told him.

P.S. As concerning as this story may sound, please do be aware that doctors and surgeons do the exact same thing on a regular basis on a much larger scale with drugs way more harmless than a gram of

How has the EU not shut that down? Or that guy getting fired? Subversively Using your health care job to prescribe pills is is the lowest of lows for these MLM wanks.

 

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[dknise]

x) Don't worry about the details now, just sign up and start getting product to familiarize yourself with them. You'll understand in time.

x) Come to our convention this weekend, the top seller in our state will be there where we will be worshipping him and jumping up and down screaming like Tom Cruise on Oprah.



On a side note... don't hurt me.
My personal mentor is extremely high up in Amway haha.

 

[liquidglass]

2. Ok, you'll see me driving around in a brand new (rented) BMW then.

Please don't forget that as soon as the MLM goes under they have to keep making lease payments on their BMW! Because they signed the contract, not the company! If a company is going to give me a car it will be paid in F*cking full.

 

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[dknise]

I've got a story from Tuesday!

The girl I've been seeing was messaged by a friend to see if she was interested in a lucrative business opportunity if she wanted to come over at 8:30 to check it out. As soon as she got off the phone I said:

1) Omg it's going to be MLM
2) They're going to claim it's not MLM
3) It's going to be at a very large house with free water and food
4) The "business" is going to be extremely vague
5) No matter what the product is, they will never reveal a straight answer on what your sales margins are
6) Their documentation will be filled with fine print, errors, and contradictions


So, we show up because I thought it would be interesting, and sure enough it was for ACN. http://acninc.com/

I had never heard of this business before, but they pretty much are just a lead generation platform that contracts out services to big, reputable companies.

1) It's MLM.
2) No it's not MLM, it's "Relationship Marketing"
3) It was at a large house a few blocks from the main Microsoft campus in Redmond, WA, with a mid 90's Lexus parked in the driveway. I laughed.
4) We watched an extremely cheesy, green screened sales video for it telling us more about the business than the services that are offered. They kept revert to Donald Trump talking about how he's a billionaire and backs ACN. Ever stayed at the Taj Mahal in Atlantic City? The parking garage feels like it's going to collapse and if it's wood or marble it's fake haha. Shittiest hotel I've ever stayed at in my life, but I guess that's how Trump does his business.

Not only was the video vague, but the discussion after and their sheet of paper was even more vague. They offer services like: Phone Services, Wireless, Merchant Services, House Services. I have no idea what paying for wireless means and none of them knew exactly what they meant either.

5) On top of that, NOTHING had margins! "You'll make between 1-10% on every sale!" Then had every earnings report calculated based on 10%. For the 58 services they offer, 57 of them could have a 1% commission and the "wireless" service that nobody could identify meaning nobody can sell it is the only one with a 10% commission haha.
6) The monthly bonuses were listed in huge print. Fine print says it's based on a percentage of the regional bonus pool and only calculated based off of new growth hire's sales during their first month. Basically, unless you land a guy who pulls in $250k in sales his first month, you're not getting that bonus.



My favorite part of the whole hour was explaining to them that the marketing budgets don't get transferred back to the IBO's in this case. At Amway, they have their own products and put forth their marketing budget back to the IBO's. At ACN, the service providers they sell for are all extremely well branded, big names. It is NOT the same model haha.

Running with that, I was interested in what their pricing was considering they offered your everyday service providers who I even use. My guess was that their prices were not competitive because of the added cost of sales acquisition on top of their existing marketing budget. How many of the 58 services they were selling do you think they had prices for? Not. One.


TLDR, went to MLM pitch, we laughed and we cried, and had a really really really good time.

 

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[Lauryn]

I've done a few MLMs when I was younger. And direct sales too. (Remember the Olympia Sales Club for kids?)
One of the most annoying pitches I get is the "It didn't work because you didn't try hard enough":

Example - based on real experience:
=========================


Mary Kay Drone: "You can make a lot of money with Mary Kay."

Me: "Nope. I've tried it, and while the products are cool, there are plenty of saleswomen and the market is saturated. I'm just not interested in it."

Mary Kay Drone: "You didn't have any success when you were a Mary Kay rep?"

Me: "Nope. Everybody and their mother was already selling it."

Mary Kay: "Yes we're the number one company for women in America, but there's always room for growth and expansion. I find it hard to believe that you weren't successful. You probably didn't try hard enough."

Me: *turning hot under the collar* "Excuse me? Yes, I did."

Mary Kay Drone: "I don't think so. Anyone can be successful with this company. You didn't have a good experience because you didn't give it enough effort."

At that point, you WON'T get my attention, my respect or any of my patience.

 

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[Kak]

MLMs are the definition of a dead end sales job.

 

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[Ronnie]

Not really a failure sales pitch but I witnessed the darkside of MLM.

My old Criminal Justice teacher from high school got pitched and hooked by one of his former students to attend a Primerica meeting. He attended, signed up, made a decent amount of money his first couple of months then QUIT his day job. Yes he quit his teacher job to work full time for Primerica. Long story short, the Primerica sales stopped coming in and his wife and kids ended up leaving him.

It's really sad how these companies brainwash these people to believe in a side walk "business opportunity."

 

[Griffith]

"Oh he makes 100,000...a month" (pause and emphasis lol)

There's always That One Guy who's just killing it...That One Guy who's probably the reason they got hooked into that MLM.

That One Guy probably never existed.

 

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