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NOTABLE! If you could only pass on one life lesson to everyone on this forum, what would it be?

handog

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No matter where you're at at this moment - there's always the next level.

Keep learning, being curious and asking questions. You never know what you don't know until you make yourself find out.
 

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Colibri

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"Some people die at 25 and aren't buried until 75." - Benjamin Franklin

Your most precious resource is time. Cherish every second that passes, make it a priority to do the things that matter to you, and constantly seek progress in all aspects of your life.

(and bookmark this thread. As @Prakhar Verma said, life lessons have a different impact on you depending on where you are on your life journey.)
 

CalinPop

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I had tried to meditate so many times. And my brain goes something like I try to hold a big live fish in my hands, thanks all for the advice I will read Sam Harris page and also The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle recommended here
Thanks
 

Joaquim

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Focus more on things that change very, very slowly or not at all.
 

EnvisionEd

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"Some people die at 25 and aren't buried until 75." - Benjamin Franklin

Your most precious resource is time. Cherish every second that passes, make it a priority to do the things that matter to you, and constantly seek progress in all aspects of your life.

(and bookmark this thread. As @Prakhar Verma said, life lessons have a different impact on you depending on where you are on your life journey.)
I was hoping to see someone put something like this. My advice is similar to yours: Enjoy the Ride. Put another way, be in the moment. All you have is the present moment, so be in it with people, with your work and your play. Mindfulness is a great thing.
 

Davesells

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Never take financial advice from someone who is more broke than you!

When it comes to financial advice I like to get it from someone that has a proven track record because if someone knew how to make a million dollars they most likely would be making a million dollars not just giving advice on how to do it.
 

JAVB

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I love this! Thank you for sharing!

If I could pass on one life lesson it would be: Be Genuine

Being genuine has helped me in my personal and professional lives. People can easily see if you are trying to be something that you are not.

I started working as a real estate agent 5 years ago. When I started I was trying to be someone I wasn't. When I started being genuine and true to myself my business took off.
What do you mean? I'm also a Real Estate Agent and I'm trying to improve my business. One of the things that I've found difficult is not feeling identified with other RE agents. Real Estate is plagued with people trying to make "extra money on the side" / Multi-level sales Amway kind of people.
 

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Jon Anthony

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What you will learn in 15 years could be learnt in 6 months if you have a guide/mentor to show you the way.
Came here to say this. Having mentors is so F*cking critical.

All of the major leaps in my financial success, health success, and relationships success, have been because I found mentors, and avidly applied what I learned from them.

Mentors will literally 10x your results in 1/2 the time.
 

LoveLife

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LOVE.

Funny, nobody talked about it! No one. Hahaha

Love is simple but probably the most difficult thing to do properly. Because to love is to practice loving and to love the unlovable.

Why Love is important?! I let you guess. :)

Oh, thanks Mr.C for the thread and what you said. 21 and so much knowledge/wisdom, wow!
 

BaraQueenbee

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I thought this might make for an interesting thread, in the vein of some other very valuable "lessons learned" threads we've seen here down through the years.

No two people on this forum have lived their lives in precisely the same way.
Sure, some of us have a lot more experience than others (at 21, I'm younger than a lot of you reading this), but I believe that everyone has a message to share - they just need a platform...

So, here's your platform.

I'll kick things off.

If I could only pass on one lesson to you, it'd be this:

You are not your thoughts.

Trite? Perhaps.

But powerful? Definitely.

One of the principal benefits you get from meditating is learning to exist in the space between stimulus and response. Between the impulse and action, you have a chance to observe what's happening and make an informed decision, rather than reacting in a knee-jerk fashion.

In business, we see people holding themselves back from ever even trying because they think that they're not good enough, that they're a failure, that they need to read these 16 books and listen to those 27 podcasts and subscribe to all those email lists first...

But these thoughts are just that.
Thoughts.
Nothing more than a cloud drifting across the sky of your conscious awareness. They are not who you are... unless you reach out, cling to them, and make them part of your identity.

Why do I know this?

(Warning - possible overshare incoming)

Back in late 2017, not for the first time in my life, I went through a bad mental health spell. Compulsive thoughts were nagging, nagging, nagging away at me. Without getting too detailed (that's not what this post is about), I was constantly fighting the urge to hurt myself physically... and worse.

At my lowest, I was having these thoughts 50-60 times a day, and I didn't really know what to do about it. Counselling was an idea, but I ended up on a two-week waiting list once they felt I wasn't an immediate risk.

By the time I got a call to say an appointment was available, the worst had passed, and I was on the way back up again... but I knew I had to be better prepared the next time around. For my own sake.

Weeks went by, and I reflected on the questions I'd been left with:
How can I overcome this challenge?
How can I ensure that I don't suffer from one of these bad spells again?
How do I know it won't be worse next time?

Journaling. Reading. Talking to people (professionals and otherwise). All played a part, and all helped to a degree...

But what helped me most was reflecting back on my experience during that bad spell, as painful as it was. In seeing how I had kept going then, I could learn to do so again in the future.

And there, in the midst of all that I wished to forget, I found the one truth that could save me.

I was not my thoughts.


Every impulse, every nagging image, every compulsive desire that rose up in me was not who I was.

This isn't dissociation. Running away from this kind of problem doesn't help (believe me, I tried).

This is about realizing your thoughts are a stimulus. Your response can be provoked by this stimulus... but only you choose what that response will be.

You can agree (if it serves you), or you can decline (if it doesn't). The choice is yours.

(Note: Please don't take any of this as victim-shaming, or trivialization of serious mental health issues. This is serious business, I understand that. This is just a mental framework that has helped me, among other things.)

I still get these thoughts sometimes (not as often), but they don't have the same power over me that they once did.

When they float up now, I recognize them for what they are - a stimulus, and nothing more.

You are not your thoughts. Thoughts are a stimulus, and your response is your own.


*******

Looking forward to seeing the lessons you all have to share!
Thank you for openly sharing your vulnerable experience and lessons.
Did you happen to come across the Machick's Complete Explanation method? I got that feeling a bit from reading it.
Which is an amazing method and I hope many would know about it!

As to what my lesson would be:
If you feel fear, that's ok.
Be afraid and take action anyway.

Great thread, thank you!
 
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Mr.C

Mr.C

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Thank you for openly sharing your vulnerable experience and lessons.
Did you happen to come across the Machick's Complete Explanation method? I got that feeling a bit from reading it.
Which is an amazing method and I hope many would know about it!

As to what my lesson would be:
If you feel fear, that's ok.
Be afraid and take action anyway.

Great thread, thank you!
I haven't come across that method before, but thanks for mentioning it - hopefully it'll be of benefit to others who come across this thread in the future.

Thanks to all for their contributions so far - some very valuable wisdom being shared!
 
D

Deleted34902

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Most people try to figure out every single step to get to a desired goal.

You do not need to know every single step, all you need to do is decide on a goal and set a date by when you want to achieve it.

Look 5 feet in front of you, do not get overwhelmed by looking at the end goal.

You must have a destination so you know where you are going.

If you don't have an end destination, it's like getting into a car without any idea of where you are going.

Instead, hop in the car, set your GPS to your end destination, and then focus on the 5 feet of road in front of you.

1) Decide what you want
2) Next to the goal write a date by when you want to achieve it
3) Read this goal every morning and night
4) Take action

One of my favorite quotes:
To get what you want you have to deserve what you want - Charlie Munger
 

Kevin88660

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This is what I found to be the most important thing over the years. We live in an age of internet when it is easy to get really good information and advice.

Yet most people, including many in the self-help/motivational groups are not reaching their full potential, for the very simple good old fashion reason-not pushing themselves hard enough.

There are only three ways that humans get pushed to reach their potential. Strong desire. Pointing a gun at their head. Being nut.

The most ineffective way is through wants, desires and rewards. Because you have to take massive pain and sacrifice now! Which itself its a contradiction in the rationale mind. Most of us live in developed countries. Visualising six abs get you excited, but so what if you dont have. Visualizing a million dollar in the bank account is nice, but is it worth the painstaking nights, months and years of hustle when you are not starving now? When you try to rationalise the joy of massive success, you inevitablely face the objection of pain and comes to the rationale conclusion of giving up every now and then.

The second way that is more useful is to get someone to point a gun at your head. It will work. It is not a pleasant experience. And I am not sure on how to set up the arrangement.

The third way which I believe is more pleasant than the second way, is to develop a personality, value and identity that is more obsessive and sadist than the average guy. I use the words obsessive and sadist to call a spade a spade. Most successful people are born with it. They are hyper competative and have low threshhold for actions (always trying). These are not normal values or behaviour and thats why success is rare. Look at Mark Cuban, Travis Kalanick and Steve Jobs. Once you developed the personality, value and identity it is very difficult to be lazy. You find joys in the hustle like how a bodybuilder learns to be in love with fatigue and pain. You find massive pains when you competitors is kicking your a$$ (even when you are already rich). A military guy can accept that a batch of honor is worth a one whole week of pain in a hell week, and if you can rationalise that, it would be much easier to rationalise how working your a$$ off infront of a laptop in a much more cosy environment for more money makes far more sense and not worth bitching about!
 

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Lee H

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My 1 lesson:

Wealth is a result not a goal. It is a result of success. Success comes from helping as many other people/entities as you can. If you have a job, you're only helping one person/entity - your boss/employer. So look how you can help as many people as possible and stop chasing money, it will only make you miserable!
 

Dustin Cleveland

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Mar 6, 2019
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I thought this might make for an interesting thread, in the vein of some other very valuable "lessons learned" threads we've seen here down through the years.

No two people on this forum have lived their lives in precisely the same way.
Sure, some of us have a lot more experience than others (at 21, I'm younger than a lot of you reading this), but I believe that everyone has a message to share - they just need a platform...

So, here's your platform.

I'll kick things off.

If I could only pass on one lesson to you, it'd be this:

You are not your thoughts.

Trite? Perhaps.

But powerful? Definitely.

One of the principal benefits you get from meditating is learning to exist in the space between stimulus and response. Between the impulse and action, you have a chance to observe what's happening and make an informed decision, rather than reacting in a knee-jerk fashion.

In business, we see people holding themselves back from ever even trying because they think that they're not good enough, that they're a failure, that they need to read these 16 books and listen to those 27 podcasts and subscribe to all those email lists first...

But these thoughts are just that.
Thoughts.
Nothing more than a cloud drifting across the sky of your conscious awareness. They are not who you are... unless you reach out, cling to them, and make them part of your identity.

Why do I know this?

(Warning - possible overshare incoming)

Back in late 2017, not for the first time in my life, I went through a bad mental health spell. Compulsive thoughts were nagging, nagging, nagging away at me. Without getting too detailed (that's not what this post is about), I was constantly fighting the urge to hurt myself physically... and worse.

At my lowest, I was having these thoughts 50-60 times a day, and I didn't really know what to do about it. Counselling was an idea, but I ended up on a two-week waiting list once they felt I wasn't an immediate risk.

By the time I got a call to say an appointment was available, the worst had passed, and I was on the way back up again... but I knew I had to be better prepared the next time around. For my own sake.

Weeks went by, and I reflected on the questions I'd been left with:
How can I overcome this challenge?
How can I ensure that I don't suffer from one of these bad spells again?
How do I know it won't be worse next time?

Journaling. Reading. Talking to people (professionals and otherwise). All played a part, and all helped to a degree...

But what helped me most was reflecting back on my experience during that bad spell, as painful as it was. In seeing how I had kept going then, I could learn to do so again in the future.

And there, in the midst of all that I wished to forget, I found the one truth that could save me.

I was not my thoughts.


Every impulse, every nagging image, every compulsive desire that rose up in me was not who I was.

This isn't dissociation. Running away from this kind of problem doesn't help (believe me, I tried).

This is about realizing your thoughts are a stimulus. Your response can be provoked by this stimulus... but only you choose what that response will be.

You can agree (if it serves you), or you can decline (if it doesn't). The choice is yours.

(Note: Please don't take any of this as victim-shaming, or trivialization of serious mental health issues. This is serious business, I understand that. This is just a mental framework that has helped me, among other things.)

I still get these thoughts sometimes (not as often), but they don't have the same power over me that they once did.

When they float up now, I recognize them for what they are - a stimulus, and nothing more.

You are not your thoughts. Thoughts are a stimulus, and your response is your own.


*******

Looking forward to seeing the lessons you all have to share!
Hi I am new here. Eager to connect with like-minded people.
 

redplant

Contributor
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I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Aug 5, 2018
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I thought this might make for an interesting thread, in the vein of some other very valuable "lessons learned" threads we've seen here down through the years.

No two people on this forum have lived their lives in precisely the same way.
Sure, some of us have a lot more experience than others (at 21, I'm younger than a lot of you reading this), but I believe that everyone has a message to share - they just need a platform...

So, here's your platform.

I'll kick things off.

If I could only pass on one lesson to you, it'd be this:

You are not your thoughts.

Trite? Perhaps.

But powerful? Definitely.

One of the principal benefits you get from meditating is learning to exist in the space between stimulus and response. Between the impulse and action, you have a chance to observe what's happening and make an informed decision, rather than reacting in a knee-jerk fashion.

In business, we see people holding themselves back from ever even trying because they think that they're not good enough, that they're a failure, that they need to read these 16 books and listen to those 27 podcasts and subscribe to all those email lists first...

But these thoughts are just that.
Thoughts.
Nothing more than a cloud drifting across the sky of your conscious awareness. They are not who you are... unless you reach out, cling to them, and make them part of your identity.

Why do I know this?

(Warning - possible overshare incoming)

Back in late 2017, not for the first time in my life, I went through a bad mental health spell. Compulsive thoughts were nagging, nagging, nagging away at me. Without getting too detailed (that's not what this post is about), I was constantly fighting the urge to hurt myself physically... and worse.

At my lowest, I was having these thoughts 50-60 times a day, and I didn't really know what to do about it. Counselling was an idea, but I ended up on a two-week waiting list once they felt I wasn't an immediate risk.

By the time I got a call to say an appointment was available, the worst had passed, and I was on the way back up again... but I knew I had to be better prepared the next time around. For my own sake.

Weeks went by, and I reflected on the questions I'd been left with:
How can I overcome this challenge?
How can I ensure that I don't suffer from one of these bad spells again?
How do I know it won't be worse next time?

Journaling. Reading. Talking to people (professionals and otherwise). All played a part, and all helped to a degree...

But what helped me most was reflecting back on my experience during that bad spell, as painful as it was. In seeing how I had kept going then, I could learn to do so again in the future.

And there, in the midst of all that I wished to forget, I found the one truth that could save me.

I was not my thoughts.


Every impulse, every nagging image, every compulsive desire that rose up in me was not who I was.

This isn't dissociation. Running away from this kind of problem doesn't help (believe me, I tried).

This is about realizing your thoughts are a stimulus. Your response can be provoked by this stimulus... but only you choose what that response will be.

You can agree (if it serves you), or you can decline (if it doesn't). The choice is yours.

(Note: Please don't take any of this as victim-shaming, or trivialization of serious mental health issues. This is serious business, I understand that. This is just a mental framework that has helped me, among other things.)

I still get these thoughts sometimes (not as often), but they don't have the same power over me that they once did.

When they float up now, I recognize them for what they are - a stimulus, and nothing more.

You are not your thoughts. Thoughts are a stimulus, and your response is your own.


*******

Looking forward to seeing the lessons you all have to share!
I can relate to this. I used to fall prey to my obsessive thoughts and the compulsions to stop them -- usually by doing some inane rituals. You could say I have a bit of an OCD, but I've not been clinically diagnosed.

Anyway, the best thing is really to recognize that these thoughts and emotions don't define you. You always have a choice whether to act on them or not. I think, at this point, this is also the one lesson that I'd tell everyone here in the forum.

The good thing about this lesson is it allows you to have tremendous control over your influences. By recognizing that your some of your thoughts are not real, you can easily choose to let them go, not act on them.

Of course, I still struggle with this sometimes, especially with my fears, but it's easier to wait for the storm to pass when you know it eventually would.
 

Dmoneyzzz

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Failure is paramount to success! You cannot truly experience and appreciate success until you have failed (totally my opinion). Some try to avoid failure and believe this is the way to go. I would pass on the lesson to seek ways in which you can fail, so that you may know what does not work & also what else to try in order to get different results.
 

LinorCG

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This just struck a chord in me - "Passion is expected, passion is now a norm. So whats the next level after passion then? Obsession!"
 

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