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NOTABLE! If you could only pass on one life lesson to everyone on this forum, what would it be?

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Kevin88660

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I can guarantee you ... Warren Buffett could EASILY rope in more hot women than I could ever hope to do in a lifetime.

You think Melania thought Donald Trump was hot? Or the playboy bunnies thought Hugh was a stud? Nope. Money changes everything.

I'm not saying all those other qualities are meaningless. They are all well and good. And can only serve to enhance your attractiveness.

But when it comes to attracting women ... cash is king.

And, for the record, I have nothing against "gold diggers." I think "gold diggers" are smart entrepreneurs. You might be amazed what "marrying" your way into the fastlane can do for your standard of living. More power to them.
Ya I agree.

It is funny that people think that money is just a number sitting in the bank account. It is not.

Power fame and status versus money? Not much difference. Famous and powerful people are rarely poor in a capitalist economy. All the politician and celebrities we know have minimally medium 8 digits net worth. In fact having money alone, even if you are not famous is a form of status, probably the best form depending on your perspective.

Let us talk about behavior and charisma.
9 out of ten times a person with money also wins. Because it takes a lot of discipline and drive to become a first generation wealthy person. Sometimes they might be full of themselves also. But let me assure you they have plenty of charisma and attractive behaviors.

And I have news for some people here. Most wealthy people below the age of 40 are not the first generations wealth creator. This doesnt mean that they did nothing commendable. This is a fact of life. Trump is a third generation property developer. Trump is a capable person too. They also win in charisma and behavior. Having not to worry about money since young gives you the ability to develop the charisma that average dudes wont have a chance.

Basically these rich descendants will either develop personalities like
-Charismatic assholes like trump who is like able in many aspects. (Ya I know some would hate him).
-Charismatic prince who knows literature, music, wine and art. These are the socially acceptable “perfect gentleman”.

And let us talk about relationships. A lot of the money seeking behavior isn't about getting the guy to spend money on her in the future. It is about marrying someone who is “worthy of themselves”.
Even rich ladies and upper middle class family background ladies are quite reluctant to marry a poorer but good looking dude. Self-made compatible dude or 2nd gen compatibles dudes are still first choice.
 

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Pinnacle

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I thought this might make for an interesting thread, in the vein of some other very valuable "lessons learned" threads we've seen here down through the years.

No two people on this forum have lived their lives in precisely the same way.
Sure, some of us have a lot more experience than others (at 21, I'm younger than a lot of you reading this), but I believe that everyone has a message to share - they just need a platform...

So, here's your platform.

I'll kick things off.

If I could only pass on one lesson to you, it'd be this:

You are not your thoughts.

Trite? Perhaps.

But powerful? Definitely.

One of the principal benefits you get from meditating is learning to exist in the space between stimulus and response. Between the impulse and action, you have a chance to observe what's happening and make an informed decision, rather than reacting in a knee-jerk fashion.

In business, we see people holding themselves back from ever even trying because they think that they're not good enough, that they're a failure, that they need to read these 16 books and listen to those 27 podcasts and subscribe to all those email lists first...

But these thoughts are just that.
Thoughts.
Nothing more than a cloud drifting across the sky of your conscious awareness. They are not who you are... unless you reach out, cling to them, and make them part of your identity.

Why do I know this?

(Warning - possible overshare incoming)

Back in late 2017, not for the first time in my life, I went through a bad mental health spell. Compulsive thoughts were nagging, nagging, nagging away at me. Without getting too detailed (that's not what this post is about), I was constantly fighting the urge to hurt myself physically... and worse.

At my lowest, I was having these thoughts 50-60 times a day, and I didn't really know what to do about it. Counselling was an idea, but I ended up on a two-week waiting list once they felt I wasn't an immediate risk.

By the time I got a call to say an appointment was available, the worst had passed, and I was on the way back up again... but I knew I had to be better prepared the next time around. For my own sake.

Weeks went by, and I reflected on the questions I'd been left with:
How can I overcome this challenge?
How can I ensure that I don't suffer from one of these bad spells again?
How do I know it won't be worse next time?

Journaling. Reading. Talking to people (professionals and otherwise). All played a part, and all helped to a degree...

But what helped me most was reflecting back on my experience during that bad spell, as painful as it was. In seeing how I had kept going then, I could learn to do so again in the future.

And there, in the midst of all that I wished to forget, I found the one truth that could save me.

I was not my thoughts.

Every impulse, every nagging image, every compulsive desire that rose up in me was not who I was.

This isn't dissociation. Running away from this kind of problem doesn't help (believe me, I tried).

This is about realizing your thoughts are a stimulus. Your response can be provoked by this stimulus... but only you choose what that response will be.

You can agree (if it serves you), or you can decline (if it doesn't). The choice is yours.

(Note: Please don't take any of this as victim-shaming, or trivialization of serious mental health issues. This is serious business, I understand that. This is just a mental framework that has helped me, among other things.)

I still get these thoughts sometimes (not as often), but they don't have the same power over me that they once did.

When they float up now, I recognize them for what they are - a stimulus, and nothing more.

You are not your thoughts. Thoughts are a stimulus, and your response is your own.

*******

Looking forward to seeing the lessons you all have to share!
You ARE worthy.
 

Harti

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Feel all your feelings, unconditionally. They will transform your life from the inside out.
 

Chitown

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No one's coming to your rescue.

Therefor, you gotta do it yourself and F*ck what other people think about it.
A -frickin' - men! I found out this truism when I was homeless. You want to have your "real" friends revealed to you? Fall on your a$$ for a while...you quickly find out who's been throwing rocks at you when the lights come on in the cave.
 

Chitown

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I would impart this..."Don't be afraid to step out of your comfort zone to pursue an opportunity, especially in your 20's."

An associate of mine who lived in Harlem in the early 1990's advised me to grab a derelict brownstone - for less than $100,000 - in his neighborhood. I declined, giving my constant travel as an actor as the excuse which precluded me from being an effective property man.

I made a boneheaded decision. But, if I'm being honest, being a property owner never even crossed my mind. I didn't know any fastlaners from whom I could get any advice - that would've been great. However, in hindsight, I don't beat up myself the way I used to. When you don't know what you don't know...

Today, that neighborhood is priced in the mid-seven figures. I don't want my sons to be as blind to opportunities as I was. My wife and I plan to home school them and traveling the world will be part of their education. I want my boys to be aware of everything that is available to them so when they hit their twenties, they'll be a lot farther along than I was. My two cents...:smile2:
 

WJK

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I would say --" this too shall pass". Life has seasons and there's a season for everything that happens or fails to happen. Sometimes you must simply wait for the right time to move forward. It's a deliberate act of quietly standing still -- a pause. Sometimes you can't stop for anything along the way without losing yourself. Understand that this moment in the here-and-now is just that -- it's only one tiny ping in a long, long life of many moments. Get quiet and listen to the natural music with your heart. Feel the ebbs and flows so you can understand the rhythm of Life -- synch with it -- and live harmoniously with its seasons.
 

budwise

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Learn to listen and how to negotiate (suggested book: "Never split the difference")
 

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