<div class="bbWrapper"><blockquote data-attributes="member: 64612" data-quote="Kevin88660" data-source="post: 810060"
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My suggestion is find people with common goals and encourage one another. <br />
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Provide help and value to one another. <br />
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I am in financial sales and my good friends now are those in the same circle. We pool money to rent premises to do sales activity together. I believe that comrades in a battlefield builds lasting real relationship.
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I guess thats why im on this forum. Ive found some guys i talk with, and hopefully it becomes a good relationship after a while.<br />
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<blockquote data-attributes="member: 50550" data-quote="Kruiser" data-source="post: 810061"
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This could be a clue to the problem. Your focus is off. Don't ask "why doesn't anyone send me a message, invite me out, or ask what's up?". Ask "how many times do I send someone a message, invite someone out, or ask someone what's up?"<br />
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If you would have a friend, be a friend.
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Oh dude, believe me ive tried.<br />
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<blockquote data-attributes="member: 45471" data-quote="Sadik" data-source="post: 810078"
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Friendships only happen over shared activities. School friendships usually last a lifetime because as kids you shared so much activities together. Go to Meetup.com or similar places from where you can find events happening near you. Go to a few events which interest you even if they are paid. You will meet other people who share same interests as you and you can connect.<br />
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In general, be interested in people genuinely. Also be interesting. Watch your words, how you introduce yourself, how you are dressed etc. Nobody wants to be with a loser, I don't think you would either. When in doubt what to say, silence is almost always better than saying something stupid... <img src="/community/imgs/emoticons/em-smile2.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" data-shortname=":)" /><br />
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Try it out, let us know how it went.
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Thanks, ill see whats nearby that i may enjoy.<br />
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<blockquote data-attributes="member: 32930" data-quote="BellaPippin" data-source="post: 810100"
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You are not socially retarded! You might be introverted, shy, or both (they are NOT the same thing!)<br />
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As an introverted person (but not shy) I do pretty well socially but it drains all the energy from me. After a while I need to retreat to be by myself. And there is no shortage of introverts, we're everywhere we just don't like small talk either so you see how it's not very conductive to start relationships. You can't just walk up to someone and be like "the 9-5 is a lie!!!" <img src="/community/imgs/emoticons/em-tongue.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":p" title="Stick Out Tongue :p" data-shortname=":p" /><br />
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My advice: take up a class/activity of something you enjoy <b>AND where the people attending are always the same</b> (so like, not a gym class where every day someone different comes). But a X-week course of something of your interest. Or volunteering where everyone signed up is the same for a while. Or a meetup for (example) D&D where the same people always go play.<br />
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The way you make friends is by means of seeing the same people (people you click with) regularly. Rapport/bonding with someone takes time. Like the Fox in The Little Prince. I met my best friend when I worked at the bank, we were both tellers. We worked together for a year and forever kept in touch. She's my all. But have I just come across her at a networking event we probably would not have built enough rapport to keep in touch and see each other again. Building friendships isn't like dating.
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Thanks, I'm also introverted, and not shy. Just a bit awkward<br />
Ill try to look for some activities. Its hard to find something interestng in the area.. maybe ill be the one hosting lol.</div>