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Personal challenge - no porn, no coffee, more discipline!

simplymoto

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So after 21 days of no fap I slid back into fapping for five times in the past four days...again. It's really hard to do this with all the restrictions going out.... It's day zero again. When I first started no fap it was the hardest the first few days and I only lasted couple days before giving up, now it's easier to get into no fap but the deal breaker is that once I slide back in after X days I will just fap and fap as if it's like gorging after fasting....

Other issues I am facing is that I can't really get the momentum going for meditation despite doing for over six months....in those easier days I can just sit for 15 minutes and try to space out my random thoughts, but in those lousier days I can only do it for five minutes before giving up, the myriad of random thoughts got the best of me.

Really appreciate if guys that have been there done that give some advice.
 
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simplymoto

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This year
Early rise (done) in 2020 this is getting better and better, no alarms needed and I got up at 6am today!
No sugar (done) in 2019 going strong as usual, in fact salt and soya sauce is also featuring less in my life!
No Facebook (done) in 2019 going strong, but I did pick up Tinder/Bumble in August
No coffee (done) in 2019 I stopped drinking coffee for a year but decided to get back in August, I don't know if this is the right decision, but I gathered having no coffee didn't change much of my life so I am back drinking nowadays
Exercise & diet (done) in 2020 Fittest time of my life, and taking the advice of this forum and doing mostly compound weights, lost 20 pounds so have gotten comments that I am looking good!

August update
No Fap (kinda done) in August 2020 I actually stopped counting my no faps in August, but I think I did fap once or twice.... Overall I think I can now safely say that I am not addicted to porn anymore, maybe occasionally slipping once a week or two weeks, that's all. I know it's a far cry compared to many no fap gurus, but I am happy to get till here. Yesterday night I was very bored that I actually fire up a porn site, only to have self control after browsing the first page. I know I can't quit porn and fap entirely, but at least it is not a major feature in life anymore.
Make my bed,
Meditate,
Nightly journal,
Top 3 GSD,
stop picking nose

These five habits are still patchy, as said I have a 80 day meditation streak but no more. Top 3 GSD was really helpful but kinda got stuck not doing it anymore, I know it's disgusting but I used to pick my nose alot but much much less nowadays, maybe because it's the mask I can't do it LOL.

I shouldn't say this but Covid has turn out to be a long reflection for me, and it's making me a better person.
 
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simplymoto

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I ended up fapping again three times yesterday....
 
D

Deleted78083

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After 150+ days wandering in the flatline, I have finally gotten out of it and all the marvellous advantages of nofap are there: super brain, super optimistic, super social, a lot of energy etc. It has been though, really really really really though at times, but definitely worth it.
 
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simplymoto

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After 150+ days wandering in the flatline, I have finally gotten out of it and all the marvellous advantages of nofap are there: super brain, super optimistic, super social, a lot of energy etc. It has been though, really really really really though at times, but definitely worth it.
Tell us more.

Did u nofap for 150 days or? And what’s ur background: age, fap history, relationships etc? Thanks
 

simplymoto

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I ended up fapping again three times yesterday....

So I fapped twice on 2nd Oct which means I lasted ~21+ days.

I am not sure if it’s cheating cos I am seeing someone now. Why fap when you have the real deal! But I also think that when I was in relationships the urge to fap not really left so it should be counted into “no fap” days. Thoughts ?
 

AidenRafi

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Go hard my dude!

I am on similar path with no fap/porn.

I lasted 3 months before and it was the most productive 3 months of my life.

I got back on it after i got my teeth pulled out as a kind of stress relief.

From this week I am back on the horse.

No-Nut October here we come!

edit:

Just to add to this, incase anyone was wondering. I think the reason for more productivity without porn/fapping is due to the decreased availability in instant dopamine hits.

As I decreased all quick dopamine hits from my life (social media, porn/fap, getting girls) I start looking elsewhere. This elsewhere was more productive areas of my life, which includes a longer process to the dopamine hit (learning a new skill, acquiring clients etc).
 
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simplymoto

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Go hard my dude!

I am on similar path with no fap/porn.

I lasted 3 months before and it was the most productive 3 months of my life.

I got back on it after i got my teeth pulled out as a kind of stress relief.

From this week I am back on the horse.

No-Nut October here we come!

edit:

Just to add to this, incase anyone was wondering. I think the reason for more productivity without porn/fapping is due to the decreased availability in instant dopamine hits.

As I decreased all quick dopamine hits from my life (social media, porn/fap, getting girls) I start looking elsewhere. This elsewhere was more productive areas of my life, which includes a longer process to the dopamine hit (learning a new skill, acquiring clients etc).
Half way through No Nut October
 

mguerra

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Hey @simplymoto , nice to read your thread man!

I'm also kinda "discipline freak" and see real value on this stricts regimen.

Specially nowadays with so much cheap dopamine avaiable, modern man is really screwed if one doesn't learn to resist impulses and practice self-control.

My dopaminic demons were weed and porn. Thank God I had those conquered.

I sure relapse from time to time but nowadays it's much more "intentional" and on rare ocasions.

One thing that got me to quit those things was to really reflect on the impact of this lifestyle choices 5-10 years off the future. Is this person (that indulges in those habits) the man you want to become?

What kind of husband will you be? What kind of father will you be? What kind of businessman will you be if you don't have the discipline to control resist your impulses?

It all comes down to instant gratification. Squander it out of your life - and don't make too much of a big deal.

For years I was stuck in my own personal story of how "these were my vices and they held power over me."

Once I left this story behind and de-dramatize my situation things got waaay easier.

"What a man thinketh in his heart, so is he."

So, watch your thoughts, my friend. And create a more positive and empowering self-talk in relation to these habits you want to conquer.

Every morning and every night you must say to yourself in a repetitive manner, almost like a mantra, that you have the will to make these changes permanent and you are a different, stronger and better man now.

You deserve the success you want.

Just for the discipline of writing that many logs on this thread, I cal feel...

You're bound to greatness.

Just stay strong on your path.


PS: In regards to your "nose picking habit", you should definetely check an NLP technique called SWISH.

Here's a video that teaches you how to do it:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=um9OiPaKuqI


It's a very effective technique used to stop all sorts of compulsions and undesirable patterns of behaviours (habits). It works from nail biting to excessive blinking - even OCD.

You should give it a try. 10 minutes of doing little tricks inside your mind and you are done.

I'd love to know if it works for you.

Hope that helps, brother.
 

metallon

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Hi I am chronicling my challenge.

Background: I am a 35 yo entrepreneur in my 7th year of tech-hood, business are going well and expanding, and there is a chance we can be something bigger. Right now, the firm's limit is my own ability to handle the business and myself, and I've come to realize that personal discipline will be most people's demon, at least it is mine. I want to create the ultimate habit of good life.

No Porn (7th day)
This sounds perverted, but it's something I (or most men?) am addicted to, I used to surf porn almost everyday, and it was really hard to quit (I guess one doesn't quit porn). I am now on my 7th day of abstinence, the longest I've done is a little over a month. I realized by cutting porn I become sharper and clearer, and porn is not on my mind all the time. Expert says that it also improves dating life.

No Fap (7th day)
Almost like porn, and go hand in hand. So yes, I want to get rid of this habit too. I don't think I'll ever quit fap and porn fully, and that's not the point, but I want to reduce the frequency to where it is healthy and I have control over. Incidentally my best social and sex life this year was when I refused to partake in porn and fap.

Daily 30 minutes no interruption of learning
Oh man, today my phone wire broke and I can't charge my phone, that is how I ended up typing this post. Time also seems to move so slow, but so productive. I want to give myself 30 minutes of no interruption to learn something, anything. And right now is learning Spanish

Daily 10 minutes meditation (1st day)
I can't seem to "get" the zen yet, and have only remember doing it in random days. The longest I've done was about two week. I want to give it a go and really make it a habit. The least that comes out of it is that I have my day's to-do items prioritize as I can't do anything other than sit. Of course the best would be to get thoughts our of my head.

No Coffee (cured)
Contentious but I don't have addiction and find quitting easy, I am now on my second month of abstinence and I have abstained before for two months prior before picking up a few cups again.

No Facebook (cured)
F**k FB! I am done with it.

Note: I realized that the secret to creating habits is to record, record, record. Recording progress really works! Secondly, stop using the phone! at least for 30 minutes a day during learning session, or better intermittent 30 minutes without phone.
Thanks for posting this.

I had gone 90 days on NoFap+ Meditation. This was best self development thing I had done ever in my life. My anxiety were gone totally and I was confident and calm.

But when I started my entrepreneurial journey, I had a lot of mental turbulence and I relapsed many times and I started distracting myself using social medias.

After some time, I told myself to get my shit together and started my NoFap journey again (currently day4). I still have heavy mental turbulence as moving further but I'm making progress in my journey.

I strongly recommend everyone to take this journey and I am sure you will be a different person if you are using porn and social media excessive.
 
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mguerra

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The effects of holding my seed + meditation are ashtonishing for me as well.

One thing that really works for me in regards to porn/masturbation was to dissociate myself from the pleasure of orgasm.

How?

By doing kegels everyday, doing some edges here and there and ejaculating once I'm past 7 days or so.

(Edging is the act of masturbating without ejaculating)

This way I still "stimulate" myself, work my PC muscles and get all the benefits of quitting porn without atrophying my member.

Matter of fact, I get MORE stamina in real sex because I'm conditioning myself to last longer and to process higher levels of pleasure without ejaculating.

Ps: I don't like the prolonged periods of nofap very much. I've come to note that everytime I go too long on this my performance is affected when I engage in sexual activity with a real woman.

The optimal frequency to me is to ejaculate every 7-10 days, specially if I do 2-3 edging sessions in this period. No porn allowed.

Porn really F*cks up your brain, man. Better stay off and use your imagination instead.

As a bonus, you build really good visualization skills that transfer to other areas of your life. Lol.

Win/Win.
 

BarKogan$

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Hi I am chronicling my challenge.

Background: I am a 35 yo entrepreneur in my 7th year of tech-hood, business are going well and expanding, and there is a chance we can be something bigger. Right now, the firm's limit is my own ability to handle the business and myself, and I've come to realize that personal discipline will be most people's demon, at least it is mine. I want to create the ultimate habit of good life.

No Porn (7th day)
This sounds perverted, but it's something I (or most men?) am addicted to, I used to surf porn almost everyday, and it was really hard to quit (I guess one doesn't quit porn). I am now on my 7th day of abstinence, the longest I've done is a little over a month. I realized by cutting porn I become sharper and clearer, and porn is not on my mind all the time. Expert says that it also improves dating life.

No Fap (7th day)
Almost like porn, and go hand in hand. So yes, I want to get rid of this habit too. I don't think I'll ever quit fap and porn fully, and that's not the point, but I want to reduce the frequency to where it is healthy and I have control over. Incidentally my best social and sex life this year was when I refused to partake in porn and fap.

Daily 30 minutes no interruption of learning
Oh man, today my phone wire broke and I can't charge my phone, that is how I ended up typing this post. Time also seems to move so slow, but so productive. I want to give myself 30 minutes of no interruption to learn something, anything. And right now is learning Spanish

Daily 10 minutes meditation (1st day)
I can't seem to "get" the zen yet, and have only remember doing it in random days. The longest I've done was about two week. I want to give it a go and really make it a habit. The least that comes out of it is that I have my day's to-do items prioritize as I can't do anything other than sit. Of course the best would be to get thoughts our of my head.

No Coffee (cured)
Contentious but I don't have addiction and find quitting easy, I am now on my second month of abstinence and I have abstained before for two months prior before picking up a few cups again.

No Facebook (cured)
F**k FB! I am done with it.

Note: I realized that the secret to creating habits is to record, record, record. Recording progress really works! Secondly, stop using the phone! at least for 30 minutes a day during learning session, or better intermittent 30 minutes without phone.
That's a brilliant idea. I can only see good things in this challenge ! Good luck
 

simplymoto

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Hey @simplymoto , nice to read your thread man!

I'm also kinda "discipline freak" and see real value on this stricts regimen.

Specially nowadays with so much cheap dopamine avaiable, modern man is really screwed if one doesn't learn to resist impulses and practice self-control.

My dopaminic demons were weed and porn. Thank God I had those conquered.

I sure relapse from time to time but nowadays it's much more "intentional" and on rare ocasions.

One thing that got me to quit those things was to really reflect on the impact of this lifestyle choices 5-10 years off the future. Is this person (that indulges in those habits) the man you want to become?

What kind of husband will you be? What kind of father will you be? What kind of businessman will you be if you don't have the discipline to control resist your impulses?

It all comes down to instant gratification. Squander it out of your life - and don't make too much of a big deal.

For years I was stuck in my own personal story of how "these were my vices and they held power over me."

Once I left this story behind and de-dramatize my situation things got waaay easier.

"What a man thinketh in his heart, so is he."

So, watch your thoughts, my friend. And create a more positive and empowering self-talk in relation to these habits you want to conquer.

Every morning and every night you must say to yourself in a repetitive manner, almost like a mantra, that you have the will to make these changes permanent and you are a different, stronger and better man now.

You deserve the success you want.

Just for the discipline of writing that many logs on this thread, I cal feel...

You're bound to greatness.

Just stay strong on your path.


PS: In regards to your "nose picking habit", you should definetely check an NLP technique called SWISH.

Here's a video that teaches you how to do it:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=um9OiPaKuqI


It's a very effective technique used to stop all sorts of compulsions and undesirable patterns of behaviours (habits). It works from nail biting to excessive blinking - even OCD.

You should give it a try. 10 minutes of doing little tricks inside your mind and you are done.

I'd love to know if it works for you.

Hope that helps, brother.

Great post brother.

"cheap dopamine" is everywhere and it's killing the modern men and women. Weed, porn and fap are all very obvious, and I really want to call out another devil - "social media". Apps like FB, Instagram and Tinder are draining so many modern man's energy, and taking away real life, fun and meaningful experience.

My take home from your post.
1) Tell myself daily the "mantra". morning and before bed - "One small step a day and I deserve to be great"
2) Ask myself what I want to be in five years. I have major issues with relationships and settling down (which men don't) and I really need to ask some hard questions, I can't keep running away from getting into serious relationships and have fun all the time. Maybe someday I'll write a post, I am sure it's an issue many men have.
3) SWISH - I will check this out.
 
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simplymoto

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Thanks for posting this.

I had gone 90 days on NoFap+ Meditation. This was best self development thing I had done ever in my life. My anxiety were gone totally and I was confident and calm.

But when I started my entrepreneurial journey, I had a lot of mental turbulence and I relapsed many times and I started distracting myself using social medias.

After some time, I told myself to get my shit together and started my NoFap journey again (currently day4). I still have heavy mental turbulence as moving further but I'm making progress in my journey.

I strongly recommend everyone to take this journey and I am sure you will be a different person if you are using porn and social media excessive.

Have you consider doing meditation, or doing a mini journal to achieve "one simple thing" daily? I find this small things helpful in moving my mental turbulence away.

I say this with honesty and to share with a fellow FLF. I have been doing this entrepreneurship thing for ten years and have built a business worth tens of millions. You have got to dream big but take small steps. Small steps are literally baby steps - it could be writing the email that you dread, or selling your first product. Whatever it is, do the baby steps, especially baby steps that you think it's easy but hard in truth because it's F*cking hard to sell your first product, or sell your first hundred products, or write the email to fire/hire someone because it's an emotional inertia.
 

metallon

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You have got to dream big but take small steps. Small steps are literally baby steps - it could be writing the email that you dread, or selling your first product.
I'm 24 and quit my job the previous week to work on my idea. My idea has great potential but I was scared and avoided it almost for a year. But now I am working on it to make it as a reality. Right now building a website and often I feel anxious what if it does not work as I expected. Your words inspired me to push me beyond my fear.

I'm doing meditation too. It's helping me to keep calm and watch my emotions go by.
 

Lyinx

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For any porn addicts (from a former addict)
It's a long struggle, and totally worth it. It messes with your mind in ways that you can't understand for a few years.

I found one thing very helpful... Open tab with porn, then close it. Open another tab, scroll down over it, close it, then go to work. This needs to be at a time when your not in the mood to watch.

This allows you to do the standard action that usually leads to watching porn, but without the reward. Eventually, you will cave in and feel like watching porn, open up a tab, and then you realize that you have the power to shut the tab!

The rush of power/self-confidence when you do this is incredible.
 
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simplymoto

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For any porn addicts (from a former addict)
It's a long struggle, and totally worth it. It messes with your mind in ways that you can't understand for a few years.

I found one thing very helpful... Open tab with porn, then close it. Open another tab, scroll down over it, close it, then go to work. This needs to be at a time when your not in the mood to watch.

This allows you to do the standard action that usually leads to watching porn, but without the reward. Eventually, you will cave in and feel like watching porn, open up a tab, and then you realize that you have the power to shut the tab!

The rush of power/self-confidence when you do this is incredible

I felt super in control at times when I pull that off, especially the first time.
 

simplymoto

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Hey @mguerra , just watched the video, so it's NLP-styled mind reprogram.

Take home from the video, in NLP you make the ideal image of you larger (replacing the bad habit)
1) The specifics is that the ideal image has to be in "general state" not "specific state" because it is harder to be in specific state, say working out, than general state, say standing with good posture and not smoking. In the case of trying to quit smoking
2) The other specifics is that when you repeat the ideal image enlarging, you have to pause for each repetition to feel that the better state has become larger and thus replacing the older state. If you repeat the states to practice without the pausing both old and new states feels like a "yoyo" back and forth rather than one state growing and replacing another.
 

mguerra

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For any porn addicts (from a former addict)
It's a long struggle, and totally worth it. It messes with your mind in ways that you can't understand for a few years.

I found one thing very helpful... Open tab with porn, then close it. Open another tab, scroll down over it, close it, then go to work. This needs to be at a time when your not in the mood to watch.

This allows you to do the standard action that usually leads to watching porn, but without the reward. Eventually, you will cave in and feel like watching porn, open up a tab, and then you realize that you have the power to shut the tab!

The rush of power/self-confidence when you do this is incredible.

That's a really great tip, buddy.

I'll definetely try this If I ever falter and watch porn again.
 
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mguerra

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Hey @mguerra , just watched the video, so it's NLP-styled mind reprogram.

Take home from the video, in NLP you make the ideal image of you larger (replacing the bad habit)
1) The specifics is that the ideal image has to be in "general state" not "specific state" because it is harder to be in specific state, say working out, than general state, say standing with good posture and not smoking. In the case of trying to quit smoking
2) The other specifics is that when you repeat the ideal image enlarging, you have to pause for each repetition to feel that the better state has become larger and thus replacing the older state. If you repeat the states to practice without the pausing both old and new states feels like a "yoyo" back and forth rather than one state growing and replacing another.
1) Yes. You are right

2) I don't think those details are of too much impact. From my experience, what makes this technique work is the repetition and the clarity of the 'trigger image'. Once you repeat the process enough, the trigger loses power and you gain some edge (react time) when the impulse hits.

Mind you it's not magic. It's something to give you a little more power over choices when you get to that crossroads moment - do the behaviour or not.

I've used this with success many times to stop nail bitting habits and even to weaken my porn habits.

Do this religiously everyday for 1 week and tell what you noticed.
 

simplymoto

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1) Yes. You are right

2) I don't think those details are of too much impact. From my experience, what makes this technique work is the repetition and the clarity of the 'trigger image'. Once you repeat the process enough, the trigger loses power and you gain some edge (react time) when the impulse hits.

Mind you it's not magic. It's something to give you a little more power over choices when you get to that crossroads moment - do the behaviour or not.

I've used this with success many times to stop nail bitting habits and even to weaken my porn habits.

Do this religiously everyday for 1 week and tell what you noticed.

Hey I think I kicked my bad habit this week ... ;-)
 

Jdes91

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Hi I am chronicling my challenge.

Background: I am a 35 yo entrepreneur in my 7th year of tech-hood, business are going well and expanding, and there is a chance we can be something bigger. Right now, the firm's limit is my own ability to handle the business and myself, and I've come to realize that personal discipline will be most people's demon, at least it is mine. I want to create the ultimate habit of good life.

No Porn (7th day)
This sounds perverted, but it's something I (or most men?) am addicted to, I used to surf porn almost everyday, and it was really hard to quit (I guess one doesn't quit porn). I am now on my 7th day of abstinence, the longest I've done is a little over a month. I realized by cutting porn I become sharper and clearer, and porn is not on my mind all the time. Expert says that it also improves dating life.

No Fap (7th day)
Almost like porn, and go hand in hand. So yes, I want to get rid of this habit too. I don't think I'll ever quit fap and porn fully, and that's not the point, but I want to reduce the frequency to where it is healthy and I have control over. Incidentally my best social and sex life this year was when I refused to partake in porn and fap.

Daily 30 minutes no interruption of learning
Oh man, today my phone wire broke and I can't charge my phone, that is how I ended up typing this post. Time also seems to move so slow, but so productive. I want to give myself 30 minutes of no interruption to learn something, anything. And right now is learning Spanish

Daily 10 minutes meditation (1st day)
I can't seem to "get" the zen yet, and have only remember doing it in random days. The longest I've done was about two week. I want to give it a go and really make it a habit. The least that comes out of it is that I have my day's to-do items prioritize as I can't do anything other than sit. Of course the best would be to get thoughts our of my head.

No Coffee (cured)
Contentious but I don't have addiction and find quitting easy, I am now on my second month of abstinence and I have abstained before for two months prior before picking up a few cups again.

No Facebook (cured)
F**k FB! I am done with it.

Note: I realized that the secret to creating habits is to record, record, record. Recording progress really works! Secondly, stop using the phone! at least for 30 minutes a day during learning session, or better intermittent 30 minutes without phone.
No fap is definitely a real thing!!! Good job on the commitment. I've tried no fap for a couple of weeks and it was great. Felt like my focus, motivation, mood and concentration was much much better. I fell off after a few weeks (its tough) but for the short while it was great. Keep up the good work!
 
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Ron Gipp

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Hi I am chronicling my challenge.

Background: I am a 35 yo entrepreneur in my 7th year of tech-hood, business are going well and expanding, and there is a chance we can be something bigger. Right now, the firm's limit is my own ability to handle the business and myself, and I've come to realize that personal discipline will be most people's demon, at least it is mine. I want to create the ultimate habit of good life.

No Porn (7th day)
This sounds perverted, but it's something I (or most men?) am addicted to, I used to surf porn almost everyday, and it was really hard to quit (I guess one doesn't quit porn). I am now on my 7th day of abstinence, the longest I've done is a little over a month. I realized by cutting porn I become sharper and clearer, and porn is not on my mind all the time. Expert says that it also improves dating life.

No Fap (7th day)
Almost like porn, and go hand in hand. So yes, I want to get rid of this habit too. I don't think I'll ever quit fap and porn fully, and that's not the point, but I want to reduce the frequency to where it is healthy and I have control over. Incidentally my best social and sex life this year was when I refused to partake in porn and fap.

Daily 30 minutes no interruption of learning
Oh man, today my phone wire broke and I can't charge my phone, that is how I ended up typing this post. Time also seems to move so slow, but so productive. I want to give myself 30 minutes of no interruption to learn something, anything. And right now is learning Spanish

Daily 10 minutes meditation (1st day)
I can't seem to "get" the zen yet, and have only remember doing it in random days. The longest I've done was about two week. I want to give it a go and really make it a habit. The least that comes out of it is that I have my day's to-do items prioritize as I can't do anything other than sit. Of course the best would be to get thoughts our of my head.

No Coffee (cured)
Contentious but I don't have addiction and find quitting easy, I am now on my second month of abstinence and I have abstained before for two months prior before picking up a few cups again.

No Facebook (cured)
F**k FB! I am done with it.

Note: I realized that the secret to creating habits is to record, record, record. Recording progress really works! Secondly, stop using the phone! at least for 30 minutes a day during learning session, or better intermittent 30 minutes without phone.

This is inspiring.
A year and a half ago I quit cigars and energy drinks.
I'm currently weaning off coffee at the suggestion of my nutritional consultant.
I have gone long periods without watching porn.
But now I want to do a day count.
Congratulations on your successes!!
 

simplymoto

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OP here.


I started this thread a little over a year ago to CHANGE. Those seemingly small but time-wasting thing. As a late 30 year old I seem to have this awful little habit that my friends don't - it's like college days habit, is it because they are married and bad habits get filtered out?

Why am I writing all this thing here, keep reminding myself the journey. I just want to make sure weeks/months/years when reread, I know my journey, and this keeps me in check. Because slipping back to old habits is way to easy, as we know too well.


Done with social network for > a year
Now I am not saying unplug from the Internet, we are all very connected, but that doesn't mean abusing ourselves by indulging in self inflated Facebook posts, Tinders and what not. I am not over a year free from Facebook, though I did suffer an episode of using Tinder for two months for dating. The real absolute truth is that it is much better to meet quality men and women in real life than on Tinder, it is a handicap and we don't know how to talk to opposite sex stranger anymore.

Current status: Done with Facebook and the likes
Next challenge:pLEASE DON'T DOWNLOAD TINDER AGAIN, GO TALK TO STRANGERS

Done with porn and less fap for a year
It's been a year, I can proudly say that I am getting a hang on this SOMEWHAT. I watch porn almost every night in 2018 but in 2019 onwards the desire is not there anymore, the longest I've done was 45 days without fap and porn.

Well, it's impossible for me to quit porn fully (when as a bachelor if I can do 21 days that'd be sweet), and it's alright to fap occasionally (also 21 days), but just say that it is a revelation for someone that faps daily.

Current status: No/Controlled fapping/porning.
Next challenge: I haven't open a pornhub tab for about two months now, large part helped by having a steady date, but the next time I have I be sure to try out @Lyinx 's open and close tab challenge

Making my bed, arranging my keys
Now this is probably the most ambiguous to-achieve list, but really my life was a f****g mess, I used to misplace my keys everywhere - sofa, bed, closet, tables, kitchen tables etc, and every week there is a day that I spend 15 minutes looking for my keys before heading out, those dog days are over! OK. I then move on the making my bed, which is done almost daily now, and now I wanna make my table nice. My ultimate aim is really to get things orderly, and looks wise I don't want my apartment to look like a college bachelor crib.

Current status: It's a lot to do in this list, sometimes vague. Done with putting keys into my bowl, making my bed.
Next challenge is perhaps my working table, my clothes closet?

Done with picking nose (I think)
The lamest habit, really. Shows how little will power I have to have this bad habit stuck with me for years. I got rid of it after using @mguerra 's NLP tecnique, here's to you Mguerra! You guys remember I mentioned that for you who have a partner most of this habit won't be visible to you, as I am still picking my nose, I don't think if I have a girlfriend this habit will be with me because she would have complained. My question is does having a partner automatically eliminates half of the bad issues here.

Current status: done but best revisit the NLP technique for another two weeks.

Consistently meditating for a year
I am not recording daily but I can say it’s at least once every two days, the challenge is to get the full ten minutes, many times I don’t last ten minutes.

Current status: Just continue meditating, best daily but once 2 -3 days is fine too.
Next status: Last for ten minutes each time.

Writing journal for four months
A few paragraph daily to chronicle my success, failures and frustration. For the past, 120 days I've written 58 entries slightly over four month so averaring one journal every two days. I find this very empoweting to spend five minutes before bed doing this, or when waiting for your bus.

Current status: ongoing.

Waking up early for a year
My sleeping hours was a mess, yes having your own does not help, but it’s more about me. I initially thought it will be really hard to kick away but after the initial first month struggle (it involves putting away my handphone) it just worked

CURRENT STATUS: done

Work Out for > a year
All too common after college male story. Got sloppy, stop working out, got belly. Getting back in shape was really hard and it started about April 2019, it really took a hell of a time.

It's been > a year of hitting the gym room /jog/swim, and I try to record all my trainings each time, for weights it's still very compound weights and random in the eyes of a trained gym-goers, but it's absolutely great for me to have been persistent so long

CURRENT STATUS: I HOPE TO TAKE IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL.

My next step?

I have two things that lingers in me, both are related to productivity. I want to share more the next time.

Thanks you guys, if you have read this thread, it's been over a year and I thank you all for your support, feedback and etc.
 
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mguerra

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OP here.


I started this thread a little over a year ago to CHANGE. Those seemingly small but time-wasting thing. As a late 30 year old I seem to have this awful little habit that my friends don't - it's like college days habit, is it because they are married and bad habits get filtered out?

Why am I writing all this thing here, keep reminding myself the journey. I just want to make sure weeks/months/years when reread, I know my journey, and this keeps me in check. Because slipping back to old habits is way to easy, as we know too well.


Done with social network for > a year
Now I am not saying unplug from the Internet, we are all very connected, but that doesn't mean abusing ourselves by indulging in self inflated Facebook posts, Tinders and what not. I am not over a year free from Facebook, though I did suffer an episode of using Tinder for two months for dating. The real absolute truth is that it is much better to meet quality men and women in real life than on Tinder, it is a handicap and we don't know how to talk to opposite sex stranger anymore.

Current status: Done with Facebook and the likes
Next challenge:pLEASE DON'T DOWNLOAD TINDER AGAIN, GO TALK TO STRANGERS

Done with porn and less fap for a year
It's been a year, I can proudly say that I am getting a hang on this SOMEWHAT. I watch porn almost every night in 2018 but in 2019 onwards the desire is not there anymore, the longest I've done was 45 days without fap and porn.

Well, it's impossible for me to quit porn fully (when as a bachelor if I can do 21 days that'd be sweet), and it's alright to fap occasionally (also 21 days), but just say that it is a revelation for someone that faps daily.

Current status: No/Controlled fapping/porning.
Next challenge: I haven't open a pornhub tab for about two months now, large part helped by having a steady date, but the next time I have I be sure to try out @Lyinx 's open and close tab challenge

Making my bed, arranging my keys
Now this is probably the most ambiguous to-achieve list, but really my life was a f****g mess, I used to misplace my keys everywhere - sofa, bed, closet, tables, kitchen tables etc, and every week there is a day that I spend 15 minutes looking for my keys before heading out, those dog days are over! OK. I then move on the making my bed, which is done almost daily now, and now I wanna make my table nice. My ultimate aim is really to get things orderly, and looks wise I don't want my apartment to look like a college bachelor crib.

Current status: It's a lot to do in this list, sometimes vague. Done with putting keys into my bowl, making my bed.
Next challenge is perhaps my working table, my clothes closet?

Done with picking nose (I think)
The lamest habit, really. Shows how little will power I have to have this bad habit stuck with me for years. I got rid of it after using @mguerra 's NLP tecnique, here's to you Mguerra! You guys remember I mentioned that for you who have a partner most of this habit won't be visible to you, as I am still picking my nose, I don't think if I have a girlfriend this habit will be with me because she would have complained. My question is does having a partner automatically eliminates half of the bad issues here.

Current status: done but best revisit the NLP technique for another two weeks.

Consistently meditating for a year
I am not recording daily but I can say it’s at least once every two days, the challenge is to get the full ten minutes, many times I don’t last ten minutes.

Current status: Just continue meditating, best daily but once 2 -3 days is fine too.
Next status: Last for ten minutes each time.

Writing journal for four months
A few paragraph daily to chronicle my success, failures and frustration. For the past, 120 days I've written 58 entries slightly over four month so averaring one journal every two days. I find this very empoweting to spend five minutes before bed doing this, or when waiting for your bus.

Current status: ongoing.

Waking up early for a year
My sleeping hours was a mess, yes having your own does not help, but it’s more about me. I initially thought it will be really hard to kick away but after the initial first month struggle (it involves putting away my handphone) it just worked

CURRENT STATUS: done

Work Out for > a year
All too common after college male story. Got sloppy, stop working out, got belly. Getting back in shape was really hard and it started about April 2019, it really took a hell of a time.

It's been > a year of hitting the gym room /jog/swim, and I try to record all my trainings each time, for weights it's still very compound weights and random in the eyes of a trained gym-goers, but it's absolutely great for me to have been persistent so long

CURRENT STATUS: I HOPE TO TAKE IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL.

My next step?

I have two things that lingers in me, both are related to productivity. I want to share more the next time.

Thanks you guys, if you have read this thread, it's been over a year and I thank you all for your support, feedback and etc.
Congrats, brother! Nice to hear that you're done with the nose picking habit.

Let me share one tip that immensely helped me to internalize the meditation practice...

Most people tell you to meditate once a day for XX days. That's cool and nothing wrong with that.

But if you really want to really make this practice stick in your life I'd say something a little different:

Try meditating 3 times a day, for 30 days. The sessions must be done as soon as you wake up, after lunch and in bed (sitted) before going to sleep.

What this regimen will do to you is it'll drill the practice down much faster in your life (as you'll practice 3 times a day vs only 1 time a day)

The way to think is this: you'll compress 90 days of practice in 30 days. And as it's a much shorter timespan it's waaay easier to mantain the consistency in this period than the longer one.

Other positive aspect is that even if you fail to do all the 3 sessions somedays, you still be doing and least one, and thats great!

If you can't handle 10 mins, try 5 mins. Doesn't make much of a difference. (Altought I advise you to train your fcking willpower and stick with the 10 mins sessions. That's the minimum.)

And I strongly recommend that you make the first session as soon as you wake up INEGOTIABLE. If you do it right first thing in the morning all your other disciplines you become easier, like a cascade effect.

Wake up, go to the bathroom, drink a glass of water and sit on your couch to meditate for 10 mins. Then go through your day with the first victory dialed in.

Let me know if it helps.

Stay strong, buddy!
 

simplymoto

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Congrats, brother! Nice to hear that you're done with the nose picking habit.

Let me share one tip that immensely helped me to internalize the meditation practice...

Most people tell you to meditate once a day for XX days. That's cool and nothing wrong with that.

But if you really want to really make this practice stick in your life I'd say something a little different:

Try meditating 3 times a day, for 30 days. The sessions must be done as soon as you wake up, after lunch and in bed (sitted) before going to sleep.

What this regimen will do to you is it'll drill the practice down much faster in your life (as you'll practice 3 times a day vs only 1 time a day)

The way to think is this: you'll compress 90 days of practice in 30 days. And as it's a much shorter timespan it's waaay easier to mantain the consistency in this period than the longer one.

Other positive aspect is that even if you fail to do all the 3 sessions somedays, you still be doing and least one, and thats great!

If you can't handle 10 mins, try 5 mins. Doesn't make much of a difference. (Altought I advise you to train your fcking willpower and stick with the 10 mins sessions. That's the minimum.)

And I strongly recommend that you make the first session as soon as you wake up INEGOTIABLE. If you do it right first thing in the morning all your other disciplines you become easier, like a cascade effect.

Wake up, go to the bathroom, drink a glass of water and sit on your couch to meditate for 10 mins. Then go through your day with the first victory dialed in.

Let me know if it helps.

Stay strong, buddy!

Absolutely crucial to do it first thing in the morning, before you check your phone! If you can set your phone to sleep mode, that's even better so you don't see all the notifications when you check the time and start meditating.

I am just super happy that I can now sit still for 10 minutes first thing in the morning. I've also started doing an evening session whenever I have time, I guess that's the softcore version of your 3 x 30 days challenge!
 

simplymoto

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Day 1 again for NoFap and NoPorn challenge, lasted 80 days this time, my best record.

Porn is like weed and dopamine hit, even with a partner I am thinking of lately after 80 days of not fapping and porn. I ended up fapping with porn three time that night.
 
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simplymoto

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I can't help but to revisit my previous challenges again, writing down helps me to have perspective of how much/little I have achieved.

No Porn / Low Fap (Topped at 80 day)
Recently looking at my diary, I actually started this challenge at least on April 2019. WOW.

My previous high numbers 41 days , 35 days , 47 days 28 days (Jan 19), 20 days (Feb 26), 20 days (Apr 26), 20 days(May 15), 80 days (26 Nov). Now on my fourth day.... I will need to No Porn till Valentines Day 2021 to break my 80 day streak record.

Meditation (Almost daily)
Been over a year of this, not religiously counting, but it's becoming a "first-thing-before-checking-phone" morning habit. Still misses out on going all the way 10 minutes at times...

Work out (going at over a year)
I am doing about 4 - 5 times a week, and recording all daily progresses since November 2019, so it's a year now of writing down my work out routines! I've also share my beginner workout routine in the forum.

Early rise (8 months)
Since March/April it's 6+ or 7+ am waking up. Harder now with a sleeping partner but I still try to do it before 7:30am, which is a big deal still for me I think, but yeah I need to get back to early 7am.

No SNS (> a year)
No Facebook for over a year or two, and no Tinder for over two months now.... I really advocate not using Tinder for singles and go meet people in real life. Interestingly I am told myself not to touch Tinder for over two months now thinking that is a new resolution but I actually told myself not to play Tinder way in April 2019, I guess old habit dies hard.

Below are the hit or misses......
No phone 30 minutes a day learn something new (miss)
Calorie count (started strong but miss)
Nightly journal (still not doing often)
Top 3 GSD (it was really really great, that I do three important things a day, I'd say I am doing GSD one a week only now, it has to be almost daily)
stop picking nose (almost until I started picking again this week)
 
Last edited:

simplymoto

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PS: In regards to your "nose picking habit", you should definetely check an NLP technique called SWISH.

Here's a video that teaches you how to do it:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=um9OiPaKuqI

It's a very effective technique used to stop all sorts of compulsions and undesirable patterns of behaviours (habits). It works from nail biting to excessive blinking - even OCD.

@mguerra, do you think SWISH works in overcoming your fear. Eg: repeat a certain feared thought in the head (i.e. “I have cancer” or “My gf will reject me”). Make the thought gloomy and vivid, and fade away with the SWISH technique being replaced by the intended results. I've heard it works wonders when it comes "life situations" like speaking to strangers / approaching girls. Any thoughts?
 

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