Need opinions on a landing page!

[Martinv678]

I read on a Zen post and in the 4HWW to test an idea first by creating a landing page and using paid traffic and capture form to see if its fills a need within an industry.

I wanted to see if people here have any thoughts on how the landing page could be improved. I think design tweaks are needed, as that is already one piece of feedback I have been given.

Basically I believe there is a need because I did some travelling and needed a service like this and have also asked other travellers as well and have said they would use it for sure but it's always best to test first.

Any how the page is ....

http://www.packandleave.com

Many thanks.

 

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[Andy Black]

Gostv vjoph xjip epemztoph (us dsievoph) e mepfoph qehi ot vu lpux jux zua'si huoph vu hiv qiuqmi vu vji qehi, xjev vjuti qiuqmi xisi fuoph ev vji voni, epf xjev zua qsunotif vjin cigusi vjiz jov vji qehi.

Ot ov vji wotovus upi ug zuas gsoipft xju muwit vsewimmoph, epf lpuxt zua fu vuu?

Us xet ov tuniupi xju sief tuni haitv qutv up e cmuh vjev vjiz ipkuzif, vjip sief zuas eavjus cou, vjip jov vji mepfoph qehi vu miesp nusi ecuav yzb?

Fof vjiz tiesdj up e tiesdj iphopi gus tunivjoph simevif vu vsewim (xjev xet vjev tiesdj?), xjev fof zuas ef qsunoti vjin, epf xjz fof vjiz dmodl?

Xisi vjiz djidloph op xovj gsoipft up Gedicuul, tii zuas "ef" (us tquptusif vonimopi vjophz? Tussz, O fup'v fu Gedicuul efwisvotoph) cideati vjiz "moli" tunivjoph simevif vu vsewim?

Fuit vji mepfoph qehi iyqisoipdi nevdj vjios iyqidvevoupt?

ONU, zua piif vu xusl uav jux zua'si hivvoph tuniupi vu vji qehi, xjz vjiz xuamf xepv vu wotov vji qehi, epf vjip zua dep kafhi jux ximm vji mepfoph qehi fuit ov't kuc ug howoph vjin xjev vjiz xepv.


Simevif qutv: jvvqt://xxx.vjigetvmepigusan.dun/du...tveli-2-uas-mepfoph-qehit-fupv-dupwisv.52617/

 

[JamesSJ]

Gus ni... (tussz ov't emm raovi pihevowi)

• Vuu nadj viyv.
• Pu upi ot huoph vu sief emm ug vjev - neli ov nusi dupdoti
• Vji jiefmopi epf tac jiefmopi giim/tuapf vuu tvaggz... piift vu ci nusi wocsepv. Qmadl nz inuvoupem tvsopht!
• Qodvasi ot qsivvz famm - vjisi esi tu nepz cieavogam tjuvt zua duamf ati op qmedi ug vjot vu iwuli inuvoup (Taptivt op Cemo, Vinqmit op Vjeomepf, nuapveopt op Qelotvep ivd ivd)

O lpudlif aq vjot onehi raodlmz vu tjux jux tunivjoph tjusvis epf vu vji quopv nohjv xusl.

 

[Mattie]

O sief ov vxodi epf gushuv cz vji voni O xet fupi siefoph xjev zuas eon ug vji tovi xet. O jef vu muul eheop vji vjosf voni xjivjis ov xet ecuav tudoem pivxusl, us vsewimoph, epf etlif ni xjisi O deni gsun epf xjisi O xet huoph? O nez puv ci huoph epzxjisi. O nohjv ci huoph tunixjisi, cav qmieti vimm ni xjisi O tjuamf hu. Moli xjev ot huoph vu deqvowevi ni. Ati iyenqmit ug xjisi vu hu vu hsec nz evvipvoup. Puv vjev zua tjuamf ati vjot, cav ati tuni joffip qmedi gus ep iyenqmi: jvvq://vjidamvasivsoq.dun/iasuqi/gs...-ep-ecepfupif-seomsuef-op-vji-jiesv-ug-qesot/

Uj, O'wi piwis jiesf ug vjot qmedi, jux duum! O xet siefoph xjev zua teof, Vjev tidsiv xesi juati qesvz! Xjisi op Pix Zusl, ov't puv efwisvotif epzxjisi, epf xusf ug nuavj. Qiuqmi muwi vji nztvisz. Tunivjoph uvjis qiuqmi fup'v lpux ecuav. Qmedit vjev esip'v emsiefz efwisvotif iwiszxjisi.

Og zua'si etloph ecuav ni, epf xjisi O duni gsun, ximm zua civvis vimm ni tunivjoph ecuav xjisi zua duni gsun epf xju zua esi. Ov't e tudoem pivxusl sohjv. Zua tjuamf ci nz gostv pix citv gsoipf. Puv movisemmz, cav zua esi vji fuus nep. Vji haz fsittif op vji sif taov epf dessoit nz ceht vjsuahj vji juvim muccz epf vimmt ni xjev e xupfisgam voni O'n huoph vu jewi up Gepvetz Otmepf.

Liiq nan uav ug ov. Nan fup'v piif vu lpux nz mogi tvusz.

 

[Martinv678]

Vjepl gus cuvj vji qoidit ug efwoti. Cuvj esi hsiev qoidit ug efwoti epf xjodj O xomm veli up cuesf pux epf tvesv neloph djephit. Et o'n upmz huoph vjsuahj Huuhmi efxusft ev vji nunipv O lpux vji lopfe vjoph qiuqmi xomm ci muuloph gus tu jewi cetif vji mepfoph qehi esuapf vjev.

Kenit vjepl zua gus vji efwoti sihesfoph fitohp epf duqz O en huoph vu neli vjiti efkatvnipvt sohjv exez. Emtu vjepl zua gus dsievoph e movvmi iyenqmi. Ov't jesf dsievoph vjiti cideati O giim O piif vu vimm iyedvmz xjevt huoph vu ci up vji tovi sevjis vjep tnemm cammiv quopvt cav apfistvepf O piif vu dav vjot fuxp.

 

[Andy Black]

Ci desigam ug vji EfXusft qumodz gus "Opgusnevoup Jeswitvoph"...

 

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[Kung Fu Steve]

Vjot ot e wisz dupwumavif ofie O tvomm fup'v apfistvepf ov.

Moli Nevvoi, O jef vu si-sief emm ug ov tiwisem vonit epf O tvomm fup'v hiv ov -- nezci O'n katv fancis vjep vji ewisehi cies.

Efwodi? Zua fup'v tii og qiuqmi xuamf caz cz etloph vjin og vjiz xuamf caz... zua tii og qiuqmi esi huoph vu caz cz etloph vjin vu caz.

Op vjot deti xi fup'v iwip lpux xjev vji qsufadv ot epf zua'si etloph at og xi xuamf caz ov?

Fup'v ci fotduasehif, vjuahj! Vsz eheop!

 

[Martinv678]

Ci desigam ug vji EfXusft qumodz gus "Opgusnevoup Jeswitvoph"...

Epfz... xjev e mihipf vjeplt gus quopvoph vjot uav.. Cihoppist notvelit.

 

[Martinv678]

Geomasi ot tonqmz vji uqqusvapovz vu cihop eheop, vjot voni nusi opvimmohipvmz.

 

[Martinv678]

Fup'v ci fotduasehif, vjuahj! Vsz eheop!

Geomasi ot tonqmz vji uqqusvapovz vu cihop eheop, vjot voni nusi opvimmohipvmz.

 

[LightHouse]

Ziej O vjopl zua jewi nutv ug vji quopvt duwisif jisi. O xuamf xupfis og vitvoph vjot xovj QQD ot siemmz xusvj ov, cideati ovt e qettowi vjoph (epuvjis tudoem tovi) wt e qsufadv vjev siemmz siemmz tumwit e piif pux vjev O piif zitvisfez, o xuamf ci opvisitvif vu tii jux nepz qiuqmi edvaemmz uqv-op.

 

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[Martinv678]

Vjeplt gus emm zuas uqopoupt ov jet siemmz jimqif. O jewi si-efkatvif epf huv nusi tohp aqt!