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EXECUTION Moving the needle, and readjusting along the way

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DMNinja

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Feb 14, 2021
82
78
58
Greece/ Cyprus
Hello yet again!

It's been a period of reflection and self-growth for me. I've moved forward, faced fears, got a further understanding of myself, and now it's the time I make this thread.

My end goal is to build and maintain a civil engineering business, while creating value in the sector by getting first-hand domain experience as a licensed civil engineer.

I've been away from forum participation, mostly because I knew I'd use it as an out for action faking. I'd just be around and "contribute" to threads without furthering my own dreams and goals.

Speaking of which! They're still not clear! But I've long since resolved it doesn't matter! Change is a system, not a decision. As long as I can maintain coherence to my values, I can move on forward and readjust the needle if needed. But now to get to the meat and potatoes of the thread:

In this thread, I'll be journaling my progress, process and forks in the road. It's not meant to be updated daily, but it is meant to be read by me for reference, and sometimes for me to speak thoughts out loud. Sometimes it's here so I don't forget or discount my progress. Insights that might provide value will be added in my mindset thread.

Without further ado, I'm moving on to the first entry:
 

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DMNinja

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Feb 14, 2021
82
78
58
Greece/ Cyprus
Things that I have got going for me:
  • I literally can expand into any topic of my choosing. I am smart enough to do so at a whim.
  • I have finally reconciled my past with my present
  • I have established a system for determining and acting on the next action on anything in my life
  • I have grown more accustomed to moving forward even if I don't feel like it.
  • I have slowly started to learn to recognize recurring life patterns.
  • Somehow doggedly listening to the same material over and over and somehow still learning
  • Somehow not having quit even if I know nothing about my journey or why I want to move.
  • My ability to somehow having bettered my life by troubleshooting my problems subconsciously.
  • My ability to somehow slowly but surely moving forward by understanding snippets of the knowledge I absorb
Things that are working against me:
  • My own personal impostor syndrome
  • Decision paralysis
  • Possible fear of progress(?) Might be the same as my impostor syndrome
  • A long journey with a big desert of desertion
  • The whole lockdown situation affecting my physical and mental health
  • I can't seem to form a coherent weighed option valuation. Ever.
Things that I know and want to expand on or combine:
  • Civil Engineering
  • Materials Science
  • Artificial Neural Networks
  • Optimization Theory
  • Books on systemic methodology if needed
 

DMNinja

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Feb 14, 2021
82
78
58
Greece/ Cyprus
My goal right now:

  • Get 12 months worth of tutelage to be able to register as a civil engineer
  • Be able to perform statical integrity analysis
  • Be able to perform on-site optimizations and overseering
  • Get registered as a licensed civil engineer

Future goals:

  • Work for the 3 of yrs needed so I can apply in Greece for a no-questions-asked license
  • Have adequate experience in both fields of engineering by then so I can identify value array
  • Skew the value array by manually providing a better service to the customers.
  • Find a way to automate my business so it works without me.
  • Work on implementing my knowledge in ANNs and optimization to design a SaaS that'd add value to the industry.
  • As per unscripted , scale, multiply and propagate.
  • Use the money from my business to fund my money systems
  • Unscription, with persistence.
 

DMNinja

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Feb 14, 2021
82
78
58
Greece/ Cyprus
UPDATES:
Comments/updates in bold
Things that I have got going for me:
  • I literally can expand into any topic of my choosing. I am smart enough to do so at a whim. (Looks like I need to feel the heat to switch gears)
  • I have finally reconciled my past with my present (I feel less burdened now by "wrong" past decisions)
  • I have established a system for determining and acting on the next action on anything in my life (GREAT SUCCESS! This has been a game-changing, if not life-changing habit. I can now progress even if I don't remember a single thing that I wanted to do)
  • I have grown more accustomed to moving forward even if I don't feel like it. (Partly because of my new system. I've also learned to not think about things that much. Especially if I already pre-determined they should be done)
  • I have slowly started to learn to recognize recurring life patterns. (Yes, but I sadly don't pay attention to them. Not as much as I should)
  • Somehow doggedly listening to the same material over and over and somehow still learning (I still do so. Still learning things that didn't sit with me previously. Will continue to do so.)
  • Somehow not having quit even if I know nothing about my journey or why I want to move. (Yes, and somehow I am more determined now that I feel the heat. Somehow.)
  • My ability to somehow having bettered my life by troubleshooting my problems subconsciously.
HUGE thanks to @ZCP . This has been transformative

  • My ability to somehow slowly but surely moving forward by understanding snippets of the knowledge I absorb (I am curiously not being proud about it. I feel like I should)
Things that are working against me:
  • My own personal impostor syndrome (Still there. Still taunting me. I've figured out that it doesn't show up if I do things for small time increments. [Maybe it will]. So I do things part of me wants to avoid for a minimum of 10 minutes per day, and then I am free to call it done. Surprisingly, I don't work on them for only 10 minutes recently)
  • Decision paralysis (Have not encountered any life-shattering/altering decision yet.)
  • Possible fear of progress(?) Might be the same as my impostor syndrome (No idea yet. I mean, I do progress. But is it progression towards a scripted path or is the branch off that I plan within my head alone?)
  • A long journey with a big desert of desertion (It's been exhausting me. But for some reason, I can keep on going. Slowly, but not backwards.)
  • The whole lockdown situation affecting my physical and mental health (It is a source of anxiety. With my ability to even shop for groceries severely diminished, some days I worry about food and life. I've been excommunicated from all social activities by government diktat. I also worry about my family that have swallowed the lies hook, line and sinker. I worry that a mandatory digital pass is coming on September. We've become a "papers please" society and I've starting to actively resent people that are all for it. Being isolated feels like the better choice, although it still affects my mental health)
  • I can't seem to form a coherent weighed option valuation. Ever. (Still accurate.)
Things that I know and want to expand on or combine:
  • Civil Engineering (On it)
  • Materials Science (Not yet identified the value skew)
  • Artificial Neural Networks (Not even looked into that one yet)
  • Optimization Theory (I've taken baby steps trying to disseminate OT to a group of people. Teaching feels like the best way to do it.)
  • Books on systemic methodology if needed (Not needed yet)

My goal right now:

  • Get 12 months worth of tutelage to be able to register as a civil engineer (In progress)
  • Be able to perform statical integrity analysis (Not yet started, but I've secured a way to do so. It requires the dreaded "10-11hr workday. I am free to do it, and I am free to not do it. The choice is liberating and empowering. I can always do it if I really want to)
  • Be able to perform on-site optimizations and overseering (In progress)
  • Get registered as a licensed civil engineer (Awaiting confirmation)

Future goals:

  • Work for the 3 of yrs needed so I can apply in Greece for a no-questions-asked license (Will start counting as soon as I finish my tutelage)
  • Have adequate experience in both fields of engineering by then so I can identify value array (I've identified a single part of it [other than price]. Time punctuality)
  • Skew the value array by manually providing a better service to the customers. (Not yet)
  • Find a way to automate my business so it works without me. (Not yet)
  • Work on implementing my knowledge in ANNs and optimization to design a SaaS that'd add value to the industry. (Not yet)
  • As per unscripted , scale, multiply and propagate. (Not yet)
  • Use the money from my business to fund my money systems (Not yet, but It's down in my projects to engage in this behavior as part of the 4Ds for now.)
  • Unscription, with persistence. (Not yet)

As I am writing this, my skin is red from the sun exposure, and extremely sensitive to the touch. My breathing is heavy from the extreme heat I had to take head on. But no-one else seems to be having those issues. They've adapted. And so will I.
It is late (18:41) and I am tired. I will sleep in about 3 hours and 19 minutes But I somehow managed to clear my Next Actions Lists for the day, and I managed to act upon all actions on my calendar. I am somehow more patient now about the goal.

I wish it were easier and I'd like to know if I've done a right decision. But I have to act before I can adjust. And so, I am acting. I've noticed that I do actual progress when I stop beating myself over what I consider to be "slip-ups/mistakes". Is this how not actively hating yourself feels like? I don't know. I just need to put one foot in front of the other, and move, but never backwards.

Thank you for reading. Until the next update
-Constantine
 
Last edited:

DMNinja

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Feb 14, 2021
82
78
58
Greece/ Cyprus
UPDATES:
This is an update long overdue. I am extremely scatterbrained while writing this, but writing is what I'll do regardless. It's certainly been an experience for me. I've grown into the system I've built for myself and results started showing.

They've adapted. And so will I.
I am slowly adapting to the heat. But more importantly, I've optimized my schedule by waking up at 05:00 every morning and dealing with the things that need dealing before I arrive at the construction site. I can slowly understand the system that is my life. More importantly, I'm understanding how to meaningfully influence it.

I wish it were easier and I'd like to know if I've done a right decision. But I have to act before I can adjust. And so, I am acting. I've noticed that I do actual progress when I stop beating myself over what I consider to be "slip-ups/mistakes". Is this how not actively hating yourself feels like? I don't know.
Apparently so.

I just need to put one foot in front of the other, and move, but never backwards.
Funny thing is, I've done more and achieved more when under pressure. Is this just me or is it the human condition?

---
I really want to share my insights with the forum, but my mind seems to not want to cooperate today. All I know is that I've moved forwards. Daily. Methodically. Systematically. If this is how a system feels like, then systemizing my life will be easier than I expected.

An observation: I've noticed I've been changing habits but I don't feel like I had any identity shift/cataclysm. I am moving forward as a person, even without understanding why or how. I still don't know if I've had my FTE or if I've got a strong MP, but I'm not even sure that it matters.

Waking up this early by choice, determining my life with extreme accuracy, listening to the same information over and over and over and over again, keep on moving one foot in front of the other and never backwards are actions that feel instinctual. Like they resonate with me.

I've become more curious about myself and why I do or don't do specific things. When I encounter something previously considered a "failure of willpower", it's now substituted by the observation that I acted outside of myself. And thus, I need to understand how to decrease the chances of it happening in the future.

My current state is a weird place to be in. But it's progress. Progress towards a goal that I chose. Feels weird honestly. I've been avoiding looking at/participating in the forum because I use it as an action fake. I am now more of a stranger here. I don't know how to feel about this, and frankly, part of me doesn't care about how I'm viewed.

I've noticed that when I'm tired, my patience gets close to zero and my temper can get from 0 to 100 in the blink of an eye. I need to rest and recover. I hope some odd thought of mine struck you as something valuable.

As always, thank you for your time
-Constantine
 

Black_Dragon43

Gold Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Speedway Pass
Apr 28, 2017
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Eastern Europe
When I encounter something previously considered a "failure of willpower", it's now substituted by the observation that I acted outside of myself. And thus, I need to understand how to decrease the chances of it happening in the future.
Can you elaborate on this? What do you mean “acted outside of myself”? And how does this observation help you?

I’m watching this thread, by the way
 

DMNinja

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Feb 14, 2021
82
78
58
Greece/ Cyprus
Update:

Hello yet again. Long time no nothing (from my side at the very least). I was at my hometown. The experience was transformative. I am back in Cyprus and have gone on with my goals without skipping a beat. Most notably, I have started to identify my industry's value array and I'm thinking of ways to skew it. Other than that, I have some observations in mind, but before that, I want to address the following. Comments as always in bold.
Things that are working against me:
  • My own personal impostor syndrome (GONE)
  • Decision paralysis (GONE)
  • Possible fear of progress(?) Might be the same as my impostor syndrome (GONE)
  • A long journey with a big desert of desertion
  • The whole lockdown situation affecting my physical and mental health
  • I can't seem to form a coherent weighed option valuation. Ever.
For some reason I can't explain (probably the outcome of my process(es)), I'm not beating myself up anymore. I'm not "managing" myself. Nor am I comparing myself to others. This rings much like MJ's comparative immunity.

How does it feel? Zen is an apt descriptor. I've kinda stopped caring about some quandaries that i had posted above. Like the relation between pressure and the human condition. I just keep putting one foot in front of the other and moving the needle. I've been learning sales during my holidays, and I'm trying to be an asset to my community (at least in Greece).

I have understood that as I change, so do some other people. And apparently for the better. People that want to improve can't hide it apparently. Neither can I. There's this fire driving us. So I guess I've got a strong MP, even if I don't understand it, or am able to put it into words.

Weird observation, but it seems like focusing intently on achieving a goal feels like freeing oneself from one's own mental shackles. Imagine a giving yourself permission to go after what you want....

Most things are indeed in one's own head, but that doesn't make them less real. It's ironic that both statements are true. I'm not going to pretend that I am a master of discipline or motivation, but I feel like the answer resides IN SYSTEMS, not actions.

Every single good thing that is in my life right now, I have designed it to be so. And that gives me a nice segway into:
Can you elaborate on this? What do you mean “acted outside of myself”? And how does this observation help you?
What this means is simply this: My systems are my intent translated into actions. When i "act outside of myself" means that I am led by impulse, not by intent.

Practically speaking, it means that there's a need for a better system. One that can facilitate the intended choice even when the odds are against my original intent. Simply put, the system needs to be too good to fail.

For example: If my intent is to get to 9% BF and I binge on a pizza one day, that simply means that I have not designed a system capable of making the intended option the attractive and satisfying option under specific circumstances (mental exhaustion from being in the construction site all day, elevated internal temperature, high humidity conditions etc).

A way to solve this has been to have already portioned out the food from the day before, so it's easier to open my fridge and grab my portion and eat on the spot than to order because portioning my food feels like too much work that day. I also need to upgrade the tastiness of my food since some days, tastiness is ranked extremely high in the value array. Thus pizza wins. But you're a smart man. You get my point
I’m watching this thread, by the way
It's my honor. Greatly appreciated @Black_Dragon43

In closing, I want to leave anyone reading this post with this: systems can be improved with time. Actions can not. Actions are solitary and confined to a moment in time. Systems extend through time and are thought out. Design systems, don't perform actions.

As always, thank you for your time
-Constantine
 
Last edited:

DMNinja

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Feb 14, 2021
82
78
58
Greece/ Cyprus
2 weeks since my last forum activity huh?

I guess it's time i updated the thread...

There's spanners in the works. I guess it was expected.

1. I've been unable (thus far) to keep my discipline when i return from my tutelage. That means that i've not solved the issues described in my above post.

2. I also become extremely scatterbrained when i get back home, and even the most basic of tasks become nigh impossible sometimes. Today is such a day to be honest.

3. I also don't understand how some people can seem able to keep focus, even after those hours.

As a matter of fact, it took me about an hour to gather my brain and type out these few lines of text.

So i guess this is priority #1 now. Figure out why, so I can use more of my day in a meaningful fashion

Honestly, any and all help would be appreciated to solve the above issues. But even if nobody does provide insights, I'll just figure it out. I know i can.

As always, thank you for your time
-Constantine
 

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