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Habits of the Unscripted

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DMNinja

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What is an unscripted person made of?

I've been thinking long and hard about mindset, naturally leading to questions about changing it to become in line with one's values. The answer clicked about 10 minutes prior to me posting this topic. In the book "Atomic Habits by James Clear" the process of changing one's habits to reflect one's values is the process of self-actualization. You literally become your habits and your results are a lagging measure of said habits. I want to grow into becoming an unscripted entrepreneur, so the question becomes:

What are the habits are embodied by the unscripted entrepreneur? (business-agnostic)

I understand that a mindset can't change if the identity of a person doesn't change, and an identity doesn't change as long as one keeps reinforcing it with the same type of behavior. With that in mind, I decided to expand the scope of this thread (from a self-serving one) to one that provides value towards the whole forum. The aim of this thread is to facilitate for easy access to habits (identity-morphing tools) that can be implemented into one's life, as well as a quick lookup for new members that want to change their mindset after arriving to the same conclusion that I did. I understand the need for members to be able to create their own conclusions (and thus habits), but even exposure to unscripted practices are enough to get someone's mind thinking about:

What is the common denominator of all these successful people in the habits they outline? What is it they do that I don't?

@MJ DeMarco is the one that probably understands this concept inside and out, since he put in the work and figured out what's serving that identity, and what does not. I am sure many other people are just as capable, but I am not aware If/ who to point towards or even ask for input.

Thank you for your input
-Constantine

PS: Being a new user to the forum, I am not aware if tagging when not being an established member is frowned upon but if so, please remove the mention during the thread review process​
 

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Kal-El1998

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What is an unscripted person made of?

I've been thinking long and hard about mindset, naturally leading to questions about changing it to become in line with one's values. The answer clicked about 10 minutes prior to me posting this topic. In the book "Atomic Habits by James Clear" the process of changing one's habits to reflect one's values is the process of self-actualization. You literally become your habits and your results are a lagging measure of said habits. I want to grow into becoming an unscripted entrepreneur, so the question becomes:

What are the habits are embodied by the unscripted entrepreneur? (business-agnostic)

I understand that a mindset can't change if the identity of a person doesn't change, and an identity doesn't change as long as one keeps reinforcing it with the same type of behavior. With that in mind, I decided to expand the scope of this thread (from a self-serving one) to one that provides value towards the whole forum. The aim of this thread is to facilitate for easy access to habits (identity-morphing tools) that can be implemented into one's life, as well as a quick lookup for new members that want to change their mindset after arriving to the same conclusion that I did. I understand the need for members to be able to create their own conclusions (and thus habits), but even exposure to unscripted practices are enough to get someone's mind thinking about:

What is the common denominator of all these successful people in the habits they outline? What is it they do that I don't?

@MJ DeMarco is the one that probably understands this concept inside and out, since he put in the work and figured out what's serving that identity, and what does not. I am sure many other people are just as capable, but I am not aware If/ who to point towards or even ask for input.

Thank you for your input
-Constantine

PS: Being a new user to the forum, I am not aware if tagging when not being an established member is frowned upon but if so, please remove the mention during the thread review process​
In my opinion it's probably pain. At least that's what it is for me. The pain of always having to rely on someone else other than myself and my own efforts.
 

DMNinja

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In my opinion it's probably pain. At least that's what it is for me. The pain of always having to rely on someone else other than myself and my own efforts.
But how does that translate into habits? In my OP, it is mentioned that one basically become what they do repeatedly. What habits do you translate your pain into, and how does those habits translate into progress?
 

Kal-El1998

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But how does that translate into habits? In my OP, it is mentioned that one basically become what they do repeatedly. What habits do you translate your pain into, and how does those habits translate into progress?
Well for one waking up early every day haha. The longer your up, the more you'll get done. Generally speaking of course.
 

DMNinja

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Well for one waking up early every day haha. The longer your up, the more you'll get done. Generally speaking of course.​
To add to my own thread, i'll also add my own simple rule:

No More Zero Production Days (nm0p)

It's extremely simple, and it's more of an entry-level habit, but it's easy to understand and adhere to.
I define Production as the action that i take towards the creation of a tangible product. I am currently working on:​
  • finishing my thesis (i think about it as a free resource)​
  • An instruction manual for a community i am involved in (results in a tangible .pdf booklet)​
  • Developing an Artificial Neural Network (ANN)​
From my experience, and from reading the book mentioned in my OP, a habit with a clear trigger and simple execution is easy to adopt. With that in mind, this will become a springboard, but for now, it's a good way to measure if a day was successful
 

DMNinja

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I know it's been a long time since my last post, but I've been busy. Busy reading Unscripted again, busy picking up some niche freelance work for money, busy trying to reflect back to the past when I first read the book, and how my life has changed since then. I've been trying to "Start as if I were to continue". I've decided to keep on adding value to these threads, since they might prove to be valuable for other people
 

DMNinja

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Another habit that comes from the unscripted realm, boils down to a self-reflective question. One that I just happened to ask aloud today:

How much TIME does that cost?

I know this sounds an awful lot like something straight out of Unscripted and to be fair, that's probably the originator, but it's a powerful reframe tool. Not for things you want to buy, but of the things you want to apply your time to.

I had a conversation today where I was doing a valuation on some niche freelance I am working in. When discussing my thoughts on expanding, the conversation was (almost) hijacked towards the "But outsourcing the work would mean you make much less money yourself". That's where I instinctually replied with this phrase. What that phrase implies is:

Whatever you choose to spend your time on, is (by definition) not worth the reimbursement of time spent. That effectively means that time is better spent in instances where:
  • You spend time now to not spend time later (indentured time now for free time for the rest of your life)
  • You spend time on things that you enjoy doing. A highly subjective valuation, and prone to slowlane traps. For this reason, more crucial in understanding it.
In this case, outsourcing part of the freelance work would mean that I might be pocketing less money, BUT I'd have the TIME to do something else. Like furthering my own entrepreneurship goals. Or even goofing around for a day (if I feel like doing so, that is).

This phrase holds the distinction between skill-based business models vs running a business. In other words:

If the business can't function without you, it's not a business.

Same applies to my niche, ironically enough, and I thought I'd share that with all of you.
 

DMNinja

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This time, I won't add a habit per se, but rather an observation that could lead to a habit:

Opening up the TV is akin to inviting someone over to your living room to sell/ lecture you

Some context: I was away on deployment, as mentioned in my Intro, and when it finished I decided to spend time with family. They won't be around forever after all.

What I started noticing (thanks RAS!) is that they open up the TV at lunchtime when there's "news" and tons of infomercials. I'm the only one on the table not looking at the screen. Day by day, the above thought started forming.

Now what does it imply? Would YOU open your door to a direct marketing agent, sit them on a chair and let them sell you a product for 2 hours straight? No? When you open up a TV and have it play as background noise, that is exactly what you're doing.

Same applies with "news". Information repeated by "authority figures" is information accepted. Channels know about this already. And so do many of the people within this forum. Would you open up your door to any political party with an agenda, sit them beside you for lunch while you eat, so they can tell you how shit the world is and of course, how they can solve it? No? ...You get the point.

The same applies to radio by the way, but to a lesser extent, since it's not as effective as the TV.

But all the above thoughts harbor another question: Doesn't the same happen with the internet? Yes, but you get to choose what you look at.

Unlike TV, where broadcasting is controlled by a few people/ conglomerates that own the channels, a website can be owned by anyone that can pay the appropriate providers. In other words, you won't ever find anything like TFF on either TV or the Radio. You won't find pure educational content or even pure entertainment in a custom-tailored format either. I'm not a proponent of just consuming content on the internet though.

With that in mind, The original statement can be shaped into the one below:

When you consume any type of content, you invite its producer into your house to deliver content. That content is always colored by the producer's 3Bs (or in the case of prejudiced parties) what they want to pass onto you.

It's frankly impossible to find something worth your time on TV, and highly improbable to do so on the internet. But it's not impossible. Otherwise we wouldn't be here, or me writing this post. I've found it extremely polarizing to think of content consumption like the aforementioned examples. And it makes it easy to know if I should be interested in any type of content. 80's action adventures? Hell yes! Modern agenda-driven 90-min box office movies? Naah, I'll pass. News from any source? Naah. Pure data published by organizations so I can arrive to my own conclusions? Yes, I will. And so on.

Now, one last thing. I mentioned that there could be the potential for a habit here. Where and how does it fit in?

Simply substitute automated content consumption for deliberate content consumption in the same time slots that you already did.

Simple, really :) Don't turn on the radio while driving, but open up an audiobook. Don't open up the TV while having lunch. Talk to the people on your table. The ones you spend your life with. If you really need background audio during the day, open up a stream of music of your choice, if concentrating needs to happen. Substitute passive entertainment for active entertainment. This requires a lot of self-reflection and understanding of where you want to go, but it's worth it in the end. Why?

Because you get to choose instead of a prejudiced party choosing for you.
 

DMNinja

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Hello everyone! I've been on a weird spot lately to be honest, party due to working on my thesis, and partly due to feeling down about the way the world's going at the moment. I'll freely admit i've produced little to no tangible work all this time. It's kinda come as a shock that the scripted 3B structure has still been binding me and I think i'll have to make progress even while bound.

I was initially thinking about posting a habit that i've found to be working, but i was unable to think of one. It's more of a whisper that i feel deep down in my soul and it's this:

Don't take what you think you have understood or internalized for granted. Doing so will make you lose your hard-earned ground. Apparently unscription is like nutrition and exercise. You either have to use it or lose it.

Frankly, i've got a question: do you think it's a good practice to keep an accountability/ mindset journal? If yes, where would you post it? I've seen journals all over the place.

Thank you for reading this short and kinda somber post
 

DMNinja

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Hello again everyone!

On my entrepreneurial journey, I've started to develop a habit which has served me well. I hope that by sharing it, you will find how and if it applies to your life and journey.

Instead of consuming content (TV/ Radio/ Games etc) in your free time, produce a little bit of content on your personal area of interest and share it with a community you already are a part of (Discord server, FB group etc).

But why would you do that you may ask? I've found it's the simplest and possibly the most immediate way to experience the motivation feedback loop of producing. Let me provide some context. Before I even had a plan or knew what I was doing, I was just doing random things for my enjoyment, which never felt really fulfilling. One of those things was to play a specific MMORPG. Due to a bad internet connection, but a very awesome guild that had provided value in the context of the game through guides members wrote, I stopped playing but chose to start writing a guide myself. On the second week of consecutive releasing (I released the document in PDF format once a week) I started getting positive echoes by people that I didn't know or have ever talked to offering their support and in some cases, knowledge and skills.

Other than many echoes (comments on what would be nice to see in-text, or what is missing), I've had two "gold" events by now. A retired editor of a big literary house and a columnist on a big sports blog have offered their writing advice to me, which has made me a better writer/ editor of my own works already. There's something magical about being tired and seeing an uplifting "Thank you so much for your work" message.

Due to the scope of this guide, I've already had a proposal to transcribe it to a paid audiobook, as well as monetize the work itself.

So give it a try! Instead of consuming for entertainment, PRODUCE for entertainment! Unlike your primary (and only) venture, producing for entertainment has no requirements, other than the ones you set for yourself. Produce for something you already enjoy doing, and share it with a group that you are already a part of!
 

DMNinja

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Another one, and this time it's quick and easy to digest(Left it here, just so you can laugh at it in posterity)!

This idea dawned on me, since I dispensed it in another medium. But here it is:

It doesn't matter if you don't have your 3B's in order. Just make a plan and start executing. Your shift will come through evidence.

So what if you're unmotivated, and with no plan? Make one. Don't wait for the day to be motivated. Momentum begets momentum. Don't believe in your plan? Read my other posts on providing value. Feeling down? Understandable. Lockdowns are not a natural human condition. Proceed anyway. Use that as FU Fuel.
"FU and your regulations. I'll make it in life, get a big patch of land in the middle of nowhere, and live my life without you and your retarded diktats. I will raise my kids outside of the indoctrination camps you call schools. I will move to, acquire and defend my property."

It doesn't matter if you don't have a strong MP. The strongest MPs come from catastrophic events. Be glad you haven't had one of them to realize you need to keep moving. Execute, and you will kickstart your feedback loop anyway.

True story: I was listening to an amazing cover singer and stumbled upon his backstory. I got envious that I didn't have a strong mission like he did. But today I kicked myself hard mentally. I don't need to have my father die of cancer and my mother suffer from Alzheimer's (like he did) to form a strong MP. I SHOULD BE GLAD THAT I HAVE THE LUXURY OF NOT HAVING LIFE DEFINE MY MP FOR ME.
In case you might be wondering, now I am just listening to that guy just inspired by his progress, and no longer envious. He's unscripted and he's not even aware of it. Not in those terms at least. For those interested, look up Dan Vasc on YouTube

Make sure you vet your idea through the CENTS framework. If you're going to work hard, then work hard for something with promise.

Make a plan that makes sense. Think long, think hard, think of what you do that has a high entry barrier. Build a business around it. Do it. Provide value to those that have inconvenience in your own niche.

and most importantly:

What you think you know has got you to where you are. You need to see that to see where you need to go.
post hoc ergo propter hoc does not define anyone's life, unless they choose to.


This is a trap I fell (sometimes still do) into. But I'm content at realizing that even if I don't feel strongly to what I'm doing, it doesn't matter. The only thing that does is that I've identified a CENTS opportunity, I have many "why" reasons (pertaining to the future), and I am awake from the script.

So what if you don't know what and how to do it? Start regardless! You'll fall in front of those questions and you WILL resolve them if you want to move forward. Feeling shitty that you don't feel motivated? Who cares? Move regardless!

It was longer than expected. Hope you found these thought seeds valuable
-Constantine
 

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WJK

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You are making progress in your thinking. It's our smallest daily decisions that truly shape our lives. The big ones we think about and weigh before we move on them. The small ones are more critical because we usually put on automatic pilot through our habits. By living thoughtfully we can completely change the projection and the direction of our lives. It's how we brush our teeth... It's how we talk to our mate when we come home from work... It's what we think & do when someone cuts us off when we're driving... It's how we talk to ourselves moment by moment... It's layers and layers of small, knee-jerk reactions and habits. Think about it.
 

DMNinja

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You are making progress in your thinking. It's our smallest daily decisions that truly shape our lives. The big ones we think about and weigh before we move on them. The small ones are more critical because we usually put on automatic pilot through our habits. By living thoughtfully we can completely change the projection and the direction of our lives. It's how we brush our teeth... It's how we talk to our mate when we come home from work... It's what we think & do when someone cuts us off when we're driving... It's how we talk to ourselves moment by moment... It's layers and layers of small, knee-jerk reactions and habits. Think about it.

I'll be completely honest: My very first impulse was to say "I'm aware of what you told me, since it looks like we've both read the book".
But I won't say that. What I will say is this: "I will think about what you've told me, for just knowing does not equate to meaningful change. Acting upon, and improving one's daily habits is a lifelong endeavor that needs constant reinforcement. For one's environment is usually designed to stop improvement in lieu of comfort, one must strive to embody improvement as often as one can make themselves aware."

Thank you for responding to this (thread-turned-into-reflection?) thread. I greatly appreciate it :)
 

Ezra

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Feb 23, 2021
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I like this thread. I think your analysis is interesting and it shows that you keep improving and reevaluate your own perspective.
These days I've been extremely unproductive and demotivated. I've even got back to my ancient vicious (playing games, a lot). But since yesterday, I am feeling a little spark starting to burn inside me. I am always in a cycle where in some periods I am extremely productive and motivated, and then it comes periods with hard depression and loneliness. I think the good period will start soon.
I have a question for you, when you are not motivated, how do you set goals? How do you know the goal is something important and it is not something useless? This is one of my biggest problems where I see everything as not very useful to my goal.
 

DMNinja

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I like this thread. I think your analysis is interesting and it shows that you keep improving and reevaluate your own perspective.
These days I've been extremely unproductive and demotivated. I've even got back to my ancient vicious (playing games, a lot). But since yesterday, I am feeling a little spark starting to burn inside me. I am always in a cycle where in some periods I am extremely productive and motivated, and then it comes periods with hard depression and loneliness. I think the good period will start soon.

I'll be blunt: I used to be like that and I can tell you that there the only solution is a custom-tailored solution. Your solution. For me, it was many years of shifting my mindset, but as you can see in post #9, I still suffer from it. Sometimes. But let me try to be of help:

I have a question for you, when you are not motivated, how do you set goals?

I don't. I've already set goals when I was motivated. Then I just execute them in a fashion I have already predetermined.
How do you know the goal is something important and it is not something useless?

Relatively simple for me: Does it help make my own small corner of the world a better place? It's a gut check. If yes, then it's important to me. Does it bring a smile on the face of the people that I care about? Then yes. Does it make me feel satisfied when I receive feedback? Then yes.

Do you really want to stop doing useless things? Make it a point to find and follow people that actively ridicule what you have determined to be useless. You can not partake in something that you are actively despising.

This is one of my biggest problems where I see everything as not very useful to my goal.

Let me tell you a small parable: Imagine you being a scientist, and there's this weird animal called "life" in front of you. It's doing nothing really, but you've noticed that it sometimes does things if you prod it enough. Keep prodding and you'll start finding out what NOT to do. Those things will inform you of what you MIGHT want to do, and you will keep refining this process for the rest of your life.

Want something more actionable? Read the book that's on the OP of this thread. Then read it again. Then again. Then again. Get the audiobook and listen to it while taking a shower. Take weeks away from it to reflect on it. Then start changing. Don't expect overnight shifts. Expect regressions in behavior. Expect frustrations. Expect you not liking it. You complaining. You sliding back into old habits. You hating yourself for doing so. You persevering. You coming out the other end. Then expect you helping others in your own small corner of the world.

Follow this thread if you want. I'll keep updating it with thoughts and observations. I hope I was of help to you, and I hope you sincerely manage to change what you need. @Ezra
 

Ezra

New Contributor
Feb 23, 2021
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I'll be blunt: I used to be like that and I can tell you that there the only solution is a custom-tailored solution. Your solution. For me, it was many years of shifting my mindset, but as you can see in post #9, I still suffer from it. Sometimes. But let me try to be of help:



I don't. I've already set goals when I was motivated. Then I just execute them in a fashion I have already predetermined.


Relatively simple for me: Does it help make my own small corner of the world a better place? It's a gut check. If yes, then it's important to me. Does it bring a smile on the face of the people that I care about? Then yes. Does it make me feel satisfied when I receive feedback? Then yes.

Do you really want to stop doing useless things? Make it a point to find and follow people that actively ridicule what you have determined to be useless. You can not partake in something that you are actively despising.



Let me tell you a small parable: Imagine you being a scientist, and there's this weird animal called "life" in front of you. It's doing nothing really, but you've noticed that it sometimes does things if you prod it enough. Keep prodding and you'll start finding out what NOT to do. Those things will inform you of what you MIGHT want to do, and you will keep refining this process for the rest of your life.

Want something more actionable? Read the book that's on the OP of this thread. Then read it again. Then again. Then again. Get the audiobook and listen to it while taking a shower. Take weeks away from it to reflect on it. Then start changing. Don't expect overnight shifts. Expect regressions in behavior. Expect frustrations. Expect you not liking it. You complaining. You sliding back into old habits. You hating yourself for doing so. You persevering. You coming out the other end. Then expect you helping others in your own small corner of the world.

Follow this thread if you want. I'll keep updating it with thoughts and observations. I hope I was of help to you, and I hope you sincerely manage to change what you need. @Ezra
Thanks for the answer. My next step will be read Unscripted again, for sure.
What I realize with your answer is that I need to trust the decisions of my motivated self. He my motivated self believes something is important, I shouldn't question it in my current demotivated state. I should just believe him and follow his plan.
This will be an interesting mental exercise when my motivated state returns, to find useful things to do when I am not motivated.
I just uninstalled the games in my pc.
 

WJK

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I'll be completely honest: My very first impulse was to say "I'm aware of what you told me, since it looks like we've both read the book".
But I won't say that. What I will say is this: "I will think about what you've told me, for just knowing does not equate to meaningful change. Acting upon, and improving one's daily habits is a lifelong endeavor that needs constant reinforcement. For one's environment is usually designed to stop improvement in lieu of comfort, one must strive to embody improvement as often as one can make themselves aware."

Thank you for responding to this (thread-turned-into-reflection?) thread. I greatly appreciate it :)
I have found that it goes a little bit deeper than I ever thought. We grow and change all the time. I have found that I have actually become a contortionist, both in my thinking and actions, in order to do things the way that I have always done them in the past. It's silly but... there are those moments when I feel that making more changes is actually betraying myself and my past decisions. It's kind of a "sunk-investment" mindset. I worked so hard at getting to that place. I thought so hard along the way about how to handle things. And now here I am throwing away all those decisions and setting out in a new direction... When I have those feelings, I try to remind myself that water finds its own level. Each level has its own solution and its needs are specific to that situation. I try to always give myself permission to rethink the problem and find the best solution for that moment. Our personal growth is like watching our kids grow on a daily basis. We can't readily see the changes until we step back. Just because something worked yesterday does NOT mean that it is the right solution for today!
 

DMNinja

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I have found that it goes a little bit deeper than I ever thought. We grow and change all the time. I have found that I have actually become a contortionist, both in my thinking and actions, in order to do things the way that I have always done them in the past. It's silly but... there are those moments when I feel that making more changes is actually betraying myself and my past decisions. It's kind of a "sunk-investment" mindset. I worked so hard at getting to that place. I thought so hard along the way about how to handle things. And now here I am throwing away all those decisions and setting out in a new direction... When I have those feelings, I try to remind myself that water finds its own level. Each level has its own solution and its needs are specific to that situation. I try to always give myself permission to rethink the problem and find the best solution for that moment. Our personal growth is like watching our kids grow on a daily basis. We can't readily see the changes until we step back. Just because something worked yesterday does NOT mean that it is the right solution for today!

That is why I mentioned in the OP that habit change is identity change. We root ourselves down with habits and they are hard to change because we identify with them. So when we do try to change, our identity gets in the way. If anything, this is a strong indication that we become our habits.

I am in the process of not being too attached to one version of myself and I treat my behavior more as an observer rather than a perpetrator. I've started to notice when I do things that are not in accordance to my values, and I do not assign blame or guilt for it. I just make a note, and see how I respond when I bring it up.

It's a slow process but it's been effective.
 

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