It's just a forum

[Andy Black]

Remember when you were a kid playing games or sports with other kids?

Did you ever come across someone who cheated?

Did they ever say "It's just a game."

... meaning it's not "real"

... so cheating doesn't matter?


You know how I'd always respond?

"If it's just a game then why can't you play properly?"



"How you do anything is how you do everything."



You're in a forum, possibly anonymously because you value your privacy.

You might not realise it yet, but you're here to build relationships with other real-life-people.

You might not realise it yet, but business is all about building relationships.



If you're anonymous in an online forum, then you have a choice to be better than you are normally.

You can choose to be the person you strive to be in your "real" life.

Or you can choose to be worse than you would be in real life or, at best, the same.

You could even choose to be an arse-hole if you want.

Don't be so naive to think everyone else isn't forming an opinion of you by the way you interact with others.

Don't be so naive to think you aren't building relationships with other forum members with every single interaction (or lack of) on the forum.



I choose to be the best version of myself that I can be.

I choose to raise the bar for myself, and then be the person in real life that you believe I am from my "persona" in the forum.

Gosh, I even swear in real life. Bet you didn't think that eh?

I choose to be the man I want my sons to grow up to be.



As always, the same choices and actions result in the same outcomes.

Who do you choose to be in here?

It's just a forum right?

 

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[ZF Lee]

This isn't just a forum. It's my stronghold, my base and my quarters.
It gives me knowledge and strength that I would never get anywhere else. All my life I have been listening to liars, gamblers, thieves, losers and defeated souls. People who don't believe you can get rich quick (possible but not easy) or say that being rich is bad, or that you need college to be successful.

This is my fresh start. This forum has given me a freedom I never know existed. An education that far supersedes my college shit.

I doubt I can even apply Fastlane principles to my college garbage-unless I sold past year papers to the kids. But there are already existing systems for that, and I doubt I could make it a long-term Fastlane gig But that's a free idea.

My brother who is in a slowlane college a-levels is so burdened by his studies, so demoralised that at times he can't get out of bed. I told him about the Forum and he refused it. This forum has given me purpose and focus that no one else can give. It's the only place I can look up to for guidance.

 

[Mattie]

I believe in the same principles. I believe when you lie, deceive, and hide things, and think your getting away with something behind the scenes, really we only lie to ourselves. One of the greatest things one of my mentors taught me, is if you're always honest with yourself when other people aren't looking, then you're also honest with others in their presence. I believe many people don't get the idea, human nature is predictable.

When you're in front of a self-actualized group who pretty much has been through the process, the ones following may be deceived, but the one's ahead of you, pretty much know you're still learning and growing.

It makes sense to say: even if we are life-long learners, most of us find out, we still don't know everything, and even if we've spent a lot of time from our experiences, besides gaining knowledge, there's so much yet to be learned and applied to life. The growth process is never ending.

 

[ryanbleau]

one the main reasons I use my real name. I 'm accountable for the good, the bad, and the indifferent I put out in the world. Hopefully it turn in my favor one day.

 

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[ApparentHorizon]

If you're anonymous in an online forum, then you have a choice to be better than you are normally.

You can choose to be the person you strive to be in your "real" life.

Or you can choose to be worse than you would be in real life or, at best, the same.

You could even choose to be an arse-hole if you want.

Don't be so naive to think everyone else isn't forming an opinion of you by the way you interact with others.

Don't be so naive to think you aren't building relationships with other forum members with every single interaction (or lack of) on the forum.

I may be biased, but with anonymity you can get to the core of a person much quicker.

What they do online - when no one is looking - is the same thing they do offline.

 

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[Vigilante]

 

[Vigilante]

We've contaminated your sweet spirit. Welcome to being a mod. You're one of us now.

 

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[Andy Black]

by the way, i am very lazy

since nobody is behind me to kick my a$$, i have to put things in place to push me

this is eben Pagan's discovery : putting conditions in place so action and results are inevitable


look here : http://www.mynotetakingnerd.com/blo...essons-from-the-eben-pagan-management-summit/


quote :

" There is a clear distinction between “doing something” and putting a “condition” in place … it’s not about doing something. It’s about what’s the structure, what’s the condition, what’s the context that I put in place that makes the outcome I want to have happen, happen automatically? "


i can't rely on thinking alone . i rely on thinking to put conditions in place that will force me to do things

I have a simpler hack... have someone rely on you, then it's not about you any more.

 

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[Andy Black]

Who do you want your kids to grow up to be?

Be that person.

Start NOW.

 

[TonyStark]

Don't play with the guy that flips the table in monopoly.

 

[Charnell]

One of the best things about this forum is you don't really need to hide behind an anonymous front. My username is my last name. If you really wanted to you could find me, and I try to be the same as I am online as I am offline.

I talk some shit from time to time, but I also know a thing or two about a thing or two.

 

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[devine]

I'll share a story, a simple reframing:
8 years ago I got to know a guy on a social network, he's from a distant city and we just managed a public page together. No we're best friends and do majority of our businesses together. We talk on daily basis. We affected each other's lives tremendously.

Is this forum different from a social network?
Is social network different from a real life?
Or maybe everything is a real life and it's our attitude that matters?

 

[Ika]

Great thread idea! The comparison is simple yet true.

I choose to be the best version of myself that I can be.

I choose to raise the bar for myself, and be the person in real life that you believe I am from my "persona" in the forum.

That is a really interesting view - You are leading yourself by example!

 

[Andy Black]

You are leading yourself by example!

"Lead yourself by example."

Wow. Never thought of that.


Subject line for next thread sorted...

 

[RogueInnovation]

Yeah,

Firstly, I think people start off scarcity minded, hiding everything from the boogeyman and assuming everyone is someone they have to beat. In the end though you only have to "beat" a select few key competitors, and part of that process is figuring out who they are. If you blame everyone you impress no one. And even with key competitors, don't blame them, look at them objectively. Some competition is healthy, so long as it heads towards better ideas, not weaker ones.

Secondly I think people worry about "authority", worry about getting trampled underneath everything and everybody. Rather ironically the solution is to gain/develop your own sense of authority by trancending those fears. It is an uncomfortable process but you have to get away from fighting phantoms and start focusing on who you can help.

Thirdly, I think people are really struggling to put words to their thoughts, and actions to their instincts, and without formulated thought or decisive action they feel they can't contribute directly so take alternative routes that aren't always well recieved. Unfortunately to fix this requires a lot of self work and it won't be fixed overnight, so be patient with it.

Fourthly, hidden concerns about ethics. It can be easy to look around and see all the bad in your life reflected in things people do in business. A person might carelessly boast about a sale where the followup product was sloppy or something like that and it gives people flashbacks. The solution to this is to control when and where and how your concerns about this arise, because if they erupt at every little thing it can become inhibitive.

Fifthly, implementing business process is kind of boring, so people can carry over angst from that. The solution there is to be self sustaining, make sure your own process is stimulating enough outside of forums.

Lastly, I think people assume that they must submit to "business culture", but that simply isn't true. You can act in parallel with it by growing the right outlooks yourself if you really want. But at the end of the day, that requires a lot of courage to do. When we lack courage, sometimes we play victim. And victimhood leads to supplication or vehemence. You need to develop enough independence that you don't need everyone to pay attention to you, that you can keep a level head and focus on solutions that don't require being showered with praise or comments.

Address all of those things as best you can, and hopefully you can find comfort and confidence

 

[Andy Black]

Don't play with the guy that flips the table in monopoly.

Yeah. Don't BE that guy either.

A litmus test for us all is whether we'd like and get on with ourselves if we met ourselves somehow.

Personally, I think I'd get on with myself like a house on fire. (You may beg to differ and wonder who'd get a look in if we're both talking. Haha.)

 

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[devine]

You're great Andy. Wise words.

"How you do anything is how you do everything."​

I'd send you 10k rep if I had.

 

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[Andy Black]

Sometimes I just can't fathom people...

 

[B V Marlon]

I may be biased, but with anonymity you can get to the core of a person much quicker.

What they do online - when no one is looking - is the same thing they do offline.

You're definitely right, but the Internet seems to magnify it somehow.

 

[Andy Black]

Who do you want your kids to grow up to be?

Be that person.

Start NOW.

 

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[Andy Black]

Guys... If you're bickering then how does that look to other forum members? What's the purpose of having to be right or have the last word?

 

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[Andy Black]

If you get pointed to this thread then it's a last gasp attempt to stop you being an a$$-hat (unless you're new here).

At a guess, you'll ignore the hint and continue on your self-destructive exit out of the forum.

I realise now that some people want to get ejected, but I'm pleased the effort inspired this thread.

 

[Andy Black]

Sometimes I just can't fathom people...

 

[ChickenHawk]

There's lots of wisdom in this thread. No wonder this is such a terrific place.

 

[Tobore]

Great thread!

Like the saying goes...

 

[juan917]

You might not realise it yet, but business is all about building relationships.

This is definitely my weak point. Knowing the right people provides lots of leverage. Being good with people is important

 

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[GMSI7D]

yes business is building relationships as you said Andy



and i go further :


business is mastering people's lazyness

because people are human and as human we are often lazy and we don't want to do things now :

for example : we say we want to lose weight and we don't go to the gym ; we continue to eat cakes

customers are human and they procrastinate to do things , even in their own best interests


by the way, Brian Tracy says that only 2 % of people can force themselves to do things all day long without supervision

we call them " leaders ".


so my point is that , we have to trick people like dogs or kids for their best interest


for example : Jeff Walker's product launch formula is based on sequences and mental triggers to force people to do things and to buy

because we humans are lazy.

 

[GMSI7D]

by the way, i am very lazy

since nobody is behind me to kick my a$$, i have to put things in place to push me

this is eben Pagan's discovery : putting conditions in place so action and results are inevitable


look here : http://www.mynotetakingnerd.com/blo...essons-from-the-eben-pagan-management-summit/


quote :

" There is a clear distinction between “doing something” and putting a “condition” in place … it’s not about doing something. It’s about what’s the structure, what’s the condition, what’s the context that I put in place that makes the outcome I want to have happen, happen automatically? "


i can't rely on thinking alone . i rely on thinking to put conditions in place that will force me to do things

 

[Andy Black]

Bump.

Are you being the best person you can be?

Are you being the person you want to be?

Are you being the man/woman you want your kids to grow up to be?

 

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[Entre Eyes]

Building relationships is very important. You can live on an Island but never let that happen to your business. When you get in a Financially Challenging situation you will see it very clearly.

The Marketing Game is a complex one.

"Tools" that spy on each other.

B.H. Forums that do nothing but talk about how to exploit and break rules yet those forums have very strict rules! They are sharing a link to your work and selling their own on that forum.

This is life. Part of the Game.

Once you go live and share your web property be prepared for your "colleagues" reverse engineering every aspect of it.

Part of the Helpful guidelines at an extremely popular Internet Marketing forum is to see what offer is popular and copy from their Sales Copy to create your own.

If I see a female avatar I immediately think Male no matter what. Sorry my real fellow entrepreneurs.

Over at Warrior Forum the original creator of that forum Allen Says created an all in one community to learn, share, buy and sell and I had my first big success there back then.

Know what his Avatar was?

The Word "Admin". No image.

Do a search right now and you will never find him, no interviews nothing and thousands of us gladly paid the "Bump" fees of his PayPal account over and over . I think there is one bald pic of him but not verified.

He eventually sold his baby Warrior Forum to Freelancer.com for 3.2 Million .

The owner of Plenty of Fish saw all those big dating sites with the fancy matching etc and big fees and made something totally FREE and eventually was making a mint on Adsense.

Plenty of Fish sold to Match Group for $575 million in cash.

Never saw his face until after the sale. Great story.

Do not live on an island with your business but you do not have to be plastered all over the place we just all need to tailor everything to what we are offering and find our happy medium.