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Introverts vs Extroverts (The forum is mostly introverts?)

Are you introvert or extrovert?


  • Total voters
    177

maikooo

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You can’t say ‘neither’... that’s not how it works
Everyone has introvert and extrovert tendencies

When someone says ‘in some cases I’m an introvert,
in some cases I’m an extrovert’ that’s just like ‘okay so you’re a human?'

Introvert / Extrovert refers to where on the spectrum you
fall, and yes... in some cases people are in the middle, but
since our guesses are notoriously inaccurate you would
need to take a Big 5 Assessment to figure that out. Also,
Myers Briggs is kaka. Big 5 is the only scientifically valid
Personality Assment.

Understand Myself - What You Need to Know

Warning, it cost $8, but it’s well worth it. Taking that specific Big 5 Assessment was probably one of the smartest thing I’ve ever done, and I think I even posted about it in the ‘what’s the best value you’ve ever payed for’ thread. Knowing your personality lets you know what types of work you’re best suited for, what you can work on, strengths, weaknesses.



Anyway, to answer the question, I’m neither. Sometimes I’m an int... just kidding. I’m mostly Introverted, but people think I’m extroverted. When it comes to social events, I’m usually the life of the party, so people think ‘extroverted.’ But what they don’t see is how much i need alone time, and too much socialization empties my batteries quickly.
Haha, when you said "neither" ... I was like "not again!!"

What are your favorite outreach channels/tactics?

Thanks for a great summary. Yeah, exactly, it's about the energy, how you build it, what drains it, etc. It gives you so much insight into yourself and you can use it to improve.

Interesting about the Big 5 Assessment. Have you also done the 16personalities? Is it comparable?
 
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maikooo

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The websites results described me to a T.... it was so accurate it was kinda of strange reading it.

Personality type, INTP-A, Logician.
Right!? I was like ... so creepy! Have they been watching me all my life?? :)
 

maikooo

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Man, this hits the nail on the head.

My family says that I need to get out more and socialize. I find socializing with most people to be boring and unfulfilling as most people just talk about partying, things they hate about their job, or the latest episode of American Idol.

It seems like a lot of people have just given up on their dreams. At least with entrepreneurship, there's still a fire within someone to do big things or to go out and fulfill their dreams.
There is no clapping and standing ovation emoji, otherwise I'd flood this reply with them!!
Repeating my question from earlier posts - are there any TMFL meetups chapters around the world?
 

maikooo

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Sounds like it's working for you, so not suggesting that you need to change anything... just gonna share.

The best thing I've learned from @LightHouse in the last couple of months is to strive for success is in all areas of your life. If you get to the top of the business world, but you've got no one left around you... is it really a success? Just something to think about.

Yes, for me, business is the primary focus. However, each week I am now setting goals for family, goals for friends, goals for health and personal finance.

To attempt to quantify it, I would say that my relationship with my wife is 3x better than before I started setting these goals 2 months ago. I've made time for a lunch here and there for friends when I normally wouldn't have thought to. I should probably call my mom more... maybe that'll be a goal for next week.
That's a great way how to tackle the introversion. Work with your strengths - planning and goal orientation to tackle the weakness - social aversion and being a loner. That's what those tests told me as well. Great to hear somebody else is doing it as well!!
 
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maikooo

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100% THIS

To me having small talk with random people talking about the latest movie & sports event bores the sh*t out of me and drains me of all my energy.
However meeting with business oriented ambitious people is super motivating and energizing to me.
Same on my end. I see some people on the meetups jumping from discussion to discussion. I usually find some who look like entreprenerus and spend the whole time with them
 

maikooo

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I do both.

I must be Divergent. :smile2:


Same for me.

I am always looking to connect with groups of people with high entry barriers.

By entry barriers, I mean psychological (e.g. most people are too lazy to sacrifice Fridays to meet XXX people) and financial (e.g. pay cash for TFLF Insiders)

You can socialize a lot, but choose your folks. Go to events or groups heavily invested in business or any kind of fine arts or progressive activities. I went to a meetup a few days ago, where the host was discussing on him opening a wine club. So I learned something about wine and sample some unique liquor that made the local stuff taste saddening. I hardly heard much negative SCRIPTED crap there, even though they had quite a lot of newcomers that day.
Thanks for sharing @ZF Lee ... interesting angle with the "high entry barriers"!
 

maikooo

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Wow I've finally come across another INTJ :smile: seems we're a rare breed!
Hahah oh the pain!

INTJ here as well - welcome in the club!! :)

Hey, after a lot of try-burn-to-ashes experiences with meetup dot com biz groups I only use them for non-business relates activities ... it's better to meet new people through common hobbies than through wanna-be's meetups.

Where do you guys find quality business meetups?
 
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maikooo

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I'm a pretty extroverted person. People who go out with me think it's hilarious because I'll often end up talking to random people and it will be like we've been friends forever. A few weeks ago I talked to a Starbucks barista who I never met before for 10 minutes about mold exposure. I never even think about mold exposure ever.

People tend to open up to me very quickly for some reason.

My ex's sister would always say to me, "you'd be a really attractive guy if you just stopped talking once in a while." Was meant jokingly of course lol. But it's true, sometimes I don't shut up.

I'm usually the loudest person the room, but I never notice until someone tells me. It seems like my voice is just naturally loud.

I don't like being alone for long periods of time. If I have an idea I like bouncing it off other people.

I like things that are tangible. I like to do things rather than think about them. It's like a Shaolin monk said, move in the body not in the mind. I don't like reading. A month ago I counted 75 books I have which I haven't finished, but now the number is probably at 150. I love learning, but I wish I could just download it into my brain. I'm mostly a kinaesthetic learner, I quickly grasp things which include biomechanics.

And speaking of body, mine is always moving, I'm rarely still. It's probably why I'm technically underweight despite the fact that like a zebra (also genetics, when my mom was a model she could eat insane amounts of food and never dieted). I out-eat people who weight twice as much as me. Generally everything in my mind is exposed outward in one way or another.

Buuuuut at the same time, when I'm focused on something I can turn dead quiet. I'm very good at doing things by myself. I generally hate relying on other people. Sometimes this works against me as if I'm doing anything with other people, I'll end up doing everything.

Sometimes I'm quite shy. When I was a child I was really shy and quiet to the point my parents thought I was autistic. Turns out I have Tourettes, which interestingly is comorbid with autism. I get sensory overload sometimes and I need to withdraw from people and activity. Also I carried a lot of mental baggage as my earliest memories are me being told I was different from over kids, and consciously having to suppress my ticks so people don't think something was wrong with me. But I'm learning to let go and unlearn everything my brain was taught.

I can be very up and down. Sometimes I'm absolutely manic, and sometimes I seem really drained. There's been many times when I talked about my depressive tendencies on this forum.

It's interesting though because people usually have an idea that extroverts are social and introverts are shy. Extroversion and introversion is mainly the direction of your perception, not just how other people see you.
Thanks for sharing @Ninjakid That's an incredible summary about yourself. My wife is just like you and we complement each other really well! It's like a ying-yang. I totally recommend you doing the 16personalities test. I mean the ebook costs money but it's a really good investment because they give you tips how to re-balance the imbalances.
cheers!
 

maikooo

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I hear ya.... and agree with you to a degree. I'm hoping to connect with the other go-getters once I'm more comfortable. As for family and such, I'm totally putting starting one or dating until I am able to work part time (with my business system carrying most of the load).

BTW... here's a similar message straight from the horses mouth (or in this case, a Shark's mouth):

Oooh, Mr. Wonderful!! Love that guy :)
 

Primeperiwinkle

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I tested as INTJ for years then I found my tribe, got a divorce, and got a lot more confidence. Now I test as ENTJ. I truly enjoy making people laugh (it’s a jester hat) and being the person who helps my bestie introvert friends be able to relax (because I give no f#cks) but I adore deep conversations. Action is the biggest problem. I’m working on that one now.

Have you guys ever checked out Enneagram? It’s a personality test that describes your weaknesses instead of your strengths. Talk about eerie..

Enneagram Tests (free)

ETA: I also feel like there’s got to be some correlation between how many times you want to edit your own posts and introversion.
 
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amp0193

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Thanks for sharing. Yeah, the "week rule" seems to work.

That's interesting about the images. I have opposite experience because when somebody sends us an image it is always covered to protect us against "weird" content (d*ck picks and such), so I rarely open those. However, if the text message below the image sounds normal, it's a different case.

Ah interesting, I hadn't thought of that. That's good info.

I never send just an image though... It's always accompanied by text.
 

James Cozens

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INTJ here as well - welcome in the club!! :)

Hey, after a lot of try-burn-to-ashes experiences with meetup dot com biz groups I only use them for non-business relates activities ... it's better to meet new people through common hobbies than through wanna-be's meetups.

Where do you guys find quality business meetups?

I've never come across any quality business meetups to be honest. I'm sure they're out there, but I had always assumed that the people really achieving big things tend to shield themselves from the masses while the little guys fight for scraps at the networking events.

The highest quality people I've met have actually been at paid education seminars, etc because they're there to actually learn and are putting their own money into doing so, not jumping on-board for the free social event.

I tested as INTJ for years then I found my tribe, got a divorce, and got a lot more confidence. Now I test as ENTJ. I truly enjoy making people laugh (it’s a jester hat) and being the person who helps my bestie introvert friends be able to relax (because I give no f#cks) but I adore deep conversations. Action is the biggest problem. I’m working on that one now.

Have you guys ever checked out Enneagram? It’s a personality test that describes your weaknesses instead of your strengths. Talk about eerie..

Enneagram Tests (free)

ETA: I also feel like there’s got to be some correlation between how many times you want to edit your own posts and introversion.

Fascinating! I've wondered how changeable our personality types are - e.g. are they hardwired into us from birth, or are they something shaped by our childhood & life experiences or a combination of both...

I feel if I had taken the same test 10 years ago, I would have come out with a completely different result.

Going to check out Enneagram now!
 

• nikita •

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Thanks for sharing! Yep, that sounds like an introvert. What are your favorite outreach tactics/channels?

So far Facebook ads have been working very well for me. Though this is for an iOS app. I shill this guide everywhere, but if you want to get into FB ads, I recommend this so much: Growth Marketing Guide: Advanced Tactics and Hacks
It goes into all growth hacking methods, but the FB ads part is where it shines. Took me from a complete FB ads loser and money-burner to doing quite well.

Previously I tried cold calling for a web design business I had but it was so obviously not for me. People will say stuff like "get out of your comfort zone" and just brave through it, but if there's a business and outreach method that suits you better and doesn't make you want to off yourself every second, then I believe you should disregard that advice.
 
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LightHouse

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I hear ya.... and agree with you to a degree. I'm hoping to connect with the other go-getters once I'm more comfortable.

This is such a poor plan, and forgive me for being frank for a moment. But how do you expect to be more comfortable, without going out and doing it? It's a bullsh*t excuse you are telling yourself so you don't have to do things that are uncomfortable or uncertain.

To further my point, I want to tag in @Raoul Duke to share his story briefly about overcoming the exact same situation and where it has gotten him. I think you will want to read this...
 

ChrisV

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Haha, when you said "neither" ... I was like "not again!!"

What are your favorite outreach channels/tactics?

Thanks for a great summary. Yeah, exactly, it's about the energy, how you build it, what drains it, etc. It gives you so much insight into yourself and you can use it to improve.

Interesting about the Big 5 Assessment. Have you also done the 16personalities? Is it comparable?
I just looked at 16personaliies, and it’s a different scale. They use Myers-Briggs.

Big 5 is:

Extraversion
Openness to Experience
Agreeableness
Conscientiousness
Neuroticism

It’s the most scientifically validated model we have. Jordan Peterson has a Series of good lectures called ‘Personality and it’s Transformations’ (second half especially) an it will tell you why Big 5 is generally a better measure. Myers-Briggs is over 100 years old before modern science was really developed, so it’s predictive utility is limited. Big 5 we can predict income, health, etc
 

TheNamesAngel

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Neither, just like the majority of people probably. I love to be alone sometimes and I love to be with people too.

I've seen that this introvert/extrovert stuff leads to a static mindset in general ("I can't do that because I'm a this or that"), just like most of personality tests and profiles.

Personality tests are mental masturbation anyway. They lead to nothing but to getting stuck in limited beliefs.

My tactics? What makes people buy from me, not what fits my personality lmfao.
Well said .While most people tend to lean more to one or the other we all have our comfort zones.It is your job to push through and not have mental crutches.
 
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chuckypita

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I am an introvert no doubt. I can play the whole outgoing social charming guy well in public but the truth is I hate being around people. It is draining.

I can't wait to get out of almost all social interactions.

"I can't wait to get out of almost all social interactions..." - Why is that?
 

Timmy C

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"I can't wait to get out of almost all social interactions..." - Why is that?

I feel costrophobic in groups, slot of the friends I did have I no longer had anything in common with anyone and pritty negative on life and putting down others.
"I can't wait to get out of almost all social interactions..." - Why is that?

It's not that I don't like people per say, it's just in conversations I feel like I'm in a confined space. And to play the part especially in groups to look extrovert when I'm not drains alot of energy. I like to be alone more often than not. Alone and being lonely are 2 different things I don't feel lonely at all.
 

maikooo

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I tested as INTJ for years then I found my tribe, got a divorce, and got a lot more confidence. Now I test as ENTJ. I truly enjoy making people laugh (it’s a jester hat) and being the person who helps my bestie introvert friends be able to relax (because I give no f#cks) but I adore deep conversations. Action is the biggest problem. I’m working on that one now.

Have you guys ever checked out Enneagram? It’s a personality test that describes your weaknesses instead of your strengths. Talk about eerie..

Enneagram Tests (free)

ETA: I also feel like there’s got to be some correlation between how many times you want to edit your own posts and introversion.
Thanks for sharing @Primeperiwinkle That's very interesting that you have changed from I to E ... I have done 16personalities test regularly for past 3 years and it always rates the same ... anyhow, who knows what happens in a few years ... Thanks for the Enneagram link, will check it out! cheers
 
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maikooo

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I just looked at 16personaliies, and it’s a different scale. They use Myers-Briggs.

Big 5 is:

Extraversion
Openness to Experience
Agreeableness
Conscientiousness
Neuroticism

It’s the most scientifically validated model we have. Jordan Peterson has a Series of good lectures called ‘Personality and it’s Transformations’ (second half especially) an it will tell you why Big 5 is generally a better measure. Myers-Briggs is over 100 years old before modern science was really developed, so it’s predictive utility is limited. Big 5 we can predict income, health, etc
Very interesting, thanks for sharing. I will check the Big 5 as well!
 

maikooo

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I've never come across any quality business meetups to be honest. I'm sure they're out there, but I had always assumed that the people really achieving big things tend to shield themselves from the masses while the little guys fight for scraps at the networking events.

The highest quality people I've met have actually been at paid education seminars, etc because they're there to actually learn and are putting their own money into doing so, not jumping on-board for the free social event.
Good point, thanks! It goes along with what @ZF Lee said about high entry barriers! I will check them out.
 

maikooo

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So far Facebook ads have been working very well for me. Though this is for an iOS app. I shill this guide everywhere, but if you want to get into FB ads, I recommend this so much: Growth Marketing Guide: Advanced Tactics and Hacks
It goes into all growth hacking methods, but the FB ads part is where it shines. Took me from a complete FB ads loser and money-burner to doing quite well.

Previously I tried cold calling for a web design business I had but it was so obviously not for me. People will say stuff like "get out of your comfort zone" and just brave through it, but if there's a business and outreach method that suits you better and doesn't make you want to off yourself every second, then I believe you should disregard that advice.
Thanks for sharing! Awesome resource @• nikita • I will check it out. Haven't had much success with FB ads yet. Yeah, I held a part-time job cold calling for an auto shop during the University and I got so good at writing the script, but calling was a drag :-/

Yeah, "get out of your comfort zone" practice is good from time to time, but sometimes it takes so much effort to focus on our weaknesses to get only marginally better ... this time we can use to hone in on our strengths and leap forward exponentially ...
 
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Fassina

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The big 5 is technically the only scientific personality system.. It can make predictions, but those are scientific predictions like people that are high on conscientiousness tend to make more money.

But that's on average, measuring average people, not outliers like millionaires and the like.

It's useful sure, but more for averages and statistics. It doesn't apply as much for entrepreneurs and people that are not ingrained in the system.

This is an assumption but I'd say people here tend to be: High on conscientiousness, low on extraversion, low on neuroticism, low on agreeableness, and high on openness..
 

Flybye

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Absolutely, but that wasn't the question :) What are your favorite outreach tactics/channels? = what channels you like to use the most and deliver the best results?
Haha sorry. I was in a bit of a hurry first reply.

So I tested as a type Debater (ENTP-A)
Mind: 60% Extraverted- 40% Introverted
Energy: 60% Intuitive- 40% Observant
Nature: 65%Thinking- 35% Feeling
Tactics: 47% Judging - 53% Prospecting
Identity: 67% Assertive - 33% Turbulent

My 60/40 split makes sense. When faced with a new and unfamiliar situation I prefer to sit back and observe. After I have soaked in what I feel is necessary I jump in. I like to describe myself like a steam locomotive. Slow to start moving but once I get up to speed Im hard to slow down.

My typical action with the more experienced is to listen and soak in. Sure, it may look like an introvert action, but why would I not want to listen to the knowledge of the more experienced when they are engaging themselves? I already know what I know. I want to hear their thoughts. If I am in a room filled with the less experienced, I have no problem at all moving forward as an extrovert to share my knowledge with others. I've been told I can be the life of the party one day then be an almost complete mute the next day listening in to the more experienced.

I'm also usually the first person to day "Feelings will create little to no results. Think about what has to be done to solve the issue and do it."

I typically dislike these tests, though. People are far more flexible and can swing back and forth between circumstances to achieve a specific goal.
 
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Raoul Duke

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I hear ya.... and agree with you to a degree. I'm hoping to connect with the other go-getters once I'm more comfortable.

Bass Ackwards thinking. Borrowing Money to Attend 2018 Fastlane Summit

I thought the same as you. Somewhere resting deeper within me, told me otherwise. I went to the summit. But I had failed on so many levels. I talked to a few people. Really didn't "connect".

You really need to do things that make you uncomfortable. Things you HATE doing. When a opportunity presents itself. Are you going to be ready? or Waiting to be comfortable?

I wake up every morning knowing that I have to run M-F. I absolutely hate running. Makes me uncomfortable. Know what happens after that run?

Over the past month in a half, the effect from running, has transferred over into my business, etc.

The members on this forum help people who are here to move forward. Rather you have had some success or a huge failure.

People who haven't done anything actionable. Get put by the wayside. You are a vampire. We want to avoid the time-suckers.
 
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maikooo

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My typical action with the more experienced is to listen and soak in. Sure, it may look like an introvert action, but why would I not want to listen to the knowledge of the more experienced when they are engaging themselves? I already know what I know. I want to hear their thoughts. If I am in a room filled with the less experienced, I have no problem at all moving forward as an extrovert to share my knowledge with others. I've been told I can be the life of the party one day then be an almost complete mute the next day listening in to the more experienced.

Appreciate you coming back, @Flybye Awesome summary ... I totally see myself doing the same ... sometimes I am even too much impatient with the 'unexperienced"

I'm also usually the first person to day "Feelings will create little to no results. Think about what has to be done to solve the issue and do it."
Oh yeah, totally! Action over reaction :)

I typically dislike these tests, though. People are far more flexible and can swing back and forth between circumstances to achieve a specific goal.
Yeah, agree with you to a certain extent ... used to be the same about these tests until they described me to the "t" ... nowadays it's more about finding the right way to improve and help others improve ...
 

maikooo

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The big 5 is technically the only scientific personality system.. It can make predictions, but those are scientific predictions like people that are high on conscientiousness tend to make more money.

But that's on average, measuring average people, not outliers like millionaires and the like.

It's useful sure, but more for averages and statistics. It doesn't apply as much for entrepreneurs and people that are not ingrained in the system.

This is an assumption but I'd say people here tend to be: High on conscientiousness, low on extraversion, low on neuroticism, low on agreeableness, and high on openness..
Thanks @Fassina! Interesting angle ...
 

maikooo

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Bass Ackwards thinking. Borrowing Money to Attend 2018 Fastlane Summit

I thought the same as you. Somewhere resting deeper within me, told me otherwise. I went to the summit. But I had failed on so many levels. I talked to a few people. Really didn't "connect".

You really need to do things that make you uncomfortable. Things you HATE doing. When a opportunity presents itself. Are you going to be ready? or Waiting to be comfortable?

I wake up every morning knowing that I have to run M-F. I absolutely hate running. Makes me uncomfortable. Know what happens after that run?

Over the past month in a half, the effect from running, has transferred over into my business, etc.

The members on this forum help people who are here to move forward. Rather you have had some success or a huge failure.

People who haven't done anything actionable. Get put by the wayside. You are a vampire. We want to avoid the time-suckers.

Yeah, good point @Raoul Duke about getting out of our comfort zone. I totally agree with it from time to time ... for the thrills, for the experience and you never know, the newness may bring something big in the future ... however I don't agree with spending too much time on improving weaknesses if it just doesn't go, if you spend tons of time on getting better at something you suck at and you only get marginally better ... then I would rather spend time on honing on my strengths and how I can use them to help other people ... I think in the end what you are saying is not dismissing experiences and rather giving them a chance immediatelly, taking action and then deciding if it's worth it to invest more time ...
 
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The-J

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I'm an introvert (very much so, in fact) but I'm not scared to get on the phone.

I used to be, though. Once the phone became associated with making money (rather than the pain of having to communicate with another human being), I stopped being afraid and started wanting to be on the phone more.
 

maikooo

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I'm an introvert (very much so, in fact) but I'm not scared to get on the phone.

I used to be, though. Once the phone became associated with making money (rather than the pain of having to communicate with another human being), I stopped being afraid and started wanting to be on the phone more.
Definitely good point! Thanks for the inspiration
 

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