Introvert VS Extrovert

[Mr4213]

I recently saw a post by a member asking if being introverted holds you back in business.

Today I was in Barnes and Noble, and came across a book for introverts. It basically encouraged them to find their strengths and to be proud of being introverted (Nothing wrong with that)

When someone brings up a question like that, I usually assume they are

A) Introverted

and

B) Looking for validation, so they do not have to face their own perceived weakness (or you wouldn't even ask)

So, instead of asking questions like that. I'd like you to ask yourself this question.

If you have two people, person A and person B. And both are exactly the same. They know the same information, have the same business, are located in the same location ect ect. The one and only difference, is that one is extroverted and the other is introverted.

Which do you think would be more successful? Someone who has good interpersonal skills, and is constantly networking. Or the introvert, who has horrible interpersonal skills and never networks because they have difficulty with it?

I have a incredibly hard time imagining a realistic scenario in which being extroverted does not benefit a business. On the other hand, I can easily think of multiple scenarios in which being introverted would hurt a business.

I am not bashing introverts. It does have its pros. For instance, sometimes complete isolation can be good. It helps you focus yourself and your goals. So, rather than say you should be extroverted. I will say you should learn to be both, learn to switch between the two as needed.

Social skills are exactly that, skills. Its even in the word. You can learn them. It takes time and practice. It is definitely a skill worth learning.

 

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[Curtis Randolph]

This person is apparently a bit confused about what introverted and extroverted actually are. Admittedly it is a complex subject that varied opinions abound. I agree that a lack of social skill and/or emotional intelligence is a potential limitation for any business development activity that involves people. Working with people can be VERY important in business development.

Being unskilled or skilled socially is not what introverted or extroverted are though. Those two things are primarily a persons preference as to how they use and recover their energy. Exteoverts get their energy to a great degree from social interaction with others, introverts require alone time to recover their energy. It is also on a sliding scale and you can have extremes on both sides.

One can easily be an introvert and have a high degree of social skill and be an extrovert and be inept socially. ;-)

This is a topic that I have used very productively over decades to assist with the location, creation and development of people based business development systems i.e. small business teams.

Myers–Briggs Type Indicator - Wikipedia

Here is a site that is free and has lots of very user friendly detail that I find most people find approachable (for those that do not geek out about the science of it all)

Free personality test | 16Personalities

I can go on and on about this because I have always found it both fascinating and useful, but will stop here and will continue if/when you or anyone else finds this kind of thing helpful or useful.

 

[jsk29]

So, instead of asking questions like that. I'd like you to ask yourself this question.

If you have two people, person A and person B. And both are exactly the same. They know the same information, have the same business, are located in the same location ect ect. The one and only difference, is that one is extroverted and the other is introverted.

Which do you think would be more successful?

If the information required a lot of solitude to process, the introvert would have an advantage (eg. programming, writing, data analytics, etc).
If the information required a lot of social interaction to process, the extrovert would have an advantage (eg. public speaking, organizing seminar events, outside sales, etc.).

If the business was an actuarial firm, introvert would have an advantage.
If the business was a PR firm, extrovert would have an advantage.

Someone who has good interpersonal skills, and is constantly networking. Or the introvert, who has horrible interpersonal skills and never networks because they have difficulty with it?

I have a incredibly hard time imagining a realistic scenario in which being extroverted does not benefit a business. On the other hand, I can easily think of multiple scenarios in which being introverted would hurt a business.

I am not bashing introverts. It does have its pros. For instance, sometimes complete isolation can be good. It helps you focus yourself and your goals. So, rather than say you should be extroverted. I will say you should learn to be both, learn to switch between the two as needed.

Social skills are exactly that, skills. Its even in the word. You can learn them. It takes time and practice. It is definitely a skill worth learning.

Whoever produced the greatest results and provided the most value for their customers/clients would be more successful (irrelevant of method).

Extroversion/Introversion are a correlation to social skills, not a causation.

Eg:

Both extroverts and introverts must develop their social skills from poor/mediocre to competent (although in different areas).

From my experience, extroverts with poor social skills tend to be poor listeners and talk too much/over people.

And introverts with poor social skills tend to avoid interacting with groups and overly hold back their own views/assertions.

 

[Curtis Randolph]

Extroversion/Introversion are a correlation to social skills, not a causation.

Well said...

 

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[luniac]

Im starting to think its all bullshit.
You are who you wants to be.
My Myers briggs literally changed when my life purpose changed.

 

[Nicoknowsbest]

Know thyself.

Act accordingly.

The rest? Only excuses.

Be socially flexible and know how to talk to people of various social circles and backgrounds.

 

[Curtis Randolph]

Im starting to think its all bullshit.
You are who you wants to be.
My Myers briggs literally changed when my life purpose changed.

Of course. MB or similar "tests" do not define you - you define it/them. It is a cognitive bias test - aka your preferences. It is supposed to reflect who you are so you can use that info - not define you. ;-)
I like it and other similar tests because it shows me who - in a team environment for small business - is interested and engaged in the "Know thyself" admonition and who does not know and/or does not care.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

Im starting to think its all bullshit.

Not true. They've proven introversion/extroversion is genetically predisposed. Read QUIET -- it's the official bible on the subject.

You can't fault someone for being an introvert any much less than faulting someone for writing left handed.

BTW, I am both.

The challenge comes in when you let the label become an excuse. For example, I'm not a big fan of public speaking but I do it despite my introversion. I know to get better at a challenging skill, I need to do it.

 

[Curtis Randolph]

Not true. They've proven introversion/extroversion is genetically predisposed. Read QUIET -- it's the official bible on the subject.

Yes, that is a really good book.

The challenge comes in when you let the label become an excuse.

Amen to that... I am INTJ (or INTP depending on the specific test) and when I went to an executive training course years ago I was the MOST introverted in the group of about 30 execs - go figure. Yet, I have been in sales, sales management, and ops management for man y years- again, go figure. I trained myself to "extrovert" my energy by day and recover my energy by night.

 

[OldFaithful]

I like it and other similar tests because it shows me who...

I like them too because I've seen the benefit of understanding your coworkers/employees/supervisor.

As an example, I once worked at a business that had all new employees take a similar personality test. The management then used that info to tailor how they managed that person. I've always considered that my favorite place to work and that guy was the best boss I'd ever had...probably because he had an insight into my personality right from the beginning...the test results. The only thing that could have improved that situation would be for each of us to have our personality type printed on our cubicle wall, employee ID or emblazoned on our shirts right under the company logo. Then provide everyone a users manual for all 16 personality types.

 

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[OldFaithful]

Amen to that... I am INTJ (or INTP depending on the specific test) and when I went to an executive training course years ago I was the MOST introverted in the group of about 30 execs - go figure. Yet, I have been in sales, sales management, and ops management for man y years- again, go figure. I trained myself to "extrovert" my energy by day and recover my energy by night.

Same for me. INTJ and I consider it valuable to train myself to "extrovert" when necessary. Not easy, exhausting actually, but worth the effort.

 

[GMSI7D]

Yes, that is a really good book.



Amen to that... I am INTJ (or INTP depending on the specific test) and when I went to an executive training course years ago I was the MOST introverted in the group of about 30 execs - go figure.

yes

i am INTJ too

and i have been a quiet reserved person all my life with no dating life .

that's why dating, social gathering , parties and all these irrational humans activities are nightmare for us.

because emotions are not rational.

so we have to adapt to irrational things : human nature with all the waste of time that comes with it

and we are not built for that

that's a lot of work to understand social clues

 

[Denim Chicken]

Some of the best sales people on my team were introverts. All the stereotypes of what an introvert or extrovert SHOULD be good at is nonsense.

A simple way I viewed it, was an introvert feels drained or doesn't feel particularly energized after social situations. They still need and want to be a part of social things however.
Extroverts have a tendency to feel energized and thrive after social situations. You can be both.

 

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[luniac]

Not true. They've proven introversion/extroversion is genetically predisposed. Read QUIET -- it's the official bible on the subject.

You can't fault someone for being an introvert any much less than faulting someone for writing left handed.

BTW, I am both.

The challenge comes in when you let the label become an excuse. For example, I'm not a big fan of public speaking but I do it despite my introversion. I know to get better at a challenging skill, I need to do it.

fair enough ill check it out

 

[GMSI7D]

Some of the best sales people on my team were introverts. All the stereotypes of what an introvert or extrovert SHOULD be good at is nonsense.

A simple way I viewed it, was an introvert feels drained or doesn't feel particularly energized after social situations. They still need and want to be a part of social things however.
Extroverts have a tendency to feel energized and thrive after social situations. You can be both.

both you and i are right from a different point of view

let me explain with an example:

Eben Pagan




1) as i said, he was a total nerd with women because he is a rational guy as an INTP

so he had to work hard and to learn the dating things and the mating rituals of the human beings.

and he launched a dating company after that.

2 ) and like you said, he can talk in front of audiences with ease while being an introvert and he is very skilled at this.

but he admits that he is drained after too much socializing