- Thread starter
- #10
I've always thought that I could get through anything and that I was strong-willed and confident.
However I've really struggled mentally with the situation and level of debt I have. I've felt like a complete failure. I've let my Wife down, my children, my parents and also myself. I've had massive sleep issues and ended up on sleeping tablets. I see other Fathers at the school when I collect my children and think to myself I wish I was them. In fact, I was I just wasn't me.
I'm also not ashamed to admit I've contemplated suicide on numerous occasions. I think the fact that I didn't was because I couldn't do it to my children. It's a selfish thing to do. Not so long ago I even googled whether it was possible to kill yourself but then have the Doctor tell your family it was a heart attack or something. Madness.
I have a loving Wife and Children and just by them being them I'm beginning to get through this. It's not nice having companies chasing you for debts every week. I get a horrible feeling inside when I hear the post coming through the letterbox, is this another debt letter. I could file for bankruptcy but I need to ensure we don't lose our house. It's jointly owned and there's not a great deal of equity compared to my debts and luckily my wife has a good job.
I may still have to file for bankruptcy but I'm going to give it everything I've got to get out of this. The thought that after all the work I've done over the years to end up bankrupt upsets me. Especially for someone with my traits, I'm the one who was always saying I'm going to earn this or do that but to put things bluntly without my wife or help from my parents I'd be homeless and living on the streets now.
I have recognized however though that negative thoughts aren't going to get me anywhere. I've been reading self-help books to reinforce some positivity into my mindset and I've certainly gone past my F*ck You moment. No more negativity and punishing myself for the mistakes I've made in the past.
I can't change anything that I've done, there are some expensive lessons there but I can control where I end up the future and that's where I begin.
If anyone feels like they can offer any help or advice feel free. I'll try and update whenever something meaningful happens but for now, if anyone wants me I'll be mastering facebook ads and growing my brand and I hope that this helps people to NOT make the same mistakes as me.
"If you try chasing two rabbits you won't catch any." This is what I would tell my 20 year old self.
However I've really struggled mentally with the situation and level of debt I have. I've felt like a complete failure. I've let my Wife down, my children, my parents and also myself. I've had massive sleep issues and ended up on sleeping tablets. I see other Fathers at the school when I collect my children and think to myself I wish I was them. In fact, I was I just wasn't me.
I'm also not ashamed to admit I've contemplated suicide on numerous occasions. I think the fact that I didn't was because I couldn't do it to my children. It's a selfish thing to do. Not so long ago I even googled whether it was possible to kill yourself but then have the Doctor tell your family it was a heart attack or something. Madness.
I have a loving Wife and Children and just by them being them I'm beginning to get through this. It's not nice having companies chasing you for debts every week. I get a horrible feeling inside when I hear the post coming through the letterbox, is this another debt letter. I could file for bankruptcy but I need to ensure we don't lose our house. It's jointly owned and there's not a great deal of equity compared to my debts and luckily my wife has a good job.
I may still have to file for bankruptcy but I'm going to give it everything I've got to get out of this. The thought that after all the work I've done over the years to end up bankrupt upsets me. Especially for someone with my traits, I'm the one who was always saying I'm going to earn this or do that but to put things bluntly without my wife or help from my parents I'd be homeless and living on the streets now.
I have recognized however though that negative thoughts aren't going to get me anywhere. I've been reading self-help books to reinforce some positivity into my mindset and I've certainly gone past my F*ck You moment. No more negativity and punishing myself for the mistakes I've made in the past.
I can't change anything that I've done, there are some expensive lessons there but I can control where I end up the future and that's where I begin.
If anyone feels like they can offer any help or advice feel free. I'll try and update whenever something meaningful happens but for now, if anyone wants me I'll be mastering facebook ads and growing my brand and I hope that this helps people to NOT make the same mistakes as me.
"If you try chasing two rabbits you won't catch any." This is what I would tell my 20 year old self.
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum:
Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.
Last edited: