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How to get unstuck

Anything related to matters of the mind

Andy Black

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If a few weeks go by and you're still talking about doing the same thing then you're stuck.

Often, you already know what you should do, yet you aren't doing it.

You've three options, all equally valid:
  1. Figure out why you're not doing what you know you should be doing, and remove the blockage.
  2. F*ck why and JFDI.
  3. Drop it from your to-do list and stop talking about it.
 
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Falko

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If a few weeks go by and you're still talking about doing the same thing then you're stuck.

Never thought about it this way... many tend to think few weeks is a short time. But we can actually change/do a lot of things during "short time". Thanks for the wake up call.
 

Drwakiza

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Forgetting about winning the game and JFDI for the pleasure of playing the game, for the pleasure of learning and growing. This helped me actually get started and forget about people's opinion.

I guess changing the end goal, or not thinking about it so much that we are afraid of the road ahead, helps us enjoying the small steps and not being afraid of the potential outcome (which usually the most scary is not to lose but to actually win..)

I guess there is no right answer here, just answers that some people will find right for themselve.

Thanks for creating a thread again @Andyblack
 

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Fine!
Andy, can you please repeat that every month for me! ;-)
 
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Jerma

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I have a perspective for the overthinkers out there (myself included). I think there are many different ways to get stuck. Two that come to mind, post-decision and pre-decision.

a) Post-decision: you 100% decide to do something, but whenever you sit down to do it, a lot of resistance comes out of nowhere. Then you get distracted by something, and nothing gets done (procrastination). The "stuckness" manifests itself at the moment when you try to perform the action. Being stuck like this is very frustrating IMO because it doesn't feel like it makes much sense because there is no conflict in the conscious mind. "I should be able to do this." I think this means that there is some kind of subconscious reason or fear interfering. Both options 1 and 2 are good here, but option 1 requires a lot of self-awareness.

b) Pre-decision: you actually can't decide something, or you go back and forth between some options. E.G. "Should I pursue market A or market B? Should I quit my job or not?". The "stuckness" is at the conscious level when trying to make the best decision. I used to get stuck in that way often, and I used to get very annoyed when I heard someone say something like, "just do it."

I was thinking something along those lines :
Just do what exactly? There is more than one option! You don't understand, it's more complicated than that! I'm juggling like 100 variables in my head trying to figure it out. It can't be reduced to "just doing it." My problems are not that simple. I need more information, not an inspirational poster quote.

Over time, I have gone full circle and come to appreciate the wisdom of "just do it." The thing that helped me change my mind was the work of L.A. Paul on transformative experiences. She makes great arguments in her book that there are real (epistemic) limits to what you can figure out by thinking when trying to make life-changing decisions. A good summary podcast about it:
View: https://youtu.be/CXHfwbELrmw?t=93


So, if you are stuck but want to change, you need to take a leap of faith and value the discovery of the unknown and JFDI. You probably won't get there by thinking about it endlessly.
 

Andy Black

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I have a perspective for the overthinkers out there (myself included). I think there are many different ways to get stuck. Two that come to mind, post-decision and pre-decision.

a) Post-decision: you 100% decide to do something, but whenever you sit down to do it, a lot of resistance comes out of nowhere. Then you get distracted by something, and nothing gets done (procrastination). The "stuckness" manifests itself at the moment when you try to perform the action. Being stuck like this is very frustrating IMO because it doesn't feel like it makes much sense because there is no conflict in the conscious mind. "I should be able to do this." I think this means that there is some kind of subconscious reason or fear interfering. Both options 1 and 2 are good here, but option 1 requires a lot of self-awareness.

b) Pre-decision: you actually can't decide something, or you go back and forth between some options. E.G. "Should I pursue market A or market B? Should I quit my job or not?". The "stuckness" is at the conscious level when trying to make the best decision. I used to get stuck in that way often, and I used to get very annoyed when I heard someone say something like, "just do it."

I was thinking something along those lines :


Over time, I have gone full circle and come to appreciate the wisdom of "just do it." The thing that helped me change my mind was the work of L.A. Paul on transformative experiences. She makes great arguments in her book that there are real (epistemic) limits to what you can figure out by thinking when trying to make life-changing decisions. A good summary podcast about it:
View: https://youtu.be/CXHfwbELrmw?t=93


So, if you are stuck but want to change, you need to take a leap of faith and value the discovery of the unknown and JFDI. You probably won't get there by thinking about it endlessly.
Great post, thanks for sharing.

“Overthinking is the art of solving problems you don’t have.”

Our job as entrepreneurs and business owners is to to solve the *right* problems.
 

LiveEntrepreneur

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If a few weeks go by and you're still talking about doing the same thing then you're stuck.

Often, you already know what you should do, yet you aren't doing it.

You've two options, and both are valid.

  1. Figure out why you're not doing what you know you should be doing, and remove the blockage.

  2. F*ck why and JFDI.
But Andy, I don't have the 100% guaranteed step by step instructions or your money back.... (just kidding) I think it just has to do with a lack of confidence, I struggle with this big time. I've been working on building my confidence in my decisions and just going for it.
 
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LiveEntrepreneur

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Forgetting about winning the game and JFDI for the pleasure of playing the game, for the pleasure of learning and growing. This helped me actually get started and forget about people's opinion.

I guess changing the end goal, or not thinking about it so much that we are afraid of the road ahead, helps us enjoying the small steps and not being afraid of the potential outcome (which usually the most scary is not to lose but to actually win..)

I guess there is no right answer here, just answers that some people will find right for themselve.

Thanks for creating a thread again @Andyblack
I think this is huge, focusing on today and today only. I personally get anxiety about thinking about the future, and whether or not I'll make it, all the work required to become successful, etc.
 

Drwakiza

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Mate, I also sometimes gets anxiety thinking about the future, probably because of the voice saying « what if I fail » but then I have to tell myself « what if I succeed? ». The answer to that question is what makes it worth the try, or not
I think this is huge, focusing on today and today only. I personally get anxiety about thinking about the future, and whether or not I'll make it, all the work required to become successful, etc.
 

Vanda

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If a few weeks go by and you're still talking about doing the same thing then you're stuck.

Often, you already know what you should do, yet you aren't doing it.

You've two options, and both are valid.

  1. Figure out why you're not doing what you know you should be doing, and remove the blockage.

  2. F*ck why and JFDI.

EDIT: You've got 3 options.

3. Drop it from your to-do list and stop talking about it.
Yep, this is "the advice"

An idea came to me to improve my business. There are some questions that I would like to answer, but the answers are short and do not justify writing an article for the blog. Also I explain things better by talking than writing. I thought to make small videos with these questions and answers for YouTube. The problem is, I freeze in front of the camera. I can do Qigong vídeos for my courses, it is easy because I'm moving at the same time as I'm explaining - it goes very well. But to be there, stand... and just speak ...this is my big block. Maybe I JFDI. :)
 
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Joejordan95

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Guilty of Overthinking. It's almost crippled me the last few days. Have realised I need to consider the future but work on what I can today. Currently removing sugar and sweets from my diet committing to waking up early at the same time everyday and meditating- not that this will lead me success but it will give me a small win that I do in fact have control, that I can in fact focus for small amounts of time.

We'll see if I can then build up this focus muscle and apply it to the places in my life that need it
 

WJK

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If a few weeks go by and you're still talking about doing the same thing then you're stuck.

Often, you already know what you should do, yet you aren't doing it.

You've two options, and both are valid.

  1. Figure out why you're not doing what you know you should be doing, and remove the blockage.

  2. F*ck why and JFDI.

EDIT: You've got 3 options.

3. Drop it from your to-do list and stop talking about it.
I like #3. A lot of times those items are what I THINK I should be doing rather than what is really important. That's why it keeps getting shuffled to the bottom of the list.
 

Andy Black

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I like #3. A lot of times those items are what I THINK I should be doing rather than what is really important. That's why it keeps getting shuffled to the bottom of the list.
Yes, #3 is my favourite!

"You can complete a project by dropping it."
Arianna Huffington
 
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