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How to fix a broken mindset?

Anything related to matters of the mind

Taktik

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Hi guys,

after trying to start a business for several years now and not really getting anything together except for one, I finally understand that the biggest problem holding me back not only in business but in life in general is my mindset.

I'm just not yet the person to build a successful company long term and stick with it when things get tough.

I'm in the process of starting a new company at the moment. The closer I get to actually implementing my plans, the more resistance, doubts, etc. I encounter, which are extremely hindering me and have brought progress to a standstill. In the last eight months I have made progress that I could have easily done in less than half the time. It has gotten to the point where my inertia is giving me depression.

The question now is how I can change my mindset, to become the person, I need to be to reach my goals, so to speak. I know it won't work overnight, but maybe you guys have some tips for me on how to make it work in the medium to long term, while still trying to get a business going. I see this as a work-in-progress, optimally getting better with time, step by step.

Thanks.
 
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Marigold

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Hi guys,

after trying to start a business for several years now and not really getting anything together except for one, I finally understand that the biggest problem holding me back not only in business but in life in general is my mindset.

I'm just not yet the person to build a successful company long term and stick with it when things get tough.

I'm in the process of starting a new company at the moment. The closer I get to actually implementing my plans, the more resistance, doubts, etc. I encounter, which are extremely hindering me and have brought progress to a standstill. In the last eight months I have made progress that I could have easily done in less than half the time. It has gotten to the point where my inertia is giving me depression.

The question now is how I can change my mindset, to become the person, I need to be to reach my goals, so to speak. I know it won't work overnight, but maybe you guys have some tips for me on how to make it work in the medium to long term, while still trying to get a business going. I see this as a work-in-progress, optimally getting better with time, step by step.

Thanks.
I can relate. For me it's just focusing on this hour or this day and not being overwhelmed by it all. I also completely surrender to the fact that some days and weeks I just won't feel like it. I'm a woman so that's not likely to apply to you as much.

But yeah, every day is a step forward. Mindset is a constant work in progress. Sounds cliché as F*ck but it's about the journey.

Rather than tell yourself you're not the person to build a successful company long term and stick with it, tell yourself you're becoming the person that is building a company. You won't ever 'get there' anyway.

Stop overthinking it and focus on this present moment and what's the action you need to take right now, not tomorrow or next month or next year.
 

Andy Black

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Hi guys,

after trying to start a business for several years now and not really getting anything together except for one, I finally understand that the biggest problem holding me back not only in business but in life in general is my mindset.

I'm just not yet the person to build a successful company long term and stick with it when things get tough.

I'm in the process of starting a new company at the moment. The closer I get to actually implementing my plans, the more resistance, doubts, etc. I encounter, which are extremely hindering me and have brought progress to a standstill. In the last eight months I have made progress that I could have easily done in less than half the time. It has gotten to the point where my inertia is giving me depression.

The question now is how I can change my mindset, to become the person, I need to be to reach my goals, so to speak. I know it won't work overnight, but maybe you guys have some tips for me on how to make it work in the medium to long term, while still trying to get a business going. I see this as a work-in-progress, optimally getting better with time, step by step.

Thanks.
1) I think the change *can* happen overnight.

2) I think you’re likely in your own way.

I found it easy to get out of my own way by putting other people first:

“Is there someone I can help right now? Am I not doing them a disservice by not getting out there, today?”

Maybe listen to “Who have you helped?” in my signature.
 

Andy Black

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I agree with Andy, seek to serve. Don't make it about you but about your people and you'll get immediate momentum.
“Seek to Serve.”

Nice!
 
D

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Read "Personality isn't permanent".

It's a book that helps you reframe the traumas in your past which influence your present, then help you build the future you want by changing your mindset and encouraging you to identify with who you would like to be, and not who you were.

I am almost finished with the book and plan on writing a thread about it because what I found there was absolutely gold.
 

Marigold

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Read "Personality isn't permanent".

It's a book that helps you reframe the traumas in your past which influence your present, then help you build the future you want by changing your mindset and encouraging you to identify with who you would like to be, and not who you were.

I am almost finished with the book and plan on writing a thread about it because what I found there was absolutely gold.
I took Jordan Peterson's Understand Yourself questionnaire after listening to him speak about entrepreneurs and sales people and it was deeply fascinating/disturbing. I recommend it.

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89Vpqm2IaPE
 
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Kid

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Its unconscious requirement that you're trying to go against.
Find what that requirement is.
Decide if you want to shift up and fulfill it
or decide to leave it.
 
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MakeItHappen

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Read "The Greatest Salesman in the World"

If you read it right it will take you 10 months to read it.

For me, it's a game-changer when it comes to mindset.

BTW the book is about mindset. The teachings also apply if you are not a salesman.

 

AceVentures

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I've found personally when I'm in a DOD, feedback becomes really important.

Either talk about what you're doing with people, or begin to reward yourself for small wins. It's only in retrospect that you see the purpose in what you've done. Become better at recognizing these small wins and how they contribute to your ultimate effort.

You didn't lose in the past 8 months, you discovered in the process of doing what you can now do in half the time. Thats progress. That's learning.

Personally I've learned that being hard on myself isn't what helps me. Being loving and kind to myself is what brightens my perspective and allows me to push through.
 

Alfie321

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One thing that helped me was having positive past references in other areas that hard works pays off eventually. Specifically going out and getting better at social skills, coming from a background of a lack of them.

If I could make a random girl like me out of nowhere in 20 minutes through years of hard work, If people thought I was cool without having money and wanted me to hang out with them, how can I not build a business? If I could do all of those things normal people think only happen in movies, then there's no reason I could not do this :)
 
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Taktik

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Read "The Greatest Salesman in the World"

If you read it right it will take you 10 months to read it.

For me, it's a game-changer when it comes to mindset.

BTW the book is about mindset. The teachings also apply if you are not a salesman.


Thanks for the tip, I will read the book.

I've found personally when I'm in a DOD, feedback becomes really important.

Either talk about what you're doing with people, or begin to reward yourself for small wins. It's only in retrospect that you see the purpose in what you've done. Become better at recognizing these small wins and how they contribute to your ultimate effort.

You didn't lose in the past 8 months, you discovered in the process of doing what you can now do in half the time. Thats progress. That's learning.

Personally I've learned that being hard on myself isn't what helps me. Being loving and kind to myself is what brightens my perspective and allows me to push through.

I have heard so much about small wins, but never really put it into practice. Thanks for the reminder, you are absolutely right. I have to do that now.

I like, how you reframed the last eight months, that is the way to go for me.

Being hard on myself is the standard practice for me, but it never really did me any good - the opposite is true. How are you loving and kind to yourself? Do you maybe have any tips?

One thing that helped me was having positive past references in other areas that hard works pays off eventually. Specifically going out and getting better at social skills, coming from a background of a lack of them.

If I could make a random girl like me out of nowhere in 20 minutes through years of hard work, If people thought I was cool without having money and wanted me to hang out with them, how can I not build a business? If I could do all of those things normal people think only happen in movies, then there's no reason I could not do this :)

This is a very good way to see it. Thank you for that.
Do you have any tips on how to become better at social skills?
 

VPchris

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Read "Personality isn't permanent".

It's a book that helps you reframe the traumas in your past which influence your present, then help you build the future you want by changing your mindset and encouraging you to identify with who you would like to be, and not who you were.

I am almost finished with the book and plan on writing a thread about it because what I found there was absolutely gold.

I love that! It's audacious to think that our life is fixed because of our personality. That we can somewhat be a victim of that.

Let me share with you a couple of ideas that changed the game for me (from the book 'Crazy Good' by Steve Chandler)

- Choices. You have a choice. Do it, or don't. Just make the decision, nobody is going to do it for you.

- 'You don't have to believe in yourself. Just do the work. Test. Experiment. Go out there and do it.' --> Are you waiting for the belief first? Then it probably won't happen.

- Do one minute a day. You can do one minute. Anyone can. Of the thing that is calling you, do that.

-Get rid of 'being busy' and ask yourself: If I could only do ONE thing right now, that would make an impact on my business. What would that be?

- And the biggest one of all: You do not need to create a positive belief or mindset about the thing you want to do or achieve - You Just Go Do It. Over and over again until you get it. Like riding a bike. Or learning to walk.

Hope that helps, it's not always easy!!
 

eruj22

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How are you loving and kind to yourself? Do you maybe have any tips?
It wasn't meant for me but still maybe I can help you. For the past month I have been working with a book called 'You can heal your life' and in it there are 2 really powerful exercises that I think can help you. First one is to say to yourself in front of the mirror: "I love you and accept you the way you are." I do it when I brush my teeth in the morning and in the evening. The second exercise is that you constantly repeat in your mind: "I appreciate myself" and do this few hundred times in a single day; it becomes your mantra.
Maybe these exercises sound a little bit silly but their effect with repetition is powerful. Just try it for at least a week and see where it gets you. The power lies in consistency. Through constant practice you start to believe the statements and your view of yourself slowly shifts toward loving yourself.

For changing your mindset I can recommend you Mindset 101 from Tom Bilyeu. He tells you step by step how to rewire your brain into growth mindset. But it's up to you to do the work.
 
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Christopher104

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I'm just not yet the person to build a successful company long term and stick with it when things get tough.
That kind of thinking will destroy your confidence. you need to change "I'm just not yet the person" to "I will be".
I'm in the process of starting a new company at the moment. The closer I get to actually implementing my plans, the more resistance, doubts, etc. I encounter, which are extremely hindering me and have brought progress to a standstill.
You came all this way and now you're afraid of rejection? So what if your company fails, that's the beauty of being an entrepreneur. You get to learn from your mistakes and grow as a person from them. You think that's possible in a corporate world? In a job you are shunned and shamed for failure. Fail too many times and you're fired.
how I can change my mindset, to become the person, I need to be to reach my goals, so to speak.
your goal is to become a stronger person at the end of the day than when you woke up this morning. Tell yourself to man up and quit being a work/risk avoidant little boy. While you're having to attend a job and sacrifice your time to make someone else richer, they laugh at you behind closed doors and talk about how stupid you are.

anytime you feel resistance you need to tell yourself:
"Shut up, quit acting like a little bitch, and get it done."
 

Raoul Duke

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Read "The Greatest Salesman in the World"

If you read it right it will take you 10 months to read it.

For me, it's a game-changer when it comes to mindset.

BTW the book is about mindset. The teachings also apply if you are not a salesman.


10 months?!?!?!?!

lgkV60a.gif
 

No.1

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Read "Personality isn't permanent".

It's a book that helps you reframe the traumas in your past which influence your present, then help you build the future you want by changing your mindset and encouraging you to identify with who you would like to be, and not who you were.

I am almost finished with the book and plan on writing a thread about it because what I found there was absolutely gold.

A psychologist friend of mine used to say "You're not your past, you're what you do with it".
 
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Everyman

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Hi Taktik,

why did you name the thread 'how to fix a broken mindset?' - why do you feel (or think) it is broken and needs fixing?

The question now is how I can change my mindset, to become the person, I need to be to reach my goals, so to speak.

Why do you want to reach these goals? Why are they important to you?
 

bracknelson

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A broken mindset means to live your life with constant fear so everybody wants to fix their mindset. In a fixed mindset, people believe their qualities are fixed traits and therefore cannot change.
Some effective ways help you to upgrade your mindset:
  • Change your Self-Talk
  • Change your Language
  • Create new habits to support your mindset change
  • Determine the mindset you need and act as if
  • Surround yourself with people that match your desired mindset
  • Jump out of your comfort zone
 

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