Genuinely caring and being interested in other people.

[RyanK OnMyWay]

I am currently reading the 7 habits of highly effective people (my number 1 recommended book).

One thing that I want to be a prominent part of my character is caring about other people and being interested in their story.

I am putting deep thought into this and am in some turmoil.

I don't always want to know the other person's story and sometimes I just don't care. I hate to admit that but it is true.

HOWEVER, I WANT to care about other people and I WANT to be interested in them. I feel like this isn't enough. I want to genuinely have these desires. Is it a fake it till you make it type deal? If I actually listen to someone else and try to understand them, but I don't want to is it good enough? Are my actions that I take all that matter?

In short I am trying to figure out how to BECOME the person I WANT to be.

I'll keep you updated with anything I come across.

 

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[Andy Black]

I am currently reading the 7 habits of highly effective people (my number 1 recommended book).

One thing that I want to be a prominent part of my character is caring about other people and being interested in their story.

I am putting deep thought into this and am in some turmoil.

I don't always want to know the other person's story and sometimes I just don't care. I hate to admit that but it is true.

HOWEVER, I WANT to care about other people and I WANT to be interested in them. I feel like this isn't enough. I want to genuinely have these desires. Is it a fake it till you make it type deal? If I actually listen to someone else and try to understand them, but I don't want to is it good enough? Are my actions that I take all that matter?

In short I am trying to figure out how to BECOME the person I WANT to be.

I'll keep you updated with anything I come across.

When I talk to people I assume there's something fascinating about them and something I can learn from them.

It's up to me to try and find both.



It really reminds me of that Henry Ford quote. If you think people are nice and interesting, then you're right. If you think they're not, then you're right too.

If you walk around thinking everyone's an a-hole... then guess what, they'll be an a-hole to you and you'll be right.

If you walk around thinking everyone's amazing with fabulous stories... then guess what...




Related video?

• Talk to everyone

 

[Jake]

Maybe try breaking down your "why"? Why do you want to care? Why should you care? We can learn something from everyone but maybe that isn't enough.

If you're going to sell people products you MUST care about them. What are their needs? We learn this by speaking to them. Define a demographic that you think you may serve now or in the future. Start talking. You may find out that you have more in common with them than you thought. You may start to care, you may start to become more like your "market". Then you begin to uncover their needs, wants, desires. When you begin to associate with a group of people the caring may come naturally.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

I hate to admit that but it is true.

Selfishness is normal human behavior. I wouldn't be too worried about fighting something we all fight.

 

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[RyanK OnMyWay]

Selfishness is normal human behavior. I wouldn't be too worried about fighting something we all fight.

Thanks MJ, that gives me some peace of mind.

I have found the phrase that better articulates what I am feeling:

"Cognitive Dissonance"
-the state of having inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, or attitudes, especially as relating to behavioral decisions and attitude change.

 

[eTox]

The title reminded me of "How To Win Friends And Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. Your thoughts on that book?

 

[RyanK OnMyWay]

The title reminded me of "How To Win Friends And Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. Your thoughts on that book?

Great book, HOWEVER...
It is step number 2. It is technique.

What is step number 1?
Fine tuning your core beliefs. Your core beliefs are from which your behaviors and attitudes flow.

Techniques are quick fixes.
For sustained wealth and prosperity (& not just money),
I believe that you need to change who you are and how you look at things.

For more information on this give the 7 habits a go. Life changing stuff in there.

 

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[RyanK OnMyWay]

Great book, HOWEVER...
It is step number 2. It is technique.

What is step number 1?
Fine tuning your core beliefs. Your core beliefs are from which your behaviors and attitudes flow.

Techniques are quick fixes.
For sustained wealth and prosperity (& not just money),
I believe that you need to change who you are and how you look at things.

For more information on this give the 7 habits a go. Life changing stuff in there.

This actually reminded me of something after I got done
reading How to Win Friends and Influence People.

As I put it into practice I felt manipulative and insincere.
It was one of the first books I have read anywhere near this type of subject and
so it was my only basis.

Now knowing that I am using these techniques because
I'm a good person and want to help people out,
it does not feel insidious anymore.

 

[Demigod]

I am currently reading the 7 habits of highly effective people (my number 1 recommended book).

One thing that I want to be a prominent part of my character is caring about other people and being interested in their story.

I am putting deep thought into this and am in some turmoil.

I don't always want to know the other person's story and sometimes I just don't care. I hate to admit that but it is true.

HOWEVER, I WANT to care about other people and I WANT to be interested in them. I feel like this isn't enough. I want to genuinely have these desires. Is it a fake it till you make it type deal? If I actually listen to someone else and try to understand them, but I don't want to is it good enough? Are my actions that I take all that matter?

In short I am trying to figure out how to BECOME the person I WANT to be.

I'll keep you updated with anything I come across.

You would start in bits. If you were born with everything you ever needed, you most likely could end up feeling like you should only care about those whom you know.

However to care about people takes practise so begin with thinking about what value you can offer to people. When you meet them, strike up a conversation that borders on their interests and how you can meet those.

With time you may begin having certain amounts of empathy towards theses people and that's just the start..

Hope this helps

 

[RyanK OnMyWay]

You would start in bits. If you were born with everything you ever needed, you most likely could end up feeling like you should only care about those whom you know.

However to care about people takes practise so begin with thinking about what value you can offer to people. When you meet them, strike up a conversation that borders on their interests and how you can meet those.

With time you may begin having certain amounts of empathy towards theses people and that's just the start..

Hope this helps

Definitely did help, realizing now it's a process. I actually just thanked wikipedia for the information after I closed it out . I guess it's starting to work

 

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[Writer]

I am currently reading the 7 habits of highly effective people (my number 1 recommended book).

One thing that I want to be a prominent part of my character is caring about other people and being interested in their story.

I am putting deep thought into this and am in some turmoil.

I don't always want to know the other person's story and sometimes I just don't care. I hate to admit that but it is true.

HOWEVER, I WANT to care about other people and I WANT to be interested in them. I feel like this isn't enough. I want to genuinely have these desires. Is it a fake it till you make it type deal? If I actually listen to someone else and try to understand them, but I don't want to is it good enough? Are my actions that I take all that matter?

In short I am trying to figure out how to BECOME the person I WANT to be.

I'll keep you updated with anything I come across.

Volunteer. It will change you, I promise. You will see both sides of the coin, nice amazing human beings trying to help their community or their family, and SOBs that abandon their kids to do drugs or whatever.