lowtek
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On LinkedIn I get a fair amount of connection requests from web dev types (no offense to you guys <3 ), and invariably I get spammed with an email or direct message within 24 hours of accepting their request. These emails run the gamut from bad to terrible, but one has stood out as being particularly bad. I'll relay it here:
Hello,
Now that we are connected I wanted to tell you more about who I am.
I'm an entrepreneur, tra-digital marketer and CEO of XXX . XXX is a tra-digital advertising agency that blends digital with traditional to achieve better results. I have worked with over 2,500 clients strategizing, implementing, analyzing and optimizing successful marketing campaigns and I want to do this for you too.
Some of my results include:
* Helping a failing online education company emerge as a $100M company
* Responsible for cracking the code behind optimizing traditional media which has helped grow business’s by a 10x factor.
* I've grown agencies paid media budgets by 3x and have managed over $1,000,000 in monthly ad spend.
* Interviewed successful founders, CEOs, and entrepreneurs for Net Growth Now, a top-ranked author on search engine journal, website magazine, search marketing standard, pingzine and many more while infusing those lessons into clients’ businesses
* I'm the host of TraDigital Academy, a podcast which teaches traditional and digital marketing to aspiring advertisers.
* I have over sixty 5 star testimonials on my linkedin account from people like Neil Patel, Rand Fishkin from Moz and many more.
I'm not bragging, I'm applying for a job. I want to work with you and help grow your business by growth hacking it to the next level.
In fact I want to give you a free copy of my new book I wrote called "how to skyrocket your sales using snapchat ads" . I spent over $45k to discover how to drive quality leads for under $3 using snapchat ads for the credit repair and home financing vertical. These tactics can be applied to any industry and vertical and is a valuable tool to crush it in your 2019 marketing efforts.
If any of this resonates with you please contact me for a complimentary strategy call on how to growth hack your business.
Sincerely,
Dooshey McGobble
Why is this terrible, you may ask?
It's totally "me" centered. This guy loves himself, and it shows. He thinks he's incredible. He thinks he's the greatest thing to digital marketing since the invention of back links. The only problem?
It's total BS. 60 reviews? Try only 41. Yeah, I checked. From Neil Patel? Not a chance, though to be fair, he does have one from Rand Fishkin.
You'd think a big time baller that gets endorsed by Neil Patel would have a strong media presence, yeah?
Try again. No Facebook page that I could find.
Well since we met on LinkedIn, surely his game is strong. 13 followers for his business page... OK, I guess we all have to start somewhere.
YouTube, maybe? 3 subs with just as many videos. Hmmmm...
Surely he's a Warlord of Twitter...? Nah, only 40 followers and NO tweets.
But he's a CEO of a business that manages $1,000,000 a month in ad spend... surely that must mean he has a team of employees, right? Only 2 employees on LinkedIn, and 1 of them is credited as being the bartender, the other is a "brand ambassador" who works for a dozen other ... brands.
Definitely a professional.
Folks, writing cold email when you're trying to build a service business isn't a sin.
Lying your a$$ off in a desperate attempt to get attention is most definitely a sin.
Make sure your cold emails are short, YOU focused, and truthful. And don't call yourself a CEO if you manage a bartender.
Hello,
Now that we are connected I wanted to tell you more about who I am.
I'm an entrepreneur, tra-digital marketer and CEO of XXX . XXX is a tra-digital advertising agency that blends digital with traditional to achieve better results. I have worked with over 2,500 clients strategizing, implementing, analyzing and optimizing successful marketing campaigns and I want to do this for you too.
Some of my results include:
* Helping a failing online education company emerge as a $100M company
* Responsible for cracking the code behind optimizing traditional media which has helped grow business’s by a 10x factor.
* I've grown agencies paid media budgets by 3x and have managed over $1,000,000 in monthly ad spend.
* Interviewed successful founders, CEOs, and entrepreneurs for Net Growth Now, a top-ranked author on search engine journal, website magazine, search marketing standard, pingzine and many more while infusing those lessons into clients’ businesses
* I'm the host of TraDigital Academy, a podcast which teaches traditional and digital marketing to aspiring advertisers.
* I have over sixty 5 star testimonials on my linkedin account from people like Neil Patel, Rand Fishkin from Moz and many more.
I'm not bragging, I'm applying for a job. I want to work with you and help grow your business by growth hacking it to the next level.
In fact I want to give you a free copy of my new book I wrote called "how to skyrocket your sales using snapchat ads" . I spent over $45k to discover how to drive quality leads for under $3 using snapchat ads for the credit repair and home financing vertical. These tactics can be applied to any industry and vertical and is a valuable tool to crush it in your 2019 marketing efforts.
If any of this resonates with you please contact me for a complimentary strategy call on how to growth hack your business.
Sincerely,
Dooshey McGobble
Why is this terrible, you may ask?
It's totally "me" centered. This guy loves himself, and it shows. He thinks he's incredible. He thinks he's the greatest thing to digital marketing since the invention of back links. The only problem?
It's total BS. 60 reviews? Try only 41. Yeah, I checked. From Neil Patel? Not a chance, though to be fair, he does have one from Rand Fishkin.
You'd think a big time baller that gets endorsed by Neil Patel would have a strong media presence, yeah?
Try again. No Facebook page that I could find.
Well since we met on LinkedIn, surely his game is strong. 13 followers for his business page... OK, I guess we all have to start somewhere.
YouTube, maybe? 3 subs with just as many videos. Hmmmm...
Surely he's a Warlord of Twitter...? Nah, only 40 followers and NO tweets.
But he's a CEO of a business that manages $1,000,000 a month in ad spend... surely that must mean he has a team of employees, right? Only 2 employees on LinkedIn, and 1 of them is credited as being the bartender, the other is a "brand ambassador" who works for a dozen other ... brands.
Definitely a professional.
Folks, writing cold email when you're trying to build a service business isn't a sin.
Lying your a$$ off in a desperate attempt to get attention is most definitely a sin.
Make sure your cold emails are short, YOU focused, and truthful. And don't call yourself a CEO if you manage a bartender.
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