Have Smartphones Destroyed Humanity?

[Olimac21]

T

I have found the Screen Time app that is now part of iOS to be extremely helpful. I have us set up as a family and can limit my kids to minutes a day. I have found a few unintended consequences. 1. Since the devices are completely unable to be used from 10pm-7am, the kids rush around to get stuff done while they're in their window (since all chores and homework have to be done before I relinquish control). 2. I have my social media time set to 15 minutes a day and it usually gets eaten up by iMessage (even though I allow iMessage through the block). 3. My overall desire to get onto my phone and my kids' desire to get onto their phone has lessened immensely. 4. You can still get to what you need to, but it will remind you again after 15 minutes and force you to make another choice.

This feels like a good first attempt by a manufacturer towards responsible consumption.

Try the "Moment" app it has really helped me to use cell phone less.

 

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[amp0193]

This was my thought as well. But even then, I would limit its access, just like the car.

Some would be appropriate, sure. Especially at first. You ease into it. But at the same time, teens need to learn to be independent and control their own impulses and choices, and deal with consequences.

As access is extended, you would need to regularly talk/coach your kids about good habits, consequences, anxiety related to social media use, etc. I'm going to be doing this for the next 10 years as my kids grow up... I'll let you know if it helped.

My parents never talked to me about any of that, so I spent hours a day on AIM and video games and maybe slept 5 hours a night.

The real mistake, was them not allowing me to fail, and bailing me out of things. I might have learned some control, if my poor decisions led to actual consequences.

 

[amp0193]

When they can pay for it themselves both the cost of a phone and service plan...

I think this is my favorite answer. I'm doing it.

 

[ChrisV]

If any of you guys are interested in this research, this is the work of Jean Twenge, who’s a social science researcher / professor from San Diego State University.



iGen: Why Today's Super-Connected Kids Are Growing Up Less Rebellious, More Tolerant, Less Happy--and Completely Unprepared for Adulthood--and What That Means for the Rest of Us

Her TEDx talk on the topic:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UA8kZZS_bzc


An Excerpt from Jonathan Haidt / Greg Lukianoff’s Book “The Coddling of the American Mind.” which also touches on this subject:

“Twenge does this by examining all the daily activities reported by individual students, in the two datasets that include such measures. Twenge finds that there are just two activities that are significantly correlated with depression and other suicide-related outcomes (such as considering suicide, making a plan, or making an actual attempt): electronic device use (such as a smartphone, tablet, or computer) and watching TV. On the other hand, there are five activities that have inverse relationships with depression (meaning that kids who spend more hours per week on these activities show lower rates of depression): sports and other forms of exercise, attending religious services, reading books and other print media, in-person social interactions, and doing homework.
Notice anything about the difference between the two lists? Screen versus nonscreen. When kids use screens for two hours of their leisure time per day or less, there is no elevated risk of depression.21 But above two hours per day, the risks grow larger with each additional hour of screen time. Conversely, kids who spend more time off screens, especially if they are engaged in nonscreen social activities, are at lower risk for depression and suicidal thinking. 22”​

 

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[ChrisV]

New Studies Link Cell Phone Radiation with Cancer

New study showing cancerous effects of cellphones on a particular type of cell which wraps around nerves (Schwann cell). Tested on 3000 rats.

It's not an "alarming" rate, but statistically significant. With the lesson being, if you use your phone, get a wired headset.

Also, new WiFi routers come with 5G enabled by default.

Anything on WiFi signals?

 

[andyhaus44]

T

Try the "Moment" app it has really helped me to use cell phone less.

Moment has been a huge help for me, thanks for sharing. Stayfocusd on Google Chrome is also great -- just block the sites you normally go to, and then set a timer on how long you want to give yourself for those sites. For example, I am currently giving myself 90 minutes to check this forum, update my finances, log my habits/goals, etc. and when the 90 minutes is up, I'm done for the day. Stayfocusd is a lot like Moment (but for your computer) and you can even set a time for "active time" during the day like you can on Moment

 

[andyhaus44]

This post really ought to be gold, if not at least notable. Such a great post by MJ. Thank you so much MJ for getting this all started. This amazing post changed my life in four different ways:

1) Turned my phone to gray scale to combat addiction (Thanks to whoever recommended it)

2) Turned off all of my notifications (Thanks MJ)

3) Reduced my everyday phone screen time from 2.5 hours to 1 hour

4) Am going to start using my iPod again because it keeps me off my phone

 

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[andyhaus44]

Greyscale! Done. I love it. Rep+

Hey Andy,

Not sure if you or anyone else has ever tried it, but this is about as close as it gets to greyscaleing your computer --
f.lux

f.lux makes the color of your computer's display adapt to the time of day, warm at night and like sunlight during the day.

It's even possible that you're staying up too late because of your computer. You could use f.lux because it makes you sleep better

 

[Primeperiwinkle]

Ok I did it. I’m trying this for at least 24 hours. I feel oddly peaceful..

This. Is. So. Weird.

I just got sleepy and I’m aware of my surroundings... huh.

 

[Rob Tennant]

This was my thought as well. But even then, I would limit its access, just like the car.

We wouldn't allow our kids to have unlimited access to sugar (cookies, cakes, candy) which has addictive properties (they would eat that stuff non-stop) but we have no problem giving them unlimited access to something else equally addictive ... and yes, they're gobbling it up with no hesitation.

Fighting this battle with my 10 year old daughter now..Even mom doesn't fully understand my position. All my daughter's friends have smartphones and instagram etc etc. I'm known as the strict dad in her circle of friends, simply because I dont allow her to do whatever she wants and buy her a smartphone. I mean how in the world will she survive and talk w friends if she doesn't have a smartphone right?!

Personally, I really despise FB, snap, insta, kik, etc. IMO, this "tech" is nothing more than drugs being peddled by the likes of Zuckerberg, et al. (who I doubt even uses FB). This personal/family destroying "tech" makes it easier to commit adultery, waste massive amounts of time, brain atrophy, cause depression due to envy/jealousy, is ironically anti-social, on and on. I'm sure they're are some positive use cases (FLF, if you consider forums social media), but probably very few and far between.

Smartphone is a powerful tool no doubt, when used responsibly. I don't watch news, or allow people access to myself 24/7. A portion of ea day I like to sit by myself and think. If I'm ever caught doing this (my wife and family understand) by anyone else, I'm accused of being depressed, weird, anti-social, etc. I mean, why would someone just sit by themselves, in peace and quiet, no phone or tv in the background, and think? Inconceivable..

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

Fighting this battle with my 10 year old daughter now..Even mom doesn't fully understand my position. All my daughter's friends have smartphones and instagram etc etc. I'm known as the strict dad in her circle of friends, simply because I dont allow her to do whatever she wants and buy her a smartphone. I mean how in the world will she survive and talk w friends if she doesn't have a smartphone right?!

Personally, I really despise FB, snap, insta, kik, etc. IMO, this "tech" is nothing more than drugs being peddled by the likes of Zuckerberg, et al. (who I doubt even uses FB). This personal/family destroying "tech" makes it easier to commit adultery, waste massive amounts of time, brain atrophy, cause depression due to envy/jealousy, is ironically anti-social, on and on. I'm sure they're are some positive use cases (FLF, if you consider forums social media), but probably very few and far between.

Smartphone is a powerful tool no doubt, when used responsibly. I don't watch news, or allow people access to myself 24/7. A portion of ea day I like to sit by myself and think. If I'm ever caught doing this (my wife and family understand) by anyone else, I'm accused of being depressed, weird, anti-social, etc. I mean, why would someone just sit by themselves, in peace and quiet, no phone or tv in the background, and think? Inconceivable..

The future will be owned by those who can control these dopamine addictions and their effects.

If you meditate, I would give you an immediate advantage as it shows a level of self-awareness into how these devices can impact us. As mentioned before, the concern is not with the adults, but with the children who don't have the self-awareness and mental discipline to see what is happening.

The other day I was in Target and I noticed this young girl (guessing 16, 17) who almost ran into a merchandising stand while buried in her smartphone. I saw her later at the checkout line. In the whole time I observed her, she NEVER allowed her eyes to leave her smartphone longer than 10 seconds (to pay the cashier). As she walked out (in front of me) into the parking lot ... same thing ... eyes buried in the smartphone.

I'm truly horrified for the future.

 

[amp0193]

My kids aren't old enough to where wanting a smart phone is an issue.

But wanting sweets/candy/dessert is. That sugar rush is just as addicting.

When there's something in the pantry (cookies I baked yesterday) my 2 year old is throwing a crying fit to get another one, and my 4 year old is pulling every negotiating tactic in the book to weasel one out of me.

When there's nothing in the pantry... there's no problem. It's not even a discussion... there's literally nothing there to talk about. We don't have any, end of story, go eat some blueberries. The kids are fine.


Parents are always talking about "how do you limit screen time". It's pretty easy when you don't have a tv or tablet in your house and your kid doesn't have a phone. They play with barbies and legos instead. Or *shock* go outside.

I realize it becomes harder with peer pressure in middle school... I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

 

[illmasterj]

97% of the time I want nothing to do with smartphones and social media. But when I'm travelling my phone is damn handy and when meeting people at a conference or wanting to get some eyes on a new website/project, social media is really handy.

I'm tempted to delete all social media and see what it's like to launch a project WITHOUT it. Sometimes I think we don't realise how easy the internet has made it to start businesses, yet so many people still have trouble starting.

 

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[Zcott]

It has the great potential to ruin a generation. There's dopamine every other second. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc., scroll down your phone and you get is

Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine


We don't even know the long term effects of this on public health. Smart phones have been out for 10 years, we don't know what it'll be like in 40 to 50 years time. However, I think society is becoming more aware of the health risks and no longer just stereotypical adults bemoaning a younger generation and 'kids stuck to their phones.' I imagine in the next 5 years we will see an increase in health risks to phone use.

But it's a difficult warning to convey. Compare it to smoking and drinking. They are obvious; it is a single action which has a consequence. You wouldn't think that with mobile phones because you are not putting a physical substance into your body. 'Facebook is bad? Lol no, I'm just seeing what my friends are upto,' 'I'm just checking Maps to know where I'm going,' 'Hey I got a snapchat.' That's reasonable but your brain also just sees dopamine dopamine dopamine. It is subliminal.

I have problems with it too, but I am aware and work on it. Sometimes it frustrates me. I can browse Facebook for a few seconds on my computer, leave the room to go boil the kettle or something and I'll find myself on Facebook, and I'm there like 'WHY ARE YOU ON HERE?! YOU WERE HERE LITERALLY 10 SECONDS AGO AND FOR NO REASON' to myself.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Was gonna post this in the RANDOM THOUGHTS page but figured this might be a better place for it...

Via that thread...

Also - Simon Sinek says I'm managing my millennials wrong. He's probably right.

I spent an hour on the stairmaster yesterday and the machines are elevated at the back of the gym giving me a clear view of the gym.

As the workout winded down I got bored and just start doing some people watching. I noticed three girls, I'm guessing 20 or so, went from machine to machine. 5 minutes on treadmill, 5 minutes on elliptical, 5 minutes next to me on stairmaster, 5 minutes at the water fountain to chit-chat. If I didn't know any better, I would have thought I was at Chucky Cheese the way they hopped from machine to machine. Granted, none of them exercised with any intensity, broke any kind of sweat and it was like they were just on the machines to be on there.

It was like they used the gym as a buffet to be sampled.

I came to the conclusion that they were utilizing the machines exactly how they're used to consuming life... swipe, swipe, swipe; click, click, click; channel flip, channel flip, channel flip. So here it's machine, machine, machine.

Nothing gets any real attention or focus because there's always the fear that you're missing out on something better.

 

[Zcott]

I spent an hour on the stairmaster yesterday and the machines are elevated at the back of the gym giving me a clear view of the gym.

As the workout winded down I got bored and just start doing some people watching. I noticed three girls, I'm guessing 20 or so, went from machine to machine. 5 minutes on treadmill, 5 minutes on elliptical, 5 minutes next to me on stairmaster, 5 minutes at the water fountain to chit-chat. If I didn't know any better, I would have thought I was at Chucky Cheese the way they hopped from machine to machine. Granted, none of them exercised with any intensity, broke any kind of sweat and it was like they were just on the machines to be on there.

It was like they used the gym as a buffet to be sampled.

I came to the conclusion that they were utilizing the machines exactly how they're used to consuming life... swipe, swipe, swipe; click, click, click; channel flip, channel flip, channel flip. So here it's machine, machine, machine.

Nothing gets any real attention or focus because there's always the fear that you're missing out on something better.

And to make it worse, you know there's a strong chance that they were snapchatting or instagraming it too. If I see someone do this at the gym and I'm on a machine behind them I try to get in their selfie with a stupid face.

On a side note, related to this topic, I've noticed that there's been a growth of what I call an internet personality. It's people who can't be themselves and adopt what they see online as if they think that is their own, original personality. You know the type, 'pizza is life,' 'tacos are life,' 'netflix is life,' 'omg pugs are life.' They think they're being cool and unique but they're such a buzz kill.

 

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[Olimac21]

And to make it worse, you know there's a strong chance that they were snapchatting or instagraming it too. If I see someone do this at the gym and I'm on a machine behind them I try to get in their selfie with a stupid face.

On a side note, related to this topic, I've noticed that there's been a growth of what I call an internet personality. It's people who can't be themselves and adopt what they see online as if they think that is their own, original personality. You know the type, 'pizza is life,' 'tacos are life,' 'netflix is life,' 'omg pugs are life.' They think they're being cool and unique but they're such a buzz kill.

People these days are more worried about building an online persona than becoming great in real life...

 

[handog]

It hit me years ago when I was out camping. I love to camp. I remember days when everyone sat around the camp fire told stories and laughed. It's much less social these days. People still socialize but now when I sit around a camp fire and it's silent I look around and see everyone glued to their phones. Times have changed.

 

[kanunay]

Nothing gets any real attention or focus because there's always the fear that you're missing out on something better.

Sums up how dating and relationships work with the smartphone generation...

 

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[B. Cole]

Going to interject a little truth in this though -

No doubt, social media is humanity‘s biggest drug. Legally accessible and publicly promoted to people of every age, extremely cheap to exploit and probably not ever going away.

It corrals people into dense, easy to reach groups. People on social media obligate themselves to consume and display their consumption for social status, not because they used their head to determine they needed it.

Insert capitalism > profit.

Can you imagine 1/2, heck, 3/4 of the businesses on here surviving without it?

It gives more sidewalk space to the side walkers, more distraction and mass market brain rinsing to the slowlaners, and more opportunity to the capitalists.

It’s a little sad to watch people act more like sheep than ever, just try to keep your kids from joining the flock.

 

[amp0193]

Sums up how dating and relationships work with the smartphone generation...

It's not just dating. It's everything.

Where you choose to live. Where you go on vacation. What you do for a job. Your hobbies. Your consumption. How you spend your time.

It is flat out difficult to find contentment when constantly bombarded with imagery of everything else that's out there.

FOMO is a tough thing to ignore.

 

[Get Right]

Agreed.

I have an interesting problem with smartphones. I like reading books on mine. I read all the time...so I'm sure it looks like I have a problem. I worry that my kids won't/can't make the distinction.

 

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[amp0193]

Agreed.

I have an interesting problem with smartphones. I like reading books on mine. I read all the time...so I'm sure it looks like I have a problem. I worry that my kids won't/can't make the distinction.

Dunno how old your kids are, but if they're young, this might be something to be concerned about.

I will almost never use my phone in front of my kids. If I have to send a text, I'll go to the bathroom and knock out two birds with one stone.

I can't split my attention. Every time a kid tries to get my attention, and can't, because I'm finishing up a text or something... I dunno, I don't think it's a good thing. Those little instances add up.

I want to limit their desire to have and use a device. Having a physical book in my hand clearly shows them "I LIKE TO READ".

Or if you want to keep it to e-books, maybe if you just had an e-reader device, that you only used for reading, and so they get that "daddy's reading". And not jacking around on the internet.

 

[rogue synthetic]

I pretty much live in a pile of books, so my preschool-age little girls see that Daddy likes to read. I also do a lot of reading on a tablet and an e-reader (I really like to read), so I've worried about that too. I just let them know that I'm reading and not mindlessly grazing on dopamine chow.

They seem to get it. They're happy with their own books and haven't showed any real interest in developing an addiction to neon overload.

 

[SquatchMan]

I keep my phone on silent and turned off the blinking LED notification light.

Really cuts down on the dopamine addiction. Not practical for some people due to work/family issues, but it works for me.

 

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[rpeck90]

I pretty much live in a pile of books, so my preschool-age little girls see that Daddy likes to read. I also do a lot of reading on a tablet and an e-reader (I really like to read), so I've worried about that too. I just let them know that I'm reading and not mindlessly grazing on dopamine chow.

They seem to get it. They're happy with their own books and haven't showed any real interest in developing an addiction to neon overload.

And so they'll grow up valuing the wealth trapped in the pages of books!! If you can instill that habit young, they'll thank you profusely later on.

I think the term "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree" is so apt with this sort of thing. Kids using smartphones to fill in their lives are typically following suit from the parents (who used TV or some other thing to fill theirs).

The millennial generation was brought up by one who weren't really aware of the dangers of modern society. In turn, that generation was brought up by a generation blighted by the depression.

You tend to find the zeitgeist for the generations as follows:

• Grandma/Grandpa -- depression meant they constantly searched for value in everything; self sufficient
• Parents -- consumption boom of 50's,60's,70's,80's -- kicked back against their parents' fear of loss by indulging in "free love" and building their own lives
• Present -- brought up on credit and many spoiled by their own parents (who compensated by the lack in their youth by buying a ton of stuff). Kids become accustomed to getting whatever they wanted, always looking for the next thing. Get shocked that "real life" doesn't give them free handouts and makes them pay through the nose for houses etc. Escape by using smartphones.

I was born in 1990, and my parents gave me every material benefit I could possibly have wanted. Nothing stupid (like going on expensive holidays), but boxes of presents for Christmas and I never skipped a meal.

Whilst it may sound halcyonic, the truth is they under-prepared me for the modern world. I am fortunate because my mother was especially good with money... but I see many of my peers ending up in dead-end jobs, disinterested in learning, and essentially being the tax-and-debt-slave the system wants.

If you aren't growing internally (which is hard), you put all your emphasis on the external. Putting emphasis externally is basically what's lead to the smartphone stuff. The fact it's smartphones is symptomatic. The same behaviour exists with fast food, video games, recreational drugs, porn, TV shows and even the likes of dating/pickup. What's more, everyone has it to some degree.

The beauty of the Internet is that it's opened the door for communities like this, which are exposing the pitfalls of the modern world. Whilst it's true that smartphones have enabled the vices of a generation, unless you rigorously control things (as you would have in a dictatorship), you just have to put up with it (or capitalize on it). The answer - as with almost every issue - is to go inward. Indulge in your own life and forget everyone else. Over time, you'll attract those who see the world as you do.

 

[kkoasdfawfqwe2]

Nothing gets any real attention or focus because there's always the fear that you're missing out on something better.

As a 22 year old myself I can tell you, despite being aware of exactly how all of this affects people and myself, I still get this FOMO to times.

I have been doing pretty well for myself in 2018 and YET I find myself certain days a month where I feel like shit and feel like I'm missing out on something that could be even better or be even more!

First I concluded that it was simply because I'm too ambitious, but I can feel deep in myself that this is not the truth, and it was more likely a cover lie to myself in order to feel better or avoid that bad feeling.

The truth is that I also get affected when the world around me looks more succesful and better than what my life is.

It scares me that I get so affected despite knowing that most of these SOME flexers are sidewalkers or straight up pretenders.

I imagine what people in a worse situation than me can feel, laying on their couch browsing Instagram filled with people wearing Rolex, driving Porsches and flexing in front of huge estates, after a whole week of working a shitty job and yet broke and with no plan for their future in sight.

I am not putting kids into this world before I get a clue on how to deal with this myself first, thats for sure.

 

[Olimac21]

As a 22 year old myself I can tell you, despite being aware of exactly how all of this affects people and myself, I still get this FOMO to times.

I have been doing pretty well for myself in 2018 and YET I find myself certain days a month where I feel like sh*t and feel like I'm missing out on something that could be even better or be even more!

First I concluded that it was simply because I'm too ambitious, but I can feel deep in myself that this is not the truth, and it was more likely a cover lie to myself in order to feel better or avoid that bad feeling.

The truth is that I also get affected when the world around me looks more succesful and better than what my life is.

It scares me that I get so affected despite knowing that most of these SOME flexers are sidewalkers or straight up pretenders.

I imagine what people in a worse situation than me can feel, laying on their couch browsing Instagram filled with people wearing Rolex, driving Porsches and flexing in front of huge estates, after a whole week of working a sh*tty job and yet broke and with no plan for their future in sight.

I am not putting kids into this world before I get a clue on how to deal with this myself first, thats for sure.

The way to deal with FOMO is to realize you are not really missing much. What people post on Social Media is fake, it is like augmented reality and even if you feel you are missing something at the moment you might get it later on, there is an abundance of opportunities out there and feel FOMO beliefs rely on scarcity sometimes, believing you are missing the only chance of experiencing whatever others are up to.

Another trick that can help you is to compare yourself with those you have less or practice negative visualization about some of the things/people you take for granted nowadays.

 

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[c.dream87]

I agree, the smartphone has created a generation of isolated people (I also speak for myself, unfortunately)

 

[amp0193]

I keep my phone on silent and turned off the blinking LED notification light.

Really cuts down on the dopamine addiction. Not practical for some people due to work/family issues, but it works for me.

A good tip @LightHouse gave me was putting the phone on do not disturb, but then setting a handful of people to come through all the time.

That was a good solution for me. I can get my wife's calls, and my 800 number calls, but block everything else.