Spot BS: Post your favorite MLM pitch...

[Rawr]

Easy as 1..2..3!



123 of what? Steps, Situps, Sail boat trips around the world?

 

[Lauryn]

OMG. I have so many MLM experiences - I'm at my day gig. We're getting off early. I sure will be back...

 

[Lauryn]

I'm not against MLM but I've just done enough of them to know it's not for me.
The best MLM works because the PRODUCTS work and there's a limited number of reps in the territory.

If you can get in on something early on, you'll reap the benefits because you're an early adopter, parle that time and experience into the business and keep it moving. But more often than not, when you're signing up for one of these companies, you're down to your last few hundred bucks and are sold on the opportunities it presents.

I have done:

- Avon
- Mary Kay
- Petra
- Undercover Wear
- Fine Choice Food Club
- Primerica (bah!)

and considered

- Passion Parties
- Bedroom Kandi
- ItWorks (body wraps)
- Pampered Chef

More often than not, the person putting me on to the opportunity is almost always struggling - at their day job and at this second gig. And they're more interested in pursuing recruits than selling the product. I'm not for that. When I know of and like something, I LOVE to sell - because I do it easily and naturally. In my blogs, in my communications and in my conversations with friends!

 

[Whiphsh]

I actually wanted to kill some time with the dude just for fun, so I acted as if I was interested.

Him: Okay now here's a spreadsheet now let's take your phone and write all your contacts down in here.

Me: -

Him: Also, if there's anyone else you know who is not in your phone book, include them when you get back home.

Me: Yeah I actually left my phone at home so I'll fill them when I can...(I actually answered his call on the way to the cafe we met in *facepalm* )

Him: Yeah that's fine. Anyway, we could meet again tomorrow and call them together. What do you think?

I actually wonder how it worked out for him. Amway was a new thing here at that time so he must have gotten at least a coupl of people into it.

 

[liquidglass]

Not really a failure sales pitch but I witnessed the darkside of MLM.

My old Criminal Justice teacher from high school got pitched and hooked by one of his former students to attend a Primerica meeting. He attended, signed up, made a decent amount of money his first couple of months then QUIT his day job. Yes he quit his teacher job to work full time for Primerica. Long story short, the Primerica sales stopped coming in and his wife and kids ended up leaving him.

It's really sad how these companies brainwash these people to believe in a side walk "business opportunity."

Isn't Primerica an insurance company and not an MLM?

 

[Kshatriya]

"Unlike all other companies, this has a unique opportunity."
Since it's a small town, I've heard 3-4 people using the same dialog with some other people. My driving master made over USD 3500 within first month and a bit more in the second month, and I didn't see him recently. Nobody else made it so well here anyway.

Another common pitch "You'll get products for the joining fee you pay."

 

[pickeringmt]

I just love when they stop you and ask, "what would YOU do with an extra $500 a month?"

And then actually sit there until I tell them.

OH, and the classic, "Well, you know 5 people, right?"

Like there is any person on earth that is going to say, "Nope, just you, my mom, and the guy you just bought my coffee from...."

I never actually joined any MLM stuff, but I am a HUGE fan

 

[smarty]

Me: So what do you do?
Her: Oh, I'm a leader in our <insert bullshit MLM team here> and I help people to make money online.
Me: I like that, how exactly does it work? (being naive lol)
Her: It;s very easy and our team is very helpful. We have weekly <bullshit> webinars. If you join our team of leaders <implying you will become a leader> you get access to all our training videos and you get your own <iframed domain>website. It is only $25.
Me: So how do I make money if I join?
Her: You get access to your own blog where you can write about anything you are passionate about. Then people will find your site from google and they will join and...
Me:

haha

 

[RogueInnovation]

His friend: Hey bro, come with me this Wed night, its a lady's night.
My friend: Where we goin'?
His friend: I know a place, we can check out some babes.
My friend: Ok see you then!
Wednesday night.
His friend: We're here, let me introduce you to a friend of mine (upline)
His friend's Upline: Let me tell you about a business opportunity.
My friend: *In his mind* - "Kidnapped!"

Great

 

[Bowden]

Luckily for me I've only encountered these people a few times in my life.

A friend of my wife's keeps pushing that bracelet company.

Wife felt bad and ended up spending $100 or so on some cheap bracelets lol

 

[CaliforniaDan]

Was in a book store, and someone was trying to sell me on an MLM. I said no thanks, and was walking away, and she said, "Well, it isn't for everyone. <hopeful look>" I almost took the bait, then realized, it was bait.

 

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[smarty]

My favorite pitch ending:

"I’ll see you on the inside…"

every time they say that, I'm either on the ground laughing so hard, or on my bed crying loudly

 

[MitchC]

Posted to my Facebook Inbox...

1. I don't post on FB everyday. In fact, the last status update I made was probably mid to late last year. Strike #1
2. Rodan + Fields is a skin care line. Hmmm, sounds perfect for a middle-age man! Strike #2
3. My positive and magnetic personality? Based on my ZERO posts I've made in the last year? Based on having spoken/conversed with you exactly ZERO times? Strike #3.
4. I wrote a lengthy diatribe in my book crucifying MLM (Re: Direct Sales business) -- again, why the f*ck would I want to join you? And do you truly know anything about me other than being a warm body to fill your lead funnel? Strike #4: Not get back to the bench and try again.

These people are pathetic. And no, I have no clue who this person was who messaged me.

The first and only time I heard about this skin care line was this:

A famous actor posted about his skin cancer operation and said always wear sunscreen. The post come up on the "trending" link in Facebook and I clicked it to see the relevant posts.

People had taken his photo of his operation, and added a photo of their r+f sunscreen crap, then written a post starting about his operation and how he told everyone always wear sunscreen, then proceeded to talk about how they sold sunscreen and it's the best message me for 70% off.

Soo many of these sheep had done this copying each other.

I didn't see a single positive comment on their posts and plenty of hate. I honestly think joining an MLM could ruin your life, or atleast your social life, life as you know it.

 

[halmerej]

"Nice shoes"
"I own an online company"
"I'm going to a business meeting"

 

[TreyAllDay]

"Invest in yourself". I could not BELIEVE at the one a friend asked me to go to (which later was shut down by FCC I believe) how brainwashed these people were - it was like being in a cult. My buddy honestly believed if he let me walk out of there without signing up he was a bad friend.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

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[Sanj Modha]

Whether or not it was real or fiction, and the controversy surrounding it, it communicated fastlane ideas in an accessible way to the mainstream.

I likely wouldn't be where I am if that book hadn't got me thinking differently years ago.

I don't have a problem with fiction. But don't pass it off as fact which is what Kiyosaki did and was busted for it. There's enough BS in this industry. TBH, I've read 10 x more powerful stuff since reading a few chapters off RD/PD.

I loved The Alchemist. That's fiction and pretty powerful too.

 

[BillyMaysHere27]

Hate to admit this, but I fell for one of these in college... Only because I had 3 good friends making enough money to pay their bills and drive cars paid for my the company (which they still have and own). It's definitely a short term scheme to make the top dawgs rich. However, I do have a buddy that is an absolute savage in sales and got in with a mlm company in the early stages and is now pulling in 24k a MONTH... at 25 years old... Now he travels the world and takes his payout (that he doesn't have to do anything for anymore) and uses it to fund his fastlane business. He also has 23k followers on instagram and pulls in money from there too.. So for some people it definitely works if it's not their end goal to sell energy drinks to their friends and they take that money and put it towards building their own business. I'm not at all promoting mlm or saying that people should do it or not, I'm simply just telling you that there are a FEW people that really do make good money doing this kind of stuff. I just happen to know a handful personally. Not my cup of tea though.

 

[LifeTransformer]

I've been posting a lot in the Ethereum thread... If you want to see some MLM insanity going on? Cryptocurrency is where it's at.

10 level deep referral programs on some of them, isn't that sweet?

I just need to get Trump to sign up under me!

It's like Ponzi on a pyramid with a cherry on top.

 

[PaulRobert]

Curious, you still talk to this person?

Don't even remember their first name or even if I have their number anymore.

 

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[workinprogress]

Anotherperson I recently came across in Asia was a guy trying to tell me that he has a cream that cures cancer and autism.
He said it was banned by the FDA and they're no longer able to produce it because they were "shaking up the pharma industry".

He legitimately tried to tell me that people were calling him crying because they need more of this cream for their children.

Now he only keeps a private stash in case he gets cancer in the future. As my British friends would say "What a load of bullocks."

That sounds wild. Doesn't sound like an MLM persay though, unless he's trying to sell it through that pyramid business model.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

 

[Ubermensch]

@axiom

Reviewing our discussions from last year, it seems you had some great ideas in this regard. LOL

 

[Sequential]

There's a local entrepreneur nerworking meetup near me.

Been a couple of times. But it's been completely overrun by MLM peddlers, which has sucked the life out of it. Instead of meeting people, you just get pitched the dream and then they get bewildered when I tell them to cram it.

Funniest part is, a lot of them are pitching the same thing so they get shitty when someone else in the room is also selling the same type of snake oil.

The big new one is a miracle wearable patch you wear all day that "releases vitamins and minerals only when your body needs them".

Being into fitness, naturally I probed...

SYK: "What's in it?"
MLM'er: "Hundreds of vitamins and minerals"
SYK: "Yeah, but what exactly?"
MLM'er: "Just all kinds of vitamins and minerals"
SYK: "OK.... how does it work? I mean, how does your body only know to draw from it when it needs?"
MLM'er: "Ummmmm... I'm not really sure. But, but since I've started wearing it I get up at 5am, I used to drink 3 cups of coffee now I need none, I never get tired, I've seen it change people's lives..."

Best thing was... when we started talking she'd just told me how tired and exhausted she was. Might need another magic sticker, darling.

All the local ones are overrun by that too. They think networking means selling, turning all the meets into tripe!

 

[Court]

Most MLM people aren't ripping people off. They genuinely want to help others with their delusions of passive income fortunes. False premises yields false actions, not necessarily deception or ripping people off. And therein lies the problem: These folks actually think they're evangelizing for something new or novel.

Agree with your thought on this... we used to own an MLM company and they see the few amazing, hard working, sales kings/queens and then assume that they can do the same with no work. MLM is a powerful and amazing way to distribute a product, but it does rely on people believing in the opportunity of wealth and freedom via becoming a representative of the company. The few who have done if for years and built followings, or are simply great sales people, do find success. Most just flounder and fail to work at the business or try without good guidance or realistic expectations.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Any new pitches to report? I'm guessing with CV19 that the recruitment has intensified!

 

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[Deleted50669]

I posted this in the failure forum because every once in awhile we get some guy here trying to pitch us Fastlaners a great revolutionary MLM that is making people tons of money! Some will even show-off their awesome $10K checks and their impressive Mercedes C-Class.

I've learned to spot the funny pitches and this thread will help you SPOT the pitches before you get roped into some low EV pipe dream.

Please post your favorite pitches, phrases, or word combos...

Here are mine:

1) I need 30 people who want to join my "team" -- must be self-starter and motivated!" ("Really? 30? So after 30 you will STOP pitching your shit? Why not 40? Or 100?")

2) It's going to happen with or without you! ("Great, make it happen with out me!")

3) Ground-floor opportunity

4) Be your own boss! ("All while being extremely annoying and losing your friends and family in the process!")

5) Residual income! ("LOL, if everyone is making "residual income" who actually is selling product?!")

Aren't you basically advocating for #4?

 

[Summersalt]

They tell you the products are working. But more interested in selling you the products and not to use them for themselves.

 

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[Zcott]

Any new pitches to report? I'm guessing with CV19 that the recruitment has intensified!

Two people I know have gone into it over the course of lockdown and post about it in a non-pushy way on social media. They appear to utilise the feature where you can ask someone a question through a stories post. They respond to the questions, whether the questions are their own or real I don't know, and they end it by casually asking if people to dm them if they want to know anything else. It's a bit clever, and to their credit they seem to be doing relatively well.

 

[LifeisSuffering]

it's the business of the 21 century ( like the AI and Blockchain are shitty industries)

 

[P789]

Another one on facebook, YOU CAN GET A SCHOLARSHIP PROGRAM if you buy 8 sets of this product for the price of $100 (₱5,100) and the product itself is garbage. Its because testimonials surfaced on this social media, claiming that their skin became rash as they applied the product.

And their target market was students who were desperate for money as the pandemic ravages our country.

And what is so funny here is that this MLM was featured on the national TV as complaints mount

 

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