Sometimes it's worth just keeping quiet

[TheNextTrump]

I use to talk, then I woke up and asked my self, why?

Why should I expect them to accept my dreams, why should they give me positive encouragement. Why do I get pissed when they don't say that's an awesome idea/business. Why do I get angry when they say I'm a arrogant dreamer?

Why, why, and why.

Oh yeah, because my goal is to become part of the 1%. I got 99 problems but a NAYSAYER/HATER aint one of em.

 

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[Shdreams]

I get where you're coming from and agree that resilience is in fact essential to this, but negativity isn't really useful to me unless it's a complaint I can remedy.

Trying to Convince the Haters that, Especially family. To me seems pointless. When the doubters start talking YOU need to recognize there Lack of vision. And respond appropriately. My style of dealing with things may not mesh well for you though.

 

[Shdreams]

When people are waiting for me to fail Is when I do my best work. That took years of practice. Now only if I could translate that into I %500 pay raise lol

 

[FlamingRemedy]

Trying to Convince the Haters that, Especially family. To me seems pointless. When the doubters start talking YOU need to recognize there Lack of vision. And respond appropriately. My style of dealing with things may not mesh well for you though.

Hehehe looks like we misunderstood each other, that's actually how I think.

 

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[Shdreams]

 

[Shdreams]

Have you tried to get your wife to read the Millionaire Fastlane ? Especially the first half in her case--exposing her to the mindset.

I Haven't thought of that. I just have to convince her it gets real romantic after the 3rd chapter.

 

[axiom]

I Haven't thought of that. I just have to convince her it gets real romantic after the 3rd chapter.

'50 Shades of Fastlane'

 

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[ChickenHawk]

"we'll never have that type of house so stop showing me them" (the Wife).

This strikes me as most concerning. How on earth can you be married to someone who doesn't support your dreams and goals?

And Now for a Frothy Rant in Defense of the Wife...
I'm going to come in on the opposite side here. My best friend shacked up with a big-talking sidewalker who took her on COUNTLESS tours of homes beyond his price-range. He did for this years. He couldn't afford those homes then, and he STILL can't afford those homes. And here's why. When not sitting on his fat, hairy a$$, he spent most of his time in mental masterbation over all all the things he was planning to buy when he finally "hits it big." According to this loser's ex-wife, the guy's been doing this for twenty-plus years.

Let's face it. Most people who talk the big game do very little to make it reality. I only WISH my friend had told this douchebag what he could do with his shopping trips. Instead, she has spent literally thousands of dollars (I'm talking five figures here) and countless hours supporting this idiot's "business plans" and shopping trips. (Yes, he does run a business, from HER home, btw. But he's a lazy, stupid, pompous a$$ who'd rather watch porn that actually work.)

If the guy had spent HALF of that energy actually working rather than dreaming or shopping, he might be able to afford his dream-house.

Please don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying the original poster is anything like my friend's douchebag idiot. I'm just saying that actions, not talking or shopping, are the real things that deserve support. If the wife is skeptical, she may have her reasons. Maybe those reasons have nothing to do with how much she loves or supports her husband. Maybe she just realizes that he odds of anyone achieving this kind of success are statistically slim. Maybe she's working a mind-numbing slow-lane job to support his dreams, and she's getting tired and discouraged. Maybe, since the business hasn't yet hit it big, she's the one paying the bills and holding down the fort. Maybe she has a right to a little eye-rolling here and there.

I be more concerned if she was griping that he "spent too much time working." But if her biggest beef is that they're focusing too much energy on window-shopping for pricey things, I can't exactly fault her for that.

(A side note...This is not a gender-based rant. If the genders were reversed, I'd say the same thing. Remember, it's me, not my husband, who is the Fastlaner in the family. He's just not wired that way, and that's fine with me. In fact, sometimes, it's a good balance, because I tend to be a workaholic.)

 

[Paul David]

And Now for a Frothy Rant in Defense of the Wife...

Please don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying the original poster is anything like my friend's douchebag idiot. I'm just saying that actions, not talking or shopping, are the real things that deserve support. If the wife is skeptical, she may have her reasons. Maybe those reasons have nothing to do with how much she loves or supports her husband. Maybe she just realizes that he odds of anyone achieving this kind of success are statistically slim. Maybe she's working a mind-numbing slow-lane job to support his dreams, and she's getting tired and discouraged. Maybe, since the business hasn't yet hit it big, she's the one paying the bills and holding down the fort. Maybe she has a right to a little eye-rolling here and there.

No i'm nothing like that. if i was, my wife or anyone else for that matter would have every right to roll their eyes or tell me i was dreaming. I work until Midnight most nights. My Wife simply comes from the Slowlane. She's just not wired to be an entrepreneur nor has any desire to be one. In my original post i was more alluding to the fact that most people not just my Wife, jump to the same conclusion. As other posters have explained it's a natural slowlane reaction. I remember a long time ago (well 15 years ago!) when i first starting dating my Wife, I was 17 years old and had a brand new car, it was only a Ford, nothing flash or to be jealous of but it was brand new $15,000 and i'd only just left school. A young girl who lived next door to my Wife's parents at the time told my Wife's brother that her parents thought i was drug dealer because that was the only way i could afford a car like that at my age!. I don't know what annoyed me the most the fact that they thought it was the only way i could afford it or the fact they thought i was a drug dealer!.

Small slowlane mentality i'm afraid.

 

[ChickenHawk]

No i'm nothing like that. if i was, my wife or anyone else for that matter would have every right to roll their eyes or tell me i was dreaming.

Glad to hear it! And honestly, I wasn't assuming you were this way. But the sad truth is, too many big-dreamers are all talk, which can really take a toll on the people around them.

As you can probably guess, my friend's story didn't end happily, so I tend to be skeptical when people quickly assume that the spouse/partner is at fault for "not being supportive enough."

All that downer-stuff aside, I can say from experience that it's an amazing feeling to finally buy a kick-a$$ property by pulling out your checkbook.

 

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[RogueInnovation]

In my experience, I learned people usually don't want to hear anything, but what they want to hear. Which means if you're not telling them what they want to hear, they don't agree, will object, create drama for the sake of drama, and no matter what you do, you can't win unless you say something they want to hear and agree with.

So, once you learn this key point! Go out and make it happen. I don't even tell people what I'm doing, because I really don't think people care in the first place, because they're more concerned with self-absorption and "Me". Without the drama it makes it so much easier to focus on your projects and have fun with it, and not stress about it. I"m just an introvert too. lol I don't like people in my business unless I choose for them to be there. I'm not dependent on other people emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

When I"m with other people, I'll listen to them, but I don't bring up my projects unless asked. Good reason being, I'm not there yet. So, offering that information or bragging about it, without significant results,doesn't make sense to me. You can talk about it all you want, but it always takes action, and never happens over night, and some how I just learned to enjoy the journey and the ride.

Agreed

A friend of mine calls pleasing people "scrag heroine", and says its just dogfood, compared to integrity (like mattie is eloquently describing).

But like chickenhawk says, you should embody a great attitude yourself, to ensure you are on the up and up and going to succeed, in a generous and amazing way
So that when you put money down on what you need, you can smile and take a bow.