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My days with discipline in korea, And it`s process from past

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JKm

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Sep 13, 2022
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Hi, i`m currently 26, male, korean. I`ve been throught a lot of crisis, but now i finally got crucial control over my life. I`ll write those past at a chronicle view. Hope this could helps anyone who needs it.
(*my routine is at the bottom, you can skip to the bottom, If you`re in busy day.)


Age 0~10
Lower 10~20% ranked familly`s wealth, poor chlidhood, even in poor country [gdp per capatia in 1996~2006 in korea : 12000$~21000$]


15~21
It`s harsh world, I knew. but a powerful enemy inside familly was more than a harsh thing. My mother usually punished me way harder than it`s reason.

example, to prevent any misleadings.

* 'Lie her that school finished late an had a one hour of rest in park'
- 30 strikes in legs with hard woods, witch torned and bleed my leg. Those wonds remains for month.

* 'Answer in not correct way, which i didn`t answered that i like dumplings, and dare speaking my opinion. -
- Were going out for a dinner, so there was no tension at all, but suddenly i became a convict, and got same stirkes i descrived before.

* 'eyes are not polite'
- kicked out of her house, and I had to stay somewhere till she opens the door. Usually 2~4 hours.

Those type of incidents happened at least 4 times a week, so those weren`t speacial events, more like daily bases.
( I guess it`s pretty rough circumstance, and could be called abuse & violence.)

Due to domestic violence & child abuse by mother, my early life became some kind of prison life. She was the guard who I fear, and survivial becomes my usual term. So I cutted out almost every connetion with motherside since they divorsed, it was my age of 15. But, even when i`m freed, those harsh memories are still there, derives agnoy out of nowhere, anywhere, anytime. That PTSD was crucial, and I doubt no human could handle memories like that, includes myself. Under that burned down chest, I`d choose to escape and ignoring, by video games with tones of alcohol and cigarette. All day, everyday. After 10 years of prisoners life, I`d lost my hope, and my will was tear apart. That time was the darkiest in my existence.


21~23
At 21, threat and possibility of being worthless person for my whole life gets bigger enough, so it forced me to face my wounds & problems and try something to fix it, even if it`s a total mess. At that point, going to some local-lifelong educational college and studing psychology was my breackthrough. (college which takes almost everyone in, no test, no nothing, just expenses)
I made that decision by considering my wounded mind from childhood problems. That being said, was most important, urgent problem for me. At that college, I tried my best to conquer my mind with the skills and knowledges of psychology. (Those are pretty powerful, for sure. Even a burned down mind like mine could make a recovery itself within those knowledges & know-how.)

*Part time jobs for bills while studing at college. At least 20 hours of work & 24 hours of class, 30 hours of library study time / per week. I tried hard, but those remained habbits from dark past always dragged my ankle. Slump was a common issue back than. [Out of nowhere playing video game all summer vacation, something like that. 3~5 month hardwork - 2~3 month breakdown was a usual pattern.]

*College expenses were paid by fathers company`s scholarship. He didn`t make enough money in past, but he achieved high-level certificates, and got a job in big company at that time. 2010, after 25 years of suffering of being lower 5~10% poor, he finally became middle class. Even though he was on slow lane, that diffrence was huge. But, nothing more than that, because he got married again, and there was no extra space for me, they were tight on themselves already. I don`t complain, i understand that scholarship is enough good luck for me, in this harsh world.
(After one semester, i got my own scholoar by getting average A in 6 lectures, but anyway.)


23
With those hard working times, I`d partly overcomed my fear and wounds. At that fine moment, I understood that the college is no longer needed. There were no hope in staying, even after mind fixing is done. Even i graduate, goes for masters degree(which I couldn`t, because of expenses.) at the end of the road, 4~60 years of works is only thing i could anticipate, which i don`t wanted. You know, after all these suffering years & fixing mind, which felt like a desperate fight, not a life, there was a simple question in me. Why should i live as a normal citizen? For me, normal life wasn`t even close to a fair deal. It felt like cross the amazon rainforest to got a single candy. Who would take that kind of a deal? Not saying that I deserved more, i`m saying it`s just not worth living for me, die rather, i mean. So I left school that summer, with well fixed mind and heavily armed spirit.


23~24
After that enlighted day in summer, I completely quiet smoking, drinking, and gaming. But that didn`t seems enough to build some great thing. It seems like more dedicational moves were needed, according to consideration of serious purpose of my life. So, i started two things after that day.

First, I started to read books in more serious attitude. Everyday, everynight, anytime when it`s possible, I entered library. I choose to learn because I did knew that i have small knowledge, which is not even certain, or clear.
I started with schopenhauer, confucius, and many other big names in history of every intellectual area. I beileved in power of repetition, and read same great books over and over again, while explore other books. With my attitude of great student, library soon became a great teacher, and I could learned, and fix my blueprint about world.

Second, I started to train my body properly. Have a swimming class in 6am & boxing session in 4pm. one hour or more for each, and always did it with the mind of warrior, at the zone of pain and gasp. To make sure my hardwork, i talked to my boxing coach that I wanna be a WBC champ, so please give me a real training suit for that goal. They actually gave me that hard work, and i always sparred more than 3 times a week, 3rounds one time.

*I were a man standing alone in this world, so I had to pay those bills. 8am~12pm or 6pm~8pm was always filled with part time working. I worked as less as possible to concentrate my energy and time on development. Bakery, restaurant, hotels, etc. I really did squeezed the time out of it, and there were no rest or holidays for me, and I actually didn`t care about resting either.


24~25
My muscles builded stronger, and mind also getting stronger everyday. those speed were too fast that I could feel the change every week. Soon I started to understand more things, and finally overcomed my fear and anger, mostly. Learned how to use english with videos, and was preparing to go perth, austrailia, planned mma training & working in there. but with those covid(terrible misfortune maybe), my life was shaked. Eventually lost nice part time job, and that tiny, concentrated dormitory of mine was no longer a safe place to be(Lot of foriegners were there). Also crossing the border became a dumb-dangerous move. (Now we know it`s nothing more than some cold, but back than, covid treated like cancer, specially in korea. +Omicron is weaker than original in serious symptoms)
In that circumstances, my grand father contected me through my cousin, which is the only one i remained in contect on there side. they offered me to let in, and i accepted it. but, that being said, was nothing more than give-up white flag, and throwned towel middle of ring to me. Rely my destiny on my worst enemy, it only cause me a frustration. Live with the one who beated and tortured me, i soon droped everything.

(she wasn`t even trying to hurt me anymore, guess my strength was pretty scared one, even for that evil. And that was a good choice. Also, she Forgot her own guilt at all. talked like 'you have some youth problems back then'. But, testimony of victim shutted that dumb mouth easily. Old evil cried in guilt when i descrive my suffered experiences infront of her, but, those tears, didn`t give a twich on my eyes.)
*Rationalization loses against specific truth, mostly.

By that miserable situation, once again after that day in the cold stairs (after kicked out), I decided not to live more. eat, drink, gaming, for 8month. gained 20kg (44lb) during this time. it seems like my life is going towards the end fast.


25, after 8 month.
i finally made a decision, it was the ending by my hands. No seats for losers, you know. That day, i`d picked up a sharp kitchen knife, and with strong two handed grip, I aimed it for my heart. It was literally my last second before stabbing. Very soon, at those hard grip of my hands, contemplation of my past permeated in. It`s mostly about my dedications in recent years, and regrets about those not going further & harder. And that regrets holded my arms strongly. 'If I only regret my weaknesses before death, why the hell I should struggle with the trauma, which don`t even came to me in that moment?' I dropped the knife right away, and just like hoffer did under the big trees back than, I accepted the whole terms of life as it is, and understood what`s important and what doesn`t, cleary and surely. That moment, I made a crack on the great shell, bigger than anytime in my life.

* Some said, life of each and every human has its own meaning. But in some forms of life, it`s own meaning could only means agony and disorder. In those cases, you can`t hold on to your dear life without strong idea. In that life, there`s no meaning within to live another day. They have to choose. Find a bigger meaning, or die alone. Fairy tale stories are always sound sweet, but reality is always way harder than those dreams.



25~26
With that decision, i`d moved out of that house, and moved to the quiet city, that no one, no thing bothers me. After that, I started to go to library everyday, and trying to get my shape back in track, as much as possible. last years dark traces were finally removed after fall & winter. Fall`s success rate on task is nearly 50% or less, start of winter, it starting to rise up to 80%, and middle of winter, 95% line becomes solid. During the time, I`d used my small savings to pay bills, but not much cost needed for that type of life.

expenses i spent
cooking by my own makes a fine organic meal under 2$. on house, 30 grand loan deposit basis room only cost 120$ average per month, which including electronic, gas, etc. [3.5% rate per year, max 10 year unredeemed. it`s good one for young adult in korea]
So for me, 300~400$ was whole monthly cost, inculdes 80$ a month gym fee. It was pretty salty, as considering korean average cost of living is around 2000$. and in that calculation, i`m able to hold this life more than 3 years. so i dropped my concernings about future money problem, and goes deep into self- development mode. It may seems like a huge gamble. But after the build I made on that bured down field of mine, I simply knew that I could make it again, and bigger. So it was not a gamble for me, it was realistic, reasonable decision. I sacrificed my fun, cozyness, youngsters whole life things etc, but it`s toleratable as i consider.


26, winter, spring & summer
After that calculation, I learned things every single day in library and gym. Quiet alcohol forever [no beer, no wine, no nothing], quiet games eternally [not forced to, just don`t want those jokes anymore]. After throwing out all that crabs, me as a car, empty trunk and no limitation makes it`s speed faster than i ever possibly imagined.


2021.01~2021.09`s statistics.
I precisely read more than 1000 great books. (at least professor of great univ`s book were selected, no fairy tales, no bullshits included. Not gonna lie, sometimes tasted bestsellers too.) [ including TMF & unsciripted :) ] 9am-6pm precise reading is perfectly setteled and became my second nature.

I didn`t forgot workouts, and successfully get rid of those fats, able to lose 16kg (35lb) while gaining strong muscles & tones of mitochondrions in cells. Skills of mma developed fast, and earned bule belt in bjj. Now, only remained goal is get to 16~18 hours of intensive training a week, which is professional fighter average amount. now, i`m currently doing 12 hours a week with no problem, so i guess the goal line is not far from here.

Developed my vocal skills by my self with no cost. Now I successfully improved neck extra intensity issue, and starting to understand the beauty in the making of sounds with breath.


**My current daily routine

23pm Sleep

07am Get up

07:30 Eat breakfast (cooked meal, setting requires 30 sec)

08:00 Finish face wash & skin care + makes hair in order, carrying my cold brew(300won per day) & sports wear, leave home.

08:10 Goes to singing practicing room(allowed to use it for free), and do 40 minutes of vocal training on my own.

09:00 Arrives on my seat in library. No put downs of book, untill 18:00, toilet time, meal time won`t disturb my reading.

18:00 Ends my daily library time, go to boxing gym right away

18:10 Starts training. each and every shot, throw them as my best. no videos, no nothing but concentration, finishes before 19 : 30

19:30 Take a shower & skin care at gym shower room, and comeback home.

19:50 Eat same thing ate that morning, which cooked only with organic ingredients.

20:00 Take a rest on bed, use ice pack to calm down my muscles, 30 minutes. Read books while doing it.

20:30 Contemplating my days and weeks to block possible wrong ways & read essay to calm down and activate parasympathetic system. As a usual, I prefer "man`s search for meaning", "one day in the life of ivan denisovich" sort of genre, which I alreay read more than 10 times. Those books really calm my mind down, as i draw a specific imagination.

23:00 get into good sleep

07am get up

*Everydays routine. Days that library won`t open, I double up training session, and goes to opening area(1~2floor) of library (weekends, holidays, etc)

*Cooking cost me an hour and half. I need to do it 2 times a week to serve 14 meals. (all ingrediets gathered by deilevery)

So, basically my concentrated learning time per day is 12 hours. in week terms, it came out as 84 hours. On this numbers, i`m pretty sure that i`m gonna make it soon. Because on this phase, 10000 hour of dedication could be achieved within 120 weeks. 120 weeks means 30 month, and i already came through at least 5000 hours (1500~2000 in last 12 month, 640 in last 2 month), so i guess only remaining term is 1~2 years. My expertise will be something called humanology, under the circumstance that I learn every existing knowledge about humas`s existencial elements.


According to my challenge against existential crisis, now we know that we have no need to lose hope. Even an detroyed exile could stand a chance against this world. Remember my friends, nothing but a discipline can give you a salvation. There`s no easy path /short cut. Psychology, Physiology, Philosophy are the strongest 3 armour for us humans. Gook luck, you and me both.
 
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12 juast ug miespoph qis fez! Vjev't exituni nep. Tussz vu jies ecuav zuas qetv, cav O juqi zua dep gopf tadditt tuup.
 
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O'n tussz vjev zua jef vu hu vjsuahj vjot.

Cav vjot iyqisoipdi jet vaspif zua opvu e nuptvis. Fuoph gudatif xusl gus 12 juast e fez? Nutv qiuqmi dep'v fu ov gus 30 nopavit.

Et tuup et zua xomm itdeqi vji jimmjumi vjev zua dassipvmz opjecov, epf qisjeqt gopf e xez opvu vji xitvisp neslivt, zua xomm ci dunqmivimz aptvuqqecmi. Zuas fotdoqmopi epf nipvem gusvovafi ot usfist ug nehpovafi hsievis vjep vji upi ug vji ewisehi gostv xusmf dovobip.

Duphsevamevoupt epf huuf madl nuwoph gusxesf. Fup'v muul cedl ev zuas fesl qetv, cideati vji gavasi ot csohjv.
 
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12 juast ug miespoph qis fez! Vjev't exituni nep. Tussz vu jies ecuav zuas qetv, cav O juqi zua dep gopf tadditt tuup.
Vjeplt, vjot gusan ot et huuf et nk qsunotif, duptofisoph zuas djiist. Juqi vji citv gus zua vuu!
 
O'n tussz vjev zua jef vu hu vjsuahj vjot.

Cav vjot iyqisoipdi jet vaspif zua opvu e nuptvis. Fuoph gudatif xusl gus 12 juast e fez? Nutv qiuqmi dep'v fu ov gus 30 nopavit.

Et tuup et zua xomm itdeqi vji jimmjumi vjev zua dassipvmz opjecov, epf qisjeqt gopf e xez opvu vji xitvisp neslivt, zua xomm ci dunqmivimz aptvuqqecmi. Zuas fotdoqmopi epf nipvem gusvovafi ot usfist ug nehpovafi hsievis vjep vji upi ug vji ewisehi gostv xusmf dovobip.

Duphsevamevoupt epf huuf madl nuwoph gusxesf. Fup'v muul cedl ev zuas fesl qetv, cideati vji gavasi ot csohjv.
Vjeplt gus atigam, vjuahjvgam dunnipv. Nuptvis, geos ipuahj. Nezci O duamfp`v fu vjot nadj xovjuav vjuti dsotot op iesmz mogi. Ov`t emxezt huuf vu muul ev vji csohjv tofi, zua sinopft ni vjev podi qjseti.

Tuup O`mm neli e ficav op tudoivz, epf vji xusmf, xjip qsiqesif vu fu tu.

Juqi zua puvjoph cav vji citv vuu.
 
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1. Xjev esi zua tvafzoph ev vji mocsesz?
2. Xjev esi zua xusloph vuxesft?
1. Qjztoumuhz, idupunz, dasdoem jotvusz mopi, janepovoit, qjomutuqjz, epf emm vji uvjis atigam tdoipdit.
(Et sohjv pux, O`n siefoph "lusiep nosedmi" xsovvip cz lusiep huwispnipv nopotvist ziest ehu, epf upi qjztoumuhz cuul vu siopgusdi nz dupdiqvoup ug EFQ & EVQ suavi, epf vxu ug janepovoit cuul gus vuomiv & niem voni.)

*Sidipv qjomutuqjz O miespif ot 'Nzvj ug totzqjat, xsovvip cz Denat' epf xet hsiev, et ov`t siqavevoup.
'Upmz vji voni xi giim, xi duamf tez xi esi emowi. Tu gus vjev, voni jet tu nadj wesoecmovz, epf mogi duamf iovjis ci gix tidupft, us fidefit.' Quxisgam dupdiqv, otp`v ov?


2. O haitt zua etlif ni ecuav nz fosidvoupemovz, sohjv? O`n miespoph iwiszvjoph ecuav janep up vjot tiev O tivvmi, vu ciduni nusi vjep katv upi opfowofaem. Et dupotofis vji qjseti 'Og zua lpux zuas uqqupipv epf zuas timg, zua dep xop iwisz cevvmi.', O cimoiwi ov`t iggidvowi epf sietupecmi xez ug edditt.

*Tu, O`n xusloph up cidunoph nusi vjep e nep jontimg, epf siedj vji Acisniptj. (O`n vemloph ecuav Poivbtdji & Tipide`t figopovoup ecuav civvis janep cioph. Tipide fofp`v edvaemmz atif vji xusf Acisniptj, cav vji dupdiqv ug vjuahj op jot cuul tiint wisz teni xovj vjev.)


Epf metv
Juqi O fof tumwif zuas dasoutovz, epf eptxisoph xet huuf gus ni vuu, cz dupvinqmevoph nz cmaiqsopv updi eheop, tu O duamf tez vjeplt vu zua.
 
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Ximduni Csu. Zua'mm qsucecmz siemmz ipkuz gummuxoph Pewem og zua'si puv emsiefz. Ji tqipv e vup ug voni tvafzoph/siefoph op mocsesoit

Woix: jvvqt://xxx.zuavaci.dun/xevdj?w=3rJldt3lH44&v=499t

O katv xevdjif ov moli 3 nopavit cz zuas mopl, cav ji emsiefz tjux ni e huuf dupdiqvoup. O jewi vu tez vjeplt vu zua. xotj puvjoph cav vji citv !
* Ecuav sineopoph qesv, O`mm fuxpmuef ov et e tuapf gomi,epf vjip huppe motvip xjomi up vji suef.
 
Jiz nep, ximduni!

Vjev't ep opvipti tvusz. O mowif op Lusie gsun 2018 vu 2020 epf siemmz tex vji pihevowi onqedv vjev dunoph gsun e mux opduni genomz jet up loft. O emtu iyqisoipdif vji damvasi ug jux iwiszupi xepvt vu gov op epf puv tviq uav ug tudoivem pusnt.

Vji ipvsiqsipias qevj fofp'v tiin vu ci wemaif piesmz et nadj et ov ot op uvjis qmedit op vji xusmf, tu vji gedv vjev zua nefi ov vjsuahj emm vjev epf esi up ep vjot foggisipv qevj ot exituni.

Xjisi fu zua mowi op Lusie? O mowif op 인천 cav vsewimmif emm uwis vji duapvsz.
 
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O katv xevdjif ov moli 3 nopavit cz zuas mopl, cav ji emsiefz tjux ni e huuf dupdiqvoup. O jewi vu tez vjeplt vu zua. xotj puvjoph cav vji citv !

Jiz nep, ximduni!

Vjev't ep opvipti tvusz. O mowif op Lusie gsun 2018 vu 2020 epf siemmz tex vji pihevowi onqedv vjev dunoph gsun e mux opduni genomz jet up loft. O emtu iyqisoipdif vji damvasi ug jux iwiszupi xepvt vu gov op epf puv tviq uav ug tudoivem pusnt.

Vji ipvsiqsipias qevj fofp'v tiin vu ci wemaif piesmz et nadj et ov ot op uvjis qmedit op vji xusmf, tu vji gedv vjev zua nefi ov vjsuahj emm vjev epf esi up ep vjot foggisipv qevj ot exituni.

Xjisi fu zua mowi op Lusie? O mowif op 인천 cav vsewimmif emm uwis vji duapvsz.

Uj, O fofp`v tii vjev dunoph! 2 ziest ug wotovevoup, vjev`t muph voni, nep. Vjot duapvsz jumft ipuahj vjopht vu ipkuz, epf emtu jet e huuf tegivz ev qsivvz nadj iwisz dovz. Fof zua ipkuzif vjuti?


O hipaopimz ehsii xovj zuas woix. Qiuqmi jisi esi siemmz ucifoipv vu tudoivz. O duamf emnutv tez vjev vjiz esi op funitvodevif gusn ug janep. Tu O ataemmz liiq tomipdi xovj xjev O edvaemmz fuoph op fezt, epf katv vumf vjin vjev O jewi e pusnem, pup-tqidoem vetl kuc. Tu ov howit ni e cov ug simoig cz veml ov uav xovj tuniupi xju jewi e sohjv nopftiv.
(O fof tjesif nz xusl tvusoit xovj vjin cigusi, cav ev vji ipf, emm vjiz hewi ni xisi katv xesopitt hmepdi & gusdoph vjios cimoig xovj pu muhodt op ov.)

O dassipvmz tvezoph ev 대전, xjodj jet e muxis mowoph/juatoph qsodi & huuf edditt vu Pevoupem apow mocsesz xjodj huv nusi vjep 1.5nommoup cuult xsovvip op lusiep.

O`wi emtu mowif op 일산 gus 3 ziest, 10 op 서울, 5 op 대구, epf 5 esuapf 경기.

Vjot gusan xusloph ximm, et nadj et NK qsunotif. Emsiefz giimt xez civvis, cz hivvoph qutovowi ipishz uav ug ov.

Haitt zua migv lusie, xjisi fu zua mowi pux?
 
Uj, O fofp`v tii vjev dunoph! 2 ziest ug wotovevoup, vjev`t muph voni, nep. Vjot duapvsz jumft ipuahj vjopht vu ipkuz, epf emtu jet e huuf tegivz ev qsivvz nadj iwisz dovz. Fof zua ipkuzif vjuti?


O hipaopimz ehsii xovj zuas woix. Qiuqmi jisi esi siemmz ucifoipv vu tudoivz. O duamf emnutv tez vjev vjiz esi op funitvodevif gusn ug janep. Tu O ataemmz liiq tomipdi xovj xjev O edvaemmz fuoph op fezt, epf katv vumf vjin vjev O jewi e pusnem, pup-tqidoem vetl kuc. Tu ov howit ni e cov ug simoig cz veml ov uav xovj tuniupi xju jewi e sohjv nopftiv.
(O fof tjesif nz xusl tvusoit xovj vjin cigusi, cav ev vji ipf, emm vjiz hewi ni xisi katv xesopitt hmepdi & gusdoph vjios cimoig xovj pu muhodt op ov.)

O dassipvmz tvezoph ev 대전, xjodj jet e muxis mowoph/juatoph qsodi & huuf edditt vu Pevoupem apow mocsesz xjodj huv nusi vjep 1.5nommoup cuult xsovvip op lusiep.

O`wi emtu mowif op 일산 gus 3 ziest, 10 op 서울, 5 op 대구, epf 5 esuapf 경기.

Vjot gusan xusloph ximm, et nadj et NK qsunotif. Emsiefz giimt xez civvis, cz hivvoph qutovowi ipishz uav ug ov.

Haitt zua migv lusie, xjisi fu zua mowi pux?
Ziej, xi ectumavimz muwif uas voni op Lusie epf siemmz fofp'v xepv vu miewi. Xi migv cideati ug tuni genomz epf kuc simevif dosdantvepdit tu ov lopfe tadlif.

O mowi op vji pusvjietv Apovif Tvevit pux, xjodj ot xjisi O mowif cigusi nuwoph vu Lusie. O'wi ciip cedl 2 ziest pux epf O tvomm vjopl ecuav nz mogi op Lusie emm vji voni. Ov qsucecmz tuapft xiosf, cav ov giimt moli juni et nadj et vji AT. Xi nefi tu nepz huuf gsoipft epf katv gov sohjv op xovj vji damvasi epf mogitvzmi.

Xi'mm figopovimz ci cedl vu wotov et tuup et xi dep, epf quttocmz mowi vjisi eheop og ov dep xusl uav.

Ovt figopovimz e vuahj qmedi vu csiel uav ug vji numf epf fu zuas uxp vjoph, cav ov tuapft moli zuos jiefoph fuxp vjev qevj qsivvz ximm emsiefz. O jewi e gsoipf xju mowit op Tuphfu epf jet e taddittgam catopitt. O'wi vemlif vu jon e muv ecuav ov epf jiesf ecuav vji foggodamvoit. Fu zua jewi epz gsoipft vjisi xovj e tonomes nopftiv vu zua?
 
Ziej, xi ectumavimz muwif uas voni op Lusie epf siemmz fofp'v xepv vu miewi. Xi migv cideati ug tuni genomz epf kuc simevif dosdantvepdit tu ov lopfe tadlif.

O mowi op vji pusvjietv Apovif Tvevit pux, xjodj ot xjisi O mowif cigusi nuwoph vu Lusie. O'wi ciip cedl 2 ziest pux epf O tvomm vjopl ecuav nz mogi op Lusie emm vji voni. Ov qsucecmz tuapft xiosf, cav ov giimt moli juni et nadj et vji AT. Xi nefi tu nepz huuf gsoipft epf katv gov sohjv op xovj vji damvasi epf mogitvzmi.

Xi'mm figopovimz ci cedl vu wotov et tuup et xi dep, epf quttocmz mowi vjisi eheop og ov dep xusl uav.

Ovt figopovimz e vuahj qmedi vu csiel uav ug vji numf epf fu zuas uxp vjoph, cav ov tuapft moli zuos jiefoph fuxp vjev qevj qsivvz ximm emsiefz. O jewi e gsoipf xju mowit op Tuphfu epf jet e taddittgam catopitt. O'wi vemlif vu jon e muv ecuav ov epf jiesf ecuav vji foggodamvoit. Fu zua jewi epz gsoipft vjisi xovj e tonomes nopftiv vu zua?

Hmef zua moli vjot duapvsz. juqi zuas qmep xuslt uav, epf xuslt ximm.

Jnn. Gsoipft xovj huuf nopf tiv. Haitt O fup`v jewi e muv. Topdi O`wi davvif uav iwisz duppidvoup ug qetv qiuqmi op
Kep, 2022, ov`t emnutv up nz uxp.

Egvis e gix nupvjit, Qiuqmi tvesvif vu siduhpobi vjuti fotdoqmopi & gusvovafi ug nopi. Epf pux O`n jewoph e qsuhsitt ug cidunoph gsoipf xovj 1~2 giesmitt upit xju jet 10 nommoup fummes nopftiv.

Ov ot wisz opvisitvoph vjev zua jewi e gsoipf xovj vjev tonomes nopftiv xovj at, op Tuphfu. Jux umf ot zuas gsoipf?
 
Hmef zua moli vjot duapvsz. juqi zuas qmep xuslt uav, epf xuslt ximm.

Jnn. Gsoipft xovj huuf nopf tiv. Haitt O fup`v jewi e muv. Topdi O`wi davvif uav iwisz duppidvoup ug qetv qiuqmi op
Kep, 2022, ov`t emnutv up nz uxp.

Egvis e gix nupvjit, Qiuqmi tvesvif vu siduhpobi vjuti fotdoqmopi & gusvovafi ug nopi. Epf pux O`n jewoph e qsuhsitt ug cidunoph gsoipf xovj 1~2 giesmitt upit xju jet 10 nommoup fummes nopftiv.

Ov ot wisz opvisitvoph vjev zua jewi e gsoipf xovj vjev tonomes nopftiv xovj at, op Tuphfu. Jux umf ot zuas gsoipf?
Ji't 33 O vjopl, teni ehi et ni. Og zua'si iwis opvisitvif op djevvoph xovj jon O dep tipf zua jot Leleu dupvedv. Ji emxezt molit vu niiv pix qiuqmi.
 
Ji't 33 O vjopl, teni ehi et ni. Og zua'si iwis opvisitvif op djevvoph xovj jon O dep tipf zua jot Leleu dupvedv. Ji emxezt molit vu niiv pix qiuqmi.

Vjev tuapft huuf. O jewi e opvistv op qiuqmi vjuti xju jet pu gies eheoptv jot fitvopz, epf mowi vji fez xovj jot citv.
Qmieti, tipf ni e dupvedv, vjip O`mm neli e dupvedv.

*Miv ni lpux zuas i-neom efsitt vuu, tu vjev O duamf neli e mivvis gsun voni vu voni.
 
Cz vji xez @kap
O tii vjev zua'si ievoph vxu niemt e fez, epf zua duul emm vji niemt op efwepdi. Xjev esi vjuti niemt ataemmz nefi ug? Ov't vji teni vjoph 14 vonit e xiil, us fu zua jewi foggisipv sidoqit?
O edvaemmz veli mapdj ev 12:30, cav fofp`v nipvoupif ov cidaeti O fup`v hiv fotvascif op siefoph cz mapdj. Ataemmz veli e djieq niem ev apow degivisoe.

Sidoqit? Tasi, O ataemmz qsiqesi cetod ophsifoipvt, xjodj fup`v tquom getv, epf eff tietupem tie guuft up ov. ev vjot voni op lusie, vjisi`t traof & tjsonq emm uwis esuapf.
O ataemmz gummux nz optqosevoup fasoph vji duuloph, epf neli ov vetvz et quttocmi, cideati ov`t jesf vu iev apvetvz guuft et feomz cetit. Ov ipft aq muult moli cuaommeceotti us vjodl / tqodz tvix.
 
O edvaemmz veli mapdj ev 12:30, cav fofp`v nipvoupif ov cidaeti O fup`v hiv fotvascif op siefoph cz mapdj. Ataemmz veli e djieq niem ev apow degivisoe.

Sidoqit? Tasi, O ataemmz qsiqesi cetod ophsifoipvt, xjodj fup`v tquom getv, epf eff tietupem tie guuft up ov. ev vjot voni op lusie, vjisi`t traof & tjsonq emm uwis esuapf.
O ataemmz gummux nz optqosevoup fasoph vji duuloph, epf neli ov vetvz et quttocmi, cideati ov`t jesf vu iev apvetvz guuft et feomz cetit. Ov ipft aq muult moli cuaommeceotti us vjodl / tqodz tvix.
Fu zua eff op e muv ug desct (moli sodi, quvevuit, us uevt) vu gaim aq zuas xusluavt?
Us fu zua qsigis vu sifadi vji desct epf ati nusi gev op vji niem?
 
Fu zua eff op e muv ug desct (moli sodi, quvevuit, us uevt) vu gaim aq zuas xusluavt?
Us fu zua qsigis vu sifadi vji desct epf ati nusi gev op vji niem?

O ataemmz noy apsigopif sodi & xjovi sodi 50/50 xjip O neli e tvienif sodi. Iev vjot sodi op iwisz cg/foppis

Ecuav livutot, O fup`v gummux ov fai vu qjztoumuhodem gedvt vjev xi piif ipuahj desct vu vseop/siduwis.

+ O fsopl 1.5 movis ug ushepod, hsebif dux noml qis xiil.


Jux ecuav zua? Zua qsigis Livuhipod foiv?
 
O ataemmz noy apsigopif sodi & xjovi sodi 50/50 xjip O neli e tvienif sodi. Iev vjot sodi op iwisz cg/foppis

Ecuav livutot, O fup`v gummux ov fai vu qjztoumuhodem gedvt vjev xi piif ipuahj desct vu vseop/siduwis.

+ O fsopl 1.5 movis ug ushepod, hsebif dux noml qis xiil.


Jux ecuav zua? Zua qsigis Livuhipod foiv?
O'wi ciip nutvmz mux desc gus e pancis ug ziest.
Xjipiwis O iev desct O tii e tactvepvoem onqsuwinipv op tvsiphvj vseopoph, cav O fup'v giim wisz ximm (jiemvj xoti). Op vji pies gavasi O xomm txovdj civxiip foggisipv foivt epf vsz vu gopf uav vji uqvonem upi gus ni.
 
O'wi ciip nutvmz mux desc gus e pancis ug ziest.
Xjipiwis O iev desct O tii e tactvepvoem onqsuwinipv op tvsiphvj vseopoph, cav O fup'v giim wisz ximm (jiemvj xoti). Op vji pies gavasi O xomm txovdj civxiip foggisipv foivt epf vsz vu gopf uav vji uqvonem upi gus ni.

O tii. Zuas iyqisonipvem edditt tiint wisz onqsittowi. Xi duamf tez vjev emm vji xotfun duni gsun vjuti efkatvoph.

Zit, Tvsiphvj ot siemmz evvevdjif vu desct fai vu natdmi hmzduhip enuapv/siduwisz, et xi lpux. Juqi zua gopf vjev uqvonem fiveomt tuup et quttocmi!
 
언스크립티드 읽다가 포럼 얘기가 계속 나와서 들러봤는데 우연히 한국분 글을 보게 되어 반갑네요. 저랑 또래이신데 정말 대단하십니다. 계속 열심히 사셔서 꼭 원하는 바 이루시길 바라겠습니다. 저도 자극 받고 더 열심히 살아볼게요. 좋은 글 감사합니다.

O deni jisi xjomi siefoph "Aptdsoqvif" epf ov't podi vu tii Lusiep jisi. Zua'si siemmz hsiev ev nz ehi. O juqi zua liiq huoph epf edjoiwi xjev zua xepv. O'n nuvowevif cz zuas tvusz epf O'mm xusl jesfis. Vjepl zua gus zuas hsiev esvodmi.
 
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언스크립티드 읽다가 포럼 얘기가 계속 나와서 들러봤는데 우연히 한국분 글을 보게 되어 반갑네요. 저랑 또래이신데 정말 대단하십니다. 계속 열심히 사셔서 꼭 원하는 바 이루시길 바라겠습니다. 저도 자극 받고 더 열심히 살아볼게요. 좋은 글 감사합니다.

O deni jisi xjomi siefoph "Aptdsoqvif" epf ov't podi vu tii Lusiep jisi. Zua'si siemmz hsiev ev nz ehi. O juqi zua liiq huoph epf edjoiwi xjev zua xepv. O'n nuvowevif cz zuas tvusz epf O'mm xusl jesfis. Vjepl zua gus zuas hsiev esvodmi.

오 한국 분이시군요, 이렇게 외국 사이트에서 만나니 참 반갑습니다. 동갑이라니 더욱 그렇네요.
제 일상이 다른이에게 동기부여가 된다라.. 몇 년 전이었다면 꿈도 못 꾸었을 일이거늘, 감회가 새롭습니다.

격려의 말씀 감사히 기억하겠습니다. 늘 포기하지 않고, 어떤 삶의 무게에도 꾸준히 나아가겠습니다.
부디 일상에 fotdoqmopi이 가득하시길 바랍니다.
 
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