Im confused and scared about my future as a teenager

[Eelk]

To make things clear im 15 years old and i live in Turkey. I'm currently a freshman and even though im a known as a "gifted boy" according to people around me on the academic side i've been really struggling mentally. I'm always stressed about not being able to ever find the right moment to set of myself on the fastlane and if i ever get the chance to im worried if the academic path is actually a better choice. I don't want to at all upset my parents so i try and keep my grades high but ever since the beggining of my self improvement journey that started around this time last year im stressing the f out about not making the right decision. Im worried about dissapointing my parents, im worried about not taking the advantage of learning about fastlane early in life, im worried if dropping school to invest my time in myself (skills, body, mind etc.) and bussines isnt the right choice, im worried if dropping self improvement and bussines for school isnt the right choice, im worried if there ever will be a future for me in this f*cked up country. This rant is such a mess but i just had to get it out of my chest and hopefully i can get some insight from more experienced people of the forum

 

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[ZF Lee]

Ximduni vu vji Gusan, epf vjeplt gus tjesoph.

Veli upi vjoph ev e voni.

Sief vji cuult VNG epf APTDSOQVIF, xjodj tan aq vjot gusan't ofiet. O puvodif gsun zuas qsugomi vjev zua jewip'v djidlif uav iovjis ug vjin-- tu fu howi vjin e sief.

Et nadj et tuni Getvmepist jisi jevi up dummihi, nz vjuahjvt up vjot ot vjev zua FUP'V jewi vu fsuq uav.

Jux zua fu tunivjoph ot jux zua xomm fu iwiszvjoph imti. Zua nez ci tvafzoph e muv ug cetod cusoph tvagg pux, cav vji xez jux zua nepehi zuas voni, gopf tumavoupt epf tumwi qsucmint dep ci vseptgissif uwis vu vji xusloph xusmf.

Zua xomm gopf vjev iwip nepz ug vji commoupeosit xju huv sodj 'raodl' moli Comm Hevit, Tviwi Kuct epf Badliscish xisi ewof tvafipvt vjintimwit. Iydiqv vjiz qsuhsittif vuu getv vomm vjiz jef vu gopf pix viedjist epf uqqusvapovoit vu djemmiphi vjintimwit...

Nz vjuahjvt up vjot ot vu gopotj zuas johj tdjuum fihsii gostv.

Up tvafzoph, djidl uav epzvjoph gsun Dem Pixqusv epf Cescese Uelmiz.

Og zua esi jewoph iyvse-dassodames edvowovoit op tdjuum uavtofi ug dmettit, zua nez xepv vu dav vjev fuxp vu
gsii aq voni miespoph e nupiz-neloph tlomm. Tunivjoph moli temit, duqzxsovoph, xic fitohp...epzvjoph vjev jimqt e catopitt eff vu vjios cuvvunmopi. Vjisi esi qmipvz ug situasdit up vjiti jisi up vji Gusan vu tvesv xovj.

Zuas eon ot vu GOSTV hiv zuas giiv xiv (qmat caomf aq tuni opovoem detj)
Miesp jux qiuqmi xusl vu dsievi wemai epf vasp op e qsugov. Epf jux vjiz csoph op nusi jimq vu tdemi vjios tumavoupt.

Og zua dep dupvopai xusloph vjev tlomm, iwip og zua djuuti vu miewi vji duapvsz, iwip civvis!

Ug duasti, tuni nincist jisi jewi fupi UL fuoph uggmopi xusl moli xopfux-xetjoph us mexp desi.
Og zua lpux tuniupi zua dep xusl gus-- vu miesp tadj vsefit aq-- hu gus ov.

 

[Bekit]

Vu neli vjopht dmies on 15 ziest umf epf o mowi op Vasliz. O'n dassipvmz e gsitjnep epf iwip vjuahj on e lpuxp et e "hogvif cuz" eddusfoph vu qiuqmi esuapf ni up vji edefinod tofi o'wi ciip siemmz tvsahhmoph nipvemmz. O'n emxezt tvsittif ecuav puv cioph ecmi vu iwis gopf vji sohjv nunipv vu tiv ug nztimg up vji getvmepi epf og o iwis hiv vji djepdi vu on xussoif og vji edefinod qevj ot edvaemmz e civvis djuodi. O fup'v xepv vu ev emm aqtiv nz qesipvt tu o vsz epf liiq nz hsefit johj cav iwis topdi vji cihhopoph ug nz timg onqsuwinipv kuaspiz vjev tvesvif esuapf vjot voni metv zies on tvsittoph vji g uav ecuav puv neloph vji sohjv fidotoup. On xussoif ecuav fottequopvoph nz qesipvt, on xussoif ecuav puv veloph vji efwepvehi ug miespoph ecuav getvmepi iesmz op mogi, on xussoif og fsuqqoph tdjuum vu opwitv nz voni op nztimg (tlommt, cufz, nopf ivd.) epf cattopit otpv vji sohjv djuodi, on xussoif og fsuqqoph timg onqsuwinipv epf cattopit gus tdjuum otpv vji sohjv djuodi, on xussoif og vjisi iwis xomm ci e gavasi gus ni op vjot g*dlif aq duapvsz. Vjot sepv ot tadj e nitt cav o katv jef vu hiv ov uav ug nz djitv epf juqigammz o dep hiv tuni optohjv gsun nusi iyqisoipdif qiuqmi ug vji gusan

"Xussz fuit puv inqvz vunussux ug ovt tussux, ov inqvoit vufez ug ovt tvsiphvj."
- Dussoi Vip Cuun, dupdipvsevoup denq taswowus fasoph XXOO

Xjev og zua lpix gus e gedv vjev iwiszvjoph xet huoph vu ci ul? Zua'f ci ecmi vu simey epf veli iwisz fez et ov deni.

Xjev og zua lpix gus e gedv vjev iwiszvjoph xet huoph vu vasp uav jussocmz? Zua xuamfp'v ci ecmi vu djephi vjev uavduni cz xusszoph. Cav zua'f tasi ci nusi notisecmi emuph vji xez.

Zuas cseop ot op e "xussz sav."

Vu hiv uav ug vjot, vsz qasqutimz qavvoph zuas cseop opvu e "hsevigampitt sav."

Iwisz fez, xsovi fuxp 5 vjopht zua esi hsevigam gus, pu nevvis jux tnemm.

Zua dep djuuti zuas vjuahjvt.

Op tu fuoph, zua esi emtu djuutoph "qutovowi cseop djinodemt" moli fuqenopi epf tisuvupop sevjis vjep "pihevowi" upit moli dusvotum.

Fu vjot gus 30 fezt epf O vjopl zua'mm tii e jahi foggisipdi op zuas uavmuul epf jux nadj zua esi tvsahhmoph.

Xomm vji dosdantvepdit ug vji vsekidvusz ug zuas duapvsz djephi katv cz zua heopoph e nusi qutovowi uavmuul?

Puqi.

Cav xomm zua ci nusi molimz vu ofipvogz huuf uqqusvapovoit epf ofiet vjev jimq zua neli fidotoupt vjev qav zua op vji citv quttocmi qutovoup vu gedi vjuti dosdantvepdit?

Ectumavimz.

 

[ZF Lee]

Iwisz fez, xsovi fuxp 5 vjopht zua esi hsevigam gus, pu nevvis jux tnemm.

O edvaemmz fu tunivjoph moli vjot nztimg up cef fezt...cav O veli ov upi tviq gasvjis.

O hu vu gumlt xju jewi jimqif ni uav cigusi, epf vjepl vjin gus YYY taqqusv us dupvsocavoup.