<div class="bbWrapper">Very small, easy things to implement that helped me go from socially awkward / anxious to outgoing and a social butterfly: <br />
<br />
1. Care about your appearance. <br />
<br />
Many shy people tend to have this "sheltered" look to them. Messy, uncut, unstyled hair, inconsistent shaving habits, mismatched outfits, footwear that's inappropriate for the time/place, weird hat choices, etc... <br />
<br />
Set aside the graphic tee's, cargo pants, hiking boots, knee socks, and fedoras. Go get yourself a set of brightly colored, simple, collared shirts and/or t-shirts (short sleeve polos are great, same with solid-color tees). Get a pair of shoes that are good in most situations - not a jogger's running shoe and not a hiking boot. There's a million options to choose from but honestly - spend a day or so noticing the footwear of people who look like they know what's going on in life and buy something similar. Get some ankle-length socks that match your shoes. Lose the hat entirely for now. <br />
<br />
Shave at least every other day. A day's stubble looks fine on most men. After that you look like you're on vacation. <br />
<br />
Go to a proper barber and get an evergreen haircut. Personally I sit down and say "Number 3 on the sides, just shorter than finger length on top" and call it a day. It's short, professional, and looks good in any situation. You do you, but stay away from trends or high upkeep styles unless you know what you're doing. <br />
<br />
While it's good advice to never judge a book by it's cover, it's even better advice to understand that EVERYONE DOES THIS ANYWAY. Make your book look like something other people want to read the hell out of. <br />
<br />
In short - DRESS AND LOOK LIKE AN ADULT.<br />
<br />
2. Head up, Eye Contact, Smile. <br />
<br />
Make it a new challenge - any time you need to interact with someone, walk towards them with your head up, look them in the eye, and smile when they make eye contact. Doesn't matter if it's at the mall, at the dentist, at work or a hotel clerk. Bonus points if you say hello first. <br />
<br />
You'll notice something neat - they'll smile at you back at least 90% of the time and you'll feel like you brightened up their day. They'll treat you nicer from the very beginning and you'll get your way far more often. It's like a magic trick for people. Although be warned - this only works if you already took care of your appearance. Again - nobody wants to pick up a shitty looking book. <br />
<br />
Oh, that other 10% that don't smile back? They are either broken, dead inside, or you caught them at a shit time - keep it brief, to the point and move on. <br />
<br />
3. Make decisions. <br />
<br />
You wouldn't believe how well this works to convey to others that you have a personality. Shy people never make decisions. They always try to accommodate others. If your answer to the question "what do you want to eat tonight?" is "oh I don't care, I could go for anything, what do you want?" - you're doing things wrong. <br />
<br />
Always try to answer other people's questions (especially the simple ones) with a definite answer. If you're caught off guard, you can always say "huh, great question, let me figure that out". Then figure it out, then tell them, then do that. <br />
<br />
Shy people don't make decisions. That's just an unwritten rule that everyone understands. If you make decisions, you will not come off as shy, no matter how simple the question is that you are making a decision about. What to pick up for snacks? Mixed nuts. Dinner? Pizza. What do you want to do? Movie. What did you want to do next weekend? Camping. Where to meet up downtown? That new brew pub. Just pick something. They don't have to like it or even accept it - but throw SOMETHING out and let them push back on it. <br />
<br />
--------------------------<br />
<br />
That's it - 3 simple things anyone can do to immediately improve their lives and it didn't require any herculean amount of effort. You got a haircut, bought some new clothes, lifted your head 3 inches and smiled at people, and told people what the hell you want to eat tonight. <br />
<br />
IMHO this is the 80/20 principal at work. Your outwards appearance looks confident so people will assume you are confident. You made eye contact and said hello first with a smile so people assume you're a friendly, confident person. You had answers to the simplest of questions when asked and now you've proven that you aren't just a mirror or brick wall when people talk to you. <br />
<br />
Welcome to the land of "I look and act like I have my shit together". Population: You.</div>
