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The "Astonishing Secrets" Thread

Nicoknowsbest

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5 Lessons I Learned From This Thread That Will Change Your Life. I Promise.

Wow, what a thread! After digesting all the information presented in this thread, I can't help it but feel humble and thankful for having the chance to read all this. First of all, @IceCreamKid, you are a madman. Mad respect for what you have done, but most of all for the person you've become on your journey! I feel deep respect for all the people that made you what you are today. I want to build @MJ DeMarco a shrine for giving us this forum. @zen*******, you are simply incredible. All the other legends that were mentioned: I haven't made it through your stuff yet, but I am coming for you :) Guys, I want to express my gratitude, respect and appreciation for what you've done - THANK YOU.

The 5 lessons from this thread that changed my life:

LESSON 01.
People first, money second.
The ones that aren't rich usually have this picture in mind, that the rich are rich, because they put money above everyone and everything. They don't care about humans. They don't care about you. They only care about your money and how it will come to them. Until I read this thread, I was one of these people. Now I understood that if you are "money blind", you miss out on a lot of opportunities. Opportunities you only see when you follow lesson number two.

LESSON 02.
Love the hell out of others.
If you love the hell out of people, you will be respectful. Respect for others and their circumstances is one of the best ways to understand why we are like we are and you start appreciating how people are. You start understanding that in order to receive, you need to GIVE first. Why would you be the chosen one that can TAKE first? If you love people, you are one with yourself and the power that lies within you. You will be GRATEFUL for all the things you have, instead of being sad about your shortcomings. Once you manage to put yourself into this state of love, you will start showing a genuine interest for people. Suddenly, you will realize the pains and needs of the people around you. Needs that you can solve. Needs that show you how to provide value and give back to people. As a result, you will receive. A lot of ice-cream.

LESSON 03.
Be a kid.
When we were small, we didn't care what people thought. We explored, experimented and invented. We were curious, asked a ton of questions and started to understand how things work. We observed. We dreamed. We created. We were not shy to present our work to our parents, to our family, even to strangers. We didn't care about rules. We ignored the ways the grown-ups were doing certain things. We had our own ways. We would think for ourselves.

Why is it that once we are grown up, these things change? Why are we embarrassed to talk to people about our inventions. Why are we not curious anymore? Why did we stop creating?

LESSON 04.
The F*ck It Point.
How badly do you want it? You don't have money for food, you don't sell anything, but you can go to your grandmother for food? You can always ask daddy to pay your rent? Your girlfriend to pay your drinks? Mommy to pay your petrol? You are afraid of what people might think that you don't have a proper job? That you are one of these crazy people that think they can build businesses and actually earn money that way?

At a certain point in your life, after a long period of not being committed a 100% to following your dream, building that business and actually make it, there will come the point where you say: "F*ck it!". You stop caring about the naysayers, about the doubters and the sarcastic ones. You decided to commit yourself 100% and not sleep until you make a sale. This is where you need to be.

LESSON 05.
Pick Up The F****** Phone.
After you have followed lesson one to four, you found a need, you know how to provide value and you are ready to give it all you've got and more. So what now? You start picking up the f****** phone. You make the phone your best friend. Before you burn yourself, your money and your time, you need to verify the solution you will be providing in combination with the need of your market. How do you do this? You pick up the phone and ask people if they are willing to buy what you are planning to offer. PRESELL. We all want to be hustlers, now it is time to actually become one. The keyword here is active action: everything that is not connected to getting new clients and selling your product is an excuse not to pick up the phone. Leave the paperwork and do real work. And keep in mind: It is nice if you want to make $ 10 million within 3 years. @IceCreamKid challenges you to make your first dollar from something you've created within the first month.

It is not about your ideas. It is not about what you want. It is about the people. It is about what they need. It is about providing real value to real people and help them what they are struggling with. Go out and do it.
 
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IceCreamKid

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one shot too many, busted...


Wait, what? 16 seconds of my life...gone forever. No one has made me respond wtf in my head the way you just did, my friend. For that I must give you a post that is the foundation of business and life.

The Rule That Governs My Life

Some people call it karma. It goes much deeper than that though. There is an unwritten rule that governs all exchanges and it determines that whatever you give out to the world, the world MUST return that EXACT same value to you.

As an entrepreneur, you are dedicated to the activity of giving value because it is tattooed on your heart that this unwritten rule holds true. You don't focus your mental space on how much money you can make because you truly believe in your core that as long as you give value, you will receive that same value in the form of cash.

Now here's the pitfall that most fall into:
If you're giving value, but your heart isn't in the right place then the rule ultimately works against you. There are those who give plenty away, but they do it out of fear or pride. They often end up broke and unfulfilled because their heart is not aligned in truth and love.

Genuine giving is an act of sincere joy from the heart, and comes from a place of MASSIVE abundance. When you give without ANY attachment to what you can personally gain, the rule works FOR you and rewards you in direct proportion to the value which you have created.

Bottom line, don't focus on the money. Such a focus will do you no good. It must be viewed as a respected servant for you, but nothing more. If you view it as your master, it will have an uncontrolled destructive impact on your life.

Take action daily, my brothers and sisters.
 
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G.Wyatt

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IceCreamKid,
You have brought tears to my eyes.
This is day 1 for me after stumbling across this forum. I have spent my whole life hearing the words "you care too much about everyone else, you will never get anywhere with that attitude" "stop thinking about what others want" and "your too nice". So for 28 years, I have believed that my mindset is flawed, and have been steeling myself and putting up walls and blocking out others wants and needs because it is the "wrong thing to do". Even the books that I have read are all about empowering yourself, not to mention the Psychologists advice that making other people happy won't make me happy (which it does, leading me to a spiralling downwards "something is wrong with me" mentality)

So, without continuing on my rant here, THANK YOU. This is the first time I have come across the mentality of helping others IS worthwhile, and the only thing worth doing. I will continue to peruse this site, break down my walls and begin listening to people again.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Day one on here has been a blessing.
 
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G.Wyatt

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Once you learn you can do this, you can really see how you can influence others through your own behavior. It's amazing to see how much influence you truly do have by exuding positive energy.

I have been in 'autopilot' for years. Looking out the window at everyone else's achievements, not realising the only thing I needed to do was to take hold of the steering wheel again...and just move it slightly. Sometimes people like me, who have been emotionally 'beaten' for so long, need someone like you to just help them put their hand on the wheel and whisper "just a fraction of a turn". Its amazing how one small movement can change the road you were travelling down.
 

smarty

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I have been in 'autopilot' for years. Looking out the window at everyone else's achievements, not realising the only thing I needed to do was to take hold of the steering wheel again...and just move it slightly. Sometimes people like me, who have been emotionally 'beaten' for so long, need someone like you to just help them put their hand on the wheel and whisper "just a fraction of a turn". Its amazing how one small movement can change the road you were travelling down.

Write down this feeling, for after 10 months you may read this post again and realize "hell, I haven't changed at all". We always tend to think we will feel differently in the future, only to realize few years later that we're just the same person with new limitations.
 

G.Wyatt

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As I have been going through the pages on this thread, I have noticed the constant that people are asking how do they take action, and then not taking action.

Are you afraid? Fear comes in a sorts of disguises: anxiety, depression, helplessness, and paralysis. Before you can take action on an external "thing" - you must take action internally.

Start acknowledging the truth about yourself. Love and accept that you have fear, and turn that into power.

Easier said than done? I know. I have been paralysed by fear of rejection and feeling like I am a fraud for close to 5 years now, But here I am, taking control of my anxiety that people will think I am silly/stupid/naïveté for being here and posting this (surely I have nothing of value to say that has not already been said by someone bigger and better than me) going out of my comfort zone and taking a risk.

So...without having read any copy yet: HOW I CHANGED MY FUTURE IN LESS THAN 10 MIN, WITH THIS ONE SIMPLE STEP

Mindset is everything, and if you haven't already learnt that, go back to the beginning of this thread and start again.
Flick the switch on fear and turn it into a position of inner power.

What we tell ourselves ... Becomes ourself.
You are manipulated by your own words. Words are powerful. You can lift someone up with a word, or you can crush them with eon as well. Same goes to you my friend. You can get yourself to do what you want to with words. Or you can destroy yourself with words. Take these examples:
can't ..................won't
It's not my fault...........I'm responsible
I hope..............I know
If only ............. Next time
It's terrible..........it's an experience I can learn from

Just by changing those words, you go from being weak and disempowered to in control and powerful. I can't help you becomes I won't help you, it's not my fault I lost my cat (he wanders) ....I hope writing this will help my confidence....I know writing this will help with my confidence.

Stop being the victim and take control of your words.
 
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IceCreamKid

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There is not anybody bigger or better than you...

Man...I really like this SteveO guy.

I often think about the concepts of fear, confidence, and self worth. We're born into this world without any fear and with very high confidence. Then as we get older, society starts cutting away at all of that.

At a young age they tell us, "You can't do X,Y, or Z. You're not old enough, smart enough, tall enough, strong enough, pretty enough". Our brain ends up getting "viruses" installed into our inner "software" and without an anti-virus scan, we don't even realize all that muck is operating and controlling us through our subconscious.

This is why 95% of people struggle like hell to create a successful biz. It's not an issue of having enough info. We have all the info and action items we need thanks to Google, libraries, forums, and books. The real issue is being able to clear the mental blocks that were "installed" into our brain software at youth.

All of us are more powerful than we know.
 

timmy

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Man...I really like this SteveO guy.

I often think about the concepts of fear, confidence, and self worth. We're born into this world without any fear and with very high confidence. Then as we get older, society starts cutting away at all of that.

At a young age they tell us, "You can't do X,Y, or Z. You're not old enough, smart enough, tall enough, strong enough, pretty enough". Our brain ends up getting "viruses" installed into our inner "software" and without an anti-virus scan, we don't even realize all that muck is operating and controlling us through our subconscious.

This is why 95% of people struggle like hell to create a successful biz. It's not an issue of having enough info. We have all the info and action items we need thanks to Google, libraries, forums, and books. The real issue is being able to clear the mental blocks that were "installed" into our brain software at youth.
All of us are more powerful than we know.

Reading interesting stuff about brain plasticity by Dr. Mike Merzenich a 72 year old professor of neuroscience. Just thought I'd throw it in here as it relates to this discussion....It's all about rewiring the brain and clearing mental blocks. Great scientific insight into improving mindset and supercharging your brain with mental exercises some free on BrainHQ .com .....and his website is Positscience. I do hope some of you find it as interesting as I did. Information is power
 
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smarty

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I feel totally in love and in touch with everything today. Last night I had an amazing meditation experience and today as soon as I woke up, I went out and I felt like I was walking in a dream, literally all the way. I still feel like that while I'm writing this post :D

My old daily worries try to come up every now and again but they have no meaning, no power at all. This is a higher level of consciousness, literally.

Right now EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE and in my finger tips!
In this GOD mental-mode reality seems so easy, I just did some great work on a side project.

For me this is the definitive feeling of freedom - it starts with mental freedom and mental freedom is pure flow of love.
Creating value from this place seems so much lighter...

Get in touch with your inner child.
 
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Testament

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Wait, what? 16 seconds of my life...gone forever. No one has made me respond wtf in my head the way you just did, my friend. For that I must give you a post that is the foundation of business and life.

The Rule That Governs My Life

Some people call it karma. It goes much deeper than that though. There is an unwritten rule that governs all exchanges and it determines that whatever you give out to the world, the world MUST return that EXACT same value to you.

As an entrepreneur, you are dedicated to the activity of giving value because it is tattooed on your heart that this unwritten rule holds true. You don't focus your mental space on how much money you can make because you truly believe in your core that as long as you give value, you will receive that same value in the form of cash.

Now here's the pitfall that most fall into:
If you're giving value, but your heart isn't in the right place then the rule ultimately works against you. There are those who give plenty away, but they do it out of fear or pride. They often end up broke and unfulfilled because their heart is not aligned in truth and love.

Genuine giving is an act of sincere joy from the heart, and comes from a place of MASSIVE abundance. When you give without ANY attachment to what you can personally gain, the rule works FOR you and rewards you in direct proportion to the value which you have created.

Bottom line, don't focus on the money. Such a focus will do you no good. It must be viewed as a respected servant for you, but nothing more. If you view it as your master, it will have an uncontrolled destructive impact on your life.

Take action daily, my brothers and sisters.

You pen words with such stirring passion. Every time I read a post of yours, I feel moved beyond anything else I can remember having read in a long time. I can see from reading the hundreds of posts from our fellow fastlane siblings here that this condition isn't exclusive to myself. It goes far beyond any copy I've ever seen before...and I'm totally fascinated by this ability of yours.

Did you learn to write in such an electrifying, emotionally-rousing way? Or was it a talent that you've always possessed?

Is it a concious effort on your part to inspire these emotions? Or is it just a byproduct of you expressing yourself?

I'd stake a large fortune on any copy you write being able to sell products faster than a starving man chasing after the ice cream truck. :hungry:
 

IceCreamKid

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Did you learn to write in such an electrifying, emotionally-rousing way? Or was it a talent that you've always possessed?

Is it a concious effort on your part to inspire these emotions? Or is it just a byproduct of you expressing yourself?

I don’t write at all using my brain. I just write whatever is in my heart at that given moment. I suspect this is why my writing has such an impact on some people; it comes from a different place than most. I don’t know if it’s a talent that I’ve always possessed because I never wrote anything until I started posting on this forum.

The older I get, the more I realize that my head acts as an obstacle to my heart and that my natural instincts know far more.

Here’s an example to illustrate what I mean:

How I Got My Products Into Retail Stores

Most people feel like they have to portray that they’re somebody else in order to create a successful biz. They get fancy biz cards, logos, make a website, buy a suit, and parade around as if they are someone of influence. That was me in college.

Bottom line, their OUTSIDE self is not aligned with their REAL self.

This lack of alignment actually develops fear and lack of confidence. It makes it hard to take sustained action because they are constantly playing the juggling act of being someone else. It's exhausting.

My products are finally being sold in stores now. Not big name stores just yet, but niche stores. Big name stores wouldn't give me a minute of their time lol. Here was my pitch when I approached the owners of the stores:

“Hi, my name is Ryan. I’ve been selling a lot of these on my own through phone and e-mail. I’ll be honest with you, I’ve never sold something in a retail location, I’m fairly new to this biz, but I want to make this a win-win for both of us. All I ask is that you just give me one shot. What would it take to get some of my products in your store?”. The last sentence opened up the door to negotiation and since I was absolutely 100% HONEST about who I was, the other party almost always would put their shields down and talk to me.

The truth will set you free. Taking action becomes resistance free when you know that all you have to do is portray your REAL self. Worry and doubt fade away while they are replaced by joy and confidence. Effortless action. Alignment. Inner peace.

I’m not saying that there won’t be obstacles. A master understands that the obstacles WILL come and just continues to work through them until the end. I’m just saying that taking action through those obstacles becomes easy when you’re rooted in your REAL self.

People are so damn shocked when you are raw and honest about who you really are, you’ll end up being able to get away with almost anything when you are grounded in truth.

Once you experience this shift inside your body, everything changes and it literally feels like a game. It becomes FUN instead of stressful.

Let love be your guiding light, not your attachment to money. Money is nothing more than a byproduct of the value you have given.
 
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RogueInnovation

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Most people feel like they have to portray that they’re somebody else in order to create a successful biz. They get fancy biz cards, logos, make a website, buy a suit, and parade around as if they are someone of influence.
This lack of alignment actually develops fear and lack of confidence. It makes it hard to take sustained action because they are constantly playing the juggling act of being someone else. It's exhausting.

Do you have more ideas on this?

I've been really struggling with this. The closest I have gotten is getting beat up while I face my fears and am honest about what I can do. I feel, much, much better, but I still feel a certain kind of sting and it is absolutely connected to this "portrayal".


I make sure to dress up when I do biz stuff (it helps because people assume you are there to do business, just like uniforms help show authority for security personel). I'm relaxed and nice in a genuine way to people, and I guess I even make people nervous (sometimes cashiers give me extra money by accident, or the boss comes over to help me personally).

But something still just isn't right, if you know what I mean? Its like, if I just be myself its synonomous with people wanting to shiv me. I feel like a moderate fighter in a bad neighborhood that makes up for it with that edge :p.

A poster here has been a saving grace, because as I talk to her, she reminds me by just being herself what strength is again (a woman of astounding integrity that truly needs a real break, yet troops on... its amazing). Which, has been slowly healing up big fat gash wounds that came from the audacity to be myself. That way I have all mercy kicked and stripped out of me by the sheer violence and volume of the fears people scream at the scapegoat.

Anyways, my point is, thats the portrayal you are talking about, and hell yes sign me up for getting rid of that however the heck possible.

I just need to understand, how in the darndest heeby jeebies I can stop making that portrayal and get outta that place, cuz its killing my love. I end up exhausted, conflicted, and only half alive after I get in these portrayal clashes.
I seem destined to just constantly be visciously kicked, and so I portray an image to make my bruises a little more blue rather than the black they would be.

You got anything you can expand on about this portrayal stuff that might turn on a light?

Cuz sign me up. I know that portrayal is a very very bad life raft (toxic even?).

I don't want money, just the strength to fight my way out. You know?
A way outta needing to be someone else because of their irrational fears.
Because how can you love people, when its always like that...
 
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Mike Kavanagh

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Bottom line, their OUTSIDE self is not aligned with their REAL self.
How do you define what your real self is?

For me, taking ownership of what I am really am, here is whats wrong.
I tend to eat out(fast food) a lot, I'm way overweight because of this. I don't dress up, basket ball shorts are my main attire. Don't try to date chicks even though I can be really social. People keep asking me why I don't date so and so.

I really just don't want to. I lack care.

The real me is completely unmotivated and over-educated. My analysis is my paralysis.

Do you have to change that person to be who you want to be?
Or is that person always there?

On the bright side, I don't have business cards or a personal website. lol
 

poro78

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Awesome thread, thanks a lot ICK!

...actually so awesome that today my wife kept asking what's wrong with me. I guess she's used to the normal, melancholic me. :D
 
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Every time I saw a picture of George Clooney and his wedding in the past week, I immediately thought of you, IceCreamKid. In fact, I was almost going to congratulate you on your marriage haha.
 

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Just finished this thread and I feel sad :(, I want more inspiration like this. Some great bits of wisdom here, its the rocket up my back side that i needed to take some action, thanks all..
 

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Since reading this thread a few weeks ago, I've been applying ICKs approach to my side businesses and everday travels. Even on the overcrowded Lexington Ave Subway line, its taught to be more observant. So I'll put down the phone, search for pain points, and think about solutions. On the business end, I'm accepting more returns/refunds which will hopefully translates into better feedback & reviews. A big thank you to ICK and all contributors for helping me refocus.
 
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Mark Foster II

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They're at peace with who they are and fully embrace the fact that the journey is what brings us happiness, not the destination. It's extremely difficult to describe this energy in words, but as each year passes I realize that this energy is at least equally important to strategy.

I love being around people who are moving towards their own definition of peace and inner truth. Everyone tries to tell you what's good for you. They don't want you to find your own answers because they want you to believe theirs.
I had an old neighbor of mine try and enforce his beliefs upon me last night as we were "catching up" which turned out to be him trying to push this MLM on me that he recently joined. Long story short, he was telling me how I NEEDED to focus more on the DESTINATION and not the JOURNEY and just from my little bit of time lurking on this forum and seeing this statement..........I knew his statement couldn't be further from the truth! Thanks for the reminder!
 

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I don’t write at all using my brain. I just write whatever is in my heart at that given moment. I suspect this is why my writing has such an impact on some people; it comes from a different place than most. I don’t know if it’s a talent that I’ve always possessed because I never wrote anything until I started posting on this forum.

The older I get, the more I realize that my head acts as an obstacle to my heart and that my natural instincts know far more.

Here’s an example to illustrate what I mean:

How I Got My Products Into Retail Stores

Most people feel like they have to portray that they’re somebody else in order to create a successful biz. They get fancy biz cards, logos, make a website, buy a suit, and parade around as if they are someone of influence. That was me in college.

Bottom line, their OUTSIDE self is not aligned with their REAL self.

This lack of alignment actually develops fear and lack of confidence. It makes it hard to take sustained action because they are constantly playing the juggling act of being someone else. It's exhausting.

My products are finally being sold in stores now. Not big name stores just yet, but niche stores. Big name stores wouldn't give me a minute of their time lol. Here was my pitch when I approached the owners of the stores:

“Hi, my name is Ryan. I’ve been selling a lot of these on my own through phone and e-mail. I’ll be honest with you, I’ve never sold something in a retail location, I’m fairly new to this biz, but I want to make this a win-win for both of us. All I ask is that you just give me one shot. What would it take to get some of my products in your store?”. The last sentence opened up the door to negotiation and since I was absolutely 100% HONEST about who I was, the other party almost always would put their shields down and talk to me.

The truth will set you free. Taking action becomes resistance free when you know that all you have to do is portray your REAL self. Worry and doubt fade away while they are replaced by joy and confidence. Effortless action. Alignment. Inner peace.

I’m not saying that there won’t be obstacles. A master understands that the obstacles WILL come and just continues to work through them until the end. I’m just saying that taking action through those obstacles becomes easy when you’re rooted in your REAL self.

People are so damn shocked when you are raw and honest about who you really are, you’ll end up being able to get away with almost anything when you are grounded in truth.

Once you experience this shift inside your body, everything changes and it literally feels like a game. It becomes FUN instead of stressful.

Let love be your guiding light, not your attachment to money. Money is nothing more than a byproduct of the value you have given.

when I sell life insurance I show up with my material and whatever it is I am going to wear to my day job. cargos and a tee shirt. I am often selling to people MUCH older than me who have seen plenty of dudes in monkey suits trying to raise that premium like an auctioneer and skew the old people or the business man they are lucky enough to see. I was taught to lie about having a busy schedule. Lie??? thats already a bad start...now that I am on my own You need me? I am there. I answer on the first ring. when asked why I don't wear a suit and tie....I say A) Dallas is hot B) I sell insurance....not suits. So I have totally flipped insurance in a customer service aspect...no....I am not too good to answer your call....and I ain't gonna lie that I am more busy than I am. I am gonna break this policy down to layman terms and simplify how your family gets paid if you die. I will tell you of the riders you can have and if one is of interest I will apply it. If you cannot afford it I will actively search for a better rate. If it is still not what you need then I am of no use to you. No one knows what I know about insurance...so it is much easier to be seen as an educator first than fitting the cookie cutter mold of the 30 salesmen before me.


I have said if for many years. If you had to cut your arm off....would you rather a sharp knife or a dull one? Brutal honesty is the best way to make friends. Sugar coating is a very good way to go bankrupt.
 

RogueInnovation

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Just finished this thread and I feel sad :(, I want more inspiration like this.

Just hearing it once is more than enough to change your perspective forever.
ICK shared something so important and with such passion that the change it catalyses in you can remain in your psyche forever.
Just remember the power of generosity and you'll find more lessons in your life.
 
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Mike Kavanagh

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I see a lot of these people who finish this thread sad.

Why? Ask yourself why.

If anything, just the content of this thread should make you happy. There is hope to get out of the situation your in. There is hope for a better life.

You can change. Your current socioeconomic placement does not determine your ceiling. You parents place in society does not tell you what you have to do. Nor does your education equal your net-worth.

If you have access to this thread, I guarantee you, you have a greater tool set than more than two-thirds of the world.
You also have better tool sets than anyone ever alive to this day.

If you are sad, ask yourself why. Life is great. Helping others is great.

To end this with a quote, a totally cliche quote, but the whole quote;

"And so, my fellow Americans: ask not what your country can do for you — ask what you can do for your country.

My fellow citizens of the world: ask not what America will do for you, but what together we can do for the freedom of man."
-JFK
 

Bigguns50

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I just write whatever is in my heart at that given moment.
I've been trying to do more of this. It's challenging for me and I think there are two reasons. 1) I feel more vulnerable opening up. 2) I fear that I'll be judged in a negative way...even though pretty much everything else I do in my life I don't care much what people think. :confused:

Lie??? thats already a bad start...
I worked 3.5 yrs for a office furniture company. We sold new/refurbished systems(cubicles). The 1st week I learned I sometimes 'had' to lie to customers. ie. The owner was always over his credit limit with manufacturers and I could order something for a customer, but it wouldn't be released until the owner paid down his debt...of course I couldn't tell the customer this. This went against my moral compass and I didn't lie....I just asked what manufacturers I could offer customers any given week.

I did well there but the whole system was build around lies and deception...the owner's way. I went out with him on some of his jobs and witnessed him lying to the customer's face. Crazy thing...he was so good he always got away with it. He was proud !

When I started bucking they system, I took some heat. I was responsible for the most general voice messages to us "Associates"(12 of us) pertaining to following the rules, and what NOT to do or say to a customer. He gave me a LOT of movement because I made him a lot of money.... eventually I was fired.

Some years later, the owner went bankrupt and divorced his Wife w/2 young children.
 

Jamesdoesmith

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I've been trying to do more of this. It's challenging for me and I think there are two reasons. 1) I feel more vulnerable opening up. 2) I fear that I'll be judged in a negative way...even though pretty much everything else I do in my life I don't care much what people think. :confused:


I worked 3.5 yrs for a office furniture company. We sold new/refurbished systems(cubicles). The 1st week I learned I sometimes 'had' to lie to customers. ie. The owner was always over his credit limit with manufacturers and I could order something for a customer, but it wouldn't be released until the owner paid down his debt...of course I couldn't tell the customer this. This went against my moral compass and I didn't lie....I just asked what manufacturers I could offer customers any given week.

I did well there but the whole system was build around lies and deception...the owner's way. I went out with him on some of his jobs and witnessed him lying to the customer's face. Crazy thing...he was so good he always got away with it. He was proud !

When I started bucking they system, I took some heat. I was responsible for the most general voice messages to us "Associates"(12 of us) pertaining to following the rules, and what NOT to do or say to a customer. He gave me a LOT of movement because I made him a lot of money.... eventually I was fired.

Some years later, the owner went bankrupt and divorced his Wife w/2 young children.


my lie was I had to appear as a proffessional and lie and say my schedule was very full of appointments and when I wasn't doing that I was on vacation....

I flipped it and I am now so avalible day or night that I have gotten more refferal based business than I ever would had I appeared "too busy".... so many people get into sales to be better...I am just like the people I sell too. Just tryin to pay the bills y'all. I don't want to appear unassuming or without ill intention...I just want to BE honest. no smoke and mirrors
 
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smarty

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Just finished this thread and I feel sad :(, I want more inspiration like this. Some great bits of wisdom here, its the rocket up my back side that i needed to take some action, thanks all..

I can only add this, which I believe is the most important ingredient to a happier life and limitless wealth and is just a shorter sentence to convey what this thread is all about:

Learn to live by giving value!

Give value because you can, not because you want a certain response or because of what you can do.
Love people FIRST, before wanting love and attention back.
A kid loves people FIRST. He naturally gives value because he has intrinsic value, not because he is big!

Create value in the world. Become a value creator.
Create value by writing a book (authors).
Create value by writing software that helps people do a task easier (programmers).
Create value by entertaining (singers, actors, comedian).
Create value by doing your work as perfect as you possibly can (if you work for someone else).
Create value by communicating openly.
Create value by smiling to people you meet, giving a positive vibe and expecting the best out of any situation (especially if you have any sort of anxiety, social anxiety etc).
Create value by becoming the man of your word. Never delay things that you said you would do.
Create value by realizing that reality is subjective and whatever your past story is, it is irrelevant right now. Nobody else cares about it except you. Stop holding back to your past story. Let it go and take full responsibility.
Create value by helping people in this forum if you can.
Create value by not trying to change people, but be the first to give them a hand if need be.

Thanks to @IceCreamKid , @Vigilante , @MJ DeMarco and many other people here for this awesome community. It may be just a start for me, but once I realized the importance of value giving, I see no limits of what is possible. I'm born again.
 

leonbenj

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Who else is struggling with setting whats most important?

... which then affects dedicating time on things that are minor. And then realize way later that you completely forgot about the bigger picture. I constantly feel like the more I work on getting organized, the more I get lost because of all the categories I create.

Anyone have any input on this topic?

I thank everyone who contributed in this thread, such good minds here. thank you.
 

Jamesdoesmith

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@leonbenj When that happens to me I like to completely turn everything off. Go back in time to your old self...remember why you started. What you truly wanted. Look at how far you have come. Go do something completely unrelated to whatever it is you are working on. catch a football game. Go downtown and people watch. Most of all remember why you started. Remember the thing that got you to read the book and brought you to this site.
 
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timmy

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The information here on this thread is classic in content value, not new but classic non the less. From the cradle we are bombarded with crazy sales systems and imagery on marketing. They are head games at best and can border on deception. Thanks ICK and All here for your input. I suppose all we have to do really is make a connection with our customers one at a time without the BS and smoke screens. Failing this......A true story.........One friend of mine Gerry could not get his niche food product into the major chain stores. Over a six week period he hatched a cunning but brilliant tactic. He would target the biggest chain store here in Ireland. He with family members, friends and anyone else willing it seems (lol) went to its customer services counters up and down the country simultaneously at this major chain store. These folk would complain that the product seemed to be sold out and politely ask when they would be getting more in. Within two minutes the manager would show up all smiles to tell you they don't stock this product. THEN the manager was told " OH sorry it must have been at another store or at a compeditors store" . Within 24 hrs HQ got numerous queries on this product availability. Conveniently Gerry would resend a previously sent e mail to the group buyers office. Gerry was stocking in that multiple store within a week and set traction for the compeditors to follow within a month. The crazy thing is that they probably knew it was staged but did not have the time or patience to investigate it a little deeper. It rings back into ICK speaking the heart to his customers "give me once chance " it will give you a foot in the door but nothing else .
 

joocenasty

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I don’t write at all using my brain. I just write whatever is in my heart at that given moment. I suspect this is why my writing has such an impact on some people; it comes from a different place than most. I don’t know if it’s a talent that I’ve always possessed because I never wrote anything until I started posting on this forum.

The older I get, the more I realize that my head acts as an obstacle to my heart and that my natural instincts know far more.

Here’s an example to illustrate what I mean:

How I Got My Products Into Retail Stores

Most people feel like they have to portray that they’re somebody else in order to create a successful biz. They get fancy biz cards, logos, make a website, buy a suit, and parade around as if they are someone of influence. That was me in college.

Bottom line, their OUTSIDE self is not aligned with their REAL self.

This lack of alignment actually develops fear and lack of confidence. It makes it hard to take sustained action because they are constantly playing the juggling act of being someone else. It's exhausting.

My products are finally being sold in stores now. Not big name stores just yet, but niche stores. Big name stores wouldn't give me a minute of their time lol. Here was my pitch when I approached the owners of the stores:

“Hi, my name is Ryan. I’ve been selling a lot of these on my own through phone and e-mail. I’ll be honest with you, I’ve never sold something in a retail location, I’m fairly new to this biz, but I want to make this a win-win for both of us. All I ask is that you just give me one shot. What would it take to get some of my products in your store?”. The last sentence opened up the door to negotiation and since I was absolutely 100% HONEST about who I was, the other party almost always would put their shields down and talk to me.

The truth will set you free. Taking action becomes resistance free when you know that all you have to do is portray your REAL self. Worry and doubt fade away while they are replaced by joy and confidence. Effortless action. Alignment. Inner peace.

I’m not saying that there won’t be obstacles. A master understands that the obstacles WILL come and just continues to work through them until the end. I’m just saying that taking action through those obstacles becomes easy when you’re rooted in your REAL self.

People are so damn shocked when you are raw and honest about who you really are, you’ll end up being able to get away with almost anything when you are grounded in truth.

Once you experience this shift inside your body, everything changes and it literally feels like a game. It becomes FUN instead of stressful.

Let love be your guiding light, not your attachment to money. Money is nothing more than a byproduct of the value you have given.

wow thats pretty insightful, incredible post.
 

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