Random Rant #1: Never Argue with a Slow Laner

[James Fake]

Ugh.. issed:

I just had to let this out, it may be in the wrong section. But basically... Never try to argue with someone who thinks "Rich people are all unhappy", "Money doesn't buy happiness", or overall "Slow-Laners".

Reasons:
1) You will never win. They are already brainwashed from childhood, so it is HIGHLY unlikely you will change their state of mind. :smx4:

2) Attempts to get them to see your point of view is a waste of time and energy as well. :smx4:

3) "Money doesn't buy you happiness" = crap. The word happiness is defined by every single person differently. Happiness to some means relationships, to some means material things, to some means the ability to act without limits, to some means helping your family's life easier, etc. So to say "money doesn't buy you happiness" would be an ignorant statement because you are simply and only applying that happiness to everyone means relationships and nothing else. So if money doesn't buy you any kind of happiness, and I offer you free $100,000. You should turn it down. I mean WHY and what reasons would you have to take it if money doesn't buy you happienss.

4) "All rich people are unhappy" = crap. Yes, there are rich people that are unhappy, but there are unhappy people in all economic classes. I hate brainwashed people who watch TV and see celebrities life crashes and assume every rich person has no social skills, lonely, and unhappy. That is so not true. Alot of rich people acquire their wealth by hard work (entrepreneurs, etc.) and are very well rounded people. They are rich because it is a result of using their skills and finding a fast lane way to make it work for lots of people. So proportionately, there is the same percentage of unhappy people in the high class as there would be in middle class. There are different problems that affect happiness in each class, but the problem that arise from having loads of money isn't nearly as big of a problem to someone trying to satisfy their most basic needs of shelter, food, and sex. :banana:

Sorry, just had to rant because you will never win. It just gives you high blood pressure from thinking that you are trying to help them, but ignorantly they stand their ground. But when behind closed doors, complain about no vacations, complain about living paycheck to paycheck, complain about wishing to have more money, or talk about "what I would do if I won the lottery". LOL..

Thanks for reading,
James F

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

Who cares what they think. Misery loves company and that misery loves to draw you down to their level. The best revenge is living well.

Sorry, just had to rant because you will never win. It just gives you high blood pressure from thinking that you are trying to help them, but ignorantly they stand their ground. But when behind closed doors, complain about no vacations, complain about living paycheck to paycheck, complain about wishing to have more money, or talk about "what I would do if I won the lottery". LOL..

Actually, in my book these people are called "Sidewalkers" and are a step below Slowlaners. Slowlaners actually have a plan (jobs, invest, frugality, 401Ks) whereas Sidewalkers have no plan except hope ... hope they win the lottery, hope they win a big lawsuit, hope rich uncle dies ...

Speed+ for the post.

 

[andviv]

and that is why we don't discuss religion and politics here. They are also based on beliefs and there is no way to change your point of view, and you won't change mine, so there is no positive outcome.

Also, think of it from the other perspective... that person must be thinking "how come JamesF can't see that money brings unhappiness to people???"

 

[jportz]

Ugh.. issed:

3) "Money doesn't buy you happiness" = crap.

4) "All rich people are unhappy" = crap.

James F

I agree with you 100%!

I believe there are a lot of intelligent professionals (even middle/upper class) who refuse to change their thinking, not because they can logically argue a case against you, but because of the fear of unhappiness.

An abstract artist, who suddenly realises 3 weeks into a painting that they hate their intial compostion, will likely reason "I've put in too much work for it to be wrong at this stage" and slog it out to the bitter end - even if it takes 6 months to finish. (Think on a small scale when you might have done this?)

Everyone misses some oppotunities, large or small, as a result of fear of dissappointment. If the dissappointment is the realisation that "Oh crap! I've wasted the most capable years of my life in meaningless 40+hr weeks!" its easier to subconciously convince yourself you're doing the right thing and condemn those who try and tell you otherwise.

 

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[hatterasguy]

I don't talk about money with people who are not like minded. Gave up years ago, I have better things to do with my time.

 

[madison]

I am always amused by the number of people at work who buy lottery tickets every week, hoping to win big. They are stuck on the idea that it's the only way they could ever become rich - and because they are stuck with that way of thinking, they don't believe or consider that there are other ways.

 

[365]

I dont entirely agree with "Money doesnt buy you happiness = crap".
Yes, to have money is a great thing and it will certainly make you happy on some occasions. It will also give you freedom in many ways. But I dont think you should fool yourself with something like "a lot of money will automatically make me happy". Being alone, sick and old, no money in the world will buy you happiness. Keep the balance and some self-irony on your quest to making money.

 

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[NoMoneyDown]

I can relate. I had a coworker who I tried several times to "epiphamize". IOW, seeing how with a plan, hard work, persistence, blah, blah, blah, he too could be rich, instead of just dreaming about it. I only had a few talks about it with him, but each time I'd notice he would always have something negative to say ... you know, like "that won't work", "that will take a lot of money", "tenants will only trash your house", "you'll have 10x more stress than you do now", and so on. He was laid off several years ago, and I lost touch with him. I got an email from him a couple of months ago asking how things were going (not with my plan for financial independence, but the normal small talk). I responded "fine, etc". and then asked him if he was still interested in becoming financially wealthy. His response? "So, are you a millionaire yet?" It dawned on me before that he (and people like him) just cannot be "converted" as they are too solidified in their beliefs about financial independence (mainly, it's for "other" people besides them). However, his response was the proverbial nail in the coffin, and the reason why I don't even talk about my endeavors with others too much (unless I know beforehand that they are TRULY driven).

Edit: BTW, I read a book many years ago by Charles Givens (who I like to think as a pre-Robert Kiyosaki in a different way). In the book, he referred to many of these types as "dumpers" - people who like to seek out other people to dump their negativity on. He said to avoid these people like the plague as they do two things (1) waste YOUR time by talking to you about THEIR negative lives, and (2) bombard you with negative thoughts, which over time, erodes your own positive drive.

 

[Talkintoy]

Actually, in my book these people are called "Sidewalkers" and are a step below Slowlaners. Slowlaners actually have a plan (jobs, invest, frugality, 401Ks) whereas Sidewalkers have no plan except hope ... hope they win the lottery, hope they win a big lawsuit, hope rich uncle dies ...

Hey i made a graph about this and mentioned in the graph "whatever comes" type of people. Hope i can post the graph just like the "Why" direction i made awhile back. I call the new graph 5 year glimpse and its written in my board in my office. :smug2:

 

[Talkintoy]

I am always amused by the number of people at work who buy lottery tickets every week, hoping to win big. They are stuck on the idea that it's the only way they could ever become rich - and because they are stuck with that way of thinking, they don't believe or consider that there are other ways.

Well this is no difference than things provided to them already and all they have to do is buy it with their hard earned money for nothing and take chance just like casinos. Giving someone hope sells. Problem is the outcome of this type of hope deosn't work unless your meant to win? Now who believes in this depends on your religion and belief the way you were taught and grew up.

People don't like to think to be a creator, coz it's much easier to be just a follower just like the school taught most people.

 

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[Talkintoy]

I dont entirely agree with "Money doesnt buy you happiness = crap".
Yes, to have money is a great thing and it will certainly make you happy on some occasions. It will also give you freedom in many ways. But I dont think you should fool yourself with something like "a lot of money will automatically make me happy". Being alone, sick and old, no money in the world will buy you happiness. Keep the balance and some self-irony on your quest to making money.

I've heard this so many times to people i argue with about money. It is somewhat true depending on how you look at it, that "money does not buy you happiness". What it buys you is memories. I think memories to look back that you did this, you did that is far more powerful than money = happiness. I like to look at it this way money buys memories x happiness = priceless.

 

[James Fake]

@MJ - thanks

@Hatterasguy - it's so hard because often times it's your loved ones that have this way of thinking too, and you are trying to help. I realized this 'money truly rules the world' mentality about a year before I graduated and I always tell my friends & family to always think big and 'cant' isnt in your vocab. Some people just aren't made with this drive..

@365 - 'happiness' is pretty much chasing a time travel machine. Is it even possible to attain? Does it even exist? Happiness = what? Can't you be happy one minute and an hour not. Doesn't having family that loves you make you happy? But after you get used to the constant love, you often take it for granted til someone passes away? Can you be 100% happy, is it even a level you can reach? Or is it purely a temporary emotion?

Question to those who think happiness is defined by relationships with loved ones: if you had money to where you didn't have to work. Wouldn't you spend more time and focus on having quality time with your loved ones? Wouldn't that make you more happy so in a sense, so money buys happiness?

(40 hour work week + 10 hours (5 days x 2 hours to get ready and commute time) = 50 hours out of the available 112 hours a week is gone (assuming you get 8 hours of sleep a day and work absolutely no overtime)

@talkintoy - that's a nice equation. There are studies of money as it relates to happiness. Money couldn't be scientifically proven to increase or decrease happiness levels, but it is proven to give freedom, ability to buy memory, and ability to have experiences to those with money limits will never experience, and of course, more time available to pursue the things you love to do.

 

[David]

Money has value to only an extent of its user. Everyone is different, money could be a sense of freedom, while some find it a route of evil. Money is money, and the end of the day its just printed pieces of paper, which has been added value.

 

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[hatterasguy]

I don't associate with many "slow laners" as they are called here. Most of the people I know are in business for themselves and make good money doing it. As they say your friends reflect on you.

I guess I am lucky, my family loves real estate. Never had a problem getting support or money for my ventures.