How you know you are no longer fit to counsel side walkers anymore.

[Mattie]

Although social media can be useful for some things in business, let me tell you today I've learned moderators are stupid and don't know the difference between abuse and victim hood. I was blamed for victim blaming because a person was kicked out of their house, and explained a parents perspective of why they would do such a thing. And said even three times doesn't make it right. lol Now fortunately, I was warned because I was stating it wasn't abuse to be kicked out of your house and not having a job.

Parents don't have a right to discipline there children because it's abuse. Okay! That makes sense. And when there are actual bullies and suicidal comments, umm...this is okay and appropriate.

I know this is really teaching people to play "Victim" When you're telling someone for making a statement of take responsibility for the part you play, they're victim blaming. Please whine to the moderator why you feel victimized by me for saying you're responsible for having a job and supporting yourself.

I've been running into this to much lately, and it's quite annoying. I have empathy and understanding, but I know very well babying and saying it will be alright, doesn't change behavior.

I suppose I've just outgrown certain people, because they are to sensitive and misinterpret what you say, or read more into it than what you stated. Hmm...and that's probably the line that got me in trouble.

I'm not responsible for how you interpret what I say. lol

I suppose that is what they considered victim blaming. I made them my victim and blamed them for misinterpreting. My best move...leave particular groups that support playing the victim.

 

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[SBS.95]

My best move...leave particular groups that support playing the victim.

Best thing to do. I'm off Facebook (haven't logged in since 2013). Any friends/family I actually care to talk to are in my cell phone contacts. I don't have a Twitter account, and wtf is Instagram/Snapchat/Vine. I try to avoid Reddit, and when on there stick to the specific subreddits of my interests (/r/cars, /r/entrepreneur, etc.) Any of the primary subreddits are full of victim-players who feel sorry for themselves working a $9/hour retail job with their social justice degree.

Most people could do with a good shake up in their lives. Getting kicked out of the house may just be the wakeup call that person looks back on and feels thankful for. Or... y'know, they could spend the next 10 years complaining about how all of their problems stem from this one setback, and it is everyone's fault but their own.

 

[Mattie]

Thank you Boxster, It was on Reddit. I don't say to much to begin with on there, but I usually just answer a few questions a month just for the purpose of linking my e-books on Reddit. They have that rule you have to participate. lol So I probably answer four questions a month or may be a few more for that purpose only. Yes, I agree it's a breeding ground for victim hood, and the sub moderator warned me, and probably seen I was qualified to answer, so didn't ban me, and have linked books since last October. I get a lot of reads from their depending on what book it is, so that's why I'm on there.

Facebook for the same reason, but actually left some groups on there for the same reason. Although, I get people wanting to follow me at the same time that do jive with what I say, and end up buying books. So, I kind of bare with it, but I don't spend all day on there, because I have a lot more to learning about writing fiction/novel/screen writing. I do use it for selling books in the writer groups too, so it's about building a fan base, although I really don't interact to often. And really eventually will set up something like this and forum on my own website, which I'm working on still for author platform.

I think I just see it as a temporary thing to gain the fan base and switch, which also gives me another way to build and email list. Still trying to figure out this stuff, but eventually I'm sure I can get off both eventually except for posting a few things a months at a later point.

Most people could do with a good shake up in their lives. Getting kicked out of the house may just be the wakeup call that person looks back on and feels thankful for. Or... y'know, they could spend the next 10 years complaining about how all of their problems stem from this one setback, and it is everyone's fault but their own.

This is usually my exact point. And people taking responsibility for the choices they are making. I stand my ground with people, but they don't like hearing what I have to say, because of course they want to hear what they want too and play victim and do exactly what you stated.

The one's that are ready to make those changes usually do contact me and come back so, I don't really chase them down or anything. I think it just irritates me when moderators don't know what the heck they're doing in the first place and play into the victim mentality and baby them. I think I go into these groups to see what's not working, and try to avoid those mistakes when I make my own group or forum for business purposes. What the problems are, and what kind of idiots you have to deal with, and fortunately, most of these groups or crap and don't steer people in the right direction. So, really they won't like my group or forum, because they'd basically have to take responsibility and I stop playing victim and start learning something useful that is productive besides socializing with lazy people, complaining about their problems, and actually do something about it.

These groups aren't much of challenge for me anymore. It's to easy, and at a higher level, that's for sure.

 

[Jesse Dallenbach]

Best thing to do. I'm off Facebook (haven't logged in since 2013). Any friends/family I actually care to talk to are in my cell phone contacts. I don't have a Twitter account, and wtf is Instagram/Snapchat/Vine. I try to avoid Reddit, and when on there stick to the specific subreddits of my interests (/r/cars, /r/entrepreneur, etc.) Any of the primary subreddits are full of victim-players who feel sorry for themselves working a $9/hour retail job with their social justice degree.

Most people could do with a good shake up in their lives. Getting kicked out of the house may just be the wakeup call that person looks back on and feels thankful for. Or... y'know, they could spend the next 10 years complaining about how all of their problems stem from this one setback, and it is everyone's fault but their own.

Yup I have been off Facebook since Jan 2013--anyone I wanna talk to to or wants to talk to me we have each others phone #. Don't go on Reddit anymore because really there was no value in it.

i go on twitter and you tube still but don't spend much time just go to useful links and or watch useful vids.

This forum is the closet thing to internet interaction that i do and it has not even been 2 months yet.

Now I jut focus on the moment, no past, no future just present...it's a work in progress.

- Jesse

 

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[Digamma]

What you do is read high voted comments and rehash the same sad ideas. You go with the flow.
You say what they want to hear so you can promote your stuff.

Be rich, not right. Average people are pitiful and always will be. It's just how it is.

 

[Mattie]

What you do is read high voted comments and rehash the same sad ideas. You go with the flow.
You say what they want to hear so you can promote your stuff.

Be rich, not right. Average people are pitiful and always will be. It's just how it is.

Thank you. I will keep that in mind. And really it just gave me another idea for another non-fiction book on victimology, victim mentality, personal responsibility, the blame game. I suppose I can turn it around like that and use it for leverage. For some reason I like to point these things out to people, because as I just seen there is a book
http://www.amazon.com/dp/0312098820/?tag=tff-amazonparser-20

Sounds fun to me, to spell out. What's the difference? I think people have things confused.

 

[Jesse Dallenbach]

Best thing to do. I'm off Facebook (haven't logged in since 2013). Any friends/family I actually care to talk to are in my cell phone contacts. I don't have a Twitter account, and wtf is Instagram/Snapchat/Vine. I try to avoid Reddit, and when on there stick to the specific subreddits of my interests (/r/cars, /r/entrepreneur, etc.) Any of the primary subreddits are full of victim-players who feel sorry for themselves working a $9/hour retail job with their social justice degree.

Most people could do with a good shake up in their lives. Getting kicked out of the house may just be the wakeup call that person looks back on and feels thankful for. Or... y'know, they could spend the next 10 years complaining about how all of their problems stem from this one setback, and it is everyone's fault but their own.

Yup I have been off Facebook since Jan 2013--anyone I wanna talk to to or wants to talk to me we have each others phone #. Don't go on Reddit anymore because really there was no value in it.

i go on twitter and you tube still but don't spend much time just go to useful links and or watch useful vids.

This forum is the closet thing to internet interaction that i do and it has not even been 2 months yet.

Now I jut focus on the moment, no past, no future just present...it's a work in progress.

- Jesse

What you do is read high voted comments and rehash the same sad ideas. You go with the flow.
You say what they want to hear so you can promote your stuff.

Be rich, not right. Average people are pitiful and always will be. It's just how it is.

"Average people are pitiful and always will be."

I DO NOT AGREE WITH THAT STATEMENT AT ALL BECAUSE IT IS NOT RIGHT.

We are all one, we are all the experiencing this world together and to call one group average (what is is average anyway and are when were you awarded this job of determining who was average?) and then to label them "pitiful" no sir JUST NO.

What good or value does it serve to call someone or a group average or pitiful? Instead of doing that help them, many probably wont take it (the theme of this thread) but you can still try and if your words fall o n deaf ears then do what you should always do FOCUS ON YOURSELF and THE MOMENT.

- Jesse

 

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[LynnD5000]

In MJ's book while his mom didn't boot him out of the house - she did mention getting a job a few times...

It's a matter of response - A Crisis - always, always - generates a response - when I was in the military there were alot of lessons from boot camp that were taught that way -

How the kid reacts to the crisis will determine his future - If Mom & Dad are like most, they will eventually relent and let the kid back home -
Robert Kyasaki chose to live at home while he got started on his empire -

It's a matter of attitude - If the kid whines on facebook & reddit and others - he will likely not reach the altitude of MJ or Robert -
If he dusts himself off and at least makes a stab at it - he may figure it out.

I have 5 son's and didn't have to kick them out - but my wife taught them to be self reliant from a very young age -

It kind of follows MJ's outsourcing - don't outsource raising your kid's - (no Childcare) - or someone else will instill the ethics they have when they grow up - and I am sure I will get crucified for saying that - because that is the way the slow lane has been taught to operate - follow the group -

If you live in the fast lane you are HOME to raise your kids! The family unit is the center of peace and happiness -

If you have an opinion that isn't the slowlane norm you will always be a victim basher - it is what it is....

 

[hellolin]

What you do is read high voted comments and rehash the same sad ideas. You go with the flow.
You say what they want to hear so you can promote your stuff.

Be rich, not right. Average people are pitiful and always will be. It's just how it is.

If the average people are not always pitful, then fastlaners will have a much harder time making their dues.

 

[Digamma]

We are all one, we are all the experiencing this world together and to call one group average (what is is average anyway and are when were you awarded this job of determining who was average?) and then to label them "pitiful" no sir JUST NO.

It was not a value statement. As for average, it literally means average. So I guess I was awarded this power by statistics?

What good or value does it serve to call someone or a group average or pitiful? Instead of doing that help them, many probably wont take it (the theme of this thread) but you can still try and if your words fall o n deaf ears then do what you should always do FOCUS ON YOURSELF and THE MOMENT.

You can't help people with words. The average person has a giant ego, no emotional control, no ability to see him/herself critically, and no self discipline. I say this, mind you, without any rage at all - it's merely a fact, sad as it is.
Everything I do is to help people - but that can't make me blind to things I see.

 

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[Jesse Dallenbach]

It was not a value statement. As for average, it literally means average. So I guess I was awarded this power by statistics?
You can't help people with words. The average person has a giant ego, no emotional control, no ability to see him/herself critically, and no self discipline. I say this, mind you, without any rage at all - it's merely a fact, sad as it is.
Everything I do is to help people - but that can't make me blind to things I see.

You can't help people with words? I feel you can, all people probably no, but you can help many with words--fairly certain that MJ DeMarco's book helped a lot of people and that consisted of his words.

I am glad that everything you do is to help people--but calling people pitiful offers very little value IMO.

Most all people, let alone average people, have giant egos so I don't quite understand your thoughts on that.

The goal here on this forum is to provide VALUE to others through various means--calling one pitiful (some people actaulyl do respond to that and in fact need that sort of nudge) usually is not providing value to them.

Just my thoughts but you keep on keeping on ;-)

- Jesse