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Have You Suffered From Mental Health

  • Yes

    Votes: 2 50.0%
  • No

    Votes: 2 50.0%
  • Not Sure

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    4

RB96

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Mar 10, 2017
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Hi everyone, I have been a member of the forum for over a year and still not posted just lurked...

Sorry :( for what its worth anyway

I am going to be as honest as possible but to be honest I dont feel 100% comfortable in sharing my name, profession and stuff at this early stage

Today I have decided to post and to be honest I am dodging what I need to do (sales call's to get my Biz up and running as its been over 2 months coming on 3 after delays that i have done to it myself when it should and was ready enough to launched back in Dec2017/Jan 2018)

I have been online and have been doing anything from surfing deals ( you know what i have just bought a TV - world cup deal, I dont need one its just that its an old plasma expensive to run and not 4k the new one is and cheaper to run (so long term saving when though about it that way...hmmm wants vs needs eeek wifes not going to be too happy - instant gratification) surfing Porn (Instant Gratification - I really do think I have a addiction to porn, now that I think about it further I have spent days just watch, tug, watch tug :'( and before you know it I am like where the day gone, wheres the week gone - I end up looking at Vids about No Fap challenge - action faking - but then low and behold start again) anyway I divulge

The Journey to The Millionaire Fastlane book started back in July2015 after a huge argument with my wife , over believe it or not! what to watch the film in question being Hot Pursuit!!! lets just say don't bother lol, anyway the argument had accumulated from hundreds of little things but that was the tipping point and then through looking for help as I was like enough's a enough, I rediscovered Tony Robbins ( I first discovered him when I went through the PUA scene after being recommended the Game by Neil Strauss where I had collated as much info and been on the forums yet I took NO ACTION!!! but atleast the Mind Game stuff was rediscovered though when i first got it, had i listened to the stuff damn ..what could have been lol)

Man when I first realized Tonys lessons or what he demonstrates/ teaches (NLP etc) I was blown away and it did literally change me overnight esp my relationship with my wife and inlaws (though some of it has regressed to old ways, alot has stood the test of time) and how I lived in the "Victim" label etc I then went on a rampage of hoarding as much of his stuff as possible of his from audio to books, I still do to this day listen every so often, though If i am honest it is action faking as it makes me feel better though i dont really get any closer to my goals)

To this day nearly 3 years on I have yet to actually follow through on any of his programs, I started PP2 in Feb2016 but stopped on like day 7 or something ( i was on a holiday and it was taxing my mind alot...I am a huge overthinker and have been for years) I still have been meaning to get around to it, but it never happens

I first "read" or should I say listened to this Book around December 2016/January 2017

I had quit my Job earlier in June 2016 after being fed up of it and to be honest the fear of settling, also lol the main reason really was running from inspection... long story but in short

(From reading this and MJ recommendation ie Mindset by Carol Dweck
I have realized that I have had a fixed mindset , though thought it was a growth one due to being "self actualized" but from being told I was special from a very young age and having won academic accolade through the years...I know I go out of my way to preserve it and not really push and grow from being outside my comfort zone)

I like short cuts and will not stop at anything to keep up appearances of being intelligent, including not doing a certain accreditation but initially not doing it as was going to do it later, and was rushed by the bosses, but soon found that i could get away with it and kept on the facade for years... to this day I have "got away with it" but the fear of getting caught was too much and I quit instead of just doing the accreditation through fear of failing it and i just couldn't be bothered to do the work involved as i did it day in day out anyway but knowing my luck I'd fail it. I was also getting to the point that I could no longer bare the thought of ground hog day and then retire then die!

Anyway again I am talking about ME and I am very Me centric I suppose the more I type this the more I am talking about is me (its abit therapeutic to be honest) though like to come across as selfless and giving. hmmmm

I have realized upon self reflection I have never really finished anything I have started for me from video games from back in 1998 yes 1998 and to this day I have console games I always wanted to finish and never got around to it but dang I would have to buy the latest games etc until i finally broke free of collecting console have literally all of them till the PS3 - like my retro consoles as I was not allowed a console at all, infact my first ever proper console was a used psx/1 i bought myself after saving for ages, anyway back to the games I would get as its shibey new and well reviewed just to add to my pile of unfinished or to get around to finishing one day list

I used to start calling myself "the collector" and have 1000's of hours of unwatched anime, unplayed games, unread comics and books, unheard albums and tracks etc

Infact just typing this stuff out has helped me realised that i am switching one thing to another in a phase through out my life starting with gaming then anime then music and now entrepreneurship
Oh and getting fit from being fat (comfort eater - well thats the excuse anyway) I have been getting in shape fro well for 2 decades - ive bought the gym equipment even now its just clothes horses, even though i swear that everytime it will be different, that i have done my research "learnt the secrets" formulated the plan...but all that means F all without ACTION

Errr sound like what i am doing now...Entrepreneur or Wantrepreneur HMMMMM

I am Indeed the Idea Guy that MJ speaks of in Unscripted ( A book I waited upon with baited breath for the audio version, and listened to as soon as i could)

OMG what am I doing

Its LIKE my whole LIFE I have been PREPARING FOR GREATNESS !!!

Be it researching, collating, listening, reading etc
The greatness that was "promised" from following Scripted dogma and being a teachers pet (straight A student) to listening to my parents, well trying to please my Father (someone I used to blame for a lot of things whilst living in the victim mindset, though I know better now, I chose to listen to him for I am both responsible and accountable) to doing a profession to getting a good job etc etc basically Model Citizen

- ALL ACTION FAKING...I know this YET I still do action faking

ACTION FAKING IS WHAT HAS LEAD ME TO THIS MOMENT!

I really dont know where I am going with this thread apart from a circle jerk of self pity D'OH

Though people say that I am too hard on myself but they dont know what i know and you now if you made it this far!

I Am a SEASONED WELL VERSED ACTION FAKER and Have been trying to break free since learning what I am predisposed to, I dont want to LABEL myself it as its becomes your identity but lets be brutal honest up until this point I have been

Not to mention my mental health issues with a everlong battle with depression since literally as long as i remember, with a few suicidal thoughts though i am too chicken to ever do it, just the thoughts come and go

Then I look to my Past and turn into a "Time Loser" where has the last decade gone...in 2008 I had this idea, its now worth this much, In 2008 I was going to do this etc etc

Where has the last decade, year, month, week and infact Today gone at that matter as I sit in my pants whilst typing away as its hot and I just took off my chinos...instead of wearing shorts like a civilized individual.

Oh and did I mention i am a Father.....yeh what this guys a Father
you read that right boys and girls , I love him my son is now nearly 15 months and my wife has quit her job too after a crazy discrimination thing at work (long story)

My next Post i shall writ about the rest (i have missed out a lot and thats a lot of Books, prep work, action fakery, actual action - I actually starting a Biz though its not doing the best and I realize more than ever even after been shown the paths and then somehow still having a Commodity Biz one that I fell into through oh I can emulate that for Cheap, lets get a slice if the PIE. Not what does the market WANT AND NEED D'oh - infact even that took me month of self sabotage back in June/July 2017 to overcome when i first came across the idea and how it had been Prevalidated and i can do it better,

I should have released it in Sep 2017 but then it was ready fully in Dec2017 but i held back perfecting it yeah right procrastination is perfection through my fear of failure, even though i know lodgicaly its the sweat of success - anyway i lunched it late April 2018 and learnt thus far i cant do it better nor compete with my rivals that have inhouse devs etc as opposed to the freelance ones i used to build the bulk (and got ripped off on after a great and cheap start - hmmmm - I still need them as they have me by the balls for now, though once they have my money - all goes quite)

Oh and I have NOT actually done any of the Ideas that I have held onto since around 2014 then constantly getting annoyed that someone else has done this and that and I have done nothing of real value ( though I have learned stuff through udemy and books esp the MVP concept, but yet to actually have the vailidating strategies out and about to test my other ideas whilst working on giving the one that i fell into a better go ie the one i have launched- that sound half hearted and yes i admit it is, it does not excite or drive me, but we all know passion is BS - On a postive I have a Biz and I didnt have one before, I was an employee...though I dont write my goals or do viz exercises etc to help driveme and give me fuel, even though i know i should from all that i read etc again faulure to ACT where it counts

Okay to that i bid thee adieu and hopefully a second post with the above will follow should you even give a damn and should i make the time to take action and real actions on my biz and personal growth

I really do hope I make better decisions and choices going forward and TAKE MASSIVE REAL ACTION amidst all the action fakery as I know I am a basket case but dang I will not let that Hold me BACK!!!

Takecare and God Speed my fellow Human and May you Gain SUCCESS and GIVE BACK
 
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MJ DeMarco

I followed the science; all I found was money.
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Thanks for the intro and welcome aboard.
 

RB96

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Mar 10, 2017
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Thanks for the intro and welcome aboard.

Thank You MJ it means alot

I apologize I whined alot yesterday and that we are meeting with such a unvaluable post filled with ME's.

I actually found it a little therapeutic like i can just vent!!! Let out some of the noise inside of me and just get on with stuff that needs to be done, though this was probably not the best place to do it

I Hope that others reading it that are in a similar position may be inspired to stop repeating the same thing time and time again and snaps them into action as I will do, I have my ups and downs but I will get through it and make an IMPACT (friggin bizzword nowadays I know)

I need to make a sales call though I know I am probably not going to do it, I really dont know how to get out of this rut though i have read and watched alot of stuff about it, So i know what to do just not doing it.

Anyone with any suggestions of things that helped them???

Any help is appreciated and it may help others lurking as I used to!

TC and God Bless
 

RB96

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Mar 10, 2017
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So its been 3 weeks since my last message on this thread

Its been a weird period

I have had great moments of clarity but the cloud moments have been far too common

The god forsaken nostalgia kicking in and me wanting to turn back the clock

I dont know how to get unstuck,

I am Insane, I keep doing the same ting wanting different results

I finally got around to listening to Hal Elrods Miracle Morning

BRILLIANT READ thanks MJ...

Now the Implementation

I was reading a friend message from Octover 2017 (who is 15 years my senior of which we are very alike (fixed mindset though portray growth to other, self actualized, brilliant idea guys but poor if any implementation)

And My god I am like a skipping record, since this journey began around October 2015

(though wananabe for like ever mainly around 2011)

The only thing that has moved forward has been time

Im like the Someday King and Victim Mindset PosterBoy


They say be careful of you labels as you live upto them

I know how logically i should be changing my circumstance but I am just not doing it

I am still waiting for someone to turn me On

Please HELP if there is anyone that can relate and managed to turn it around

I NEED TO HAVE TRUE PROGRESS
Idea = 1%
Implementation =99%

forget Pareto

Anyway Godbless and Godspeed to all
 
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MJ DeMarco

I followed the science; all I found was money.
Staff member
FASTLANE INSIDER
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
Read Rat-Race Escape!
Read Fastlane!
Read Unscripted!
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RB96

New Contributor
Read Fastlane!
Read Unscripted!
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Mar 10, 2017
12
8
United Kingdom
Then you will be waiting the rest of your life.

Find a strong meaning and purpose and the motivation/desire will find its way.

Here's an article that shows the difference between dabbling and strong M&P.

https://www.quora.com/What-would-be...creator-with-real-actions/answer/MJ-DeMarco-1

Thank You MJ for taking the time personally to reply ( I still get a OMG its actually MJ)

I honestly feel ashamed of this as I thought of myself as relatively intelligent but yes Someone or Something has not turned on my boosters lol

I know I must be my own HERO

Get myself to have lazer guided focus

Reading your article I am too comfortable, like the dog with the nail...I will find

My True Meaning and Purpose

I want my Son to be proud of me

I want to be a financial provider

I want be be a man of Merit and Value

I will change the Wants to Musts

Then to I WILL to

I AM

Thank You from the bottom of my heart as always
 

RB96

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Read Fastlane!
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Mar 10, 2017
12
8
United Kingdom
So I have a had a turbulent few weeks

Mainly lows and yes i have not done what I need to do, though I took part in some charity fundraising and that was brilliant

I need to and will start my Morning Routine that sets me up for the day of positivity and productivity! Today i woke up with dread as usual but i dawned on me that I live what i want kinda...Freedom, I have no need for an alarm clock as I have no "job" etc I have a roof over my head etc ... maybe I have it too good and thats what keeps me in this rut ... and I just call it fear of failing, being indecisive etc etc

In reality I should be up early ...(stop snoozing...I can snoooze for like an hour!!!) and getting calls and meetings done etc for what I started in April

Anyway

I listened to Russell brands Book about Addiction and by God it was eye opening that I am an addict and the 12 steps maybe a programme that is needed for me

Having said that I dont trust my brain and the shiny new syndrome

I have so much Negativity swimming around lately and having had my Identity stolen (I dont know how as I shred everything...like everything it did take me aback ....but I am over it now as I have no control over it)

The guilt has set in that I have not helped my Dad in the family Biz and coz of his graft and work is the reason why I could afford to quit work and try and find my own path, As when I worked with him after quitting all we did was argue and argue and got no where...

But TRY is not good enough... As I am lost but know I need to Pick and Commit and stop the scatter gun approach but I just dont want to Fail...though honestly speaking the Biz Venture when that I started like a Year ago and launched in Late April is ...because I have not been giving it my 100%


The Other night I went to an Entrepreneurial event...turned out to be an ACN Network marketing recruitment thingy!

It did get me thinking that maybe I should do Network marketing to help me Learn and get to know people etc but then again is it just shiny new syndrome :(
Where they talk about how they receive so much residual income etc drive nice cars in just a few years...but in reality its the minority and survivor bias kicks in...

Whats peoples thoughts on MLM or Network Marketing...I know Grant Cardone is a big believer in it?

Anyway Enough of my rant and vent. Hope everyone has been hustling hard and getting closer towards their Goals!
 
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