Do What You Love And the Money Will Follow!

[yveskleinsky]

I'm not bashing anyone. I'm stating the TRUTH. Most of this "be happy when you are starving" crap is for the birds. Now I'm not starving but my point is; No one is going to be happy when they are struggling. Except a fool. When people are in pain they express that pain. And so far what I have seen on wealth building forums is people that pretty much ignore and add to that pain via insult (i.e. Its your fault!). OR they simply ignore all together and play "rich people."

When the reality is most of the people here aren't rich. I'm thankful for the advice I was given BUT it still requires money which I don't have. Why? If I would have kept going with the job I'd probably have more money, be less stressed, and have to deal with less moody cornball customers.

Okay, you're in pain, I get it. You've had a lot of things go wrong and having your own business wasn't what you thought it would be. I get that too. I've been there, most of us have. Here's some friendly psychobabble for you: You are so caught up in your pain that you are projecting that pain onto people and comments made, without reading or understanding the context. My comments to HC or the workout girl were directed to them and not you. Your response to me (in regards to them) shows that you aren't able to see anything but your own pain right now. I also get that. Dude, most of us have been where you're at. We could potentially be the best friends you'll ever have if you'd just settle down and listen instead of attacking.

Here's some more of my 02 that you aren't going to like, your sentence, "Because I FOLLOWED bad advice..." the keyword in this sentence is not "FOLLOWED" but the word "I". Own it. So you made a mistake. We all have, welcome to the club. So you were duped by a "guru", or got some bad business advice, well again, get in line. (I attended a Rich Dad seminar where they were selling how to make a fortune in real estate and the price to learn was only $59,999--and people were lining up in droves, like cattle to the slaughter.) Your job in business as well as in life in general is to learn how to judge the quality of advice you get--unfortunately good judgment often comes from bad judgment. You don't hold the patent on pain here.

You say you would've been better off staying an employee. Well that might be true; I think most entrepreneurs feel that way when they are in the eye of the storm, and frankly not everyone has the personality style to be an entrepreneur. If this is the case so be it. You tried it and you hated it. There is no shame in that--in fact you should be very proud of yourself. You are among the few who dared venture out--you won't have all the "what if's" that others die with. ...Being an entrepreneur means that you are a trail blazer; the downside is that it's really easy to blaze that trail right over a cliff. You stuck your hand out to try and get more for yourself and your hand got slapped--hard. I get that. We all get that. Most entrepreneurs have several businesses or business ideas that fail before they find one that succeeds. Why? Because where you are is called the learning curve (aka the eye of the storm.) Most people after getting their hands slapped hard by the learning curve tend to quit, thinking, "Oh, I learned my lesson--all those gurus were wrong" or "Owning your own business is a joke." It's normal to feel the way you do, but you haven't failed--you are still in the curve. So take some time to analyze what you are doing wrong and what you are doing right. Be brutally honest with yourself. Everything that is going wrong write down what you could do to turn it around, and then pick and handful of ideas and move forward on them. There is no magic here; there is no getting around the learning curve. Hang in there.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

How can work not be associated with suffering?

When I was in "start-up" mode with my company, I worked long hours. Was I suffering? No. I enjoyed it because I had my "Whys" AND because the personal growth was fulfilling. That journey was fun! Fastlane isn't just about destinations, but also about a personal journey which will require growth, work (hopefully "fun work") and fulfillment.

When the company was mature, I worked less ... probably 1 hour a day. That was fun too because had I had a choice of working or going out and doing what I loved (pickup basketball, working out, travel). Personal growth should be rewarding and enjoyable.

The journey of writing this book ... I am working long hours on it but again, I don't consider it "work" or suffering ... more like a commitment to a dream whereas the journey is challenging, yet fun ... but it also is a Fastlane road that has the potential to yield long-term fruit, long after I toiled the writing effort.

You probably work as hard as anyone in your carpet business ... so in effect, you are working just as hard as anyone else. You are suffering because you have no ends, no why's, other to survive another month, pay the bills, and play 2 dozen hours of video games.

The difference in the two paradigms is this: You are not working a Fastlane plan that will yield freedom or pay the dividends of time. You trade your time for money.

The Fastlane plan is about building a money tree (a system, a cash flow) that bears fruit. That fruit isn't payment on your mortgage and your lifestyle for 1 month, but for your entire life.

So while many here are working hard including you, some are working their Fastlane plan which in the future, will bear the fruit of financial freedom and freedom from work, or as you call it "suffering".

So that said, here is the difference:

With respect to Jill, fast forward 5 years and she will own her day. She will have the full freedom to do whatever because she built her "money tree" or her system that bares the fruit of freedom.

With respect to Russ, fast forward 5 years and he will also be there. He will have choices. He can liquidate his B&B's and never work another day in his life. His new life could be watching his child grow every step of the way. Or, Russ might decide that "Heck, I enjoy running this B&B! So why sell?" Russ isn't suffering, he's living and enjoying ... and he has choices. Choices = freedom.

With respect to you, fast forward 5 years and you will still be cleaning carpets, trading the blood of your life, time, for dollars so you can pay the month's bills. This is because your plan doesn't create a money tree unless you save 10% of your paycheck and try to put faith into a 30 year mutual fund plan. (And people who subscribed to this plan are down 40% this year). You will have limited choices because you are still confined to the same structure -- "I need to work to pay the mortgage" ... that to me, is suffering.

Now, if you analyze the time invested, the work put forth by all three people, Jill, Russ, and You ... I would venture that all 3 of you invested similar amounts of time, or work. The difference? They are putting work into a system that pays lifelong dividends, you put your work into a system that trades your life for money, an exchange that pays your bills for 1 month. Then repeat. Trade life. Pay bills. Weekend. Trade life. Pay bills. Weekend.

I don't say that to jack you negatively, but it is a fact.

And for you, that just might be OK. If you enjoy cleaning dirty carpets on a daily basis, the Fastlane roadmap might not be for you ... and that's cool. Only you can determine what makes you happy and what makes you tick ... for some, this type of "trade" is perfectly acceptable and even makes them happy. Not everyone likes Pepsi, I for one, hate it. I need Coke.

I'm all about hard work and long hours, even suffering -- I will take a year long suffering for 40 years of freedom. Unfortunately, most people take 40 years of suffering for 2 weeks of freedom, or however long their paid vacation time lasts ....

 

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[AroundTheWorld]

Kimber,

Excellent, Excellent posts!!
I really commend you for trying.
I gave up on HCBailly about 6 months ago.

Some people thrive on complaining.
It is just a part of "who they are." (<--- Borrowing from Russ)

When the one person that is "helping" them finally draws a line in the sand and says enough.... they will just move on to someone new...

They always need someone to listen to their bitching.
I just don't have room in my life to help people like that anymore.

Of course, the door is not closed and locked.
It is closed.... but, if the person shows a GENUINE change in the destructive attitude, I'm always willing to open the door again. (HC <--- this last statement is for you)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And now, I hope this thread can turn back to MJ's excellent topic without spiraling down the HCBailly trap that far too many threads have fallen victim to.

 

[kimberland]

You have it backwards.
I have more successes BECAUSE I have more failures.
The failures always come first.

It took me 10 novels or so (in various stages of completion)
to get the first one published.
It took me over 500 resumes to get my first full time job
(at 500, I stopped counting).
I met thousands of men before meeting my husband.
I met with hundreds of advisors before one agreed to help me invest my $25 a month.

Can you honestly say you put THAT kind of effort
into your 'several things'?

Btw... my mamma, a very wise person, always told me
that we're only defensive when it's the truth.

 

[Runum]

I'm not bashing anyone. I'm stating the TRUTH. Most of this "be happy when you are starving" crap is for the birds. Now I'm not starving but my point is; No one is going to be happy when they are struggling. Except a fool. When people are in pain they express that pain. And so far what I have seen on wealth building forums is people that pretty much ignore and add to that pain via insult (i.e. Its your fault!). OR they simply ignore all together and play "rich people."

When the reality is most of the people here aren't rich. I'm thankful for the advice I was given BUT it still requires money which I don't have. Why? Because I FOLLOWED bad advice from wealth building gurus that said some of the same things that are being said here. If I would have kept going with the job I'd probably have more money, be less stressed, and have to deal with less moody cornball customers.

Sorry man, you may be stating what is true for you but your truth doesn't apply to me. It's time for you to man up and accept your responsibility in your life. You bought the RD book because something in your life wasn't right and you wanted someone else to tell you how to fix it. You are doing the same thing here. You are not doing well and you want someone to tell you how to make it all well. Quit waiting for other people to tell you how to fix your life.

As far as I know neither RK nor anyone else said this was easy. You're a grown up and you chose your path. Yeah life is kicking most of us right now, I understand.

Hey look at the alternative. You can work at a no brain job for 40 years, save your money in a company sponsered IRA, lose 50%+ of it's value, and get laid off. Yep, that's what I want for me and my family.

 

[ITA]

Just read this whole thread, here is my 2 cents (and a bit of negativity of my own, hey, this thread is contaminated already anyway :smxB: ):

1. HC (on page 1) was asking how could work not be pain, suffering. It is an issue I've struggled with myself. Only after working on my own business did I start to perceive work as fun, and then again, not always. But at least I'm working on my own thing, on my own terms, taking my own decisions and learning from them. I feel like I'm growing instead of being told what to do and doing it like an automaton. The feeling of freedom and personal growth is probably the most rewarding thing (so far). You just have to reframe the "work" as learning about life, psychology, and yourself, and keeping getting better at it.

2. To NeedMoneyFast: I believe if you fail, it IS your own fault. You may not be able to realize it yet. I'm failing myself, right now - I'm making a living but I'm not making as much as I would like. However, I know it is my own fault.

You are saying "I've read more books and implemented more strategies than you could ever know" and that says a lot about how you think. Mind you, again I could say the same thing - but I've come to realize that this is part of my problem, not something to boast about. If I had read less and tried less things half-assedly, and had taken more action in a focused way, I probably would be further down the road today. My mistake. I was too innocent to understand this back a few years ago. Now I get it (I think).

Also, even if all the "gurus" were 100% con artists (which they are not), and you had been conned, well, wouldn't it still be your own fault? Whose fault would it be?

3. Having said all that...and here is where I would like everyone's feedback, and it also relates to the original (long-forgotten :smxB: ) topic of the thread...I also get, truly get, NeedMoneyFast and HC's points when they say being a small entrepreneur is shitty and you work harder than an employee for what seems like not much more benefits. Every other day I'm wondering if did not make a massive mistake by not staying on as an employee.

This is compounded by the fact that I'm well-educated and could be making 6 figures in a white-collar job (and potentiall 7 figures later on up the ladder). I speak a bunch of languages fluently (which I learned the hard way, not from my parents). I'm good, and really enjoy "big picture", systematic, intellectual thinking, the type you would make in consulting or policy making. Yet right now as a small entrepreneur I'm basically chasing money. Every decision I make and work I do is about getting more money flowing in. It is very prosaic and, you know, just feels a bit dumb. Most of the small entrepreneurs I meet in real life are real good people but, no offense, they just aren't as smart as I am. Yet they are more driven than me and there is a good chance they will end up doing better. Sometimes I wonder if I'm not in the wrong game.

There is a success story in this forum where the poster types a sample of a page from his old journal, and it's a lot of negative self-talk about how he is university-graduated and his peers are successful in Fortune 500 jobs yet he is still broke and trying to make it in another totally crappy venture (selling paintings at the flea market, I believe). This is how I feel quite often. My venture is not totally crappy, but the only way I hang in there is by (1) enjoying the freedom and growth I mentioned above and (2) thinking it's only a stepping stone to something better, part of a learning curve. If the "something better" never happens, I'm going to be pretty crushed.

So, I'm not really doing what I love, and hoping the money will follow. But what if it doesn't? What if I wake up at 40 and realize I've "wasted" my late twenties and thirties working my a$$ off while my friends were partying and holidaying, and all I've got to show for it is gray hair and a business that is making more or less what I could have been making all along as a corporate drone? This thought often keeps me awake at night.

If you haven't slashed your wrists by now I would love to hear your thoughts on the above ;-)

 

[hatterasguy]

The only things that are guaranteed in this life are death and taxes.

You get a chance at success, its not guaranteed. Statisticly you have a what 1% chance? Its small.

Some people make it, some people don't, thats the way it is.

A job is no guarantee either, I have seen people who worked for banks for almost 20 years get fired and now work for $9 an hour in supermarkets....they lost there comfortable six figure middle management jobs and need something. They will never make that money again because they are to old.

 

[Russ H]

They're not cheating.

They're playing by the rules of business.

It's just that they never teach you these rules in business school-- or in books.

First rule is, any contract is not worth the paper it's printed on. You need the parties/people to actually *agree* on what's happening-- or the attys can rejigger things. It's not about "sneaking" something in the contract, or hoodwinking someone.

This is why honesty/integrity is valued-- if you look someone square in the eye an *tell* them what you want to do, and present it in such a way that benefits them-- they appreciate this.

This does not mean you show them all your cards.

It just means that you don't lie, or cheat, or tell them one thing and do another.

You do what you say.

HOWEVER . . .

You let them know that you may change your mind, or do things differently. So you have not lied to them if you do something differently.

And you get *really, really* good at "speaking their language"-- telling them things in their words, where they "hear" one thing-- but you have not said this.

Example:

Them: "We want a billion dollars"

You (nodding): "I'm certain we can work something out."

Did you tell them you'd give them a billion $$$??

Nope.

But you told them what they wanted to hear.

**************

Other things:

Lots of contingency and back up plans-- and LOTS of partnerships and alliances to allow the different plans to proceed.

These side deals are set up by scores of people-- attys, accts, business consultants-- staggering amounts of work.

And many are never used.

Why go to all that trouble?

To win.

To get what you want.

-Russ H.

 

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[HCBailly]

Bravo! Excellent article. I was thinking about making a topic about that subject, though I would have taken it a little further, at the risk of sounding too negative.

There are two problems with doing what you love to make money. You already mentioned the first, in that the vast majority of people simply don’t have the god-given skill, talent, motivation, up-bringing, whatever. The second problem is that even if you have that, you have to turn it into a job in order to make money, which IMHO, destroys what makes it what you love.

For example, I love playing games. If I had the talent (which I don’t), does that mean I could make a living at poker if I wanted to? Probably not. To do that would mean coming into “work†everyday, analyzing hands, statistics, and all the hard work and effort that would be required to make a consistent living at it. It would suck the fun out of the game, so it would no longer be something that I love.

Correct me if I misinterpreted, but at the end of the article, you essentially say that motivation is the key to building wealth, right? While I agree with that statement, I don’t see a true motivation for doing so. Some people can apparently fool themselves into believing that wealth can solve their problems for motivation, but at least to me, it doesn’t really.

Using your own examples, being your own boss is an illusion. Instead of having one boss to answer to, you now have hundreds of customers, employees, tenants, property manager, or stock holders to answer to. Circumstances of life, such as waking up without an alarm clock or writing a book can be worked around with some time management.

The only purpose I can see to building wealth is to do what only having money will allow you to do. Paying off a mortgage could be one of those, but is that really worth it? Is it really worth all the pain, effort, and time to achieve that? Sure, it would be exhilarating to finally get there, but how long will that feeling last? Will it last longer than the time it took to achieve it? Impossible. Once that problem is over with, people will always find new problems to worry about. It never ends.

That’s why I don’t get the concept of building wealth. It either fulfills illusionary perceptions about life or it doesn’t solve the internal issue behind the need to have it.

Why do I own my own business? Two reasons. First, I’ve obviously not solved my own internal issues (whatever they are, I don’t know). Second, since I cannot seem to defeat them or avoid the pain of work, my next best option would logically be to minimize it. This business gives me the best ability to do that. If a job would do it, I would have no problem answering to someone else. At least that way, I would only have one person to impress.

Maybe this is too negative, but I just don’t get building wealth, though I’d be happy to learn why. In the end, it doesn’t seem to really accomplish anything.

 

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[kimberland]

I know I have patience issues, but I want to be happy now, in my prime, not 10 years from now, when I’m old. I don’t want to suffer for 10 years to have my freedom. That’s nuts.

That's interesting
because haven't you been groaning
about your carpet cleaning business
for about five years or so?

If you had started building wealth then,
you would have been half way through your 'suffering.'

You can't build anything lasting
without delayed gratification.
Nothing.
Not relationships,
not wealth,
not anything.

 

[kimberland]

Wow, break out the pity party for one, HCBailly.
I can guarantee that I've had more failure and hardship
than you'll ever experience
so I don't have much sympathy for you.

I could point to any achiever on this board
and say they've likely had more failure than you also.
Why?
Because doers do
and often we do the wrong thing.
But we don't whine about it (much).
We dust ourselves off and try something different.

You sound like you simply give up and wallow.
...for years.

 

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[yveskleinsky]

HC-

I think a large part of your confusion, frustration and contemplation of happiness, success and money is in large part due to your world view. For years now I've noticed that you paint every picture in different shades of gray and I've never seen you in any state other than an introspective malaise.

Is there anything in, or any area of, your life where you do feel successful or happy--even if that feeling is fleeting?

...My point being is that if you can't find joy in the small things, odds are you won't find it in the big things either.

 

[Runum]

The ban I put on him is a temporary, one day ban. My intention is to allow this to cool off and maybe we can reach a solution. I've never tried this before and I don't know if it will work.

I agree, NeedFastMoney, sounds like he's at his wit's end and is just venting. I do hope he sleeps it off and comes back more amicable. Stay tuned.:cheers:

 

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[SteveO]

I don't know much about your situation ITA but, there is more than one way to make your programs work.

I have always been in the camp that takes an approach utilizing money as a startup. Do what you do best and make the most money that you can. Spend only what you need to and put the rest to work. Formulate a plan during this time of how you can leverage and put that money to work when the time is right.

There are a lot of doors that are opened with the use of cash.

Nothing wrong with a job that is deemed "temporary".

 

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[AroundTheWorld]

So, I'm not really doing what I love, and hoping the money will follow. But what if it doesn't? What if I wake up at 40 and realize I've "wasted" my late twenties and thirties working my a$$ off while my friends were partying and holidaying, and all I've got to show for it is gray hair and a business that is making more or less what I could have been making all along as a corporate drone? This thought often keeps me awake at night.

That is the choice you make. It is the choice we all make. As a good friend of mine says.... (eh hem - yves) There are no guarantees on this path we have chosen.

1. Maybe we will fail.
2. Maybe we.... no... its a given... we will experience challenges that are much greater than they would be if we stuck with the JOB.

If you can not accept and take personal responsibility for #1 and #2 above, then the life outside the safe secure job is not for you. That is perfectly okay - - - as long as you make that decision for yourself.

If it isn't for you, there is no shame in going back to a job (or never leaving one.) If you can say that you fully accept the possibility of failure... you fully accept that your life will be filled with challenges you can't even imagine... then go for it. But do it knowing that you made the choice. You weighed the risk and the reward and you decided what to do.

 

[yveskleinsky]

3.I also get, truly get, NeedMoneyFast and HC's points when they say being a small entrepreneur is shitty and you work harder than an employee for what seems like not much more benefits. Every other day I'm wondering if did not make a massive mistake by not staying on as an employee.

This is compounded by the fact that I'm well-educated and could be making 6 figures in a white-collar job (and potentiall 7 figures later on up the ladder). I speak a bunch of languages fluently (which I learned the hard way, not from my parents). I'm good, and really enjoy "big picture", systematic, intellectual thinking, the type you would make in consulting or policy making. Yet right now as a small entrepreneur I'm basically chasing money. Every decision I make and work I do is about getting more money flowing in. It is very prosaic and, you know, just feels a bit dumb. Most of the small entrepreneurs I meet in real life are real good people but, no offense, they just aren't as smart as I am. Yet they are more driven than me and there is a good chance they will end up doing better. Sometimes I wonder if I'm not in the wrong game.

Ah! You just stumbled across the intersection between risk and reward! This intersection has claimed many an entrpreneur, including myself at times. Could you spend 20 years trying to get a business off the ground after pouring your life savings into it? Yes. Could you fail. Yes. Would it be crushing? Hell yes. ...But it happens everyday, to entreprenurs at every level of success, expertise and intelligence. I think if you were to ask around, you'd probably find several people on this forum that have experienced a total financial wipeout after putting their blood, sweat and tears into a business, only to see it never "breathe" on its own.

There is no crystal ball out there and there is no magic. Somewhere along the line someone, somewhere started a terrible rumor that having your own business would be easy. That you would simply write up a business plan, get some funding, chart your course, work 40 hours a week and the ride would be smooth sailing--after all you are your own boss and you had this great plan. Then reality sets in. You realize that your business plan is more useful as orgami and this ride to financial freedom is full of challenge after challenge. (Kinda like the difference between reading a book on raising a baby and actually raising a baby lol.) The reality is that most businesses require as much if not more attention that a newborn baby. In the start up stage there is generally a period where you wonder if you'll ever sleep, where all your time and money just went and just how long this stage will last. You spend 80+ hours a week trying to get this needy, resource gobbling baby to quiet down and give you some peace. Sometime this stage lasts for weeks, sometimes for years. ...Now there are some people who have babies who are wonderful. They sleep 18 a day and require very little. ...Actually it's these people who keep the rumor going, lol. Regardless, sometimes you just don't know what you are going to get. You could've had 3 babies prior that were all wonderful and then the 4th does nothing but rattle your confidence in your ability to parent.

I'm not saying this to discourage you, I'm saying this so you know what you are in for, so when you find your "bundle of joy" to be nothing more that something you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy, you won't think that it's just you lol. ...Like you said, success often follows the bold. Why? Because the bold stay the course and ride out the infant years; they aren't overwhelmed by the challenges of today, because they stay focused on the point where the baby can become self-sufficient.

At the end of the day, the real question you need to ask yourself isn't really whether or not you can stomach trying, potentially failing and looking back when you are 80 wondering where your time and money went. The question is, can you stomach never trying, never knowing, being 80 and looking back with regrets? If you answer yes to the latter, perhaps you should consider getting something more stable. ...Again, there is nothing wrong with this path--it is 100% personal choice.

 

[Bobo]

Several thoughts come to mind....

First... Yves continues her drive toward making the sarcasm hall of fame on the first ballot - I hope to give the keynote speech.

Second... I actually think it's important to recognize that on an entrepreneurial forum the one thing you are certain to find is a plethora of people with a long track record of stunning failures amongst their successes. Entrepreneurs fail daily, hell, we eat it up - we like to go out and try crazy shit just because it sounds fun just as often as we do soundly logical, well researched things. Jill and I had just finished a second bottle of wine at a Cafe in Rome when we decided that a finance major and a software engineer with no background in design or manufacturing or retail ought to say screw it and become fashion designers since we were in Italy and drinkin. We had some stunning successes and Wily Coyote-esque disasters on that one but damn - we learned a ton!

Entrepreneurs are born failures. Failing has a pre-requisite, it requires the cajones (or cajonettes I spose) to go out on a limb. Some times the damn thing breaks off, sometimes you get the fruit.

There are two sayings that keep me going as an entrepreneurial wannabe

1. (Paraphrasing) No, I didn't fail 2000 times you a**hole, I found 2000 ways not to make a light bulb - Thomas Edison

2. About 5 years ago I woke up one day and realized that happiness really is a choice, you wake up and decide to be happy or you don't. Over the last 5 years I've had ups and downs, joy and sorrow but day in and day out I am damn near annoyingly happy 90% of the time - Bobo 2009


Corny truism of the day: Failure is an event, not a destination.

Come to think of it... I think maybe I'm happy because I decided I didn't like grownup rules and went back to kindergarten rules, if you don't like the outcome just shout "Do Over!" and tee it up again

 

[wildambitions]

None taken. So if the sun exploded you would blame yourself too? Dumb question, but it clearly speaks for itself.

No, but this is not a "fault" issue, you have changed your argument. Am I accountable for being there, yes, because I have been accountable to myself for still being alive (with what I do have control of) at which time the sun explodes. I don't see the sense in placing any blame anywhere.

The same goes with death. We can control the happening of the actual event to some degree, but it will happen no matter how much we actively try to evade it. Some things cannot be controlled.

Again, not a "fault" issue. My disagreement was not about what we have control of or don't have control of. My point is that no one else can be accountable for your (or mine) circumstances. Yes, there are some things we have less control of within ourselves but we are still nonetheless accountable and completely at "fault" for where we are, who we are and where we go and become.

You can steer free from a lot of stuff, but some stuff you cannot escape from through your own efforts alone (even if your tried very hard).

I would not want to escape anything that is presented to me. What would be left to learn? Either way, whatever is there in front of me, is there for me to deal with because it is a direct result of choices I made up until this point that has these particular circumstances in front of me now.

You cannot avoid meeting certain people. You can avoid a lot of things and actively improve other things. But some things are not meant to be no matter how hard you believe it.

A chance meeting or encounter of anyone... I would still own up to the fact that because of the circumstances that led me to make the choices I made, I am here, now, to deal with these people. As far as things that are not meant to be... whatever is in front of you is what was actually meant to be. You are where you are because of you. I am where I am because of me, I accept that and life is easy.

Some day when you walk down the street and walks by a store window and suddently the whole place blows up and you die. Then, tell me: how could you have possibly have improved that situation without having a hint of an idea that that store would blow up exactly the moment you walked by? You couldn't. You could actively have avoided it, IF you knew there was actually a slight chance of it happening. But as you see, some stuff can be controlled and managed, other things are not possible to manage.

My death in the above situation would not change the fact that I was there at that moment because of me and choices I made. Now sure, the cause of my death was certainly a result of someone else's actions, but ultimately I was there... for whatever reason and I can be accountable for that. I do not need to know things to be accountable for myself, I do not need to control anything but my own thoughts and action.

You may think this is just silly examples, but they are possibilities just as anyhting else that might happen without us even having the slightest chance of knowing or being able to respond.

I can give numerous other scenarios that might happen and things we may not even be able to prevent. Because it can't be prevented. You can't prevent things that are not possible to actually diagnos in the first place.

We are not expected to know how to respond to anything and everything that comes along, but I do believe we are "at fault" for being where ever we are, 100%. 100% accountable to and for ourselves.

Other's choices and actions contribute to the complexity of our own choices and actions, this is not in dispute. Don't misunderstand the argument, and perhaps we are saying much of the same thing. It IS a crazy intermingled complexity of everyone's circumstances and choices that make up everything that happens.

How can you prevent a customer from not buying from you? How can you actively have everyone you talk too buy your item. You can't. It is not realistic. But if we follow your quest for "everything is manageable if you just set your mind on it" then you need to force people to purchase from you. You cannot manage if customers buy from you or not. You can create a scenario that increases the probability for it happening (the manageable part), but it will still not be entirely up to you. There will be an uncertain event. A small or big number of people saying "NO thanks". Non-manageable things.

I do not have control of any customer's buying choices (nor would I want to), I don't expect everyone I talk to to buy my item - I expect them to make their own accountable decisions. I don't think I said "everything was manageable if you set you mind to it."

My point is accept responsibility and be accountable to and for yourself always. Placing blame for anything or on anyone else might make you feel good (and even make others feel sorry for you) but only your choices and actions, based on the circumstances you have in front of you right now, can and will move you from where you are to wherever else you may want to be.

 

[fanocks2003]

Sorry about that, I was in a rush when I signed up, I fixed it...
Anyway I was wondering what it is they do exactly. I'm not so devious myself so I would not know what to look for. I imagine there are legal loopholes in contract law for example, or bait and switch.

I wonder if they only do it to small players or if they try to cheat other big players. It would seem it would be a bad idea to cheat someone you depend on long term. Do these people achieve long term success by these methods?

I'm not looking for any ideas:smxB:, just looking for potential pitfalls.

Thanks for your help!

As Russ mentioned: Most of the CEO's play by the rules. That is the only way to win long-term and still have people want to do business with you.

But this is the thing: You can read an agreement so many ways and still be honest and legal. That is why you need legal help with negotiating agreements because there are so many ways you can slip out of a deal without doing anything illegal or anything unethical. You just follow what the written paper says you can and cannot do.

I have met CEO's who signed an agreement of mine, but then just 2 weeks later send an email and says that their company will withdraw from the partnership because of clause X or Y. And legally they could remove themselfs from any obligation to my company because their was a clear loophole from the get go. There wasn't anything unethical or illegal in doing so from his side. Nothing at all. The agreement gave him the opportunity to do so. And believe me, sharp CEO's will use those weak clauses to their benefit if they see a gain in it. And they very often do.

That is one way the business world works. There are so many other things happening in business that many people don't want to aknowledge. Stuff like the really criminal elements who do not at all play by the rules. People who will actually do illegal things to win. Such people exists and in the long term I am certain you will meet at least one such human being.

It's better to be well prepared that's all. Self-preservation.

 

[LaughedAt]

I was reading [ame=http://www.amazon.com/Good-Great-Companies-Leap-Others/dp/0066620996/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1244882093&sr=8-1]Amazon.com: Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap... and Others Don't: Jim Collins: Books[/ame]
and I found a section about passion and how it made companies go from good to great, and there's a quote I thought will do good for this thread:
"The good-to-great companies did not say, "Okay folks, let's get passionate about what we do". Sensibly, they went the other way entirely: We should only do those things that we can get passionate about.
This doesn't mean, however, that you have to be passionate about the mechanics of the business per se (although you might be). The passion circle can be focused equally on what the company stands for. For example, the Fannie Mae people were not passionate about the mechanical process of packaging mortgages into market securities. But they were terrifically motivated by the whole idea of helping people of all classes, backgrounds and races realize the American dream of owning their home.
As another executive summed up, "I see us as a key mechanism for strengthening the whole social fabric of America. Whenever I drive through difficult neighborhoods that are coming back because more families own their homes, I return to work reenergized".

So the way Jim Collins sees it, is that you have to be passionate about what you & your company do for the industry, and I have to agree with him.
You can be passionate about the technical side of running a business and that can be a big plus, however it's not required to achieve success.
As I recall, I remember MJ saying he was motivated by his company helping other businesses achieve greater success, and that is passion, I'm sure money entrepreneurs are not passionate about the industry they're in, I don't think Wayne Huizenga (founder of Waste Management, Inc.) was passionate about waste, however he built a truly successful company because he was passionate about his company's contributions to society and the business world, he was providing jobs, making the world a cleaner place & getting very rich in the process, how cool is that!
So in order to be successful, have passion, be passionate about being in business and be passionate about what your company does and the journey to success can be a lot more enjoyable.

 

[SaraK]

Thanks for the great article MJ, and for all the wonderful posts from everyone else. I have been struggling with this question recently as I try to decide what fastlane vehicle to focus on. I have heard the "do what you love" advice as well as the "do what makes money now and you can do what you love when you're financially free" advice and wasn't sure what to believe.

It really helps that the article makes the distinction of: can you make money doing what you love? There are some people who do, and are very happy, but not everyone can. Closely related to that is the question: If I did what I love for money, would that take the fun/meaning out of it? So those are things I need to really think about and figure out.

Even if one can't make a living doing what one loves, I think there should still be the opportunity to learn something interesting and work towards a higher purpose in one's fastlane plan. Every job has some downsides, but one should try to keep the downsides to a minimum and increase the enjoyment one gets from one's work.

Right now what I'm struggling with is, do I make my "dream" business my fastlane strategy, or do I wait and do it after I'm financially free? I'd appreciate feedback from the insightful gang here. On the one hand, my dream biz will probably take years to bring to full scale so I'd like to get started sooner than later, especially because of all the good it could do. On the other hand, I don't want money (i.e., needing it to be highly profitable) to get in the way of doing what is best for the cause.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Do What You Love And the Money Will Follow!

Ehh ... well, not exactly.

“Do What You Love And the Money Will Follow!†*|*theFastlaneToMillions.com

 

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[Jill]

Great article, MJ. I was just getting ready to tell you all the reasons I disagree with you (for probably the first time. I was a little disappointed, really!) Then I read the article. Agree completely! Good stuff.

 

[kimberland]

Holy crap!
This is my story!

I always wanted to write romance novels.
I couldn't justify it financially
because frankly, my skills in business were more highly valued
than my skills as a writer.

Then I amassed enough cash (for the hubby and I)
and said 'screw it! I'm writing!'
I might never make a profit
(though I expect I will - the way things are going)
but wow, am I having fun!

BTW...
Most of my author buddies are doing it for the cash.
Totally different game
and it doesn't look as much fun either.

I don't know how much you can 'love' anything
when you're dead broke
and worrying about putting food on the table.

 

[kimberland]

Wealth is about freedom.
It is about taking the money out of every single decision
because it is no longer a factor.

For example:
The hubby's uncle phones us up in November.
He needs help putting up the Christmas lights
so we, having nothing else to do that weekend,
get on a plane and help him put up his lights.
We don't discuss whether the $500 or so is worth it
because we don't care.

Debt and poverty is like a weight around your neck.
You don't realize how heavy it is
until you take it off.

 

[Jill]

Maybe this is too negative, but I just don’t get building wealth, though I’d be happy to learn why. In the end, it doesn’t seem to really accomplish anything.

Au contraire! Well, it depends on waht you mean by "building wealth". If you are only talking about building wealth for wealthsake, then I would agree to an extent.

But for myself, building INCOME is not about a number on a spreadsheet. It is not about buying toys. To my mind, true wealth buys choices. Can you choose to spend all 24 of your hours today and tomorrow and the next day doing exactly what you wish? Or do you find yourself consulting your wallet, as Kimberland said? If you have to ask yourself "Money may I?" when you consider placing your child in private school or taking a vacation or contributing to your favorite charity, then money is controlling your choices.

 

[HCBailly]

I think that freedom too is an illusion. You can free yourself from one master only to be a slave to another. Let’s take your own question as an example:

“Can you choose to spend all 24 hours today and tomorrow and the next day doing exactly as you wish?â€

Obviously, for me, the answer is no. Why? Let’s pretend that money is the reason. Then, I have a choice. Do I continue working a normal workload to maintain my current level of existence, or do I work harder to achieve a wealthier level of existence?

I have no illusions about building wealth. It’s hard. Very hard. You have to have an enormous amount of motivation to succeed at it, which most people don’t have. Most people who are wealthy EARN it one way or another, and certainly not through manual labor. IMHO, the amount of money one earns is directly proportional to the amount of effort they put into it.

Let’s arbitrarily say that it would take an average person 10 years to achieve complete and everlasting financial freedom. The amount of money that follows would be the result of all the hard work and effort that went into the previous 10 years. I cannot possibly see how that would be worth it. In my mind, there’s no way that any amount of pleasure gained from financial freedom could possibly outweigh the amount of pain required to attain it.

I know I have patience issues, but I want to be happy now, in my prime, not 10 years from now, when I’m old. I don’t want to suffer for 10 years to have my freedom. That’s nuts. If building wealth wasn’t suffering, then you wouldn’t need to do it in the first place. As stated in the article, “People pay to have their needs and wants solved.†In other words, they pay to have someone else take the pain away from them. That’s why we get paid.

I suppose you’re right, Kimberland. I don’tsee how heavy this “weight†is.

 

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[Jill]

Interesting insight, HC. You seem to think that "working hard" = "suffering". You seem to equate happiness with doing what you want 24 hrs/day. That's why there's so much talk about balance nowadays.

Everyone's sitch is different, but here's how it works for us. My husband and I work pretty hard 50+ hrs/wk at jobs that are truly NOT fun.

But we spend a few evening and weekend hours working our "fastlane plan" together, in our beautiful office, in our beautiful home, between bike rides in our beautiful neighborhood, while visiting with our wonderful friends and neighbors over lovely wine and meals that my husband prepares for us. We travel to exotic locations around the world 3-4 weeks of the year, spending much of our beach, train and cafe time talking about our plans and dreams. You see, the fastlane part of our plan inspires and excites us. We work it together and it is fun. It makes us happy.

Because we take time (and $) to enjoy the journey in a bit more luxury than some, the journey will for us take a bit longer. We could sell everything, live in a tiny apartment, drive beater cars and eat on $100/mo. But we've chosen a different path. Not knocking anyone who would choose this path. But we are committed to enjoy every moment of it. It is, after all, our lives we're talking about.

I would recommend that you invest in Tony Robbin's set of CDs. He talks a lot about your paradigms and associations. It sounds as if you have clearly associated "work" with "misery". It doesnt' have to be that way. Just my 2 cents. But whatever your journey, make it worth the while.

 

[Russ H]

What a great way to look at this, MJ.

Financial freedom allows you to "do what you love".

In this case, the money doesn't follow.

It leads.

So instead of "Do what you love, the money will follow",

You reverse it:

Get financially free,
and money allows you to do what you love.

Very cool.

-Russ H.

 

[HCBailly]

I like where this is going.

How can work not be associated with suffering? I don’t mean like concentration camps, just in general. Honestly, I would like to know. We do work for someone else, so that they don’t have to exercise effort and/or endure pain. That’s why we get paid, isn’t it? If it weren’t, then there would be no need for financial freedom. We would just work long enough until we got what we wanted.

Someone once told me that equating money with pain is a perception of the poor. For the poor, the only way to make more money is to endure more pain. When I first started out building wealth, I didn’t believe this, because I only saw the end result. I didn’t see all the hard work and effort that was required to developing a truly passive income generator.

I like your approach to building wealth, because you try to make the journey as enjoyable as possible. I do that myself with my current venture. I just don’t see the benefits outweighing the costs.

It reminds me of the last poker tournament I played, which was a professional event. I even made Day 2, where I was subsequently trashed by the real pros. While proud of the result, it got me thinking, “What if I won?†I put so many hours of my life into practicing my game, reading people, and bluffing ability. Of course, I knew I wouldn’t be able to compete with someone who didn’t have a full-time job. Still, all those hours of working on the game turned it into a job. It wasn’t fun anymore and winning wouldn’t have made it worth it, so I quit.

The same applies to building wealth to me. I don’t want people to feel sorry for me. I don’t. I’m just seeking understanding of how exercising more effort and enduring more pain can be worth less happiness, even if I succeed. It doesn’t make mathematical sense to me. If something costs more than it generates, why do it?

I’m sorry to bring my personal issue into this, but I hope this is evolving the discussion of the article.

 

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