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Am I becoming arrogant?

camski

Contributor
Jul 24, 2007
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Noblesville, IN
I visited the RDPD forum this morning just to check out what was going on there and lets just say that I was less than pleased about the quality of that forum now. Now before anyone thinks that I am just starting a bash rdpd forum, hear me out. In defense of them they have finally started a off topic section to somewhat corral the conspiracy theory bunch ( a suggestion that I threw out and was flamed for by many there) . But I wonder if that resulted more from the creation of this forum rather than anything else. But to my point, my displeasure with the quality of the posters theirstarted me to think, has my somewhat limited success in creating wealth caused me to become somewhat arrogant? Am I being too judgemental about the type of posts and posters there and am I in some way becoming somewhat elitist?
Or have I just progressed to a higher plane and outgrew what that place has to offer me? Look I dont pretend to be as successful as some others here on this forum ( because I am not) but compared to where I was just three years ago when I first picked up the RDPD book I have come a long way. I have had my share of successes. I own a catering co./restaurant and some commercial real estate as well as some other investments and am looking for more all the time. I feel I am walking the walk and not just talking the talk and I seem to find myself having less and less patience with those who just talk. It just seems like so many people on the RDPD forum are just talking about things and doing nothing. Even the first timers dont even have enough gumption or intellect to read before posting the " I am new how do I start?" question.
Again am I judging the new people too harshly? I know when I first started reading that forum I lurked for a long time before posting because I spent more time reading rather than writing trying to learn all I could. Is it arrogant of me to expect others to do the same? Have my expectations of others become too high and too rigid? Or has that forum and the quality of people there deteriorated so much that someone like myself just doesnt fit in there anymore. i would be interested in your thoughts on this.
 

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andviv

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In my opinion there are two versions of the same reality. One is that there are a lot of posters with an aggressive demeanor that lower the quality of the forums as a whole. In the other hand, I've found a very common situation among those that have made it. After you cross that bridge and realize that no, it wasn't that difficult and that you just had to take action, then you somehow lose the patient with those that are afraid of taking the first step.

I remember when I started reading the RDPD forums I was all scared and did not get what people were telling me. Good, simple advice like "call realtors to get listings for your market" sounded too complicated. Once I took action I realized that it was pretty simple (not easy, but simple).

It is tough when you give people advice and they just keep questioning you. If they don't want to follow advice then why they ask? But like I said, once you cross that bridge and break that mental barrier then it is easy to forget how scared we were when we were just forum-readers and not action takers. That is why I admire even more those that, after making millions, still stay in the forums and try to help others.
 

kidgas

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Jul 25, 2007
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I can't believe that any of the "doers" would think of it as arrogant. Unfortunately, I think you are seeing a lot of the difference between the entrepeneurial spirit and the mindset of an employee. The entrepeneur will read and seek much of the answer for him/herself and ask questions when necessary to move on. The employee will always start with "what do I do". The employee lacks the independence to keep moving forward without being lead or dragged the entire way. It is just part of what makes the difference between the few and the masses. It's not going to change.
 

MJ DeMarco

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Cameron,

There is nothing wrong in your thought process. You choose to surround yourself with better people. When the wrong people start infiltrating your life, its time to move elsewhere, take a turn down a new road, exit the room, or perform an exorcism.

"Experts in doing nothing" shouldn't be disclosing business and/or financial advice which is the case for some other places.

Congrats on the great progress you seem to be making.
 

Russ H

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Funny you bring this up, as I went through the same thing.

I too was scared (terrified) when I first found the RD forums. So many people there were more advanced than me. Even the lingo they used (REO, BK, HELOC, COCR*) had me googling these for descriptions (descriptions are provided at the end of this post, if any of you are scratching your heads).

I lurked for *months* (over a year) before getting up enough courage to post a single wishy-washy meek answer on the cashflow games forums.

No one flamed or killed me, so my courage increased over the next few weeks, and I posted again.

It was months before I had enough confidence to post my own question-- but that was in part b/c I'd spent over a year reading past posts, and using the site's search engine to answer my questions (I found a LOT of answers by using the search-- to this day, it's what I do before I post any kind of question).

I didn't want to be one of those noobs who found the site and asked the same basic question that had been asked hundreds of times before.

The more time I spent on the RD site, the more "in the groove" I felt with the other posters. Even if they far outdid me in experience (most all of them did), everyone was incredibly respectful and helpful. And friendly! :)

I was hooked.

I spent *hours* combing the forums, helping folks with basic questions I could answer, and learning gobs of information about what directions I should be heading in next.

The process took lots of time, reading, and commitment on my part, but it was *so* worth it.

It took me to the next level.

When Diane Kennedy started posting, I really got involved. Looking back, this was the Golden Age of the RD forums for me. There were so many high quality posters-- and threads-- that I just couldn't keep up with all of the great information.

I started working hard to become a contributing member of the community, with the hopes that someday, I too could help others at the level these advanced folks were.

As I picked up experience, that happened.

But at the same time, something very disturbing was going on. The RD forums were getting trolls, whose sole purpose in life was to propagate useless inflammatory threads.

It was an incredible drain, and none of the regulars liked it.

But RD HQ didn't do anything about it.

That was back in 2003.

After meeting RK this year, and hearing him share his personal feelings about the usefulness of the internet with us (i.e., that it's a "f*cking waste of time"), the downhill slide of the RD forums began to make sense:

The RD forums were getting clotted up with garbage, b/c the leader of the company didn't see any value in spending ANY time (at all) on the internet.

Like so many of us, he had creating his own reality:

He believed the 'net was a time waster, and through lack of mgt, his forums became a haven for time wasters.

Truly Sad. :nonod:

**************

But I'm feeling much better now! :D (Thanks, MJ) :hurray:

Perhaps we can take these forums to the next level-- and, at the same time-- renew the mutual respect, sharing, friendliness, and expertise of those classic RD forums days.

Hey, I guy can dream, right?

-Russ H.

* Definitions for above acronyms:

REO: Real Estate Owned. Property in possession of a lender as a result of foreclosure or forfeiture.

BK: Bankrupt

HELOC: Home Equity Line Of Credit

COCR: Cash On Cash Return
 

Jason_MI

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Jul 25, 2007
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I don't think your arrogant.

I specifically asked some of them (those that were posting such way, way off-topic threads), about their age and education level. It wasn't to be an a$$, but because I'm becoming to believe (and I think research backs this up), that young, less-educated males are more likely to engage in thought processes that place a 'blame' on others for current conditions. What made it more unbearable was the lack of cogent thinking in the arguments. It's like talking to a drunk on the street.

I've never been a huge RK devotee; I have read one book, listened to one tape set, and I although I might not agree with the suggested path he took, or suggests, mainly because I think that everyone's path is very, very personal, and should be tied to their goals through plans, I do agree with four or five real basic tenants he sets forth. And one of them is that you need to look around, and look at the people you're interacting with; they are you. If they are, as we've seen, a group that complains, does nothing, and thinks small; then that's you, too.

I really, really liked the RDPD forums because they used to comprise a core group of people that, even if I really disagreed with them, WERE doing something; they were moving.

So no, you're not being arrogant. I just hope I can live up to the ranks of who's here right now.
 
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camski

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Jul 24, 2007
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Noblesville, IN
I appreciate everyone's feedback. It is nice to know that others feel the same way I do. I guess while I am at it I would like to pose another question to everyone. Do you feel like a minority or part of the majority in your peer group. What I mean by this is, because of the mindset that most of us have here do you feel that your peer group doesnt understand or thinks that your mindset runs contrary to the majority of the people in your group. In my instance most of my friends and family cannot understand why I work 7 days a week and continue to put more and more on my plate. They are of the 40 hour week mindset and I am not. I yearn to make more and achieve more and am willing to sacrifice in order to do so. They want more (who doesnt) but are not willing to give up anything to do so. So that makes me sort of on the outside looking in. Not that I mind that I am in a minority because I truly believe in the path that I have chosen but I still notice it nonetheless.
Was just wondering if anyone else felt that way too or have noticed that from their friends and family.
 

kimberland

Bronze Contributor
Jul 25, 2007
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Do you feel like a minority or part of the majority in your peer group.
My core gang consists mostly of successful people
(because we are all action takers and action takers end up successful... eventually).
We're all taking different routes 'cause we're all different people
but we all do.
Why?
Because we get frustrated with the dreamers.

I am the sole oddball in my family however.
I'm the only one of 6 kids with her own home
(the rest are renting).
I'm the only one with a positive net worth.

That's their choice.
They know how to build wealth.
Its not rocket science.
They simply do not do.

: )
 

triple J

New Contributor
Aug 8, 2007
48
13
21
Utica, NY
Camski,

You aren't arrogant. Just fed up! The RD forum has become boring if you want to read about business, stocks, RE, etc. Isn't that suppose to be the purpose of the forum? That's why you're in the right place now. I also am struggling finding like minded people to be around. I don't have many in my circle now. Family, friends all have jobs and are very content. But I love them all. So I have decided that I need to add some like minded foks to my circle. That's why I'm here.

Cheers!
 

andviv

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Do you feel like a minority or part of the majority in your peer group. .. because of the mindset that most of us have here do you feel that your peer group doesnt understand or thinks that your mindset runs contrary to the majority of the people in your group.
Yep, been there.

I used to be a lot like that. When I realized that my group of peers and/or friends were not helping me to get to the next level then I decided to do something about it.

I desperately focused on being one of the 25 that would be in the RDPD Forum members get together (I'll always be grateful, Erin). I took the time and paid the price to travel to Scottsdale to meet people that could help me get to the next level. It worked. Now I have access to a small network of doers and also got to meet one of the members that lives only like 20 miles from my house. She and I try to meet regularly to keep supporting each other.

A week or so ago bflbob was visiting the area and the three of us had our mini-meetup to keep in touch and keep surrounding ourselves with people that are doing it. Also I try to contribute to the forum as a way to give back. People have helped me, it is just fair to help others. This forum is, to me, a great networking tool.

In summary, my message is, yes, I was there and when I realized it then worked to change it. When I count the 5 people I talk most often this days I find myself surrounded by doers and successful people.
 

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